Tag: joe corey

Party Favors: Walk Like A Man

DES MOINES – During the 20th Century when a young boy or girl wanted to know how to be an adult, they’d learn from the movies. This education was not from merely emulating the stars in Hollywood films. There were thousands of movies made for the classrooms that covered nearly every subject a young mind needed to absorb. And thousands of those 16mm films found their way into Skip Elsheimer’s A/V Geeks educational film center.

Skip tours the country giving presentations of the films in various theaters, museums, art galleries and occasionally a classroom. He’s sharing another batch of gems in two new DVD sets from Kino. How to Be a Woman and How to Be a Man are instructional, inspirational and horrific. Strange to see what professionals thought was great advice. Here’s a little sampler from How to Be a Woman:

Here’s an overview of How to be a Man:

The footage of Skip at the AV Geeks archive was shot by me. It must also be revealed that Skip once lived in my closet. It was a really big closet. This was supposed to be an interview with Skip, but he had to go under the knife for surgery. We wish him a speedy recovery. Ironically he’s scheduled to screen various medical films at the Moore College of Art & Design in Philadelphia on January 23. Are you ready to see “Cell Wars” in the land of Parking Wars?

The two sets received a major plug on CBS’s Sunday Morning that led to sell outs at Amazon. Both DVDs are back in stock. If you want to find out what various health films Skip has in the collection or tour dates, visit www.avgeeks.com.

UNDERCOVER BLAHS

Is CBS serious about airing Undercover Boss after the Super Bowl? The show looks about as interesting as watching a marathon of corporate inspirational videos. As if any of these bosses are going to show themselves as dispassionate boobs who spend more time on the phone with their brokers finding out when they can dump their stock options.

I Get That a Lot is a Candid Camera segment that’s flatlined. As if anyone isn’t going to guess Gene Simmons or Paris Hilton is really working a minimum wage jog. What would be more interesting is getting Hollywood’s hard working supporting actors who appear in every film, but you don’t know their names. Where’s Jane Lynch, Stephen Tobolowsky or Glenn Plummer? Actors who people will wonder if they saw them in films or their college yearbook. That is comedy.

The show I’m looking forward to is Fox’s Baptism of the Stars Thrill to the sight of Hollywood Heathens getting wet for Jesus. It’s going to be their big Easter special.

EXTREME LEFTOVERS

Can you imagine how bad it would be in the ’70s if you were at a party with James Caan, Warren Beatty and Wilt Chamberlain? What are the odds of you getting close to a woman’s phone number let alone her hotel room keys? If you saw their cars parked outside a nightclub, go home. You’d have better odds scoring at a convent. This trio slept with enough women to fill a World Cup stadium.

Rumors now swirl that Rip Torn once had a threesome with Mrs. Butterworth and Aunt Jemima.

DA PLANE

For all the Retro TV action that’s taking place as either digital sub channels or on regular broadcast in certain places like Chicago, there’s a piece of programming missing. Does any channel in America have a Saturday night line up that includes The Love Boat and Fantasy Island? If you want to create a nostalgia night, why not give us Captain Stubbing and Mr. Rourke with a cast of 100s of stars as their guests? These were the ABC crown jewels with Ernie Anderson’s iconic voice warning us that if you didn’t have a social life, you could take a staycation with a cheap cruise and a tourist trap.

For those of you who want to semi-recreate the night, you can get the first season of Fantasy Island and the first two seasons of The Love Boat on DVD. But it’d be sweeter if a plucky programming could reunite these cheesterpieces of the ’70s and ’80s on the night they mattered.

REVISIT THIS BAND

As part of desire to plan ahead, my new year’s resolution for 2011 is to make the J. Geils Band cool once more. And I’m not talking about the “Freeze Frame” and “Centerfold” era band that dominated MTV for a couple weeks. I’m talking about the band that wailed on “Whammer Jammer.” Peter Wolf is the type of vocal dynamo you don’t get anymore. He’s not merely singing. He’s calling in urgent air strikes on his baby’s heart. This is the type of music that shouldn’t be listened to in a smoke-free bar. Dig up the live stuff to get that shot of distilled mayhem.

MORE FOOD

Why do all these competition cooking shows send their chefs to Whole Foods with a $100 to buy all their groceries? Imagine how much more food they could buy a normal supermarket or even a farmer’s market with the same amount of cash. You can’t get a decent chicken thigh for less than $10 there.

BLACK BELT FESTIVAL

Jim Kelly is finally getting his due with Urban Action Collection. Three of his better films are on this low budget set with Black Belt Jones, Three the Hard Way and Hot Potato. You should know Kelly from his ass kicking turn in Enter the Dragon where he held his own with Bruce Lee and John Saxon. This trio contains more of his inner city karate skills. Three the Hard Way is a classic with Kelly teaming up with Jim Brown and Fred Williamson. The fourth film is Black Samson. I recently caught the trailer and it’s just strange. Rockne Tarkington roams the ghetto with a giant club and a full grown lion. Here’s a strange piece of trivia: Rockne was the only black actor to speak on The Andy Griffith Show. If you have a little left on your gift cards, enjoy those Badass Cinema classics of the ’70s if you have a little left on your gift cards. You might want to also pick up a bottle of Colt 45 Malt Liquor to properly appreciate the thespian greatness of Kelly and Tarkington.

It’s a perfect appetizer while waiting for Black Dynamite.

WORLD’S WORST DAD

DVD SHELF

Mel Brooks’ Spaceballs: The Totally Warped Animated Adventures attempts to revive the 22 year old Star Wars spoof as an Adult Swim-esque cartoon. They were smart enough to get Mel Brooks, Joan Rivers and Daphne Zuniga to voice their characters. Unfortunately RIck Moranis isn’t Darth Helmet. Instead were given Dee Bradley Baker with a rather forgettable tone. While they supposedly made 13 episodes, only 4 are included on the DVD. Fans of the movie will get a laugh or two from the continuing spoofs of science fiction films. However the series doesn’t go beyond the humor of the movie. Mel Brooks supposedly over saw the cartoons, but it seems he’s more concerned about Broadway adaptations of his old movies. There’s just little things missing from Spaceballs that makes it a pale impersonation of the original film instead of taking the characters to an animated galaxy.

The Marine 2 stars Ted DiBiase Jr. instead of John Cena as the elite marine who bumps into trouble on his vacation. This time the WWE wrestler gets taken to a Thailand resort with his woman for the grand opening. Turns out a few of the locals aren’t liking the place. They attack the resort and take the VIP guests hostage. It’s up to DiBiase to take kick a little ass to get back his woman and lay down the international law. The biggest star in the film is Michael Rooker (Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer). He’s not even the villain which is good for DiBiase. Rooker is out of his league when given an evil role. DiBiase does play it a little more convincing than Cena in this sequel. It does help that the action is focused around the resort. The takeover scene is plays well with numerous explosions and an attack force wearing tribal masks while unloading automatic weapons. The bonus features include extended and deleted scenes with Muay Thai Fighting. Crack open a beer and enjoy the beatdowns courtesy of the son of the Million Dollar Man. You can also get it in Blu-ray to see a more vivid tropical terror.

Make It Or Break It: Volume One, Extended Edition takes us inside the highly competitive world of female gymnastics. The pressure is on for these girls who have only a few years to achieve Olympic glory. The 10 episodes on the boxset introduce us to the hopefuls at the Rocky Mountain Gym. They call it “The Rock.” There’s a lot of politics to go along with the floor routines. A new Russian coach arrives with visions of making it big for his little trainees. This show is properly aimed at kids who like to watch gymnastics, but fear being flung through the air and tearing apart their knees. It allows people to realize there’s tons of hardwork and backstabbing before you can get on the balance beam.

10 Things I Hate About You: Volume One adapts the teenage cinematic adaptation of Shakespeare’s Taming of the Shrew into a weekly series. Larry Miller returns in the role of Dr. Walter Stratford, but nobody else from the film steps down to the small screen. There’s a new Kat (Lindsey Shaw) and Bianca (Meaghan Jette Martin) giving strife to Patrick (Ethan Peck) and Cameron (Nicholas Braun). The series is aimed for the kids who think high school is the key to romance. Each week Bianca attempts to become part of the popular kids at school. This is followed up with another reason why Kat has to turn everything complicated. The show is a single camera 30 minute sitcom so things don’t get bogged down too long. This is a sitcom for the tween that wants more from the Heath Ledger movie.

The Boys Are Back is Clive Owen (Children of Men) in a bit a weeper. He’s a sportswriter who loses his wife to cancer. He now has to deal with raising their young son and his teenage son from an earlier marriage. He’s got to find time between his work to care for the boys. It’s bit of a male version of a Lifetime film. Scott Hicks who directed Shine gives the tale an arthouse polish that elevates the material above a made for TV movie. If they remade this in America, Clive Owen would be begging for a slot on ESPN’s Around the Horn. It is refreshing to see a dad-centric film. Owen’s face shows the burden of his new life as single dad.

Surrogates is about people who control androids so they no longer have to leave their houses. It’s kinda like Avatar without blue people, Roger Dean album cover landscapes and that pesky anti-American message brought to you by News Corp. Bruce Willis is the last human willing to roam society. He’s an FBI agent investigating the murder of a student linked to the creator of the robo-clones. Action director Jonathan Mostow and his crew keep the action tight and barely over 80 minutes. The film represents the rebirth of Jack Noseworthy. It’s a good entry for your Bruce Willis Buttkicking Marathon 2010. Bonus features include a commentary track from Mostow.

I Heart Jonas brings together seven episodes of the series as a Valentine’s Day gift. Although this year, there will only be hearting done to Joe and Nick Jonas since Kevin is now married. The show does its hardest to make the three brothers act like the Monkees of the 21st century. The slow paced editing cuts down on the chaos and insanity that made the Monkees an iconic musical comedy. Also doesn’t help that the brothers aren’t secretly rebelling against their cute pop star image. They seem content being pure pop for a teen audience. They won’t be sneaking Frank Zappa onto the set. The highlight of this batch is “You’ve Just Been Jo Bro’d” with American Idol winner Jordin Sparks. Remember when she defended their promise rings against the foul mouth Russell Brand.

thirtysomething: The Complete Second Season brings us the rise of Miles! Is he the savior to Michael and Elliot or their doom? This was a strike shortened season so there’s only 17 episodes. My favorite part is all that cutting edge ’80s technology and shoulder pads. Here’s a teaser for the show.

The Keeper takes Steven Seagal out of his reality show and punches him back into the world of cinematic whoopass. He’s an ex-cop that was screwed over by his devious partner. He grabs a gig as a bodyguard to a rich guy’s daughter. However his bad luck streak continues when the gal gets kidnapped by mobsters. Seagal refuses to take a third strike on his record. He must track her down and bring the pain on those that would sully his reputation. It’s a modest production on scale with a Walker, Texas Ranger. Although they overload the explosives in Seagal’s gaze. There’s no bonus features. I wanted my Seagal audio commentary, but I guess he wants to keep the secrets of his industrial strength hairdo. It’s big non-thinking action fun from the TV cop.

January 20, 2010
Party Favors: They Call Him Flipper

TACOMA – Who could imagine making a documentary about dolphins could lead to so much trouble. When director Louie Psihoyos exposed what the Japanese locals were doing to dolphins in Taiji, Japan in The Cove, he found himself a wanted man. This sea-side community celebrates their relationship with the dolphin. But there’s a darkside when they herd dolphins into a cove, sell the prized ones to aquariums for $150,000 each. The remaining dolphins are slaughtered and given to school kids as whale meat. He found himself wanted by the Japanese law for various charges including videotaping undercover police officers.

Certain folks have defended this slaughter as cultural dining. How dare Americans protest what the Japanese eat. The falsely labeled dolphin meat has toxic levels of mercury. Remember that this is the same Japan that will shut off imports of American agriculture and livestock with the rumor of something being amiss. Yet they had no problem giving their children mercury poisoning.

The Cove isn’t merely a talking heads with archival footage documentary. Psihoyos is a cameraman for National Geographic and part of Oceanic Preservation Society. He joins other activists in a clandestine effort to film the hidden slaughter. The film is an espionage thriller with hidden cameras, stealth operations and undercover cops. There’s also a supporting role from Heroes‘ Hayden Panettiere. The film recently won best documentary from the National Board of Review and is on the Academy Award shortlist for nomination eligibility.

The Cove arrives on Blu-ray and DVD this December 8. Director Psihoyos called up the Party Favors hotline. Listen in as we discuss mercury poisoning, the impact the film has had on the dolphin slaughter and the Japanese legal system.

DOWNLOAD: (right click to save)
Party Favors: Joe Corey Chats with THE COVE’s Louie Psihoyos (MP3 format)

[audio:http://www.smodcast.net/partyfavors/party_favors-the_cove.mp3]

The Cove has already had an impact in popular culture with a South Park episode based on it.

HUMPDAY EVERYDAY

Always be careful when drinking with old college buddies because you never know what you’ll talk each other into doing to prove you’re not elderly sell outs. Such was the message of Humpday. The Sundance darling is one of my favorite comedies of the year. The Blu-ray and DVD have just been released. Stars Joshua Leonard and Mark Duplass called up the Party Favors hotline to discuss their buddy comedy.

Humpday got its start with a chance meeting in the land of Starbucks and drizzle.

“I met Lynn on the set of this movie called True Adolescents that I was acting in up in Seattle,” Duplass said. “She was doing stills. We knew of each other. We hit it off as filmmakers in what we believe in when in making movies: improvisation, naturalism and a strong plot. She said, ‘I want to build a movie around you.’ I said, Great, sounds like fun. She called me about a month later and said, ‘I have this idea for a movie about two straight guys who get obsessed with a porn film festival called Hump.’ It’s a real festival in Seattle. I immediately loved it. I said we should do it as two guys try to have sex with each other over the course of a weekend.”

While Duplass was the first actor involved in the project, Shelton had him lined up for the vagabond pal.

“She initially approached me about playing Andrew, the character that Josh plays. I had just played a similar character in a movie. Let me play the married guy. I’m married now so I know what its about. I’ll get a haircut and clean up. And at that point we brought Josh onboard.

“I had not worked with Josh. Lynn said, ‘I don’t know anybody that could play this role.’ My brother Jay had just met Josh at a film independent lab that Jay was mentoring. Josh was a big fan of my brother and I’s first feature, The Puffy Chair. We were huge fans of what he’d done in The Blair Witch Project. More importantly, I didn’t know him that well, but I knew enough to know that we had a very special dynamic. Josh and I became friends very quickly and got very close very quickly. I think it had something to do that we are both very headstrong, very type A and have a ton of respect for each other. I really love him. We also have a side to our personalities that in this life it works great for us. In another life, if we’d been born on different sides of a battlefield, we could tear each other’s faces off. It something about that special love-hate bond that made it right for the role.”

Leonard has a different memory of how he became part of the Humpday duo.

“I got tricked into it,” Leonard declared. “I was dear friends with Mark Duplass. I knew of Lynn, but didn’t necessarily know her work. I was in New York doing a play when I got an email from Mark, who I adore as my friend and think the world of as a filmmaker. He said, ‘You want to play my best friend in this movie?’ I said absolutely, man. I’d love to as long as we can work the schedule out. He sent me an email back saying, ‘Great. Remember that you’ve already committed to it. It’s a film about two straight guys who try to make a gay porn.’ To which I responded, ‘OK. I trust your taste, but please, as my friend, never let me commit to anything without asking what it’s about first.’”

Since the movie was improvised, the principles had to focus on the characters’ history.

“We worked with some backstory, Josh, Lynn and I had these little summits in the backroom of my house in L.A. We had one particular long weekend were we stayed up and talked about the history of the guys. What we quickly came up with was they were best friends in college, but more importantly best friends at that time in life when the world seems open. You’re cocky, young and brash and feel like you can do anything. That reminds them, now in their early 30s, that they’ve lost that spark and they’ve lost that way. They want it back. And they are constantly colliding into each other trying to figure out how to get that back. They come up with a ridiculous way of doing it.”

The idea of the duo making the gay porn comes up during a small party. While the characters are seen drinking, Were other libations supposed to be ingested during the scene?

“There was a little bit of pot smoking going on if you can catch it,” Duplass said. “It was the pot and alcohol. We talked about the idea of taking it deeper into drugs. But we didn’t want to cheapen it and make it seem like it was just the drugs speaking. We wanted to get them tipsy enough that they could do it, but not so tipsy that it wasn’t rooted in their desires.”

During this talk of gay sex at the party, Leonard’s character gets frisky with Monica played by Lynn Shelton. Was that a perk for the part?

“I do wind up making out with Lynn” said Leonard. “That was my one contractual stipulation. I had to make out with the director. I try to put that in all my contracts. This is the first time it worked out.”

Duplass also had his time making out with a woman before heading off to the hotel room with Leonard. Alycia Delmore played his wife. They built up their relationship using 21st century help.

“We talked on the phone and did some iChats ahead of time,” Duplass said. “We both had a pretty good understanding of our characters so we didn’t really talk to much about backstories between them. Alycia had such a good grasp of her character and it’s such a tough character to play. It can so easily become the cuckold who doesn’t know what’s going on and is not intelligent or the person that knows everything that’s going on and is a shrew. She rode that fine line so well, I followed a lot of her leads on these things. It was my job to bring her all the terrible news and feel her reaction.”

The interaction between the cast and crew helped the improv story take shape. “It was a team effort completely,” Leonard said. “It was one of those rare scenarios where the best idea always won and it didn’t matter whose it was. Nobody cared where it came from.”

And it seemed that nobody in the crew knew how the film was going to end.

“We shot the whole film in sequence and that was the last scene we shot,” Duplass said. “While each scene was improvised, they were very plotted out where the characters wanted to go. The final scene we didn’t do any plotting or what should or could or would happen. We were checking into a motel at 7 o’clock tonight and checking out tomorrow morning at seven a.m. We’ll see what we get. We were shooting 50 minute takes. Just going and going and going. Interestingly enough, on the first take we did, about 80 percent of what we did in that first take is in the movie. At that point you know your characters so well, you’re living them, you just follow your instincts.”

The one buggy thing about the motel scene was there wasn’t a tripod on the videocamera. Why didn’t they have the essential tool for the aspiring home porn stars who want to be able to use all hands in the action?

“We didn’t want to get too involved in the semantics of it,” Duplass said. “Ben is trying to decide at the last minute if he’s going to go or not based on the conversation with his wife. Because it’s so last minute he’s only able to come up with this home videocamera approach. There’s a purity to that being less about anything technical and more about saying, it doesn’t matter what equipment we have. It’s all about capturing the moment.”

In the hotel room for those twelve hours was Mark, Josh, the cameraman, the soundguy and director Lynn Shelton running a camera. How did the duo keep up the awkward feeling through out the night?

“It wasn’t that difficult,” Leonard said. “I was standing with my buddy in my not particularly toned body in my boxer shorts trying to figure out a way to make sweet love to him.”

Neither actor felt the pressure to spend months in the gym to achieve Mario Lopez six packs. “Fortunately for press purposes we can tell everyone that we both gained weight for the roles,” Leonard said. “Raging Bull ain’t got nothing on us.”

Both men have been busy over the last year. Leonard played Jane Adam’s boyfriend on HBO’s Hung. He’s unsure if he’ll be in the upcoming season. “I haven’t even talked to those guys about that,” he said.

Most of his attention is focused on a bigger project. “I just directed a feature based on a T. Coraghessan Boyle story called The Lie. It’s about a guy who doesn’t want to go to work so he lies to his boss that his newborn baby has just died. The movie takes place in the ensuing five days between the time that the guy throws a grenade on his life and when it blows up in his face. It was done the same way. We arced out the treatment and improvised the dialogue. Ben Kasulke who shot Humpday shot this one.

“It was the coolest group of people. It was literally one of those experiences where I called all my favorite actor friends and had them come out for a couple days. We had a five month old baby as the third lead. It was not an easy shoot.” The film stars Jane Adams, Kelli Garner, Allison Anders and Holly Woodlawn.

Duplass’ upcoming film with his brother Jay Duplass will be screened at the upcoming Sundance. You might have caught him on FX’s The League. He’s the stud of a fantasy football league.

“We had a series of meeting with the creators of The League that went on for about six months,” he said. “I was concerned about my schedule doing a TV show since my brother and I have a pretty hefty writing-directing career. We work a lot. They said, we really want you. They guaranteed me a small amount of time that I have to work on the show.”

Coincidentally in the first episode, there’s a moment that deals with him and anal penetration. Does he fear being typecast as the heterosexual guy with the tempting backdoor?

“I’m hopeful, really,” Duplass said. “Jack Black plays musicians. I play the butthole guy. We’ve both got our niche.”

DIDN’T YOU DIE

Joshua Leonard might look somewhat familiar since he was in The Blair Witch Project. I inform Leonard that I spent a year worried about him after being shown the original teaser almost a year before the release when it was still supposedly real. I kept calling a pal to find out what was on the discovered film. Had the filmmaking trio been located?

“You weren’t the one who called my parents to offer your condolences?” Leonard asked. “Right when stuff first started coming out, they got a lot of condolence calls. They took that reality marketing to the nth degree.”

FESTIVUS SPECIAL

Happy Festivus. Now prepare to wrestle me for the last slice of meatloaf!

TIGER TRAPPED

Tiger Woods has let his fans down not because he had an affair, but because he screwed a skank from VH1’s Tool Academy. He’s the greatest golfer in the universe worth billions and he dumpster dives for a mistress. How exactly did he expect discretion from a celebutard?

It’s a miracle he can stand steady and focus on a putt since VH1 ought to be VD1 with their toxic dating pool. I often visit a health clinic for testing after accidentally exposing myself to For the Love of Ray J. Can you catch crabs from sitting too close to the TV?

No wonder his wife went after him with a golf club. Tiger was on the slippery slope of scooping up Brett Michael’s Rock of Love rejects as they fall from the bus. Tiger Woods might have ended up in a Devil’s threeway with Flavor Flav if Mrs. Woods didn’t break out the pitching wedge. That’s the rehab Dr. Drew needs to dish out.

INVEST NOW

Too many people have been caught up in Fox News’ conspiracy to inflate gold prices on the rumor of an upcoming robot holocaust religious war. Why in the middle of a Road Warrior future is gold really a good investment?

I watch enough warriors of the apocalypse films. It is my supremely educated opinion that in such a bleak scenario, there’s only two investments for the smart survivalists: water and hot young women. Which means you can get rich in the ground floor of a hot market. Party Favors wants your unwanted water and hot young women with Cash4H20andHOS. Just call our hotline number and we’ll send you an insured envelope. Fill the envelope with water and women and mail it back. Our professional experts will grade the contents and we’ll send you a check. Remember to not send us your crazy girlfriend. Even radioactive mutant freaks don’t want them or crazy cat ladies. They might want the cats for appetizers. You can send them to Cash4Cats.

Don’t delay and quit listening to Glenn Beck with his gold lies. Call 1-800-Cash4H20andHOS before the FBI shuts us down again.

MR DVD

Did anyone expect Wes Anderson’s The Fantastic Mr. Fox to completely implode upon wide release? How can you go wrong with distributing a kid’s film during the Christmas season? Earlier in the fall Spike Jonze’s adaptation of Maurice Sendak’s Where the Wild Things Are earned over $75 million. How did Anderson’s version Roald Dahl’s Fox barely adaptation of Fox not even clear a third of Wild Things opening week and fall off the Top 10 chart by the second weekend? Was it too adult for kids and too childish for adults? Was nobody interested in a Paddington Bear-esque stop-motion animation flick? Or was it that Anderson’s cinema aesthetic has cooled off the folks that might have been curious in seeing Fox? Who became the target of producer Scott Rudin’s Monday morning bagel missile?

Seeing how this is Anderson’s third consecutive theatrical thud, is it time he gets his name moved down below the title since it’s obviously not a great selling point? Forget judging the ticket sales against the rumored budgets. Five of his six theatrical releases didn’t earn enough money at the box office to cover the cost of advertising, promotions and striking 35mm prints. His core audience seems to be people who eager to collect the Criterion Collection discs of his movies. He’s a home video superstar star like a 21st Century Andrew Stevens except he’s got Bill Murray instead of Shannon Tweed.

SEASONAL WISHES

If I have one Christmas wish, it’s the return of saxophonists in the world of Rock music. Don’t let Kenny G. make the sax an instrument of wussdom.

If I can get a second one: Joel McHale and Patrick Warburton each need to host Saturday Night Live this season. Enough with the barely talented tweens stretching on the show.

Final wish would be simple – scratch and win on a Ric Flair lottery ticket.

CHRISTMAS GIFTS

This year’s annual Christmas gifts to grab have been mixed up. First off is Warners deciding to not come out with Looney Tunes – Golden Collection, Volume 7. They also held back on putting out anymore Popeye cartoons. So much for real vintage cartoons this year. However there are the megasets of Transformers: 25th Anniversary Matrix of Leadership Edition and G.I. Joe A Real American Hero: Complete Collector’s Set that gives all their ’80s animated goodness.

Normally I’d list Saturday Night Live: The Complete Fifth Season as a must grab. This was the season with the last of the Not Ready for Prime Time Players after Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi left. This was the end of the Buck Henry hosted episodes. Ultimately this is the last season of SNL that I’d willing pick up as boxset. Recently the first four seasons have been going at various stores for $15 instead of $70. I can wait till the price drop hits.

There is one thing on my must get list: The Complete Peanuts 1971-1974 contains volume 11 & 12 in the series. This is the time when Lucy and Linus get their brother Rerun. Also the birth of Joe Cool takes center stage. There’s still 25 years to go before Charles Schulz ended the strip. This should be a constant gift under the tree until 2016. Hope the world doesn’t end in 2012 cause I do want to see what I missed in the ’90s.

BLU-RAY HEAVEN

G-Force seemed like a joke movie poster in Tracy Morgan’s 30 Rock dressing room. Turns out they did make a film about a pack of guinea pigs that are high tech secret agents with beyond Bond gadgets. The CGI pets are voiced by major stars like Morgan, Steve Buscemi, Penelope Cruz, Jon Favreau and investment guru Nic Cage. Their unit become victims of government cutbacks. They’re returned to the pet store, but you know their fate won’t be stuck in a kindergarten. They must save the world. Kelli Garner of The Lie also shows up in human form. The Blu-ray looks good with the furry fury of the G-Force. The boxset also includes the DVD and a digital copy so you want watch it on an iPod. There’s plenty of bonus features with Jerry Bruckheimer showing us how he made Nic Cage finally have believable hair in a film. G-Force is the perfect mindless film to watch while enjoying the egg nog this Christmas.

Star Trek: The Original Series – Season 3 Blu-ray completes the Kirk and Spock TV years in 1080p. Like the previous editions, viewers can choose between the original effects and the enhanced HD CGI effects. The reason to get this set is “The Way to Eden” with the invasion of the Space Hippies! Charles Napier (Russ Meyer superstar and Squidbillies sheriff) riffs galactic groovy tunes on his futuristic guitar. Napier’s jaw was made for HiDef. Amongst the large amounts of bonus features is an early cut of “Where No Man Has Gone Before” that’s never been released. This was the second pilot with Kirk finally in the captain’s chair. They didn’t get to the end of their five year mission.

World’s Greatest Dad ruined my belief that Robin Williams is a complete sell out whore. How much hope could there be for him after crapping out Man of the Year and RV. Thankfully Bobcat Goldthwait brought him back to the delicious dark side of comic genius. Williams is a failed writer who is about to get fired from his high school for an unpopular poetry writing course. His son (Spy Kids‘s Daryl Sabara) is a gross teen who likes scat sex videos. Robin lives to flirt with the art teacher (Alexi Gilmore). Things go extremely bad when his son dies in hangs himself while jacking off. Robin does what any parent does in such a case – zips up his son’s pants and makes it look like a normal suicide. He writes a suicide note on the kid’s computer to explain this sad end. The letter becomes a hit. Robin exploits his son’s ghost to rejuvenate his own writing career. How far will he go to achieve success? It just gets extremely uncomfortable as Williams finally gives a performance that just won’t play for the braindead that loved Bicentennial Man. It’s such a relief that Bobcat was able to remind us that Robin Williams isn’t just a schmaltz fiend.

Taxi: The Final Season wraps up a prime sitcom in its fifth season. NBC picked up the show for what wasn’t the great ratings comeback. The big focus for a lot of the episodes were Latka (Andy Kaufman) and Simka (Carol Kane). “The Shloogel Show” is their little party for the rest of the gang. Rev. Jim also dominates the action. “Jim’s Inheritance” has him up for his dad’s fortune. His blood thirsty siblings want him ruled incompetent so they’d control the inheritance. It’s up to Alex (Judd Hirsch) and Louie (Danny DeVito) to back up his semi-sanity. “Scenskees from a Marriage” discloses Latka having a fling with a female cabbie. As punishment, they throw a party. The last male guest will sleep with Simka. “Crime and Punishment” gives the usually quiet Jeff (J. Alan Thomas) an episode. He gets framed for Louie skimming money. He finds himself being arrested. Will Louie confess or let his assistant take the rap? The big finale isn’t really a farewell episode with “Simka’s Monthlies.” She’s going to be deported. Judging how lame other sitcom farewells have been, it’s appreciated that Taxi didn’t wrap it up. We can still dream that Elaine Nardo (Marilu Henner) is hacking around Manhattan.

The Fugitive – Season Three, Volume Two contains the final 15 black and white episodes of this four year chase. No longer would Dr. Richard Kimble (David Janssen) hide in the shadows. “Wife Killer” pours on the pressure when Kimble kidnaps the Man with One Arm. Can he coax a confession and finally gain his freedom? Not to spoil the ending, but there are more episodes. “This’ll Kill You” puts Kimble in the employment of Mickey Rooney at a laundry. “Stroke of Genius” makes Telly Savalas play Beau Bridges’ son. Did Lloyd sign off on this? Telly’s brother George has a bit part. “With Strings Attached” presents Donald Pleasence an almost young. “The White Knight” lets future Mission: Impossible star Steven Hill and Arrested Development‘s Jessica Walter have a forbidden affair with Ted Knight (Too Close For Comfort) investigating. “In a Plain Paper Wrapper” unleashes a mean Kurt Russell under the direction of Richard Donner. Only one more year and Kimble’s entire flight from justice will be captured on DVD.

Perry Mason – Season 4, Volume 2 gives a dozen cases that twist like pretzel justice. “The Case of the Wintry Wife” goes boom when an inventor’s lab explodes. Michael Fox plays the autopsy surgeon. He’s the reason why there’s a Michael J. Fox. “The Case of the Angry Dead Man” has a rich guy gets declared dead even though he survived a near drowning. After a few days of being a ghost, he really does turn up dead. “The Case of the Barefaced Witness” presents Adam West. Always fun to see Batman tangle with Perry Mason (Raymond Burr). “The Case of the Grumbling Grandfather” creaks with Gavin MacLeod (The Love Boat). This is still my favorite legal series with it’s black and white certainty. There’s five more seasons to go.

Wizards of Waverly Place: The Movie – Extended Edition should be your go to holiday gift if you’ve got an elementary school niece. While doing an informal chat with 8 year old girls, I discovered that Selena Gomez has stolen all of Miley Cyrus’ heat. Gomez is part of a family of wizards-in-training. Her dad is played by David DeLuise, Dom’s son. The family goes on vacation and Gomez casts as spell that might wipe the family off the map. The only thing that can reverse her screwed up spell is the “Stone of Dreams.” Imagine the hours of silence as the kids leave you around during post Christmas cool down.

The Tudors The Complete Third Season gives us even more of Henry VIII’s wives. Anne Boleyn met the axe so now Henry (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) is on the prowl for a third wife. He’s also dealing with an insurrection upset at the ousting of the Catholic Church from England. Mostly they hate Thomas Cromwell (James Frain). Jane Seymour is next on base. She knows it’s all about popping out a boy to maintain her head. I don’t want to spoil this for those who skipped English history class, but Jane didn’t live for centuries to create the Open Hearts design. Henry remarries Anna of Cleeve (singer Joss Stone). This is a gutsy role since Stone is savaged as trollish. He moves onto Katherine Howard. She’s quite the minx. There’s only 8 episodes for this season even with three fresh wives in the mix. The next season on Showtime will wrap up Henry’s serial marrying ways along with his life. This is truly a classy production that properly relates history by mixing education with Cinemax After Dark moments.

The Girl From Monaco tangles legal work with a romantic playground. Fabrice Luchini is a major lawyer with strange ticks. He heads to Monaco to defend a notorious character. However the lawyer has plans to drop his legal briefs for Louse Bourgoin. She’s messing with his mind as you’d expect from a vixen of her calibre. When she’s in pure seduction mode, you’ll forget there’s a film going on. He forgets he has a paying client as he goes native. Always nice to have a Riviera tale on the TV screen while it’s getting nippy outside.

Chai Lai Angels: Dangerous Flowers is a Thai flavored take on Charlie’s Angels. This isn’t a carbon copy since you get five female undercover agents. The quintet are brought onto a case to protect the daughter of a professor and martial arts master. Gangsters swear she knows where to find the Andaman Pearl. She needs help from the Angels. There’s plenty of over the top action with plenty of the ladies kicking mobster ass. There’s a sweet car explosion that doesn’t look CGI enhanced. This is so much better than those Drew Barrymore Charlie’s Angels movies. The bonus features include music videos that introduce the five undercover agents.

December 16, 2009
Party Favors: Trumbo

SEATTLE — Dalton Trumbo was one of the biggest names in screenwriting who for the longest time wasn’t allowed to show his name on the screen. He won two Oscars, but wasn’t allowed to step onto the stage.

At the peak of his career in 1947, he was brought before the House Un-American Activities Committee to testify about communists in Hollywood films. Like other screenwriters before the HUAC, he refused to answer the questions. Their decision to not name names got them blacklisted in the industry and sent to prison. After nearly a year behind bars, Dalton secretly returned to screenwriting. He used fake names and front writers on various project. It wasn’t till 1960 when his name accompanied Exodus and Spartacus that the blacklist was broken.

Trumbo is a documentary about the writer that was originally a play written by his son Christopher Trumbo. The play had actors reading the letters written by Dalton over the course of his plight. The documentary was also written by Christopher as it mixed the letters with vintage with Dalton. Actors such as Dustin Hoffman, Liam Neeson, David Strathairn, Donald Sutherland and Michael Douglas read the letters of Dalton. It is a testimony to a man who survived and allowed his talent to shine in the darkest of hours.

I had a chance to swap questions via email with Christopher Trumbo about his father, the film (which is just out on DVD from Magnolia Home Entertainment) and Christopher’s own career as a screenwriter that included Ironside and Quincy.

Party Favors: How were royalty payments worked out when your father was writing under pen names? Or did they not have them at that time?

Christopher Trumbo: Writers didn’t receive residuals until 1960 or 1961; after the WGA went on strike in 1960.

PF: How did you feel about the experience of showing Trumbo at Durham’s Full Frame Documentary Film Festival?

Trumbo: I was enormously pleased with the film’s reception at the Full Frame Festival, all the more so because of Elizabeth Edwards’ introduction. The festival itself was a delight, I was treated better than I deserve, and Durham seemed a charming town.

PF: What was the most unusual thing you learned about your father while working on the documentary?

Trumbo: I don’t think I learned anything new about my father from working on the documentary. But I always learn from the actors who read the letters. Each of them, and there have been many by this time if you include those who associated themselves with the play, brings a unique sensibility that continually adds to my knowledge.

PF: Did you feel closer to your father during the process of making the film than when he was around?

Trumbo: No. But the film and the play focused my attention on trying to give as accurate a picture of him as I could to everyone associated with the production. Not only who he was or why he did one thing rather than another, but how the events of his life were tied together and the evolution of his ideas.

PF: Do you think you’ve figured out all the films he worked on under fake names?

Trumbo: No, and I don’t think anyone will. In the end, it’s not that important. Remember, he worked on many films he wouldn’t have been associated with had he not been blacklisted and sometimes desperate for a job.

PF: What did you think of Ann Coulter attempting to buff up the image of Joe McCarthy?

Trumbo: I suppose it keeps her busy, and that’s not a bad thing. The world is filled with opportunities for mischief.

PF: Do you find it ironic that your father won for The Brave One and Roman Holiday, but didn’t get to collect his Oscars, but Ring Lardner Jr. got to pick up the Oscar for MASH when he admitted that not a single line he wrote in the script made it to the screen?

Trumbo: Ring received the Oscar for “MASH” after he had become “un-blacklisted,” so there is really no comparison with “The Brave One” and “Roman Holiday.” Mike Wilson and Carl Foreman also received Oscars posthumously, in their case for “Bridge Over the River Kwai.”

For reasons that I am sure are clear to the Academy those Oscars were never alluded to or presented on television at Academy’s annual award ceremonies where sleek golden statuettes are bestowed upon the chosen, or in some cases to a surviving relative of the intended recipient if there has been a death.

The Academy did sponsor public ceremonies for blacklisted writers where Oscars changed hands, but the occasions were of a quiet nature, the kind of ceremony that appears to be reserved for screenwriters who wrote clandestinely. The fact that Academy changed its rules at one point in the 1950s to make sure that a blacklisted writer would not receive one of its awards may have something to do with its later reluctance to acknowledge the achievements of blacklisted writers in the same way they would recognize any other writer. Second class ceremonies for Trumbo, Wilson and Foreman.

PF: Do you think it was fair for the Academy to remove Ian McLellan Hunter’s name from the Oscar for Roman Holiday?

Trumbo: The Academy has its own rules. I don’t believe that fairness has anything to do with its considerations.

PF: What was it like establishing yourself as a screenwriter? Did your father’s name help or hurt during meetings? Did it give you a good sense of what sort of people you were dealing with?

Trumbo: To tell the truth, I’m not sure that my father’s name helped or harmed me. Maybe some of each, but if so my guess is they balanced each other out.

PF: When you wrote on Ironside, did you keep having to worry how you’d get the wheelchair into the locations since it was before they made buildings handicap accessible?

Trumbo: Ironside was much too clever to let lack of wheelchair access stop him from seeing justice done. His assistants, by the way, were quite nimble.

PF: What was it like working on the script for Quincy? Did they provide the scientific research? Did you get to write, “That’s tantamount to murder?”

Trumbo: Neither the network, the studio, or the people working on “Quincy” provided me or my co-writer, Jeff Freilich, any scientific research. We did it all ourselves.

I can’t imagine writing tantamount in dialog except as a possible rhyme for catamount, and then only if the character is reciting a limerick.

PF: Have you seen people change their opinion of your father after seeing the film?

Trumbo: I don’t know if anyone has changed their mind about my father as a result of seeing the film, and if they have, I haven’t been told. I’m certain there are people who had never heard of Trumbo who now have an opinion of him, and what that opinion is remains a mystery to me.

CHILD LABOR LAWS

In an attempt to cash in on using my offspring as a stepping stone to a Ryan Seacrest produced reality show; here’s the start of a series called, “Things I Can Tell My Daughter While She Hasn’t A Clue What I’m Saying.” Today’s topic is Disney films.

I’m ready to party with Michael Lohan and Jon Gosselin.

HALFTIME

This geezer tells me that he no longer watch the NFL games on TV because they cut away at halftime to the studio for game updates instead of showing 12 minutes of cheerleaders entertaining the crowd. I didn’t have a heart to tell the oldtimer that halftime at NFL games isn’t that exciting and doesn’t involve cheerleaders doing high school level routines. Got to let the man die with a fantasy intact.

The goal of any sports franchise at halftime is to get your ass in line for another two overpriced cups of beer. Entertainment detracts from that circle of cash. Although at Bengals-Browns games, halftime is when they have suicide prevention counselors next to the urinals.

BEAM ME UP 1080P

Star Trek – The Original Series: Season 2 Blu-ray gives us high definition transfers of the show with both the original effects and new CGI enhanced effects as options. You can choice if you want old school Trek or cyber school images. The second season (of three seasons) is memorable for one major reason: Tribbles! Those cute fuzzy balls of joy appear in “The Trouble with Tribbles.” The disc also contains the Tribble episodes from the animated cartoon series and Deep Space Nine. “Amok Time” has Spock returning to Vulcan to mate. Except it’s more complicated there than a bottle of Jack Daniels and a copy of Roxy Music’s Avalon. “Mirror, Mirror” puts Kirk into an alternate universe where the Enterprise crew are out of control. “Patterns of Force” takes the crew to a Nazi planet. “Bread and Circuses” switches it up to a Roman planet. Not to be confused with “Who Mourns for Adonais?” with an alien thinking he’s a Greek god. It’s a fine 26 episodes on the second season. The best bonus feature is “Billy Blackburn’s Home Movies.” He was the silent crewman who filled in for Sulu on the bridge. Turns out he had plenty of duties on the show playing monsters and aliens, but still had time to break out his movie camera to gets glimpses of the show. The remastered high-def image is space age superiority when compared to the old DVDs. This is the ultimate version of Star Trek: Season 2 that should sit on your TV next to your Klingon to Vulcan Dictionary. The Season 3 Blu-ray is scheduled for Dec. 15.

BLU-RAY FEAR-FEST

The Hannibal Lecter Collection Blu-ray gives us the first three films featuring everyone’s favorite cannibalistic shrink in 1080p glory. Manhunter was Michael Mann’s attempt to bring the Miami Vice style to the world of Cinemascope. The camera angles are sleek and the soundtrack dominates the action. William Petersen (C.S.I.) is the FBI profiler brought back into action to hunt down a serial killer who kills families. Petersen’s technique is to get into the head of the killer. This takes him into dark places. He gets a little assistance from Hannibal Lecktor (Brian Cox) in hunting down a serial killer nicknamed the Tooth Fairy (Tom Noonan ofMonster Squad). The big finale is all timed to Iron Butterfly’s “Inna Gadda Da Vida”. Silence of the Lambs is the Oscar standard for serial killer films. Nearly 2 decades later, the interaction between Jodie Foster’s FBI agent and Anthony Hopkins’ version of Lector is thrilling. Ted Levine (Monk) is peerless as the Jame Gumb torturing Brooke Smith (Weeds). Keep an eye out for the legendary Tracey Walter (Repo Man) and Charles Napier (Squidbillies). Hannibal lets Anthony Hopkins take Hannibal on a tasting tour of Italy. Julianne Moore takes over Jodie Foster’s role. This is a semi-love story where Ray Liotta gets served like monkey brains. The transfers on all three films look great. There are no bonus features so don’t dump your DVDs if you upgrade.

Child’s Play Blu-ray reminds us why it’s not good for cops to shoot down killers inside toy stores. In this case, the killer transfers his evil soul into the body of a Chucky doll. And this little creeping plastic boy is ready to continue life-taking. He wants to put his soul into his new owner. This is what spurred the long running series. There’s loads of bonus features and a DVD copy for you to let the kids watch in the back of the mini-van. It’s a great way to get them to shut up about going to Toys-R-Us.

Wrong Turn -Blu-ray reminds America why under all circumstance, there is no good short cut that involves cutting through West Virginia. Two cars make the wrong turn and end up wrecking in the middle of nowhere in the backwoods mountains. You’d figure this could be a cute romance with Jeremy Sisto (Six Feet Under) working his magic on Eliza Dushku (Dollhouse) and Emmanuelle Chriqui (Sloan on Entourage). But before this can turn into a Cinema After Dark masterpiece, a pack of mutant cannibalistic hillbillies attack them. Why do these toothless wonders have to interrupt the love? This film reminds us why it’s best to take the long way to Raleigh, North Carolina. Amongst the bonus features is a commentary track with Dushku contributing.

Wrong Turn 2: Dead End – Blu-ray takes us back into the West Virginia hills. This time Henry Rollins is the host of a survivalist reality competition show. He drags six kids into the wilderness with the quest of seeing which one can thrive. However mutant cannibal hillbillies aren’t part of the pre-production schedule. Did the PAs remember to get model release forms signed by the hillbillies? Shame there aren’t more reality shows that mix their cast with inbred cannibal hillbillies. This would be great upgrade for Hell’s Kitchen. The bonus features allow us to study the thespian techniques of Henry Rollins.

Misery – Bluray is also another warning tale involving evil people you can encounter in the mountains. However instead of an inbred cannibal, writer James Caan encounters uber-fan Kathy Bates when she saves him from a snowy wreck. While he recovers at her house, she gets a sneak peak at his upcoming novel. She’s doesn’t like his latest plot twist and decides to give him attitude adjustment involving a lighter fluid and sledgehammers. Bates won the Oscar for being the ultimate psycho fan and she’s extra creepy in Hi-Def. They include the DVD version as a bonus. It contains all the special features including several pieces on stalking fans. There’s a commentary track from Rob Reiner.

DVD SHELF

The Paul Newman: The Tribute Collection contains 13 of the icon’s finer screen moments. The set includes The Long, Hot Summer, Rally ’round the Flag, Boys!, From the Terrace, Exodus, The Hustler, Adventures of a Young Man, What a Way to Go!, Hombre, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Towering Inferno, Buffalo Bill and the Indians, or Sitting Bull’s History Lesson, Quintet and The Verdict. Has it really been a year since Newman passed away? He was one of finest actors, a fun race car driver and a great salad dressing chef. His best three films in this box set are The Hustler, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid and The Verdict. Although for pure dumb fun, put on The Towering Inferno. He’s the architect of a skyscraper that catches fire because of cheap wiring. It’s up to Newman, Steve McQueen and O.J. Simpson to save the party in the penthouse. One thing you’ll realize after a few of these films is that Paul Newman knew how to act with a drink in his hand. This collection goes perfect with a bag of Newman’s Own popcorn.

The Haunted World of El Superbeasto allows Rob Zombie to bring motion to his outrageous comic creations. The main hero is a Mexican wrestler who has branched out to making adult films and fighting Dr. Satan (voiced by Paul Giamatti). Turns out the ultimate in evil is going to marry Rosario Dawson. Superbeasto doesn’t care too much, but superheroine Suzi X (Sheri Moon Zombie) makes it her business while she’s fighting nazi zombies. It’s kind of like an Adult Swim project except with tons of female nudity. They have plenty of great actors contributing voices including Clint Howard, Sid Haig, Geoffrey Lewis, Laraine Newman, Danny Trejo and Elvira. Unfortunately there’s no bonus feature of them in the vocal booth. They do have moments that didn’t make the cut.

Taxi: The Fourth Season finally arrives after four years since the release of Season 3. Talk about a slow cab ride. This is the series that launched the career of Jeff Conaway into Celebrity Rehab stardom. This season he pops up until he’s completely written out. Who needs him when you’ve got Tony Danza? “Jim the Psychic” has Christopher Llyod (Back to the Future) swear he sees the death of Judd Hirsch. Part of the vision come true enough to spook Danny Devito that his favorite cabbie is going to bite it. “Vienna Waits” has Judd and Marilou Henner take a B-roll tour of Europe. Will their vacation lead to a romantic getaway? Or will Judd be a big tool? A slight warning that there are a few musical moments clipped. A guitarist song to Henner on the airplane is grounded. The 24 episodes have plenty of laugh worthy moments especially with the antics of Andy Kaufman as Latka. The fifth (and final) season is scheduled for Dec. 22

Mitch Fatel Is Magic: Live, Extended & Uncensored brings us the dirty Rain Man of comedy. Mitch has nailed the man-child voice without it being irritating. His observations about sex, oral sex, breasts and sex with animals are disturbing and on target. The Oral sex with closed eyes routine has been proven true by medical science. “The handjob is the ugly stepsister of all the jobs,” he declares. He’s like a third grader explaining sex on the playground if the kid figured out how to get past his parents’ web-block program on the computer. He mentions how finding out his date had sex with a horse would be a bit of a bump in establishing a relationship. Unlike the short Comedy Central special, the DVD performance is 65 minutes without any bloopers. And what’s the point of missing out on Mitch discussing golden showers? For those fearful of comedy magic – it’s just one trick at the start. The bonuses on the DVD include cut jokes including his Christian Bale moment, animated version of his matching bra and panties joke and fans testifying to Mitch being a pervert. This is the perfect gift to send the Duggar family.

The Ghost Whisperer: The Fourth Season brings us more Jennifer Love Hewitt talking to dead people. This is a big season since Jennifer’s Melinda ends up marrying Jim Clancy (David Conrad). Even on their honeymoon, she can’t stop seeing ghosts. Which is strange since most honeymooners don’t see what’s on the other side of their hotel room door. She also gets knocked up. The scary season finale has her discover the date of her death is her due date. Is it a spoiler if CBS is advertising a fifth season is going on the air with Jennifer? Bonus features include the webisodes, interactive games a tribute to Jamie Kennedy joining the show as Eli James. In case you don’t read People Magazine, Kennedy is Jennifer’s boyfriend. Guess he’s getting career advice from Tom Arnold.

Friday 13th The Series: The Final Season gives us the last 19 episodes of the syndicated series that ended in 1990. Not to give away any secrets, but Jason Voorhees doesn’t make a cameo in the final episode. The show has Louise Robey and Steve Monarque running around the country retrieving evil items sold from an evil antiques store. The series was shot in Canada so the guest stars are probably more famous for readers in Toronto. “Crippled Inside” is an early break for Dean McDermott before he made a career out of shagging Tori Spelling. “Year of the Monkey” has Tia Carrera (Wayne’s World). Colm Feore (Slings and Arrows) proves he’s “Mightier Than the Sword.” The final episode “The Charnel Pit” has Robey fall through a painting and meet the Marquis de Sade. She gets laced up and ready for a flogging.

Director Brett Ratner The Shooter Series: Volume 1 is the backstory to the man who took the helm of the Rush Hour films. This is a collection of his music videos and commercials. Among the videos are Madonna’s “Beautiful Stranger,” Wu-Tang Clan’s “Triumph” and LL Cool J’s “Pink Cookies in a Plastic Bag Getting Crushed By Buildings.” Now that’s a title of a song that always needs to get referenced in reviews of NCIS: Los Angeles. Ratner provide commentary to all the projects. A 33 minute documentary is a celebrity testimonial to his talent. Best moment is him showing Jessica Simpson how to strut around the General Lee in her “Boots Were Made For Walking” video.

Triangle brings together a threesome of legendary Hong Kong directors on one project. Johnny To (The Heroic Trio), Tsui Hark (Once Upon a Time in China) and Ringo Lam (City On Fire) each wrote and directed a 30 minute segment of the film. Three men desperately in need of cash get involved in a robbery scheme that turns into a treasure map. It gets good and twisted when a shady cop banging one of their wives muscles his way into the action. There’s plenty of action on the screen from this trio.

Fame: The Complete Seasons 1 & 2 tones down the movie about the high school for the performing arts. It’s still a drama about talented high school students that want to perform, but they’re not merely as messed up as real art school kids. Debbie Allen is the dance instructor that stirs the pot. Benjamin Hague is the music teacher who wants to get these kids to reach deep down for their art although he doesn’t like synths. Gene Anthony Ray is the dancer who must overcome his educational deficiencies to keep learning how to move. It’s a nice primer for anyone thinking they should apply to an art school. The first 38 episodes on 8 single-sided DVDs.

Brotherhood: The Final Season wraps up the Showtime series about two powerful brothers in Rhode Island. Tommy is a moving up fast in state government. Mike is also making a power grab in the local crime world. The show has a gritty real feel like The Wire. Unfortunately it never quite grabbed the cult love which explains why it only got 8 episodes in its farewell lap. Luckily all three seasons are now on DVD so you can rediscover it on your own time.

Life On Mars: The Complete Series adapts the Manchester sci-fi cop drama to the gritty streets of New York City in 1973. They did a good job in the casting of the US version with Jason O’Mara as Detective Sam Tyler, Harvey Keitel as Lt. Gene Hunt, Michael Imperioli as Det. Ray Carling and Gretchen Mol as Annie Norris. In case you haven’t seen the original, while on a case in 2008, Sam Tyler gets knocked out. He wakes up and it’s 1973. He can’t figure out if this is a coma dream or if he really went through a slip in time. He has to keep up his job as a cop, but he no longer has modern crime fighting tools like cellphones and the internet. He’s at the mercy of Keitel, a cop who likes to beat out confessions. There’s constant hints that something is weird as Sam sees little robots and hears voices from the future. The show was just a little bit too weird for American audiences and lasted only 17 episodes. A bonus feature here has Lee Majors visiting the cast. How will Michael Imperioli’s mustache react to meeting the Six Million Dollar Man?

CSI NY: The Fifth Season brings us more criminal tales from the rotten core of the Big Apple. “Veritas” has Gary Sinise being found after being kidnapped at the end of last season. However he can’t be much help since a concussion has made him forget what happened. Elias Koteas (Crash and Exotica) guest stars so you know trouble is around the corner. “Page Turner” has a woman turn up dead at a Maroon Five concert. Coincidentally, the only reason I’d be at a Maroon Five concert is because someone killed me and dumped my body in the cheap seats. You wouldn’t sniff a corpse in the crowd with their crap coming out of the speakers. “My Name is Mac Taylor” has a serial killer taking victims who have the same name as Gary Sinise’s character. “Forbidden Fruit” has a woman die after eating the latest miracle fruit. Did Oprah and Dr. Oz promote this episode? There’s 25 episodes this season.

Ugly Betty: The Complete Third Season wraps up what might be the end of the Ugly era. Rumor has it that the next season America Ferrera is getting a makeover on scale with The Devil Wears Prada. For this season, we get a little taste of crazy with Lindsay Lohan as a guest star. Seems like she was supposed to last a little longer in the role, but she drove the producers nuts. I’m shocked. Supposedly she was more out of control than her back biting character who uses and abuses Betty. As a bit of a rest, they also cast the always charming Bernadette Peters (The Jerk). She still looks great after all these years.

Castle: The Complete First Season has all 10 episodes of the mid-season replacement series. The premise has Rick Castle (Nathan Fillion) being a famous crime writer who gets called by the NYPD when a serial killer is copy-cat killing based on his novels. He hooks up with Det. Kate Beckett (Stana Katic) to follow the case. He starts to work on his next book with a fictionalized version of her as his new lead character. The show harkens back to Remington Steele in tone and chemistry between the two leads. There’s also a Rockford Files vibe since Stephen J. Cannell cameos. A bonus feature lets Cannell take center stage.

The Hills Run Red claims that in 1982 the original version of The Hills Run Red was released and quickly pulled from theaters because it was just too disgusting. The prints were destroyed and the cast vanished. This movie is about the mystery of that movie. Did it really exist? Young filmmaker Tad Hilgenbrinck can’t stop investigating it. His main lead is Sophie Monk. She’s dancing in a stripclub. Unlike Megan Fox in Jennifer’s Body, Sophie drops her top while shaking it in the champagne room. She guides Tad and his friends out to the rural location of the film. Turns out her co-star is still on the scene. The bloodbath continues since someone wants to make a sequel. There’s a 28 minute behind the scene documentary to remind us this was all just a film, although it’s still a very gory film.

September 24, 2009
Party Favors: A Haunting In Connecticut

HARTFORD — Lately American horror films have devolved into remaking (or re-imagining, as the studio publicists insist) the fright films of the ’70s and ’80s. It’s like we’ve run out of spooks. Luckily last spring there was a cinematic scare-fest that brought us a fresh set of chills with The Haunting In Connecticut.

A mother (Virginia Madsen) rents an ex-funeral home so her son (Kyle Gallner) can be close to the hospital where he undergoes radiation chemotherapy to combat Hodgkin’s lymphoma. The son sees strange things in the house. Seems a few of the former clients hadn’t left with their embalmed bodies. The film is based on a true story.

The Haunting In Connecticut is out on DVD and Blu-ray in both the PG-13 cut and the Unrated Special Edition from Lionsgate. To celebrate the release, the Party Favors hotline received calls from director Peter Cornwell and Carmen Reed, the mother whose ghostly encounters were the basis of the movie.

The DVD includes a documentary about the real incidents Carmen Reed experienced in the haunted house during the mid-80s. Not to spoil the flick, but the house in the movie looks like nothing like the actual haunted ex-funeral home. The real one is a regular neighborhood while the movie version is remote in the woods. Reed didn’t mind the alterations, but admitted that “it didn’t look like anything like the one I lived in.”

How involved was she in the fictionalized version of her supernatural experience?

“I talked to the director and the screenwriters for months before they started the production,” she said.

Did she demand any changes in their script?

“No,” she said. “They had a template idea of what they wanted when they went in.” She’s at ease with the dramatic liberties in the film. “I have to remind people that this is a movie that’s based on my story. It’s not a blow-by-blow. I’m not angry of anything. I think they did an excellent job on my movie.”

The film does not come close to ending like the actual event. How did things come to a head at the real house? “We ended with an exorcism,” she said. “Trying to push them back through the doors and close the doors and keep it that way.”

Did the exorcism work?

“Oh yeah. Only when I go into great detail about the story does anything ever happen.”

At this point in the interview I’m concerned about her ghosts coming through the telephone wire to spook me. Will the Party Favors headquarters need its own exorcism?

“No,” she said. “Not generally to you. It would be to me.”

Now I’m going to feel guilty if she upsets the spirits. Enough gabbing about the undead. How did she feel when she found out Virginia Madsen (Sideways) was playing her in the movie?

“I was thrilled,” Reed said. “She’s a beautiful, classy lady. I’m honored to have her play me.”
?Did they spend a lot of time together while the actress researched the role?

“No,” she said. “I’ve never spoken to Virginia Madsen. I’ve never met her. She must have watched the documentary. She had my hand mannerisms.”

Did she have contact with any of the actors wanting to research their roles? “No. I don’t know if they had time. They just never spoke with me.”

Does she suspect that the actors were afraid that making contact with her might upset the ghosts and get them haunted in process?

“Maybe,” she said. “I hope they wouldn’t be like that, but you never know. Anytime I talk to other people about it, for example I was talking to my sister in South Carolina. She started experiencing banging on her walls and things of that nature. I was afraid I would harm someone else.”

When the family moved into the ex-funeral house, what remained from the former occupants?

“When we moved in, there was still a gurney to hold the coffin, a lung nail, there was face putty, eyelashes, make up,” Reed said. “There was bloodstains on the wall. There was a blood tank. There was a body lift that went from the morgue up into the viewing area, which was my bedroom. There was a pad on my ceiling in my bedroom where the coffin would hit the ceiling. There was lots of personal paraphernalia, hats, coats, and some photos. There were toetags.”

Did the landlord clean it up much before her family moved in?

“He cleaned a lot of it out, but we had to repaint the rooms because their was blood splatter all over,” Reed said. “I had to pull an intestine out of the sink. It was pretty gory. But we got it all cleaned up.”

The movie compacts the amount of time the real family spent at the address. They had lived in the house for two years, but it everyone wasn’t haunted the entire time.

“The first time my son walked in there, he heard his name called,” she said. “He heard voices and saw apparitions on the very first day. (It was) the last nine weeks we lived in the house that we started experiencing things. It mostly bothered my oldest boy and then it gradually included my other children.

“We thought it was related to him receiving cobalt to the head and neck. You don’t know what kind of side effects those things are going to have. I don’t care what the doctors say. Cobalt is radioactive.” She was warned that if her son had knocked a vial out of the doctor’s hand and onto the floor, they’d have to shut down the unit and remodel. “I’m surprised he didn’t glow in the dark.”

What did she do when she realized that this wasn’t all a part of her son’s chemo?

“The next day after all that started happened to me, I called the Catholic church and had an interview with my local parish priest. He didn’t give me satisfaction so I went directly to the Archdiocese. They had five or six different people interview me. Finally one gentleman came out to the house and interviewed me at length. He told me that I needed a drug test, psychological test and lie detector. In the end I didn’t have to take those things. He determined I wasn’t crazy, on drugs or lying. He blessed the house. He determined to send an exorcist in. The first exorcist they sent in came under attack. He took us to another exorcist since he didn’t feel he could be effective.”

The movie only has one priest enter the house. Reverend Popescu is played by Elias Koteas (Exotica).

“Elias looks a lot like John Zaffis, who was the researcher in the house,” she admitted. “He has a lot of his mannerism, but he wasn’t the minister. He did help a lot in the house. He was there 9 1/2 weeks.”

How long afterward did the family stick around the funeral home?

“A week after the exorcism,” she said. “We waited to make sure everything was calm and we moved out.”

She’s seen the film four times. What scared her the most in the dark theater?

“I think the guy in the closet made me jump. It was more because everyone else screamed in the theater,” she admitted.

Did she ever catch herself yelling at her cinematic character to not open the door?

“No,” she said. “I cried through the whole thing. It was reliving my son’s cancer treatment. Some of the guilt I still carry from that. All four times I cried through the whole thing. I wasn’t so much scared.”

Does Reed get calls from people wanting to know if their house is really haunted by the dead?

“That’s what I do,” she said. “I counsel people who are going through it. Many times they want me to check their house out. I will find them someone if there in an area that I can get to them readily.”

Does she find herself being contacted by people who think they’re being haunted by dead family members or are these people who just bought a house without knowing former occupants haven’t checked out?

“Usually it’s a lot of people that have just got a haunting and they don’t care who it is,” Reed said. “They just want them gone. If the spirits are causing them distress, they want them gone.”

What event sets them off to want help removing the ghost?

“It’s generally when it starts frightening kids,” Reed said. “People are very protective of their children.”

How did her own children react to seeing their personal ghost story on the screen?

“I think they’re all thrilled with it,” she said. “It’s hard to sit and watch it with them because they’re saying, ‘That didn’t happen’ and ‘This happened this way.’ I had to warn them beforehand that this isn’t exactly blow by blow of our house, but they still have to critique it.”

When they finally moved out the haunted funeral home, did she get her security deposit back?

“You know, I don’t think we did,” Reed said. No one has ever asked me that. I really haven’t thought about it. But no, I don’t think so.”

A few minutes later director Peter Cornwell rang up the Party Favors hotline (which was hopefully ghost-free). The Australian director had made a name from himself with the short stop-motion film “Ward 13.” The Haunting In Connecticut was his first feature film. What attracted him to the project?

“I’d watched tons of haunted house films and there aren’t that many good ones so it didn’t take very long to see them,” Cornwell said. “When I read the script, I realized this is really original and different. I wanted for my first film to be in a contained environment. I liked the idea that you’re stuck in a pressure cooker environment. The house becomes a character in this film. The logic of the script made sense. The hardest thing in a haunted house story is coming up with something besides being built on an Indian burial ground. We get this intricate backstory that has layers that keeps you intrigued. The character stuff is great. Getting the opportunity to work with Virginia Madsen and Kyle Gallner.”

He was very proud to mention that Gallner is “now starring in A Nightmare on Elm Street playing Johnny Depp’s part.” After being attacked by ghosts, Gallner now will be chased by a razor glove wearing Jackie Earle Haley (Bad News Bears and The Watchmen).

One of the interesting pieces of casting is reuniting Elias Koteas and Virginia Madsen, the stars of The Prophecy. Did he realize what he was doing?

“I found that out. Virgina told me all about that,” he said. “I don’t think either of them had much fun making that film so they enjoyed being able to get back together and clean the slate. I really enjoyed The Prophecy. I watched it after I had directed them both. It was funny seeing two actors I’d directed in a scene in another film.”

How much time did he spend at the real haunted ex-funeral home?

“I remember looking it up on Google Earth and discovering it was really right near a graveyard,” he said. “But no. The budget didn’t allow me to fly out to Connecticut. Even though Connecticut had a tax break, I was thinking it made sense to make it to shoot it in Connecticut. But they were no. We shot it in Winnipeg.”

Does he think the cast avoided talking to the family to avoid any contact with any lingering ghosts?

“Maybe,” he said. “The writers worked with Carmen for two years on the script. I was talking to the writers a lot and they knew (the family’s) minds.”

The film differs a lot from the experiences of Carmen Reed and her family. How does he view leaving out certain elements of their testimony like the little kid in the Superman pajamas?

“Some of the stuff was creepy in real life, but might not really work in a movie,” he said.

Folks can get the Unrated Special Edition of the film. How did this cut come around?

“The Un-rated cut is more graphic,” he said. “Originally we submitted the film and got an R. We wanted to try and get it back down to a PG-13. Because it’s a ghost story, you’re not missing out in a gory death like you do in a slasher film. We managed to be as disturbing. We didn’t revert to the previous version. It’s more sort of the pumped up version of the PG-13 with close ups and stuff.

There’s already news that the film will spawn two sequels with The Haunting in New York and The Haunting in Georgia. Is he part of the upcoming productions?

“Gold Circle (the production company) are. I’m not,” Cornwell said. He can’t discuss what his next project will be.

How hard was it to make sure the frightening moments in the film worked? Did he have to drag in innocent eyes into the editing room to see them pop?

“I think I have a pretty good sense of how it works from how I storyboarded the scenes. For me it’s a big thing of how you reveal the monster. How do you create a scare? I’ve watched a lot of horror films and there’s reveals in this film that I’ve never seen in other films. I was thrilled when it worked. When we first screened it to random people off the street at the first big scare, people screamed their heads. People were jumping and screaming all through the film which was great. When you jump, that’s when it really gets scary. I don’t think you can have a really scary film that doesn’t make you jump. What makes it work is that you really care about the family. When the characters are in jeopardy, you worry for that person and you’re not worried about yourself jumping.”

Was The Haunting in Connecticut a play upon Christmas in Connecticut, most recently remade with Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger as the director?

“I’ve never really thought about that,” Cornwell said. “That might be why they named the original documentary? We just called it that because of the documentary.”

AMERICAN DOUCHEBAGS

If there’s one industry that’s not hurting in America, it’s the production of douchebags. Turn on the TV see the bounty harvest of douchebags. It’s time for a Douchebag of the Year Award.

Originally this hardware was a lock for Spencer Pratt of The Hills on MTV. I don’t watch the show since Showtime still has OnDemand adult content. But the clips that make The Soup on E! have shown Spencer to be the biggest douchebag that hasn’t run for public office, played sports or done anything in his life other than attempt to grow a beard. His antics on NBC’s I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here really made me wish they had been stuck on Cannibal Island. Why didn’t he get an intestinal parasite during his jungle days? Because he is an intestinal parasite. However all of Spencer’s douche work was blown away when Bravo debuted NYC Prep.

The reality show follows a group of extremely rich white high schoolers in Manhattan. The girls are cute although a couple of them appear to be headed towards MTV’s 16 and Pregnant. The star of the show is PC (Peter Peterson), a senior who acts like he’s auditioning for the Broadway version of Bret Easton Ellis’ American Psycho. He’s not merely a teenage douchebag. He’s an adult size douchebag stuck in a child’s body. Kinda of like Danny Bonaduce. I find his smug antics to be precious simply because I have zero contact with this guy. Although I don’t blame him for being a douchebag since who the hell names their kid Peter Peterson? Is his cousin Michael Micheals?

But PC’s reign as America’s top Douchebag was incredibly short. Who could trump this privileged jerk? Would you believe a middle aged father of eight in the midst of an identity crisis?

When Jon & Kate Plus Eight turns splitsville, America blamed the break up of the marriage on Kate Gosselin. She had that horrible haircut, controlling attitude and dreams of being Octo-Oprah. She came off so cold and self-absorbed during the interview segments. When news of the divorce hit, people felt Jon needed to bolt. The world thought she’d ripped his balls off. With all the sympathy of the world, Jon proved us all wrong in one little photo.

There was Jon wearing a crummy Ed Hardy t-shirt, diamond studs in his ears, over-priced sunglasses. He was sharing cigarettes with his 22 year-old girlfriend in the south of France while waiting to hang out on designer Christian Audigier’s yacht. It was not the look of a man with 8 kids across the Atlantic and the ink still drying on his separation papers. This was a guy who cashed out on the family life for a world reserved for people with old money or talent. How much of his girlfriend’s vacation cash came out of his kids’ college fund?

Supposedly this trip to Saint Tropez was work. He’s going to help launch Ed Hardy For Kids. Do you really want your kids wearing that over-priced junk? Wouldn’t you be better off buying your kids t-shirts and Sharpie markers to create their own spastic designs? What’s his angle? Clothes dads can buy their kids when they’re ready to “upgrade” their wives? Is he really going to make yacht money from this deal? Jon priced an apartment in Trump Tower with his girlfriend. What sort of gravy train does he imagine he’s riding? Is the new girlfriend going to pump out nine puppies at once? Now that the Masche sextuplets are camera ready on We’s Raising Sextuplets, the Goselins days are numbered. There’s just too much creepy divorce drama to imagine the cameras need to be around the Goselin kids. Once the trainwreck appeal ends, Jon & Kate Plus Eight will be uncomfortable viewing on par with The Osbournes: The Rehab Days. But a douchebag thinks that they’ll always be superstars in the eyes of America. There’s no need to think of the day the cameras disappear.

When Jon returned from France, he told the reporters that he’d returned “to film” for the series Not that he needed to return for his kids. He needed to spend quality time in front of the cameras with those 8 kids as extras. Man has to keep up the career so he can keep his little girlfriend happy. It’s not about the kids, it’s about his toys. And that’s why Jon Gosselin is America’s Greatest Douchebag.

DVD SHELF

Joss Whedon’s Dollhouse: Season One presents Eliza Dushku as a woman who can be anything you want. While it seemed like this would be a woman on adventures, the series gets into the internal politics of maintaining such a business. There’s a reporter wanting to expose the whole operation. Olivia Williams (Rushmore) is the prig in charge of The Dollhouse (not to be confused with Thee Dollhouse). There’s a lot of gunfire and mind games. Above it all, there’s Eliza looking hot no matter what role her clients want. The first three DVDs contain the 12 episodes that ran last year on Fox. The 4th disc contains what fans of Whedon crave including the original cut of the pilot “Echo” and the unaired “Epitaph One.” The unaired episode is getting run at Comic-con for those heading out to San Diego. This is a first season boxset with plenty of surprises beside what Eliza will be doing.

Jim Breuer – Let’s Clear The Air lets the star of Half Baked admit that he’s not always high. He was just born with a face that makes him look stoned. The hour long special includes his tale of teaching Dave Chappelle to drive a car. His story of appearing in Half Baked involves him being fully baked when he went before the cameras after his role was upgraded. He was stoned while working against Clarence Williams III (Linc from The Mod Squad). Breuer reflects on what it’s like to be the father of three young girls. He swears the volume knob was busted on his daughter. His hatred of kiddie music is dead on. I’m up for the Metallica for the kiddies album. He reminds the couples thinking of having babies that they need to imagine a world without sleep. The bonus short of “Fireside Chat With Dad” shows where Jim learned to handle a rough crowd. Dad wants his money and food. Breuer proves he’s more than the guy who hosted The Joe Pesci Show on Saturday Night Live. He’s still funny even if you’re not stoned.

The Lucy Show: The Official First Season contains the continuation of I Love Lucy minus the men. Lucy (Lucille Ball) is now a widow with two kids. Instead of being Ethel, Vivian Vance plays Vivian, a divorcee with a young son. She’s not even dressed in Ethel’s frumpy clothes. The two single moms share a house in a quiet New York town. The lack of Desi Arnaz and William Frawley (Fred Mertz) allows Lucy and Vivian to get caught up in too many harebrained schemes. There’s nobody to truly put a stop to them – outside of cops. The most memorable episode of the season is “Lucy Visits The White House.” Lucy and Viv’s Cub Scouts build a White House out of sugar cubes before their big trip to Washington D.C. On a whim, Lucy calls the president’s office to see about giving it as a gift. JFK answers the phone and tells her to drop by with the kids. The trip turns out to be a disaster when the sugar cubes take a hit. Can she and Viv redo the project in time? The boxset is loaded with bonus features including the commercials featuring Lucy, Viv and their kids that ran during the shows. They even show off the vintage comic books and board games associated with Lucy’s new show. This is the perfect gift for the Lucy fanatic in your life.

Early Edition: The Second Season stars Kyle Chandler (Friday Night Lights) as a guy who gets a newspaper with tomorrow’s news. He’s becomes a subscription superhero trying to undo bad headlines. “Angels and Demons” has Nia Peebles playing a nun. She was recently playing a dead beauty contestant on Matlock: The Third Season. “March of Time” has future Speed Racer star Emile Hirsch. The episode had Kyle discover a racist leader is going to be assassinated during a hate march. Should he really stop this headline from happening? He should have stopped Speed Racer from going into production. “A Regular Joe” has Kyle attempting to talk a quarterback into retiring since the next game will put him on the severally disabled list. The episode gets bonus points for starring Hall of Famer Dick Butkus. If only newspapers worked like this, the Boston Globe wouldn’t be slashing salaries.

Leverage: The 1st Season allows Timothy Hutton to put together a financial version of Mission: Impossible. He’s an ex-insurance company investigator who got screwed over by his employer when his son was sick. The kid died waiting for treatment. Now he’s out to get revenge on these folks with a crew made up of folks he nailed for fraud. They stage elaborate scams to set up their victims for the kill. “The Nigerian Job” has him him being tricked into stealing aviation secrets for the wrong guy. Hutton won’t be screwed. He comes up with a front that involves real Nigerians. “The Two-Horse Job” sounds like something that costs an extra C note at the Bunny Ranch. It’s just a guy killing off his underachieving race horses. Whatever happened to just sending them off to the Alpo factory. “The Miracle Job” has them save a church. It’s a mission oriented 12 episodes on the box set. Best bonus feature is the cast being told the series has been renewed. The second season of Leverage is about to kick off on TNT.

This American Life: Season Two continues the stellar Showtime TV adaptation of the radio show. Host Ira Glass brings another six episodes that explore the American experience. “Going Down In History” documents a jailbreak that involved dental floss. “Scenes From a Marriage” animates the tales of married couples. The husband and wife tell stories from their perspective. The wife swears the husband wasn’t there when she saw Jackie Kennedy. It’s cute. The second half has a marriage fall apart when the husband’s legal battle completely alienates his wife. It’s not cute. The most moving of the episodes is “John Smith” where the lives of numerous John Smiths at different ages are spliced together to create the life of one John Smith. It’s creative and inspiring. The newborn John Smith hasn’t done that much. The big bonus feature for this release is This American Life Live! The 77 minute event ran in theaters across America. Ira gets to mix the audio live on stage. They feature segments from the upcoming second season along with a few things that didn’t make the cut. If you couldn’t make it to the theater that day, you can now enjoy Ira Glass in your living room.

Mystery Science Theater 3000: Volume XV brings another four titles of the award winning Comedy Central program from the Satellite of Love to your house. The folks at Best Brains worked hard on this batch since they include the most painful excuses for cinema. Racket Girls is about pro women’s wrestling in 1951. The women aren’t close to the hotties that grappled on GLOW. They spend most of their time in the ring swapping headlocks. The “action” in Racket Girls might cause you to pass out from a sleeper hold plot. Mike Nelson and the robots have to do three times the work to keep up the funny. “Zombie Nightmare” gets saved by the casting of Adam West and a really young Tia Carrere (Wayne’s World). A dead baseball player returns as a zombie to destroy Tia and her friends. They put him in the grave. West has to solve this supernatural thriller. The bonus features include a recent interview with the zombie actor and the actor who formed a lifelong bond with Adam West. “The Girl In Lover’s Lane” gives us riding the rails action. There’s not as much action as craved in a tale of drifters. Luckily Joel and the Robots bring the wisecracks that pep up the plot. “The Robot Vs. The Aztec Mummy” is a prime piece of goofiness from Mexico. Who knew robots could battle the undead? This was from the first season on Comedy Channel when Josh Weinstein played Tom Servo and Dr. Laurence Erhardt. The Satellite of Love gets invade by demon dogs. For folks who really want to go old school, there’s segments from their first season on KTMA in Minnesota. They were below Lo-Fi that season. The next installment will come out Dec. 1 with The Corpse Vanishes, Warrior of the Lost World, Santa Claus and Night of the Blood Beast.

Love Boat: Season Two, Volume Two allows your brain to take an ocean cruise vacation. The funniest moment of the dozen episodes is Sonny Bono playing Deacon Dark. With his face painted kabuki-style and a python around his shoulders, he’s a cross between Alice Cooper and Kiss. His lounge performance deserves to be played during any “Metal Years” documentary. Sonny drops his schtick when a deaf girl inspires him to become the next Paul Williams. Arte Johnson is his serious manager. What’s interesting is that both Bono and Gopher (Fred Grandy) would end up as Congressmen. Couldn’t their political opponents use this footage against them? Charo makes a return appearance, but now she a star of the Pacific Princess lounge. She sings the “Love Boat” theme as her show’s big highlight. Hollywood Squares‘ host Peter Marshall slinks on as a “swinger” who thinks he’s found a new lady to romance while his wife tans by the pool. Match Game host Gene Rayburn woos Fannie Flagg through her smuggled dog. Where was Charles Nelson Reilly? Abe Vigoda and Nancy Walker (director of Can’t Stop the Music) hook up. Who saw that coming? Raymond Burr stumbles aboard as a drunk high school drama teacher. Love Boat keeps up the mindless romantic fun. Don’t watch without a few Isaac (Ted Lange) level cocktails.

Parker Lewis Can’t Lose: The Complete First Season brings Corin Nemec’s dream to the shiny discs. Corin had told the Party Favors that he was working with Shout! Factory to get the series released. And now it’s here. The show has Parker Lewis as the coolest guy in school with the freshest of early ’90s fashions. He worked all the angles at a high school. He’s kinda like Damone from Fast Times At Ridgemont High except with high tech help. The pilot episode has Milla Jovovich as the girl of his dreams. Turns out she’s also in the dreams of Parker Lewis’ tight buds. Sadly enough she did not get the gig as a regular. “Operation Kubiac” lets the huge football stud (E.R.‘s Abraham Benrubi) getting recruited. Parker wants a piece of the action by becoming an agent. However his math makes him college poison. “Jerry: Portrait of a Video Junkie” brings back Jerry Mathers and Barbara Billingsley from Leave It To Beaver. Kids got hooked to video games before wii. Ozzy Osbourne and Donny Osmond appeared this season, but not on the same episodes. The pacing, action and effects seems to have set the stage for Scrubs. Parker Lewis is so much better a student and pal than Ferris Bueller. Parker Lewis Can’t Lose is too smart for homeroom. The 26 episodes are spread over 4 DVDs. There’s only two more season to go.

Peyton Place: Part Two has another 33 episodes from America’s favorite tawdry small town. With the death of Farrah Fawcett, we’ve seen a lot of Ryan O’Neal on TV. Peyton Place is where he got his start as the misguided lover who has a thing for Mia Farrow. His real wife has split for Manhattan where she’s about to take up a career as a hooker. Mia’s real father has been released from prison. Except she doesn’t know that Tim O’Connor is her biological dad. He’s promised her mother to keep it a secret. But he needs to unveil the real killer who sent him to prison. A local insurance salesman goes nuts when his business fails. He plans on making a few people cash in their policy with the Colt .45 clause. It’s not a peaceful town. No matter how simple you think things are, they always get complicated on this primetime soap opera from 1965.

TRIBBLES!

July 28, 2009
Party Favors: Gary Cole Interview

TALLADEGA — When a filmmaker wants to depict America’s legendary rugby coach in a film, only a legend actor can handle the job. Forever Strong shines a light on Highland High’s Coach Larry Gelwix. How good is he? His teams are 361-9 in the last three decades. He’s brought 18 of the last 24 National High School titles back to Salt Lake City. Who could dramatically play such an imposing figure behind such figures? Gary Cole took the whistle.

The star of Pineapple Express and Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby dialed up the Party Favors hotline to discuss his role in Forever Strong which has recently been released on DVD. Oddly enough, the star of Midnight Caller rang me in the afternoon.

Being in the right place at the right time was the key to Cole landing the role of Coach Gelwix.

“I was in Salt Lake City in the summer of 2006 making a baseball movie (American Pasttime) when Forever Strong was being prepped and set to go,” Cole said. “I got a call barely two weeks before they were set to shoot. They had the rugby guys in bootcamp for five weeks. I got the call and switched my bags from one hotel to another.”

With such a short time, how did Cole tap into playing a real life figure?

“I got the script and I was able to meet with Larry (Gelwix). We talked about the team and his experiences,” Cole said. “Far as the rugby was concerned, he was around all the time. We just went on the fly. It wasn’t like I had two months to bone up on my rugby knowledge – which is still limited. It’s kinda of a difficult game to grasp.”

After this experience, was Cole inspired to coach a rec league rugby team?

“I would say no,” Cole declared. “I’ve played a lot of coaches. If it’s a sport you know, you can throw semi-intelligent ad libs from the sidelines because you know the game.” However rugby didn’t fit into the tested coach cliches since there’s no forward passes. “We were always dumbfounded. What should we be saying other than ‘go faster!’ Most of the time you couldn’t hear us and we were shouting out showtunes to crack each other up. They just needed some kind of syllables.”

There are very little signal calling action for the coaches during the game. The nature of the action ended up dictating the game action captured on film.

“There’s very little Xs and Os. It’s dictated by the movement of the ball. It’s pretty improvisational,” Cole said. This improv nature of the game became a part of filming the action on the filed. “They just let them play a lot of times. There were scripted things that had to happen in terms of story. But a lot of times they put the camera on a length of track and just let them play.”

Rugby is known for its brutal action with lack of pads and helmets. The slogan “give blood, play rugby” is truth. How much bloodshed was there on the field during the shoot? Was there a disabled list on the call sheet?

“Nothing that took anybody out like ‘Oh God, here we go. We got to shut it down. Sean (Faris) earned his money. He had to take most of the shots and they were in the scripts. They were headhunting him and he was the ball carrier. He got his share of bruises, fingers dislodged and a couple of groin pulls here and there. He took plenty of Advil and abuse,” Cole said.

Even though he didn’t have to take the physical abuse, Cole suffered for the shoot.

“It was the middle of summer in Salt Lake City,” Cole said. “It was 102 degrees. The coaches hardest job was finding shade on the sidelines and sipping our Gatorade.”

We discussed the unusual nature of a movie about the ultimate overdog. Sports movies are always about the scrappy underdog going against the well oiled machine. Whether it be Rocky, The Bad News Bears or the 1980 US hockey team; the big dog is meant to be taken down in these films. How did Cole work his version of Gelwik so that he wasn’t Vic Morrow? How do you make the audience embrace the winner who always wins?

“I think (the movie) had less to do with the success of the team as it did with why and how they’re a success. His methods more than winning and losing,” Cole said. “The story isn’t centered on him. The center is Sean. It’s seen through his eyes. He’s the one changing more drastically in the movie. Larry, the coach, is there doing what he does and has been doing for a long time.”

There is a Vic Morrow character in the form of Sean’s father played by Neal McDonough. He’s a vicious field coach who hates Gelwik. His anger builds when his troubled son ends up on Highland. Did Cole find the level of his character by balancing his Gelwik off McDonough’s rat bastard coach?

“No. I didn’t base anything I was doing by viewing him when I wasn’t working. We didn’t have all that much to do together. That’s more of a job of the director to balance out,” Cole said.

How does Larry Gelwix measure up to the ultimate coach that Cole has played: Reese Bobby in Talladega Nights?

“They both had different methods, but the results were the same,” Cole declared. “Reese had his own methods. He was pretty one-dimensional in his approach. I don’t think he would have had the patience for a rugby team.”

Would Reese have released a live cougar on the Highland team bus?

“He could have done that, but then there would be a lawsuit. Ricky Bobby wasn’t a minor,” Cole said.

Seeing how Gelwik has only lost 9 games, I ask Cole if he found the coach sensitive about those defeats?

“I don’t know,” Cole admitted. “He’s emotionally an even keel guy. He’s more Phil Jackson and less George Karl.”
?What makes the coach even more amazing of a figure is that this is not his day job. He’s not pulling in the big bucks from Nike.

“He’s a volunteer. He’s a travel agent,” Cole said. “That says something about him and his method as well.”

Gary Cole has been on a great roll over the last decade. As Bill Lumbergh in Office Space, Cole delivered the greatest comic sex scene in motion picture history. He was the Vice President of the United States on The West Wing. But I wondered if people ever got him confused with Gary Collins.

“Gary Collins – no. Gary Coleman – yes,” Cole declared. “I’ve been introduced as Gary Coleman on several occasions.”

Coincidentally, if you type Gary Cole’s name into the imdb, the first actor on the list is Gary Coleman.

His role as Mike Brady in The Brady Bunch Movie was marked a stellar dadfro. Did he hang onto the curly haired wig?

“I did at one time. I think it’s burned up in the atmosphere,” Cole admitted. “The thing about The Brady Bunch is that when I wasn’t on the set, rarely people knew that it was me. You take that hair off, you’re a different person. I didn’t get a lot of association with the movie until later.”

Gary has a massive filmography. Does he ever take a day off?

“I’ve been fairly busy. I’m doing this season of Entourage. There’s plenty of days off. Most of the parts I get are wrapped up in two to three weeks in the course of a two to three month movie,” Cole said.

Besides working live action, Cole has been busy behind the microphone in animated shows including Kim Possible, King of the Hill and Family Guy. His crowning achievement was the lead in Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law. Stephen Colbert voiced Phil Ken Sebben, the owner of the Hanna-Barbera themed legal firm. Did Cole and Colbert rock the microphones at the same time?
“We never did the voices together. We never met until after the show had wrapped. I met him at what turned out to be the last Aspen Comedy Festival. They were doing a tribute to him. Most of the time he was in New York,” Cole said.

Back in the ’80s, Cole was a finalist for the role of Sonny Crockett on Miami Vice. I had to know if he had landed the gig instead of Don Johnson; would Gary Cole have released a rock album?

He laughed for a while. “Highly doubtful,” Cole declared.

In an alternate universe, there isn’t a Rolling Stone magazine cover insisting “Gary Cole: Rock n Roll Star.”

WHY NOT THE SHE-TEAM?

Why exactly are they going to make A-Team into a feature film? Must we watch another batch of actors dress up in Halloween costumes for two hours? Liam Neeson playing Col. Hannibal Smith? He was going to retire from acting after Phantom Menace. Is he really going to get the rejuvenation spark from saying, “I love it when a plan comes together?” The guy would be so much better off just making Banacek: The Movie. Bradley Cooper is supposed to be Face and Common as Mr. T. How sad and predictable. Why not get semi-creative and cast Katee Sackhoff as Face. She’s already proven to be an equal of Dirk Benedict as Starbuck on Battlestar Galactica. Why not let her tackle his other big TV role? Or just cast her as B.A. Baracus? The woman has more attitude than the snoozer cast being floated by Scott Free.

FINALLY

Shutter Island finally brings together the superstar teaming of Martin Scorsese and Jackie Earle Haley. Leonardo DiCaprio better give full respect to the man who perfected the troubled teen persona when junket time rolls around.

BLU-RAY HEAVEN

The Siege Blu-ray gives a new life to a thriller that deserves a second viewing based on its story and amazing list of supporting actors. A decade after its release, this “It can’t happen here” story of radical Islamic terrorists striking New York City is almost a text book of what people have seen happen in the post-9/11 Manhattan. The terrorists are blowing up buses and Broadway theaters to the point where the military takes control of Brooklyn to weed them out. The ending is a bit too optimistic compared to the harsh reality of what happened when they struck in New York City. But it is rather good at foreshadowing the nature of the enemy we’ve been fighting for the last 8 years. While the film stars Denzel Washington, Annette Bening and Bruce Willis, it’s the faces that have become familiar over the last decade that make this movie more surprising than a backpack of C-4. Denzel’s main FBI man is Tony Shalhoub (Monk). The Daily Show‘s Aasif Mandvi is tied in with the terrorists. Also in minor roles are Lance Reddick (The Wire and Fringe), David Proval (The Sopranos) and Mark Valley (Keen Eddie). The Blu-ray brings out the explosions detail. The battle of Brooklyn is exceptionally vivid in the format. There are no bonus features which is a shame since it’d be nice to have terrorism experts pondering if this was a vision of the future.

Predator 2 – Blu-ray brings an intergalactic hunter out of the jungle and into Los Angeles. What’s the best way to stop the carnage? Have him sign a development deal with Pax-TV. Danny Glover is the cop who finds himself the target of the semi-visible target. The movie doesn’t have the complete punch of The Predator. But it’s fascinating to see the alien killing machine wrecking the urban jungle as he looks for the most dangerous game in Hollywood. The high definition picture makes the alien effects glow. The strange thrill will come from seeing Morton Downey Jr. in 1080p. The bonus features give a sense of what the writers and director went through to bring this sequel to the city.

Lost: The Complete First Season – Blu-ray and Lost: The Complete Second Season – Blu-ray give the 1080p love to one of the most complex network TV shows since The Prisoner. The Complete First Season jolts everything as Oceanic flight 815 crashes onto an uncharted island. The passengers learn quickly to survive as they realize there’s little hope for a quick rescue. Each episode allows us to explore the various survivors as they explore the mysterious island. What is the deal with polar bears in the tropics? What is the force that drags people into holes? Why did John Locke (Terry O’Quinn) become such a survivalist stud even though he had an issue before takeoff. What are “The Others” that lurk on the island? It’s a frightening time around the campfire. And with the higher resolutions, you’ll be scared by things that go bump in the jungle. The big cliffhanger has them bust into a mysterious metal hatch. What’s down there? The Complete Second Season answers the hatch question with startling results. Not to spoil the fun, but Clancy Brown (Highlander) plays a startling guest role. He will remind you to push the button or else. Another big thing is a flashback that allows us to discover what happened to the Oceanic passengers that got stuck at the back of the plane. The passengers at the front finally encounter the Others. It ain’t a good meetin. The hi-def video quality is stunning on the big screen. The lush tropical nature of the show will make you sweat if you marathon the episodes. You can reach out and touch Matthew Fox’s beard. These first two seasons help set up the weirdness that would come. In case you’re wondering, next season will have the final 17 episodes. Time to catch up before the TV event of 2010 strikes when everything gets answered. For those pondering upgrading your original DVDs, there is a $20 rebate on each boxset. This is a geek out recommend.

Home – Blu-ray is a lush aerial documentary of the Earth. Yann Arthus-Bertrand takes his camera around the globe to let us see what’s going on. Besides the artistry of these bird’s eye views, the movie reminds us that our actions do have reactions. Many of them aren’t that pretty. Glenn Close narrates the footage. If you like to watch Baraka after a few refreshments, Home deserves a spot on your Blu-ray shelf.

Friday 13th, Part 2 – Blu-ray gets the upgrade action. The film starts off with the final showdown between what we think is Jason and Alice Hardy (Adrienne King). Watch the high definition picture, the entire opening scene really does make little sense. Who is the killer and who is the victim? It’s a really disjointed opening scene. The main story has Camp Crystal Lake reopening with a whole new batch of eager camp counselors. Do these kids not understand what happened to the last batch? Maybe it has been five years, but they’re going to get it. Why? Cause Jason is back although he hasn’t started wearing his hockey mask. He goes crazy with the new staff. Who will live to tell the tale? There’s quite a few fun bonus features for fans wanting to know more about this low budget slasher series that made a major profit at the box office. They even take us to a horror convention to get a sense of the film’s fans.

Friday 13th, Part 3 3-D- Blu-ray really lets you absorb the coming at you action versus the recent DVD release. If you’ve decided to buy the 70 inch widescreen set versus sending the kids to Harvard, prepare to jump behind the sofa. Jason is coming for you. And they’ll be coming for your friend since there’s two set of 3-D glasses in the plastic box. The movie has Jason finally move on from slaughtering camp counselors. Now he’s killing people in the area around the camp. It’s so touching when a mindless killing machine branches out. And with the red and blue lensed glasses, you’ll be able be a part of this moment. This is also the film where he dons the hockey goalie mask. “Legacy of the Mask” deals with the mask over the next several films in the series. “Fresh Cuts: 3D Terror” lets us know why the producers decided to make the terror jump out of the screen. The films was such a hit, they ran out of glasses. There’s also a 2-D version of the film for people who don’t want to be super scared. This is the perfect gift if you’re attempting to give someone a case of nightmares for the next summer.

DVD SHELF

Another three Friday 13th installments arrive as Deluxe Editions. You might want to spread some plastic on the floor in front of the TV to keep the blood from staining the carpet.

Friday 13th: The Final Chapter – Deluxe Edition was supposed to wrap up the saga of Jason Voorhees. They brought back make up man Tom Savini to kill off his creation. They even brought in major star power with Crispin Glover and Corey Feldman. Guess who survives? You’re wrong! Really wrong. For what was supposed to be a finale, Jason decides to crash a house party in the woods. Crispin Glover and his pals can’t even find the place. But Jason has no problems locating the residence. He must have used Google Slaughter Earth. Corey Feldman is the creepy kid who lives next to the party house. He’s a lonely dork who loves making monster make up. He’s like a young Tom Savini. During the scenes where Corey gets chased by Jason, it’s easy to think that this would foreshadow his relationship with Michael Jackson. Not to spoil the film, but Jason’s death is extremely gruesome. Damn shame this moment wasn’t shot in 3-D. The big bonus feature is the deleted ending of the film. There’s no soundtrack so it gets described. “Jason’s Unlucky Day” lets the director talk about all the moments that had to get snipped by MPAA orders to get the R rating. It’s more brutal than the action on the screen.

Friday 13th Part V: A New Beginning – Deluxe Edition brings back Corey Feldman for the opening scene. He fears that Jason isn’t really dead. Two dumb jocks dig up a sloppy grave and get slaughtered by the hockey mask wearing killer. Turns out that this might be a dream. In fact it’s been years since Corey Feldman (SPOILER ALERT) had his way with Jason. Now he’s a grown up played by John Shepherd. Trouble is he’s stuck in a nut house. Jason returns from the grave and sends the troubled teens to a violent end. At least we think he has. Someone with a machete and a hockey mask is slashing away. The best victim is the new wave girl with the funky hair and Walkman. “New Beginnings” gives the background on this production. They went out of their way to hide the fact that this was another Friday 13th movie. They didn’t want the fans to think they were ripped off at the death of Jason. You won’t want to watch this first since there’s a montage showing everyone who gets killed in the film. It’s a major spoiler. There’s another installment of “Lost Tales From Camp Blood” and “Crystal Lake Massacres Revisited.” These two shorts are goofy as they ad to the weirdness of Jason’s history.

Friday 13th Part VI: Jason Lives – Deluxe Edition really does revive Jason. Corey Feldman’s character is now played by Thom Matthews. He and a pal dig up Jason’s grave to cremate the body. This plan goes severely wrong. Jason ends up making a major comeback. Hopefully that clue didn’t ruin the truth of Part V. But now Tommy and Jason get to battle once more. Although it’s not as fun since it’s not Corey Feldman being chased around. There’s more killing and carnage. Do not mistake this DVD for the Baby Einstein series. The DVD contains various scenes that were slashed to get the R-rating. Why couldn’t Tommy just let Jason rot in his grave?

All three boxes have cool 3-D graphics on the covers. They’re perfect for decorating your veal pen.

June 24, 2009
Party Favors: Jo Koy Interview

KANSAS CITY – Jo Koy’s cellphone was calling me.

The stand up comedian’s excited that his first hour long Comedy Central special is now out on DVD. Jo Koy: Don’t Make Him Angry gives the uncensored version of tales about Michael Phelps, his son’s ting-ting and his mom playing Wii.

Before we discussed the funny, there was the matter of people thinking he was saying “Joe Corey” on his Amp’d Mobile ad. It was more confusing since we have matching haircuts. He was not playing me in the pool hall. He wanted to know if other people messed up my name like his.

“Whenever I go to get a reservation they go, ‘Your first name is Joy?’” Koy said.

The most embarrassing butchering of his name came at the hands of a former Fox News employee.

“I was doing an industry showcase in LA. Dom Irrera was the host. This is the first time I get to LA. The networks are in the audience to watch. He goes up to do my intro, ‘This next gal, I’ve worked with her several time. She’s hilarious. You’re going to love her. Put your hands together for Joy Koy!’” Jo had to burn one of his precious minutes explaining to the folks that he wasn’t a girl.

Luckily Koy’s career wasn’t destroyed by Dom’s gaf. He graduated from a doing a Comedy Central Presents half hour special to a full fledged hour long show. Here’s a clip from Don’t Make Him Angry with Koy talking about Michael Phelps:

Jokes.com

Jo Koy – Swimming

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Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

What’s remarkable is the background image of Koy’s crying son isn’t a projected photograph. It’s a giant mobile hanging from above. Bruce Ryan was responsible for this wicked good piece of stagecraft.

“What’s crazy is that each individual piece had weights on them so they would sit perfectly and wouldn’t sway if wind hit them. The guy is a genius. Bruce Ryan does the big sets for everybody,” Koy explained. Ryan created the sets for Larry the Cable Guy, Jeff Dunham, Kathy Griffin and AFI’s Tributes to George Lucas. “We were blessed to have him. He didn’t tell us what he was going to do until the day of the show. I looked up and I teared up. It was so beautiful.”

The piece was too huge for Koy to take back to his place. Even after all these months, it still pangs him that he couldn’t save it. Who wouldn’t want a 20 ft high sculpture of your kid to show off to family and friends? He confessed how he wished he’s just taken one piece.

Koy is really close to his son and taps the child for several of his best routines. He still remembers the delivery room. “That was the best moment of my life,” he said. “Seeing that baby being born. So amazing even though I threw up.”

Koy merely gushed when it came to talking about director Troy Miller’s work on Don’t Make Him Angry. “The way he shot it was awesome. It has a different look than most one hour specials. He went above and beyond also.”

The DVD also includes Koy’s first half hour Comedy Central Presents that was done last year. What was the difference in making the step up to the big show? “When you’re doing an hour, you’re literally doing an hour and thirty minutes,” Koy said. “That way they have enough material to go to. I had to write a longer set. I had to do two tapings in one night. It was pretty much three hours that I did on stage. What’s crazy was we had a technical difficulty in the first show. We couldn’t even use any of the material from the first taping. The whole DVD is the performance I did that night.”

What technical glitch happened to zilch the early show? Did someone forget to press record on the tape deck? Did the front row consist of CIA undercover agents?

“We had no air conditioning,” Koy confessed. “I was sweating profusely. It was bad. I had that silver jacket on so you could see big sweat spots starting to grow. We couldn’t use it because it wouldn’t match. During the second show we still didn’t have an air conditioning unit. At the end of every joke, I was basically stopping. I’d apologize to the crowd. We’d have to do make up and wipe the sweat off my face between each joke. Then I’d start back up again.”

Unlike Madonna, he didn’t rush off stage for the touch up. He never lost sight of the audience. “I was joking and interacting with them in between,” Koy said. If you were in the audience that night, he still thinks highly of you.

You’ve already seen the first half of his routine about Olympic champion Michael Phelps. The routine gets a little darker in the second half. How do the crowds react to him talking about Phelps without his swimcap?

“They love it,” Koy confirmed. “I go on the road and people request it. I don’t do that hour at all. I don’t touch any of those jokes anymore. Last night people were yelling out ‘Michael Phelps!” And ‘Wii!’ My mom playing the wii. They scream that out loud and I have to do it for these people. It’s awesome. I love it. I never had a request before.”

We had a joke about how if Michael Phelps had been photographed eating pot brownies, he could have received a Duncan Hines endorsement instead of apologizing to the people of China.

Here’s a little bit of Jo talking about his mom while she’s in the audience:

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Jo Koy – P’s and F’s

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Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

“My mom keeps giving me material without knowing that she’s giving me material,” Koy said. “She gets joy every time I go up on stage and have a story about her. She’s a ham, as you can tell.”

We joke about between his son and his mom, he ought to have a reality show on Bravo.

“I shot a pilot with Comedy Central which didn’t get picked up,” Koy said. “Now we’re moving along. I would love to shoot a pilot again based on me and my son.”

Like myself, Jo Coy is also disgusted that “Joe the Plumber” is really a guy named Sam. People that aren’t a first name Joe aren’t really Joes. “This is a classic name,” Koy said. “Don’t mess it up.”

With Jay Leno going to 10 p.m. next season, will there be even more opportunities for stand up comics with all the talkshows needing talent?

“I can’t wait to do Jay Leno again,” Koy said. “What a great talkshow to be on. That guy is nothing, but class. I love Jay. The Tonight Show changed my life completely. I did Kimmel and Carson Daly, but when I did The Tonight Show it was something special. Jay came into my dressing room and spent thirty minutes with my mom, dad, sister and me. He’s a class act. Him and Craig Ferguson are the two guys I admire a lot in the talk show world.”

His first visit with Leno got even better after the show wrapped up. “At the end of the show they do the local drops. He pre-tapes those and keeps the audience there. I’m standing next to Jay Leno. He did four station IDs. When he was done, he looked out in the crowd and said, ‘Where’s Jo Koy’s parents at?” My dad raises his hand. Jay says, ‘Come down. I want to take a picture of you and your son on my stage.’ It was so classy.”

Another show he enjoy is Chelsea Lately on E! He’s been a regular guest on the opening roundtable segment. “I’m pretty much a fixture there and I love it. She’s done so much for my career. She’s really giving and sweet. I want to pay it forward just like her.” And when it comes to her sidekick Chuy Bravo? “I love that guy. He takes those punches so good.”

Koy got his start in Las Vegas. We joked about the badness Criss Angel’s show at the Luxor. We got a little too ghastly with talk about the potential future home of the Jo Koy theater. He gave his recommendation for food in Sin City. “The best place for late night steaks is the Rio.”

When he was working out his material for Don’t Get Him Angry, did Koy work on the language to figure out what moments would work best when bleeped so people would be really interested into getting the uncensored DVD?

“The beautiful thing about the hour is that you get to go up and be yourself and (Comedy Central) has to deal with the bleeping,” Koy said. “It doesn’t take you out of your routine. I’m on the road every day of the week. I’m doing club style comedy. To prepare for my hour special I was one the road for eight months working on my set. I was writing jokes for the hour, but I still have to perform for these people who are coming out to see me.”

What’s always interesting about a comic how they have to constantly be updating their material. Once a comic gets a routine just right, they have to dump it. Don’t expect Koy to perform all the jokes on Don’ t Make Him Angry when he comes to your town in the next few months.

“That’s why people don’t understand how hard it to do stand up,” Koy said. “Writing a joke is equivalent to writing a song. It’s just as hard to work out the kinks and make sure it’s hilariously funny. It takes a while for each joke to develop and work out. Unfortunately when we finally get it on DVD, we have to retire it. Or when it’s on TV, we have to drop it. Otherwise people think you’re doing the same material all the time. It’s unfortunate, but that’s part of the game. A singer writes a song and can milk it for 25 years. We can’t do the classics. It sucks cause there’s a few jokes that I didn’t get to do on the road. I never really got to perform that Michael Phelps joke anywhere. That joke came right after the Olympics.”

There is one exception to the retirement rule.

“If they request it; let’s do it. But it’s a double edged sword for a comedian,” Koy said. “If I go up and do it, the crowd is like, ‘He’s just doing the stuff from the DVD.’ But if you don’t do it, the crowd says, ‘Why didn’t you do any of the stuff from the DVD?’ What do you guys want from me?”

Koy understands the ultimate reason that he needs to keep updating his material. “I don’t want be at the end of my set talking about my three year old and someone comes up to me and goes, ‘Isn’t your son six and a half now?’”

If you want to see Jo Koy talk about his son’s Ting-Ting while the kid is still young, visit his website at:

www.jokoy.com

REVENGE TIME?

Anyone else suspect that the recent rash of hatred against Craigslist is being funded by big newspaper publishers wanting us to return to their “safe” classified pages? There’s such a rabid exploitation of any news story dealing with someone using Craigslist.

TRUMP SCAM

How can this season of Donald Trump’s Celebrity Apprentice not be viewed as fixed? Joan Rivers was a worthless mess on a majority of the episodes, but Trump refused to fire her. Did it have something to do with Joan’s charity being God’s Love We Deliver? Joan likes to call it a small, little known charity. Except it’s not that unknown in the world of Donald Trump since Blaine Trump, his sister-in-law, sits on the Board of Directors of God’s Love We Deliver.

Donald Trump funneled $532,000 of NBC’s money to a relative’s charity without admitting his connection. How could Annie Duke have a chance to win? She was dead meat in that boardroom. The network didn’t let us know that the judge had a rooting interest in this decision. I would normally say that this is against the game show laws, but there’s no real game in this show, Trump can do what he wants without preset rules and conditions. He doesn’t have to be consistent or make sense. He got rid of a Kardashian because he won’t tolerate people with a drunk driving conviction. Yet he allowed Dennis Rodman to stick around even though the Worm had also been nailed for drunk driving. Where’s the justice?

The bigger scandal is why NBC had to give this show three hours for its finale. Couldn’t they have cut it in half and started the Today Show early?

BOND BLU-RAY

Another two James Bond classics are out on Blu-ray this month. Time to break out my martini glasses to enjoy 007 in 1080p.

The Man With The Golden Gun takes the Roger Moore Bond to the Far East. He’s in pursuit of a notorious hitman played by Christopher Lee. How will the secret agent do against a man who played Dracula in the Hammer Films? Lee gets a little help from Herve Villechaize (Tattoo from Fantasy Island). Bond gets stuck with a ditzy agent, Britt Ekland (The Wicker Man) so he’s out manned. The film does have quite a few exciting scenes including a spiral car leap off twisted bridge. Christopher Lee turns his car into an airplane with a few handy accessories. Unlike today’s CGI effects, they really did get that car to fly. All the bonus features from the Ultimate Edition have been brought over. The transfer image brings out the beauty of the Asian location. The Phuket islands in Thailand look like a high quality travel poster on the screen. And you’ll want to be able to see Britt Ekland and Maud Adams in extreme resolution as they wander around Lee’s lair in bikinis.

Licence to Kill was Timothy Dalton’s second and final outing as Bond. They wanted to make a harder Bond than the glib Roger Moore persona. While this film isn’t as intense as Daniel Craig’s Bond, Dalton wasn’t a happy go lucky agent. The cut on the Blu-ray contains the moments snipped after the MPAA rated the film with an R back in ’89. The film has Robert Davi (the creepy stripclub owner in Showgirls) as a Latin American drug kingpin. Bond and Felix Leiter (David Hedison) bust the guy right before Felix’s wedding. The honeymoon goes bad when Davi escapes and gives Felix a really bad wedding gift. Bond is bent on revenge, but M wants him off the case. Bond resigns from MI6 so he can keep up his pursuit. His only help is Carey Lowell and Davi’s abused girlfriend. Davi’s main muscle is a very young Benicio Del Toro. Injecting a little humor to the film is Wayne Newton as a televangelist. The high definition transfer makes the shark torture scene more intense than the pan and scan run on cable. The bonus features include a breakdown of how they made the tanker trucks for the big stunt sequence. You also get two really cheesy ’80s videos from Gladys Knight and Patti LaBelle. If you’ve upgraded your home entertainment system, make sure you’ve upgraded your Bonds.

DVD SHELF

Man Hunt is our Ray Regis pick of the week. In the wake of Tarantino’s World War II fantasy called Inglourious Basterds, Fox has finally put out Fritz Lang’s own fictional plot against Hitler that was released in 1941. Walter Pidgeon has a clear shot at Hitler during a hunting trip in Bavaria. He’s captured by Hitler’s guards. They torture him in hopes of getting a confession that he is a British agent on a mission. Can he withstand the enhanced interrogation techniques? What would happen if he does as told? This was pre-World War II so plenty hangs in the balance for Pidgeon to resist. Can he escape before he becomes another victim of the Third Reich? The movie is a tight thriller for its time. Patrick McGilligan contributes a commentary track. He wrote Fritz Lang: The Nature of the Beast so he’s giving plenty of details instead of describing what we’re seeing. He lets us know the guy playing Hitler had already put on the mustache for Citizen Kane. The late film archivist Ray Regis was really excited to screen Man Hunt a few years back. I know he’d be pleased by the excellent black and white transfer on this DVD. Before you see Basterds, witness how Fritz Lang threatened Hitler while the Fuhrer was alive.

Pufnstuf is the winner of the DVD that requires you to be baked. The big screen musical adaptation of the Saturday morning H.R. Pufnstuf. This was the first major freakishness from Sid and Mary Krofft. A little boy is kidnapped by a witch who wants his magic flute. His only help is a giant lizard in little white cowboy boots. Can he get his flute back? Why is everything on Living Island alive? How do they eat without fruit screaming? Will Mama Cass sing more songs? This film is not made to be watched while sober. Only bonus feature is the trailer.

May 27, 2009
Party Favors: Chazz Palminteri Interview

STATEN ISLAND – Fifteen years after making a major name for himself in A Bronx Tale, Chazz Palminteri has conquered another New York title in Yonkers Joe. He’s a hustler who lurks at low level gambling functions fixing Poker and dice games with his slimy crew. He doesn’t believe in chance when he can sneak a pair of loaded bones into his hands. His life gets complicated when he’s forced to take care of his teenage son, Joe Jr. (Tom Guiry). The son has Down Syndrome so he’s not as controllable as a marked deck of cards in Yonkers Joe’s hands. He’s got to make a big score to support the kid.

Chazz Palminteri called up the Party Favors hotline to discuss Yonkers Joe. The movie has just been released on DVD by Magnolia Home Entertainment. He’s a soft spoken guy over the phone.

What attracted him to the role of a man who wasn’t a gambler, but a pure cheater?

“It’s really a guy who is like a magician with his hands,” Chazz said. “These types of guys came out of World War II. They didn’t have jobs so a lot of them became hustlers. They started learning this trade. They were a sub-culture. They weren’t robbing Las Vegas. They were going around to dice games and clam bakes.”

Had Chazz ever been victimized by these hustlers at friendly Poker games? “If I did, I wouldn’t know about it,” Chazz declared.

Unlike the Poker players that have become superstars thanks to ESPN and NBC, the cheaters can’t be so high profile. Chazz was drawn to this element of gamblers who can’t brag about their feats. “The interesting thing about these guys is that they live these lives by themselves. They can’t tell anyone what they do. If they do, they’ll be killed.”

The third act of the film has Yonkers Joe conceiving an amazing way to cheat in a casino. The big scam was shot at the Plaza Hotel and Casino on Las Vegas’s Fremont Street. You might know this location from Cool World. What did the real hotel security think of the scheme?

“They thought it was incredible,” Chazz said. “They thought it was a pretty amazing how the writer thought up the scheme.” Now that it’s been exposed in Yonkers Joe, can a cheat pull it off without the eyes in the sky catching them? “It would be tough. You take some licenses in movies. Can some of these things work? The dice thing could work. But it’s still risky.” Chazz does not recommend you losing a hand to Cheater’s justice. It’s always best to gamble according to the house rules.

Besides acting, Chazz was an executive producer for Yonkers Joe. He helped in selecting the talent. “I like working with certain people,” Chazz said. “I’d talk with the director and he’d ask me what I’d think about certain people. I really liked working with Christine Lahti. I directed her in a movie called Women Vs. Men. It’s a great feeling when you can just look at an actor and direct them. You kinda tell them what you want and they just do it. You don’t have to explain.”

The toughest work in the film belonged to Tom Guiry in the role of Joe Jr. He had to pull off the physicality of the son with Down Syndrome. He was recently on NBC’s Kings and The Black Donnellys. He spent months living with a family with a Down Syndrome child to understand the character. The research paid off according to his co-star.

“I thought he did a great job,” Chazz said. “That’s one of those roles that if you don’t do your homework, you come off looking like a cheap suit. A lot of people thought he really was that way.” Did Guiry’s ability to look realistic in the role help Chazz get into his role? “Yeah. He made my job easier by doing such a great job.”

The movie takes Yonkers Joe from Atlantic City to Las Vegas. What does Chazz think is the difference between these two gambling capitals? “In Las Vegas, it’s about the shows and the gambling. In Atlantic City, it’s just the gambling part. Vegas is showy. The glitz is not there in Atlantic City. In Vegas, it’s all about the glitz.”

Chazz will be bringing a little glitz to the land of Monopoly when he performs his A Bronx Tale on Atlantic City’s Harrah’s stage from July 1 to August 9. He’s also going to be doing it in the fall in Las Vegas. This one man show elevated his career. “This is what Robert De Niro saw,” he said. De Niro decided to make the play his directorial debut. Not only did he have Chazz write the script, but co-star with De Niro. Robert was the good dad while Chazz played the mobster fighting for the soul of the kid. How hard was the adaptation process from stage to screen?

“If you saw the show, you’ll see that I did the movie on stage,” Chazz said.

The script is the most important part of why he accepts a project. In the case of Yonkers Joe, writer-director Robert Celestino got the script to Chazz’s agent. The actor laid out the process that gets him excited about a project.

“I read the script first then look at my part. If my part is good and it’s a great story; I say let’s meet the director. I meet the director and ask who else is in it. If that’s good than we have a shot for something good to happen. A shot…doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to happen. But at least if you’re happy with all those elements, you have a good chance to make a good movie.

“The script has to be good. You can’t make chicken salad out of shit. You got to have a good script.” But what happens if a script isn’t great? “Usually the agent knows if it’s bad. He’ll say, ‘Look, the script ain’t great, but they’re offering you a ton of money.’ Then you have to decide.”

Chazz does improve scripts that aren’t quite up to snuff. “I get paid to ghost write.” He still works on original scripts. “The writing is harder because you have to have time to sit down and do it.” Being a busy actor does cut into the alone time.

After A Bronx Tale, Chazz was cast in Woody Allen’s Bullets Over Broadway. His role as a mobster who rewrites a play earned him an Oscar nomination and an Indie Spirit Award. Chazz appreciated working with Woody Allen. “He is hands off,” Chazz described. “He knows what he wrote and he casts the right people. That’s it. You just do it.”

Perhaps the strangest thing about Chazz’s long list of productions is two things that you’d expect on his filmography. While he’s worked with Robert De Niro on a few projects, he’s never been directed by Martin Scorsese. “I haven’t,” he admitted. “I want to, but I haven’t. I know him, but I haven’t.” Perhaps the upcoming Frank Sinatra bio-pic will finally team him up with Scorsese.

Another oddity is that he didn’t appear in The Sopranos. Did he deliberately avoid being cast on the show? “I don’t think so,” Chazz said. “I think it’s just one of those things. I think there’s only two Italian actors that weren’t in The Sopranos: me and John Turturro.”

As our conversation wrapped up, we came back to Yonkers Joe. “What’s really nice in the film is that we stay away from the cliches,” Chazz said. “At the end of the film he says, “Dad, I love you” a few times. I don’t say I love you back. A few people commented on that. How come I didn’t say, “I love you back?” Because you saw it. This guy, who had lived his life as a stranger to everyone, is just finally starting to get there. He’ll get there.”

DRATS DISNEY

Bad news always travels fast and there’s nothing worse than hearing “NO!” over the mouse hotline. Recently Disney wanted a new show to teach the counting and numbers to kiddies. We came up with Roscoe the Pimpopotamus. The colorful large animal in bright suits instructed toddlers on counting to 20. The Disney snobs had an objection to the scene where a pre-schooler passed off 16 as 20. Roscoe cut him 4 times to illustrate the difference. Our production got slashed. These educational people are so ignorant when it comes to giving a lesson that won’t be forgotten. Children need to learn the consequences of bad math skills.

THAT VOICE

As much as I want to watch Pitchmen, I’m not willing to risk my marriage. The wife barely take Billy Mays’ voice for a minute. Asking her to sit through an hour of the show is not an option. This means my only shot for watching episodes is the 1 a.m. repeat. I have to wear headphones for fear that Billy Mays’ voice will wake her up. Propane gas leaks are less overwhelming than him.

The addictive nature of the show is seeing the upcoming product line from “As Seen On TV.” Where is the Pocket Crab Repeller? It was amazing to see Billy Mays chumming the water while Anthony Sullivan tests out a shark be-gone device.

FOR YOU CONSIDERATION

If somehow you vote for the Emmys, the Golden Globes or the Mack of the Year awards, please give a little nomination love to Jim Parsons. His role of Sheldon Cooper on The Big Bang Theory is a pure geek comic masterpiece. He’s the offspring of Tony Randall’s Felix on The Odd Couple and Leonard Nimoy’s Spock on Star Trek. Parson’s work will be remembered for decades.

BLU-RAY HEAVEN

Star Trek Motion Picture Trilogy only focuses on what most consider the best of the movie series featuring Kirk, Spock and McCoy. The Wrath of Khan, The Search For Spock and The Voyage Home are bundled here. As pointed out in the review of the Star Trek: The Original Motion Picture Collection, The Wrath of Khan is the best when it comes to the picture quality. The others aren’t bad, but Khan got the major restoration treatment. Even in 1080p, you can’t see Kirk’s toupee weave in the close ups. Plus there is nothing more impressive than Ricardo Montalban’s massive chest in Blu-ray. He’s got Fabio action as he terrorizes Kirk. The Search For Spock has Kirk and Bones attempt to reunite with Spock in an unorthodox pursuit. The Voyage Home brings the crew back to the 1980s in a survival mission involving whales. I was hoping we’d have Kirk being chased around by T.J. Hooker, but there would be no Shatner alternate universe in this time travel plot. Each movie comes with plenty of dedicated bonus features. The best is Shatner pondering if Nimoy kept swearing not to do Spock in order to get his paychecks improved. Or course is Shatner held out, they’d just replace him with Robert Pine. This selection is perfect for folks who aren’t completionists and don’t want to pay for Shatner’s Final Frontier weirdness. Khan looks the best on the big screen. But all three play so nicely together that you’ll swear it’s a real trilogy.

Seth MacFarlane’s Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy – Blu-ray brings the webisode cartoons to your big TV screen. The jokes play like the cutaway moments from MacFarlane’s Family Guy. There’s no framing device for the minute long shorts. You get the title card and then the action for nearly an hour. Because of the blitz rate of the jokes, some of them work better than others. There’s a long piece about what happens to the Coyote when he kills the Roadrunner that’s exceptional. A really gross moment has Fred Flintstone using the toilet. Repeating the fat Jesus sketch will take you off your grandmother’s Christmas card list. A farmer shearing a sheep will make you bust a spleen. Unlike the version shown on the internet, there’s no bleeping or blocking of graphic image. There’s even animated naughty bits including Kermit the Frog’s schlong. This is Seth uncensored. The Blu-ray will give you a resolution better than streaming. The big bonus feature is the star studded premiere party. Ever wonder what it’s like to party with Seth Green and Seth MacFarlane? Here’s your answer.

3 Days of the Condor – Blu-ray is a masterpiece of paranoia. Robert Redford is a CIA agent assigned to an office that reads novels to see if state secrets are being exposed. They’re not a big thing in the agency. He’s a bit of a loose cannon who doesn’t play by the uptight rules of the unit’s director. It’s this attitude that allows him to be the only one in the office not mowed down by a hit squad. He’s fleeing for his life while trying to figure out why Max von Sydow wants to blow him away. The CIA isn’t too much of a help at bringing him in from the cold. His only “help” is an unwilling Faye Dunaway. Of course she warms up after a while since what woman can resist the charms of Redford? 3 Days of the Condor gritty New York look remains stunning in 1080p. The only bonus feature is the original trailer.

THE DVD SHELF

The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance: The Centennial Collection is our Raymond J. Regis Pick of the Week. Jimmy Stewart is a politician who made his career when he shot down Liberty Valance (Lee Marvin). But was he really the gunman? Is his career based on legend? John Wayne plays an important role in the outcome. Vera Miles is Stewart’s wife. This is a great film for it’s ability to show how a Western myth can evolve and elevate the characters. The bonus features illuminate the film’s already legendary status. Peter Bogdanovich does a commentary track which splices in his archival interviews with director John Ford and Jimmy Stewart. There’s a fresh documentary that explores the creation and impact of the film.

El Dorado: The Centennial Collection has John Wayne and director Howard Hawks take another lap around the Wild West. Ed Asner (The Mary Tyler Moore Show) is an evil rancher wanting take control of the town. John Wayne turns down Asner’s offer to fight Robert Mitchum. But Asner won’t back off from his power plays. Wayne has to get involved in this battle to help Michum. They also bring along a very young James Caan to even up the fight. This is just a great badass shoot ’em up with Wayne, Mitchum and Caan dragging out the hardware. The bonus features include a documentary that addresses the final years of Howard Hawk’s career behind the camera. Ed Asner contributes to the commentary track. A.C. Lytes remembers working with John Wayne.

The Mod Squad: Season 2 Volume 2 continues my lust affair with Julie Barnes (Peggy Lipton). She’s part of a groovy undercover police unit with Pete Cochran (Michael Cole) and Linc Hayes (Clarence Williams III). There job is to find out what evil middle aged folks are messing with the kids. “The King of Empty Cups” demonstrates the dangers of shooting speed. A cop’s daughter runs off to be a groupie for Noel Harrison. His Hollywood mansion is a druggie pleasure dome. Can the Mod Squad save her from the dangers of bad message rock? “Survival House” brings back Sammy Davis Jr. However he’s not the priest from season one. He’s a half-way house guy getting his life back on track. “Return to Darkness, Return to Light” brings back the blind woman that Linc protected in the first season. She invites him over for a party. He gets a shock to discover she’s engaged to Ivan Dixon (Hogan’s Heroes). What happens with Linc meets Kinch? The season finale is more star studded than a Love Boat. The Squad ends up with Martin Sheen, Marion Ross (Happy Days), Harold Gould (Rhoda) and David Cassidy (The Partridge Family) in “The Loser.” The series is the coolest cop show ever.

Gunsmoke: The Third Season, Volume 2 is 20 episodes of Dodge City action when the series was still a half hour long in black and white. “Sunday Supplement” has Werner Klemperer (Hogan’s Heroes‘ Col. Klink) as a reporter starting an Indian revolt in order to get a scoop. “The Cabin” is a trip with Harry Dean Stanton (Big Love) and Claude Akins (Sheriff Lobo) as two loco bandits. Matt Dillon (James Arness) takes shelter with them in the middle of a snow storm. “Dooley Surrenders” stars Strother Martin (The Wild Bunch in the title role. He’s a hide skinner who thinks he might have killed someone during a drinking bender. “The Gentleman” has Jack Cassidy (David Cassidy’s dad) protecting Miss Kitty from Timothy Carey (Paths of Glory). This is another great batch of Westerns guaranteed to keep your father on the sofa during Saturday afternoon. The bonus is feature is the original L&M Cigarette ad.

Eden Log is a really creepy SciFi film from France. This is like Resident Evil without being too viewer friendly. You have no idea what’s going on as Clovis Cornillac awakens in a mucky mess. What is the situation in this post apocalyptic subterranean world? Who are the people chasing him? What are the strange noises in the dark? Who is the girl? This is like a video game come to life without the cute single shooter moments. Under no circumstances should you watch this film with the guy who always asks, “What’s going on?” Eden Log is a tense and confusing futuristic pursuit.

Action Packed gives the pilot episodes of Mission: Impossible, MacGyver, Walker Texas Ranger and NCIS. Walker Texas Ranger spends more time kicking ass than giving us a true representation of police work in the Lone Star State. Chuck Norris is the man with the badge who doesn’t mind letting his boots do the heavy work. The pilot film has him getting revenge on the robbery crew that took out his buddy. Mission: Impossible has Wally Cox (Mr. Peepers) appear as a safe cracker. The crew must swipe a set of nukes. Remember that the first season has Steven Hill running the show. It wouldn’t be till the next go around that Peter Graves accepted the mission. MacGyver goes underground to rescue scientists. He makes up some special devices to save the day. NCIS starts with a case at the top when a man is poisoned to death while eating with the president on Air Force One. It’s cool to see David McCallum (Man From UNCLE) back on the case.

Forever Funny offers the pilot episodes of The Honeymooners, I Love Lucy, Frasier, The Brady Bunch, Taxi and Cheers. This is a fun night of how memorable sitcoms kicked off. The Odd Couple‘s “The Laundry Orgy” reunites us with the actresses that played the Pigeon sisters on the big screen. Jack Klugman and Tony Randall owned their roles instead of merely dressing up as Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon. Cheers reminds us that it all started when Diane dropped by the bar with an ill-fated romance. The big problem with this set is that the producers didn’t notice that the audio on The Honeymooners‘s “TV or Not TV” is horrible. You’ll have to crank it up all the way. The other 38 episodes on the complete boxset have better levels. The only sitcom that isn’t available completely on DVD is Taxi. They need to finish up this show soon. In these troubled times, we need more Tony Danza.

The Best of Star Trek The Original Series is the perfect sampler for anyone who enjoyed the new Star Trek movie, but haven’t experienced William Shatner as Captain Kirk. The four episodes on this compilation are prime choices. “The City on the Edge of Forever” has Dr. McCoy overdosing on a drug and turning into a madman. He passes through a time traveling portal and alters the course of Earth’s history. It’s up to Kirk and Spock to follow him into the past to put history right. An almost young Joan Collins is a woman running a mission in the Great Depression. Kirk ends up getting frisky with the star of Dynasty. “The Trouble with Tribbles” reminds us that cute things can get out of control and irritating. In this case it is the Tribble, a fuzzy ball that makes a sweet cooing sound. This predicts the rise of the Furby. “Balance of Terror” introduces the Romulans as a menace that’s worse than the Klingons. It’s a high pursuit episode as Kirk uncovers the weakness to the Romulan ship’s cloaking device. “Amok Time” takes the crew to the planet Vulcan. While the Vulcans seem to be logical folks, their dating rituals are extremely violent. Spock’s fiancÃ©e orders him to fight Kirk in order to get to hitched. It’s a brutal battle between two friends. The episodes are taken from the new enhanced versions so the models have been replaced by CGI spaceships.

The Best of Star Trek The Next Generation has three adventures from the second go around on the Enterprise. These are the journeys of Picard and Riker at the helm. “The Best of Both Worlds” is a two parter with the Borg assimilating Picard. He looks extra creepy with the bio-mechanical accessories. The second episode has the crew looking to free their leader from the grip of the Cube folks. “Yesterday’s Enterprise” has the ship time travel. They discover the older Enterprise and Denise Crosby. The Klingons of the past want a piece of them. Is Denise Crosby bound to bite it again? “The Measure of a Man” has Picard fight to keep Data from being scrapped. Can he prove this robot is not state property? This is a fine primer for anyone wanting to know about the better adventures of ST:TNG without picking through 178 episodes.

GIVEAWAYS

We’ve got a double contest this week. How lucky can you get?

CBS DVD has given us 5 copies of The Mod Squad: Season 2 Volume 2 to give to very special Party Favors readers. In order to win, answer this question: What character returns from the pilot movie to get his revenge on the Mod Squad in this boxset? Send your answer, name and address to mokaha@aol.com. Put “Mod Squad” in the subject.

CBS DVD has given us 5 copies of Gunsmoke: The Third Season, Volume 2 to give away to Party Favors readers who like Westerns. In order to win, answer this question: What’s the freaky connection of Harry Dean Stanton’s name in “The Cabin?” Send your answer, name and address to mokaha@aol.com. Put “Mod Squad” in the subject.

Both contests end May 30, Good luck.

May 20, 2009
Party Favors: Documentaries & Wavy Gravy

DURHAM – Realism and connecting with your audience were the themes of the Full Frame Documentary Film Festival.

The days that numerous documentaries inspired major bidding wars, received massive publicity campaigns and pulled in healthy theatrical revenue are over. Many of the key dependable distributors have been slashed by the major studio parents. During the “State of the Doc” panel, there was no bragging about massive returns that were common during the era of March of the Penguins ($77 million) and Super-Size Me ($11 million). Magnolia was happy with the returns on Oscar winner Man on Wire from theatrical and DVD. But nobody was pricing a Porsche and a house in Malibu from their Wire share. The recession has hit the documentary world.

Matt Cowal, the VP of publicity and marketing at Magnolia said the company was more comfortable sinking a million dollars to advertise a film that makes $3 million than burn through $9 million in hopes of having the documentary crack $10 million. The tightening of promotional dollars has made marketing more strategic in an industry that loves to carpetbomb. What is the new model?

Gary Hustwit took over the discussion when it came to coming up with a new business model. The director of Helvetica and the upcoming Objectified said a good documentary film director must go straight to his audience via the internet. Helvetica became a sensation last year when the rep from Red Envelope/Netflix talked about how it was doing great numbers on the website’s WatchNow function. Why? Because graphic designers were geeking out to the documentary about the font. This wasn’t merely word of mouth. Hustwit spent his time working blogs and websites frequented by graphic designers. He made them part of the discussion of the film. It became a chapter in any good student’s textbook. He’s currently doing the same thing for Objectified which deals with designers of devices such as the iPod. No matter the subject of your documentary, there’s bound to be dozens of blogs receptive to knowing there’s a film coming out.

Hustwit also believes the documentary director needs to create a sensation when his film arrives in a town by appearing at a screening. He’s doing a cross-country journey when it opens later this spring. This is not a business for the shy. It should be noted that Hustwit worked at legendary indie label SST (Black Flag, fIREHOSE and Husker Du). He has the get in the van bravado when it comes to bring a movie to the people. He was not happy at the thought of letting the distributor take care of the “heavy work.” He likes to meet the people and share a beer with them after the screening. Plus he doesn’t want to lose control of his film.

Ira Deutchman of Emerging Pictures mentioned that digital projection should help movie theaters be able to grow an audience since they don’t have to deal with prints and storage. A film can only play once a week without it being a burden in the booth. He predicts a Midnight Movies effect can be possible. Plus it won’t require a distributor to spend $5,000 a print. But you still have to put butts in the seats.

Rick Allen of Snag Films wasn’t about the theatrical. Their company distributes documentaries over the internet using ad breaks to generate revenue. Their big boost is a connection to AOL. They place their nearly 1,000 titles into news articles related to the film. He mentioned that more people saw The Life And Times of Harvey Milk from their streams than watched it when it made it’s Oscar winning run two decades ago. There’s still not enough cash flow from online streaming to cover the nut on a quality documentary.

Molly Thompson of A&E’s IndieFilms discussed how a low budget reality series like Intervention get high ratings than when Jesus Camp ran on the channel. I asked if a filmmaker would be better off pitching an idea to A&E in which the documentary was a pilot movie for a reality series. She didn’t quite see that working. Although in a way this is how Cathouse and King of Cars went from one shot deals to shows. Although I can’t imagine weekly episodes of Burma VJ..

While some might view this panel as depressing, the words spoken by these players should be inspirational. If you’re going to make a documentary: Do it because you are passionate about the subject. If you are going to invest in a documentary: Do it because you want to spread the word about the subject. Be extremely sensible in your expenses and expectations. This isn’t a great way to get rich.

THE SCOOP

Saint Misbehavin’: The Wavy Gravy Movie proved to be a smash success. The film takes us into the life of the Woodstock icon who became an ice cream flavor. He’s the guy who served breakfast in bed to the concertgoers. He was also part of Ken Kesey’s Merry Pranksters as covered in Tom Wolfe’s Electric Acid Kool-Aid Test. His story doesn’t end as merely a relic of the ’60s. Director Michelle Esrick enlightens us to his two main passions: Camp Winnarainbow and the Seva Foundation. The Camp is for kids to learn circus skills. Seva goes around the world performing eye surgery on people who need it. Wavy has hosted numerous benefit concerts for Seva. This is a much happier and inspirational film than Rainbow Man.

After the screening, I had a chance to interview Wavy Gravy and Esrick. She had worked on this documentary for nearly a decade. His 72 years have been packed with a lot of major experience from the Beats to the psychedelic San Francisco scene. This connection made me ask a question that accidentally combine Neal Cassidy, the inspiration for Jack Kerouac’s On the Road and Jack Casady, the bassist for the Jefferson Airplane. This first segment deals with Wavy’s relationship with Neal and Jack and Jack. Plus he talks about his time with the Merry Pranksters.

Wavy now discusses the process of how he became an ice cream flavor. We also get the inside scoop on why the corporate beancounters killed his popular flavor. He reveals his plan as a frozen treat comeback as a sorbet. Finally he issues a challenge to Stephen Colbert and his Americone Dream.

Wavy gives you his surefire tip on how to come down from a bad LSD trip. The Party Favors would like you to either walk or get a sober friend to drive you to the grocery store. We do not condone people tripping behind the wheel. Wavy remembers his time at the first Woodstock. He has choice words for Fred Durst. Finally we get the answer to the question: Has Wavy Gravy met Meatloaf?

AFTER SHOW

Legendary documentarian D. A. Pennebaker was an executive producer on Saint Misbehavin’. He directed Don’t Look Back, Monterery Pop and The War Room (with his wife Chris Hegedus). We had a short unfilmed chat after the film. Turns out that contrary to rumor, he is not making a sequel to Al Franken: God Spoke. Al didn’t think it would be a good move to have a film crew following him around on his campaign to be Minnesota’s senator. Hopefully someone will construct a documentary on the insanity that is the recount that’s gone nearly half a year. Also no luck on Pennebaker making a director’s cut of Bob Dylan’s Eat the Document anytime soon.

THE FILMS

What I appreciate the most about Full Frame is that it is only about documentaries instead of mixing it up with the latest Indie drama sensations like Sundance. You’re getting an eyeful of reality instead of watching Hollywood stars slum it for a shot at Oscar gold. These are real people in jeopardy on the big screen.

The big winner of the festival was Burma VJ. Remember a few years back when we’d occasionally get reports on the news about riots in Rangoon? There wasn’t too much to show us since the military generals running the country had completely blocked all outside media from their borders. Burma VJ exposed a group of daring individuals who used small videocameras and cellphones to get the truth out to the world. Their footage is inspirational and horrifying. Ever seen a Japanese tourist with a videocamera get shot down in the street? There’s footage of a group of protesters trapped in a stairwell as the armed troops advance. These are people who are as good as dead. This is not a tourism board approved vision of the country. Burma VJ takes us to the heart of the battle for a struggle that we reduce to a blurb on a news network crawl while we get another update on the Octomom.

Unmistaken Child is a real life version of Little Buddha. A monk goes out in search of the reincarnated soul of his master. When he finds the kid, he has to talk the parents in giving up control of the child. The film also won several of the major awards. Supermen of Malegaon takes us to the indie world of Bollywood. It’s the creation of a fake Superman film minus paying any rights to use a version of the character. It’s hilarious to see the barely legal production.

Art & Copy is perfect viewing for fans of Mad Men. This is a historical appreciation of the advertising minds that brought us campaigns that have been seared into our collective minds. Did you know the same guy who created those sweet Perrier ads about the quaint village also brought us Ronald Reagan’s “It’s Morning Again in America” commercials? The troubling disclosure is that Nike’s “Just Do It” campaign was inspired by Gary Gilmore’s last words to the firing squad when he was execute in Utah. I spoke with the director and producers afterward. The big problem they had was clearing the commercials for inclusion. They had to take off the Beatles’ “Revolution” from the Nike ad since there was no way they could license the song. After seeing the film, you’ll have to hop onto youtube to see bootleg copies of the ads that couldn’t make the cut. Mechanical Love wasn’t quite Lars and the Real Girl Come Alive. The film focuses on a more platonic robot-human relationship. A woman at a retirement home gets happiness from taking care of her cyber-seal pup. The interaction keeps her active versus the other elderly ladies. The bizarre part is a Japanese scientist making an android version of himself. His goal is to see how his wife and child react to the replacement dad. He thinks the wife will like the robo-hubby since the guy will pay attention to her. It’s a creepy film that can be a precursor to The Terminator.

Wounded Knee breaks down the time in 1973 when the American Indian Movement took over a small town in South Dakota to protest the injustices at a nearby reservation. The filmmakers got their hands on plenty of original footage to let us get a sense of the stand off. All sides get their say in the recent interviews. Like Burma VJ, we get to see the heart of the battle as it happened. This is scheduled to play on PBS soon. Bitch Academy takes us inside a class that teaches Russian women how to seduce and marry rich Western men. It’s almost a stripper education for these ladies.

The film that made me a raving cheerleader was Smile Til It Hurts: The Up With People Story. Because the movie is under a review embargo, I’m not allowed to say too much. If you every wondered if those lame kids who used to sing at halftime of the Super Bowl were part of a freakish cult, this movie answers the question. It’s a “family friendly” creepfest. What makes this documentary really work is that director Lee Story and crew were able to interview every side from the disenchanted ex-members to the guy who ran it. Did you know they paid to be a part of the show? Your impression of these kids will change by the end of the film. They also have tons of vintage footage including their squeaky clean Super Bowl performances. When “Smile Til It Hurts comes to your town, run down to the cinema or festival.

Once more Full Frame proved to be a top tier film festival with it’s line up. It’s impossible to see all the films they show, but I never felt completely cheated by the ones I chose. They wrapped it up with an Awards lunch featuring BBQ. Mmmmmm. Nothing tastes like victory than a plate of BBQ and a sweet tea. If you have a free week in April, come on down for next year’s festival. I’ll save a hush puppy for you.

DVD SHELF

American Swing gets inside the world of Plato’s Retreat. The legendary Manhattan swingers club rose to fame in the late ’70s with its message of sexual liberation for married couples. The club was a great place to bring the wife, meet interesting people and catch their crabs. Larry Levinson was the owner of Plato’s. He became the spokesperson for the swinging lifestyle. We get to see him on various talkshows including Phil Donahue old chatter. The movie is hilarious with Buck Henry and others talking about the buffet they served at the sex club. They didn’t have a sneeze guard. Who knew what dripped on the meatloaf. The most disturbing part of the film is realizing that the proclaimed King of Swing wasn’t really a swinger. He had a girlfriend that was the semi-Queen of the club, but she was a figurehead in his life. They weren’t a couple. Larry was guy who liked to screw and built a kingdom to get him more ladies than a fleet of Corvettes. There’s the hint that mobsters controlled this den of sin. What makes this documentary better than any talking head effort on VH1 is that there’s tons of X-rated footage from inside Plato’s Retreat. For folks with a fetish for ’70s Bridge and Tunnel grooming, you’ll be chicken choking heaven. I dare you to watch this with grandma and ask if she had the double fro in ’77.

Ron White: Behavioral Problems brings more insight from the boozing member of The Blue Collar Comedy Tour. He’s my favorite of the quartet. Ron’s the only one I can imagine paying to see. This performance from Seattle allows him to breakdown his recent bust for marijuana possession when the cops cornered his private jet. He talks about how the pleasure of a bidet has made him understand the allure of gay sex. The talk about anal sex with his wife is right on the mark. The DVD gives 40 more minutes to his routine than what you’ll catch on the Comedy Central version of the special. It’s worth it for his talk about Brokeback Mountain. You’ll never spit in your hand again without thinking of Ron’s take.

Splinter is the perfect excuse to not take your significant other on a camping trip. A happy couple (Paulo Costanzo and Jill Wagner) go on a romantic outdoor vacation. She’s lured him into the wilderness with the promise of anniversary sex under the stars. However things go wrong when they’re taken hostage by an escaped convict (Shea Whigham) and his girlfriend (Rachel Kerbs). Normally that’s enough for a film, but this one takes a monster twist. A weird virus is spreading that turns creatures into killer porcupines. The couples are trapped inside a country service station while the monsters attack wanting to make them monsters. This is good spooky fun with the vicious, spiny creatures tearing up the screen. Splinter is the Party Favors’ scare-fest of the week.

Hawaii Five-O: The Sixth Season brings another dose of island justice to the mainland. You can’t top Steve McGarrett (Jack Lord) as the ultimate lawman since he answers to nobody when he’s on a case. “Hookman” has a sniper going around killing cops. He’s got a bullet for McGarrett. The twist is the killer has hooks for hands thus he leaves no fingerprints at the crime scenes. “Charter for Death” has Bert Convy playing a mobster’s son-in-law. They’re smuggling themselves back into America except they caught bubonic plague. The Five-O crew have to track him down before he infects the town. “One Big Happy Family” is a stunner since it has Slim Pickens (Blazing Saddles) being the father of a murderous family. Have you ever seen Slim knife a man to death? His equally cold blooded son is Bo Hopkins. He’s the guy who looked like Jerry Reed in those Burt Reynolds’ films. Hawaii Five-O: The Sixth Season has the show being more grounded in the cop work than the freaky sci-fi angles. There’s no Wo Fat this season.

Mission: Impossible: The Sixth TV Season is the penultimate outing for the espionage series. Lynda Day George has replaced Lesley Ann Warren as the female member of the task force. Leonard Nimoy is gone after two seasons. But they didn’t replace him with a new man of a 1,000 faces mimic. We’re left with Peter Graves, Peter Lupus and Greg Morris as the key team members. The show in 1971-72 season focuses on them fighting mobsters. There’s not too many missions involving Latin America or Eastern Bloc countries. “Blind” has Peter Graves using a special pair of contact lens to fake being blind. Can he fool a mobster into letting him take over the inner sanctum. Tom Bosley (Happy Days) is part of the mob. “Encore” has the team make William Shatner (Star Trek) fooled into thinking it’s three decades earlier. They want to know where he hid a body. Can they fool him into a flashback confession? “The Miracle” brings us the magic of Joe Don Baker. They have to locate a heroin shipment. Russ Meyer’s mega-star and Squidbilly voice Charles Napier is a thug on “Run for the Money.” Geoffrey Lewis (the man who isn’t Robert Pine) is part of a devious plot to put a murder witness into mental hospital in “The Committed.” Following up his Hawaii Five-O guest shot, Bert Convy is back in “Trapped.” The shift to domestic missions helps the show since they no longer have to redress the Desliu studios as an alleged foreign country. Rumor has it the final season will be out this fall.

Jake and the Fatman: Season Two was a major game changer for the series since they decided to send William Conrad and Joe Penny to Hawaii. Why the location shift? To fill the production gap left by Magnum P.I. Because of a writer’s strike, season two only had the two-hour movie and 9 episodes. “Wish You Were Here” has Jake fly to Hawaii to visit an old buddy. Things go bad when the guy is killed by a sniper. There’s a few Hawaii Five-O alumni on this episode including Al Harrington (Det. Ben Kokua) and Khigh Dhiegh (Wo Fat) still on their same side of the law. The new location does pretty up the gruff Fatman. He’s an unshaven Buddha in a tropical paradise. Can the Fatman clean up the islands like Jack Lord?

A Song Is Born brings together Howard Hawks and Billy Wilder in a world of jazz legends. A gangster’s moll (Virginia Mayo) hides from the cops at a musical research institute. She attacks the eye of the head professor (Danny Kaye). Can he impress a woman who has a thing for extremely bad boys? The highlight of the film is getting to see Tommy Dorsey, Louis Armstrong, Lionel Hampton and Benny Goodman perform in Technicolor.

It’s a Pleasure will answer the question for fans of Car Talk that wonder what they mean by “Sonja Henie’s tutu.” The ice skating sensation stars in this Technicolor romance on ice. This is an early version of The Cutting Edge. Michael O’Shea is hockey player that’s banned from the sport after he beats up a ref. His only chance at redemption is to become Sonja Henie’s figure skating partner. Can he clean up his act? He gets tempted to party up with Marie McDonald skates onto the ice. There’s plenty of great skating action that should appeal to the fans of the sport.

The Goldwyn Follies is a Technicolor musical featuring the music of George and Ira Gershwin. Adolphe Menjou is the producer of box office hits who hits a cold streak. In order to connect to the little people, he hires Andrea Leeds to connect to the common man. However his wants to connect with her on a carnal basis. Things get complicated when singer Kenny Baker also wants Andrea. Producer versus crooner is never a fair fight since a producer really knows how to thrill a woman with a production. The songs include “Love Walked In” and “Love Is Here to Stay.” It’s a fun nostalgic view of an innocent love triangle that glows like its hues.

GIVEAWAY

CBS DVD is letting us send 5 lucky Party Favors readers a copy of Mission: Impossible: The Sixth TV Season. If you chose to accept this giveaway, all you need to do is answer this question: What hosts of Tattle Tales and Raw Nerve are guest villains on this boxset. Send the answers along with your name and address to mokaha@aol.com. Put “Mission: Impossible 6” in the subject line. Contest ends on April 29, 2009. Good luck. This column won’t go up in smoke.

April 16, 2009
Party Favors: On The Chopping Block

BRONX – This was supposed to be an interview with world famous chef Marco Pierre White. Ever since NBC announced he was hosting Chopping Block, the Party Favors staff was in overdrive sucking up to the network publicity people to spend precious minutes with White. The guy is a culinary god and readers want to know why black rice is so forbidden.

After a bout of begging that is reserved for getting off death row, the network told us that there would be no interview. After watching the premiere of Chopping Block, it quickly became apparent why Marco Pierre White wasn’t eager to spend hours working the phone to hype the show. It was a lame disaster. Instead of making Marco a household personality like Gordon Ramsay’s various shows, Chopping Block made Marco look like a massive douchebag who dressed like a villain on Miami Vice played by Joe Cocker..

Versions of the series worked around the globe. They put together 8 couples to run two rival restaurants. The last couple standing get their restaurant dream fulfilled. How could the American take of the series be such an utter failure? Ultimately there’s three reasons why a reality show goes bust: Casting, Casting and Casting.

There’s two types of people that you cast on a cooking show. The first are people who are extremely talented. They are magicians in the kitchen. Even with the inability to smell or taste their food, a viewer gets hungry. These wizards end up on Top Chef and Iron Chef. The second group of people that get cast are complete morons who swear they’d be an Iron Chef if Bobby Flay hadn’t been scared of their mac and cheese. These folks can barely run a soft serve ice cream machine. But they view themselves as God’s gift to culinary skills. They don’t handle criticism well because anyone who disagrees is a jealous bitch. These people end up on Hell’s Kitchen.

Unfortunately neither of these two groups were cast on Chopping Block. We were given eight couples who had no business running a hotdog cart let alone a fine dining establishment in Manhattan. Under no circumstances did you copy their recipes let alone pay top dollar for their meals. What makes the show completely horrible is that they are timid and meek. They quiver when Marco Pierre White enters the room. Nobody is cocky enough to say, “This is how we do it in America, soccer boy!” These are not compelling people working the pots and pans. There’s one old guy who looks like Bruce Dern if he’d work at the post office. They are forgettable in words, action and attitude.

The producers needed to cast people who had run restaurants that had received praise from major foodie publication, but had closed for various reasons. These people would been excited with a chance to get in the game. They know the price and they’re willing to pay twice as much. They’ll also get nasty because they won’t let some other jerk derail them with a bloody chicken breast. The people on Chopping Block were hobbyists and not chefs. They won’t break out in tears and beg Marco Pierre White to send them home cause they haven’t the heart to work the line.

At least the embarrassment for Marco Pierre White has been cut short. After only three episodes of what should be a 7 show run, NBC yanked Chopping Block off the schedule. Not much of a surprise although the network did burn all the episodes of Kath and Kim. How did this show with so many lame issues even get an airdate? NBC’s cable channel Bravo would have never cast these people for their competition shows. Why did the mother network approve? They should have picked diamond personalities for the major leagues. They could have retread a few folks from Top Chef.

Who could have approved this project and put it on the schedule? Perhaps it would be a man who says, “I don’t think we’ll ever be able to say, ‘NBC is No. 1 in prime time.’” That debbie downer would be Jeff Zucker, the head of NBC-Universal. Did you know that when he graduated from his job at the Today Show, Zucker was running the #1 network in primetime? And what has he done since those early years in 2000 when he was given the keys to the Rolls Royce? He’s refused to check the oil. He allowed the network to become a laughing stock with revivals of The Bionic Woman and Knight Rider.. He got a minor hit off Deal or No Deal and overloaded the slate with more arena gameshows. On many nights, the network is #5 behind Univision. The USA channel (part of NBC-U) garners higher ratings than many NBC shows.

Why can’t this man get NBC back to #1 in the ratings? It doesn’t take that much effort. This is not like a community college football coach accepting the reality that his flag football team won’t be playing in the BCS Championship game against Florida. There’s only three other networks. It’s musical chairs except you can’t win if you’re crying in a bathroom stall while the music plays. Any other big cheese would have his ass thrown out the door for admitting defeat and not even making an effort to turn around the network’s fortunes. All Zucker can do is expand The Today Show and slide Leno into primetime. Has this peacock any pride?

What’s interesting is that NBC’s family of cable channels are doing great. Why? Perhaps less Zucker is best Zucker when it comes to success. The star of Fat Actress was asked about the suits in charge of the non-network programming. “If these channels weren’t as successful as they are, I’d have to get involved more. But I’d be stupid if I spent my time telling them what they’re doing wrong, because they’re not doing much wrong.” Because having Zucker more involved has done wonders for NBC. Does the board of directors not notice that the most successful division is the one he doesn’t touch? People are getting fired every day in this recession. Why is working?

He ought to be arrested for what he did to Marco Pierre White’s reputation in America.

FESTIVAL TIME

The Full Frame Documentary Film Festival takes place this week (April 2 -5) in Durham. Last’s years festival featured several of the eventual Oscar nominees including the winner Man on Wire.. This is my favorite of film festivals since they serve Eastern NC pork BBQ during the award ceremony. Everybody is a winner with vinegar based BBQ.

The films that I’ve been tipped to see include Bitch Academy about a school in St. Petersburg that teaches young Russian girls to be vixens. Carmen Meets Borat tells the sad story of the Romanian girl who thought she was going to be a star after appearing in Sacha Baron Cohen’s film. “Saint Misbehavin’: The Wavy Gravy Movie” explains who a guy at Woodstock became an ice cream flavor. “Yes Men Fix the World” bring back the high level pranksters that dare to shake up the corporate system. “Zidane: A 21st Century Portrait” is Darius Khondji’s view of the soccer great who headbutted himself out of a World Cup.

If you’re in the Durham, please drop on by. Details and screening times can be found at www.fullframefest.org. If you’re really quiet and discrete, you can watch D.A. Pennebaker holding court.

FEUD UPDATE

After last year’s tiff with Blockbuster’s CEO Jim Keyes, his stock dropped to 13 cents a share. Way to prove me that you’re a turnaround genius. It should be noted that the guy did clear $8.4 million while running a company whose stock is currently trading for less than any of the candy they sell at the register.

LAND OF THE LOSERS

I was actually looking forward to the big screen remake of Land of the Lost. The old show is still hilarious to watch at 2 a.m. with a buzz in my head. How could having Danny McBride and Will Ferrell fall down that waterfall not lead to anachronistic funny? The answer is simple. Will is not Danny’s father and the Holly character is not the daughter. The trailer gives us a film that’s all about Will’s feud with The Today Show‘s Matt Lauer. The fight isn’t nearly as good as Bob Barker busting up Adam Sandler in Happy Gilmore. Another major warning sign is that Brad Silerling is directing. This is man who sucked the soul from Wings of Desire when he hacked it into City of Angels.

Land of the Lost is shaping up to be this summer’s Speed Racer. They better have more Chaka in it.

WHO WAS WHERE?

Anyone else shocked and disgusted that Salman Rushdie was at Perez Hilton’s birthday party? Mr. Serious Literature was rubbing elbows with the Queen of All Media. Why? Does Salman Rushdie have any shame? Or is he in maximum media whore overdrive? Was he trying to pick up Tara Reid by pointing out he was married to Padma from Top Chef? Was he explaining how the lyrics of the Jonas Brothers rival Keats?

When the Ayatollah Khomeini declared a fatwa on Rushdie, we supported this guy. Nobody wanted to see him die for writing The Satanic Verses. But now I wonder what was the point in protecting Rushdie if he’s going to rub shoulders with a man who draws cum and penises on celeb’s faces. Maybe Salman hopes that Perez will uncover nip slips from Padma?

IF YOU ACT NOW

Anyone else pumped up to see Billy Mays star in “Pitchman” on the Discovery channel starting April 15? I’m so thrilled that we’ll get an entire episode dedicated to Mays beard maintenance regime. The big finale will be Mays flying down to Miami to help Vince clean up his image after his hooker incident.

The best reality dating show is slated to premiere this fall when TVLand presents For the Love of Ray J Johnson Jr. It’s hilarious to see how desperate these middle aged women are to hook up with the ’70s icon. At least five times each show one of them accidentally calls him Mr. Johnson. And then the funny overwhelms us: cause you can call him Ray and you can call him J and you can…..let’s go to the old beer ad:

BLU-RAY HEAVEN

Quantum of Solace Blu-ray is the natural sequel to Casino Royale. Daniel Craig’s second outing as James Bond picks up right where the last one left off. He’s zipping down a dangerous lakeside highway being chased. This sets the tempo of the film – non-stop, unrelenting action. There’s little time for quips or jokes as Bond is out for revenge against the secret organization that messed up his relationship with Vesper Lynd. Quantum consists of powerful world leaders that manipulate the world. It’s like the Illuminati. Bond sniffs out their plan to control a Latin American country by taking over the water rights. He’s got to stop the French version of Al Gore. The only goofy named Bond girl is Strawberry Fields (Gemma Arterton) which isn’t that bad since you can believe a Beatles fan would do that to their daughter. Jeffrey Wright returns as CIA agent Felix Leiter. He does need his own spin off film with Bond being the guest spy. The best way to watch Quantum of Solace is as the third act of Casino Royale. Make it a double feature and you’ll double your viewing pleasure. The 1080p image is stunning with the massive action scenes and breathtaking locations filling the widescreen. The bonus features aren’t quite up to the level of the classic Bond titles. “Crew Files” also the people on the credit roll to show off their skills.

Never Say Never Again Blu-ray reminds us that Sean Connery gave flesh to the role.. After over a decade since Diamonds Are Forever, Connery returned to the tuxedo in this non-EON produced adventure. The film is basically a remake of Thunderball with Bond out to recover nuclear warheads from SPECTRE. Connery plays Bond a little bit older. He’s not passing himself off as a spring chicken as he tracks down Largo (Klaus Maria Brandauer). Even with a little bit of grey, he’s still a stud with the ladies. He’s seducing Kim Basinger while nearly getting killed by Barbara Carrera. After years of being the bastard of Bond titles, Never Say Never Again is finally given a chance to shine. The Hi-Def transfer is cherry. You’ll want to project this big. The bonus features allow us to learn about how EON was doing its best to shut down the film in the middle of production. Who knew that Sean Connery’s biggest antagonist would be Cubby Broccoli.

James Bond Blu-Ray Volume Three provides three upgrades for the 007 fanatic. This pack includes Goldfinger, Moonraker and The World Is Not Enough. There are few third films in a series as worthy as Goldfinger. Sean Connery is completely at ease as 007. Super villain Auric Goldfinger (Gert Frobe) is obsessed with the metal. He can’t have enough of it. He prove it’s a very versatile metal when he candy coats a woman to kill her. Bond has to find out Goldfinger’s plot to dominate the gold market. Getting in his way is the henchman Oddjob (Harold Sakata) and the pilot Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman). Moonraker is Roger Moore at his goofiest. He’s got to stop a diabolical madman who wants to colonize space so that he can destroy the earth and rebuild it properly. There’s plenty of intrigue with stolen Space Shuttles. They bring back Jaws (Richard Kiel) and find him a woman. There’s more laughs than scares during the epic outer space battles. The film was Bernard Lee’s last as M. The World Is Not Enough was Pierce Brosnan’s second Bond. This is the film that demanded we believe Denise Richards (It’s Complicated) is smart enough to be a research scientist called Christmas Jones. That’s complicated. Bond gets tied into an evil plot to disrupt an oil empire controlled by Sophie Marceau. Robert Carlyle (Trainspotting) is the psychotic killer who wants to put an end to Bond and Richards. The guy wasn’t half bad in his intent. The films are packed with the bonus features that were on the Bond Ultimate Editions. The 1080p transfers are impeccable. The Technicolor on Goldfinger dazzles. This is our Raymond J. Regis memorial pick of the month!

DVD SHELF

The Girls Next Door: Season Four makes for fun awkward viewing. It was during this batch of episodes that rumors swirled that Hugh Hefner’s trio of girlfriends weren’t still sleeping in his Playboy Mansion bed. People watched the show not for the pleasure, but to be divorce detectives. Holly Madison still thinks she’s going to marry Hef and pop out his puppies. Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt are merely out to enjoy the ride. This is the season when the girls went to Alaska, Monte Carlo and Jamaica They even throw in what’s considered the first four episodes of season five. Thrill to the making of House Bunny at the Mansion with Anna Faris (Smiley Face). Bridget gets to produce her first horror film thus showing she can work a career that doesn’t involve Viagra. The best thing about watching the show on DVD is the nudity isn’t fuzzed out and there’s no commercial breaks featuring Ryan Seacrest. You’ll finally get to see Kendra’s smartest investment in motion.

Dynasty: The Fourth Season, Volume One contains another 14 episodes of the Carrington saga. Blake (John Forsythe) and Krystle (Linda Evans) finally get married. Alexis (Joan Collins) continues to be a skank when she hooks up with Dex Dexter (Michael Nader). They’re a toxic delight. One of the family bites the dust so there’s plenty of tension. The show lasted nine seasons so we’re not even halfway done yet.

Beverly Hills 90210: The Seventh Season is historic for only one reason – finally, after an act of Congress, Donna (Tori Spelling) finally loses her virginity. How shocking. America’s long national nightmare ended on that night. Even Mindy Cohn wanted Donna to just get it over and put out. However there is a serious nature to TV sex when Kelly (Jennie Garth) gets knocked up. Brandon (Jason Priestley) gets knocked loopy during a hockey fight. The kids are about to finally graduate from college this season. What will they do? Perhaps they have a graduate school at C.U.? Although it does look like Donna’s going to flunk. That’s what happens to bad girls. Only three more seasons before the entire Beverly Hills 90210 saga is on DVD.

Wings: The Final Season wraps up life at the Nantucket airport after eight seasons. Like the previous year, the first episode opens with a house fire. “Porno for Pyros” has Roma Maffia (Nip/Tuck) investigate the inferno. But the smoldering heat is coming from Tony Shalhoub (Monk). “…Like a Neighbor Scored” has Chris Elliott move next door to Tim Daly and Crystal Bernard. They try to play nice, but he’s got his own set of weird rules. It’ is Chris Elliott after all. Jenny McCarthy gives one of her early acting with clothes roles during “Maybe It’s You.” “All About Christmas Eve” rules for one reason: Abe Vigoda. You can never have enough Fish for the holidays. Larry “Bud” Melman cameos in “Escape From New York..” “Final Approach” is a two parter that brings the series to a close. I’m not going to spoil it, but the FAA did approve of the finale.

Hannah Montana Keeping It Real has Dwayne Johnson making a guest appearance. It’s a shame he’s no longer going by the Rock. Cause the Rock would have at least used the People’s Elbow on Billy Ray Cyrus. He’d yank the blond off Hannah and expose that she’s really Miley.. Dwyane Johnson can brighten up any sitcom with a guest shot. He made me watch this. There’s power in his grin. The episodes on the DVD attempt to remind us why it’s bad to use your celebrity to snag perks. There’s plenty of preview action for the upcoming Hannah Montana movie including a movie ticket good for $7.50. This means you’ll have to go to a matinee if you want to get in for free.

Donkey Punch is the first public serve announcement warning us about this sexual practice. A trio of English girls hanging out in Spain run into a pack of guys who are working on an expensive yacht. They hit the ocean for a champagne and ecstasy free for all. Which starts out to be a good idea. When the pills kick in, the party takes over the master bedroom. There’s some good loving going on. But things go bad when one of the boys decides to test out the Donkey Punch technique.. Basically this involves punching a woman in the back of the head right before she climaxes. Is this really a fad? I’d guess the average woman would rather receive a Cleveland Steamer than a Donkey Punch. In the movie, there’s a very negative consequence to the girl who receives the head blow. It basically kills the party spirit. Things get uglier and uglier as the guys attempt to figure out how to cover this incident up. The girls fear for their survival. It’s a free for all during the long dark night. The film reminds me once more why partying on strange boats is never a good idea no matter how primo the promised drugs. Donkey Punch delivers what it promises – a seductive and scary cruise.

Shuttle is a scary film for anyone hanging out at an airport. Peyton List and Cameron Goodman are returning from a vacation in Mexico. They save a few bucks by grabbing a discount shuttle that’s going to take them into downtown Boston. As part of the get what you pay for nightmare, it turns out their shuttle driver (Tony Curran) is a psychotic. He takes everyone hostage. Nobody is quite sure what he’s really after except expressing his sadistic delight. This is perhaps the scariest trip from Logan Airport that didn’t involve my grandfather at the wheel. The man drifted lanes on bridges. Shuttle keeps pouring on the pressure. It’s a nightmare for the girls. The only letdown is that there’s no talk about Manny. How can a movie take place in Boston without someone talking about Manny? Curran maintains the proper composure for as the madman taking the wheel. He does a superb job switching between sweet guy and scary ass driver. Only guy more frightening in Boston is Scott Boras. The end of the film doesn’t compromise the tension. After watching Shuttle, you’ll always take the Silver Line when arriving in Logan.

Special: Specioprin Hydrochloride is a great performance from Michael Rapaport (War At Home). He’s a normal kinda guy who takes part in a drug study. The pills have an amazing side effect for the metermaid. He becomes a superhero like the people in the comic books he loves.. Or is he? Either way, he changes his life to do his true work for humanity.. Rapaport is in the zone as he tests out his newfound powers even if everybody around him thinks he’s nuts. Rapaport has a face that can pull off this kind of action. You’ll be quoting his delusional dialogue after one viewing.

Timecrimes is a murder mystery that gets complicated with time machine action. After a guy stumbles upon a murder scene, the killer pursues him. He seeks refuge in a lab that has a time machine of Mr. Peabody proportions. He gets sent back a few hours. The Spanish triller gets twisted when the scientist doesn’t want this guy to interfere in this past tense for fear of severally messing up the future. But naturally this doesn’t turn out to be easy to do. Instead he ends up overlapping his other self. It’s a Mobius loop of a plot that pays off in a European way.

BOOK ME, DANNO!

In order to celebrate the release of Hawaii Five-O: The Sixth Season, CBS DVD is letting 5 lucky Party Favors readers win copies of the DVD boxset. It’s a crime not to enter the contest to share in the Jack Lord. The question to help you win is name the episode that features the star of Mr. T and Tina. Send your answer along with your name, address and favorite member of the Hawaii Five-O force to mokaha@aol.com. Staff members of the Party Favors, Mr. T, and Jack Lord can not enter. Be here, aloha!

April 2, 2009
Party Favors: Wallace Shawn Interview

RICHMOND – Pass up a chance to talk with Wallace Shawn? Inconceivable!!!

Shawn has appeared in more than 125 movies and TV shows over the last 30 years. He was the face of Indie cinema in the early ’80s with My Dinner with Andre. Teenage girls knows him from The Princess Bride. Children recognize him from various Pixar films. Even geeks have experienced him from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. He’s everywhere. Ultimately Shawn is a playwright who acts. Our phone call was in celebration of the release of Marie and Bruce on DVD from Genius Products/The Weinstein Company. He wrote the original play.

Marie and Bruce are a married couple that are hitting a nasty rough spot. Julianne Moore and Matthew Broderick are well cast as the pair that are having major communication issues. Most of this crisis comes from their ability to avoid talk to each other yet they say so much. She’s ready for a divorce. He hasn’t a clue. I ponder if these Manhattanites were guinea pigs for MDMA (ecstasy) tests. The scene of Julianne Moore on the sofa at a party looks like she’s rolling hard.

“Of course they’re drinking a lot. Some people have interpreted it as being about drinkers,” Shawn said. “You may be the first to interpret it about people taking a lot of drugs. I don’t really like to tell people how to interpret what I write. In my head if you want to know, that doesn’t matter. I don’t think writers are the biggest experts of what they write.

“If I were even going to venture a comment…people live a great deal inside their own head where fantasy and reality crash into each other. These two are very involved in fantasy. The party is seen through Marie’s eyes. She’s not seeing it the way you would see it. She’s seeing it through her emotional state. In her mind this is a very important day. The party is the very last moment before she’s making this important announcement to Bruce that she’s going to be leaving him. I think she lives in her imagination anyway. Somebody could speculate that neither of these two have found an appropriate outlet for their talents and their intelligence. It’s filtering into their fantasy life too active.”

Had Moore and Broderick performed the play before the filming?

“No,” Shawn said. “But Julianne had read it when she was 18.”

She seems so natural as Marie. Has she become a reverse muse for the role?

“I feel we haven an unspoken shared taste in many ways,” Shawn said. “An unspoken shared feeling about many things. There is some kind of natural compatibility.”

It is hard to imagine any other actress being able to own these lines. Her attitude accents the frustrated and spacey observations.

“It takes unbelievable technique and inspiration to make this unnatural dialogue seem natural. Particularly in the film it must. Film is in general a very realistic medium. Here you have a film in which the chairs and tables are realistic so the dialogue, even though it is not at all realistic, has to somehow seem realistic and believable. That is the wonderful skill that both Julianne and Matthew bring to it. (Some people) can’t cope with the dialogue and they say, ‘This is not like life.’ Actually, the dialogue in most movies is not anything like life. There are certain movie cliches about life that most movies imitate. This one is some other category.”

Shawn is only listed for writing the play and co-writing the screenplay with director Tom Cairns. But he didn’t merely type the words and let everyone else make the movie.

“I was extremely involved in the production. I missed some days of filming, but I was a there for a lot of them. I was totally involved in getting it together before filming. I picked Tom (Cairns). Tom and I have collaborated on many things and have had a wonderful working relationship..”

He could have easily had his name pop up in various parts of the credits. He didn’t even want to give himself a minor role. “I did make a deliberate decision,” Shawn said. “I wanted to be treated as the writer on this project. It would be an in-joke if I’d appeared in the party playing one of the characters. For those who know that I was the writer, it becomes a distraction. For that moment your focus will be in the wrong place.”

Two famous faces that do pop up in the film are Bob Balaban (Seinfeld) and Griffin Dunne (After Hours). Both actors have a history with the work. “They were both in the original production of the play,” Shawn said. “Griffin was the character at the party and Bob Balaban played Bruce.” Now the table has turned for Bob since he plays Roger, Bruce’s friend who knows way too much about public sewage projects. Turns nobody played Roger in the original production.

“That scene didn’t exist in the play. In the play, he says he’s going to meet Roger. She says, “The world’s most fascinating person.” But we never see Roger.”

Was it interesting to revisit the play to create these inbetween scenes? “It was fun. In the play these are long monologues about their respective day between breakfast and dinner. They are alone and both involved in their imagination. It was fun to film those days.”

What makes Marie and Bruce entertaining is that they aren’t a completely dysfunctional couple that arrives on Jerry Springer’s stage. There’s hope.

“There’s potential there that hasn’t been unlocked between them,” Shawn analyzed. “Not sure that if I was a marriage counselor that I’d say, ‘You should get divorced as quickly as possible.’ Freud said people need love and work. These are two people who have not found meaningful work that is important to them. I think that could be very important in them discussing their problems.”

At this point, our conversation turns to his work. Shawn is an extremely busy man. This TV season he’s appeared on Life on Mars, ER, L Word and Gossip Girl. I have to ask about his time on L Word as the wealthy backer of Jenny Schecter’s movie. What is it like to be the focus of Mia Kirshner’s goddess-like eyes?

“She’s an extraordinary person,” Shawn praised. “The French refer to someone’s gaze as ‘regard.’ Hers is very unblinking. Strangely unblinking.”

He sounded kinda disappointed that he was not suspected of killing Jenny. Or that his on-screen relationship with the character was chaste. “There was a clear indication in the scripts that he was in love with her. He hoped for a deeper attachment.”

I bring up the topic of what it’s like to be an in demand character actor in Hollywood. Shawn puts me straight.

“In life we’re all leading men and women,” Shawn declared. “We don’t see ourselves as character actors in life. I don’t think too many actors see themselves as character actors. That’s more something that other people would put on you because they have certain cliched ideas about life. Certainly it’s a phrase that I don’t know anybody has applied to himself. God knows I’ve never said I’m a character actor.

“A character actor is not the main actor. The phrase implies a certain view of life in which there are tall, thin people who are the real people. They are surrounded by a rogues gallery of bizarre people: fat, short, bald. Those people make life interesting for the real people. I don’t see life that way. I don’t see myself that way. In the real world, I don’t occupy a position of being just an amusing sidekick to a guy that lives on the floor below me who happens to be tall. When we meet in the hall, we meet as equals.”

At that moment, I’m stuck with the strange feeling that we’re having this phone conversation as part of a rehearsal for Synecdoche, New York. The image of Shawn meeting the tall man immediately brings up his role of Vizzini in The Princess Bride. What was it like to work with Andre The Giant, the late wrestling legend?

“He was fascinating,” Shawn praised. “I found it quite wonderful to meet him and know him. He was a very talented man who had figured out a way to live the life that he wanted to live despite having an absolutely incredible disability.

“It’s totally remarkable that somebody could walk onto a set and be able to act. That’s very, very rare. I think he’d only been in one movie before that and he had no lines. He was remarkable. He did have incredible ability of hitting his mark. You’re supposed to not just talk but go to right place at the right time. You have little marks on the floor to show where you’re supposed to go. Because the marks are on the floor, you’re not supposed be looking at them. They’re quite hard to follow. I find it quite hard to say dialogue and move and go to the right place at the same time. Particularly to remember that you’re supposed to go over here and then somewhere else and somewhere else. It’s very difficult. He did that effortlessly. He’d do it right on the first take. The rest of us would take several tries to hit it right.”

Currently Shawn’s in rehearsals for a play with Miranda Richardson and Jennifer Tilly that’s taking place in London this May. Directing him will be his longtime pal Andre Gregory. The duo took the cinema by storm with My Dinner with Andre. The movie was about them having dinner. There was no explosions or gunplay. Just conversation between two people. It became an art house sensation.

Shawn has never been approached to host a series of interviews over dinner like IFC’s Dinner for Five. He’s had people begging him to recreate the role, but for the wrong reasons. “I’ve steered clear of a few parodies,” he said.

The good news about the movie is that it is finally coming back to DVD (and hopefully Blu-ray) with a high quality image transfer. “Criterion is bringing it out in the next few months. The results are great.” Shawn and Gregory have been interviewed for the bonus features.

What is the secret of Shawn and Gregory remaining pals and creative partners?

“We’ve been working together since 1970,” Shawn said. “We really do have a congruence of tastes. It’s rare to meet someone who is in your field who understands you and you understand them. You’re motivated to stick with that person and make that relationship work. You’re not going to run into anyone like that for the rest of your life. We don’t do exactly the same thing. I write and act. He directors. He can bring things out of me as an actor that are pretty surprising.”

We talk about a few of the major directors he’s worked with over the years. Perhaps the second most important director in his career is Woody Allen. He’s appeared in half a dozen of Woody’s film. Does he view himself as the nemesis of Woody’s screen proxies? “I was a little bit that it in Manhattan, the first one I did,” Shawn declared. “Otherwise I think I’ve been one of the troupe.” He was hyped as a sexual monster by Diane Keaton’s character in Manhattan. Did this role have the ladies rushing up to him to experience his carnal secrets? He laughed. “Most people took it as a movie.”

His work as the voice of Rex the Green Dinosaur in the Toy Story movies does get the kids running towards him.

“I do meet a lot of kids at airports. There are kids who recognize my voice. They hear my voice and go, ‘That guy is dinosaur.’”

He has recorded his dinosaur lines for the upcoming Toy Story 3. He was relived that during the time when Pixar was going to split with Disney that the mouse didn’t follow through with its threat to make Toy Story 3 without John Lasseter and his crew’s involvement. “That would have been absolutely horrible,” Shawn said.

One of Shawn’s earliest role is a brief part in Bob Fosse’s dazzling All That Jazz. What memories does Shawn have of working with the legendary director?

“That was way back there,” Shawn said. “I was only there for like a day. I’m almost incapable of answering that one. It all went by in a couple of hours. It was strange because he was painting a very disturbing portrait of himself. I found it disturbing.”

As a playwright, would he ever create an autobiographical work that intense?

“I’m guided by a muse. I don’t choose a subject,” Shawn said. “I don’t have outlines or notecards. It’s more like a sentence comes to me and maybe a few months later I figure out who said it and why. I don’t pick the subjects. I don’t even know who’s talking. Eventually it’s something. After if it becomes something, I can sort of help it become the essence of what it is.”

My next question was blunt: You were in Southland Tales. What was that about?

“It was probably a lot of things at the same time,” Shawn said. “One of them that you can’t possibly question is that it’s not supposed to be America today. But it provides some amazing portraits of America today. If somebody asks what was it like in those boom years, the crazy years under George W. Bush, you can probably say look at that party on the blimp in Southland Tales. That was what it was like. The scene on the boardwalk is kinda like what was it like back in the day when people were wandering around on the boardwalk.

“If you get into questioning it, you might never find the answers. If you take it for what it is, your minutes were well spent watching it. You have to give yourself to the film. To answer the questions either will never happen or it would take 20 viewings to answer. You don’t have to. If you don’t like it, you can leave after half an hour. But it’s worth a third time to watch it.”

Shawn enjoyed playing a rather glamorous man on the silver screen. “I loved my own character. I’ve never been in a film where I enjoyed my own look more than that. It was amazing,” he said.

E! and Entertainment Tonight always focus on the work out of the stars. How does Wallace Shawn keep in shape? What is his exercise routine?

“I live in a fifth floor walk up so that’s my beauty secret,” Shawn disclosed. “In order to go home, I have to perform an athletic feat.”

DAMN TWITTER

I hate Twitter. I won’t use Twitter.. Nothing makes Twitter more uncool is seeing senators ignoring a presidential speech with their bodies hunched over so they can Twitter on their iPhones. Good thing most of the senators are now orphans. If my mom caught me Twittering instead of paying attention to the president, she’d beat me with a plank from my campaign platform. There should be a fourth grade teacher going around the Capitol building and taking those iPhones away. How are we supposed to tell children they need to pay attention at major events when the millionaire politicians look like a pack of teenage girls. Sen. John McCain might as well pound the podium demanding the Jonas Brothers perform at his kids’ birthday parties.

Dear Meghan McCain. I read your blog about how hard it is to find a great guy to date. Sorry to break the news, but I’m married. That means you’ll be settling for second best no matter what. So just go on Craigslist and email Mr. He’ll Do. Of course you can always wait for my upcoming Reality Show: “Mr. Big Love” where numerous women compete to be my really rich mistress.

BLU-RAY HEAVEN

Pinocchio: 70th Anniversary Edition Blu-ray is a major upgrade from the Golden Collection DVD. Walt Disney’s version of the fairytale about an old man who makes a wooden boy puppet that comes to life. The big problem is that the boy is still made out wood so he’s a bit of a freak. His only hope is to be good enough that the fairy will turn him into a flesh and blood boy. The Blu-ray picture is gorgeous. There’s an impulse to step through the screen to shoot pool at Pleasure Island. This is the standard of how to do an HD transfer of classic animation. The bonus features include “No Strings Attached.” The hour long documentary gets into the details of how Walt put together the film and its legacy. The deleted scenes are storyboards. They even dig up the live action reference footage used by the animators. We finally get to hear the “Honest John” song that was clipped early in production. They include a DVD of the new transfer for people who aren’t sure when they’re going to buy a Blu-ray, but want Pinocchio in the collection so they won’t have to wait for it to be re-released in a decade. Your nose will grow from the excitement of watching this in 1080p.

South Park: The Complete Twelfth Season Blu-ray keeps the caustic comedy coming from America’s favorite elementary schoolers. This is the season that brought back memories of Heavy Metal with “Major Boobage.” Kenny can slip into the fantasy world if he lets a cat fart in his face. Just when I thought smoking banana peels was the hot rage with little kids. “Britney’s New Look” really gets to the heart of TMZ’s round the clock coverage of the meltdown queen. We can laugh at this now that the press has declared that Britney is back. “About Last Night……” joins Obama and McCain in an Ocean’s 11 heist. It’s cute, but not cutting. The big bonus feature is “Six Days to South Park.” We get to follow the production details of an episode. They also show how they worked to give “Boobage” the Heavy Metal look. What’s really amazing is how this semi-primitive animation looks so stunning in Hi-Def. This must be how it looks on Matt & Trey’s megacomputer after its been rendered. The discs include a digital copy that’s only compatible with Windows media. Why no love for us Mac users?

Let The Right One In – Blu-ray is Twilight for grown ups. This Swedish import gives us a real teen romance involving a blood sucker that hasn’t been sanitized for clean living undead creatures. Oskar is a kid who gets extremely bullied at school. He’s a human punching bag. But things get better when he meets Eli. She’s a creepy yet cool girl. Oskar doesn’t quite understand the nature of his new friend. We’re given the horrible fear that she’s going to turn on him. Let’s face the simple fact, a girl has to get a drink from somebody. The blood effects are not for the weak of heart. For anyone who is sick of the Twilight hype, Let the Right One In is the real deal when it comes to fanged entertainment. It’ll spook you. The Blu-ray really sucks you into the chilly environment. You’ll want to break out your Snuggie.

Primal Fear: Hard Evidence Edition – Blu-ray brings back the moment when Ed Norton declared he was an actor you better damn well notice. He elevates what could have been another terminal Richard Gere film. Some people might want to give credit to the director, but what’s Gregory Hoblit done since this movie that you’ll admit to have paid to see? Norton is an altar boy accused of killing a Catholic Archbishop. His only hope is Richard Gere being his lawyer. The courtroom drama allows Norton to just take his character to the hilt. Is he guilty or being set up? He’s not going to let that define his performance. The Blu-ray really lets you get into Norton’s facial detail during telling scenes. The three bonus features discuss the complexity of spinning a courtroom tale with an intricate web of lies.

The Kite Runner – Blu-ray reminds us that are a lot of messed up people in Afghanistan. The first half of the film deals with the friendship between a poor child and a child of privilege. The rich kid’s family escapes the country when the Taliban take control. But his guilt drags him back to save his friend. The images are beautiful yet terrorizing. Watching this is 1080p makes you almost want to visit except when you discover the horrifying truth, you’ll never book passage. This is not a tourism board approved visit to greater Kabul. The big bonus feature is a commentary track with director Marc Forster (Quantum of Solace) and novelist Khaled Hosseini.

A Mighty Heart Blu-ray tells the true story of when Wall Street Journalist Daniel Pear was kidnapped while working on a story in Pakistan. His pregnant wife (played by Angelina Jolie) is in a frantic race against time to free him before the worst can happen. Will he be rescued in time to see his baby’s birth? I won’t give away the ending in case you’ve somehow avoided read a newspaper over the last decade. Director Michael Winterbottom and his crew keep the action gritty. This comes out in the 1080p transfer. You feel the dust kicking up as feet race around. The big bonus feature is a 30 minute behind the scenes documentary. Everyone sticks to the serious nature of the film. There’s even a public service announcement about protecting journalists. Seeking the truth in a warzone is a very dangerous proposal.

Things We Lost in the Fire – Blu-ray is a small film that deserves bigger attention. Halle Berry’s life has been destroyed by an act of violence. Benicio Del Toro (Che) arrives to help her out. However he’s not the most stable of guys. He’s got demons to battle every day. It’s an emotionally raw film with these two Oscar winners pushing each other to the edge. This was Berry’s proof that Monsters Ball wasn’t a fluke. She’s got skills. “A Discussion” gets down to the characters in this behind the scenes view. Seeing it in Blu-ray lets you appreciate the human qualities of these characters.

DVD SHELF

Andy Richter Controls the Universe: The Complete Series brings together all 19 episodes that were stretched over two seasons including 5 that never aired on Fox. Richter is a writer at a major corporation with an over active imagination. He dreams of wearing a suit of puppies into the office. “Little Andy in Charge” has him finally hook up with a hot woman. The trouble happens when he discovers she’s an anti-Semite. In order to feel good about the sex, he volunteers at a local Jewish center. Can this compromise between his big brain and his package work? Or will it explode in a bad way? The show deserved a longer run, but such is the curse of being non-animated comedy on Fox.

The Fugitive: Season Two, Volume Two keeps the manhunt of Dr. Richard Kimble (David Janssen) going for another 15 episodes.. For those wondering, they’ve kept a majority of the original score. Only a few musical moments have been replaced. “Brass Ring” has Robert Duvall as wheelchair bound guy who runs a merry-go-round with his sister (Angie Dickinson). Kimble helps them out and gets a heaping of Angie. However he’s being set up as a patsy for a nasty crime. “Nicest Fella You’d Ever Want to Meet” proves that Tom Skerritt (Alien) and Dabney Coleman were young. “Fun and Games and Party Favors” gets a thumbs up for the title. “Everybody Gets Hit in the Mouth Sometimes” makes Kimble drive a truck for Jack Klugman (The Odd Couple). This paranoid show is still great viewing.

J.A.G.: The Eighth Season opens with an extreme change in a cast member when Bud gets his legs blown off in “Critical Condition.” This is a series that doesn’t mess around. I’ve seen shows swap actors or kill them or have them go off to London for acting school. But to go Lt. Dan on a character? That’s intense military action. The other major highlight of the season is “Ice Queen.” It introduces NCSI to the world. Mark Harmon (Summer School) and David McCullam (Man From U.N.C.L.E.) would become major TV stars once more in this military spin-off. They made 10 seasons of J.A.G. so only two more to go before Catherine Bell gets discharged.

To Catch A Thief: Centennial Collection is Hitchcock bringing the cool to the French Riviera. Cary Grant is a retired jewel thief who finds his old tactics being used by a copycat. Or is he lying to us? He gets tangled up with Grace Kelly in a suave adventure. The second disc has dozens of extra features. “Unacceptable Under the Code” details how the film had to battle the MPAA censors to get away with fireworks. “A Night with the Hitchcocks” has Alfred’s daughter and granddaughter talk about their time with him. There’s a really shocking tale of what happened to the love birds from The Birds. We get a great sense of what went into this production that was mostly shot on location.

The Odd Couple: Centennial Collection brings a fresh transfer to the movie that truly made Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon an iconic couple (Fortune Cookie didn’t break them that much). Matthau is Oscar, a messy sports reporter. Lemmon is his anal pal Felix. He’s been dumped by his wife and about to jump when he’s saved by Oscar. The two become roommates and the clutter clash goes into overdrive. The best part of the film is how it reminds us of the importance of Poker night. The bonus features deal with how the Broadway play was transformed into the hit film. Did you know the set from the film was used in the first season of The Odd Couple TV series? Matthau and Lemmon’s sons contribute the commentary track.

Living With the Wolfman follows Shaun Ellis and Helen Jeffs hanging out with wolves. They do look like sweet doggies, but they can turn fierce fast. The show is graphic when showing how wolves tear apart a deer. You might not want kids who love Bambi to get a gander. The eight part series gives a great sense of what wolves are really like in the wild and semi-contained environments. He feeds them roadkill. Shaun is a rather intense looking guy who could easily end up at a UFC match. Do you think this guy ever saw Lucan as a kid?

Raw Nature is a five part series that brings dangerous lives of animals. There’s no petting zoo footage here. This is about man decided to move into areas once dominated by predator creatures like sharks, rhinos, anacondas and lions. A pack of adventure filmmakers take us into these animal hotzones. It’s like Marlon Perkins to the extreme. No wimpy and cute critters will be exposed on this DVD.

A Woman Called Golda was one of the last projects from Ingrid Bergman (Casablanca). She plays Golda Mier, a young girl from Milwaukee who rose up to help found Israel. Judy Davis (Barton Fink) plays the younger Golda. Robert Loggia (The Sopranos) plays Anwar Sadat. It’s a strange piece of casting only topped by Nigel Hawthrone (The Madness of King George) as King Abdullah.. Leonard Nimoy (Mr. Spock) is properly cast as Morris Meyerson. He really is Jewish. It’s got all the flourishes expected in a TV movie that maintains enough historical accuracy to keep everyone happy.

Sidney Sheldon’s Master of the Game was from the golden mini-series age of the early ’80s. Dyan Cannon is a ruthless woman who won’t hold back. She’s mean as she runs her empire. She steals husbands. Destroys her own son (Harry Hamlin). She wants her granddaughter take over not only her company, but attitude. It’s like reading a trashy beach novel except without the fear of getting a suntan. Cannon would go on to be the most annoying fan at LA Lakers games.

Elmo and Friends: Tales of Adventure gives us three slices of Sesame Street that will thrill small children. Elmo’s Amazing Alphabet Race has the little red wonder going against the clock to get from A to Z. Hopefully he won’t be looking for those lost letters. Golden Triangle of Destiny gives Texas Telly a leading role. He’s wearing his semi-Indiana Jones gear while keeping the education action coming.. He’s looking for certain shapes. The Adventures of Little Big Bird has the big yellow pal get shrunk down to a few inches high. Can he survive life on the street when he’s small enough to fall through society’s crack? This DVD is only available at Target.

Jim Gaffigan: King Baby gives us the uncut special that recently ran on Comedy Central. He’s more than just a pitchman for Sierra Mist. My favorite part of the routine is when he talks to us about bacon. “Yeah bacon.” He knows the secret of bacon and how anything can be improved if wrapped in bacon. “Bacon bits are the fairy dust of food.” Mmmmm bacon. How can you not like a comic who loves bacon? More bacon comedy. The DVD also includes episodes of Pale Force and Our Massive Planet. Get to know Gaffigan, your new bacon buddy.

Secrets of the Furious Five is a thirty minute special featuring the cast of Kung Fu Panda. We learn the secret origins of the other five fighters that backed the Panda in his feature film debut. The Panda has to teach a bunch of little kids and uses his pals’ origins as inspiration that all buttkickers start small. Jack Black and Dustin Hoffman return to their character voices.

GIVEAWAY ON THE RUN

CBS DVD is allowing 5 lucky readers to win a copy of The Fugitive: Season Two, Volume Two. All you have to do is answer this simple question: What faceless star of the Fugitive went on to his own Quinn-Martin series? Send your answer along with your name and address to mokaha@aol.com. The staff of Party Favors, Richard Diamond and Harrison Ford are not eligible to win.

Genius Entertainment and Sesame Street want 5 other lucky readers to win a copy of Elmo and Friends: Tales of Adventure. All you have to do is tell me what Muppet was featured in my Creepy PA segment of the Party Favors. Send you answer along with your name and address to mokaha@aol.com. The staff of the Party Favors, Buddy & Jim and Mr. Hopper are not eligible to win. Both contests end March 24. Good luck.

March 18, 2009
Party Favors: Smile A Smile

GRAND BAHAMA ISLAND – Why do critic groups ignore the finest moment in cinema this year? Can anyone rate up with Anna Faris’ performance in Smiley Face? Could Meryl Streep or Kate Winslet have pulled off playing an entire movie as if they ate a dozen cupcakes loaded with pot? Nope. But Anna is amazing in the most messed up role of the year that doesn’t involve being naked near Mickey Rourke.

Faris’ imaginary conversations with the late Roscoe Lee Browne (Soap) should be taught in acting schools. She has a magical blankness in the stare when keeps zoning out. Her ability to run like a cast member of Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp must be praised. It’s hard to believe that Faris didn’t rehearse the entire film after smoking a Tommy Chong-sized joint to memorize her actions for when the cameras rolled. It’s hard to maintain a buzz while waiting for the gaffer to tweak the lamps. Although I’ll guess that at the wrap party, every gaffer wanted to get high with her.

Some may argue that this is a 2007 release based on an extremely light theatrical release. Where did this film play? A peep show booth in Butte, Montana? If Roger Ebert can list films that came out in 2007 as a best of 2008, so can I. Does this film play well on the big screen> It’s the perfect size for my TV when it routinely pops up on pay channels at 2 a.m.

Smiley Face is a stoner film with a proper warning message to the kids. There is a danger to eating pot laced baked goods. They create a vicious circle since you get high, you have the munches so you eat more pot laced cupcakes and get even more high. And that leads to eating more cupcakes. It’s not a pretty picture when you become “motion sensitive.” Also getting really high and attempting to bake more pot cupcakes isn’t a good idea. These are drug education messages that kids really need to know. Don’t bake and bake.

The movie is loaded with plenty of famous cameos like The Love Boat smashing into Reefer Madness. Marion Ross looks ready to star in Happy Days: The Next Generation. Fans of The Office will finally know what Jim looks like while spanking off in the shower. He goes full release face on camera. Likewise The ’70s Show viewers will be scarred while watching Hyde humping a skull. The most stomach retching moment is merely a close up of Carrot Top.

I was going to link to the trailer, but it’s horrible. Just program your Tivo to snag it next time Smiley Face airs on your cable box.

Instead of an Oscar, Anna Faris deserves a postage stamp in Jamaica for Smiley Face. She’s the Queen of Comedy this year.

I’M BROKE LIKE ERIC ROTH

Bernie Madoff stole 2.3 billion dollars from the Party Favors Global Lengthwise Fold Charity Fund. I should have invested the money in Jar-Jar Binks Beanie Babies. I feel bad for all the school children who sent me their pennies in order to make the world a better place for strippers. But do we really expect someone like Madoff to care about the kids or the strippers?

This is what I deserve from believing the hype that Steven Spielberg is the smartest man in Showbiz. He put his holocaust charity bucks into the secure hands of Bernie. Why would Spielberg get fooled? Of course he’ll get his fat dough back when his musical production of the Flintstones hits Broadway. Or will that money be sent to Steven Spielrock’s Swiss bank account?

For all the talk about how lame and tired Hollywood is when it comes to recycling films; is there more creatively desolate landscape than the Great Blight Way? Why do they keep turning bad films into lame Broadway shows? Xanadu and Christine weren’t emotional rollercoasters begging for the stage. Did anyone really want Young Frankenstein to exist without Gene Wilder and Peter Boyle?

When a creatively bankrupt producer decides to remake a crappy film with bigger stars, they’re only forcing actors to do it once to capture it on celluloid (or HD). But a Broadway producer gets sadistic as they make actors repeat their performances each night to earn their bucks. Will Smith didn’t have to endure Wild Wild West the entire summer. Although that could be a good “community service punishment” for the crime known as Hancock.

Should the legit theater Marquees hype movie titles that belong at the buck cinema? Maybe next season we’ll get musical versions of Billy Madison, Jurassic Park 3 and Transformers.

CRYPT KEEPER’S BALL

“Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve With Ryan Seacrest” needs to have a Highlander moment. There can only be one name in that title. For once, I’m not rooting for Ryan to have his head chopped off by the World’s Oldest Teenager.

Ever since Dick survived his stroke a few years back, he’s insisted at being a part of the show> He sits in the warm confines of an indoor studio with a view of the Times Square action. It’s a sweet reminder that Dick has been a constant host for over 35 years on that special night. But his post-stroke appearances make him less animated than the Cryptkeeper.

I wouldn’t mind a kiss and wave moment from Dick right before the ball drops. Or a pre-recorded introduction for the hot new band. But Dick insists on giving himself prime chunks of live air time to chit chat with Ryan. It’s really hard to listen since he’s still in severe speech therapy mode. He’s not broadcast quality. If he was on Entertainment Tonight, they’d subtitle the interview. Dick Clark the producer would never allow a TV personality with the same issues as Dick Clark that much time on the air.

Perhaps it is the desire to host another New Year’s Eve show is what keeps the 79 year-old Dick Clark alive. But he kills the fun when he arrives on the TV screen. People at home are in a partying mood. They tune into the broadcast to know exactly when the ball drops instead of counting on a drunk hostess’ cuckoo clock that’s five minutes fast. They have champagne flowing and lips ready for kissing. And then there’s Dick Clark speaking like Frankenstein’s Monster. “Fire bad when Jonas Brothers follow Doobie Brothers.”

Dick needs to realize that he’s old enough to let go of this part of his life. I also give this advice to Carson Daly. He was outshined by a smashed beer cup. Kathy Griffin’s naughty moment on CNN about slapping something out a heckler’s mouth was such a letdown since it’s such an old rip. She needs to get with the 21st Century. She could have at least claimed the guy worked as a taste tester at Analeze.

SHOW IT

When is Bravo going to have The Real Househusbands of the Internet? Or are guys smart enough to avoid having their child raising skills hidden from the public?

My scummy source in the adult industry has told me that the hottest “get” celebrities are the older daughters from a certain reality TV family. “Duggar Girls: 69 and Counting” could easily outpace sales of Nailin’ Palin. John and Katie: Goin’ For Nine is their dream back up title.

VINCE SELLS IT

America has its second great TV pitchman. Vince selling the Shamwow and Slap Chop is moving into Billy Mays hallowed turf. Vince rocks the headset mic and has no problem going off the script during the demo. He shows us that his products make you want to party. What gets me is that he’s not merely talking to me, but giving business to the camera guy.

Plus he knows we all love his nuts.

What the hell is Vince’s last name? Perhaps that’s what makes him such a mysterious guy even after all those amazing things he tells us about the product. He seems to be like Tom Cruise’s Vince in The Color of Money. He’s the rock and roll hustler as seen on TV. Rumor has it that he’s Vince Offer, who directed The Underground Comedy Movie. Remember that movie being advertised on TV?

It’s good to have two Americans selling to us instead of importing another snotty Englishman. I don’t see Vince as competition for Billy Mays, but a tag-team pal during the marathon commercial breaks. Odds are that Billy still has a shot at a political career as a Vice President. Somebody ought to do a spoof of The Color Of Money with Billy Mays as Fast Eddie and Vince as Vince. Or maybe Ron Popeil training Vince to take on Billy Mays at a swap meet showdown? You can still call it “The Color of Money.” Or “How Long Was My Pocketfisherman?”

BURN IT OFF

Is Jillian Reynolds (formerly Barberie) dark enough to get her own Univision sitcom? Did I miss the memo that she’s up for the lead for Broadway’s adaptation of Spanglish? She needs to get on Celebrity Rehab in order break her tanning habit. George Hamilton has volunteered to conduct the Intervention episode. For her own good, she needs to lighten up.

BOTH SIDE OF THE ROAD

North Carolina Beats Duke is the perfect gift for UNC basketball fans. The boxset contains three complete games featuring the Tarheels pulling out tight wins over Coach K. and his Blue Devils. A contest from March 1984 has Michael Jordan taking Duke into two overtimes before claiming victory for Dean Smith. The second game is from 1992 when UNC spanked Christian Laettner. The guy choked on the charity stripe with the game on the line. Tarheel’s center Eric Montross iced the game with blood dripping from his face. They don’t let you play with bleeding wounds anymore. The final game is from 1995 when Rasheed Wallace and Jerry Stackhouse shut up the Cameron Crazies in another double overtime game. These are the original broadcasts with all the action and none of the car ads.

Duke Beats Carolina gives the other side of the Tobacco Road Rivalry. Now if you cheer for Coach K, you’ll get glee seeing UNC’s whine and cheese crowd crying in their cushy leather courtside seats. A game from 2000 has Shane Battier and Carlos Boozer deflating the Dean Dome in overtime. From 2004 comes the first Coach K vs. Roy Williams battle. Guess who pulls this one out in overtime. The final game is a nail biter with J.J. Redick following the coach’s plan. Both sets will get you extremely excited even though you know the outcome.

BLU-RAY HEAVEN

Without A Paddle: Nature’s Calling Blu-Ray deserves high definition love just for the shot of a squirrel chugging straight out of the keg. This is not really a sequel to the original film that starred Seth Green and Dax Shepard. This has two relatively unknown actors heading into the wilderness in pursuit of an almost lost love. It’s just complete goofiness that has a greenie message since the love interest wants to save nature. The film also stars NFL Hall of Famer Jerry Rice. The San Francisco legend is now a thespian. Perhaps soon the dancing wide receiver will be making a Tyler Perry film. The highlight of the movie is the squirrel attacking a keg like a sophomore at Party Headquarters. The bonus features include a blooper reel that shows Rice is ready to challenge Howie Long in the acting field. “The Furious Nuts” short gives us the truth behind working with squirrels.

DVD SHELF

Matlock: The Second Season brings more deep fried Southern-style law from Andy Griffith. The big change for this sophomore outing is Matlock’s daughter (Linda Purl) splitting for Philadelphia. He hires Cassie Phillips (Kari Lizer) to be his legal back up. Tyler Hudson (Kene Holliday) is back as his real feet on the ground when it comes to finding the evil people who set up Matlock’s clients. There’s numerous recognizable guest stars in this boxset. Billy Mumy is no longer Lost In Space when he lands in “The Genius.” Ralph Bellamy, Robert Culp and Scott Bakula mix it up in “The Power Brokers.” “The Annihilator” stars Dick Butkus as a pro wrestler accused of killing his ring rival. Chick Hearn announces the action. Only seven more seasons left to complete the series.

This American Life: The Second Season features another 6 installments of the popular NPR radio series brought to video by Showtime. The highlight is “John Smith” which attempts to tell the story of a life using numerous John Smiths of various ages from across America. It’s an engrossing experiment. A single life does come out of these same name participants. “Going Down In History” examines a jail break with the convicts using dental floss to make their escape rope. Ira Glass really needs to make more of these episodes. This American Life The Second Season is exclusively being sold at Borders bookstores.

Funny Face – Paramount Centennial Collection shares a blissful 103 minutes with Audrey Hepburn. She’s swooped up from her lowly bookstore job to become a super model in Paris. Her photographer is Fred Astaire. The music and dancing propels this movie into the high fashion zenith. Audrey strikes more perfect poses than a season of America’s Next Top Model. The 2 DVD set includes a bonus feature about Vistavision that should be seen by fans of cinematography. Learn the secret of the film that went through the camera sidewise. “Kay Thompson: ‘Think Pink’” reveals the life of this amazing performer. “The Fashion Designer and His Muse” exposes the wardrobe love between fashion designer Herbert de Givenchy and Hepburn.

Breakfast at Tiffany’s – Paramount Centennial Collection is the ultimate Manhattan partygirl movie. Holly Golightly (Audrey Hepburn) is a force of nature who bursts into her neighbor’s life. Paul Varjak (George Peppard) is a writer who slowly discovers the truth about the girl who recreated herself for the Big Apple scene. Their strange romance plays out with Henry Mancini’s lush score and “Moon River” song. The only bad move in the film is the casting of Mickey Rooney as a Japanese neighbor. It’s a squirm time when he’s on the screen. There’s a great array of bonus features on the two disc set including a history of the film and Tiffany’s. “Mr. Yunioshi: An Asian Perspective” allows people to complain about Mickey Rooney’s role in the film. “Behind the Gates: The Tour” is a quicky trip around Paramount studio.

My Three Sons, The First Season, Volume Two allows us 18 more episodes that bask in the greatness of William Frawley. What happens when Fred Mertz (I Love Lucy) has to raise three boys while their absentee father spends why too much time at work and working the ladies? You get the best grandfather in TV history in Frawley. As I watch these episodes, I really hate Fred McMurray. Sure he means well with his sons, but there’s a strange distance between them. This boxset contains the final 18 episodes of the first season. “Man in a Trenchcoat” has dad away for the night (big surprise) and the kids get creeped out by a stranger. Dad thinks his son is spy crazy. “Organization Woman” has McMurrary’s sister arrive and mess up William Frawley’s routines. “The Horseless Saddle” has Frawley get a saddle in the mail. Is this a secret message from Ethel? The shows switch in tone from comical to serious family dramas so you never quite know what to expect.

Walker, Texas Ranger The Complete Sixth Season opens up another can of Chuck Norris whoopass. Why did criminals even think of coming to Texas? Didn’t they know after five seasons that they had no chance of being a success? Chuck isn’t always about knocking heads with his cowboy boots. “Lucas” has him helping a boy stricken with AIDS find his mother. “Brainchild” has a super genius kid forcing Walker to help him find his mother. He was all about finding some mommies this season. Walker busts up illegal medical testing on nursing home patients in “Forgotten People.” “The Last of a Breed” has Norris play a legendary Texas Ranger. He’s diverse that way. John Beck (Rollerball‘s Moonpie) pops up at “Rainbow’s End.” Chuck Norris lands 23 episodes of kung fu crime fighting that Conan O’Brien will love.

Burn After Reading would have been a complete disappointment except for a genius case of casting. Sledge Hammer (David Rasche) and Oz‘s Vern Schillinger (J.K. Simmons) finally meet. It’s the rabid lawman reporting to the Aryan Brotherhood’s main man. Good versus evil meet over a desk at the CIA headquarters. Did the Coen Brothers really know what they were doing? This goes up with Donald Duck and Daffy Duck facing off in Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Although it’ll be nice when the Coen brothers decide to show us the third act play out.

January 7, 2009