FRED Entertainment

March 17, 2008

TV Or Not TV: 3/17 – 3/23

Filed under: Columns,TV Or Not TV — admin @ 1:50 am

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A new week brings us new television and new recommendations. I am, however, going to start this week off with something I didn’t imagine I’d ever do in this type of a column: apologies.

My first apology is to New Amsterdam (FOX Mondays, 9 PM). I mocked the show last week but in light of the options that we have the show is actually pretty entertaining. Hopefully my mentioning it led you to watching the show.

My second apology is in the way of an omission. John Adams is a seven part epic mini-series running on HBO that I am sure will be played plenty of times for you to catch it even if you missed the premier of Part 1 on Sunday, 3/16. Paul Giamatti has the title role and is, in my opinion, one of the best actors out there.

This week on television we are seeing a mixed bag of new shows and reality television. We’ve always seen both, but now we are getting over run with more of the latter over the former. If you are a fan of reality television you have something to enjoy almost every night of the week. If you aren’t, then there are slim pickings out there. Things will continue to be pretty bleak until April when we’ll start to finally see an influx of scripted shows finally flowing back in.

The final blow to this week is that it culminates into a holiday weekend, so the usually light Friday through Sunday schedule is even lighter. I have tried to prepare a bit of the more eclectic and not so well publicized list of programming to give you some interesting alternatives.

I’d also like to abuse my position and put out a plea to have you watch Jericho and Reaper this week. Both shows have not yet been picked up for next season, and Reaper is definitely considered a show that is “on the bubble” for cancellation. This is a completely self-serving request because I enjoy both shows and definitely want to see them return.

MONDAY

CBS ““ 8:00 PM ““ 10:00 PM: All of the CBS sitcoms are brand new. I’d suggest on taking in How I Met Your Mother since Britney Spears will have a guest spot in the near future.

ABC ““ 8:00 PM ““ 10:00 PM: It is reality night overdrive tonight on ABC. First up, Dancing with the Stars. You can’t go wrong with Steve Guttenberg. Second up is The Bachelor: London Calling where they hope that a Bachelor with a British accent will class up this tired concept.

TUESDAY

FOX ““ 8:00 PM: The skunk headed girl (Amanda Overmyer) is STILL on American Idol. I got suspicious and, sure enough, she’s the chosen contestant this year on VotefortheWorst.com.

ABC ““ 8:00 PM: Linus once again puts his faith in false idols with It’s the Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown. This special was originally done in 1974 but for some reason I just don’t remember it, except for Marcie’s egg boiling mishaps.

ABC ““ 10:30 PM: Miss Guided is a sitcom Executive Produced by Ashton Kutcher. I haven’t seen it but it is something new and you can watch the first episode in this sneak peak. Who doesn’t like High School based sitcoms? Uninformed opinion – The Good: Judy Greer, Chris Parnell. The Bad: Brooke Burns.

WEDNESDAY

CBS ““ 8:00 PM: Survivor: Micronesia is on tonight instead of tomorrow because of the NCAA Tournament First Round games. I’m only bringing this up as a public service announcement. I haven’t watched Survivor since America gave Rupert the pity prize.

THURSDAY

ABC ““ 8:00 PM: Miss Guided is back to back tonight. If you liked it Tuesday you are in luck because you get two more episodes and a guest appearance by Ashton Kutcher being very un-Kelso.

ABC ““ 9:00 PM: This is the last new episode of LOST until late April folks, relish it.

CW ““ 9:00 PM: Last week on Reaper Sock was kicked out of his mom’s house. This week he convinces Sam and Ben to move in to a condo together. Next thing you know they’ll be hanging out at the Regal Beagle while avoiding Mr. Furley. Oh yeah, Sam may find out he’s actually been dating Satan’s love child this week. What’s not to watch?

FRIDAY

AMC ““ 8:00 PM & 10:00 PM: Tonight is an interesting night of compare and contrast. At 8 PM you can watch the Eddie Murphy reimagining of Dr. Dolittle and at 10 PM you can watch the 1967 original starring Rex Harrison (who out there knows what a Push Me-Pull You is?). I’ll take the original over the former any day.

CINEMAX ““ 8:00 PM: If you haven’t seen Hot Fuzz and you have Cinemax, tonight you can use it for more than just the late night movies (although the movie’s title may imply that it is of the same ilk). Action films and buddy flicks will never look the same after this.

SATURDAY

ABC ““ 8:00 PM: The yearly showing of Chuck Heston as Moses in The Ten Commandments. In 37 years of life I still haven’t watched it.

A&E ““ 8:00 PM: I absolutely loved The Matrix before its concept was spoiled by the sequels. Come try to relive the magic with me and forget about the other two films.

HIST ““ 8:00 PM: The “British Indiana Jones” explores the appearance and possible location of a certain relic in Quest for the Lost Ark. I thought it was in the Well of Souls, silly me.

SUNDAY

What better way to have a complete Easter Sunday experience than to watch”¦

HIST ““ 8:00 PM: Crucifixion is two hours of knee slapping exploration of crucifixions throughout history, including the most notable, and forensic examination of crucifixion and why the crucified eventually expire. Come for the facts, stay for the laughs.

HIST ““ 10:00 PM: If the previous two hours weren’t your fancy then you HAVE to check out Ax Men. This show, by the same people that made Ice Road Truckers, follows real life loggers in the Pacific Northwest. The show is already two episodes in, but it is a must see.

Comedy Central ““ 8:00 PM: Futurama alert! Tonight the first Direct to DVD Futurama movie is shown in four parts. If you didn’t buy the DVD now is your chance to enjoy some new Futurama after you crash from your chocolate bunny / marshmallow peep sugar high.

There’s what I think are this week’s highlights. Next week I will probably be blathering on about all the things LOST did and didn’t answer (or how it completely confused me).

– Will Wilkins spent more this week to fix his television then he spent on groceries.

Win QI: SERIES B on DVD!

Filed under: Contests — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:00 am

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We’re giving away, in conjunction with Warner Music Entertainment, three (3) copies of QI: SERIES B on DVD.

Having been given the stamp of approval by Ricky Gervais, who stated it’s the show that he’d be really good on”“ the award winning QI is back for a further blast of brilliant banter. The QI team returns with a bunch of Britain’s best comic broadcasts with The ‘B’ Series, the complete second series of award-winning comedy panel quiz with a difference, which arrives on DVD courtesy of Warner Music Entertainment on Monday 17th March.

The new DVD features all twelve 30-minute episodes along with a raft of exclusive DVD extras, including bonus banter, bloopers and buzzers, as once again Ringmaster Stephen Fry towers over the happy chaos as some of the world’s funniest brains including Bill Bailey, Jimmy Carr, Jo Brand, Phill Jupitus, Clive Anderson and Sean Lock answer a bonanza of ingenious and witty questions concerning all things Quite Interesting.

In its quest to conquer the alphabet, QI carries on its wordy adventure into all things B related with host Stephen Fry trying to fiendishly outwit some of Britain’s brilliant brains. Permanently installed guest Alan Davies develops the intellectual counterpoint and as Stephen puts it, “rushes headlong like a puppy into a wall of ignorance.”

As one of the wittiest shows on the box, Quite Interesting or ‘QI’ to its friends, showcases some of the best comedians, writers and broadcasters in the business and with the inimitable and fiendish quiz master Stephen Fry at the helm, who questions the team about all things starting with the letter ‘B’, this two disc DVD promises to be utterly compelling and entertaining viewing.

For more on QI – plus an interview with Stephen Fry – check out our Holiday Havoc spotlight HERE.

***Please Note that this is a REGION 2 DVD set, and requires either a Region 2 or All-Region DVD player***

Contest ends at midnight EST on Monday, March 24th.

CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Monday, March 24th.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 3/17/2008

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:37 am

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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds…

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March 14, 2008

Comics in Context #217: The Next Frontier

Filed under: Columns,Comics in Context — admin @ 2:06 am

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cic2008-03-14.jpgFrom time to time in this column I’ve written about a new school of writing superhero comics that sets itself in opposition to the preponderance of “grim and gritty,” dank and depressing work that seems to dominate the Big Two comics companies nowadays. This new movement is really attempting to revive the positive heroic spirit of the genre from the Silver Age of the late 1950s and 1960s in terms appropriate to the arguably more sophisticated standards of comics of the early 21st century. One of the members of this school, Kurt Busiek, refers to it as the “reconstructionist” movement, as opposed to the “deconstructionist” superhero comics that arose in the 1980s. I’ve called it the “neo-Silver” movement, since it seems to take its inspiration from the classic comics of the Silver Age.

One of the flagships of the “Neo-Silver” movement is writer/artist Darwyn Cooke’s DC Comics miniseries, DC: The New Frontier, which takes the birth of the Silver Age as its subject. At the end of February Warner Brothers Home Video released Justice League: The New Frontier, a direct-to-video animated film adaptation of Cooke’s book.

On one of the DVD’s commentary tracks, Cooke seems understandably ecstatic to witness his creation so faithfully and handsomely translated to the cinematic medium. I’m pleased that so much of the miniseries is now up on screen, but I found myself nonetheless disappointed with this new video version.

As Cooke explains on the commentary track, the requirement of compressing his series into a seventy-minute film meant jettisoning many scenes and characters from the New Frontier comics. As a consultant on the film, Cooke apparently battled to retain certain elements of his original story: for example, if not for his efforts, it seems, Lois Lane wouldn’t have turned up in the film. Still, I think that some of the cuts struck at the heart of what The New Frontier is really all about.

It seems to me that, whether in comics or in animated form, The New Frontier works best for an audience that already has a basic knowledge of the sweep of superhero comics history. People with little knowledge of superhero comics can still follow and appreciate either version, but they won’t fully grasp the underlying backstory. For those who don’t know, let me tell you about it.

In brief, The New Frontier is about the fall and rise of the superhero genre between the late 1940s and the start of the 1960s. In the real world, the superhero genre began with the debut of Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster’s Superman in Action Comics #1 in 1938, as the Great Depression lingered and Europe was about to plunge into World War II. The Man of Steel was an immediate and extraordinary success, and the new genre grew with explosive speed. In 1939 came Batman, at the company now known as DC Comics, the original Captain Marvel at Fawcett, and the Sub-Mariner and the original Human Torch in Marvel Comics #1 at the company then known as Timely. Scores of other new superheroes followed in the early 1940s. At DC Comics there was Wonder Woman, the original versions of the Flash, Green Lantern, Hawkman, and the Atom, as well as Doctor Fate, the Spectre, Wildcat, Hourman, and many more. DC teamed its leading superheroes up as the Justice Society of America in its aptly titled All Star Comics.

The comics industry boomed: in those dark times, the country needed new heroes, in fiction as well as real life, and superhero comics were read not only by the little kids they were presumably aimed at, but also by the young soldiers going off to war. Superman leapt with a mighty bound from the comic books to the comic strips, radio, animated cartoons and live action movie serials. The 1940s was indeed the “Golden Age” of superhero comics, when they achieved a mass popularity that has never been matched since.

But after the war ended, the superheroes’ popularity began to fade quickly. Comics publishers turned to other genres, and one by one the newly created superheroes vanished from print. The Justice Society’s adventures came to an end in 1951, as All Star Comics metamorphosed into All Star Western. The only superheroes at any comics company who survived as the stars of their own comic books throughout the 1950s were DC’s Big Three: Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman.

Meanwhile, having defeated the Axis powers in World War II, America now faced a new threat from its wartime ally, Josef Stalin’s Soviet Union, newly armed with atomic weapons. After spending years fighting enemies abroad, it was as if the United States couldn’t stop itself from looking for yet still more enemies. So in the late 1940s people in government began hunting for subversives and Communists who, they feared, were in league with the Soviets to topple or destroy American democracy. Thus began the era of Senator Joseph McCarthy, his and other Congressional “witch hunts” of Americans who might be secret Soviet sympathizers.

While much of 1950s America was in this inquisitorial frame of mind, Dr. Fredric Wertham wrote his notorious book Seduction of the Innocent, blaming comic books for inspiring juvenile delinquency and even questioning the sexuality of Batman, Robin and Wonder Woman. There were Congressional hearings into the charges against comic books, with the result that most of EC’s line, the most innovative and artistically advanced comic books of the early 1950s, went under, and the comics industry submitted to its own form of self-censorship, the Comics Code, to prevent the government from imposing its own restrictions.

It was Paul Levitz, who is now DC’s president and publisher, who did the first comics story that linked the real life Congressional investigations of the late 1940s and 1950s to the near-extinction of the superhero genre during that same period. In “The Defeat of the Justice Society,” a story Levitz wrote in Adventure Comics #466 (April 1979), the superheroes of the Justice Society appeared before a Congressional committee which demanded that they unmask and reveal their true identities to prove to the American public that they were not subversives. Rather than comply, the members of the Justice Society retired from their superheroic careers. So there was the explanation, in comics continuity, as to why most of DC’s Golden Age superheroes had vanished by the end of 1951.

It might have seemed back then that superheroes were merely a passing fad. But DC editor Julius Schwartz successfully launched a new version of the Flash in Showcase #4 (1956), thereby initiating the great superhero revival of the late 1950s and 1960s, which comics aficionados know as the Silver Age.

Arguably, however, the first Silver Age superhero was really J’onn J’onzz, the Manhunter from Mars, who debuted the year before in a backup story in Detective Comics #225 (November 1955). But J’onn was not originally portrayed as a superhero. Inadvertently transported to Earth by the experimental ray of Dr. Erdel, J’onn (who was not the “little green man” of UFO legend, but a big green humanoid) utilized his shapeshifting abilities to masquerade as an Earthman, John Jones. In his human guise, Jones worked as a detective, turning invisible in order to use his Martian super-powers covertly. Hence, the Manhunter from Mars series was originally a combination of science fiction and the mystery genre. Since the superhero genre, apart from the Big Three, was dead, it seems unlikely that J’onn was originally intended to be a superhero. Only in 1959, after Schwartz had successfully relaunched the superhero genre, did J’onn begin publicly operating as a superhero (see J’onn’s history here).

I’m going to make yet another reference to Danny Fingeroth’s book Disguised as Clark Kent here. Danny shows how the superhero’s secret identity served as a metaphor for Jewish-American comic creators’ efforts to assimilate into American society. So Clark Kent (an alien like J’onn) conceals his Kryptonian ethnicity by posing as an ordinary American-born “mild-mannered reporter.” J’onn went much further literally altering his outward appearance in order to “pass” as a normal Earth human. While Superman would publicly display his Kryptonian powers in his costumed identity, J’onn would initially only employ his Martian powers when he turned invisible, literally out of sight of the majority, who would fear a “Martian invader” in their midst. In New Frontier Cooke showed his recognition of how J’onn J’onzz, hiding his true self so completely from the rest of society, fit into the paranoid, repressed, conformist atmosphere if the 1950s.

In Showcase #4 police scientist Barry Allen was depicted as a fan of the 1940s Flash comics; upon gaining the power of super-speed, he named himself the new Flash after his fictional hero. Years later, Schwartz and writer Gardner Fox had the new Flash travel to a parallel world, “Earth-2,” where the original Flash, Jay Garrick, was a real person. In time they established that the superheroes of the Golden Age lived on Earth-2, while the Silver Age heroes lived on Earth-1. The new versions of the Flash, Green Lantern, Atom and Hawkman joined the Justice League, Earth-1’s counterpart of the Justice Society; Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman were among the founding members of the JLA.

In 1986 DC revised its continuity through the series Crisis on Infinite Earths, which did away with the concept of multiple Earths and established that the Golden Age heroes lived on the same Earth as DC’s modern heroes.

Something else to consider is that, traditionally, comics characters age very slowly or not at all. Superman was introduced in 1938, and yet he remains a young man in the comics today. The Silver Age Green Lantern, Hal Jordan, first appeared in Showcase #22, cover-dated October 1959, and yet he is not depicted in today’s comics as as the senior citizen he would be had he aged in real time. To make Jordan’s youth more credible, no one in contemporary comics stories makes reference to the fact that his origin as a superhero took place during the Eisenhower Administration. Similarly, in a early 1960s story Superman met President John F. Kennedy, but in current continuity, Superman would not even arrive on Earth as a baby until decades later.

In the real world Superman first appeared in comics in 1938, Batman in 1939, and Wonder Woman in 1941, and all three were members of the Justice Society. In current DC continuity, though, they did not begin their superhero careers until roughly a half century later.

This may all have begun to make your heads hurt, but there is still one more step to consider. In New Frontier Darywn Cooke devised his own alternate version of DC Comics continuity. In this version, DC’s Golden and Silver Age heroes all exist on the same Earth. But, with only one exception I can think of offhand, each superhero debuted in the New Frontier timeline at the same time that he or she did in the comics in the real world. Hence, Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman did start their superhero careers in 1938, 1939, and 1941, respectively, in the word of The New Frontier. Arguably, Superman and Wonder Woman’s super-powers keep them from aging normally. But when the story of The New Frontier concludes in 1961, Batman and Lois Lane must be in their forties (though they certainly still look youthful). That one exception, by the way, is Robin, who does not appear in The New Frontier comics or DVD until sometime in the 1950s. If he had debuted in the New Frontier timeline in 1940, as he did in the comics, he would be an adult by the 1950s, and Cooke obviously wanted to use the traditional image of Robin as a “boy wonder” instead.

But the focus of The New Frontier is not on the Big Three, but on the new superheroes who arose during the Silver Age. (Indeed, Cooke’s commentary track on the DVD points out that Superman is kayoed early in the climactic battle at the film’s end so that the Silver Age heroes can take center stage.)

Cooke’s greatest conceptual innovation in The New Frontier is explicitly to turn the Silver Age into a period piece. Instead of presenting the Silver Age heroes as existing in a permanent present day, as comics traditionally have, he instead explicitly sets them in the time period in which their stories first appeared: the 1950s. Cooke presents the Silver Age characters as products of their time. With the perspective that comes with looking back a half century in history, Cooke is able to see how these characters reflect the times of their creation more clearly than, perhaps, their own creators could at the time.

For example, the creators of the Martian Manhunter may not have consciously been aware of how the character–a green-skinned alien disguised as a human in order to live on Earth–was a response to the racism and paranoia of 1950s American society, but Cooke sees it and consciously works with the theme.

So the premise of The New Frontier is fairly complicated for a casual reader of comics, or a viewer of the video whose knowledge of DC superheroes may be restricted to the movie versions, to understand.

Let’s turn now to the video. Watching the opening, I was immediately delighted by the use of a familiar old device–an animated artist’s brush, seemingly wielded by an offscreen artist, which creates the pictures onscreen. One sees something similar at the start of Max and Dave Fleischer’s Out of the Inkwell cartoons, but New Frontier‘s animated brush specifically evokes the artist’s brush that appears onscreen in various classic Disney animated films. (I describe one example, All the Cats Join In, in “Comics in Context” #136: “Before There Were Cars“). It’s a lovely homage to a grand tradition.

In the context of The New Frontier DVD, though, the animated brush doesn’t belong to the artists creating the film, but to an offscreen character in the story, a children’s illustrator who has undergone mental possession by the film’s principal menace, a primeval intelligence called the Center (or The Centre, since the film also employs the British spelling). The offscreen illustrator sets down a warning about the Center in his book, and then, still off camera, shoots himself. This is presumably meant to be a shock effect, but I was only a wee bit startled. Not having gotten to know or even see the illustrator within these first few moments of the film, it was hard to feel anything for him.

As for the Center, I’m afraid he leaves a gaping hole where the story’s ultimate villain should be. In the opening of the film we hear the Center’s voice drone on ominously about how he has existed for millions upon millions of years and is determined to eliminate these human newcomers to the planet. But we’ve seen this sort of thing before: for example, H. P. Lovecraft’s elder gods. There’s nothing distinctive about the Center, whether in his motivation, his powers, his personality–or, rather, lack of same–or even his visual representation. when the center finally appears towards the end of the film, he looks like a gigantic and rather drab floating rock with giant pterodactyls, of all things, roosting on top.

In The New Frontier, it is in order to combat the Center that the new Silver Age heroes team up with the Big Three to become the Justice League. Subsequently, the film shows us a shot of the JLA battling Starro the Conqueror, which aficionados will recognize as based on the cover of the comic with the Justice League’s first published adventure, The Brave and the Bold #28 in 1960. You may think of Starro as silly: after all, he looks like a gigantic alien starfish. But that cover shot of the JLA struggling against the monstrous Starro is both memorable and iconic. (And it suddenly strikes me that the cover for Fantastic Four #1, with its heroes struggling against another huge monster, which appeared the following year, is very much like it! Why not, since the FF were allegedly created as Marvel’s response to the Justice League?) In the Silver Age Julie Schwartz and his artists had a knack for concocting just such amazing visual imagery. The Center just isn’t in the same league. The Center does not hold.

During the opening credits for the New Frontier video, we see a newspaper headline announcing the retirement of the Golden Age superheroes and see an image of them trudging away in defeat. We then see a shot of the police pursuing Hourman. Readers of the original comics version will recall that superheroes became outlaws unless they revealed their true identities to the government and took loyalty oaths. Hourman refused either to comply or to retire, and this police chase ended in his untimely death. (This is sharply different from the canonical DC continuity, in which the original Hourman also retired at the end of the Golden Age and resumed his superhero career when the Justice Society reemerged during the Silver Age. But do people who watch the DVD without having read the comics recognize Hourman or understand that he was killed before Superman says so later in the film? )

All of this is treated at greater length in the comics version, primarily through text pieces, like newspaper coverage of the events. Darwyn Cooke explains on the DVD that due to time limitations the filmmakers covered these events through these images in the credit sequence and through a subsequent scene which Cooke wrote in which Superman and Lois Lane discuss the Justice Society’s enforced retirement. But these brief images and references to the end of the Golden Age heroes are not the same as dramatizing it onscreen.

The New Frontier comics series begins at the end of World War II, with DC’s team of military heroes, the Losers, on “Dinosaur Island,” the setting of one of DC’s wackiest war series, The War That Time Forgot. There is a reference to Dinosaur Island in the video, and I suppose that’s where the pterodactyls at the end came from, but I don’t mind that this opening sequence from the comics is missing from the film.

But I think that the film needed a sequence, however brief, to establish that there had been a Golden Age of superheroes. Those who are unacquainted with comics history needed to know a little more about it, and, indeed, need to know that that’s when Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman debuted. (If you don’t know superhero comics history, you might think from the film that Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman first appeared in the 1950s, just as the Barry Allen Flash did.) Moreover, in dramatic terms, if the story begins with the fall of the superheroes and the end of the Golden Age, then we should see a glimpse of that Golden Age and its glories onscreen, in order to feel the sense of loss when it comes to an end. Perhaps the precredit sequence would have better been devoted to showing the Justice Society in action.

Perhaps because the graphic novel devotes more space to the fall of the Golden Age, it takes on resonances that are absent from the DVD. Today, a situation in which superheroes are outlaws unless they reveal their true identities to the government not only harkens back to the McCarthy era but becomes an echo of Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons’ landmark series Watchmen. Superman, who is allowed to continue to operate because he submitted to the government’s demands, is in the position of Moore and Gibbons’ Dr. Manhattan, while Batman, who daringly defies the law by acting as a vigilante, mirrors Watchmen‘s Rorschach. In The New Frontier DVD it’s not clear that Batman is operating outside the law; indeed, he shows up at the end to aid the government and no one even mentions he’s a lawbreaker.

Furthermore, in reading the New Frontier comics’ account of what Batman and Superman did when the government lowered the boom on superheroes, I was inevitably reminded of Frank Miller’s Batman: The Dark Knight Returns, another tale in which superheroes have been banned. In The New Frontier DVD Superman mentions that he had to take a “loyalty oath” to continue his superheroic career in America. The DVD does not examine or even seem to notice the moral ambiguity of Superman’s decision. Readers of The Dark Knight Returns know that Batman–and Miller-regard Superman as a sellout for working with a federal government that had driven the other superheroes into enforced retirement. In The New Frontier DVD there is only an oblique reference to the fact that Batman and Superman are on opposite sides of this issue, when Batman ominously notes that he keeps kryptonite on hand in case he needs to use it against the Kryptonian.

Watching the DVD, I realized that The New Frontier is the direct opposite of Marvel’s Civil War. New Frontier clearly indicates that the government is wrong to attempt to control or outlaw the superheroes, who become representatives of individual freedom. The suppression of the superheroes becomes a metaphor for the blacklisting of the McCarthy era. Superman is one of the few “scabs.” In Civil War half of America’s superheroes are not only scabs, siding with the government in its insistence on officially registering superheroes and learning their true identities; they are also strikebreakers, battling their former comrades. Captain America leads the other superheroes in opposing the government’s demands. But in the concluding issue we are led to believe that the public sides with the government; majority rule overrides individual freedom, and Cap and his faction surrender, effectively acquiescing in the idea that they were wrong. (And then Cap gets shot.) With the triumphal emergence of a new generation of superheroes. At the end of the story, The New Frontier extols the superhero as symbol of individual liberty. In contrast, Civil War has an ending that would make McCarthy and the 1950s House Un-American Activities Committee happy.

Perhaps in the DVD when Superman is encouraged to take a leadership role, it is intended as a subtle reproach to his acquiescence to the government, and he indeed rises to the occasion later in the film. As for the rest of the Big Three, I concur with Cooke in his praise (on the commentary track) of the animation of a sequence in which a particularly spooky Batman singlehandedly and believably overcomes a gang of sinister Center cultists, one by one.

The big scene with Superman encountering Wonder Woman in 1950s Indochina, adapted from the graphic novel, is another matter. Wonder Woman has encouraged a group of oppressed Indochinese women to kill their tormentors, celebrates with them afterwards, and defiantly defends her actions to the disapproving Superman. This reminds me of the man-hating Wonder Woman of Frank Miller’s All Star Batman and Wonder Woman recently killing the traitorous Maxwell Lord in canonical continuity. These stories’ writers are presumably drawing on the fact that Wonder Woman is a member of an ancient warrior culture of Amazons. But traditionally Wonder Woman has always been an advocate of peace, even if she has to use force to stop wrongdoers. How can she object to the violence and brutality of “man’s world” when she applauds women who resort to blood vengeance? Wonder Woman is not Xena or Red Sonja. I recognize Superman and Batman in New Frontier, but not Cooke’s version of Wonder Woman.

And I just do not comprehend why Cooke put the Flash’s longtime foe, Captain Cold, in such an uninspired costume, which makes him look like a medieval monk wearing 3-D glasses. You can’t beat Carmine Infantino’s classic costume design for Captain Cold. If Cooke has the Flash wear his sleek and stylish Infantino-designed costume, why couldn’t he let the Captain wear his? Ah well, at least the Captain got to wear his proper costume when he turned up in the Justice League unlimited animated series. And despite the fashion victimization, Cooke’s battle between the Flash and Captain Cold in Las Vegas is even better in the animated film. Iris, well, quite a rush to see the Flash moving at super-speed directly at the Captain, only to be halted at the last second when the Captain shouts “Stop!” in warning. It’s lucky for the members of Flash’s Rogues Gallery that in comics the writers and artists can manipulate time: otherwise they would be hard pressed to pull the trigger before the onrushing Flash got to them.

As in the graphic novel, the DVD’s initial sequence with Hal Jordan, who is to become the Silver Age Green Lantern, is set on the final day of the Korean War. Though the war is over, Jordan finds himself forced to kill an attacking Korean soldier in order to save his own life. The purpose of the scene is much clearly and much more strongly conveyed in the comics, however. In Cooke’s graphic novel Jordan is adamantly opposed to killing for any reason. I find it hard to believe that a man with such an attitude would be assigned to fly a combat plane. Shouldn’t Jordan have been a conscientious objector and been assigned some duty in which he was not expected to kill the enemy? In the comics presumably Jordan’s killing of the North Korean in self-defense is to show him learning that violence can be necessary. However, in the film Jordan is not clearly established as a pacifist, so the point of the sequence is blunted. I’m still puzzled as to why Cooke wanted to make Jordan a pacifist and why he felt the need to put this future hero through such a brutal killing, as if it were an initiation into the use of violence. Other heroes in the series, like the Flash, don’t go through this sort of bloody initiation into violence.

Another thing I like about The New Frontier comics is that Cooke presents Hal Jordan as a representative of the daring, pioneering test pilots and astronauts that Tom Wolfe wrote about in his book The Right Stuff. Again, presumably because of the necessity of condensing Cooke’s books, this comes across more explicitly in the comics. In the DVD Jordan seems to be more of a lone star, not a member of a generation of heroic pioneers in air and space.

But it is just wonderful for a Silver Age fan like myself to see the iconic origin of Green Lantern, as the dying alien Abin Sur passes his power ring on to the man he has singled out to be his successor, Hal Jordan, animated on screen: a classic scene from the comics that retains its power today.

The characters who make the biggest impression in The New Frontier DVD are Jordan and the Martian Manhunter. I like nearly everything that Cooke and the animation team do with J’onn J’onnz in the book and the film, portraying him as a humane alien forced to hide his true identity from a hostile world. In both versions there is an entertaining scene in which J’onn watches television to learn about his new world, shapeshifting into doubles of the personalities he sees on the tube, including Bugs Bunny and Groucho Marx, as if trying out identities. Eventually he settles on becoming a detective like those he sees on TV. It’s a perceptive acknowledgment that in the comics of the 1950s J’onn J’onzz was not so much acting as a real detective as adopting the media image of a detective from TV and the movies. Thus we can now see that the early Manhunter from Mars stories of the 1950s reflected the genre now known as film noir, which expressed the anxieties and fears of that decade. The literal darkness of the scenes involving the Martian Manhunter in both versions of New Frontier thus likewise reflects the noir visual style.

The plight of the green-skinned Martian Manhunter is a metaphor for racism in 1950s American society. In the comics Cooke devised a subplot to reinforce that theme, depicting an African-American superhero named John Henry (after the hero of folklore) who is eventually murdered by bigots. On the DVD John Henry’s saga is briefly recapped in a television news report. It’s good that the filmmakers included this, but once again, I wish there had been the time and budget to dramatize it. This is yet another reason why anyone who sees and enjoys the New Frontier DVD should make a point of reading the original comics to find out the whole story.

Cooke titled his series The New Frontier after the celebrated line in John F. Kennedy’s speech accepting the Democratic nomination for President in 1960. The first member of his new generation who would become President, Kennedy declared that “We stand at the edge of a New Frontier – the frontier of unfulfilled hopes and dreams. It will deal with unsolved problems of peace and war, unconquered pockets of ignorance and prejudice, unanswered questions of poverty and surplus.” “The New Frontier” was the name given to the programs that Kennedy proposed to deal with these problems, just as President Franklin D. Roosevelt had put forth “the New Deal” to combat the effects of the Great Depression.

In his original comics series, Cooke ran Kennedy’s “New Frontier” speech alongside images of the newly formed Justice League and the myriad new superheroes who arose to populate DC’s Silver Age in the late 1950s and 1960s. It is a triumphant, inspirational coda to Cooke’s epic tale, and the film heightens its impact by putting Kennedy himself (or someone doing a masterful impression of him) delivering his “New Frontier” speech on the soundtrack while the montage of Silver Age superheroes fills the screen. Thus Cooke makes the key point of his series: that the rebirth of the superhero genre in the Silver Age reflects, and acts as a metaphor for the birth of a new idealistic, activist spirit in American politics and culture in the 1960s.

At one point in his DVD commentary track, Cooke remarks that the events depicted in the film (obviously aside from the presence of superheroes) resemble those if the present day. I wish that he had gone into detail about this. It has been said that any movie that is set in a period of the past is really also about the period in which it was made. (Hence, Gone with the Wind, though set during the Civil War and Reconstruction, also reflects the racial and sexual attitudes of 1939.) Cooke is acknowledging that this is true about The New Frontier.

The Golden Age of Comics was born during the Great Depression, with the world on the brink of World War II. These first superheroes seem to embody the positive, can-do American spirit that lay behind FDR’s New Deal, that enabled the nation to rise out of economic misery, to defeat the Axis threat abroad, and to become, yes, one of the world’s postwar “superpowers.”

As Cooke shows, the New Frontier and the Silver Age also emerged from a dark, troubled time in American politics and society, involving a war (in Korea) and restrictions on civil liberties, and embodied the will and desire to bring about change.

It was during these two periods–the late 1930s and 1940s, and the late 1950s and 1960s–that the superhero genre experienced its most explosive growth, giving rise to pantheons of characters who have now achieved classic status. In the forty years since we have not witnessed any comparable burst of creativity. For example, it has been said that the last truly iconic superhero created at Marvel was Wolverine, back in 1974! There was a great period for the genre in the mid-1980s, but in the “deconstructionist” mode of Watchmen and Dark Knight.

Now, America is again in a dark period, mired in an endless war, plunging into recession, headed by an administration that employs torture and violates civil liberties. Yet in 2008 Presidential candidates, both Democratic and Republican, have been promising “change,” a passion to reform what has gone wrong in our society. At this point the two remaining Democratic contenders each represent an element of society–women and African-Americans–who were previously barred by prejudice from holding positions as powerful as the Presidency. And one if them, Barack Obama, has taken as his theme “the audacity of hope,” representing a new spirit of optimism and liberal activism.

Is this another time, like the 1940s and 1960s, that could revitalize the superhero genre? Indeed, has this rebirth already happened in the movies, with the ceaseless wave of superhero movies during this first decade of a new century? But what path will the superhero genre take in the comics? Will it remained stuck in the grim and gritty, the dismal and despairing, with series like Identity Crisis and Civil War, undercutting the heroic spirit, siding with oppression, unable to advance into a new, brighter day? Or will comics creators follow Darwyn Cooke on the path he sets out in The New Frontier: into a newer frontier for the 21st century?

LINKS IN THE GREAT CYBERCHAIN OF BEING

If Darwyn Cooke is a practitioner of the Neo-Silver Age school of comics, then Dave Stevens created a Neo-Golden Age masterpiece in The Rocketeer, his gorgeously illustrated adventure series set in the late 1930s. Stevens passed away this week, and you should read the tribute to him by his friend Mark Evanier.

There have also been remarkable tributes online to the late Steve Gerber, and I encourage you to read those by his former Marvel colleagues and friends Peter Gillis and Steven Grant and Heidi MacDonald’s reminiscences about the man and his work.

–Copyright 2008 Peter Sanderson

Comics & Comics: And Bats, Oh my!

Filed under: Columns,Comics and Comics — admin @ 12:04 am

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Howdy Inter-Webbers. I’m Matt Cohen. And I dig Batman.

Hellboy and Green Arrow may be my all time faves, but for some reason I have always identified the most with good ole’ bats (which is odd, because I come from a great, happy family which is very much not murdered). I think that is part of the appeal to Batman though, the fact that any man, woman or child could “Technically” do what Bruce does. He’s hasn’t got amazing powers. He hasn’t been sent from some distant planet. He’s not infallible, like his boring buddy Clark. Batman is basically a brooding teenager who decided to get pro-active (not the acne medicine) and everyone can relate to that at some point in their life. And though the baddies might change, and the cowl may shift every few years, Batman will always remain, and I, for one, will be in the passenger seat of the Batmobile until Bruce kicks me out.

This week, Comics & Comics is extremely proud to present, a special guest piece written by my friend and yours, Mr. Jesse Letourneau, simply entitled “Batman”.

But first, as always, lets take a quick peek through this week’s new release shelf a bit, shall we?

Spoiler Alerts Ahead

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DC

Booster Gold # 7: Geoff Johns and Jeff Katz continue to present one of the funniest, sharpest and most interesting comic in mainstream books today, with the latest issue of Booster Gold. Finally, the much awaited reunion of Blue and Gold (Booster Gold and The Blue Beetle) is upon us and it certainly didn’t disappoint. This issue finds Michael and the freshly resurrected Ted Kord dealing with the time-stream issues creating by Boosters jaunt into the past to save his best friend. And though this issue, like the others in the run, can get kind of heavy handed on all the time science speak sometimes, the sheer likableness of Booster and Skeets (and now Ted) pulls the reader in. Throw in some OMACS, a new multiverse planet to explore and a cool splash page with Green Arrow and Hawkboy, and you’ve got another very good issue of what is shaping up to be a must read series.

Salvation Run # 5 This book is bad ass. I know, not the most eloquent of reviews, but very true when talking about my current favorite book in comics, Salvation Run. The concept was simple enough, send most of the worlds super villains to an uninhabited planet and let them fend for themselves. The execution of the book however, is something to not be missed. With a cast of villains, the reader is finally “allowed” to root for their favorite baddie, without feeling those pangs of guilt for supporting killers, lunatics and talking gorillas (R.I.P Grodd). In the fifth issue of the series there is no less action nor laughs then in the previous stellar issues. With the stakes getting quickly ramped up (Jon Jonz anyone?) and the “baddies” resorting to dirtier and more vile means, Salvation Run is a unfettered view into the life of a D.C rogue, complete with all the murder, betrayal and cheesey one liners that come with it. The last page of this book promises the finale to be nothing less then epic. Awesome read.

Notable: Green Arrow and Black Canary # 6, JLA Classified # 54

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MARVEL

X-Factor # 29: Jamie Madrox is pissed. And with good reason. He “abandoned” friend and teammate Layla Miller in the future, there are marauders attacking him from every angle, and his love life is in shambles. Also, he’s a father to be (With Siryn) and has absolutely no idea. This issue finds the folks at X-Factor Investigations at a turning point. The team split up, Mutant Town in shambles and no real idea as to who is orchestrating the demise of the X-Factor. Peter David continues to script an excellent book, even throwing some unexpected curve’s this week when the series went “Cosmic” for a panel or two. (That crazy Rictor) and then got all horror movie on our collective asses. This book is week in and out a rich, engrossing and increasingly filmic read, and if you haven’t jumped on board yet, now would be a great time. On a side note, the last panel of the issue is worth the price alone, but I wont spoil it here. Tis a good’un though.

Avengers the Initiative # 10: The cover image says it all. “One Will Die!”. With a hook like that, it was hard not to be excited to read the current issue of “The Initiative” (also, I’m a sucker for SlapStick). Well, that title hint turned out to be kind of a cop-out, but luckily the issue is most definitely the best of the series so far, and quite frankly one of the better issues I’ve read of any title in a few months. The action is as ramped up as it can be for the entire book, with former team leader M.V.P now dead and seeking his revenge against the initiative under the clever handle K.I.A. This issue is pretty much a giant brawl between K.I.A and his ex teammates and what a brawl it is. Gauntlet, whom I never really took a shine to comes into his own in this issue as a hardcore hero, and I for one would love to see the ensuing fight between him and K.I.A animated one day, because it had such a great visual quality to it. The last panel is a fun surprise and anytime Steve gets to use his hammer I’m a happy camper. Excellent issue.

Notable: Last Defenders # 1, Nova V.4 #11, Thunderbolts # 119, Punisher MAX # 55

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And now, without further ado, Jesse Letourneau presents,

“Batman”

Frank Miller dubbed him the Dark Knight. Kids’ WB calls him simply “The.” Since its debut in 2004, Kids’ WB’s The Batman has depicted the adventures of the Caped Crusader to mixed reviews. Last Saturday (March 8) saw the show’s end. This week we will look back at what they got right and what they got wrong. (I believe the Joker is something they got right.)

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Before we look at what the series has done right, let’s address some concerns.

It’s not as good as the original. The most common complaint of the show is that it is not as good as Batman: The Animated Series which aired from 1992-1995. Guess what. It’s not.

The work that came from Paul Dini (author of Quick Stop’s very own Monkey Talk), Bruce Timm and many others, was a masterpiece. Taking the very best of the character’s history and infusing it with their own style, those that worked on Batman: The Animated Series (BTAS) created what many (myself included) believe to be the best version of Batman ever put on film. However, just because a better version exists, does not mean that The Batman does not hold its own as a valid and entertaining edition to the Batman mythos

It is just a kids’ show designed to sell toys. It is unfair to dismiss The Batman simply because its primary audience is children. The Batman is indeed a kid oriented show designed in part to sell plastic heroes and villains. However, there have been many shows in the past that were conceived primarily as half hour commercials. He-Man, G.I. Joe, and TMNT were all shows designed to sell toys and comics. That doesn’t mean they were a complete waste of time.

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The re-imagined villains are horrid. Many argue that the villains of The Batman are the worst part of the show. I am inclined to agree. Personally, I don’t care for the show’s interpretation of the Riddler, Poison Ivy, Clayface, Mr. Freeze, and Killer Croc. However, most of these villains took a back seat in the later seasons.

Those who tried it during the first two and half seasons (the series weakest efforts) and then gave up on the series missed out. Those who stayed with the show witnessed the animation, stories, and characterizations improve. Despite all its faults, The Batman is worth checking out.

In order to appreciate The Batman, we have to know what makes the character work. In my opinion there are three elements needed to have Batman at his absolute best. Bruce Wayne (Batman’s alter ego) must face tragedy, protect Gotham, and have the balancing influence of Robin to be the best Batman he can be. I propose that the animated series has all these elements, and is fine interpretation of the character and his world.

The death of Batman’s parents is the lynchpin that made him into the hero he is today. Being an orphan is nothing unique in the four colored world of superheroes. Both Superman and Spider-Man grew up not knowing their parents. Yet Batman is not simply an alien estranged from his heritage or a teen who lost his father figure.

Batman lacks the love and support enjoyed by other heroes (Super-Man and the Kents, Spider-Man and Aunt May). Taking nothing away from the catastrophes in the lives of these two heroes, young Bruce faced one of life’s most traumatic experiences. He was subjected to witnessing the murder of both his parents. His childhood was cut short. Light and joy were not comforts Bruce had has he grew up. It is the figurative shadows of loss that gave birth to the man who now waits in the literal shadows.

The Batman while geared for kids still addresses the reality of Bruce’s loss of his parents.
While certainly not the show’s focus, the death of the Wayne’s has not been retconned away or ignored. A recurring element of the series is a picture of young Bruce and his parents taken shortly before their murder. It is not uncommon to find an episode opening or closing with Bruce meditating on this photo, recalling why he persists in his fight against crime.

Young Bruce filled the loss of his parents not only with darkness and shadows, but with purpose. Bruce’s parents loved and served the city of Gotham. They gave of their wealth, they gave of their time, and they led by example. Yet, as far as Bruce is concerned, it was the city itself that murdered his parents. Batman’s purpose is to make Gotham into the city his parents envisioned it could be.

Bruce has found a way to serve the city. Batman fights the elements that seek to corrupt Gotham. He battles the elements that seek to destroy his city. In protecting Gotham, Bruce protects the memory of his parents. If only he could cause the city to live up to the vision of his parents, then maybe the darkness will leave the heart of little Bruce Wayne. Maybe then Batman could find peace.

The season four episode Artifacts, perfectly demonstrates Batman’s commitment to protect Gotham. Wikipedia describes the story as filled with references to current comic continuity as well as the Frank Miller work The Dark Knight Returns. While both elements are present, Artifacts stands on its own as arguably the best episode of the series. I believe it could even hold its own along side the work of BTAS.

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The episode is set in two different times. The near future, where we see Batman defeating Mr. Freeze; and the far-future, where Batman is gone, and Mr. Freeze has found a way to not only survive but cripple the city in his icy grip. Hope is not lost. The Gotham City police send a team to uncover the legendary Bat Cave. It is there they find information and resources, left behind by Batman, to defeat Mr. Freeze. Even from the after life the Batman fights one last battle to save Gotham.

To counter the darkness and focus the purpose, Batman needs a balance. I am not a fan of kid sidekicks; however Robin is one of the few who work well. He is not a clone of his mentor in either powers or costume. Robin’s origin is similar, but his goals are different. Robin’s purpose is to serve the greater good, and to enjoy his work while doing so.

Robin isn’t bent on vengeance like his adult teammate. He represents for Batman not only the light to his darkness, but the lost childhood of Bruce Wayne. Robin is the one who reminds Batman that the fight for truth and justice has value in itself, and that the work can be fun. Robin is the one who keeps Batman from tipping over the edge and becoming the very thing he fights.

The Batman’s version of Robin is a pitch perfect interpretation of the character. While old school purist will miss the bare legs and pixie boots of Robin’s original costume from the comic books, everything else that makes Dick Grayson work as a character is present. Robin brings humor, joy, and the knowledge of youth (one villain is caught, due to Robin’s contact with him via on-line gaming) to Batman and the series.

However, I hear my fellow fanboys screaming at their computers, “A hero is only as good as his villains, and the new Joker looks like a purple and green gorilla.”

DREADS
1989 2008
“Where did you get those wonderful dreads?”

I will grant you that the visual interpretation of the Joker is not the most pleasing version ever put on film. Yet, if you can look past the physical redesign you will find that the core of the character still exists. I will go so far as to say the characterization of the Joker is nearly flawless in his appearances on The Batman.

What makes a compelling Joker? Insanity, mayhem, and an unhealthy preoccupation on Batman are the key elements that make the Joker the best arch nemesis he can be. The Batman’s interpretation has these elements in spades.

The series introduces the Joker as newly escaped from Arkham Asylum and still barefoot and in his straight jacket. This first meeting between the Joker and Batman involves a blimp full of Joker gas. Joker’s plans are to expose all of Gotham to his deadly invention. Of course good wins the day, and the Joker is thwarted. From that point on, the Joker’s new goal is to take down the Batman. This episode, titled The Bat in the Belfry is the shows premier episode. Right from the beginning audiences were treated to an insane Joker carrying out capers of mayhem, and developing his unhealthy preoccupation of the Batman.

This complete interpretation of the Clown Prince of Crime is carried all the way to the end of the series. The shows final episodes deal with the story threads of Batman and his newly acquired super friends established at the end of season four. Episode Sixty-Two of Sixty-Five (The End of The Batman) gives us one last look at the rivalry between Joker and Batman. There is a new dynamic duo in Gotham, Wrath and Scorn who aid villains in their crimes. The Joker is outraged that anyone would come to Gotham and try to upstage him. Even when the new criminals learn the secret identities of Batman and Robin, the Joker is unimpressed. Posing as the police, Joker picks up the defeated Wrath and Scorn, and before they can tell a sole who lies behind Batman’s cowl, he exposes them to a diluted dose of Joker gas. He gives them just enough to cause them to go insane, and thus discredit their newfound knowledge. As the Joker drives off he makes it clear that if anyone is going to undo the Batman it will be him.

Much like the series itself, the Joker of BTAS is seen by many (myself included) as the best Joker ever put on film. However, I applaud the creators of The Batman for not simply creating a carbon copy of a character we have seen numerous times before. Instead they had the courage to radically reinterpret the Joker, without loosing the core of what makes him a great character.

The early seasons of The Batman have their ups and down, while season four and five stand on their own as interesting and satisfying additions to the mythos of Batman.

I would like to thank Matty and the crew at Quick Stop Entertainment for allowing me a chance to share some of my ideas with all of you.

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Jesse, you complete me”¦

Check back next week for a look at the comedy scene around Los Angeles. I’m new here, figure its time I threw myself in headfirst and faceforward (ouch.) The following week, Ill take you behind the scenes of the upcoming “Wizard World Los Angeles” comic convention, to tell you all about the good, the bad, and the Bendis. (I kid, but lose those damn thought bubbles!). See ya later, genetically enhanced alligators.

And as always,

“Keep em’ bagged and boarded”

–Matt Cohen is currently watching Uatu. Take that, ya perve!

Weekend Shopping Guide 3/14/08: Savior Of The Universe

Filed under: Shopping Guides — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:03 am

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The weekend’s here. You’ve just been paid, and it’s burning a hole in your pocket. What’s a pop culture geek to do? In hopes of steering you in the right direction to blow some of that hard-earned cash, it’s time for the Quick Stop Weekend Shopping Guide – your spotlight on the things you didn’t even know you wanted…

Although I’m sure the full season set will be out by the fall featuring the episodes, I can still recommend the South Park: Imaginationland disc (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$19.99 SRP) for its uncut versions of the trilogy, as well as the near full-length audio commentary with Matt Stone and Trey Parker (a rarity since their decision to only do mini-commentaries). The disc also contains the bonus episodes “Woodland Critter Christmas” and “Manbearpig”.

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Forced to choose sides in the great Oscar battle between There Will Be Blood and No Country For Old Men (Miramax, Rated R, DVD-$29.99 SRP), my immediate choice was for the Coen Brothers atmospheric amorality tale that harkens back to the duo’s noirish Blood Simple roots. Josh Brolin stars as a man who makes the unfortunate decision to walk away with the money he finds in a pickup truck at a bloody crime scene, setting off a series of unfortunate events that left me glued to the edge of my seat as the action and consequences just kept escalating. Bonus features include a trio of behind-the-scenes featurettes.

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Michael Palin continues his globe-spanning journeys with a trip a little closer to home – and yet worlds away – in Michael Palin: New Europe (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$49.98 SRP). Exploring the area formerly situated behind the Iron Curtain, he finds a cultural explosion that mixes both the modern west and a more traditional identity. The 3-disc box set features an interview with Palin and deleted scenes.

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I so very much wanted to like the remake of the manly tete a tete Sleuth (Sony, Rated R, DVD-$26.96 SRP), starring Jude Law and Michael Caine (in the role opposite of the one he played in the original) as a pair of men fighting an escalating battle of wits over a woman. Sadly, Kenneth Branagh’s direction feels merely like a stageplay statically brought to screen, and it mostly leaves the actors – who are largely on their game – out in the cold. Bonus features include audio commentaries, a behind-the-scenes featurette, and a look at the make-up effects.

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Based on Steve Purcell’s underground comic – and inspiration for a fantastic series of video games – Sam & Max: Freelance Police (Shout Factory, Not Rated, DVD-$29.99 SRP) gets a feature-laden DVD release of the complete short-lived series. The 3-disc set also features a conversation with Purcell, a trio of animated shorts, a new animated short, a look at Telltale Games, the original series bible, and a playable demo of their latest video game adventure.

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It’s not Pixar, but Jerry Seinfeld’s Bee Movie (Dreamworks, Rated PG, DVD-$36.98 SRP) is as affably goofy as Seinfeld himself. In what is essentially a goofy tale of the secret life of bees through the eyes of Barry B. Benson, the laughs are a bit uneven, but you can certainly feel Jerry’s comedy all over it. And, thankfully, the animation is better than Dreamworks’s previous standard, the Shrek franchise, and is on par with the decent-looking Over The Hedge. The 2-disc set features audio commentary, alternate endings and lost scenes, behind-the-scenes featurettes, music videos, and more.

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If you’re hoping to regain sight and sanity after the recent “reinvention” of the Jay Ward nostalgia-classic George Of The Jungle (Classic Media, Not Rated, DVD-$19.95 SRP), look no further than the 2-disc set collecting all 17 episodes of that original series – complete with the supporting features Super Chicken and Tom Slick. Also included is the never-before-seen pilot episode.

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After the abomination that was Evan Almighty, it would take a film to rejuvenate my view of Steve Carrell’s once-promising film career. Thankfully, he made a nice little flick like Dan In Real Life (Touchstone, Rated PG-13, DVD-$29.99 SRP). Carrell stars as an advice columnist and single father of three who awkwardly finds that he’s fallen in love with his brother’s new girlfriend. It’s a likeable little comedy that doesn’t try to be more than it is. Bonus features include an audio commentary, deleted scenes, behind-the-scenes featurettes, and outtakes.

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It’s like a watched pot, but ever so slowly we’re getting more seasons of the Britcom classic One Foot In The Grave with the release of seasons three and four (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$34.98 SRP each). The 2-disc sets contain an additional 6 episodes each, following the hilarious life struggles of retiree Victor Meldrew (Richard Wilson). Bonus features include Christmas specials and a pair of audio commentaries.

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Get your Al Pacino catalogue fix with a pair of from the vaults releases – And Justice For All and Bobby Deerfield (Sony, Rated R/PG, DVD-$19.94 SRP each). The former finds Pacino as a race car driver under the direction of Sydney Pollack, while the latter is a Norman Jewison flick with Pacino as an idealistic young lawyer under pressure to defend a man he knows is guilty. Bonus materials on Justice include an audio commentary, interviews with Jewison and screenwriter Barry Levinson, deleted scenes, and an episode of Damages.

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Reading through the best-of collection for the legendary comics fanzine Alter Ego (Twomorrows, $21.95 SRP) – edited by Roy Thomas & Bill Schelly and featuring an introduction by the late Julius Schwartz – is like wading into a geeky time capsule. This volume collects the first 11 issues of the fanzine, which launched in 1961.

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Dora and Boots have brought together a toe-tapping collection sure to be on constant repeat in the CD and mp3 players of anyone with kids, ¡Vamos a bailer! Let’s Dance!: Dora The Explorer’s Music Collection (Nickelodeon, $29.98 SRP). The 3-disc set features the original Dora CD, as well as Dora Dance Fiesta! and Dora’s World Adventure!, as well as some interactive board games in the fold-out packaging.

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Not content to let Dora venture out alone this weekend, there’s also a brand new Diego release – Go Diego Go!: Moonlight Rescue (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$16.99 SRP) involving baby sea turtles, rain forests, and Rhea.

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Stargate fans still smarting over the show’s cancellation can wrap up the Ori saga with the direct-to-DVD Stargate: The Ark Of Truth (MGM/UA, Not Rated, DVD-$26.98 SRP), which picks up right were the series left off. Bonus features include an audio commentary and a trio of featurettes.

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Clearly a reaction to her Oscar win last year, the Helen Mirren At The BBC set (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$79.98 SRP) is still a welcome release of productions done over the course of her 40-year career for the Brit broadcaster. The 5-disc set features The Changeling, The Apple Cart, Caesar and Claretta, The Philanthropist, The Little Minister, The Country Wife, Blue Remembered Hills, Mrs. Reinhardt, & Soft Targets. Bonus materials include a new interview with Mirren and a Michael Parkinson interview from 1975.

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Watching the episodes on the second volume of Love American Style‘s first season (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$35.98 SRP) is like peering into a time capsule at what TV thought courtship in the late 60’s was all about. Considered risqué at the time, it’s now fascinatingly quaint. The 3-disc set features the remaining 12 episodes of season one… And lots of innuendo.

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I’d say anime fans probably already have their copies of Appleseed Ex Machina (Warner Bros., Rated Pg-13, DVD-$34.98 SRP) already on order. Maybe that’s because an anime produced by John Woo doesn’t often come down the pike. Bonus materials include a featurette on the creation of the movie, a look at the animation technology used in the film, and an audio commentary.

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Get your Tom Baker Doctor fix with a pair of new classic Doctor Who releases – Planet Of Evil & Destiny Of The Daleks (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$24.98 SRP each). As usual with these Doctor Who discs, they’re much like the Tardis – far more loaded with extras than a similar release of this size, including commentaries, documentaries, featurettes, trailers, galleries, and more.

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It’s always a disappointing exercise to watch the recently produced cartoons featured in the fourth volume of Tom & Jerry Tales (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$14.98 SRP), particularly if you have any affection for the old MGM cat and mouse-capades. This volume features 12 more installments from the Kids’ WB show.

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Completely inoffensive and largely forgettable, the big screen Nancy Drew (Warner Bros., Rated PG, DVD-$29.98 SRP) – starring Emma Roberts as the sleuthing teen – pales in comparison to the most recent Drew-esque heroine, Veronica Mars. Still, I’m sure the tweenie crowd will delight in Roberts effervescence and the film’s light touch. Bonus materials include featurettes, a music video, and a gag reel.

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Those trippy teens Linc, Pete, and Julie return for the rest of their inaugural season with The Mod Squad: Season 1 – Volume 2 (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$39.98 SRP). The 4-disc set features the remaining 13 episodes, as well as a featurette on Julie’s fashions. Groovy.

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The wonderful thing about the toy explosion of he last 10 or so years is that we’ve seen many a niche license explored by many a start-up toy company looking to make their mark. Sometimes the results are disappointing, to say the least, but sometimes the results make a geek’s heart swoon. Such is the case with the figures based on the theatrical cult classic Flash Gordon being produced by newcomer Biff Bang Pow. Designed by Alex Ross, the first two figures released were Flash and his archnemesis, Ming The Merciless (#14.99 SRP each). Pictured below you’ll see the first two variants from the line – and as you can see, they capture the likenesses of actors Sam Jones and Max von Sydow nicely. Get your hands on these before they’re gone, and be sure to keep an eye out for Series 2.

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So there you have it… my humble suggestions for what to watch, listen to, play with, or waste money on this coming weekend. See ya next week…

-Ken Plume

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Win SAM & MAX: FREELANCE POLICE – THE COMPLETE SERIES on DVD!

Filed under: Contests — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:02 am

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We’re giving away, in conjunction with Shout! Factory, a copy of SAM & MAX: FREELANCE POLICE – THE COMPLETE SERIES on DVD.

Enter into the wild world of screwy quixotic missions, jammed packed with nerve-jangling action as Steve Purcell’s popular comic book series Sam & Max Freelance Police comes to life in Sam & Max: Freelance Police!!! The Complete Series DVD box set from Shout! Factory. Featuring collectible DVD packaging art with original illustrations by creator Steve Purcell, this 3-DVD box set contains all 13 action-packed episodes, hours of exclusive hyper-kinetic interactive bonus features and more! Sam & Max: Freelance Police!!! The Complete Series is priced to own at $34.99.

The adventures of Sam & Max: Freelance Police!!! is an edgy and often irreverent animated series based on a pair of Purcell’s enormously popular underground comic. Sam is a six-foot tall anthropomorphic dog in detective clothing; and Max is a “hyperkinetic rabbity-thing.” They like to call themselves “freelance police” and often travel to different countries and the Moon to solve the most baffling crime mystery of the day.

Check out the trailer HERE.

Contest ends at midnight EST on Friday, March 21st.

CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Friday, March 21st.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 3/14/2008

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:01 am

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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds…

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Trailer Park: Showing Signs of Aging

Filed under: Columns,Trailer Park — admin @ 12:00 am

By Christopher Stipp

Archives? Right Here…

I’m awesome. I wrote a book. It’s got little to do with movies. Download and read “Thank You, Goodnight” right HERE for free.

Sooo….I guess all that hulabaloo about the INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL pictures and all the Cease and Desist and all the requests to take down the information regarding one of the biggest “spoilers” isn’t so important after all.

I’ve seen some excellent digs at this poster. From pot shots at the greasy, mustachioed wierdness of Ray Winstone to the K-Mart PictureCenter quality pose that Karen Allen is giving to Shia LaBeouf’s inspired portrait-like quality that appears to be some cut scene from THE HEAVENLY KID. I’m frankly amazed that this is what we’ve been given from Drew Struzan, Lord of movie poster promotion. However, and this is a big however coming from me regarding the pimping of this film, Harrison Ford looks great.

Finally.

He doesn’t look overly Photoshopped like he did in the early incarnations of the promos but when you compare the two you wonder what went awry. Paramount clearly could have kept chugging along as normal with its rendering of the geezer but I honestly appreciate that Drew has been allowed to show Harrison’s age. It’s almost bittersweet that the guy who has been leading the charge for so many of these films, and please keep your comments to yourself if you want to be one of those contrarian bastards who want to say why INDIANA JONES films aren’t that great and that we’re all blinded by our halcyon days long gone by, has his age brutally shown in aged detail. I love it, though. It’s one of the best and most honest parts of the promotion of this film.

Something else, though, that everyone here should learn quickly, and why Bill Hicks was right: marketing departments are essentially Satan’s little helpers. All across the Intertubes there were take downs and people not reporting on the story about that alien like skull at the very center of the film’s poster. Seems so much work to get people to fall into lockstep with the controlled reporting on INDIANA’s fruition into a full-fledged film but I can understand why some noobs would fear the gummy teeth of retribution (i.e. no more scoops or exclusives. Something you never have to worry about seeing here) and buckle.

Me, I don’t really care that much but I have found that this movie has provided hours of entertainment to me ever since the loose lipped extra starting spilling plot points to a podunk publication. You’ve had a break in, a dirty deal in the releasing of photos from the set, the weird ass skull incident that launched so much fury and now I think it may finally be coming to an end.

It would be great to finally move on to something new but as long as there are weeks before the film’s opening I can hopefully be assured there should be something equally as bizarre as anything above that will reaffirm my belief that there is nothing more entertaining than a marketing department trying to control the message.

STREET KINGS (2008)

Director: David Ayer
Cast: Keanu Reeves, Forest Whitaker, Chris Evans, Hugh Laurie
Release: April 11, 2008
Synopsis: In STREET KINGS, a police thriller directed by David Ayer, Keanu Reeves plays Tom Ludlow, a veteran LAPD Vice Detective. Ludlow sets out on a quest to discover the killers of his former partner, Detective Terrance Washington (Terry Crews). Academy® Award winner Forest Whitaker plays Captain Wander, Ludlow’s supervisor, whose duties include keeping him within the confines of the law and out of the clutches of Internal Affairs Captain Biggs (Hugh Laurie). Ludlow teams up with a young Robbery Homicide Detective (Chris Evans) to track Washington’s killers through the diverse communities of Los Angeles. Their determination pays off when the two Detectives track down Washington’s murderers and confront them in an attempt to bring them to justice.

View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)

Prognosis: Negative. I remember my youth when the exposure to life outside of my lily-white suburbs, and what was really happening inside the downtrodden ghettoes of inner cities like Los Angeles and even my own series of projects within Chicago, films like BOYZ N THE HOOD and MENACE II SOCIETY and even COLORS made an impression on me. To see what was happening to a class of people that had been largely ignored by mainstream films, save for the occasional exploitation flick, started my sociological interest in the inequities of things.

This film is going to do none of that.

Well, maybe it will do a little to show what’s happening still within many communities but it certainly begins with a swift introduction.

The hip-hop beat that starts the trailer is what should grab a lot of attentions, to say nothing of the dissociated clips that blend quite nicely; you’ve got a little gangbanging, some cop funeral which is going to play well into Keanu’s “street rage” and, Lordy, we’ve got Common. Common was without question, without a doubt, without a second’s pause, the best thing next to Ryan Reynold’s performance.

Common genuinely elevates what could easily be a tired and played out role and gives us a sneak peek of what could be a masterful role.

We segue into an explanation from Voiceover Guy, he holds back thankfully, about what the crux of this movie is going to be about and it’s a little blend of Forest and Keanu that, again, get my attention. Where we could have something like HARSH TIMES there is a genuine departure from that movie’s obvious shortcomings in its trailer and we have something more kinetic and exciting.

Cops working their own side of the law, shootouts, gun running, car chases, all things, which, again, could go either way it is a nice touch to see the words “From the Writer and Director of TRAINING DAY”. Nothing seems like it’s done out of need to make this movie seem more than it is but with the exception of a Keanu pun that deserved to be put on the cutting room floor up until this point it’s the kind of film that made TRAINING DAY a gem.

True, cops hustling on the street, good guys who act like bad guys, it seems to ring fairly hollow when you list the number of movies that have come after films like TRAINING DAY or MENACE or HOOD and have horribly fucked the genre up for everyone else who have made dime store copies of these films but there just FEELS like something else going on here.

What’s more, the scene at the end was really good insofar that when Keanu and Chris Evans (a guy who deserves a little more than he has gotten as of late) chat about what and who they’re going to kill before running into a house full of thuggery it’s really surprising to see Reeves take the bad ass lead. A real departure, a movie which seems full of it.

PROTAGONIST (2008)

Director: Jessica Yu
Cast: Hans-Joachim Klein, Mark Salzman
Release:
Out now on Netflix
Synopsis: Four disparate lives intertwine with surprising results in this absorbing documentary, an official selection of the 2007 Sundance Film Festival. A German terrorist, a bank robber, an “ex-gay” evangelist and a martial arts student form the unlikely quartet. In her interweaving narrative, Oscar-winning filmmaker Jessica Yu explores parallels between human life and the formal dramatic structure of the Greek tragedian Euripides.

View Trailer:
* Medium (QuickTime)

Prognosis: Positive. To start, I cannot express how informative and memorable Sociology 363: Sociology of Men and Masculinity, taught by Stephen Kulis, Ph.D., was to take at Arizona State University when I was an undergrad. It was a class in what I can only describe as a roadmap for what it is to be a man in America. From bravado to machismo to homosexuality it was a class that taught me what society seems as acceptable in the realm of the male.

I didn’t realize it at first when I saw this trailer but I was engrossed when I saw it.

Actually, I think I was moments from turning away from this trailer until I got the thread that was connecting everything. This preview seems to be an exercise in having completely divergent stories share a commonality, without ever mentioning it, but while I don’t really understand where we’re going at the beginning this is a trailer that deserves some attention.

“What makes a man a hero?”

Yeah, this is where I rolled my eyes too. Believe me no matter how good the content is inside I still take umbrage with this rhetorical line of questioning. It’s a bit goofy, really. The music, as well, it sounding like Jason is going to jump out of the woods at any moment to chop someone’s head off, is an odd soundtrack.

The puppets, though, give me pause. What’s the deal with the wooden dolls? I have no idea but it’s about that time when we get introduced to a bank robber, Joe Loya. Joe narrates his own story of how his violent dad received his comeuppance at the hands of his boy and how, after he was done with him, went out looking for a bigger score.

We’re whisked away to Mark Pierpont, a preacher, with a rather ribald secret: he was gay. I know, no big surprise in this time of these things, no pun intended, coming out on a weekly basis, but it’s Mark’s brief reflection on himself that’s so insightful.

Hans-Joachim Klein is a terrorist. Even though he seems to be German, we won’t hold that against him, the kraut, it is utterly fascinating to listen to how one gets their start in being a part of radicalism and, eventually, violence against people. It’s a story I know I’ll want to listen to intently.

Then we get Mark Salzman. He likes to kick ass. He talked about being beat up in school and coming upon a man who taught martial arts. The rest, as they say, is history but he seems to be the most well rounded of the bunch.

We get the Official Selection of Sundance logo and then are treated to all four of these dudes giving us snippets of what their inner struggles were made of before we’re launched into deeper exploration of these men.

Joe talks about how many times he’s robbed banks and how he loved the feeling of injecting the sense of terror into people.

Stick in quotes from the Los Angeles Times and LA Weekly. Quickly, you can gather from a very broad scope that this is a movie about men and what it means to be a man.

These narratives are all coalescing into something uniform and, I think, this is what makes this trailer such a stand out in its field; you have divergent people but there is one thread that under everything these men say they are and that is the sense there is regret and sorrow in each of their stories.

It would be so easy to see this as a simple exercise in documentary filmmaking but when was the last film that came out as a treatise on masculinity? It may not seem like much but it’s a topic long overdue for a serious examination.

WANTED (2008)

Director: Timur Bekmambetov
Cast: James McAvoy, Angelina Jolie, Morgan Freeman, Terrance Stamp, Common
Release:
June 27, 2008
Synopsis: Based upon Mark Millar’s explosive graphic novel series and helmed by stunning visualist director Timur Bekmambetov – creator of the most successful Russian film franchise in history, the Night Watch series – Wanted tells the tale of one apathetic nobody’s transformation into an unparalleled enforcer of justice. In 2008, the world will be introduced to a hero for a new generation: Wesley Gibson.

25-year-old Wes (James McAvoy) was the most disaffected, cube-dwelling drone the planet had ever known. His boss chewed him out hourly, his girlfriend ignored him routinely and his life plodded on interminably. Everyone was certain this disengaged slacker would amount to nothing. There was little else for Wes to do but wile away the days and die in his slow, clock-punching rut. Until he met a woman named Fox (Angelina Jolie). After his estranged father is murdered, the deadly sexy Fox recruits Wes into the Fraternity, a secret society that trains Wes to avenge his dad’s death by unlocking his dormant powers. As she teaches him how to develop lightning-quick reflexes and phenomenal agility, Wes discovers this team lives by an ancient, unbreakable code: carry out the death orders given by fate itself. With wickedly brilliant tutors – including the Fraternity’s enigmatic leader, Sloan (Morgan Freeman) – Wes grows to enjoy all the strength he ever wanted. But, slowly, he begins to realize there is more to his dangerous associates than meets the eye. And as he wavers between newfound heroism and vengeance, Wes will come to learn what no one could ever teach him: he alone controls his destiny.

View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)

Prognosis: Positive. Anything goes at this point, I suppose.

I understand that Mark Millar is a comic genius. He writes some of the best funny books this side of Brian Michael Bendis (Fortune and Glory needs to be made into a short film if nothing else). I also understand that this genre of turning comics into films, of toying with the convention of the superhero thanks in part to HANCOCK, SUPERHERO MOVIE and the like, is really the bread and butter for many a suit in the air conditioned confines of some Hollywood studios. But, really, Angelina Jolie as a bad ass?

Yeah, that could work.

For all their grumbling that the anatomically challenged “artist” Rob Liefeld can’t possibly understand that men were not born with 10 packs and that Cable could never posses a bicep that is bigger than his skull, Jolie’s big boobness actually jives with the horny predisposition that many comic readers have always silently embraced while publicly eschewing the practice.

I initially wanted to scoff at using Angelina here in this film as someone who could be the titular (every pun intended) character of a comic book that really tried to work against convention. Isn’t the irony fabulous? She is the walking reason why some dweebs would pay to see this movie and I cannot think of anyone else more appropriate of the role for Wesley. He’s meek, a little nebbish and genuinely looks like a normal sap who is sucked into this world of intrigue.

The trailer explodes with the kind of zeal that I would have usually reserved for the INDIANA JONES trailer but since this one looks like a little bit more packed with action, as Angelina helps to quickly establish many pieces to this film’s synopsis, I buy into it. Even as she delivers one of the most painful lines written for a human being to utter, “Your father was one of the greatest assassins that ever lived”, her gun play and expression as she tries to deliver a believable kill shot is priceless. And, seriously, Morgan Freeman saying about the kid’s father and his ability to handle a gun “he could conduct a symphony orchestra with it” is equally as awful on the ears.

Bad dialog aside it is McAvoy’s sheepishness that’s refreshing to watch. Seeing the gun clip fall out of a pistol he’s trying to handle lends a little humanity to a film that seems like it’s about to get a little more violent.

And we get that.

It’s an interesting premise to put out there, to those who don’t know the story, that this kid is sucked up from a life most people lead and it’s the perfect way to set things in motion. For as long as there have been superhero comics there has been the convention that here is a kid, here is something extraordinary, here kid meets extraordinary and here comes a bad ass. We all love and embrace the idea of the big black helicopters landing in out backyard and some swarthy European dressed in a finely tailored suit letting us know that we are free from our ordinary lives of bondage. This trailer sets all that in motion and coveys it all without saying too much.

Freeman’s voiceover that McAvoy is going to release his own “caged wolf”, again, is fucking painful to hear in that sort of obnoxious way that only absurd action movie dialog can be but the visuals are really something else. We’ve got car antics, sweet one shots from the driver seat, some dude shatters some high rise pane of glass with his face on his way out of it, with McAvoy displaying some of his double gun “skillz” as he crashes though a window of his own.

While I can’t forgive the really horrible choice of words in this thing (Mark definitely made a better product that wasn’t this cringe-y) the action on the screen is really well presented and I cannot wait to see the final product.

March 13, 2008

Ken P. D. Snyde-Cast #34: Cabin Fever

Filed under: Ken P.D. Snydecast — UncaScroogeMcD @ 7:33 pm

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Adult Swim’s Dana Snyder and FRED’s Ken Plume set out to have a literate conversation between two pals, but inevitably devolve into a verbal, and funny, free-for-all full of bickering, infighting, and the special kind of male bonding that comes from conflict expressed through the podcast medium.

Actor/comedian/raconteur Dana Snyder, you’re certainly aware, is Aqua Teen Hunger Force’s Master Shake, Squidbillies‘ Granny, Minoriteam’s Dr. Wang, and The Venture Bros.‘ Alchemist. Available for weddings and bar mitzvahs (bat availability pending), you can keep tabs on him via his website, www.eyeofthesnyder.com.

Ken Plume is the editor-in-chief here at FRED. He is a friend of Dana’s, as well as his arch-nemesis.

VISIT THE SNYDECAST EXPERIENCE

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KEN P.D. SNYDECAST #34: Cabin Fever – Ken & Dana return with a debate on the definition of what can be called a sitcom, continue to refine their own pitch, discuss the awkwardness of public interaction, and fulfill yet another outstanding wager.

[CONTENT WARNING]: This podcast may contain some foul language and horribly off-color jokes. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

DOWNLOAD: (right click to save)
Episode #34 (MP3 format)

[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/snydecast/ken_p_d_snyde_cast-34.mp3]

SUBSCRIBE
Subscribe to this Podcast via iTunes

Got something to say? E-mail Dana & Ken at the Snydecast mailbag.

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CLICK HERE FOR THE SNYDECAST ARCHIVES

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 3/13/2008

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:59 am

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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds…

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March 12, 2008

Toy Box: Darth Maul Holographic mini-bust

Filed under: Columns,Toy Box — admin @ 5:09 pm

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Gentle Giant has produced many products for many licenses, but I think it’s safe to say that their Star Wars mini-busts not only put them on the map, they’ve kept them there. They’ve released hundreds of busts in the series, and some of them rank up there as the finest Star Wars collectibles around. Others…well, not so much.

One dead horse that GG has beaten back to life and then ridden to death again is the use of exclusives. Now, exclusives that merely mean I have to buy them from Bob’s Shop are no big deal, as long as Bob is given enough product to meet demand. But highly limited exclusives, or those restricted by limitations of space and boundary (like Blister exclusives available only in Japan, or one of the U.K. only exclusives) are enough to twist your Wookie hairs.

For an exhibit in Brussels, Germany later this year, GG is producing 2500 Holographic Darth Maul mini-busts. Only 1500 will actually be at the exhibit though (called Star Wars: The Exhibition), and the other 1000 are available only through Gentle Giant’s own webstore. The busts run $55 each, and are a re-issue of the 2007 Darth Maul bust, this time in translucent blue with a light up feature.

If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to drop me an email at mwc@mwctoys.com, or visit my site Michael’s Review of the Week – Captain Toy. On to the review!

Holographic Darth Maul light up Mini-Bust

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Packaging – ***
If you’re acquianted with Gentle Giant’s usual Star Wars bust boxes, then this one will be no surprise. It has the advantage of having a window so you can see the final product, but since this is one you’ll most likely be buying on line, it isn’t quite as useful. He also comes with the nifty little baseball card Certificate of Authenticity, something that most of the basic re-deco busts do not. As I mentioned earlier, he’s limited to 2500.

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Sculpting – ****
I loved the sculpt on this bust when it was first released, and it hasn’t gotten any different. They’ve given us Maul in one of his most iconic poses, and the detail is excellent. It won’t be the sculpt that will be an issue, but rather the ability of the viewer to fully appreciate it. Whenever you cast something in a translucent material, the clear properties make it difficult for the human eye to discern the small details and intricate work. There’s no contrast, making it tough to appreciate what’s here.

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Paint – N/A
There’s no paint – he’s clear blue.

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Design – ***
I mentioned the overall design as part of the sculpt, and it’s the same pose and style as the original bust of course. I love that look, no doubt about it. But this time they cast him in this clear plastic, and it is just plastic. It looks kind of cool at first, but it really is a big bust up, and it felt like one in my hand. The resin base adds some heft, but the overall plasticy feel just hurts the impression of what you’re getting.

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The clear plastic also means that glued areas, like hood, show through, marring the overall appearance.

Light Up Feature – ***
The light up feature is powered by three of the small watch/calculator style batteries, and these are included. Pressing a button on the bottom turns it on. The light is nice and bright, and looks good in a slightly darkened room.

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Value – **
At 2500 pieces, this isn’t a particularly limited bust. The inaccessibility of the Brussels exhibition makes it tougher for the majority of collectors to get it, but the 1000 that were available on GG’s site helped ease that burden a bit. This version is not as nice, or as important to the collection as the regular release, and at $55, he’s going to cost you a good ten bucks more. Fifty five bucks for a big bust up, even one that lights up? Meh. If you can only afford one Maul mini-bust, stick with the original.

Things to Watch Out For –
Not a thing.

Overall – ***
I love the sculpt and the pose, but that’s because these are the same as the original release. What’s new here is the translucent blue plastic and light up feature, and both of these are decent if not exceptional. It’s a lot of money for a bust made from existing molds, from fairly cheap material, and in a fairly large edition size. I suspect most collectors will consider this another opportunity by Gentle Giant to scam them out of some more of their money.

Where to buy –
Here your options are a bit limited. Gentle Giant’s site sold out of the 1000, and unless you happen to be in Brussels during the exhibition, you’re probably going to have to resort to ebay. You can use MyAuctionLinks to help you find one.

Related Links –
Other Star Wars mini-bust reviews include:

– the Royal Guard, Jawas, Dengar and Zuckuss were the most recent.

– Other Star Wars mini-busts I’ve covered include Chewbacca and Darth Maul, Jedi Luke, Qui-Gon Jinn, Palpatine and Skiff Lando.

Cabin Fever #15: I’m Ramblin’

Filed under: Cabin Fever — UncaScroogeMcD @ 5:05 pm

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Oh no! Just when you thought it was safe to hang out at the Quick Stop…

cabin.jpgCabin Fever (hosted by the twisted souls Brian Fitzpatrick and Aaron Poole) is the result of having too much time on your hands and access to your local community radio station.

Over the course of an hour, they manage to trawl the depths of good taste, plus throw some music in. How much more could you want from a podcast?… Quality? Oh… we didn’t think of that.

Enjoy! And we hope our cross Atlantic friends can understand the Irish accent 😉

Hugs and Kisses,
Aaron P. + Rev. Fitzy

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CABIN FEVER #15: I’m Ramblin’ – Thankfully, the boys had enough time to record this week, despite technoheads taking up their studio time. This week there’s a lot of talk about relieving yourself on trains in India, your own pants, and numerous other places. Nothing new there, then. Aaron breaks some geek rules and isn’t too sure if he’s done the right thing, while Brian strips off within the first 5 minutes. Good times! We have the first ever Cabin Fever Competition (check the forum for rules and conditions) and music from Joel Moss, Caleb Lee and Tobacco Road. And the show is free! What more could you ask for? Huh!?

[CONTENT WARNING]: Explicit contents! We say every naughty word you can think of. You have been warned!

DOWNLOAD: (right click to save)
Episode #15 (MP3 format)

[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/cabinfever/cabin_fever_15.mp3]

SUBSCRIBE
Subscribe to this Podcast via iTunes

Got something to say? E-mail Aaron & Brian at the Cabin Fever mailbag.

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CLICK HERE FOR THE CABIN FEVER ARCHIVES

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 3/12/2008

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:01 am

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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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  • Kenny Everett and the DIY Bee Gees Kit… (Thingamabob)

March 11, 2008

Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 3/11/2008

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:01 am

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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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  • Buster Keaton’s “The Playhouse”… (Thingamabob)

March 10, 2008

TV Or Not TV: Genesis 3/9 – 3/16

Filed under: Columns,TV Or Not TV — admin @ 11:40 pm

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We’ve all been there. You are sitting on your couch on any given night, remote in your hand and a look of confusion and abandonment on your face because you just don’t know what to watch. You really want something to watch and you just can’t bare to watch something from your DVD collection for the umpteenth time. In that moment of television desperation you may have wished there was someone that would help you find something worth while within the 255 channels of confusion. You may have asked for a guide to steer you clear of the pitfalls and tarpits of bad TV and take you to the all mighty promise land of boob tube perfect.

Hello, my name is Will. I’m here to help.

As with any first article you may ask, “Hey Will, why can I trust you?” Believe me, I’m qualified. Even with having a full time job I some how find enough time to watch full time TV, maybe even more than the hours I put in at work. I’ve had both cable and DirecTV just so I could have East Coast feeds for the major networks and stagger my DVR recording of just about everything on television from 5 PM to midnight and beyond. In the words of Indiana Jones, “Trust me.” If I lead you astray, there’s always TV Guide.

Timing, as they say, is everything and I’m delving into these uncharted waters at the best time possible. Why you ask? Because the ripples created by the writer’s strike are still washing upon the shore of our TV viewing and just about every popular show on television is in repeats right now.

You’re best bets this week are going to be on the first four days of this week (that’s Monday through Thursday in case I’m not very clear). There is something for just about everyone. Friday through Sunday I suggest you find some good reading materials, dust off the ol’ gym membership or take up a new hobby (I hear wood carving is very therapeutic).

In the future I’ll give you my top picks for the week before getting into the nitty gritty. Since things are so sparse instead I’ll just give you a quick run down before I get in to the meat and couch potatoes of it all.

This week keep your eyes out for The New Adventures of Old Christine, Gone Country, American Idol, Jericho, and LOST. I’d also be remiss if I didn’t say that if you have HBO and you aren’t watching In Treatment then you are cheating yourself out of a decent half hour of solid TV every day of the week.

MONDAY

CBS: The New Adventures of Old Christine is one of the two top choices I have for you for tonight. The only reason I’m hesitant to recommend this one is because you need to know a little bit of back story, but at least it is a situation comedy and it will keep you mildly amused.

CMT: That’s right, CMT. If you haven’t caught Gone Country yet then you are in for a treat because there’s a marathon from the beginning. Two words make this show pure gold people: Bobby Brown. Even if you aren’t a fan of Reality Television you have to give this a go.

FOX: New Amsterdam is about an immortal who is now an investigator. I liked this show better when it had another name, Angel.

TUESDAY

FOX: The 800 lb. gorilla stomps its feet again this week as the final 12 give it a go on American Idol. The skunk headed girl some how made it, so tune in with me to root her off.

CBS: The final three episodes of Jericho are upon us, and they could be the final ones of the series let alone the season. If you haven’t a clue what the show is about then bust out that Netflix account and get Season 1 as fast as you can.

WEDNESDAY

ABC: Wife Swap and Super Nanny are back to back so you can enjoy a double header of people who make really bad decisions. If these people making bad decisions aren’t the kind you like then you could always try…

FOX: Moment of Truth just perplexes the hell out of me. So far I haven’t seen anyone come away from this show unscathed. Face it people, it is only entertainment if your dirty laundry comes out on the air, and you should have known better before sitting down. (Oh yeah, the American Idol results show is on after this so if you are lazy you can turn this on and just coast through to 10 o’clock.)

CMT: That lovable underdog Rudy tries to get onto the Notre Dame football team. OK, I’m a sucker for this silly flick, and I can’t tell you why. Hey, at least it isn’t Moment of Truth.

THURSDAY

ABC: I have good news, bad news, and more bad news. The good news: On LOST tonight you finally find out who else makes up the Oceanic 6 and you get to find out who is spying on the freighter for Ben. The bad news: Someone might die tonight. The more bad news: this is the next to last episode until late April.

CW: Two of the only shows I watch on the CW are on tonight, Smallville and Reaper. I recommend the second over the first for the uninitiated. Besides, shouldn’t that Clark guy know how to fly by now?

FRIDAY

FOX: ‘Till Death is new tonight. Oddly enough I feel like I just said nothing is on.

SCI-FI: If you don’t have Netflix but you do have the Sci-Fi channel then you can still get caught up on Jericho. Four episodes of Season 1 air from 8 PM to Midnight every week in this time slot.

SATURDAY

Move along… nothing to see here… all right, fine… I’ll try.

A&E: Arnold stars as a Secret Agent who’s wife has no clue of his real job in True Lies. The most shocking part of the film for me was that I actually liked Tom Arnold’s performance as Arnold’s partner. Go figure.

AMC: Get a new take on the Western genre with Silverado. Enjoy Danny Glover before the Lethal Weapon movies. If this one isn’t your cup of Sasparilla perhaps you might prefer…

ENCORE: Put your boots up and rest a spell and take in Tombstone. Val Kilmer looks scary sickly in this flick as Doc Holiday.

SUNDAY

ABC: Extreme Make Over: Home Edition will undoubtedly tug at your heart strings. I like that Home Edition is still going strong but the show where they were hurting people to make them look better is long gone.

MTV: Randy Jackson Presents: America’s Best Dance Crew… sorry, just kidding… I couldn’t resist.

That’s it folks, my guide for what to watch. It’s slim pickins out there so check back in next week and I’ll try to do right by you again. Until next time keep the remote batteries fresh and the couch cushions fluffed.

– Will Wilkins missed at least three television shows to write this article. Thankfully, there is TiVo.

Opinion In A Haystack: The Neon Mobile

Filed under: Columns,Opinion In A Haystack — admin @ 11:12 pm

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To begin, a short foray into my foundations of cinematic quality:

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Love is damn beautiful. That seems to be the word on the street at least, and my purpose here is not to counter that fact. What I have a problem with is the “falling” part. I don’t fall in love easily. My heart doesn’t stand on the corner begging for affection with a sign that says, “will break for food.” This applies to all aspects of my life, most relevantly, movies. It takes awhile to get me in the sack, no matter how good the cinematic blow job may be. It takes reflection, analysis, and multiple viewings before I will even let a movie hold hands with me. I need to know where the relationship is going. I need to know that after years of being together, it won’t let me down and my feelings will not flutter away. The Big Lebowski, Robocop, Jaws, and others like them, all share very deep, loving, and highly sexual unions with my brain parts. They are films that have passed the one true test of quality that I, and Matt Damon, have full faith in. That test (Clark Griswold drum roll please) is time!

Time. The enemy and surveyor of all things. The proven god of us all. The one thing we can’t escape or destroy. The only thing Doc Brown ever invented something for that actually worked. I invoke the mighty name of Mr. Damon because this past summer in an EW interview, he was asked what he thought of awards and awards shows. Matt responded by calling them “fucking bullshit,” an answer which, in and of itself, is great alone, but he went a genius step further and stated “The only way to judge a movie is 10 years down the line.” Check the interview out here:

How absolutely right you are sir, and might I add how because of that statement I shall forgive any bad movies you may have done, which thankfully, isn’t a lot. While I am not as militant as Mr. Damon (I have a 5 year rule.), time is the only judge that seems to be overlooked by most of the world, including the pretentious film community. Hell, even the Academy doesn’t think ahead. Planet of the Apes (the real one with Charlton Heston, not the fake one made by the demon-possessed former-genius Tim Burton) didn’t win Best Picture in the year of its release and the film community and the fans still talk about it to this day. What did win best picture that year? Marty? I don’t know, you don’t know, and none of us care.

My point here, if I have not pounded into your head beyond reason yet, is time has the only true say in what is good or bad. Any critiques that are made before an acceptable number of years have passed are just opinions and opinions alone. This is why when a current piece of cinema sucks the vans deferens out of me with its crafted perfection (ala There Will Be Blood or Hot Fuzz) I don’t get down on one knee and offer up a commitment along with Hallmark’s finest. I keep it in a place of honor on the back burner where it shall stay until half a decade later when love, true love, can be allowed to blossom properly with tender, repeat viewings. It can also be used as an example of how much some other current movie sucks compared to the genius of years past. That philosophy might seem ignorant, but coupled with glorious nostalgia of my youthful years gone, it’s just chock full of bliss. Bitter old men are we who cling to what was good and damn what is now, Foolish young men are they who praise without hindsight. Yes, I wrote that quote, and yes, I’m trying too hard. Feel free to put that sentence on any bathroom stall, or perhaps get it tattooed on your epidermis, but please, give me credit for the quote, and if possible, send a picture of the affected area.

Is 2008 too late to file a complaint from 1995? I’m sure it is, but when I was “filing” it back then, verbally, to any one of my half-conscious barely listening school buddies they didn’t seem to know or care what I was obnoxiously “filing” about at the top of my lungs. Several times since the mid point of yester-decade I have brought up this very complaint only for it to dwell upon deaf ears. It’s not that I felt no one knew what I was saying. It’s that no one and I mean NO ONE, seemed nearly as mad at the obvious blasphemy, the inarguable cowshit, and the narrow minded piss poor thought that went into putting NEON FUCKING LIGHTS ON THE BATMOBILE!!!

Sorry, that’s thirteen years of pent up anger flowing out of my fingers like a hummingbird’s neck laceration. Yes, the movie I am of course talking about is the beginning of the end, before the beginning, of the Batman franchise…Batman Forever, Joel Schumacher’s second most hated film, only trumped by the Batman movie he made after it. However, I am not going to rag on Batman and Robin, because the fact that it was without one single doubt a rotting nest of fungus was never as big a surprise to me as it was to those around me. All my friends, parents, teachers, co-workers, and neighborhood chums somehow laid a thick layer of forgiveness on Forever, so much so that it blinded them to the incessantly bright globs of guano being squeezed out on the screen. I always assumed it was their love of Jim Carrey as The Riddler that helped the retinal detachment, but that doesn’t seem sufficient enough. You see, I am not going to even complain about the shortcomings of the movie itself. Bad or good, it was…as The Dude might say, “whatever.” Personally, I will always be a bigger fan of the two Tim Burton films, and the Christopher Nolan film isn’t too shabby either. My main problem simply lies in the clear cut truth in just looking at the Forever Batmobile itself. That is where all the glaring awful signs of this old misfire lay. Why point out the corny dialogue, campy sets, the fact that Two-face acts like The Joker, or the painful addition of Chris O’Donnell as Robin, when the foremost crime hasn’t even been addressed?

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Batman is The DARK Knight. He is that which lurks in the shadows of the city, the one criminals fear as more than just a man, but a BAT man, right? This is a character that originated out of death. This is the all-time premiere hero for those of us who champion the serious, brooding, vengeance for everything and everyone that has ever wronged this world. RIGHT? So I ask you, how did the studio, how did the modelers, how did the producers, writers, hell, even the actors let the greatest fictional car in all of comicdom, one that belongs to the Darkest of Dark Knights (DARK!) ever even make it in front of a camera for five seconds while adorned in neon lights? I don’t understand. And, of course, if it wasn’t bad enough, they let Schumacher do it twice, and then the world complained that it sucked… finally. I’m not going to sit here and put all the blame on Joel. People do make mistakes, and hopefully when said mistakes are engaged and you don’t realize it someone (perhaps, I don’t know, DC comics, or any human with a pulsing heart!) will let you in on the fact that you are fucking hell’s vagina.

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“Hey, Joel…what’s up, man? That pastry looks delicious. Hey, can I talk to you for a sec?”

“Sure.”

“Yeah well, you realize that there are neon lights on the Batmobile right? Like we have all been talking about it and well, black is kinda Batman’s thing…and he has to be dark and mysterious and all of us feel neon might not be the way to go…you know…heh…its neon.”

“Good point. We’ll take off the neon. Make the whole thing pink…”

“Well, uh…like I said…black is rather crucial to the process.”

“Black, huh? Good…go with it.”

Sometimes that’s all it takes folks. Was it really that hard to say something to the man? Schumacher is not made of complete cinematic evil. I have faith that the man that was responsible for such cool flicks as The Lost Boys, Flatliners, and Falling Down could, with a proper tongue lashing, give the world a viable Batmobile. This is especially considering the fact that it was preceded by one of the top-five coolest automotive creations for film ever. Love or hate the movies, the Burton-mobile was beautifully slick, and not too far off from those that adorned the comics and animated series (two mediums I would think garner the most militant respect from comic fans.) So there, I had to let it out; thanks for reading it. I am hoping that someone, if not all people who read this will say “hey I was screaming that too” or something akin to that, because no one ever felt as passionate about it in my own life as I pathetically seemed to. At such an age, movies were worth such passion, while politics, religion, and relationships were the “stupid, boring” problems for adults to worry about. I must say lastly that this fervent outrage was never derived from comic book foundation, merely a firm love of movies and an incredibly firm hatred of such a lack of respect for an iconic American character. Trust me, I would have been just as pissed if they made a movie where Darth Vader was a sniveling little shit…oh wait…

Now, MY TOP 5 80’s and 90’s SECONDARY MOVIE ENDINGS! A secondary movie ending is one that is usually better known as an epilogue, but for our purposes here, it’s an “ending” that takes place after the main conflict or antagonist of the piece has been resolved or killed respectively.

5. Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992) Buffy’s secondary ending can be found after the credits. Here we find Paul Ruebens (better known as Pee Wee) still scuffling around in a stairwell humorously groaning and badly faking his extremely long vampire’s death due to a stake in the heart. Taking into consideration the sounds Ruebens makes here, one wonders if the joke wasn’t heinously ripped off by Family Guy in the Willy Wonka parody episode.

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4. Short Circuit 2 (1988) In what might possibly be the most hardcore 80’s movie to ever exist, we have a secondary ending that takes place right after the fade out of the final chase scene. A chase scene, mind you, that involves a jewel thief getting apprehended by a Mohawk-wearing-sentient-robot (Johnny 5) to the tune of Bonnie Tyler’s “Holding out for a Hero” and ends with a Tarzan swing (accompanied by the famous Tarzan scream) from a crane onto a speedboat. If you’re like me that is pretty much the gateway to the heavens. Anyway, the secondary ending brings us to an induction ceremony for newly accepted American Citizens, where we see a recently refurbished, completely gold-plated, J5 receiving his citizenship to the colonies. Now the reason this is on the list is the shear brilliance of how this scene invokes the signs of the times it’s in. Only in a movie of this era could a robot, with minimal trouble, glass ceilings, and such a short period of time become an EQUAL member of the human race without so much as one person questioning the moral or ethical problems that accompany it. Then entire plot of the Robin Williams movie Bicentennial Man is a robot trying to do what J5 does in months, over the course of 200 years. This mindset is sort of akin to how in the 80’s sitcom ALF, the Tanner family never even took 5 minutes to bother asking ALF if he knew about any of the mysteries of the universe or life. Instead, they were content with trying to stop him from acting on his “get rich quick” schemes. Those were the days.

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3. Wayne’s World (1992) Now, I know what you’re thinking. Yes, Wayne’s World, in all its genius, has three different “didilly-doo” endings to the conflict presented. However, the secondary ending is the one found at the very end of the credits in which we see Wayne and Garth uncomfortably reading magazines. Wayne waxes pretentious and philosophical about the film’s endeavors while Garth meekly states that he simply hopes that the audience doesn’t think it “sucks.” This quiet little moment, and the film that preceded it, are all the more reason to miss the careers of two incredibly talented comedians at the top of their game.

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2. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986) The entire sequence with Ed Rooney getting on the school bus is beyond the definition of classic. Is it a secondary ending? Yes. Rooney has already lost, and we get to witness his further humiliation. This is for my money, hands down, the best content shown during rolling credits in a film ever. Also, please note that this movie has a third ending after the credits completely end, one in which Ferris Bueller himself comes out in a bathrobe and in disbelief that we are still there, shushes us to go home. It’s nothing compared to the Principal Rooney scene, but you got to admire how much bang for your buck you used to get at the movies. Having such high quality content during the credits is rarely seen in today’s theaters. We are more relegated to outtakes or badly edited character interviews, not additional story elements.

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1. Poltergeist (1982) The first ending to happen is the entire house getting sucked into the vortex of “the other side.” We all know this. Then there is the beautiful scene of a fear-riddled emotionally-drained family driving quietly away from their literally broken home. They scuffle into a hotel room to the magnificently eerie lullaby of Jerry Goldsmith’s “Carol Anne Theme.” That has got to be one of the greatest quiet moments in cinema history. Left alone, them shutting the door to the hotel room and the credits rolling would be good enough to still keep this Tobe Hooper/Steven Spielberg classic at the top of its genre for over two decades. Then, only seconds after we are allowed to breath relief, the door swings back open and out comes the cheap hotel TV sliding into the side of the walkway, Craig T. Nelson pokes his head out the door for a peak then goes back in leaving the telly outside to rot. Hilarious, fitting, and completely perfect in its timing, this little moment is the ultimate reward to any viewer who witnesses the tribulations of this family for the past two hours. I still say that Craig T. Nelson should have grabbed a best actor nomination for Poltergeist, but I guess Mr. Incredible’s movie winning “Best Animated feature” will have to sate my thirst.

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Honorable mentions:

– Die Hard (1988) – Allen shoots the guy everyone thought was dead thus saving McClane’s life.

– Back to the Future (1985) – The Flying Delorean

– Rocky 3 (1982) – The famous Apollo/Rocky freeze frame fight.

– Twilight Zone: The Movie (1983) – Dan Aykroyd asking John Lithgow in the ambulance “Wanna see something really scary?”

– One Crazy Summer (1986) – Uncle Frank blowing up the radio station, Then, subsequently, the Stork brothers showing up to roast marshmallows.

If you think of any other great secondary endings, please let me know.

Win SOUTH PARK: IMAGINATIONLAND on DVD!

Filed under: Contests — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:02 am

We’re giving away, in conjunction with Paramount Home Video, five (5) copies of SOUTH PARK: IMAGINATIONLAND on DVD.

Contest ends at midnight EST on Monday, March 17th.

CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Monday, March 17th.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 3/10/2008

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:01 am

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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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March 7, 2008

Ken P. D. Snyde-Cast #33: A Total Eclipse Of The Heart

Filed under: Ken P.D. Snydecast — UncaScroogeMcD @ 5:18 pm

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Adult Swim’s Dana Snyder and FRED’s Ken Plume set out to have a literate conversation between two pals, but inevitably devolve into a verbal, and funny, free-for-all full of bickering, infighting, and the special kind of male bonding that comes from conflict expressed through the podcast medium.

Actor/comedian/raconteur Dana Snyder, you’re certainly aware, is Aqua Teen Hunger Force’s Master Shake, Squidbillies‘ Granny, Minoriteam’s Dr. Wang, and The Venture Bros.‘ Alchemist. Available for weddings and bar mitzvahs (bat availability pending), you can keep tabs on him via his website, www.eyeofthesnyder.com.

Ken Plume is the editor-in-chief here at FRED. He is a friend of Dana’s, as well as his arch-nemesis.

VISIT THE SNYDECAST EXPERIENCE

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KEN P.D. SNYDECAST #33: A Total Eclipse Of The Heart – Ken & Dana return with the results of their 2nd annual Oscars bet, wherein Ken decides that he’s no longer going to enter into ludicrous wagers with Dana ever again. Ever. Period.

[CONTENT WARNING]: This podcast may contain some foul language and horribly off-color jokes. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

DOWNLOAD: (right click to save)
Episode #33 (MP3 format)

[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/snydecast/ken_p_d_snyde_cast-33.mp3]

SUBSCRIBE
Subscribe to this Podcast via iTunes

Got something to say? E-mail Dana & Ken at the Snydecast mailbag.

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CLICK HERE FOR THE SNYDECAST ARCHIVES

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Trailer Park: Robert Wilonsky Is Ripping Me Off, Man

Filed under: Columns,Trailer Park — admin @ 4:40 pm

By Christopher Stipp

Archives? Right Here…

I’m awesome. I wrote a book. It’s got little to do with movies. Download and read “Thank You, Goodnight” right HERE for free.

Welcome back…

I’ve been knocked on my proverbial hind quarters this week with some nasty flu like bug that didn’t allow me any coherent thoughts except thinking about the sweet release of sleep wherever I could get it.

However, in a brief moment of clarity I did want to see what anyone in the peanut gallery has to say (simply leave your comments below) about the nature of a flop and what SEMI-PRO has to say for itself. Was $15 million, give or take, an obvious disappointment for the suits at the studio when you consider the amount of brutal advertising that went into this film’s release? Will Ferrell’s face was everywhere, to say nothing of his pronounced presence on ESPN (who hooked that product placement up?) last week, and the amount of spot advertising this thing had all over the airwaves leading up to this film’s release.

As an aside, I realize I know dick about how much cash needed to be laid out for all these things to be in front of the people’s eyes but $15 million almost seems like a conservative figure for all that went into promotions.

Did this dismal showing at the box office (one of Ferrell’s worst of his career) have anything to do with the level of talent that goes into your usual Will movie, namely the absence of Adam McKay?

You see films where there are cores of talented people that move from production to production and this film saw the lack of Adam, a guy who genuinely knows what makes Will good on the screen. While Will Ferrell obviously makes other films without Adam’s help you can see how bad BLADES OF GLORY was, how not profitable STRANGER THAN FICTION was, and it makes a good case for why people can be more or less creative with those who know their style. Judd Apatow has a keen sense of this and, wisely, has kept the band together. I’m generalizing, mostly, here but I am curious to know if anyone else knows of any creative team that is not greater than the sum of its parts and, in fact, only did their best work when all were aligned like planets in the sky.

And, have you had a chance to see reviewer, part-time fill-in for Ebert for a few rounds with Richard Roeper, Robert Wilonsky’s new show, The Ultimate Trailer Show? I have and, to be perfectly honest, it’s a good show. I like someone else doing what I’ve been doing here for years, judging films before anyone has even seen them, and casting a few stones at how someone’s taken the preview material and slapped it on the screen. I do feel a sense of deja vu, though, as I hear someone else talk about how a trailer comes off to a viewer and what it says about wanting to see a film. It kind of validates, albiet in a very minute way, my ramblings in this space. It’s good to know there is something to be said about looking at trailers with a critical eye. Although I think I would be a little easier on the eyes…

That’s it for me. Talk amongst yourselves. I’m going back to bed…

FUNNY GAMES (2008)

Director: Michael Haneke
Cast: Naomi Watts, Tim Roth, Michael Pitt, Brady Corbet, Devon Gearhart
Release: March 14, 2008
Synopsis: In this provocative and brutal thriller from director Michael Haneke, a vacationing family gets an unexpected visit from two deeply disturbed young men. Their idyllic holiday turns nightmarish as they are subjected to unimaginable terrors and struggle to stay alive.

View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)

Prognosis: Negative. I hope this film finds its way to a slow, painful wet grave and at least has the decency to pull the dirt over its head.

I can’t for the life of me understand the marketing angle for this trailer. When you have a film that deals with the slaughter of a family by a pair of d-bags who aren’t creepy, who simply look like young actors putting on airs to put themselves over as young Patrick Batemans, you really don’t want to go for the jaunty orchestration that is usually reserved for comedic high jinks that has people slipping on pies and getting rocked by pillows in the face.

No, what we get here is a trailer for a shittily (yeah, it’s a word) plotted out film where you have people’s lives held in the balance by a bet some young homicidal dudes put out there.

What really grinds me, though, is that I partially blame the victims.

We are introduced to an upper crust family who are on vacation or are visiting their second home in the Hamptons; it’s idyllic, serene, hell, they love listening to classical music which just lets all of us know how blue blood these elitist assholes actually are, and they even show this family getting into a wooden sailboat as they plan on getting away from all the trappings of having way too much money. Even the little boy in this thing is shown beaming at the prospect of ingesting Puccini in mass quantities because that will really cement the idea of the filmmakers: these are whiter than white rich folks.

Michael Pitt is trying hard, you can just see it, to try and harness the power of Arno Frisch, the star of the original FUNNY GAMES which debuted some decade ago in Austria. I can already see that trying to use tracing paper to mimic the effectiveness of a satire that held some weight years ago has its problems. Because, like idioms and how they differ from culture to culture, and why its so hard to grasp American “sayings” for many an import to our country, trying to replicate an idea can get lost in transition.

Here is where we are introduced to the same jaunty classical music as the patriarch gets the snot beat out of him with a pair of golf clubs, Pitt trying to be all sorts of Camel cool as he questions whether the victims would like to call the police, ambulance.

I am also troubled by the use of the title cards which tell us, in all caps, THANKS FOR SHOUTING YOU TERDS, “THE GAME IS SIMPLE.” “PICK A FAMILY”, “PICK A VICTIM.”

What follows is hard to take from a consumer standpoint as these two white shorted, white polo wearing a-holes then proceed to do an Eenie-Meenie game before proceeding to thrash Tim Roth, expose Naomi Watts, and just savage the entire family any way they see fit.

I’m no prude but there doesn’t seem to be any hook why I should fiscally support this film if this is either going to result in the family’s killing or the usual Hollywood one-up at the end when the beaten and downtrodden find a way to overcome their aggressors. Naomi’s pleading for her life at the end of this thing doesn’t help matters at all in the slightest.

While I understand that Michael Haneke’s the writer and director for what is, oddly, a retelling of a movie he’s already done (that must have been strange) I don’t think anyone gave any serious thought to how this should be marketed. As it stands this is perhaps one of the worst trailers I’ve seen this year and if this is a satirical examination of violence, which has been done so many times since he released his original, someone in marketing at Warner Independent Pictures needs to take a class in to what people think about women being tortured does to the bottom line.

Here’s a hint: Look at the campaign and grosses for CAPTIVITY.

THE HAPPENING (2008)

Director: M. Night Shyamalan
Cast: Mark Wahlberg, Zooey Deschanel, John Leguizamo, Betty Buckley
Release:
June 13, 2008
Synopsis: A couple goes on the run from an apocalyptic crisis that presents a large-scale threat to humanity.

View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)

Prognosis: Positive. I can’t get beyond the idea that there has been much made of the “Gotcha!” kind of filmmaking that has plagued the critical explanation of much of Shyamalan’s work. Be it the wretched VILLAGE or LADY IN THE WATER he’s had a lot of movies go the way of box office bust. Films like SIXTH SENSE and UNBREAKABLE make you scratch your head about where is the consistency in what he does.

I am uplifted, though, by this trailer.

No one more than me could be amazed by the meteoric rise (and what a strange idiom; don’t meteors fall from the sky?) of Marky Mark. The guy’s been absolutely grand in movies like THE DEPARTED and BOOGIE NIGHTS and so many others that he comes off just as well here.

The trailer does a little something extra and it’s almost too subtle to notice its strength; we’re allowed to get extended scenes here and get a feel for the pacing, the cinematography and genuine feel for the movie proper.

A discussion about the disappearance of bees has lofted a few plausible thoughts but since this is a Shyamalan flick you’ve got to go to bizzaro lengths to get a good idea to one suitable for him. Hence, the bee idea is taken to its most implausible degree and applied to human beings. Not that I’m breaking bad on the trailer because I’m not. You’ve got a logical beginning, no Voiceover Guy pushing his way into our understanding of this film and a neat segue into a beat cop walking on the street one minute and, the next, dead on the street.

This film’s bizarre-ness is taken a step further in the auditorium meeting with Cameron Frye who starts the proceedings with being ambiguous about what’s happening to people. Now, I get the populist red herring that the Homeland Security, CDC, virus attack grand scale thinking that this could be a terrorist thing is one way to proceed (the trailer does a good job in setting that theory in motion) but the cheesy 80’s retro rock instrumental music is a bit odd. However, the way that this is handled is quite effective. For a movie that is going to be hanging that fist low, ready to pop you in the jaw at the very end in that Shyamalan way, the pieces that we’ve been given here are enough to make you wonder what is It. What will It be?

I’m not quite sure I know what the surprise ending will be when you hear that it really won’t be a terrorist attack (it would be an all too easy way out and I am sure some in Middle America are going to be floored that it’s got nothing to do with terrorist killers) but the real thing that should be apparent to everyone is that M. Night is never going to change.

His style, his perspective on things, the almost generic way he sets his shots up, you’ve got to believe he lives and dies by his writing. Like others who won’t give up the directorial duties to someone else, you’ve got to know it’s a ballsy move to make a movie where you remove one-half of what could carry you through if one part suffers, Hence, that’s why this film’s trailer does well: the story at least has an intriguing premise. Now, whether he can create a sustainable story is another.

But to see those guys falling off the roof? Show me more”¦

Weekend Shopping Guide 3/7/08: Dalmatians In The Wild

Filed under: Shopping Guides — UncaScroogeMcD @ 5:07 am

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The weekend’s here. You’ve just been paid, and it’s burning a hole in your pocket. What’s a pop culture geek to do? In hopes of steering you in the right direction to blow some of that hard-earned cash, it’s time for the Quick Stop Weekend Shopping Guide – your spotlight on the things you didn’t even know you wanted…

It’s been years since the limited edition release of 101 Dalmatians (Walt Disney, Rated G, DVD-$29.99 SRP), but the classic tale of Pongo & Perdie’s pups and the threat of Dalmatian coat fanatic Cruella DeVille has finally gotten its own 2-disc platinum edition. Looking better than ever, bonus materials include a making-of featurette, a look at correspondence between Walt and the book’s author, a spotlight on the inspiration for Cruella, deleted songs, and more. Now when will we get that special edition of Song of the South?

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As if further proof of the arbitrary uselessness of the Oscars was needed, let’s look at the case of Into The Wild (Paramount, Rated R, DVD-$35.98 SRP) – a rather wonderful little film about the real life story of Christopher McCandless (Emile Hirsch), who gave up his comfortable lifestyle to go on an ultimately doomed wilderness walkabout – which the Oscars snubbed save for a deserved nod to Hal Holbrook. I can only hope that audiences will discover the flick on DVD. Bonus features include an in-depth look at the backstory and the making of the film.

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I’m glad that, in recent years, the largely lackluster early-80’s period of Saturday Night Live has been allowed to come in from the cold and at least have its existence, on an official level, be acknowledged. Just a few years ago, I don’t think we would have gotten a documentary examining the totality of that decade like the wonderful SNL In The 80’s: Lost and Found (Universal, Not Rated, DVD-$19.98 SRP). Packed with interviews representing all those casts and writers, it’s a nice complement to the SNL: The First Five Years doc. The disc also contains an additional hour of interviews and clips. While you’re at it, you might as well pick up the SNL: Best Of ’06/’07 (Universal, Not Rated, DVD-$19.98 SRP), which also contains an audio commentary, dress sketches, and Update outtakes.

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Its release was delayed a few months due to printing issues, but the newest issue of Uncle Scrooge – #372 (Gemstone, $7.99 SRP) – is now available, and it’s a very nice celebration of Scrooge’s 60th anniversary. Not only is creator Carl Barks’s “Christmas On Bear Mountain” – the story that introduced the loveable miser – in there, but there’s also stories from Don Rosa and Tony Strobyl, and a poster y Rosa celebrating the anniversary.

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There is a threshold over which a director with a unique vision becomes a director with annoying affectations. With The Darjeeling Limited (Fox, Rated R, DVD-$29.99 SRP), Wes Anderson has proven to me that the annoying, cloying qualities of The Life Aquatic were not merely a blip, but a precedent. Like the characters of Aquatic, I find that all of those directorial affectations – and Anderson’s seemingly perpetual fascination with upper class familial dysfunction – make me less than affectionate for the trio of brothers whose Indian reunion after a year-long lack of communication is the focus of the flick. It’s a shame, because I loved Rushmore, and I liked Royal Tenenbaums, and there is a watchable film somewhere in the 90-minute that feels like 3-hours Darjeeling. Bonus features include the short film Hotel Chevalier and a making-of documentary.

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Straight from Terry Pratchett’s Discworld comes the tale of the Hogfather (Sony, Not Rated, DVD-$14.95 SRP) – the beloved patron of the holiday Hogswatch, who delivers gifts to the boys and girls. However, there are parties who want the Hogfather out of the way, and it’s up to an oddball group of heroes to sort it all out. Bonus features include an interview with Pratchett and the original trailer.

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Ah, pre-Code Hollywood – an era in the 30’s when cinema wasn’t restrained by content restrictions and was free to put any vice they wanted onscreen, which wouldn’t happen again until filmmakers the 70’s broke down the walls of the industry’s puritan Production Code. The second Forbidden Hollywood Collection (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$49.98 SRP) features another 5 pre-code flicks – The Divorcee, A Free Soul, Three On A Match, Female, and Night Nurse, fully restored. Bonus features include an all-new documentary on pre-Code Hollywood, audio commentaries on The Divorcee and Night Nurse, and theatrical trailers.

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If you want a quick and easy way to add a quartet of must-have comedy classics from a legendary filmmaker to your collection, snap up a copy of the Billy Wilder Film Collection (MGM/UA, Not Rated, DVD-$39.98 SRP). The flicks included in the set are the special editions of The Apartment and Some Like It Hot, and the featureless editions of Kiss Me, Stupid and The Fortune Cookie.

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It seems like you can’t take a step nowadays without hitting a new sketch comedy group. One of the better newcomers is Human Giant (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$26.98 SRP), whose anarchic blend is like a Python puree. The 2-disc first season set features the best of their 24-hour MTV marathon, deleted scenes & improv, unaired sketches, audio commentary, live footage, and more.

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A powerful flick with a still-stellar cast gets a much-deserved revisiting with the special edition of 12 Angry Men (MGM/UA, Not Rated, DVD-$19.98 SRP). In addition to a remastered picture, the disc also contains an audio commentary (with film historian Drew Casper), a making-of featurette, and a featurette on the cast.

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Often overlooked in favor of The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, Horton Hears A Who (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$19.98 SRP) is another wonderful pairing of Dr. Suess and Chuck Jones that has, thankfully, gotten a brand new special edition and looks better than ever. Bonus features include the documentary In Search Of Dr. Seuss, 3 more animated tales (Dr. Seuss’ Butter Battle Book, Daisy-Head Mayzie, and Horton Hatches The Egg!), and a sing-along video.

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Richard Kimble is still on the run in the second volume of The Fugitive‘s inaugural season (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$36.98 SRP). Fully remastered and still at the top of its game, the 4-disc set features the remaining 15 episodes. These episodes have never looked this good in syndication – and I’d go so far as to say their original airing wasn’t this good looking, either.

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If you were to strip away all of the subversive energy and surreal delights of Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory and transplant the dull, lifeless corpse into a garishly colorful toy store run by the titular eccentric of Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium (Fox, Rated G, DVD-$29.99 SRP), you’d get a zombified dullfest that makes you wonder why everyone didn’t just stay home. Dustin Hoffman does his best Robert DeNiro in The Adventures Of Rocky & Bullwinkle, while Natalie Portman and Jason Bateman are obviously just marking time. Bonus features include a quartet of behind-the-scenes featurettes.

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Time and again, my theory that everything will get a feature-laden DVD re-release is proven. This time, it’s a new 2-disc edition of Mrs. Doubtfire (Fox, Rated PG-13, DVD-$19.98 SRP), featuring deleted/extended/alternate scenes, production and retrospective featurettes, an interview with Chuck Jones about the film’s opening animation (along with the pencil test and final animation sequence), make-up application and tests, improvisations, the original 1993 featurette, publicity stills, trailers, and more.

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All good things must come to an end, and 2- years after the show’s end, so do the DVD releases of Magnum P.I. with the release of season eight (Universal, Not Rated, DVD-$49.98 SRP). The 3-disc set features all 13 episodes, plus audio commentaries and a bonus episode of The Rockford Files.

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Fans of Cartoon Network’s Storm Hawks (Sony, Not Rated, DVD-$29.95 SRP) will want to snag a copy of the 2-disc Heroes Of The Sky set, featuring the first 13 episodes of the series.

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If you find yourself craving something exciting and new, then you’re out of luck, because the episodes featured in the Season One: Volume One of that nautical soap bubble The Love Boat (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$36.98 SRP) are over 30 years old. Yes, it really has been that long since Captain Stubing captained the Pacific Princess across the sea, packed with more odd guest stars than old school Batman and Laugh-In combined. This 3-disc set features the first 12 episodes, as well as the original episode promos. Nowhere, however, does Isaac provide any mixology lessons.

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Young Marla Olmstead was hailed as a child prodigy, with paintings compared to Jackson Pollock which began to fetch hundreds of thousands of dollars. However, it all came crashing down when accusations were levied that her amateur artist father was really the one doing the painting. All of this is explored in the fascinating documentary My Kid Could Paint That (Sony, Rated PG-13, DVD-$24.96 SRP), which goes a long way towards illuminating just how ridiculous the art world is. Bonus features include an audio commentary, a featurette, and a follow-up piece.

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So there you have it… my humble suggestions for what to watch, listen to, play with, or waste money on this coming weekend. See ya next week…

-Ken Plume

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Comics & Comics: Wrath of Caan

Filed under: Columns,Comics and Comics — admin @ 3:45 am

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Howdy Inter-Webbers, I’m Matt Cohen, and I’m funny.

I’m really funny. Like, soul crushingly so. Even I can admit that there are a few (a very few) funnier then I, and here is a peek at what some of them are up to. So take off your thinking caps, and don your tuxedo tees, cause its time to share in the laughter.

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Big Screen

Semi-Pro: The first solo flick from writer (and UCB alumni) Scott Armstrong puts Will Ferrell into the “lead” role of yet another sports comedy, this time a basketball film, and amazingly another very funny movie is born. Plot-wise, Semi-Pro is nothing groundbreaking and often pretty thin but that doesn’t stop Ferrell and Co. from packing in the laughs. Ferrell stars as Jackie Moon, owner, coach and power forward of the struggling ABA club, The Flint Michigan Tropics, a loud, boisterous and yet extremely likable fool of a man. The film, set in the mid seventies, finds Moon and the rest of his squad struggling to secure a place in the NBA, after the impending mergers between the two organizations. Ferrell, in an out of ordinary move, takes backseat in the film, to the supporting cast, particularly Woody Harrelson as a washed up former pro, and Andre Benjamin as a young talented upstart. The marketing of the film is misleading in this regard, because I fully expected to go in a see a Will Ferrell movie. Not to say I was disappointed with the overall outcome, just that Jackie Moon definitely is not the focus of Semi-Pro, and though Ferrell kills in his on-screen time, I really would be hard pressed to consider him the lead of the film. Semi-Pro is filled with an excellent supporting cast; particularly Will Arnett and Andy Daily steal the show, as the two Tropics radio commentators. This movie isn’t quite as funny as Anchorman or Talladega Nights, but those are two brilliant films in my opinion, and living up to that level of excellence is hard to do. Semi-Pro is a very funny movie, not perfect, but definitely worth checking out.

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“If I sink this shot, I’m taking the whole team to Carvel for sundaes and fun!”

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Films to Look for:

Stepbrothers: After about three viewings of the trailer, I have come to the conclusion that this looks like one of the funniest movies of the year, if not the last few years. Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly re-team, this time as the titular step brothers, two thirty something men who find themselves sharing a bedroom with a complete stranger. The trailer is short, but glorious. The two men quickly find themselves going from bitter enemies to best friends, and the transition looks to be hilarious (John Stamos!!!). This is the first team up between Ferrell, Reilly and director Adam Mckay since Talladega Nights hit theaters, and it appears as if the wait has been worth it. I know people who are already quoting one liners from the film, and thats just after seeing a short preview. In Taladega Nights Ferrell and Reilly proved they are a great comedy twosome, and Stepbrothers looks like its certainly going to solidify that.

Pineapple Express: A 40-something second trailer containing guns, pot, and a song by M.I.A. (Paper Planes), and with that, I was completely and fully hooked. The trailer for Pineapple Express is an odd bird, to say the least and that may be why I’m so intrigued/excited by the film. Seth Rogen and and James Franco (In fully on hippy Jesus look-alike mode) star in a film written by Rogen and partner Evan Goldberg (the same team behind this summers Superbad) and directed by David Gordon Green of all people. If you are unfamiliar, Green is a renowned director of hard hitting, intense low budget films, such as All the real girls and the indie fave George Washington. This is not going to be a typical comedy. Early advances say that the film is “too dark” for most average comedy goers, some even saying disturbingly so. I’m a fan of all the folks involved, and a fan of the content as well, so this film is high (I’m clever) up on my radar of movies to see in 08.

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“Alright, just wait for it and that picnic basket is ours!”

Baby Mama: Tina Fey and Amy Poehler star as a single working woman (Tina Fey) and her surrogate mother to be (Poehler) in this upcoming comedy. Written by Fey, it is her first starring vehicle since her newfound fame on TV’S 30 Rock., and the trailer looks like she has hit a line drive first time up at bat. The movie is sweet, but not nauseatingly so, and Poehler’s character looks to be one of the ditziest/funniest female I have seen onscreen in a long time. Fey seems to be staying in her usual “Straight-Woman” territory, but that is where she excels so you’ll hear no complaints from me. This will also be Poehler’s first co-lead and I personally think its about time, because in my opinion Amy is the funniest women alive. With two stellar leads like this film has, I think Baby Mama is one to watch for.

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DVD Review

Human Giant Season 1: Its no secret that I am a huge fan of this series, and the DVD offering of the first season does not disappoint viewers, hard-core or newcomers alike. This two-disc set comes jam packed with uncensored extras, best of clips from the 24 hour Human Giant MTV marathon and loads more. The most important part of a sketch show is the sketches of course, and lucky for us, Human Giant knows how to provide the funny, on a more consistent basis then any sketch show I’ve seen in a long time. With this two disc set, the viewer gets every uncensored episode from season 1, three hours of bonus features and an infinitely larger amount of laughs. So if you’ve seen the show, or you are a noob, pick up this set and I can guarantee you will laugh till your eyes hurt, take a break, and then laugh again.

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One of these men is really large. (Hint: It’s not the little one)

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Well, thats it for this week. Check back in a fortnight (I’m very cultured) for a look at next weeks comics, and special guest Jesse gives us his opinion on the much celebrated, Batman: The Animated Series. Be there or be square… And squares are no fun. Four sides…. Pft!

and as always,

“Keep em’ bagged and boarded”

–Matt Cohen is trying to build a mountain out of a mole hill, but the moles are being real jerks about it.

Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 3/7/2008

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:23 am

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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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March 6, 2008

Party Favors: Billy Mays For President

Filed under: Columns,Joe Corey's Party Favors — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:07 am

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partyfavors2008-03-06.jpgDENVER – This year it sucks to be a vice presidential candidate.

The Democratic Convention isn’t till the end of August. The Republicans meet the first week in September. Does it really take this long for the delegates to construct donkey and elephant themed hats?

This means we’ll get six months of “Guess the Vice President.” Brace yourself for reporters ending every interview with a politician with: “Would you accept the job of Vice President if it’s offered?” It’s like adding “in bed” to a fortune cookie message. MSNBC already asked it to Elmo if he’s ready to replace Dick Cheney on the ticket. He’s hot the red states. Although my support for the future V.P. is pitchman Billy Mays. He knows how to promote American innovation and products. Which nominee will nab the man who gave us Oxiclean? Neither candidate is going to tip their VP choice since that’s what creates real surprise at the convention. Nobody in May will be wearing a “Second In Command In Training” vest. It’s an infernal pundit guessing game meant to last all summer long.

Coincidentally Jeff Zucker at NBC is already planning a new arena gameshow entitled, Are You Willing to Accept the Job of Vice President? It will follow their upcoming slate of “competitive reality shows” that includes What’s In My Pocket?, How Much Does Your Belly Button Lint Weigh?, and Black Sock or Navy Blue Sock?

Why exactly is a major TV network wasting an hour with My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad? Remember when this show was on Nickelodeon and called something like Family Style Double Dare? Why does NBC run it at 9 p.m. on a Monday? That’s pretty late for a school night. They can call it, My Dad Doesn’t Care What Time I Go to Bed. Hasn’t NBC news run news reports about how kids need to get more sleep. And now they do this? Jeff Zucker doesn’t care that your kids don’t get to bed till 10 p.m. Get with your own truths, star of Fat Actress.

NBC’s Amnesia is even worse as a gameshow. I don’t care if people can remember their fifth grade teacher. Why does Dennis Miller keep having a career? Has he used his Thesaurus joke on the show yet? He’s like that wad of bubblegum you swallowed in second grade that you swear is still stuck in your small intestine. In Japan, if someone had failed as pathetically as Miller did on Monday Night Football, he’d commit ritualistic seppuku. Celebrity Seppuku would be perfect for VH1. Whatever happened to giving the people what they really want?

LOL GOP

Everyone keeps claiming that Fox News is the propaganda machine of the Republican Party, but they’re wrong. Comedy Central is the true Kingmaker of this year’s GOP. You need proof? Gov. Mitt Romney and Mayor Rudy Giuliani were on Fox News as much as Bill O’Reilly and Shepard Smith. There were rumors that certain Fox News insiders were White House bound when either of their candidates became elected. But a funny thing happened on the way to the convention: Mitt and Rudy flailed, failed and bailed.

Why?

The Colbert Bounce and the Daily Show Phenomena devastated Fox’s favorite sons. Mike Huckabee was as unknown as that freakish senator from Alaska. But then he was clutched into Stephen Colbert’s patriotic bosom. This quasi-endorsement allowed the Arkansas governor to win primaries while Mayor Rudy fled to Florida to blow his campaign chest on a “fire wall” vote.

McCain was ignored by Fox News who decided he wasn’t worth their Campaign Carl exclusives. Fox trademarked “America’s Mayor” for Rudy. Mitt was practically co-host of Your World With Neil Cavuto. Jack Welch was jealous at Neil spending so much face time with “The Man Who Saved the Winter Olympics.” McCain didn’t even have a Roger Ailes endorsed nickname. But there was always a warm seat on The Daily Show set for McCain. Jon Stewart didn’t completely faun over him like Cavuto’s tongue slicking back Mitt’s hair. Stewart took the senator to task for going back on his straight talk – especially when he sucked up to the forces that ambushed him in South Carolina during the 2000 election. But at least Stewart cared enough to talk to McCain unlike that Fair and Balanced News Channel. And now who is in the catbird’s seat? How does Roger Ailes feel with the knowledge that his machine was derailed by a fake news show or more properly expressed, “An openly fake news show?”

When it comes time for press coverage from the convention floor in Minneapolis, Colbert and Stewart should walk the floor not merely as fake news reporters, but as the swizzle stick that stirs the GOP drink. Forget Rush, Coulter and Roger Ailes, future Republican presidential candidates better kiss the true rings of power.

OSCAR GOREY

There’s only one way to save the Oscar’s ratings – the 2009 host must be Gary Busey. Imagine the look of panic in the eyes of Helen Mirren when she realizes her path to the Golden Boy goes through the arms of Busey.

Instead of the memorial montage, a psychic should predict which Academy members will be in the grave before the next ceremony. Extreme close-ups will capture the shock of those marked for death.

KISS AND DEFLATE

Remember when Gene Simmons wanted us to call him Dr. Love? Thanks to the unexpected release of his sex tape, he’s now been reduced to Orderly Perfunctory.

The Kiss frontman has spent the last three decades bragging about his sexual powers. Has he ever done an interview with a female reporter that didn’t include him hitting on her? He tempts them with his tongue and the treasure restrained by his codpiece. He was going to rock and roll them all night.

Even on the recent Apprentice, Gene sold himself as God’s Gift to women. Did he not lock his sunglasses on Ivanka Trump’s rack? He swore the Manhattan socialite wanted to understand “Detroit Rock City.” He passed himself off as a stud on A&E’s Family Jewels. America bought into the legend that Gene Simmons at nearly 60 still had the mojo.

But then the video of Gene boffing a blond with heavily augmented breasts hit the internet. Instead of fans of Family Jewels rejoicing at this carnal find, there was a complete letdown. “My eyes!” they screamed as if they opened up the ark of the covenant.

There’s nothing sexy about Gene’s seduction. He keeps his t-shirt on as if he was the second coming of Ed Powers. He doesn’t even remove his pants from around his ankles. This dress code only acceptable for scoring with the ladies in toilet stalls. Gene doesn’t use his legendary tongue for foreplay. He pulls a Col. Sanders. He licks his fingers to moist up her extra crispy giblet. There’s no kissing. The woman does her best to not look directly at Gene’s face while he half-heartedly schtumps away on her. She wants to imagine him in full make up as the Demon and not face the reality of Gene’s aged sourpuss face.

She wears her flip-flops onto the bed. Is she afraid of catching a foot fungus from Gene? This is not a sexy sexual encounter. Michael Jackson’s turkey baster is more romantic with the ladies.

As far as sex tapes go, this is a complete disaster. It makes Kim K Superstar look like Last Tango In Paris. The Johns in Brent Owens’ Hookers At the Point series have more seductive moves than Gene. For the upcoming season of Family Jewels, A&E is running a promotional campaign for people to vote if Gene really had sex with 4,800 women. Who couldn’t have sex with 4,800 women at $20 a pop? They even have a billboards up with the number – as if Gene was the McDonald’s of Groupie Sex. If you notice, it only says “4,800 women” and not “4,800 satisfied women.”

Even worse is Gene telling people that the sex video is from five years ago. That means he was younger when he screwed the blond as if he was taking out the garbage. The nice thought is that Gene can get some crossover action by having this footage featured on a very special episode of Discovery’s Mythbusters.

THE DVD SHELF

The writer’s strike might be over, but that doesn’t mean you have to give up watching DVDs for broadcast TV. Here’s a few new arrivals that have piled up on the Grand Wega.

Beowulf was much more fun to watch than the version inflicted upon us in English 112. The battle scene between Beowulf and Grendel was pretty damn intense. But the tension was undercut when they kept coming up with Austin Powers gimmicks to hide Beowulf’s cyber dong from the camera’s view. Seeing how I’m watching the “Unrated Director’s Cut,” why couldn’t they allow Beowulf Jr. to flap freely in the heat of combat? And what’s up with Angelina Jolie having the same accent as Beaky Buzzard’s mom from the Looney Tunes cartoons?

Mod Squad: Season One, Volume 2makes me wonder how can any criminal resist the pout of Julie Barnes (played by Peggy Lipton)? She knows how to make the kindest soul feel guilty. The second half of the first season keeps up the fun as the young undercover police trio bust old criminals and save groovy chicks. They survive a plane crash in “Flight Five Doesn’t Answer.” They saddle up as undercover cowboys in “Fear Is the Bucking Horse.” The prime episode of boxset is “Keep the Faith, Baby” with Sammy Davis Jr. as a priest and Robert Duvall as killer. Julie, Pete (Michael Cole) and Linc keep it solid with their crimefighting skills. Youngsters should recognize Linc since Clarence Williams III played the Harlem crime boss Bumpy Johnson in American Gangster.

Love American Style: Season 1, Volume 2 keeps the love coming from the greatest kitsch series of the Seventies. Two of my favorite episodes are included. Both involve Batman stars. “Love and the Big Night” has Tony Randall get his shot at Julie Newmar. She’s the swinging secretary that enjoys shagging the married guys at work. Felix gets his freak on with Catwoman. Big warning – you do see Tony’s bare chest. “Love and the Great Catch” has Adam West playing himself while visiting George Lindsey. Batman tangles with Goober! The true joy of Love American Style is having TV and film icons tangle on a neutral show.

Love Boat: Season One, Volume 1 took over from Love American Style in allowing stars a chance to act outside of their sitcoms. Jim Nabors, Tab Hunter, Robert Hegyes, Sandy Duncan, Jane Curtain and James Bond III all boarded the Pacific Princess in search of amore. The series launched the coolest bartender to sail the high seas in Isaac Washington (Ted Lange). He revolutionized the mixologist in pop culture. The show pure mindless fun. The Love Boat mocked the viewers since it was quite obvious that if you were watching it on Saturday nights, you weren’t getting much love. You weren’t heading off to a romantic location. Spending time with Gopher allowed America feel that they weren’t that lonely.

101 Dalmatians: Platinum Edition is a major upgrade from the 1999 barebones release. This Disney animated classic deals with sweet Cruella De Vil’s dream of collecting enough puppies to make herself a Dalmatian coat. The puppies decide that they don’t want to sacrifice their lives for fashion. What would Tim Gunn say about this? There’s tons of bonus stuff including a 33 minute documentary about the film and legendary animator Marc Davis discussing Cruella.

No Country for Old Men was the only Oscar nominated film that lured me into paying full price. And it won the golden boy. I still have nightmares of checking into the wrong hotel room and discovering Anton Chigurh. Javier Bardem (better known to Regis as Xavier) gives a Terminator level performance as the killer who can’t be stopped when he’s on a mission. Josh Brolin plays the man who stumbles upon drug loot and thus becomes Anton’s next target. One of my favorite films of 2007.

Flight 29 Down: Season Two is Lost for kids except it doesn’t confuse you with timelines, polar bears and giant magnets. A pack of kids attempt to survive after being stranded on a tropical island. The entire series wraps up on Tango Hotel: Series Finale. Remembering my school days, I’d be the first to resort to cannibalism.

Things We Lost in the Fire reminds us that Halle Berry winning the Oscar wasn’t a career fluke. She can act in films that aren’t completely dumb like Catwoman. She plays a mom struggling with a tragic event. She thinks she finds a steady hand with Benicio Del Toro, but he’s got his own demons. This film could have easily devolved into a Lifetime movie, but the performances keep it from going off the tracks.

Into the Wild is the creepy tale of Chris McCandless. After graduating from college, he gave away all of his possessions and trekked into Alaska. Sean Penn does a magnificent job at showing the rush McCandless must have felt on his journey. Not to spoil the ending, but it’s not the feel good hit of the year. This would make a great double feature with Werner Herzog’s Grizzly Man.

Descent has ended any sexual fantasies involving Rosario Dawson. She plays a college girl that’s sexually attacked by a classmate. She plots a really nasty revenge on her date rapist. Fans of Frank Zappa’s “Bobby Brown” won’t wince as much as the rest of us. Make sure you get the NC-17 cut for the complete “AHHHHHH!” factor.

Trading Spaces: Specials is a great way to distract the wife when you need private time during March Madness. The DVD has 4 of the hour long specials including “Trading Castles.” Paige Davis hosts two of them. It’s nice to see TLC has brought her back to host the show. Did you know that designer Hildi Santo Tomas worked for Sen. Jesse Helms?

IS PARIS ITCHING?

I’m applying for the “Be Paris Hilton’s New Best Friend” MTV reality show. First I’ll have to host my own VH1 reality show to help me win her show. “Corey Connection” allows drug dealers to compete for my “friendship.” Can aspiring Tony Montanas get me anything that Paris wants at 4 a.m.? A year after my victory as Paris’ new best friend, I’ll be hosting “Don’t Scratch That!” from the Center for Disease Control.

TODAY TOMORROW TONIGHT

According the Magic 8 Ball, Jay Leno won’t be leaving NBC when he steps down from hosting the Tonight Show. Jeff Zucker will have Jay host the upcoming fifth hour of the Today Show.

There will be a nasty ratings dive for the Tonight Show if Leno goes to ABC or Fox. While Conan has his followers, he attracts a different audience than Leno. More people tune into Conan after watching Letterman. A drinking buddy at a certain ratings service says that at least 20% of Conan’s “audience” is comprised of people who fall asleep during Leno. While Conan might have done well against Letterman and Kimmel, he’s dead meat if Leno sticks around at 11:35 on ABC or 11:00 on Fox.

Zucker’s wooing Jon Stewart for Late Night to replace Conan. But sources, who have seen Jon on TMZ, claim he has no intention to give up The Daily Show. What’s the point of moving from 11 p.m. to 12:35 a.m.? Stewart enjoys being able to keep up a daylight audience with the constant replays on Comedy Central. Plus he’s the GOP Kingmaker. Conan can’t even get a Dr. Pibb at the NBC commissary. The dark horse candidate for Late Night is The Daily Show‘s Rob Riggle. Carson Daly hosting the hour is considered the “If terrorists blow up New York and Los Angeles while Carson Daly is golfing in Texas” option.

Zucker can always mix things up by having a two and a half hour late night Deal or No Deal or American Gladiators Afterdark.

MORE NBC GAME SHOWS

Our man in Burbank has slipped us the top secret list of all the game shows Jeff Zucker is pondering for upcoming prime time schedule.

Arf Arf – Contestants have to match dogs with their owners.

Patient Zero – Guess who gave everyone in a group of people a communicable disease.

I Got Your Nose – A contestant has to guess which of five people truly has their nose sticking out of their fists.

National Peek-A-Boo Night – America wonders where the host has gone when he covers his face with his hands. Riveting TV, Tom Shales will declare.

Fresh or Sour – Contestants have to guess the expiration date of milk.

What Did I Have For Lunch – Contestant gets a fart in the face and has to identify the foods in the gas.

Do You Know Who I Am? – Drunk celebrities avoid being arrested for drunk driving by flaunting their star power.

Know that Colon – Can you spot your spouse’s colon when a cam’s been shoved up it?

ROCK OF SHOTS

Faithful reader Zan W. pondered a great question: Is Bret Michaels auditioning for Wilford Brimley’s Liberty Medical gig? Both men spending most of their time on TV talking about their diabetes. As soon as Bret wraps on Rock Of Love 22, he’ll be ready to tell us how to order all your diabetic supplies.

If Bret really wants to be the new Wilford, he’s going to have to drop the bandana action. Wilford doesn’t mind showing off his sexy scalp. How much hair is really attached to Bret’s dome? A recent Rock of Love had a girl “surprise” Bret with breakfast in bed. She allegedly woke him up. He still had the bandana on. How many hours did Bret have to prepare himself for the “surprise?”

Brace yourself: MyNetwork will be airing a sitcom starring Flavor Flav called Under One Roof. Expect to see a rise in reports of people ripping their eyes out.

END THE PAIN

I fear being trapped in a theater watching Mike Myers’ The Love Guru. My eye are already hurting from the trailer. Please tell me that this isn’t really a movie, but a fake trailer spoofing the cinema of Myers.

At some point I’ll see Semi-Pro since Jackie Earle Haley plays a rabid fan of the Flint Tropics. It’ll probably be a matinee.

OPRAH’S BIG GIVE

What would I do if Oprah handed me a pile of money? I’d give her directions to where Gayle King is buried alive.

The press went nuts with the announcement that Discovery Health Channel will become OWN: The Oprah Winfrey Network. There was buzz that Oprah would revolutionize TV with uplifting programs for her followers. Remember when Oprah pushed the Oxygen Channel? The station devolved into continuous marathons of Bad Girls Club and Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency. What the hell went wrong with that channel? How did it go from empowering women to exploiting them like a trainwreck version of Girls Gone Wild? Does Oprah feel bad that she birthed this bastion of trash TV that exists to give E!’s The Soup classic highlights? OWN will feature Gayle King’s Ultimate Jell-O Wresting Academy by the end of the year.

FINAL UPCOMING NBC SHOW

Did I Wash This Underwear? – Can be played on To Catch A Predator with the pervs before Chris Hansen steps out from behind the screen.

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