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December 11, 2006

QSE News: 12/11/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:07 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgComedy Central is set to air a new satirical cartoon named Lil’ Bush. The cartoon will follow a younger version of Bush and some of his friends as they make their way through elementary school. To keep the show as authentic as possible the show will remain on the air regardless of whether or not the majority of the United States population likes it.
  • Ice Cube and Snoop Dogg are pairing up for a tour of Canada. All 14 Black people in Canada are reportedly “totally stoked.”
  • Nerd’s rejoice!!  After months of speculation, it has been confirmed that director J.J. Abrams will helm a new Star Trek prequel movie scheduled to hit theaters in 2009.  When asked for comment, one fan, who was seen wearing pointy, prosthetic ears and peering at the outside world from a basement window in his parent’s home, proclaimed, in perfect Klingon, “Kluck ha gamog!!  Kluck ha gamog!!!”
  • Metallica has written 25 songs for a new album. Commenting on the style of the new songs, drummer Lars Ulrich said “In my day we didn’t have these fancy recordin’ contraptions that they have now-a-days. We use to record using wax and a needle stolen from our mother’s wretching machine.”
  • And finally, Mariah Carey is suing a porn star over the use of a similar name. Porn star Mary Carey responded to the suit saying “Oh yeah”¦ You like that? Oh. Give it to me. Harder. Faster.  Yeah, that’s it.  You’re a dirty boy.”
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That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 12/11/2006

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:56 am
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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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  • Jim Henson performs Kermit the Frog, accepting some special holiday tidings from Michael Eisner. (Thingamabob)
  • The Fraggles celebrate the Festival of the Bells… (Thingamabob)
  • “Listen, and hear what I say, for a change…” (Thingamabob)
  • Robbie Williams on Ant & Dec’s Christmas Takeaway(Thingamabob)

Have a THINGAMABOB? Send it in!

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December 8, 2006

Comics in Context #157: Our Nation’s Cartoons

Filed under: Columns,Comics in Context — admin @ 10:50 pm
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cic2006-12-08.jpgFrom its founding right through the end of the twentieth century, The New York Times would not run comics and did not even employ an editorial cartoonist. Presumably the Times considered comics and cartoons too déclassé for a serious, proper newspaper like itself, in contrast to its tabloid competition. The flagrant exception to the Times‘ rule were Al Hirschfeld’s caricatures of Broadway and Hollywood performers in the Arts and Leisure Section, but Hirschfeld reportedly considered himself an “illustrator,” not a “cartoonist.” In the School of Visual Arts’ current Jules Feiffer retrospective, there is a comics page that Feiffer did for The New York Times Sunday Magazine in 1974 that is satirically presented as the kind of comics the Times would run if it ran comics: titled “Hodgkins of State,” it is an (intentionally) deadly dull policy discussion by two members of the foreign service.

But now look at this year’s annual Holiday Books issue of The New York Times Book Review (Dec. 3, 2006). On the list of the “100 Notable Books of the Year” is Alison Bechtel’s Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic, which the Times helpfully classifies as a “graphic memoir,” solving the problem of what to call a book in the graphic novel format that deals in nonfictional autobiography. Ivan Brunetti’s An Anthology of Graphic Fiction, Cartoons, and True Stories, including work by Daniel Clowes, Robert Crumb, Art Spiegelman, and Chris Ware, receives a review that takes up two entire pages. (The “Speak: Nine Cartoonists” exhibition in New York City earlier this year served as a preview of this book. See “Comics in Context” #122.) The author of this review, David Hadju, writes that “If anyone really qualifies as the voice of the current literary generation, he or she could well be using the language of cartoons, captions and word balloons.” There is a “Holiday” roundup review headed “comics,” covering Will Eisner’s New York: Life in the Big City, Marjane Satrapi’s Chicken with Plums, and a new volume of George Herriman’s Krazy & Ignatz, among others, written by Douglas Wolk, one of my colleagues at Publishers Weekly’s Comics Week. (It is a pleasure to see the Times assign a comics review to someone who actually has a background in writing about the medium.) Another “Holiday” roundup, on “Drawings,” includes not only a collection of the work of Saul Steinberg, who long ago was welcomed into the precincts of high art, but also caricaturist Drew Friedman’s book Old Jewish Comedians, and a book called The Sweeter Side of R. Crumb, which, by Crumb’s own description, contains “adorable, heartwarming, and lovingly rendered drawings.” This makes me think of the “lovingly rendered” drawings of women I was surprised to find in the Crumb section of the “Masters of American Comics” exhibit (see last week’s column). Scott McCloud classifies Crumb as an Iconoclast, who strives to convey truth about life rather than artistic craft and beauty; perhaps this book shows not just the sweeter but the Classicist side of Crumb. This Holiday Books edition also includes reviews of Neil Gabler’s massive new biography of Walt Disney (about which I will have more to say next week) and Linda H. Davis’s biography of Charles Addams. There’s even a critique of a book called Presidential Doodles: Two Centuries of Scribbles, Scratches, Squiggles and Scrawls from the Oval Office. And meanwhile the Times continues to run a weekly comic by Seth in its Sunday magazine section.

A decade ago the Times would have run reviews of biographies of Disney and Addams. Regardless of whether or not one admires his work, Disney is recognized as a major figure in American popular culture. Moreover, back in the twentieth century some forms of comics and cartoon art had more cultural respectability than others. One of those categories was the cartoons in The New Yorker, including those by Addams, who donated his artwork to the New York Public Library, which for years has been displaying them in their own gallery (see “Comics in Context” #72). Even when I was a child my local library in a Boston suburb carried book collections of editorial cartoons (including those by Herblock), histories of newspaper comic strips, a 1940 coffee table book about the making of Disney’s Fantasia, and even some collections of comic strips, notably Walt Kelly’s Pogo, whose political satire won it cultural respectability, as Doonesbury would receive later.

Still, the considerable amount of space that this year’s Holiday Books issue of the Times Book Review devotes to comic and cartoon art is mightily impressive. In his review of Brunetti’s anthology, Hajdu writes that “Among the events that helped establish jazz as a serious art was the concert “˜From Spirituals to Swing,’ staged at Carnegie Hall in 1932,” which “brought together an eclectic array of African-American musicians. . . in the same hall famous for presenting Stokowski, Toscanini, and their high-toned like.” Hajdu believes that Brunetti’s book serve the same purpose for comics. To my mind, Yale University Press’s publication of the Brunetti book is merely one of a number of events in 2006 that mark the comics medium’s transition into cultural respectability. This issue of the Times Book Review is another, and “Masters of American Comics” may be the foremost.

It’s not just the museums and galleries of New York City that have been celebrating the comics medium this year. The Friday after Thanksgiving I made a day trip down to Washington D. C. to visit the Library of Congress to see its current exhibition “Cartoon America: Highlights from the Art Wood Collection of Cartoon and Caricature,” which runs through January 27, 2007. In connection with the show, Harry N. Abrams has published the book Cartoon America: Comic Art in the Library of Congress, edited by Harry Katz, the former head curator of the Library’s Prints and Photographs division, which includes original cartoon artwork. The Abrams book has a format similar to that of Yale University Press’s Masters of American Comics catalogue; there is a long essay about the history of comics, in this case by Katz, followed by an array of essays, mostly about individual artists, by an extraordinary lineup of contributors. Whereas the Masters book was a catalogue of the show of the same name, the Cartoon America book does not limit itself to examples of the Wood collection on display, but deals with the Library’s entire range of holdings in original cartoon and comics art.

The book jacket for Cartoon America features a knockout illustration by Richard Williams (not the animator of the same name), showing Mount Rushmore redone with the faces of Charlie Brown, Ignatz, Bill Griffith’s Zippy the Pinhead, and Popeye; the original art is included in the exhibition. It’s a gag kidding the elevation of American comics and cartoons into the realm of serious art, but that elevation is real. The introductory wall text for the exhibit, by its co-curators Sara W. Duke and Martha H. Kennedy, reprinted in its brochure, declares that “The Art Wood Collection of Cartoon and Caricature. . .is a jewel among the Library’s special collections. . . .”

But, enjoyable as Williams’ redesign of Mount Rushmore is, do Charlie Brown, Ignatz, Zippy and Popeye really convey the full range of American “comic art”? Something seems missing.

In the foreword to the Cartoon America book, James H. Billington, the Librarian of Congress himself, writes that “Few people realize that the “Library of Congress is home to one of the world’s great collections of original cartoon art.” He explains that “The library began to collect and preserve cartoons and caricatures within decades of its founding in 1800, recognizing their value as vehicles of social and political commentary and as original works of art” (p. 7). This is highly prescient and admirable, although Billington’s description suggests that the Library’s primary interest was in editorial cartooning.

James Arthur “Art” Wood, Jr. is a longtime editorial cartoonist who was also a major collector of cartoon art, compiling what Billington calls “the most comprehensive private collection of original historical American cartoon art known to exist” (p. 7). In 1995 Wood opened the National Gallery of Caricature and Cartoon Art in Washington, D. C. to exhibit his collection to the public; however, due to lack of funding, it closed merely two years later. (Maybe one of the gallery’s problems was publicity: I had heard about it but was never able to find out where it was.) So, instead, Wood donated his collection to the Library of Congress in 2000, which, according to Katz, “more than doubled the Library’s already outstanding cartoon art holdings. . . “ (p. 13). Billington states that the Library has also recently acquired other “notable collections” in cartoon art besides Wood’s.

“Cartoon America” is very different from the “Masters of American Comics” exhibition. “Masters” is, as Times critic Holland Cotter put it, a “masterpiece show” (Fri., Nov. 24), dealing solely with fifteen artists whom it presents as the most accomplished practitioners of the medium; the selection of works, the wall texts and, even more so, the catalogue make strong analytic arguments for the visual greatness of the Masters’ works. Though virtually all the works in the “Cartoon America” show merit exhibition, they are not all on such a high level of achievement. For example, the section about comic strips includes an example of Cathy Guisewite’s Cathy, which would be no one’s choice as a miracle of graphic mastery and beauty; its virtues lie elsewhere, in its wit and perceptiveness. (Now here’s a prime example of McCloud’s Iconoclast school.) The curators included an example of Bil Keane’s The Family Circus, which is infamously banal as both writing and art; I could only justify that on historical and sentimental grounds.

Whereas “Masters” narrowed its focus to little more than a dozen cartoonists, “Cartoon America” seems to aim for a more encyclopedic approach to American cartoon art. Billington writes of Wood, “Over time he compiled an extraordinary collection encompassing virtually every aspect of the genre and every era of our nation’s history” (p. 7). (By “genre” Billington means presumably means “medium,” though his choice of words may be revealing.) In the brochure Duke and Kennedy write that the 102 original artworks in their show reveal “the vitality of an innovative and evolving art form that includes political illustrations, gag cartoons, comic strips, illustrations, animation, and caricature.” Something big still seems to be missing from this encyclopedic survey, though, as we shall see.

Not having been to Washington D. C. since the last century (i. e., 1999), I was looking out for changes, but found few. Well, there was that colossal new building across the Mall from the East Building of the National Gallery of Art; that turned out to be the new National Museum of the American Indian. Just as surprising were the new traffic lights. When the “walk” signal goes on, a lower screen displays numbers that steadily count down towards zero; then the flashing red signal turns on, and another countdown begins, indicating how many seconds are left till the light turns solidly red and the traffic recommences. This had the effect of making crossing the street seem like an episode of 24: if I didn’t make it across in time, would the street blow up? And the countdowns, in turn, reminded me that this was my first visit to Washington D. C. after the 9/11 attacks. Another reminder was the long, slow security line at the public entrance to the Library of Congress’s Thomas Jefferson Building, complete with metal detector and X-ray machine. So, once I got through security, should I fasten my seat belt and wait for the Jefferson Building to take off? Do they still serve beverages?

The Jefferson Building is actually a monumental and magnificent Beaux-Arts edifice, whose Great Hall is an astonishing, almost overwhelmingly elaborate visual extravaganza of grand staircases, sculpture, murals of mythological and allegorical figures, and inscriptions about the value of wisdom. The “Cartoon America” show has been given a place of honor, along two opposite sides of the Great Hall.

I started with the “Animation” section, which not only displays artwork from classic animated films, but also features a video monitor showing corresponding sequences from the actual films.

Here was a drawing of Winsor McCay’s Gertie the Dinosaur backing away in surprise from a woolly mammoth; Gertie was the first great example of character animation that conveyed personality. This drawing was actually a tracing, made circa 1980, of McCay’s 1914 original.

Here too was a model sheet for Max and Dave Fleischer’s Betty Boop (see “Comics in Context” #116 and 117), labeled as being from 1932-1934. This looked to me like Betty after the movie industry’s Production Code started being enforced in 1934: her dress, with its high neckline, looked considerably more proper and her trademark garters were gone. Nevertheless, she was still in a minidress: in terms of fashion she was thirty years ahead of her time. Oddly, the video monitor showed the scantily clad pre-code Betty from Boop Oop a Doop (1932), fending off the advances of an obese circus ringmaster.

A highlight of this section was a “preparatory drawing” from the Fleischers’ Popeye cartoon Females Is Fickle (1940), showing Popeye, like a more combative Jonah, trapped inside a gigantic, semi-transparent jellyfish and punching his way out: this single drawing captured the dynamism of the full animated sequence, shown on the video monitor.

Here too were cels and watercolors for Disney’s Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937) (pgs. 15, 25), The Sorcerer’s Apprentice from Fantasia (1940) (p. 194), and Dumbo (1940). The most impressive Disney piece was a remarkable pastel for Bambi (1942) done by Tyrus Wong as a concept sketch, showing Bambi’s father, the godlike stag known as the Great Prince, standing between barren trees, atop a rocky crag (p. 191). The trees are in silhouette, the sky is gray, and the enormous rock is cast into deep shadow, but the godlike stag is lit by an aura of light, and seems almost to blend into it, and to glow.

The only other animation studio represented is MGM’s, through 1940 model sheets for William Hanna and Joseph Barbera’s Tom and Jerry (p. 197). But what about Tex Avery’s great MGM animated shorts, and, for that matter, Warner Brothers’ Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies? Mickey Mouse is in this show, but not Bugs Bunny; Hanna and Barbera made it in, but not Chuck Jones. And what about UPA and the whole history of American animation since the 1940s? (If you want to pick up where “Cartoon America” leaves off, go to New York City to see “Saturday Morning,” the Museum of Comic and Cartoon Art’s comprehensive current exhibit on television animation.) Wood’s tastes in animation seem to have frozen in 1942, so the Library has a great deal of work to do to catch up in collecting animation art. But no, this isn’t what I mean when I say that something big is missing from the “Cartoon America” show.

Next came the section designated “Gag & Single Panel Cartoons,” and the examples on display ranged considerably in quality. Particularly interesting was a cartoon by Peter Arno (1904-1968), a “close variant” of which appeared in the September 19, 1936 issue of The New Yorker. It shows a group of apparently prosperous people, one of whom, according to the caption, is saying, “Let’s go to the Trans-Lux and hiss Roosevelt.” So these would be wealthy conservatives, probably Republicans, of the time, who were opposed to Franklin Delano Roosevelt’s New Deal programs to aid the masses who were impoverished by the great Depression. They’re heading to the Trans-Lux, a movie theater in Manhattan, to hiss at FDR when he appears onscreen in a newsreel. I suppose the contemporary equivalent would be cheering Rush Limbaugh or Bill O’Reilly on as they lash into liberals on talk radio or Fox News. The people in this cartoon are obsessed: they’re going to the movies, not to watch the feature film, but to sneer at FDR, who isn’t actually even there. Moreover, weirdly, Arno has placed these middle-aged and elderly characters in costumes, as if they’re going to a masquerade; what’s especially noticeable is that their legs are in tights, which is not particularly age-appropriate. Is the cartoon’s point that these reactionaries are letting go of their inhibitions, both about exposing their physiques and expressing their hatred for FDR? Or that they’re playing at politics like overage children playing dress-up? Is the cartoon even hinting that there’s something decadent about indulging in this petty political meanness?

Perhaps the ultimate extreme in what Scott McCloud calls the Iconoclast “tribe” of cartoonists is represented by the cartoons of the legendary New Yorker prose humorist James Thurber. In the Cartoon America book another celebrated New Yorker contributor, novelist John Updike, writes an amusing essay titled “Technically Challenged Carefree Ineptitude: James Thurber.” Updike points out that a childhood accident cost Thurber one of his eyes and damaged the other, causing his vision to continue to deteriorate in his adult life. Hence, Updike asserts, Thurber’s “development as a picture maker was arrested at a lively primitivism” (p. 216). Thurber’s limited sight provides a reasonable excuse, although I suppose he may simply have had limited talent as a draftsman regardless of the condition of his eyes. Updike further contends that “some of his best-known cartoons. . .were the product of a carefree ineptitude” (p. 216). He reports that Thurber himself confessed that when he tried to draw a seal astride a rock, the drawing came out looking like a seal inexplicably peering over the headboard of a bed, which proved to be one of his most memorable images (reproduced on pgs. 217 and 221). In other words, Thurber, through his lack of graphic skill, created happy accidents, and his far superior writing ability transformed these graphic lemons into lemonade.

Even so, Thurber’s ability to visually delineate the emotions of his characters can be no accident. In both the show and the book (p. 220), there is a cartoon, circa 1934, that Thurber drew on lined paper, like that of a schoolboy’s note pad. A bald man, his eyebrows furrowed angrily, his upper teeth bared, stretched menacingly over a nude woman, lying prone in the traditional position of an odalisque in art. The man’s left arm curves, as if it has no elbows, and ends in two visible fingers: it resembles not a human arm, but a serpent with mouth agape. His right arm and hand look more like a wing as if he were a bird of prey hovering over his victim. Nonetheless, Thurber’s childlike drawing style, and the man’s baldness, somehow deprive him of a sense of the menace: it’s something like Elmer Fudd posing as Don Juan. As for the odalisque, her face is rather plain, and she seems not frightened by the stalker but casual and nonchalant. “Oh, Mr. Benholding,” she says, “I never saw that look in your eyes before,” a romantic cliché made laughable by the absurdity of the picture. Updike contends that Thurber’s cartoons “were libidinous to an extent that pushed The New Yorker‘s youthful prudery to its limit” (p. 216). This cartoon is indeed about sex, but the joke lies in the contrast between the intense passion being evoked and the comical, sexless ordinariness of the potential lovers.

Though Updike refers to Thurber’s “technically challenged style,” he also points out that Thurber was able to use his graphic limitations to genuinely artistic ends: “His more crudely amateurish successors in minimalism demonstrate by contrast how dynamic and expressive, how oddly tender, Thurber’s art was” (p. 220). If Thurber is indeed an Iconoclast cartoonist, he’s an Iconoclast whose style I like, and this, along with Thurber’s comedic vision, is why. Remember that the “Masters” show called Charles Schulz a “minimalist.” Looking at Thurber’s simple figures and the strong, effective facial expressions and body language he gives them, it’s easy to see a connection between Thurber’s cartooning and Schulz’s.

Next I arrived at the “Comic Strips” section of “Cartoon America,” where several of the Masters reappeared. My favorite piece in the entire exhibition is E. C. Segar’s Sunday, May 12, 1935 page of Thimble Theatre Starring Popeye (which, alas, was not reprinted in the Cartoon America book). Popeye only has a cameo role in this Sunday page, whose strengths are actually more verbal than visual. This Sunday page’s central figure is instead trickster and hamburger obsessive J. Wellington Wimpy. The Popeye animated cartoons, which play down the importance of dialogue, have never done justice to Wimpy; this Sunday page demonstrates what makes him a great character in his own right.

At the outset Olive remarks to Popeye that “I’ll bet you Wimpy has desert madness–probably raving around saying poetry.” Indeed he is, addressing a desert flower sprouting from a cow’s skull out of a Georgia O’Keeffe painting. Maybe the proper comparison is to Hamlet with Yorick’s skull, for this Sunday page primarily consists of Wimpy’s rhyming soliloquy on his own mortality. “Oh, flower of death. . .so frail, so red/Growing from a thing so dead/Even as I will be quite soon/Merely bones “˜neath sun and moon.” Wimpy’s flowery doggerel is amusing, but he is nonetheless talking about a serious matter that one does not expect to find in a comedy strip like Popeye’s. And Wimpy goes on: “Ah, well/’Tis not for me to break the spell/ That links all things in a mighty plan/That cannot be changed by laws of man.” Now he’s talking not only about the inevitability of death, but about man’s helplessness against fate, and the “mighty plan,” presumably conceived by God, that governs the universe! Yet not even these cosmic concerns can ultimately overrule the dominant passion of Wimpy’s life. He tells the flower that “we both crave meat”; the skull out of which it grows is from the animal that is the source of hamburger meat. The subject of Wimpy’s soliloquy shifts from man’s role in the universe to the hamburger’s role in his diet, and reaching the climax, he finally collapses out of what seems a combination of his frustrated carnivorous passions and his own longwindedness. This is one great strip.

There was also a brilliant Peanuts Sunday from January 20, 1963 (p. 213). It too takes the form of a soliloquy, but in this case Charles Schulz devises a facial expression for Charlie Brown that reflects each psychological turn he takes in this extended monologue. After the introductory top tier of panels, the strip begins like a musical composition, sounding the theme: “Oh, how I hate these lunch hours!” says Charlie Brown, sitting alone, looking unhappily into his lunch bag. Shunned by the other kids, lunch hours just remind him of how much he is disliked; “During class it doesn’t matter,” he will tell us, presumably because then he is surrounded by other kids and can pretend he’s part of the community. He seems trapped in an endless cycle of unchanging, dreary lunch hours. Even the lunch in the bag offers no surprises that would break the monotony: “Peanut butter again.” Charlie Brown fantasizes about his unattainable ideal, the nameless little red-haired girl he loves from afar, and a moony expression comes over his face. But it abruptly vanished, as Charlie Brown’s own insecurities overwhelm him. He finally succumbs to despair: “Rats! Nobody is ever going to like me.” And he finally walks off, his lunch uneaten, as the composition closes by repeating the initial theme: “Lunch hour is the loneliest hour of the day.” The cartooniness of Schulz’s art style and the small, mundane scale of some of Charlie Brown’s concerns (e. g., peanut butter for lunch) render the sequence humorous, but as my recounting minus pictures should show, this soliloquy is simultaneously quite sad. It’s this balance between the humorous and the heart-rending that characterizes Schulz’s work at its best, as it is here.

In his essay on Schulz in the Cartoon America book, comics historian Robert C. Harvey makes a point about another balance that Schulz created in Peanuts, which I had noted in a previous column (see “Comics in Context” #66): the opposition between Charlie Brown’s melancholy and Snoopy’s joie de vivre. Harvey puts it particularly well: “against this. . .assessment of the human condition, Schulz balanced the fantasy life of Snoopy, a blithe beagle whose seeming brilliant success at every endeavor reassures us that life is not only about disappointment and endurance. It is also about dreams and the sustaining power of the imagination” (p. 214) Does Charlie Brown represent Schulz as the everyman who endures the mundane sufferings of everyday life, while Snoopy represents Schulz as artist, who finds joy in his own imaginative creations?

There’s a good example of Winsor McCay’s Dream of the Rarebit Fiend from 1906 in the show, but again, unfortunately, not in the book. A cranky man seated at the end of a trolley informs us that “I always like to sit in the corner of a car; then I don’t have people tramping all over me.” But as one passenger after another enters and sits down, the curmudgeon finds himself wedged into a corner. Then the trolley somehow turns ninety degrees, and the crank finds himself at the bottom of the trolley, being crushed by the weight of the other commuters, whereupon he wakes from his rarebit-induced nightmare.

The “Cartoon America” McCay work that I most liked, however, is not in the Library of Congress show but in the book. Co-curator Martha Kennedy wrote a brief essay for the Abrams book called “Winsor McCay’s Political Cartoons.” There is a long tradition in editorial cartoons of using symbolic figures, like the Democratic donkey and the Republican elephant which Thomas Nast popularized. McCay went much further with this, creating what Kennedy calls “allegories or parables set in otherworldly, fantastical settings” (p. 148). In my view McCay elevates political and social situations of his time to the level of myth.

For example, in the first cartoon accompanying her essay, from the 1920s, a man labeled as “Mental and Moral Courage,” who appears to be a giant, looks into the stormy heavens at lightning bolts labeled as “War,” “Depression,” “Calamity,” and “Discouragement” (p. 149). Notice that these menaces include not only external perils (“War”) but also threats to psychological well-being (“Discouragement”). Below this picture is a remarkable tier of five small panels, each showing living creatures violently battling one another: first two scorpions, then two sloths, then two roosters, next two dogs, and finally two human boxers. Kennedy interprets this series as “emphasizing man’s ability to overcome physical, animal passions.” I disagree: I interpret the sequence as contending that humanity is prey to the same aggressive behavior as these vicious lower animals. I suspect McCay means to contrast the battling boxers with his giant of “Mental and Moral Courage,” who he shows quietly observing the lightning bolts, presumably deciding on the best course of action to take, rather than simply charging in with unthinking violence.

The next cartoon, “Wheels of Industry,” also from the 1920s (p. 150), shows four giants, who dwarf Uncle Sam, the embodiment of America; these titans wear short skirt-like costumes and sandals, making them look like figures out of ancient Greece or Rome. These giants are labeled “Steel,” “Electric Power,” “Ford,” and “General Motors,” and they are pulling some sort of enormous mechanism with a huge wheel labeled “Industry.” Thus the great economic power of early twentieth century America takes on mythic proportions.

So does its crime. In the architectural fantasy of “City Crime Skyline,” circa 1930 (p. 150), a skyline of skyscrapers includes a brobdingnagian bottle marked “Bootleg Whiskey,” a colossal gun, labeled “Crime,” and a tower that might also be an immense syringe, marked “Dope.”

In the last cartoon, “Fame, Fortune, Wealth” (p. 151), circa 1928 (significantly, just before the great stock market crash), a veritable ocean of people surrounds a dinosaur-sized pig, who is draped with jewelry, and labeled “Fortune Wealth.” Kennedy correctly observes that “the pig alludes to the sin of gluttony and biblical admonitions against the worship of idols and false gods.” The gargantuan hog reminds me of the gigantic beasts of sword-and-sorcery tales. It’s also like Richard Wagner’s dragon Fafnir and other such creatures that obsessively guard treasures, literal monsters embodying greed. But McCay pointedly makes his beast no awe-inspiring dragon, a fit adversary for heroes. Instead McCay casts the monster of greed as a repulsive swine, rendering the people who swarm around it pathetic and deluded. The true heroes are the relatively few in the background who are scaling a difficult, rocky incline to reach a Parthenon-like edifice marked “Fame,” by which McCay surely means the reward for honorable achievement, and not mere celebrity.

I will continue my report on “Cartoon America” in a few weeks; next week is my annual Christmas column, followed by the annual holiday break. As for the mystery of what’s missing from the “Cartoon America” exhibit, if it’s not already obvious, here’s a clue. I recommend you read fellow Quick Stop columnist Fred Hembeck’s November 24, 2006 tribute to the recently deceased pioneering comic book historian Dr. Jerry Bails over at his blog. As Fred said, “Every single one of us who, over the last forty odd years, made the effort to sit down and write something serious (or even not-so-serious) about the once neglected funny book genre–whether in a crudely printed fanzine, a mass produced coffee table volume, or simply on our very own blogs–owes a deep debt of thanks to Dr. Jerry Bails.”
ADVERTISEMENTS FOR MYSELF
Now on sale in your local comics stores is the first issue of The Official Handbook of the Invincible Universe, an encyclopedia of the characters in Robert Kirkman’s superhero series Invincible, done in the style of the original Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe. Since I was one of the principal writers of the Marvel Handbook, I was invited to contribute to the Invincible Handbook: the biographies of the various Guardians of the Globe are mine. An impressive lineup of artists was recruited to do the illustrations. It was a fun project to do, and I suspect it’ll be a fun book to read, even if you’ve never seen Invincible before.

Copyright 2006 Peter Sanderson

QSE News: 12/8/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:56 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgExecutives at Nintendo are cautioning gamers about swinging their new, Wii wireless controllers as reports of extensive damage to personal property are popping up on the web.  When asked for comment, one executive stated, “We GROSSLY underestimated the over-developed wrists and forearms on these sexually repressed kids.  Seriously, they should think about stepping away from the game, getting out of the house and meeting ‘actual’ girls. Seriously.”
  • In international news, David Beckham and Victoria Beckham have created quite a stir in England over their apparent split with prancing super couple Elton John and David Furnish.  I’m sure that we here at QSE News speak for all of America when we say, “who the hell is David and Victoria Beckham?”
  • The nominations for this years Grammy’s have been announced, and leading the pack with eight nominations is R&B artist Mary J. Blige.  While most of the nominations were expected, the nomination of Clay Aiken for Best Female Performance was a complete surprise.
  • Stephen King and Peter Straub’s outstanding collaboration The Talisman is in the production pipeline for a TNT mini-series. The original book, released in 1984, is about a boy who can travel between dimensions.  Staying true to form, executives at TNT have promised to make some “minor” changes to the story – like making the main character an 18-year-old, blonde, big-breasted woman and changing the “travel between dimensions” plotline to “traveling to Oakland for cheerleader tryouts.”
  • And finally today, comedian Eddie Murphy is denying reports that he is the father of “Scary Spice” Melanie Brown’s unborn child.  Representatives for Murphy confirmed that the pair had dated in the past, but are no longer an item since Murphy found out that Brown is not a transvestite.
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That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 12/8/2006

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:49 am
thingamabobs.jpg

The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

————————————————

  • George Harrison performs “The Pirate Song”… (Thingamabob)

Have a THINGAMABOB? Send it in!

##

December 7, 2006

Music For The Masses: December 7th, 2006

Filed under: Columns,Music for the Masses — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:57 am
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Welcome, friends, to another edition of Music for the Masses! How the hell you doing? Me? Why I’m happier than Rosie O’Donnell shopping for flannel shirts right now because I ABSOLUTELY love this time of year. That’s right, now that Thanksgiving has been kicked to the curb like O.J.’s book and T.V. deals, it’s time for me to turn my Attention Deficit Disorder to Christmas, that magical time of year where Christians exchange gifts to celebrate the birth of Santa Clause… or something like that. You know? I probably should have paid more attention in church but seriously, do you have any idea how hard it was to stay awake through that after chugging half a bottle of communion wine? It was all “Blah blah blah”… but I digress. In fact, friends, this year is better than most, because unlike Christmas’s past, I can actually sit back, relax and enjoy the season because my gift-shopping is complete. I shit you not. And do you know who I have to thank for this little miracle? Britney Spears.

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In the uncensored pic, it looks like she’s holding a Cornish Rex Cat in her lap.

You see, usually, I’m beating my… umm, head against the wall in a vain attempt to jar loose “present ideas” for all of the “hard-to-shop-for” people in my family. But after seeing that picture of Britney messing up the seat of Paris’ car, I had perfect gift ideas for everyone.

For instance, I took one look at that picture and realized my father, much like Brittany, prefers a “clean, close shave.” So… BAM!!!… dad’s gift is the new Norelco shaver.

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Another glance at the picture, between knuckle shuffles, and I think to myself “hmmm…  Aunt Selma could use some new, red drapes…

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After a half an hour of staring at the picture, it dawns on me that my grandma needs something to cover her vulv… I mean, Volvo… to protect it from the elements…

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Winters in Dubuque can be REALLY harsh. And just as I’m finishing, I think “Oh yeah, Uncle Nancy needs some new mud flaps for “˜his’ truck…”

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See what I mean? And you thought I was joking. So say what you want about my little trailer park princess, but the only thing I can say is “Thank you, Brittany!” The world is truly a better place with you in it. Of course, your kid, the one you dropped, probably disagrees, but what the hell does he know? He’s retarded now. The only thing he knows is not to let you pick him up because “mommy gave him a metal plate in his head” and that every time you hit “START” on the microwave, he shits himself and runs into the wall.

But enough about all of that, folks. It’s time now to check out some new music! This week, we check in with a Beatles re-mix and Double A digs deep to check the latest offering from Prince Po. Plus, my 10-year-old nephew Jacob checks in with a review of the new one from +44. Should be fun. So, what do you say? Let’s get to it, shall we??!!

m4m-love-dec6 Artist: The Beatles
Album: LOVE
Bastard Love Child of: George Martin and LSD
Best for: Realizing that these 40ish-year-old songs sound better than 98% of the shit being released today.
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As I’ve explained to you folks, previously, I love the Beatles… have ever since I was a wee-lad. In fact, while all my friends where out “getting fresh air” and playing the “sports,” I was holed up in my room listening to my dad’s original Beatles albums. Yes, I was a lonely child. Now, what I don’t love is Cirque De Soliel. Not because of the beautiful choreography, mind-boggling stunts and haunting music, but more so because I’m not a big fan of watching ambiguously gay French guys bench pressing each other. Call me “silly pants,” but that’s just the way I roll. I also eat hot dogs with a knife and fork, but I digress… again. So, when I heard that Cirque De Soliel’s new production was going to incorporate the music of the Beatles, I thought, “Wow… wonder what “stunt” they’ll perform for “˜Why Don’t We Do It In The Road?'” and then I didn’t give it another thought.

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That is, until this weekend, when I picked it up at the recommendation of a friend (Thanks, Ken!!) and after listening to the Audio DVD in 5.1 sound, mixed and mastered from the original, 4-track recordings, I gotta say… “HOLY SHIT!! This is an amazing disc!” First and foremost, it sounds fucking incredible. As I noted, that 5.1 mix will blow your mind and I will state, right now for the record (no pun intended), the Beatles have never sounded better on disc. George Martin’s formidable production abilities have never been more vividly on display and his work here with son, Giles, is mesmerizing. In keeping with the spirit of the Beatles, tracks have been reversed, sped up and slowed down, but all of it is original. I take that back… there is ONE “new” track… a string arrangement that George Martin composed to accompany an acoustic version of “While My Guitar Gentle Weeps.” Absolutely brilliant.

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Now, fans of the early work will argue that the song selection here is skewed in favor of the band’s more psychedelic material and that song’s like “Octopus’s Garden” and “Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite!” shouldn’t be focal points of the disc, but like Lance Bass playing butt darts with his boyfriend, you’re just “splitting hairs.” Sure, the tracks that get the most attention (read: that you hear the most of) are from later discs, but with all that is going on here in between and within the songs themselves LOVE actually does a hell of a job sampling the band’s entire career. If you are evenly REMOTELY a fan of this band, this is an absolute must-have and rest assured, you’ve never heard the Beatles quite like this. And oddly enough, after listening to this disc, I now have a new-found admiration for the work of Cirque de Soliel. So, if you’ll excuse me… I have to go put on a cod-piece and do some push-ups.

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Rating: 5 out of 5

M4M-DOUBLEA-TURK
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As I was walking through my local record store, looking for something to review this week, I was perplexed. There was absolutely nothing that I wanted to even listen to. I picked up the Best of Cee-Lo album, but put it down. I don’t mind Cee-Lo, but this album didn’t interest me. I saw The Game sitting on the shelf, and I had opted out of it last week, but it just doesn’t seem to be my speed. Eminem? Hell no. Not even if it were to save my grandmother from being beaten about the face and head by angry men wielding monkey wrenches. Wow, that was a little harsh, wasn’t it? But seriously, fuck Eminem. I’ve heard good things about the Bidman/Lil Wayne album, but again, it just didn’t interest me. But then, as I reached to put back the Birdman disc, I noticed something. It was Prince Po’s Prettyblack. Now to be fair, this album came out a little bit ago, but with the dredge of shit that has come out lately, anything would be better than the options that I was presented with. So I got it, and I’m pretty glad that I did.

Prettyblack is by no means the best rap album to come out this year, but it is light years beyond anything that has come out in recent weeks. The only thing that I’ve ever heard from Prince Po is the song “Copy Cats,” from quite possibly the best rap album ever, Danger Mouse and Jemini’s Ghetto Pop Life. Listening to Prettyblack, the vocal styling’s that made “Copy Cats” a great song on a great disc are all there. Unfortunately, the beats suffer a little. On almost every track, the beats are flat with little variation through the course of the song. I’m not saying that the beats are bad, they’re not, just a little stagnant. The rhymes do more than their part to bring the production up a notch.

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One thing that separates this album from a lot of other rappers work is this disc doesn’t feel the need to bring in big, flashy stars to flesh out a weak song. There are a few guest stars on this album, but not a single one that I’ve heard of. But even on the tracks with a guest, Po is front and center, doing his thing on his disc. The best song on the album is “Creep On It” with a nice little bump-iness that’ll get you moving, and Po’s clever lyrics flow with the beat like they are peanut butter and jelly. Or, for those of you who are morbidly obese and aren’t constantly thinking about food, the beat and raps go together like handcuffs and faux fur. Does that simile make sense? Maybe?

Like I said, this isn’t the best rap disc out there, but it is a hella good one. Before you go out and spend your hard earned money on some of the other crap that is clogging the shelves these days, pick this one up. Now, I’m going to go get me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich because I’ve got to keep up my girlish figure.

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Rating: 4 out of 5

REVIEWS BY. . .

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Jacob Montana Bell
Des Moines
, IA

m4m-12/6-44

My CD review is about a CD by the band that used to be Blink 182 but isn’t anymore because two guys from blink 182 made a new CD that I like a lot but not as much as “Ben 10″ on Cartoon Network. I like the songs on this CD and they are really good songs and they make me feel like jumping up and down and sometimes they make me want to hit my sister but my dad yells at me when I do that and I don’t like to get into trouble.

My dad says Blink 182 used to be good but then they got wussie and should be on that show “Will and Grace” but I don’t know any Blink 182 and I think that +44 is good no matter what my dad says. He says to go get him a beer and that everyone can think what they want and that is what makes America good and I think Macaroni and Cheese makes America good but my dad says that doesn’t make sense which makes my heart sad.

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The best song on the album is the one with the guitars and the drums and goes “when your heart stops beating” or something like that because sometimes it’s hard to hear. My mom told me not to listen to the music too loud because I might mess up my ears but when she leaves dad lets me turn it up as loud as it will go and sit right in front of the speakers. He says that is called rocking out and he tells his friends sometimes that he likes to rock out with his cock out and he doesn’t think that I hear that but I do and one time when I said it my mom made me eat some soap. There are some slow songs on this CD that are really good but not as much fun to rock out to but I don’t care because the singer does good singing and my second favorite song on the CD is “Baby Come on” and I also like “Make You Smile” and “Little Death.” The song “115” and “Lillian” are not very good but “Weatherman” and “Chapter 13″ are good and I don’t remember the names of the other songs but I like them and they are good sometimes.

This CD is good and I would tell all my friends in Mrs. Johnson’s third grade class to make their parents get it for them.

UPCOMING RELEASES:

As a public service to you fine folks out there, I’ll be posting the upcoming CD releases going forward. Be careful though, friends, there are a lot of turds in the toilet, if you know what I mean. . .

Dec. 12 AGRESSOR DEATHREAT
Dec. 12 ALBERTI, ALEJANDRA ALEJANDRA ALBERTI
Dec. 12 ANTAEUS BLOOD LIBEL
Dec. 12 AUFGEHOBEN MESSIDOR
Dec. 12 BENNETT, TONY AN AMERICAN CLASSIC
Dec. 12 BIG TUCK THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH
Dec. 12 BUDDHA-BAR BUDDHA-BAR TEN YEARS
Dec. 12 BUSHWICK BILL LITTLE BIG MAN
Dec. 12 CAURAL MIRRORS FOR EYES (2XLP)
Dec. 12 CONTRIVA SEPERATE CHAMBERS
Dec. 12 CURRENT 93/OM INERRANT RAYS OF INFALLIBLE SU
Dec. 12 DAHL, IAN VAN JUST A GIRL
Dec. 12 DIAMOND, NEIL 12 SONGS
Dec. 12 DREY, JENNA BY THE WAY
Dec. 12 EMINEM EMINEM PRESENTS: THE RE-UP
Dec. 12 ENTRANCE PRAYER OF DEATH
Dec. 12 FANTASIA FANTASIA
Dec. 12 GHOSTFACE KILLAH MORE FISH
Dec. 12 GIDDY MOTORS DO EASY
Dec. 12 GORELORD NORWEGIAN CHAINSAW MASSACRE
Dec. 12 GORGOROTH ANTICHRIST
Dec. 12 GORGOROTH INCIPIT SATAN
Dec. 12 GORGOROTH PENTAGRAM
Dec. 12 GORGOROTH TWILIGHT OF THE IDOLS
Dec. 12 GORGOROTH UNDER THE SIGN OF HELL
Dec. 12 GORGOROTH DESTROYER
Dec. 12 HICKS, TAYLOR TAYLOR HICKS
Dec. 12 JAY-Z KINGDOM COME
Dec. 12 JIMMY LEVINE SHARE MY LOVE
Dec. 12 KARMA LATENIGHT DAYDREAMING
Dec. 12 KNIGHT, FERN MUSIC FOR WITCHES AND ALCHEMISTS
Dec. 12 K-THE-I??? BROKEN LOVE LETTER
Dec. 12 LOVELY FEATHERS MY BEST FRIEND DANIEL
Dec. 12 MARY J. BLIGE REFLECTIONS – A RETROSPECTIVE
Dec. 12 MIRRORS 13 PATIENT FLOWERS
Dec. 12 MONGIL, MANOLO VIVO
Dec. 12 NECROPHAGIA SLIT WRISTS AND CASKET ROT
Dec. 12 NECROPHAGIA SEASON OF THE DEAD
Dec. 12 NOVY, TOM IBIZA SESSIONS VOL.2 (2XCD)
Dec. 12 ORIGINAL HAMSTER TRENDSETTER AND THE FOLLOWERS
Dec. 12 OST REST STOP DEAD AHEAD
Dec. 12 REINA ON MY OWN
Dec. 12 SONIC YOUTH The Destroyed Room: B Sides and Singles
Dec. 12 TAHA, RACHID DIWAN 2
Dec. 12 TYRESE ALTER EGO
Dec. 12 YOUNG JEEZY THE INSPIRATION
Dec. 12 VA MARY ANNE HOBBS WARRIOR DUBZ
Dec. 12 VA CHARLOTTE’S WEB
Dec. 12 VA BRAZILIAN BEATS BROOKLYN (2XLP)
Dec. 12 VARIOUS BEST OF DA BAY
Dec. 12 VARIOUS ERAGON: MUSIC FROM THE MOTION PICTURE
Dec. 12 VARIOUS THE COVENANT
Dec. 19 AGUILERA, CHRISTINA HURT
Dec. 19 ALARM CLOCKS THE TIME HAS COME
Dec. 19 BLACK JAK PLACE YOUR BETS
Dec. 19 BOW WOW THE PRICE OF FAME
Dec. 19 BROOKLYN LOBSTER BROOKLYN LOBSTER
Dec. 19 DJ Clue THE PROFFESSIONAL III
Dec. 19 DO OR DIE HEADZ OR TAILZ
Dec. 19 GOJOGO ALL IS FAIR
Dec. 19 GRAND HUSTLE PRESENTS IN DA STREETZ, VOL. 4
Dec. 19 HARRY PERRY BAND VIDEO COMMANDER
Dec. 19 JERRY LEE LEWIS ROCKIN’ WITH THE KILLER
Dec. 19 NAS HIP HOP IS DEAD
Dec. 19 PACK , THE SKATEBOARDS 2 SCRAPERS (CD ENHANCED)
Dec. 19 RBD REBELS
Dec. 19 SLAYER CHRIST ILLUSION
Dec. 19 STYLES P TIME IS MONEY
Dec. 19 SUGARCUBES THE COMPLETE STUDIO ALBUMS
Dec. 19 TRICK DADDY BACK BY THUG DEMAND
Dec. 19 Soundtrack Blood Diamond (James Newton Howard)
Dec. 19 Soundtrack Night At The Museum (Alan Silvestri)
Dec. 19 Soundtrack We Are Marshall (Christophe Beck)
Dec. 19 Various Artists Juke Joint Soul!
Dec. 19 Various Artists The Flow Volume 2
Dec. 19 Various Artists Variety
Dec. 19 Various Artists Variety Volume 2
Dec. 19 Various Artists Massive Dub (2 CD)
Dec. 19 Various Artists The Ultimate 50’s Collection
Dec. 19 Various Artists Chicano Riders At The Park [Enhanced CD]

Well, folks, that’s going to do it for me and the gang this week, so… until next time… keep wearing it proud and playing it loud.

Send your homo-erotic work out regimen, review copies, presents and assorted hate mail to:


M.C. Bell
P.O. Box 1222
Arvada, CO 80001

E-MAIL THE AUTHOR

QSE News: 12/7/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:48 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgOnly days after liquor stocks crashed at the news of Lindsay Lohan’s planned “sobriety,” the hard-partying actress went into a boozed-up tirade at an exclusive dinner for GQ magazine.  “Thank the [EXPLETIVE DELETED] lord,” said an un-named Smirnoff executive, “I thought we were going to have to lay some people off.”
  • Following in the footsteps of fellow “comedian” Michael Richards, Andy Dick is the latest “celebrity” to slip and utter a racial slur in front of an audience.  Dick jumped onstage at a Los Angeles Improv and joked about the Richards incident, saying to the crowd “you’re all a bunch of N****.” This incident marks the pinnacle of Dick’s quest to prove to the world that he is the least funny person in America.
  • Don Cheadle is set to star in and direct a film centering around the life of famous trumpeter Miles Davis.  To prepare for the role, Cheadle has been shadowing other famous “horn blowers” Wynton Marsalis and Clay Aiken.
  • Robert Smith of The Cure has writer’s block, preventing him and the rest of his band from completing their next album. Smith told reporters that he is having a hard time trying to come up with new ways to depress himself.
  • It appears that Jennifer Anniston and Vince Vaughn have, apparently, “broken up” for good.  When asked for comment, Anniston’s publicist said, “Yeah, well, Jen wanted to be free to pursue another publicity-fueling, faux-relationship with a hot, Hollywood actor to bolster the expected weak ticket sales for her next movie, Friends-less, which hits theaters next spring.”
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That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 12/7/2006

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:43 am
thingamabobs.jpg

The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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  • Okay, so, when a flying snowman wants some of your soda, you share… (Thingamabob)
  • Whatever you do, stay away from Pine Oaks… (Thingamabob)

Have a THINGAMABOB? Send it in!

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December 6, 2006

Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review and giveaway, Miami Vice

Filed under: Columns,Nocturnal Admissions — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:46 am
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Vice title

Regular readers of this diary may recall that the last time I reviewed Miami Vice I saw it on the big screen, in the theater, just me and 400 passholes, of which one, a violent cockeyed retard, created a scene.

Yet I still managed to like the movie.

It wasn’t because I was a fan of the show. The movie proves to have little to do with the source show. Instead it is a fantasia on themes originally enunciated in Miami Vice.

Nor was it just because I am a huge Michael Mann buff, though the film is all of a piece with what he has been doing in films as diverse as Heat, Collateral, and even Ali and The Insider, with a similar catalog of moral questions and stylistic choices.

No, it was the sheer physical near-silent beauty of the thing, with its actors like sleek panthers, all movement and style. I love the opening shots of the film, which showed Crockett and Tubbs (Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx) standing off to the edge in a disco watching the crowd. Now, thanks to the DVD which hits the street on Tuesday, December 5, 2006 for $29.95 (available in either a widescreen edition of the release version and in a unrated director’s cut), I have the movie again to enjoy, ponder over, and revel in.

Have you ever seen a wolf in the wild? I did once, while driving along the coast road in my home state with a friend. It had just come up over the edge and was looking sharply at the traffic, seeing if there was a way across the two lanes. I only saw the animal for a second as our car sped by, but I still haven’t forgotten how alert it was. It’s whole affect was there, here, alive, looking, sensing, seemingly every hair buzzed with the reality of what was going on around him, above, behind, in front. It was the sharpest thing I saw on the road.

Like foxes

That’s what Crockett and Tubbs reminded me of at the start of Miami Vice. Now, most viewers complained that because the movie starts in media res like this, they didn’t know what was going on, and remained lost for the rest of the movie. And if you take a glance at the screenplay (not included on the DVD) you can see how much of the dialogue Mann threw out (was that one of the reasons Foxx was reportedly unhappy on the set? Or was he worrying about his performance in Dreamgirls, in which he is reportedly uncomfortable looking?). Mann has a way of shooting people in the middle of action that looks really realistic, and he is fond of a shot that contributes to that feeling, which is one that Tarantino uses at least once per movie too, a close tracking shot behind someone walking somewhere, but in which you can also see the whole field of battle he is walking onto. The film is shot by Dion Beebe, who also worked on Collateral, and it has some stupendous shots in it, which look great on the Universal DVD.

Dion

As I said, it is less an episode of Miami Vice, than Mann’s “Answer to Heat.” As I wrote about the original release, “This is the second time that Mann has gone to the well of TV work to fashion a movie. Heat is a masterly re-filming of his TV movie, the 1989 Crimewave (AKA L.A. Takedown). In essence, what Mann has done here is re-write the end of Heat. In that film, crook De Niro and cop Pacino have a face off on a busy airport runway in a sequence that left a lot of people unsatisfied. Here, in a similar situation, a character makes a wholly different decision, and it is indeed much more satisfying. Thus, both because of their roots and because of their contrasting resolutions, Heat and Miami Vice are paired films in Mann’s filmography. Mann tries to balance to entirely different moods, absolute quotidian realism on the one hand, and romanticism on the other. This time he may have got the ending right.”

There are about six new minutes in the unrated version, bringing the film up to 140 Minutes, most of which appear to be in the very beginning, in a sequent which also explains why the task force is in the disco. As far as I can tell, though, the film still doesn’t explain who the criminal mole is in the complex of agencies trying to catch the film’s big drug dealer. The answer may be in there; I just haven’t found it yet.

Mann

The widescreen anamorphic transfer (2.40:1) is excellent, and the audio comes in English, Spanish, French Dolby Digital 5.1. Supplements consist of a host of making ofs, including “Miami Vice Undercover,” “Miami & Beyond: Shooting on Location,” “Visualizing Miami Vice,” some so-called behind the scenes featurettes (“Gun Training,” “Haitian Hotel Camera BLocking,” and “Mojo Race”, with the biggest supplement being a commentary track from Mann. Mann’s been doing these a lot lately, and he comes prepared, remembers a lot, and likes to tell stories. As far as I can tell, though, he doesn’t go into any detail about Foxx’s supposed dissatisfaction on the set.

If you’ve got this far, let it be known that if you are the first person to email me at dkholmcontests@mac.com, you get a free DVD of the uncut Miami Vice, care of Universal Home Video [10:18 PM PST: We have a winner]. Obviously I can’t reply to everyone, so if you don’t hear from me within a few hours, odds are that you’re not the first.

QSE News: 12/6/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:44 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgJust a few months after coming out to the world, ‘N Sync singer Lance Bass and his boyfriend Reichen Lehmkuhl have broken up. Sources close to the couple report that the reason behind the split is that Lehmkuhl was simply “sick of taking it up the Bass.”
  • The rock group Staind is taking a break from each other with no plans on reconvening. Staind lead singer Aaron Lewis said that the group will use the hiatus to learn a different style of music since no one buys (or likes) nu-metal anymore.
  • NBC has picked up a full season of the show 30 Rock, despite the fact that it has only seen a luke-warm response from viewers. To help bump up the ratings, the characters played by Tina Fey and Tracy Morgan will have an illicit affair while Alec Baldwin’s character hunts them down in a 24 hour time frame.
  • Following the recent adventures of other celebrities and alcohol, actor Rip Torn was arrested outside of New York City for DUI.  Torn is best known for his roles in such films as Men In Black and Dodgeball, and for constantly being confused with effeminate, confetti throwing comedian Rip Taylor.
  • In some sad Hollywood news, Max, the beloved pet pig of George Clooney, has passed away at the ripe old age of 19.  Sources close to Clooney reported that the actor is “devastated” and was in tears as he dug the roasting pit for his Hawaiian Luau-themed memorial this weekend.
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That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 12/6/2006

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:23 am
thingamabobs.jpg

The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

————————————————

  • The Sound of Young America‘s Jesse Thorn has a new podcast. It is very funny, but currently untitled. I suggest he call it “The Life & Times of Horace Weisenblatt.” I also suggest you go listen to the funny. (Thingamabob)
  • An aircraft carrier landing, from the pilot’s viewpoint (Thingamabob)
  • After you see it, you’ll want to try the pepper water trick for yourself… (Thingamabob)

Have a THINGAMABOB? Send it in!

##

December 5, 2006

Party Favors: Where The Sun Don’t Dance

Filed under: Columns,Joe Corey's Party Favors — UncaScroogeMcD @ 4:28 am
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SALT LAKE CITY – Screw Sundance!!!!

After being told that Moving Midway was a sure pick for the upcoming festival, we got Michiganed! The rejection notice arrived on Monday. And the tears flowed from my eyes. It was sad that Godfrey Cheshire wouldn’t be able to complete his transformation from film reviewer to filmmaker by holding up the Grand Prize from Robert Redford.  This was his movie. He fought his hardest to keep this pure to his vision no matter what others told him. And now he has been told by Sundance – we don’t need to show that in our festival.

What is getting shown instead of the Cheshire family home moving movie? A documentary about a guy who died when he let a horse cornhole him. Yep. We lost out to a Kentucky Derby tribute to Oz.

This was going to be my year. I already had 2007 circled as the year I become the new Kevin Federline. I had already bought a pair of snow boots. But now it’s all off. Redford won’t return my calls. No elk hunting. No skiing. No back massages from Thora Birch. No calling him, Bob. I was going to be an indie superstar and now all January holds for me watching a guy get an award for the evils of horse sex. Who did this to me? There’s only one person I can blame: Godfrey Cheshire.

It was his movie. He told us that all the time. What happened to this man’s genius? Here’s a guy who has reviewed thousands of movies. How if given a chance to finally tell his cinematic story did he crap out to a horse screwing a man to death? Maybe he could enter it in a festival that has a “no animals banging humans” policy.

I look like the idiot praising Godfrey and his film. I’m sorry, global readers. I promise that next time I produce a film, it’s with someone who can deliver the goods. If I knew what the competition was like, I would have done a reshoot by rubbing Crisco on my butt and hooking up with the horse that played Sea Biscuit. Sure it would have looked out of place, but you’d remember it. Cause I’m driven for success!

BLOWIN’ UP WITH BOURDAIN

Have I not pointed out that the best “reality show” episode of the year was Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations when the chef found himself stuck in Beirut during the period the Israelis bombed the town. It was the Graham Greene experience as Bourdain and is crew sat by a hotel pool watching the missiles explode on buildings below.

When I first encountered Bourdain on the Food Channel. I watched three minutes, took a dislike to the guy and turned off the show. He struck me as an egotistical prick. But when I saw a promo for his Beirut adventure, I wanted to see what happens when a food show turns into a combat photography crew.

Bourdain’s journey which started out with joyful nightlife and ended with him being evacuated on a beach was amazing. The only thing it lacked to be a true Graham Greene experience is a failed torrid romance. After watching the show, I grabbed the library card and picked up Kitchen Confidential and A Cook’s Tour. Both books were devoured like courses at the French Laundry. He doesn’t brag that he’s the greatest chef in America. He’s quick to mention current chefs that he holds in esteem.

After reading the books, I felt relieved that I had never entered the food service industry. The baseball legend Stan Musuel once said that the secret to making a million dollars in the restaurant business is to start with two million dollars. Bourdain confirmed that it’s a nasty business. Also working the kitchen was a great way to have you hands lose that Palmolive smoothness.

On my list of things to do: Drink booze with Bourdain and jabber about Simpsons episodes. I’d wear an onion in my belt and bring twelve pounds of nutmeg as a gift.

SLAP ‘EM HARDER

Does My Super Sweet 16 collect the most conceited bunch of teenage girls in the history of television? How can a girl pick out an SUV because it matches her sunglasses. Or think their dad can book Green Day for their birthday party. The best was the girl who wanted Eminem. The guy hasn’t toured in a few years and he’s going to make a comeback for your bitchfest?  Maybe you can get D-12 for $75K. Do these gals understand the value of a dollar? Of course not. Although in a few years, they’ll be keeping track of twenties as they find themselves being videotaped by Brent Owens at the Point.

I want to have MTV rework this show so that on the morning of their birthday, these girls and their best friends all get jetted out to Iraq so they can “party” in Baghdad. Give ’em a bag of goodies, a map and best wishes for them to make it to the Green Zone.

BAG ‘EM, SANTA

If you only get one freakish holiday film this year, let it be Santa’s Slay. Basically it tells the story of how Santa went bad and slaughters everyone. Wrestling great Goldberg plays homicidal St. Nick. The opening scene alone is worth the rental as he butchers a family dinner including Chris Kattan and James Caan. It’s a short film so it mixes well with egg nogg.

GREEN NO MORE

It’s disgusting to see Rolling Rock beer ads that link the formerly fine green glass to St. Louis. Even more pathetic is knowing that instead of being brewed in Latrobe, Pennsylvania, the folks at Budweiser are making it in Newark, New Jersey. Is that a hint of jet fuel run off that I’m now tasting? Or is it merely the subtle decomposition of a former Tony Soprano business associate?

Rolling Rock, you no longer are a welcome guest in my fridge. Thanks for killing the joy, Budweiser dorks.

KRAMER RANT

The war on Festivus is on. Seems that a lot of people are angry that Festivus has passed Kwanza as America’s favorite 20th century winter holiday. So now they’ve blown out Michael Richards’ meltdown as to a reason to boycott anything Seinfeld related. As we all know, this is a major blow since Seinfeld was second only to Scarface in influencing rappers.

What’s worse is that now I’m unsure if it’s OK to invite minorities to my annual Festivus party. Is it now as wrong as inviting them to a cross burning with the BYO Marshmallows notice? Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton were on my invite list.

Let us keep Festivus as Festivus. We need to remember that it’s about Kramer and not Michael Richards. Although it is important to note that Michael Richards should be the guest of honor at every Festivus celebration. During the Airing of Grievances, it’s pretty easy to state how he disappointed us this season.

Is John Gibson going to help me protect Festivus?

WHAT’S ON TV NOW?

With The Wire, Dexter and Nip/Tuck all coming to the end of their short seasons, what will I be watching in January? Probably have to get drunk and watch American Idol with Mrs. Corey. Hopefully this season some kid will perform “Pac-Man Fever.”

SATURDAY MORNING FUN BLITZ

If you’re looking for gifts for folks who grew up in the 70s, you should dip into vintage Saturday morning shows that are now out on DVD. Groovie Goolies: Saturday Mourning Collection has all the episodes of this monsters meets Laugh-In series. Nothing too scary for the kids with Drac, Frankie and Wolfie telling goofy jokes and rockin’ out. Return to the Planet of the Apes collects all 13 episodes of this spin off of monkeys ruling the world. The show is much better than the live action TV series. Star Trek: The Animated Series finally lets me see this painted show that features the voice of Shatner and Nimoy. Why does this series get hidden in the closet and spited by Klingon speaking goofs? It’s perhaps one of the best written Saturday morning shows. Well it’s better than Goober and the Ghost Chasers.

As far as finishing up series, the fifth (and final) DVD of Speed Racer is out. I feel bad for kids hooked on Bob the Builder since they don’t know what making the Mach 5 is all about. Also the second half of Ultraman reminds us of that time when men in rubber monster suits ruled our universe.

Plus there’s Ark II a twisted live action show about a group of scientists roaming the post-apocalypse earth in a giant van to help out people. The scientists look like they escaped a porn set. Plus they have a talking monkey. Get it now.

With such wonders on DVD, you might actually wake up on Saturday morning to enjoy them properly with a bowl of Frankenberry.

COME ON DOWN!

Is Nigel Barker on America’s Next Top Model the secret love child of Bob Barker? He seems to have the Price Is Right legend’s smile and last name.

Have I already declared that Todd Newton (formerly of E! fame) is going to replace Bob when Barker retires? Newton’s been scoring well hosting the live Vegas version of the show. He won’t look like a complete rookie when Bob passes over the thin microphone.

AMY SEDARIS: I LIKE YOU

If you have to buy a woman a gift this year, get her Amy Sedaris’ I Like You. It’s her outrageous take on those Martha Stewart Entertaining books. There are actual useful tips within the jaw dropping suggestions. Plus there’s a great pic of Amy covered in sprinkles.

Amy Sedaris is on my list of three people I can have a torrid weekend in Las Vegas without the threat of a divorce. Originally Mrs. Corey thought it was a joke since she’d only seen her as the former crack whore that’s returned to high school on Strangers With Candy. She thought Amy was just killing space between Uma Thurman and Bea Arthur until Lisa Simpson turns 18. But after seeing Amy made up to look like a human cupcake, I’ve been placed on a diet.

BOWLED UNDER

Who is naming the bowls this year? Nothing says a great game like the San Diego Country Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl. Who isn’t pumped for the Papajohns.com Bowl? Does the loser have to ride to the airport after delivering a dozen pies in the area? And what is a New Mexico Bowl? Or a Texas Bowl? Since the International Bowl is played in Toronto, does that mean they’ll have a 110 yards to run? Which is more macho: The Brut Sun Bowl or Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl?

I’m reminded of the old Sports Monster joke about the Juggs Bowl. Now that would be a college halftime show worthy of our attention.

COWBOY UP

After talking about Randy Jones, the Cowboy from the Village People, I was forwarded his website: http://www.randyjonesworld.com. Seems that Randy has been extra busy over the past few years with low budget films and live performances. Way to go, Cowboy.

TIME TO BE WASTED

It’s oral surgery time and I’m hoping to get hooked up with the Vicodin. Last time I was on ’em, I kept getting calls from Amanda Peet wanting to know why my ass wasn’t on the set of Studio 60. Wait a minute, I’m not Matthew Perry. The bad part was the pills ran out just when my great country music song was rattling around in my head.

Toy Box: Spider-Man Origins 9″ figures

Filed under: Columns,Toy Box — admin @ 1:39 am
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Everyone is already wetting their pants over next year’s Spider-Man 3. The recently leaked trailer showing Venom was just more icing on an already huge cake of hype, and expectations haven’t been this high since Peter Jackson released the final film in the LOTR trilogy.

Of course, everyone will be on this bandwagon, and the Spider-Man toys will be hitting from every angle. One of those angles is called nostalgia, and that’s clearly the angle Hasbro is going for with the new Spider-Man Origins 9″ figures.

What? Did I say Hasbro? Yes, unless you’ve been partying with Lindsay Lohan for most of 2006, youi know that Toybiz is no more, and that Hasbro will be picking up the manufacture of the Marvel figures, including all new Spider-man goodies. The very first of Hasbro’s new product is now hitting shelves, including these 9″ guys.

This line is not intended to be the finest sculpts, although they aren’t too bad. It’s not intended to have the ultimate articulation, the largest number of accessories, or even the most realistic costumes. These things have been left to the more expensive line ups, like the work from Medicom in their 12″ Marvel line. No, this series is intended to tap into the kids (and adults who can still appreciate it) out there who have an affinity for the old Mego style of action figures.

Many adults grew up playing with the old Mego Spider-man and his friends, and now those same adults are the target audience to buy these for their own kids – or perhaps themselves.

“Spider-Man and Doctor Octopus”

This first series includes four figures – Spider-man, Symbiote (black costume) Spider-man, Green Goblin and Doctor Octopus. If there was any question as to whether the movies had an influence, look no further than this debut line up for proof.

I’m going to review two of these – Doc Ock and regular Spidey – here today, with the other two getting the treatment at MROTW. Fans of DC 9″ figures, Famous Covers and yes, even Megos should be pretty happy. For everyone else, these won’t be your cup of java.

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Packaging – ***1/2
I like these boxes quite a bit, although they aren’t the most collector friendly. You don’t have to destroy anything getting them out, but there’s enough twistie ties and rubber bands holding them in place that you’ll never put them back again. Too bad they couldn’t follow the Famous Covers route and just use the molded tray to hold them in position.

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Yes, that’s the black costume Spidey in the photo above. Each of the boxes is personalized to the character with the large head shot to the right (or his left), and the coolest of these is Green Goblin, whose eye is actually done in ‘3-D’.

Sculpting – Spider-man ***; Doc Ock **1/2
These figures are done using the same bodies as the old DC 9″ figures from a few years back. You may remember characters like Batman and Penguin, Joker, Martian Manhunter, Batman Beyond, or even the NASCAR drivers that were produced 5 or 6 years ago using this body. Now that Hasbro has the Marvel characters under their wing, they’ve decided to release some of those comic characters in the same style and size.

Both of these figures sport sharper lines and deeper cuts than you might have expected, but it works well for the most part. The Spidey sculpt on the head, hands and boots actually remindes me a bit of the Icons version, with the deeply set lines for the webbing. However, unlike the Icons version, he appears to have a nose underneath the mask. His left hand is sculpted in the usual kung-fu grip style, but the right is done with the fingers in a permanent web shooting pose.

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Both heads are solid plastic and not hollow, thank goodness, which means they hold harsh detail much better. Perhaps the detail is a little too harsh on old Ock though, who has a deeply etched face. His hair has great detail though, and while the expression isn’t one of my favorites, it’s accetable.

The boots and gloves are done the same way as the old figures, with solid plastic uppers on the forearms and calves, and sculpted hands and feet with articulation. The suits are glued up underneat these plastic uppers, holding them firmly in place.

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Paint – Doc Ock ***; Spider-man **1/2
While the paint work on these isn’t stellar by any means, it’s fairly consistent with other mass market toys.

Doc Ock has the better technical application, with clean lines between colors and little to no bleed. The small teeth are well done, and there’s no sign of the black from the glasses on any of the face. However, his skin tone is the color the head was cast in, and that makes the finish on the skin quite glossy. I’d have prefered a painted face as well, but at this price point I’m not surprised.

Spidey isn’t as clean, particularly aroudn the eyes and webbing lines on the head. There’s quite a bit of slop with the white in particular, and it’s not as consistent in thickness and coverage either.

Articulation – ***
If you picked up any of the old DC 9″ figures, you’ll know what to expect here. There’s a cut neck, ball jointed hips and shoulders, pin elbows and knees, pin wrists and ankles, cut biceps, cut waist, and the hinged chest joint. Oh, and let’s not forget the pin joint through the fingers, allowing them to open and close all as one unit.

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This isn’t exactly Medicom articulation, but it works pretty well in this scale. The ball jointed shoulders are a little restricted, and I really would like to see a ball jointed neck, but the figures can still take quite a few decent poses. On top of the standard articulation, each of the four tentacles on Doc Ock are bendy, and work pretty well.

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Accessories – Bupkis
If you count the good Doctor’s arms and belt as part of his overall outfit, then these figures are accessory-less. That’s a bit of a disappointment, considering the price point, but it does seem that short of getting goofy, coming up with good accessories in the Spider-man lines has always been a problem.

Outfit – ***
Both figures have cloth uniforms, sewn up tight in the back and glued in under the cuffs and boots. They fit pretty tightly, or at least as tightly as this thicker material can. Any time you twist or bend the arms or legs you’ll see wrinkles, but that’s the nature of cloth.

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In fact, the outifts fit a little too tight in some areas, sucking their way into the hip joints a bit more than you’d like. I’m not going to complain too loudlly though, since I prefer too tight to too loose.

The printing of the web pattern on Spidey’s costume looks great, and the bright blue and red are nice and consistent. The red of the costume doesn’t quite match the red of the plastic, but it’s fairly close considering the differences in the materials.

Doc Ock also has a removable belt with his outfit, which is very plain and basic. His glasses are part of the head sculpt and not removable.

Fun Factor – ***1/2
These aren’t the prettiest figures you’ll see on the shelves, but they are a lot of fun. I also think the size is really good, coming in between the large and often difficult to handle 12″ figures, but more meaty than the 6″ scale. Of course, for the adults who collected either the old Famous Covers line or the DC 9″ Heroes line, these will fit right in.

Value – **1/2
I’m not in the least bit surprised these are $15 – I can’t see them really being offered for less. Still, it’s merely an average, getting what you paid for value, unlike the much larger Icons which cost the same amount.

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Things to Watch Out For –
Not much. I popped off a tentacle when posing Ock, but it popped right back in again. I think they’re all supposed to be glued, but I wasn’t going to start yanking on the rest to see. Even if they are removable, it’s unlikely you’d pose him without them.

Overall – ***
If you’re looking for cutting edge, you best be looking elsewhere. These are old school through and through, and are likely to appeal to geezers who fondly remember Megos more than kids and adults looking for hyper-articulated, ultra modern sculpts. But if you know what you’re getting going in – and don’t unfairly compare them to things that they were never meant to compete with – then you may be pleasantly surprised.

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Scoring Recap:
Packaging – ***1/2
Sculpt – Spider-Man ***; Doc Ock **1/2
Paint – Doc Ock ***; Spidey **1/2
Articulation – ***
Accessories – Bupkis
Outfit – ***
Fun Factor ***1/2
Value – **1/2
Overall – ***

Where to Buy –
Stores like Toys R Us and Target are your best bet at this point.

Related Links –
I have a ton of Spider-Man related reviews out there of course, but the two most recent – and relevant – include the other half of this review, which looks at the 9″ Symbiote Spider-man and Green Goblin, and the new 12″ Spider-Man in the Marvel Legends Icons line up.

QSE News: 12/5/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:32 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgFamously abrasive Brit-Rocker Noel Gallagher, of Oasis, recently performed some of his band’s greatest hits in a fan’s living room. All in attendance left confused, some even doubting it was the real Noel performing, as he wasn’t piss-drunk, made no sarcastic comments directed at audience members and didn’t start a single fight with his equally sympathetic brother Liam.
  • Sir Paul McCartney has admitted that he has been seeing a psychiatrist ever since his split with actress/model/gold digger, Heather Mills.  Sources close to Macca have revealed that the majority of the sessions are dealing with McCartney’s “separation anxiety” over the potential loss of half his fortune and his depression over the “drastic life changes” he’ll be faced with once he is a billionaire, as opposed to a multi-billionaire.
  • Ironically, one of the “stars” of Fox’s hit show, Prison Break, may be headed to the “big house””¦ for real.  Police are investigating Lane Garrison’s involvement in a car-crash over the weekend that left a 17-year-old boy dead and two 15-year-old girls injured.  If convicted of any “wrong-doing” in this case, Garrison will be able to prove, to himself at least, if his portrayal on the show is “authentic” and if the old prison adage, “Sleep on your back, not on yo’ belly or you might wake up with a butt full of jelly,” is actually true.
  • Former lead singer of Stone Temple Pilots and current lead singer of Velvet Revolver, Scott Weiland, is set to release his second solo album at the end of next year. The new disc will feature a number of “collaborations,” including a 12 minute, “loosely coherent” song penned by Weiland and his long-time collaborator and frequent companion, heroin.
  • In comic book news, film director John Woo is joining forces with comic writer Garth Ennis and several others to create Virgin Comics.  The new imprint will publish comics from Woo and Ennis as well as a new book from former Eurythmics front man Dave Stewart.  When asked about how they settled on the name for the new publishing house, Woo claimed that it is in no way a reference to the fact that comic book readers are, in fact, all virgins.
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That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 12/5/2006

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:24 am
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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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  • Kaspar Hauser pitch their must-have holiday catalog, Skymaul(Thingamabob)
  • Chirs Rock give Nostrodamus a run for his money… (Thingamabob)
  • I can think of no more disturbing way to teach bicycle safety than this… (Thingamabob)
  • Simon Amstell eviscerating Britney Spears… (Thingamabob)

Have a THINGAMABOB? Send it in!

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December 4, 2006

Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review Homicide: Life on the Series: The Complete Series

Filed under: Columns,Nocturnal Admissions — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:08 am
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If The Wire were a book it would be the Great American Novel. The series, now coming to the end of its fourth season, has scope, depth, and breath. Like a Dickens novel, it mixes artistry and social protest, entertainment and essay. But because The Wire is an HBO show it’s not viewed as the great sweeping tale of America that it has turned out to be, and with luck will continue to be in its fifth and presumably final season.

But now, as The Wire comes to a close until sometime in 2007, there are those among us who hunger for more of the same: narrative complexity, multilayed, diverse characters, a general intelligence and respect for the audience’s ability to keep up.

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If so there is no better place to turn than Homicide: Life on the Street, the NBC crime drama that ran from January 1993 to May 1999. Produced by Barry Levinson, the show was based on the book of the same title by then Baltimore Sun reporter David Simon, who spent a year following the city’s homicide detectives. Though the credits tell us that Homicide was created by critic-turned-screenwriter Paul Attanasio, all accounts indicated that Tom Fontana was the real brains behind the show. Fontana also worked on St. Elsewhere and later HBO’s Oz. Fontana doesn’t have anything to do with The Wire, but after eventually beginning to write episodes of Homicide, Simon adapted first one of his other books, The Corner, into an HBO mini-series and then went on to create the complex multi-leveled universe of The Wire. Interested viewers or fans of the show can now dive into Homicide: Life on the Street, which has been re-released on DVD by A&E, all seven seasons plus the TV movie and numerous extras offered up together for $299, packaged as a homicide department file cabinet (this box hit the street on November 14).

Tom Fontana

Homicide begins with the arrival of Detective Tim Bayliss (Kyle Secor) to the homicide unit let by Lt. Al Giardello (Yaphet Kotto, who has the opposite of a widow’s peak, i.e., hair to grows so low on his forehead it looks like a cap). Through his eyes we meet the other members of the division and their frustrations. In the course of seven seasons, various of these people commit suicide, die or are at least shot, retire, have heart attacks, or just stay the course. In the timeline of the seven seasons, Bayliss flubs his first case (the murder of a little girl), his partner flubs another (a female serial killer of Catholic women who is institutionalized instead of indicted), and three cops get shot when serving an arrest warrant. Surprisingly, all three survive, though one of them is later killed off, and this multi-episode sequence provides a great part for Steve Buscemi. The biggest story arc of the series is the one that most mirrors or anticipates The Wire. That’s the long-term pursuit of crime king Luther Mahoney (Erik Todd Dellums) and later his sister, Georgia Rae. These campaigns cover the end of season four through the end of season six, and the characters are based on the same real life criminals who inspired the Barksdale clan and some of their satellites in The Wire. A lot of the actors overlap, too.

Beatty and Waters

Homicide fell into its stride in the third season and got better through the fourth to the sixth. Season one is only nine episodes long, and season two only four, so they are housed together in the set’s first box. The final season is widely viewed as the weakest of all, with by then numerous new cast members such as Michael Michele, and the introduction of Giardello’s estranged son, Mike (Giancarlo Esposito), an FBI agent who ends up working out of the unit. The show was a critics’ darling and continually underperformed in the ratings, despite several attempts to piggyback off of Law and Order. NBC held out as long as it could but eventually cancelled the show.

Subway

Part of the reason the critics liked the show had to do with its quirky aspects. Reservoir Dogs had come out the year before Homicide made its debut and you can see a tinge of its influence, intentional or not, in the show’s opening dialogues, in which trivial matters are belabored by the irritable cops, such as the fixation by Crosetti (Jon Polito) on Lincoln’s assassination. Homicide was unique at the time for enlisting the aid of movie stars (Ned Beatty, for example) and comics (Richard Belzer) to shake up the casting. The show used hand held 16mm cameras, utilized jump cuts, and on occasion repeated the same second or so of a shot for emphasis. The opening credit music was scary, more appropriate for a horror show that a cop drama. And the show was one of modern pioneers in the use of dynamic music or unexpected rock songs over montage sequences. The most famous episode of the whole series is episode six of season seven (though it should have been broadcast fourth), “The Subway,” the one with Vincent D’Onofrio as John Lange (one of the show’s many in-jokes: Lange is one of Michael Crichton’s many pseudonyms), a businessman crushed under a subway car, who is going to die as soon as the car is removed, but whose girlfriend the team is trying to locate before he dies (the premise was later used by Shyamalan in Signs). The set also includes the terrific PBS documentary about the making of the episode.

Given all this, why do I remain unconvinced? It is intentional but the show is a little harsh and ungiving, which is alienating, but at the same time all too frequently relies on clichés of the prime time crime show. In addition, the two main characters, Bayliss and his partner Detective Frank Pembleton (Andre Braugher) are rather unpleasant. Bayliss is an idealist, naive do-gooder who intellectualizes his investigations (and is subtly ridiculed for doing so), and who as the show goes on becomes a Buddhist and a bisexual. His descendent is Dutch on The Shield. Pembleton is a vain, arrogant, egotistical character who views himself as the only good cop on the staff. It’s hard to get behind his various causes and battles. My resistance to theses characters may have something to do with the actors, who get better as the show goes along, but in the first three years give unconvincing line readings and bad yelling scenes.

The show is also occasionally inconsistent. Take the next-to-last episode of season three, the one in which Bayliss’s cousin (David Morse) shoots a Turkish youth trying to get into his house. Bayliss, naturally, takes a special interest in the progress of the case, but meets resistance from his unit members, even though different characters in different stories in the same season looked out for their peers. While interviewing the cousin, Pemberton says, “We’re not here to judge you,” which is simply not true, since in private conversations the cops are constantly judging suspects and criminals. But that is the fatal flaw of most cop shows. Both suspects and victims are usually viewed as somehow lacking or the cause of their own misfortune, while the cops are always privileged, with their problems and private lives highlighted and brooded over. It’s interesting to reflect back on shows such as Arrest and Trial and The FBI which had surprisingly sympathetic accounts of both victims and crooks. But these codicils aside, the show has some creative tales and many good supporting or guest cast turns. Across the 35 discs of the set the sound production is adequate, and the transfers improve as the shows become more recent.

Adrienne Shelley

If you have already been collecting the Homicide series as they were originally released, there may be little reason to buy this box for yourself, unless you really need the new extras, or the addition of the concluding Homicide TV movie. There are commentary tracks on the episodes “Gone For Goode,” “Gas Man,” “The Hat,” “The Documentary,” “The Subway,” and “Forgive Us Our Trespasses” along with video interviews with Levinson, Fontana, Simon, and writer James Yoshimura, among others and all related Homicide related shows, such as the “To Catch A Killer: Homicide Detectives” Episode of A&E’s American Justice, the Superbowl XXVII commercials for S1, song Listings, a text feature “The Board,” or the erasure board of solved and unsolved murders, “Inside Homicide” featuring David Somin and Yoshimura, the already mentioned “Anatomy of a Homicide,” plus video of various public events and speeches by show originators. On a final bonus disc are all the Law & Order crossover episodes (“Charm City,” “Baby It’s You,” “Sideshow”) and Homicide: The Movie.

If you got this far in the review you are one of the few to know that on Tuesday, I will be offering another DVD giveaway. Hint: it will be one of the bigger DVDs streeting that day.

QSE News: 12/4/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:02 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgFestival organizers have announced the official lineup for 2007’s Sundance Film Festival. Festival goers will be able to enjoy such films as Untitled Dakota Fanning Project and Four Sheets to the Wind, as well as the new picture from Harry Bawls, Anal Queens 26: In Through the Out Door.
  • Author Iain Hollingshead has won this years prestigious “Bad Sex in Fiction” award. Hollingshead said he was planning on celebrating the award by going home and taking his wife to “a pleasure land known only to those that have experienced the wonders of putting a giant, throbbing rod inside a warm, cozy, moist cavern.”
  • The Eagles of Death Metal have officially responded, live, on camera, about what happened on their ill fated Guns “˜N Roses tour. We here at QSE don’t believe this for a second. If there is one completely sane person on this planet, it’s Axl Rose. We stand with you Axl.
  • Loveable small-person Danny DeVito showed up on The View drunk last week. When asked to comment on the appearance, co-host Rosie O’Donnell said she would still eat him.
  • And finally today, Lindsay Lohan is said to have been attending Alcoholic Anonymous meetings. Lohan reportedly begun attending the AA meeting because she figured it would be a good way for her to get alcohol, anonymously.
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That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 12/4/2006

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:49 am
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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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  • Where has this Letterman been for the past 15 years? (Thingamabob)
  • The final minutes of the legendary Otto Preminger theatrical disaster, Skidoo, featuring tunes by the equally legendary (but in a good way) Harry Nilsson… (Thingamabob)
  • Meet the merry Marvel Comics staff of the 1960’s… (Thingamabob)
  • Vic Reeves & The Wonderstuff – “Dizzy”… (Thingamabob)

Have a THINGAMABOB? Send it in!

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December 1, 2006

Comics in Context #156: Canon Fodder

Filed under: Columns,Comics in Context — admin @ 6:46 pm
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cic2006-12-01-01.jpgSometimes when I spend weeks working on a certain topic for this column, there are moments of serendipity.

For example, currently on Saturday mornings, Turner Classic Movies has been running the 1950 Columbia serial Atom Man vs. Superman, in the course of which Superman is projected into an extradimensional void called “the Empty Void.” Superman thereupon appears in ghostly form on Earth, unseen by the people there. Did this serial, I wondered, inspire the later creation of the Phantom Zone in the comics?

But the serendipity occurred after last Saturday’s (Nov. 25) last episode of the serial concluded. Next TCM showed one of its “One Reel Wonders,” an episode of the MGM short subject series called The Passing Parade. This installment was titled People on Paper, and turned out to be about leading comic strip artists of the mid-20th century. So there, captured on film, were several of the men honored as “Masters of American Comics” by the museum exhibition of the same name: Milton Caniff (Terry and the Pirates), Chester Gould (Dick Tracy), and Frank King (Gasoline Alley), as they looked in their prime. There too on film were Dick Calkins (Buck Rogers), Al Capp (Li’l Abner), Hal Foster (Prince Valiant), Harold Gray (Little Orphan Annie), and Chic Young (Blondie). Had I not been taken by surprise, I would have taped this short. I had never before known this short subject existed, and I suspect neither do most comics historians.

On the day before (Friday, Nov. 24), one of The New York Times‘s art critics, Holland Cotter reviewed the new exhibition “Africa Comics” at the Studio Museum in Harlem and remarked that “I guess there are people who still can’t fit the idea of “˜art’ and “˜comics’ into the same frame. But why? If handmade, graphically inventive, conceptually imaginative images – which describes practically everything in this show – aren’t art, what is?” Cotter refers to these “people” as if they are a handful of artistic reactionaries who have fallen behind the times and are out of step with contemporary thinking. Yet when I started “Comics in Context,” a little over three years ago, the Times neither reviewed nor reported on nor ran comics regularly. The Times ran an obituary for comics artist Dave Cockrum, the co-creator of The X-Men‘s Colossus, Nightcrawler and Storm, on Wednesday, Nov. 28, only two days after his death. Twelve years ago it took the Times several weeks before it noticed the passing of Jack Kirby. The cultural shift regarding comics has happened very quickly, though I suspect it is not as widespread as Cotter assumes.

By the way, I heartily recommend Peter Gillis’s beautifully written tribute to Dave Cockrum. Here are the key lines: “In a better world, Dave, once he was in the place where the universe had intended he should be, should have just continued to do whatever he wanted, because whatever he wanted was just so right. But that’s not the way the Comics Industry works.”

Cotter continues, “In any event, Pop Art and all that followed it long ago wiped out the notion that comics are one-liner sight gags good only for the “˜funny pages.'” As I’ve pointed out before, the conventional wisdom about Pop Art was that artists like Roy Lichtenstein and Andy Warhol had transformed supposedly trashy, banal imagery from the comics into true art. The 1960s Batman TV show remains Exhibit #1 in the case of mainstream culture’s attitude towards comics in the era of Pop Art. Now I am beginning to wonder if the growing artistic respectability of comics will lead to revisionist art history, with people contending that art critics and scholars have been taking comics seriously for decades.

In passing Cotter comments that “”˜Masters of American Comics,’ the ambitious historical survey split between the Jewish Museum in Manhattan and the Newark Museum, is truly a masterpiece show.” Indeed it is, and it’s noteworthy that now two Times critics have highly praised the show. (The first was senior art critic Michael Kimmelman)

It was through another serendipitous event that I found the key for writing about the last lap of the “Masters” show. On Monday, Nov. 20 cartoonist and comics theorist Scott McCloud, author of Understanding Comics and Reinventing Comics, gave a lecture at New York University as part of his year-long “50 State Making Comics Tour“ to promote his latest book, Making Comics (HarperCollins, $22.95).

During his presentation McCloud expounded on one of the major ideas from his new book, that there are what he calls four basic “tribes” of comics artists. (See “Understanding Comics Culture” in Making Comics, pages 229-239).

First there are the Classicists, whom he characterizes by “the devotion to beauty, craftsmanship and a tradition of excellence and mastery,” showing panels by Hal Foster, Colleen Doran, and P. Craig Russell in his book as examples.

Next are the Animists, who are characterized by “the devotion to the content of a work, putting craft entirely in the service of its subject,” so that “the teller of the story all but vanishes in the telling.” In the book he presents as examples panels by Jack Kirby (from Fantastic Four), Lynn Johnston (from her comic strip For Better or for Worse) and Dan DeCarlo (of Betty and Veronica).

Then there are the Formalists, who have a “devotion to comics itself, to figuring out what the form of comics is capable of,” and who experiment with that form. In this category McCloud includes Will Eisner (in his NYU presentation), Art Spiegelman (in the book), and himself.

Finally, there are the Iconoclasts, who aim above all for “honesty, authenticity, and a connection to real life”; McCloud points to Robert Crumb’s and Harvey Kurtzman’s work as examples. That seems to describe the Iconoclasts’ philosophies more than their visual style. My take on what McCloud is getting at is this: the Iconoclasts are less concerned with conventional notions of beauty and craft, nor with formal innovation nor with working within conventional story genres. Hence their visual style may look rough or primitive, because they “see art primarily through life’s lens” in McCloud’s phrase: art becomes the means to their end of conveying their ideas about life.

McCloud states that his “four tribes correspond roughly” to psychologist Carl Jung’s “four proposed functions of human thought.” Hence McCloud links Classicists to Sensation, Animists to Intuition, Formalists to Thinking, and Iconoclasts to Feeling.

McCloud writes that “most comics creators” would like to achieve “goals from all four of these groups.” He also observes that a comics artist can display “a strong attraction to two of these ideals”: in the book he classifies Caniff as both an Animist (since he makes storytelling primary) and a Classicist (due to his “impeccable compositions”).

With regard to these four sets of values, McCloud states that “usually, you can tell which one burns brightest for a given creator, and there’s almost always one of the four that burns rarely or not at all for them.”

To McCloud’s great credit, he does not contend that one of the four “tribes” is superior to the others. After all, there are many supporters of Iconoclast and Formalist comics who take a condescending attitude towards the genre comics favored by Animists and Classicists, as any issue of The Comics Journal will demonstrate.

McCloud’s theory of “tribes” should also serve to remind critics to be humble. If no “tribe’s” artistic philosophy is superior to the others, then no “tribe’s” point of view contains the whole truth about comics. To state that “one of the four. . .burns rarely or not at all” for someone suggests that he or she may have a blind spot. There are some comics that he or she does not “get,” but that may be true for everyone.

But how does McCloud’s theory of tribes apply to people other than comics artists? For example, what about museum curators who delve into comics?

The “Masters of American Comics” museum exhibition and its catalogue from Yale University Press are primarily Formalist. That explains why Hal Foster and Alex Raymond (Flash Gordon), both considered such titans of the artform, were not included in the show: they are first class Classicists. When co-curator Brian Walker stated that “storytellers” such as Carl Barks and Walt Kelly, who were not considered graphic innovators, were excluded, he was saying that they were primarily Animists. Nonetheless, some Animists made it in. Co-curator John Carlin confessed that E. C. Segar (Popeye) was not an innovator but was included because of his mastery of conveying character and comedy. In the catalogue, while Carlin describes “formal” aspects of Caniff’s work, his text primarily praises Caniff as a storyteller. But if Carlin is attracted to two of McCloud’s “ideals,” then they would be Formalism and Iconoclasm, which accounts for the inclusion of the last four Masters in the show: Robert Crumb, Art Spiegelman, Gary Panter, and Chris Ware. (Spiegelman dropped out of the exhibit’s New York engagement, so I won’t discuss him this week, but I have previously written about his work in “Comics in Context” #59, 60, 61 and 64.)

I don’t entirely agree with McCloud’s classification of Eisner as a Formalist. True, in his role as comics theorist and teacher, Eisner pursued the formalist concern of studying the visual language of comics. In emphasizing Eisner’s innovative splash pages for The Spirit, the “Masters” show portrays him as a Formalist. But I recall hearing Eisner say, “I don’t want to be in the graphic novel section” of a bookstore (see “Comics in Context” #6). He wanted his books shelved alongside prose novels; this suggests that the story content was more important to Eisner than the visuals. Apart from Eisner’s experiments with splash pages and such, isn’t The Spirit really an Animist work, in which the dynamic visuals primarily serve to convey the story? Is the reason why Eisner’s graphic novels were mostly excluded from the show that they are so Animist?

McCloud correctly classifies Kirby as an Animist, but the “Masters” show brings out other aspects of his work. In focusing on Kirby’s experimentation with “patterning,” the “Masters” show reveals his Formalist side. In writing about the sculptural, monumental look of the figures of Galactus, the Silver Surfer, and the Thing on display, I was viewing Kirby as, in part, a Classicist.

How does McCloud’s theory of tribes apply to a critic like myself? Considering that I taught a course at NYU called “Comics as Literature” and that I argued a few weeks ago that the essence of comics is storytelling, it’s clear that I am primarily an Animist in my approach to the visual dimension of comics: the art serves the story. As someone who spends part of most Saturdays visiting art museums, I’m also a Classicist, who appreciates sheer beauty and craftsmanship. (My original title for “Comics in Context” #132, about the Dahesh Museum’s show of classic American illustration, was “Gallery of Glory.”) My training in the comics business is also Classicist. When I interviewed artists John Romita, Sr. and John Romita, Jr., both Marvel mainstays, at the recent Big Apple Con, they both emphasized storytelling above all. Looking at the formal aspects of comics artwork does not come automatically to me, but I can do it, I find it interesting, and I appreciate the Masters book for providing guidance to me in this approach. The flame that “burns rarely or not at all” for me is that of the Iconoclasts. There are major exceptions. I enjoy Harvey Pekar’s American Splendor, which tends to use Iconoclast artists (see “Comics in Context” #64, 73). I admire Crumb’s work, though I simply do not become as enthusiastic about it as I do about the work of most of the earlier Masters. But I am left cold by many alternative cartoonists who take an Iconoclastic approach, as with the work in the “Speak: Nine Cartoonists” gallery show earlier this year (see “Comics in Context” #122, which I originally, pointedly titled “Gallery of Gloom” before IGN changed it). When I visited the “Masters” show with Museum of Comic and Cartoon Art president Ken Wong, I surprised him by telling him I didn’t “get” Panter’s work. Now I know that it’s outside my tribe: I’m an Animist/Classicist.

This is how I react to the visual side of comics, but how does McCloud’s theory of tribes apply to the writing side of the medium? McCloud says that Animists are intuitive. That applies to my first reading of a comic, when I’m just looking for its entertainment value. But as any reader of “Comics in Context” knows, I take a highly analytical approach to evaluating the writing of comics, delving into the mythic and literary archetypes underlying characters and plots. This makes me a Formalist, which McCloud associates with “thinking” in Jung’s “functions of human thought.” It’s clear that I’m also a Classicist, since I value the traditional genres in comics and cartoon art. So with regard to the writing side of comics, I’m a Classicist/Formalist.

With regard to writing, too, the flame that “burns rarely” for me is that of Iconoclasm, but not because I’m averse to “honesty, authenticity, and a connection to real life,” as McCloud puts it. For one thing, I think that fantasy can comment honestly and seriously on real life; one of comics’ strengths is its ability to create and utilize metaphors for reality. My real aversion to much of Iconoclast comics is due to the attitude that many Iconoclast comics writers take towards reality. As I stated in my review of the “Speak” show, Crumb’s work stood out from the rest in the “Gallery of Gloom” because he leavened his observations with comedy rather than miring himself in depression and despair like the others. McCloud writes that the Iconoclasts look at life “warts and all”: in too many cases, I contend, they fixate on only the warts.

So, as I moved through the “Masters” show, once I exited the Eisner and Kirby room, I was entering increasingly alien territory.

Next came Harvey Kurtzman (1924-1993), the creator and original editor and writer of MAD, and the only one of the Masters whom I have not previously written about. This section had the most appalling case of mislabeling in the entire show: here was the cover to MAD #12, featuring a characteristically grotesque female face drawn by Basil Wolverton, that was even signed by Wolverton, and yet the accompanying label attributed it entirely to Kurtzman! A nearby vitrine held various stages in the creation of “Little Annie Fanny in Greenwich Village” for the September 1963 issue of Playboy, credited on the label to Kurtzman, Will Elder, and Russ Heath: there are pages drawn in pen and ink, then a version in colored pencils and watercolor, and finally the printed pages. But the labels don’t explain what the specific roles of each of the three artists were in crafting this strip. The Masters book makes the matter clearer (pgs. 116-118), but still does not sufficiently explain the collaborative process for the benefit of those who don’t know who did what. Another annoyance is the labeling for pages from the story “3-Dimensions!” from MAD #12 (June 1954). Both the show’s labeling and the book (p. 114) credit the pages to Kurtzman and Wally Wood, but again without explaining the nature of the collaboration. (Did Wood draw over Kurtzman’s layouts?) Considering that Wood is a major figure in comics history who could himself have been included as one of the Masters, it seems unjust that the show and book treat him as an unexplained footnote to Kurtzman’s saga.

For me the highlight of the Kurtzman section were examples from his EC war comics. The “online slide show” accompanying Kimmelman’s Times review of “Masters” includes the opening page of “Air Burst!”, illustrated by Kurtzman, from Frontline Combat #4 (February 1952). (See here, or Masters pgs. 113 and 271.) In his essay in the Masters catalogue, Village Voice film critic J. Hoberman points out that “Kurtzman’s war comic books showcased his boldest, most abstract drawing. The thick line and copious use of black suggest gouged-out woodcuts. . .” (p. 272). These thick, dark outlines of the figures contribute to this “abstract” element by emphasizing them as simple shapes: the fleeing North Korean soldiers in the first panel are basically ovals with smaller ovals as heads. The emphatic outlines also focus the readers’ attention on the figures’ overall body language and movement. Those two soldiers in the top panel aren’t standing up straight: their backs curve forward, as if they are crouching while at the same time they run forward, as if trying to hide from the bombs bursting overhead.

The “Masters” show and the book (pgs. 110-111) include the entire war story “Corpse on the Imjin!”, illustrated by Kurtzman, from Two-Fisted Tales #25 (February 1952), which Carlin analyzes in detail in the catalogue (p. 112). I was particularly impressed by the way in which an American soldier and a North Korean soldier, battling each other, combine into what becomes a single, united, heavily outlined shape, which could be regarded as semi-abstract, as the American forces his foe under the surface of the river to drown. The Korean’s blood escapes into the water, turning it not red but in Kurtzman’s rendition, black: it is as if the American were plunging his adversary into a black void. Kimmelman declared this combat sequence “turns hand-to-hand combat into pure visual poetry. It’s a model of economy and dark human truth and, above all, of how the best comic artists organize and pace drama and text across a page.” Despite stating elsewhere in his review that the essence of comics was abstraction, Kimmelman recognizes that comics is visual storytelling, too. McCloud may class Kurtzman as an Iconoclast, and he is the progenitor of that school, but Carlin, Hoberman, and Kimmelman perceive his Formalist aspect and salute him as a master visual storyteller as well. So I still felt at home looking over his war comics pages.

Carlin writes that “One of Kurtzman’s most enduring attributes was his development of the self-reflexive, ironic aspect of modern comics. . . .” (p. 114). By this Carlin doesn’t just mean Kurtzman’s parodies of other comics in MAD, or even inserting characters representing the writer and artist into MAD stories, but also his satirical use of the conventions of the comics medium itself. Hence, the aforementioned “3-Dimensions” story ends with the characters toppling out of a panel into blank space on the page; the final page of the story is entirely blank. I am reminded of similar postmodernist stunts in Tex Avery’s animated cartoons (e. g., the Wolf running seemingly right off the frame of the film into a white void). At another point in “3-Dimensions!”, a “hole” is drawn onto a page, enabling characters to see and step through to a following page; whether he was aware Kurtzman had done it or not, John Byrne used a similar gag decades later in The Sensational She-Hulk.

The next Master is Robert Crumb (born in 1943, and the first Master who is still alive), about whom Carlin asserts, “no one before Crumb made comics that were so directly about themselves and their own mental state” (p. 125); this made his work revolutionary, pioneering underground comix and spawning the alternative comics movement.

A particularly interesting selection in the book is “The Many Faces of R. Crumb” from XYZ Comics in 1972 (pgs. 124-125), in which Crumb draws himself in many different guises, each representing a different side of his personality. Carlin writes that this illustrates Crumb’s “fractured sense of self” (p. 126). To me it also suggests, consciously or not, that the many different characters in Crumb’s work might all be based on aspects of himself, and that this by extension may be true for all writers.

I was quite surprised upon seeing a Crumb sketchbook on display. Alternating with drawings of Fritz the Cat were pencil studies of women, which, unfortunately, are not reproduced in the catalogue. Though Crumb is well known for drawing large, massive, formidable females, who seem to simultaneously embody male lusts for and fears of the opposite sex, these sketchbook drawings, softly modulated in pencil, were surprisingly, appealingly beautiful. Here, unexpectedly, was Crumb the Classicist. But as Francoise Mouly points out in her essay in the catalogue, Crumb is a man of seeming contradictions.

Next I advanced into the Gary Panter (born in 1950) section and found myself amidst nearly pure Iconoclasm. All of the Masters from McCay through Kurtzman were creating their work for a general audience, even if, in the cases of Kirby and Kurtzman (at EC), that audience was then considered to consist of children. With Crumb this began to change: originally his underground work was sold through head shops to a niche audience. Spiegelman and the alternative school that followed in his wake aimed at an even more elite audience. As Carlin puts it, “It was not until the contemporary era. notably in [Spiegelman’s] RAW magazine and the artists it helped to promote and nurture, that the graphic character of the comics overtly became as important as story and character. Comics became “˜art’ in a deliberate manner rather than sneaking in through the backdoor of popular culture.” (p. 140). Through its selection of Masters, the show seems to imply that this is the Formalist/Iconoclastic route that comics with claims to be museum-caliber art took after the 1960s. But as McCloud would surely argue, Formalism and Iconoclasm are merely two of the four value sets of comics. To dismiss post-1960s Classicist and Animist comics is a mistake.

With Panter the Classicist ideal of beauty and mastery of traditional craft is abandoned. Carlin refers to Panter’s “scratchy line work” and writes about Panter’s Jimbo Meets Rat-Boy (1979) that “The lettering and line work are deliberately crude and filled with scribbles and seeming mistakes that take on an artful pattern in spite of themselves” (p. 140). You can see for yourself in a page from a later work, Jimbo Is Stepping Off the Edge of a Cliff! from Jimbo circa 1988 (Here, or Masters p. 149). Carlin contends that “The new jagged approach he pioneered created a sense of psychological expression in comics. . . “ (p. 140), and that Panter “expresses himself through the character of his line” (p. 158). It’s like the distortions of expressionism taken to the extreme limit, and the emotions being expressed range from angst into sheer horror.

My Classicist sensibility finds no ground to stand within this ultimate Iconoclasm. But it’s not just the look of Panter’s comics that dissatisfy me, but also the worldview of his writing. Describing the “postapocalyptic world” of Panter’s tales, Carlin writes that “Panter took his stories out of this world into a future that is actually closer to the way we live now than we are willing to express. Jimbo wanders a wrecked zone where nuclear explosion is a metaphor for modern America” (p. 146). I’m not “willing to express” it because I don’t believe it. I simply do not share this utterly negative and nihilistic vision of modern America or contemporary life.

Ironically, I very much like Panter’s work as art director for the 1980s television series Pee-Wee’s Playhouse. In part it’s because his work there on three-dimensional objects has solidity rather than this “scratchy” quality Carlin describes. It’s also because the Playhouse work is in the service of comedy, rather than the over the top apocalyptic despair of his comics work.

The last of the Masters, Chris Ware, was born in 1967, making him a post-Boomer, the only Master younger than myself. With his elaborately, intricately designed division of his comics pages into panels, Ware is very much a Formalist. But in his catalogue essay, novelist Dave Eggers argues that Ware is, in effect, a Classicist as well: “I think it’s beautiful in the way that [novelist Vladimir] Nabokov’s work is beautiful. In both cases it’s clear that the creator believes in beauty for its own sake, and, more crucially, is capable of creating beauty anywhere and always” (p. 312). Moreover, Eggers believes that “Ware looks fondly back to a time before modernism crushed almost all of art’s flourishes, eccentricities, and organic forms. But instead of simply reappropriating old forms, he channels the past by sublimating it, creating a style that, in the end, is sui generis. . . . “ (p. 316).

Carlin, however, emphasizes Ware’s Formalism. Animism has been left behind: Carlin maintains that Ware addresses his audience “in an ironic way that never lets us forget we are reading comics. We don’t get lost in the story the way we do in Spiegelman’s Maus or Crumb’s comics.” (p.158) I’d say that Ware achieves this Brechtian effect through his unusual methods of designing the page, leading the reader’s eye through the narrative by an unconventional route., forcing him to pay attention to the Formal aspects of the art.

Carlin asserts that “Ware’s comics express emotional content through form and design more than just story and dialogue” (p. 154). He quotes Ware as explaining that King’s “Gasoline Alley changed a lot of my thinking about comics. It made me realize that the mood of a comic strip did not need to come from the drawing or the words. . . .The emotion came from the way the story itself was structured” (p. 158). Referring to Ware’s character Jimmy Corrigan, Carlin helpfully observes that “Ware and Jimmy were both abandoned by their fathers when they were very young and then met them briefly in later life without resolving anything before their fathers died. The sadness behind this disconnect is played out as much in the way that the form of the story breaks down time into discrete elements as in the psychology of the characters” (p. 158)

But Carlin goes further and contends that “Ware uses form and design. . .to find new ways to tell stories and reveal human emotions that are appropriate to his generation. In other words, Ware’s abstractions, combinations of apparently ephemeral elements, and lapses in logical continuity are all part of how people now experience the world around them.” I don’t: I’m a believer in logic and tradition, and Ware seems not only to value tradition (as in his respect for King’s work) but also to prize order and structure, perhaps more than any of the other Masters. Eggers writes that “Ware’s work is the most elaborate and the most controlled example of the comics medium yet produced. . . “ (p. 312). As a Classicist I look for constants in the realm of literature and art: qualities which enable classic works to remain vital and relevant through time. The “Masters” show demonstrates that we can relate to the works and ideas of writer/artists from forty, fifty, or even a hundred years ago. I have my doubts that the Younger Generation is this mysterious mutant race that sees life entirely differently than their forebears, or that, even with the omnipresence of mass media that Carlin cites, that life has somehow radically changed in its essentials. Ware may have a new and unusual perspective on the world, but that doesn’t mean that everyone of his generation thinks the way he does. Just look at the rest of contemporary mass culture.

Kimmelman writes that Ware has “a singular, melancholy vision.” Referring to King’s influence on Ware in his Rusty Brown strip, Carlin writes that “Ware brings out the sadness and emptiness of contemporary experience in a way that never came to the surface in King’s work” (p. 162). Here too I disagree. Why is “contemporary experience” characterized by “sadness and emptiness”? Most of King’s strips in the show date from the 1930s, the period of the Great Depression, when the world was moving towards war. That seems to me to be a sadder and emptier time for America than the early 21st century. There are always people who lead sad and empty lives, and always people who lead happy and fulfilling ones. My problem in relating to Ware’s work is that it seems mired in depression and despair. As Carlin says, Ware borrows formal devices from King’s work, but not King’s humor or optimism. Carlin points out that Jimmy Corrigan seems modeled on Charlie Brown, but that Schulz’s character is “caught between wonder and worry” (p. 158). Jimmy is left only with the worry, but that leaves out the other half of life.

Eggers observes about Ware that “no amount of success or acclaim seems to diminish the self-flagellating with which he punishes himself” (p. 315). One of Ware’s pieces at the Jewish Museum ironically advised readers how to “Ruin Your Life: Draw Cartoons,” thereby dooming yourself to “decades of grinding isolation.” In this piece Ware broke the cartoonist’s career into four steps: “1. Get to work. 2. Realize Your Mistake. 3. Envy the Other Arts. 4. You Will Not Be Compensated.” Looking this over, I thought to myself: this guy’s work is hanging in a museum. Just how bad can his career be?

In the Timesonline slideshow, Ware is represented by “Superman Suicide,” two panels from Jimmy Corrigan, the Smartest Kid on Earth (2002) in which a man costumed as a superhero, rather than flying, falls between two panels to his death on the street (p. 162). In two later panels (not in the slide show but on p. 163), Jimmy looks, perhaps disconsolately, at the spot on the street where the corpse had lain. Carlin calls the superhero in Corrigan a “signifier of lost illusions” (p. 162). The costumed man’s death is an iconic image of defeat, of humankind’s failure to rise above the “sadness and emptiness” of the world.

But you may recall that a superhero falling from a great height to his death on a street below is how Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons started Watchmen, and then they went on from there, to depict a world in which disillusion and despair coexist with spiritual renewal and even the miraculous. Theirs is a more complex and rounded vision of “contemporary existence” than Ware’s.

If you read the Masters of American Art book, don’t skip over the footnotes section. Both there and in the main text, Carlin discusses many cartoonists besides the fifteen Masters, including Alex Raymond, Carl Barks, Walt Kelly, Al Capp, Carmine Infantino, Steve Ditko, Daniel Clowes, Frank Miller, and more. It’s as if they were receiving honorary mentions. According to the “Masters” panel at the San Diego Con, Art Spiegelman has already suggested doing “Masters of American Comics II.” I hope that they will, and feature other important comics artists. Or perhaps the “Masters” show will inspire other museums to organize exhibits honoring other comics artists. With luck, this is only the beginning of comics in American museums.

ADVERTISEMENTS FOR MYSELF
If you want to read more about Scott McCloud’s talk at NYU, you can read my online report for the
Nov. 28, 2006 edition of Publishers Weekly’s Comics Week. For the Nov. 14 Comics Week, I wrote about the Jewish Museum’s panel on the Golden Age of Comics, featuring Golden Age cartoonists Jules Feiffer, Irwin Hasen, and Jerry Robinson.

I’ve written another, entirely different article about the late Mark Gruenwald in Michael Eury’s Back Issue #19, now on sale from TwoMorrows Publishing.

My first lecture on Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons’ Watchmen for “1986: The Year That Changed Comics” at the Museum of Comic and Cartoon Art in New York City was the best attended of the series. (You can read about it here) I will conclude my analysis of Watchmen with another lecture at MoCCA on Monday, December 4 at 6:30 PM.

-Copyright 2006 Peter Sanderson

Trailer Park: Nerds! Nerds! Nerds!

Filed under: Columns,Trailer Park — admin @ 2:11 am

By Christopher Stipp

Archives? Right Here…

Timely couldn’t be a better word to describe the events of these past couple of weeks.

First of all, 10 Quick Questions. What started out as being this big goof on the wall of silence that was erected around anyone who communicates by the written word has stared to take on a life all on its own. Corri English was nice enough to be, ostensibly, our first victim to see how an interview would work if it would be done in a style much like Entertainment Weekly’s Stupid Questions but with a little more weight. The people and things you’re going to see in the coming weeks will have a lot to with television, movie spokespersons, The Amazing Race, charitable organizations and the fashion industry. I promise, it will all make sense soon. I know it may take me away from trailer reviewing every once in a while but please, people, understand that I love you just as much as I do my fresh stack of comic books that I get every Friday afternoon so fear not. This column will be just as low-profile and non-noteworthy as ever but Stipp just needs to spread his wings a touch, ya dig? Thanks for understanding.

Secondly, I was in Tucson over the weekend. Now, some of you know that I don’t care that much for organized sports, Chicago Cubs excluded as that’s something that exists in my DNA for being 1) born in Illinois and 2) having a predilection for consistently being last in everything.

Now, I was part of a 4-person trek for a 2-hour drive southward to Tucson in order to be witness for the traditional post-Thanksgiving match-up of ASU and UofA. I could go on and on about rivalries but this one’s pretty deep around these parts, I could honestly give a fuck, and it’s all about football and heavy drinking. I was in for the latter, really, but there was something else I was on the hunt for that I heard existed. I don’t get much opportunity to come close to Hollywood history living in this state that seems to be more occupied with building 20 story fencing across our southern border with Mexico than it is with being concerned for those living within it but I heard about a house that exists in Tucson, Arizona that was of great interest to me.

It was the Alpha Beta house.

Yes, the REVENGE OF THE NERDS production used the University of Arizona campus for its exteriors in 1984 and one of the people I was heading down to Tucson with mentioned that he could take me to the house. He swore that the fraternity that currently has possession of the home have decided to treat it like an undergraduate co-ed who has pounded one too many Pabst Blue Ribbons on a Friday night and has mentioned to her Cro-Magnon date that she’s feeling randy.

I didn’t think it could have been all that bad. I mean, if the school is allowing them to be on the campus isn’t there a HOA that establishes how well the property needs to be maintained?

No, there’s not.

On Sunday morning, after reeling from the many beers I chugged with the young’uns of the school’s student body, trying to convince myself that I can still roll with those who weren’t born until 1988, I can’t, I sauntered over to the house that stood to mean so much misery to Louis and Gilbert as they pulled a heavy trunk across the school grounds. After asking my guide twice if he was sure this was the right house, I had little idea of what the house REALLY looked like pre-Fireball in the movie, I stood on the sidewalk in front of the place that has been a watershed for so many of my comedic moments growing up as a young man. It depressed me to see the home was in a sad state of disrepair. The paint was splotchy, the landscape was just a slap-dash of grass that looked like it was on the verge of death, bushes that don’t look like they’ve been trimmed with anything more than a cigarette lighter by various drunken frat boys “for a laugh” and an overall aesthetic that this was a place where all should abandon hope ye who enter there.

I took a picture of it and briefly pondered what this really meant to have such a cultural touchstone like the AB fraternity house just disrespected. It should be more than just a place where male students start their journey of pillaging and conniving with their other guy friends, thinly disguising their homosexuality by participating in acts like paddle spanking and elephant walking. I don’t know if I was just being sensitive, overly sensitive, because REVENGE OF THE NERDS was that first comedy which spoke to me on a level that went beyond naked chicks and Dudley Dawson. Shouldn’t there be more awareness of places that should at least be paid some sort of attention and care if for no other reason than to preserve a moment that has meant a lot to so many?

I would have to say no. There really is no reason why the house should be any better maintained than any other fraternity house. It makes me sad, true, to see it but I can’t complain. I almost take some kind of delight in the recent news last week that the entire production of the new REVENGE OF THE NERDS has been indefinately shelved for the time being.

I know there were some cackles raised in opposition for the newest incarnation of this film but where the hell were you all for Revenge of the Nerds III: The Next Generation or even the God awful, the truly heinous, Revenge of the Nerds IV: Nerds in Love? There couldn’t have been a better reason out there for the complete annihilation for this franchise than these two TV movies. What started out as a comedy that really gave us male Gen Xers a movie that we will all be proud of having seen with our dumb little buddies on any given Friday or Saturday night sleepover (Do kids still do these things or have they somehow been outlawed in this age of uncertainty?) and exposed most of us to our first true taste of…exposure of the female variety? I know I can be counted in that vote.

There are just some films that mean more than just the stock they’re on. REVENGE OF THE NERDS has that kind of resonance that hasn’t ever diminished, in my estimation. Seeing the house that essentially just offered the real exterior for a faux college story on some backlot where the players themselves were well beyond the freshman felt invigorating in a way. I enjoyed the fanboy-ness of it all and it sure made me think of sliding that movie in again, delighting in the immutable truth that I have never used the word “bush” and not thought of Curtis Armstrong every damn time.

Sometimes great movies can transcend our own lives in their own way, be it the ones that win awards or the ones that just mean more than any prize given to it.

UNKNOWN (2006)

Director: Simon Brand
Cast:
Jim Caviezel, Greg Kinnear, Joe Pantoliano, Barry Pepper, Jeremy Sistoe
Release: Now Playing
Synopsis:
Five men wake up in a locked-down warehouse, none of them able to remember how they got there or even who they are. They soon realize that they were all part of a kidnapping – without having the slightest idea of which side they were on.

View Trailer:
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Prognosis: Negative; Maybe I’ll Leave It On If It Happens To Make It On TNT Some Night. Stop me if you’ve heard this one: Jesus wakes up in a warehouse without knowing who he is.

I think I included this trailer if for no other reason than the premise seems completely absurd. I honestly had visions, not unlike having a peyote clambake inside a walk-in closet, of some guy, two guys because it would be funnier that way, explaining the idea for this movie to some guy in a $5,000 suit who is thinking about either having an endive salad with his sea bass or a romaine leaf that’s covered in mango pieces. These two monkeys would have their shirt sleeves pulled back over their elbows as they spooge their brilliant concept of this completely made-up premise only to have the suit break out his checkbook by the end of it all.

I mean, really, would you buy a film based on the idea that any high school freshman could come up with for his creative writing class? I believe most of you would but that’s beside the point.

What’s really remarkable here is that there isn’t anything to remark on when we open up on things. We have a wide shot of a building that seems to be in the middle of such a wretched industrial park that only rape and felonies seem like the only legitimate business practice.

Next, somewhere far off, a phone rings. We travel down the corridors of this lonely building, the hum of fluorescent lighting the only real spooky thing about this place, as Jesus wakes up from his nap time.

Hey-Soose doesn’t know who he is, where he is, what is going on or who he’s talking to on the phone but the dude on the other line gives us the great SAW-esque set-up that our Lord and Savior should a) not kill anyone b) look after the hostages c) sit tight and d) realize that since this movie is only a couple hours long he’s going to have to MacGyver his ass out of there tout de suite. But, oh noes!, he doesn’t know anything about anything so what’s the Son of God to do?

Turn to Barry Pepper, that’s what.

“And that makes some of us hostages and some of us kidnappers”¦”

HomeSchool Barry breaks it all down for us like we’re drooling Neanderthals who need to have things explained to other people in the film while not addressing the audience directly; I mean, really, all that’s missing here is a wink to all of us in attendance that he did us a solid by explaining the plot. Thanks, Barry.

Of course from here it’s all about the red herrings and the finger-pointing. I realize that some people dig trying to figure out what’s happening because they took Murder, She Wrote off the air some years ago and you’re jonsin’ for some good old-fashioned mystery but I guess as a one-off you could do a lot worse than this.

Besides, the last ¼ of this trailer is just chock filled with accusatory “It’s you!” and “You’re the one!” When things devolve into being something that we’ve all seen before, without anything new to say within the parameters of the trailer, I just can’t help but shrug and move on to something fresh.

8 FILMS TO DIE FOR (2006)

Director: Various
Cast: Various
Release: November 17, 2006
Synopsis: A revolutionary, nationwide theatrical release of eight films that are deemed too controversial, too graphic by the mainstream studios. HORROR FEST is an all-weekend horror event featuring celebrity appearances, signings, giveaways, and other special events.

View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)

Prognosis: Positive. Who was lucky enough to catch any of these films last weekend and was it worth the effort to see any of them?

Now:

A) Those with epilepsy should not see this trailer; you’ve got enough flashing and blinking lights that could induce a few seizures that could rival Super Mario Bros.’ numbers.

B) This trailer not only forgoes trying to sell this movie on its merit of filmmaking but, yet, pushes the “controversial” angle on us like it’s a badge of honor.

C) This looks like one of the greatest entries into the horror genre since ON GOLDEN POND. Seriously, can anyone here they aren’t still haunted by Henry Fonda’s request to “suck face” with Katharine Hepburn? (Shudder)

I honestly do have to give it up for this trailer for its complete packaging. I think that if I were the one responsible for this movie trailer I wouldn’t want to give short shrift to the varied voices contained in this flick, regardless of the label of “too controversial to be shown in theaters,” but I get that maybe a coalescing of voices in order to do the greatest good is what is in order.

Don LaFontaine just comes right out of the gate with his throaty voiceover as he really plays up the idea that these movies on their own were just too much to be played nationwide at the local AMC but it’s the visuals that are of interesting note. You’ve first got a scared looking girl with a shaking flashlight, a close-up of a face that has a single bead of sweat running down it and then, even after you see a grotesque doll morph into something more hideous, we get a lady in her bra. And this what brings up an excellent topic in modern horror storytelling: the people behind a lot of genre fiction love tormenting women. There is some paper, some thesis, that I know could be made regarding the use of women and their effectiveness in amping up an already tense situation but we’re not left to linger very long on this notion.

It’s the zombie sitting in the bed with the long salt and pepper hair on bloodied sheets that gets me. It’s fantastic. As is the image of a person, or something, that’s on a medical examiners’ steely slab underneath a very dirty sheet; you’ve really got to employ some pausing and rewinding to see it but it’s well worth the effort just try and make out whether it’s human in origin.

How else to explain the Nosferatu looking creature that places its hand on his female victims’ breast than to say that even though there is no context given there really isn’t any needed as the females keep doing a man’s job better by screaming, shaking and, at one point, reaching out for help.

The minimalist scoring of this trailer only segments its appeal to those who would best be served by this movie’s offerings. Discordant images in the middle of this trailer only help to establish the wretched settings, and reveals, that these movies are going to have. I am especially taken by the image that’s nearly dead center in this trailer’s length of a woman (surprise) who wields an ax above her head, her face all sorts of fucked up, in a flickering room.

Even though I find myself pausing for a moment after seeing a lady (what is it with this device) having a coffin door slamming on top of her in fresh grave as she cries out I can’t help but quickly looking about when I can see this movie for myself.

I don’t know where movies like THE TWILIGHT ZONE: THE MOVIE or CREEPSHOW went in the 80’s but I am delighted, over the moon, that horror still beats alive and well. This movie looks like it wants to be the kind of film that’s best enjoyed at night, a kind of function that’s been lost for a while. Disregard all that crap at the end of this trailer about this studio being the only one to have the balls to show these movies. This just looks like a good time, regardless of the hype behind it.

SMOKIN’ ACES (2006)

Director: Joe Carnahan
Cast:
Ben Affleck, Andy Garcia, Ryan Reynolds, Alicia Keys, David Proval, Chris Pine, Kevin Durand
Release: January 26, 2007
Synopsis: An incendiary array of stars – including Ben Affleck, Andy Garcia, Ray Liotta, Jeremy Piven, Ryan Reynolds, Peter Berg, Martin Henderson, Taraji Henson and, in their motion-picture debuts, Alicia Keys and Common – star in SMOKIN’ ACES, the new dark action comedy from Joe Carnahan, the acclaimed director of NARC. In these interlocking tales of high stakes and low lifes, Mob boss Primo Sparazza has taken out a hefty contract on Buddy “Aces” Israel (Piven) – a sleazy magician who has agreed to turn state’s evidence against the Vegas mob. The FBI, sensing a chance to use this small-time con to bring down big-target Sparazza, places Aces into protective custody-under the supervision of two agents (Reynolds and Liotta) dispatched to Aces’ Lake Tahoe hideout.

When word of the price on Aces’ head spreads into the community of ex-cons and cons-to-be, it entices bounty hunters, thugs-for-hire, smokin’ hot vixens and double-crossing mobsters to join in the hunt. With all eyes on Tahoe, this togues’ gallery collides in a comic race to hit the jackpot and rub out Aces.

View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)

Prognosis: On My Top 10 For 2006. I have a new girlfriend and this trailer is it.

It’s hard to be passionate about big, bloated budgets and star-studded productions but I’ll be goddamned if this preview isn’t the hottest thing to surface in recent months.

Now, to me, I enjoy answering other people’s questions about what music is playing a trailer; I remember growing up that one of the more frustrating parts of evolving as a young man, besides the sudden appearance of body hair below my natural equator, was to hear a tune on the radio and not know who sang it. The real mark, then, of laying down the competition with real force with regard to making people ignore the white noise emanating from other trailers is realizing that Cut N’ Pasting late 80’s hits isn’t acceptable and that ripping your ears off with a pimp track from DJ Shadow is just good business when trying to get your audience’s buy-in. I’d recommend you tune-in and turn it up.

At first, though, you don’t really what to make of the story. There’s no voiceover, there’s no flashes of the high-powered actors who are in the movie to get your attention and there are no conventional set-ups to be found; there is only the presentation of a moment to set things in motion. And it works well.

We get Jason Bateman, Peter Berg, Martin Henderson and Ben Affleck in a room; no, this isn’t the beginning of some ribald joke involving K-Y and a monkey but expediency is the order of business and everyone uses their time well in establishing all we need to know about this film.

Bateman looks disheveled and while I don’t really find myself getting lost in whatever character he’s trying to inhabit I find his delivery delightful. We get the set-up and the reason why we are going to pay to see this flick: Jeremy “Poke My Person With An Emmy” Piven is going to testify against the mob and a whole lotta people want him dead. The idea, let’s face it, isn’t so original but Joe Carnahan’s style here rises above those who have come before, stealing a little bit of something from the Guy Ritchie playbook and the McG School of Flash Over Substance, straps you down on the examination table and goes to town on your synapses with the quick cutting.

We get additional information that there’s a $1 million price tag on Piven’s head and, of course, naturally, there are all sorts of seedy elements out to get their fingers on the prize money. What’s also making this movie even more popcorn-y and is going to get me to the multiplex is that we get a slew of “characters” who are so over-the-top and outrageously out of the norm that I can feel the pulsing of wanton violence bumping like bass lines right underneath the veneer of things.

Seeing Ben Affleck put out onto the pavement in an all too brief moment, his aggressor rocking a dirty wife-beater and couldn’t be more obnoxious looking even if put into Brett Ratner’s hands, I am reminded that while this may have given away too much there is the very palptable sense that everyone could be expendable; that would be a very nice thing, indeed, to realize and again would validate my suspicion that Carnahan has created something original out of the simple kill-the-informant plot line.

It’s about a third of the way in when the real style of the trailer’s creativity comes into bloom and bleeds all over the screen. Ryan Reynolds, sporting the same scruffy/patchy facial hair that made his part in BLADE 3 oh so memorable, carries the tension of the moment when you can feel that we’re about to launch into hyperspace.

Ah, but not yet.

A jaunty Muzak song plays as we’re treated to a real close up of a guy, who the hell knows who he is, quietly taking a black marker to his face, creating a Hitler “˜stache which I am thinking is not an ironic statement. It’s very out of the norm but it’s all sorts of great.

BOOM.

Thrust back into the action, and I mean action with a capital A, the whole world is shredded around your eyes. More freaks than a circus, more guns than at an army supply depot and enough shattered glass to make DIE HARD look like a prissy warm-up, there is one moment I hope you turn your speakers up to listen to.

As soon as you hear Ben Affleck say “These guys will go megaton” just feel the bass and listen to the way the sound dances around the field as bullets on the screen whiz in every which direction just before some wiggidy-wack white boy with a vision problem and in need of serious dental work pops in with his own bon mot. It’s gonzo, nuts and complete chaos all wrapped in a tasty package.

Seriously, kids, this is one of the most intense action trailers this year. It’s perfection of mindless action at its greatest.

QSE News: 12/1/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 2:09 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgBird’s of a feather flock together and so do… Hollywood racists.  Mel Gibson is throwing his support behind Michael Richards, the beleaguered “comedian” whose racially charged tirade at a comedy club recently all but ended his “career.”  When asked why he was supporting Richards, Gibson responded “Well, you know… since I found out he’s not really Jewish, I figured he was probably a pretty OK guy.”
  • In a case of life imitating art, the girl who plays Mary in the new the Nativity movie is pregnant. The 16-year-old actress, Keisha Castle-Hughes, is “pretty sure” she’s not carrying the son of God and that this is not a case of “immaculate conception”… unless, of course, “immaculate conception” means a night of rough, drunken sex in the back of a Camaro with her “boyfriend” Lloyd.  However, the actress has publicly stated that she IS planning on delivering the child in a barn somewhere in Iraq.
  • In television news, CBS has announced plans for a new reality show called Armed and Famous, where minor celebrities go through police training.  Featuring such F-List actors as Eric Estrada, LaToya Jackson and Jack Osborn as “the drug-sniffing” dog, the “celebrities” will eventually go on actual patrols and wield “real” guns.  CBS has already announced plans for a follow up series called How Ponch Got Capped In The Head During a Botched Drug Raid.
  • Hoping to lure and trick young people into the cut-throat world of Canadian politics, former Canadian Prime Ministers are appearing as judges in a new reality TV show called The Next Great Prime Minister.  And, of course, I’m sure I’m echoing most of Americas sentiments when I say, “Canadians have television??”
  • And finally, on a sad note, popular children’s group The Wiggles are losing their lead singer, the “Yellow Wiggle,” to an undisclosed illness.  According to the remaining members of the band, the short list for a replacement includes only one name:  Justin Hawkins, ex-lead singer of the band The Darkness.  When the Wiggles were asked “Why Hawkins?,” “Blue Wiggle” responded, “Are you [EXPLETIVE DELETED] kidding me?  Justin has a $2000 a week coke habit!  Hell, he’ll fit right in.  Oh yeah, and the [EXPLETIVE DELETED] kids are going to [EXPLETIVE DELETED] love him!!”
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That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by M. Bell)

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Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 12/1/2006

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:59 am
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The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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  • Who needs Wii when you can get Blip for Christmas… (Thingamabob)

Have a THINGAMABOB? Send it in!

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November 30, 2006

Quick Stop Thingamabobs: 11/30/2006

Filed under: Columns,Thingamabobs — UncaScroogeMcD @ 2:15 am
thingamabobs.jpg

The web. It’s a big place, full of plenty of distractions ““ some funny, some informative, some ludicrous, some disturbing, some inane, some profound. Each and every weekday, we present links to a few of our favorite finds”¦

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  • Ach! I forgot to highlight the latest Kaspar Hauser comedy podcast, wherein Captain Kirk takes some bad acid… (Thingamabob)
  • The entirety of Friends, in 90 seconds… (Thingamabob)

Have a THINGAMABOB? Send it in!

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QSE News: 11/30/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:58 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgNot wanting to be out-done by his peers, Snoop Dogg was arrested Tuesday on suspicion of possessing a hand-gun and drugs. Police said they became suspicious when they realized the person they were following was Snoop Dogg. This brings Snoop Dogg’s total number of times arrested to 1,122, just 24 times shy of Charlie Sheen.
  • TV anchorman Matt Lauer and his wife Annette welcomed their third child into the world on Wednesday. While the baby, named Thijs, was pronounced healthy upon birth, Matt Lauer’s reaction was said to be surprisingly glib. When asked for comment, the Today show anchor said, “Well. . .at least THIS time it’s white.”
  • And in other news, it appears that not everyone in Kazakhstan hates Borat. A leading Kazakh author, Sapabek Asip-uly, has nominated the comedian behind the character, Sacha Baron Cohen, for a national award.  When asked for comment, Borat said:  “That’s niiiice!  I like sexy time with Sapabek for he give koo-koo good hand relief!  High five!”
  • Executives at Marvel comics are demanding that famed X-Men illustrator, Dave Cockrum, be buried upside down in an un-marked grave after it was discovered that he passed away while wearing Superman pajamas and clutching a Batman blanket.
  • Finally, in today’s obligatory Paris Hilton news – apparently the party is over for newly reconciled friends Hilton and Lindsay Lohan.  Lohan, who in the past has been referred to by Hilton as “Firecrotch,” was seen leaving a fancy-schmancy L.A. nightclub in tears after Hilton reportedly called Lohan a “[expletive] coked-out whore….”  Witnesses were quick to come to Lohan’s defense, saying that the “actress” may be a coked-out whore but Lohan is certainly not [expletive]… or at least not on the night in question.

That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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November 29, 2006

QSE News: 11/29/2006

Filed under: Columns,News — UncaScroogeMcD @ 1:03 am
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Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

  • qsnews.jpgIn a surprising turn of events, the once-peaceful nation of Sweden has declared war on heterosexuality by announcing their plans to open the first ever ABBA museum. When questioned as to “why,” an un-named official responded that “Drag-queens need a ‘Mecca,’ too, and Liza Minnelli isn’t from here.”
  • Things were looking up for nu-metal schlocksters, Linkin Park, late Tuesday after the band mistakenly thought they had re-established contact with their last remaining a fan. As it turns out, the “woman,” from Albuquerque, NM, was merely hacking into singer Chester Bennington’s phone for the purpose of leaving text messages regarding how much the “band sucked.” Bennington could not be reached for comment. Apparently, his shift at Wendy’s just ended and he’s off until Thursday.
  • Owners of The Laugh Factory in Los Angeles are reportedly demanding that Michael Richards pay $1 million for every racial slur that he recently used during a tirade at the club. Advisors are suggesting that Richards off set this amount by suing Nabisco for their liberal use of the word “cracker.”
  • Eat your heart out, Sharon Stone! After kicking K-Fed to the curb, Britney Spears has decided to let the “cat out of the bag”… so to speak. Showing up to a trendy LA hot-spot with new “girl friend” Paris Hilton in tow, Britney surprised the waiting paparazzi with a full-frontal shot of her “money maker.”

That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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