FRED Entertainment

May 23, 2008

Trailer Park: Why Your Indiana Jones Isn’t As Good As Mine

Filed under: Trailer Park — admin @ 3:07 am

By Christopher Stipp

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I’m awesome. I wrote a book. It’s got little to do with movies. Download and read “Thank You, Goodnight” right HERE for free.

This is going to be different than an “I told you so” but looking at what I had to say about THE INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL trailer I can say with a bitty bit of confidence that no matter what you think of my solipsistic, ape-like ability to hammer this column out every single week there is a little bit of truth that I am able to eek out of these trailers which can, unfortunately, be quite revealing to me about why I have reservations about some of the most anticipated films.

I damn near feel like one of those carnival barkers on Saturday mornings in between many a sports show admonishing you to call call call right now to get my free pick of the week. My ability to write about this crap certainly has been pleasurable every single week (sometimes) but it’s never fun to be disappointed at what most people would consider to be the messiah in celluloid shape.

What seems to be the problem many critics are now having with JONES seems to be the very thing which is bright as any halogen spotlight in that trailer. This isn’t a review of the film but when I had the chance to be a part of the Sunday preview this week I just passed at the opportunity in lieu of hanging with 2 dozen mutant children at a birthday party; I didn’t have any inside information about the film but after these trailers and television spots I thought I pretty much knew what to expect.

After reading the reviews that have slowly been oozing their way across the Intertubes I can’t say that I’m kicking myself for making the choice that I did. Certainly, all the hubbub regarding what in fact the crystal skull was and all the bullshit Cease and Desist letters that many sites were using as reasons for taking down images readily available (for anyone who needs a quick legal lesson on Cease and Desist letters for film sites here it is: They are calls/e-mails from studio representatives which provide access to these sites and they are done so as to preserve the movie slave’s free flow of information, to ensure their junket invite still arrives on time, that they’re still allowed to participate in set visits, etc…Just imagine what it would be like if the drama club were actually cool, that this was still high school and that the drama club was the one thing everyone wanted to be in.) and all the hoopla about a movie, if you looked at it close enough, wasn’t that thrilling.

I guess it smarts in a way that this movie has fallen short of unreachable expectations, no one likes to see Harrison Ford ambling around like a grandfather in a role known for lots of physicality, but the fact is that he’s getting up there in age, we’ve all grown up (some of us) and anyone who can look at this franchise with the same awe and wonder as many of us do to the first three films (and, really, let’s all face facts regarding the 3rd installment) and just leave it at that? No, because that would be admitting that there is something inherently wrong about the character but these do not have to be mutually exclusive movies. You can have a clunker in there and still retain that Soul Glo of the trilogy but I think, and I am writing this on Monday night as many of the critics are unleashing their reviews, you will see a lot of that nostalgia permeate the very same reviews which should stand alone; you can’t really tie this 4th installment to the other three as it would be just as unfair to besmirch the good name of STAR WARS just because PHANTOM MENACE was a piece of dog shit.

That’s just me, though, and I realize many of you are already sold on what is the next messiah on celluloid. If you could do me an honest favor, bookmark this rant and come back to me next year when you’ve had a chance to really soak in the film and let me know if I’m wrong? I would like nothing more than than to say this 4th part is just as worthy to stand next to the 3rd, not just as a good action movie, we all know Spielberg can crap those out on a whim, but a movie that still genuinely embodies that sense of mid-century adventure when serials and mindless derring-do was the thing that made movies fun.

Somehow I think that bit will be lost in all the marketing.

SANGRE DE MI SANGRE (2008)

Director: Christopher Zalla
Cast: Armando Hernandez, Jorge Adrian Espindola, Jesus Ochoa, Paola Mendoza
Release:
May 16, 2008
Synopsis: Winner of the Best Film at the Sundance Film Festival (under its former title Padre Nuestro), SANGRE DE MI SANGRE is an exhilarating and provocative thriller from newcomer Christopher Zalla exposing the dark side of the American dream. A young Mexican immigrant, Pedro (Jorge Adrian Espindola), journeys to New York City in search of the successful father he’s never met only to have his belongings and identity stolen by a conniving thief, Juan (Armando Hernandez). As Pedro is left alone and unable to communicate in a country foreign to him, Juan cons his way into the home of Pedro’s father, Diego (Jesus Ochoa), finding a man just as flawed as he is. While Juan attempts to reinvent himself, Pedro’s only hope lies with a mysteriously complex prostitute, Magda (Paola Mendoza), as he frantically searches for his identity back.

View Trailer:
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Prognosis: Positive. Arizona is a funky kind of place to live.

When you’re here, it feels like any other dustbowl that gets to 120 in the July without even trying, it looks like any other cramped and forced suburbia where the homes are all made out of stucco and are no more than 10 feet apart and it has a way of looking desperate and isolated when you fly in here and see that we’re literally one big mass surrounded by an unforgiving desert of nothingness.

Plus, we’re pretty much a lightning rod for immigration reform.

You’ve got some yahoos on one side saying that all illegals should be tossed back to Mexico, you’ve got others who say that English as a Second Language programs should be a part of the state funded curriculum and you even have lots of people debating the merits of whether illegals should be allowed to partake of government programs. On a daily basis this debate rages on in the news but all I want to know is whether the Cubs won another game. That said, though, this movie looks absolutely amazing with regard to getting down to the dangers of what happens when Mexicans want to try and make a go at life here in America, illegally, and run into the kind of drophouse scenarios that happen on a routine basis.

When we open on this trailer we thankfully have a voice over that’s not intrusive as it is helpful to explain what we have: simply, one Mexican meets another on their way to a better life in America. Simple, cut and dry.

What’s more is that the story gets thrilling and even exciting for me when the voice over lets us know that this is a tale of one kid who is genuinely looking for his father in New York while the other guy plans to take advantage of this and beat him to it, and exploit the situation to his favor. I damn near get my jollies when we see that the bad guy beat the other to the punch and we’re instantly tossed to the Sundance, Winner, Best Film logo. Brilliant. It’s perfectly placed, it comes at just the right time and you are unable to do anything else but watch further to find out what is going to happen next.

What follows, the guy supping at this other kid’s father like a leech by taking money and comfort from this unsuspecting dude who thinks this is his son, is delicately followed by positive reviews from the Los Angeles Times, Boston Globe and others. In this trailer it just helps to keep the visibility and credibility of what it’s trying to sell you. And, as you see the kid who really is the guy’s father hot on the tail of the weasel who is bilking him, the tension is wonderfully understated but wholly present.

The subsequent cut scenes that follow when the OG child finds out another has been sleeping in his bed and eating his porridge run rings around any thriller that I have had the misfortune to try to be sold on this year; I’m really concerned about who is going to beat who to the literal punch by the time all is revealed at the end. I’m just as ready to fork over my cash at the end of this trailer as anyone else should be to find out how this all plays out.

BAGHEAD (2008)

Director: Jay Duplass, Mark Duplass
Cast: Steve Zissis, Ross Partridge, Greta Gerwig, Elise Muller
Release:
June 13, 2008
Synopsis: While the Duplass Brothers were shooting their last feature film The Puffy Chair, a crew member raised the question “what’s the scariest thing you can think of?” Someone immediately said “a guy with a bag on his head staring into your window.” Some agreed, but some thought it was downright ridiculous and, if anything, funny (but definitely not scary). Thus, BAGHEAD was born, an attempt to take the absurdly low-concept idea of a “guy with a bag on his head” and make a funny, truthful, endearing film that, maybe, just maybe, was a little bit scary, too.

View Trailer:
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Prognosis: Positive. Brilliant.

I swear, you do enough of these trailer reviews and you start to wonder whether it is possible to be original and fresh with regard to making you feel connected to a film and energize you to open your mind to what’s on the screen. I’m here to say that it is possible and that this trailer deserves a few viewings in order to see how good this thing is built from the ground up.

First, you have a plucky musical score behind the opening sequence. It sets the mood perfectly as we open on a car rolling down an empty and hollow road. As well, we’re entertained to the entire plot of the movie. We hear why these people are where they are, why it’s important to keep tuned in and why this makes a good movie. Hell, we get it all of this within the first 10 seconds.

This is the first reason why this trailer is great.

Second, boom, we’re hit with the Official Sundance logo. Perfect, perfect, perfect. I realize no one of great importance reads this column but I am thankful to the silent stars that someone gets the notion that you need to put these accolades in the front, not to bury it in the middle or end when I’ve made up my mind to forget your film. This just helps to solidify the pedigree of the movie and it works even better, as this trailer does, when we’re smacked with the idea that the movie these four people are going to make in the woods comes about due to a dream. Or is it?

This is the second reason why this trailer is great.

As we entrench ourselves into the unique and very original premise of this film there is a sense of interest I don’t usually get out of my trailers. I actually found myself glued to what was coming next. The baghead premise is one that is both funny and scary when you feel like something’s not going to turn out right. When one of the four members of the film shoot for the weekend express a desire to have his part written as the romantic interest of one of the ladies in the group you can already feel the double tension building.

The quotes, the many many quotes, genuinely help to ballast the reputation of this film’s thesis that it’s a film worth watching in its entirety. The tension then continues to build between the guys for the affections of the ladies and then the grizzly idea that this baghead is indeed a psychopathic element that is actually happening. It’s funny, to be sure, when one of the ladies meets with a baghead (Is he/she real? Is someone really going to die?) only to admit at the breakfast table when no one fesses up to them being it that the baghead, then, has seen her naked. It’s funny/scary at the same time.

The ending’s quick cuts, normally a bane of every shitty and shoddy trailer which employs them, actually increases the uneasy sense that this movie is more than just about 4 people wanting to make a movie; it seems like a bizarre combination to have but this really does seem like a tasty Twix and Oreo combo with a hearty glass of milk.

Yum.

BIGGER, STRONGER, FASTER* (2008)

Director: Christopher Bell
Cast: Hulk Hogan, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone
Release:
May 30, 2008
Synopsis: In America, we define ourselves in the superlative: we are the biggest, strongest, fastest country in the world. We reward speed, size and above all else: winning – at sport, at business and at war. Metaphorically we are a nation on steroids. Is it any wonder that so many of our heroes are on performance enhancing drugs? From the producers of Bowling For Columbine and Fahrenheit 9/11 comes a new film that unflinchingly explores our win-at-all-cost culture through the lens of a personal journey. Blending comedy and pathos, BIGGER, STRONGER, FASTER* is a collision of pop culture, animated sequences and first-person narrative, with a diverse cast including US Congressmen, professional athletes, medical experts and everyday gym rats. At its heart, this is the story of director Christopher Bell and his two brothers, who grew up idolizing muscular giants like Hulk Hogan, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger, and who went on to become members of the steroid-subculture in an effort to realize their American dream. When you discover that your heroes have all broken the rules, do you follow the rules, or do you follow your heroes?

View Trailer:
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Prognosis: Positive. Goddamn!

I’d like to consider myself worldly enough in assuming that I’ve seen almost anything and everything. I realize the occasional off-beat news story about some high school PE teacher having her way with a female student is the one off exception to that rule, however, a trailer like this that repulses me from the get go deserves the distinction of WTF Of The Week.

When we meet Valentino, a meathead of the very highest order, rank and distinction, he is perhaps the one thing that could have drew me in to seeing INDIANA JONES the very first week of release. Since he isn’t, and he’s in this documentary, you can bet my jones is finding out how a freak like this guy literally was able to make his bicep bigger than the vertical circumference of his head. If you’re not impressed by this guy’s addiction to steroid use you need to lay off those fetish porn sites.

Valentino’s further introduction, made quite personal by his real honest interview where he’s the first to admit that his freakish appearance does not impress the ladies, anchors this documentary in a space where it’s less sensational than it is an examination into what might be at the forefront for the culture of physical power we’ve seemed to engender here in America.

I will say from an aesthetic point of view this trailer goes further than the MTV, True Life-ization, surface investigation into what makes steroids such an attractive alternative to these men who think that their idols such as Arnold Schwarzenegger and Hulk Hogan were physical templates they needed to live up to, literally, and they incorporate war imagery in a way that makes me pause for a moment. I don’t quite know how initially the two square but as the narrative unfurls a little further we see that this is an American culture we’re talking about, one where you need to be able and strike fast and hard. Without steroids, it seems to imply, there couldn’t have been a triumphant Rocky, a liberating Rambo or even a defeat of Andre the Giant.

It’s about at this point when we get “From the Producers Of BOWLING FOR COLUMBINE and FAHRENHEIT 9/11 that I have drank the Kool-Aid for this thesis; not that I’m any believer in the totality of either production, mind you. There were more than enough issues and factual misrepresentations and leaps of logic we all could back a Mack truck into but the way in which the information in those two films were presented at least had a nice gloss to it.

I’m even jolted back to sympathy when we get a voice over from one of three brothers who are profiled in this movie. When he comments that, as a bodybuilder, he was affected by the revelations that Hogan and his other heroes were absolutely taking things into their bodies to enhance their physical appearance that normal weight lifting simply could not do you are brought down to a genuine tale of conflict. And, when he says that two of his brothers currently do take steroids to enhance their physicality you can’t help but be affected by it.

As well, one of the things that bring this message home is perhaps one of the most point blank, reflexive questions: In order to provide for your family and in order to keep your job would you take steroids? I know for some of you who don’t have either this is a moot question but just softening your focus on this question and thinking of someone else other than yourself kind of brings this debate to one of personal responsibility and the What If questions that easily makes this trailer poignant if nothing else.

The hideous visage of a “woman” who is so obviously afflicted with small nuts and a dude’s voice is enough for any person to go clean, the hilarious steroid fueled cow is a sight that almost trumps Valentino’s bizarre in all its bizarre physicality and one air force pilot’s assertion that in sports you should play fair and, in war, you shouldn’t play fair at all. Again, it’s a flashy sound bite that made COLUMBINE and 9/11 such documentary darlings.

And, when, one guys talks about how people cheat to get ahead and they flash images of nutritional supplements and politicians, the video image of George Bush is enough to induce a few laughs.

May 21, 2008

Comics in Context #224: My Cinco de Mayo

Filed under: Comics in Context — admin @ 5:16 am

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cic2008-05-21-01.jpgThis week I was going to plug my new course at New York University’s School of Continuing and Professional Studies: “The Superhero as American Icon.” But then last week I received bad news: only two people had signed up for the course, so NYU was canceling it. This keeps happening. Where is this wave of serious interest in the comics medium that I keep hearing about?

Well, I saw that wave–a tidal wave–hit on the fifth of May. That was the day that I attended the press opening of a new exhibit at the Metropolitan Museum of Art: “Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy.” Organized by curator Andrew Bolton for the Costume Institute, the Metropolitan’s department of fashion, this exhibition explores similarities between superhero costumes and contemporary trends in fashion. (See the Met’s own online version of this exhibition here)

Moreover, the most glittering social event of the year in New York City is the Costume Institute’s annual gala. This year the gala was being held for the opening of “Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy” the night of May 5, mere hours after the press preview. Two of the co-chairs of the gala were Julia Roberts and George Clooney, who, of course, played Batman in the 1997 movie Batman and Robin.

So there I was, heading towards the Metropolitan on a beautifully sunny, warm spring morning, clutching the envelope with my invitation to the press preview. I was amazed when I first saw the invitation: it had a reproduction of artwork by none other than comics’ premier creator of painted illustrations, Alex Ross (Marvels, Kingdom Come, Justice).

Arriving on Fifth Avenue outside the Museum, I was excited to see a sign “Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy” hanging above the main entrance of America. This is the Metropolitan, America’s leading art museum, and one of the greatest art museums in the world, on a short list with the Louvre. And there on the Fifth Avenue facade were signs advertising the Met’s Courbet retrospective and its “Poussin and Nature” exhibition, and in the center, a sign about a show inspired by comics.

I expected to see that “Superheroes” sign; I did not expect what I saw as soon as I passed through the front doors. There, in the center of the Museum’s Great Hall, standing atop an immense pedestal, were statues of DC Comics’ trinity, Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman, twelve feet tall, towering above the arriving guests. It was a sight that I dare say none of us ever imagined we’d see in the main entrance hall of this temple of high art. Was this the Bizarro World’s Metropolitan?

Despite what the Beat wrote in her blog, the statues, which had temporarily displaced the visitor information desk, were there only for the day of the gala. I subsequently found out that for the Gala’s dinner that evening, the Met’s wing housing the ancient Temple of Dendur, transplanted from Egypt, was decorated with gigantic mock ice crystals to resemble the Fortress of Solitude from the Superman movies–again, for one day only.

Turning left in the Great Hall, I entered the long central gallery of the Greek and Roman wing, passing an ancient statue of a wounded Amazon, on my way to see a show dealing with Wonder Woman. How appropriate it is that visitors must enter a hall of statues of idealized bodies, in a wing featuring images of ancient gods and heroes, in order to make their way to the Special Exhibitions Gallery where the Met’s new exhibit hails those figures of modern pop mythology, comic book superheroes.

Indeed, “Superheroes'” first wall text, accompanied by a 1981 Superman print by Andy Warhol, curator Bolton demonstrates that he too understands the connection: “Like the biblical and mythological heroes who are their ancestors. superheroes have served as avatars of our hopes, dreams, and desires. Perhaps because they . . .evolved from comic books, superheroes have been dismissed as frivolous and superficial. But superheroes should not be underestimated. Their apparent triviality is the very thing that gives them the ability to address serious issues of merit and worth, that frees them to respond to and comment upon shifting attitudes toward self and society, toward identity and ideology.” Bolton continues, “The superhero is most effective as metaphor.” Yes. He Gets It.

And what is the connection between fashion and superhero comics, you may winder? The wall text states that fashion and the superhero genre both deal with “the power of transformation. Fashion, like the superhero, celebrates metamorphosis, providing unlimited opportunities to remake and reshape the flesh and the self.” (The wall texts also appear as parts of Bolton’s essays in the Met’s catalogue for the exhibit.) To dress up, to thereby adopt a more glamorous persona, or to don clothing that expresses a side of your personality that ordinary clothing does not, is like Clark Kent turning into Superman.

In fact, early in the show there is a display in which, through lighting tricks, a mannequin dressed as Clark Kent transforms before your eyes into one dressed in Christopher Reeve’s Superman uniform from the movies. DC Comics, Warner Brothers, and Marvel cooperated with the exhibition, which includes a good number of movie costumes, including Lynda Carter’s Wonder Woman uniform from the 1970s TV series (She attended the Gala that evening), Michelle Pfeiffer’s Catwoman costume from Batman Returns (1992), Christian Bale’s Batman uniform from The Dark Knight (2008), and even the second version of Iron Man’s armor from the new movie. Both Tobey Maguire’s red and blue costume and the black costume from Spider-Man 3 (2007) are on display; the mannequin in the black costume clings to the wall, reminding me of Kiki Smith’s black sculpture of Lilith in the Met’s modern art galleries. Atop a rotating pedestal is a mannequin covered with the appliances simulating blue-skinned nudity of the sort that Rebecca Romijn wore as Mystique in the X-Men movies.

Among the printed backdrops behind the costume displays are blown-up reproductions of Alex Ross artwork from JLA: Secret Origins (2002) for the Flash section, and from Batman: War on Crime (1999), behind the Bale uniform. Yes, Alex Ross’s work is now on display at the Met, and he gets credited for it, too, unlike certain other artists, as we shall see.

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There are a number of costumes in the exhibition that explicitly work variations on Superman’s “S” emblem. But the majority of the clothes in this show do not demonstrate direct influence from the comics. Rather, the “Superheroes” exhibition shows comic book artists and fashion designers following parallel paths in working along various themes. Hence, the section called “The Aerodynamic Body” compares the sleek uniform of the Silver Age Flash, suitable to a man who runs at super-speed, with bodysuits from Nike and Speedo intended for athletes. “The Patriotic Body” segment deals with American flag motifs in the uniforms of Captain America and Wonder Woman as well as costumes from the House of Dior. The Maguire Spider-Man costumes appear alongside fashions utilizing webbing motifs designed by Giorgio Armani, John Galliano, Jean Paul Gaultier, Thierry Mugler and others. (Armani even pointed out in an interview that he was not thinking of Spider-Man when he designed the costume in the show.)

cic2008-05-21-02.jpgThe athletic bodysuits serve a practical function. As for the other costumes in the show, it is hard to imagine anyone wearing them on the street. That is probably the point: this exhibit is about fashion as dressing up for display at parties and galas, for putting on alternate identities, not as practical everyday wear.

The fashion designers’ costumes are not only often entertainingly over the top, but in a number of cases delve into kinkiness. The show links Michelle Pfeiffer’s Catwoman costume, torn in intriguing places, to dominatrix garb, and the other mannequins in this display wear variations on that theme. Robert Downey Jr.’s Iron Man armor, its eyes and chest beam lit up, stands among female mannequins wearing “armored” costumes that, far from providing protection, expose vulnerable body parts, even the breasts.

The Beat described Lynda Carter’s Wonder Woman costume as comparatively demure in this company. I’d say that it has a simplicity and regality that most of the fashion designers’ costumes here lack. The Met’s show emphasizes the side of superhero fashion that pushes against the limits of social acceptability. (Indeed, during the press conference that morning, curator Andrew Bolton reportedly described the costumes in display as “extreme, phantasmagoric, hard edged, aggressive, overtly sexualized fashion.”) But superhero costumes, like Captain America’s, Wonder Woman’s and Superman’s, have an iconic dimension, setting to inspire audiences with visual representations of the community’s ideals. This is a side to superhero imagery that the Met’s show fails to address.

Before I could finish going through the entire exhibit, taking notes, everyone moved out the other end of the gallery to what is perhaps my favorite space within the Met, the Petrie Sculpture Court, for a press conference. This usually quiet, sparsely populated indoor courtyard was now packed with press representatives, with photographers jammed together along one side.

The first speaker was the third co-chair of the gala, Anna Wintour, the editor in chief of Vogue. The Beat has pointed out that Wintour was the only guest at the evening’s gala who came dressed in a way that genuinely evoked superhero costumes. Wintour was quoted as saying she came as Storm from X-Men, but seeing the photos of Wintour at the Gala, I realized she looked like a very different X-Men character: a real life version of Emma Frost, the White Queen, as originally drawn by John Byrne!

Wintour devoted her speech to praising Philippe de Montebello, who has served as director of the Metropolitan since 1977, longer than anyone else in its history, and who is retiring at the end of this year. (He’s going to be teaching at NYU!) “This will be Philippe’s last Costume Institute exhibit at the museum,” she pointed out. “Alone among world class museum directors,” Wintour asserted, de Montebello had “the vision to acknowledge the role that style, self-presentation, and design play in modern culture,” and has “executed that vision in a way that has inspired millions to think of fashion as one of our most complex and rich decorative arts.” She extolled de Montebello for giving his curators “the freedom to explore the connections between what we wear and how we live,” even though “the fashion world may not be his world,” and declared de Montebello to be “superheroic.”

This should remind us that there are other artforms besides our own–fashion, film, photography–that have had to struggle for serious recognition, and that it is important to have allies in the world of high culture who are open to recognizing what is important and enduring in popular culture. It’s rather wonderful from my standpoint that de Montebello’s final Costume Institute show also represents, as far as I know, the Met’s first dabbling into the artform of comics in a half century. (Readers of R. C. Harvey’s new biography of Milton Caniff will learn that the Met did a survey of American comics back in the 1950s, and still owns an original Caniff somewhere in its archives.)

Wintour then introduced de Montebello, who had not expected her lavish praise: “I have been accused of many things,” he said, “but loss of words was never one,” confessing that he felt “so utterly overwhelmed” and “surprised” by her speech. He returned her compliment, stating that Wintour “is our superheroine” in her contributions to the Costume Institute.

Agreeing with Wintour, de Montebello said that he “did not presume” to have “expertise in fashion,” but “I did give them quite free rein,” referring to the Costume Institute’s curators. De Montebello declared that the Costume Institute had proved itself to be “not an ancillary curatorial department but a full-fledged member of the academic part of this institution.”

Significantly, de Montebello made the point that art can come in a variety of forms. “Do they have to be rectangular or framed, or carved out of stone” he asked, “as opposed to being worn?” This too is a point applicable to our own artform.

Then, demonstrating that he too “got” one of the major points of the Superheroes” exhibition, de Montebello spoke of the nearby Greek and Roman wing (whose recent renovation and reinstallation is the crowning achievement of his long directorship), “which is filled with great mythic superheroes of ancient times.” He spoke of “the representations of Hercules” as the forebear of Superman, “or the huntress, Diana” which “led to Wonder Woman,” and pointed to Antonio Canova’s statue of Perseus, slayer of the Gorgon Medusa, standing before him in the Petrie Court.

Praising “the myth itself of Anna Wintour, who has co-chaired this event for the past ten years,” de Montebello then introduced “in our midst a true myth of this field,” the honorary co-chairman of the evening’s gala, and sponsor of both the exhibit and its catalogue, fashion designer Giorgio Armani.

Armani spoke in Italian, translated by a woman standing nearby. He confessed he’d lost the paper with his prepared speech, but told us he “will figure something out,” and proceeded to improvise quite well. He first thanked New York City for supporting his work for thirty years and remarked on the “love of fashion that imbues the city [New York] at all levels–rich people, not so rich people.”

Armani said he was “surprised” to be asked to sponsor this show, since he is famous for “a fashion that is worn mainly”; as I noted, one wouldn’t wear the outfits in this show in everyday life. Armani joked that the “curators must have worked very hard to find something in my past production to be in the exhibit.” Nonetheless, he “would’ve made twenty dresses to be in this exhibit, but they said, “˜Shut up, Armani!'” Though he found the costumes on display “quite spectacular,” Armani admitted to wondering, “Did these guys have the guys to show them in London and Paris?”, referring to “the brave designers.”

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Armani closed by thanking the “cartoonists from the 1930s and 1940s who conceived of these characters,” and making a reference to Flash Gordon (not a superhero, but close enough!). And as soon as he was done, the translator told us they “just found the speech.” He hadn’t needed it: he was wonderful.

Next up was curator Andrew Bolton, who revealed that “Philippe admitted in a moment of candor” to reading Captain Marvel as a child. Bolton then went on to explain that the letters of Captain Marvel’s magic word, “Shazam,” stood for the names of ancient gods and heroes; thus Bolton reinforced the point of connecting ancient mythology with the pop mythology of the superhero genre. Bolton also praised de Montebello for his “intellectual elasticity,” presumably meaning his openness to doing shows not just about unusual fashions but about comic book superheroes as well.

Bolton revealed that they had first “toyed” with the idea for this show five years ago, and that originally the idea was to focus on clothing that actually enhances one’s physical abilities. There are still some of these in the exhibit, including “wingsuits” from Atair Aerospace that enable the wearer to glide through the air. (Over at the Museum of Modern Art, in its recent “Design and the Elastic Mind” exhibition, I had seen an exoskeleton-like device that amplified the strength of the wearer’s arm, much like Iron Man’s armor!)

Bolton explained that both fashion and the superhero genre reflect the “zeitgeist” and “mirror'” themes that are “social, political, even sexual,” and that both fashion and superhero stories allow you “to act out your fantasies” and “to transform yourself.”

Bolton said that the show was “partly inspired” by Michael Chabon’s novel about the early days of comic books, The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay, and he thanked Chabon, who wrote an essay in the catalogue and was present at the press preview (although, alas, I never saw him there).

Bolton also thanked DC and Marvel for their cooperation with the show” and their patience over our somewhat idiosyncratic interpretation.” (You mean, like Catwoman as dominatrix?)

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Then Bolton introduced the final speaker, Nathan Crowley, the British production designer for the films Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, who designed the exhibition space for “Superheroes.” Crowley told us that he’d never designed a museum space before, and how he’d employed a trick from the movies, using mirrors to “elongate corridors.” I can attest that he did a great job: the first floor Special Exhibitions Gallery is usually a dark, even somewhat claustrophobic space, but “Superheroes” is brightly lighted, and the mirrored walls create a powerful illusion that the exhibit space is far bigger and more filled with people (who turn out to be reflections of ourselves) than it truly is. And can we credit Crowley for the idea of using the Alex Ross printed backgrounds?

With the press conference over, I returned to the “Superheroes” exhibition. Along a wall at the end of the exhibit was a row of vintage comic books, each relating to one of the characters featured in the show. There was Amazing Fantasy #15 (1963, the first appearance of Spider-Man), Amazing Spider-Man #252 (1984, the first appearance of Spider-Man in his black costume), Sensation #1 (1942, the first cover appearance of Wonder Woman, who had earlier debuted in All-Star Comics #8), Captain America Comics #1 (1941, the debut of Captain America, famously punching Hitler in the jaw on the cover), Incredible Hulk #1 (1972), Fantastic Four #51 (1966, “This Man, This Monster,” featuring the Thing), Batman #42 (1947, featuring the Catwoman in her Golden Age costume, which the exhibit never mentions), Detective Comics #33 (1939, an early Batman comic whose cover illustration makes his cape look particularly like bat wings), Tales of Suspense #39 (1963, the debut of Iron Man), Flash Comics #1 (1940), X-Men #1 (1963), Amazing Spider-Man #129 (the first appearance of the Punisher), and Marvel Spotlight #5 (the premiere appearance of the Ghost Rider).

Yet there was something missing. The museum’s labels for the covers on display specified the titles of the comics, their cover dates, and the name of the person or company that lent the copies of the comics. But what about the names of the artists? Like Jack Kirby, who drew the covers for Amazing Fantasy #15, FF #51, Incredible Hulk #1 and X-Men #1, and collaborated with Joe Simon on the cover of Captain America Comics #1?

For that matter, in the exhibition catalogue, distributed by Yale University Press, there are many, many reproductions of classic comic book covers, and once again, the titles of the comic books and their cover dates are specified, but not the artists’ names.

The book’s essays and the exhibition’s wall texts make a practice of listing the creators of each comic book character they mention. Some errors creep in. The Metropolitan follows DC’s official line that Bob Kane was the sole creator of Batman; once again, Batman’s first writer, Bill Finger, is the forgotten man. The wall text for Iron Man lists his creators as Stan Lee and Larry Lieber, neither of whom drew the character’s first story. (I salute the credits for the Iron Man movie for getting it right, listing Lee, Lieber, Don Heck, who drew the first story, and Jack Kirby, who designed Iron Man’s original armor.) In the case of the Flash, the exhibition and the book correctly name Gardner Fox and Harry Lampert as the creators of the original Flash back in 1940. But “Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy” is concerned not with the Golden Age Flash’s costume, but with the streamlined, modern uniform worn by the Silver Age Flash. The name of its designer, Carmine Infantino, is not to be found in the show or the catalogue.

Is it imaginable that the Metropolitan Museum would exhibit artwork in its galleries for drawings and prints on the second floor without naming the artist in the accompanying label, if that artist’s identity was known? How hard is it to identify the artists for classic DC and Marvel covers in the age of the Internet’s Grand Comics DataBase, or when there are acknowledged experts both within and outside the Big Two comics companies?

No, if the Metropolitan failed to name the comics artists responsible for those covers, then it must be that the museum did not feel that their identities are important. How different is this from the way that Roy Lichtenstein would base his pop art paintings on comics panels drawn by Kirby or by Russ Heath without crediting them? Or that Warhol at the start of the Metropolitan exhibition that is so clearly based on a Superman drawn by Curt Swan–but not credited as such?

Moreover, some of the artists who helped create the superhero costumes acclaimed in the exhibition are still with us: Joe Simon (Captain America)–95 years old but still active, Carmine Infantino (The Silver Age Flash), John Romita, Sr. (The Punisher), and Mike Ploog (Ghost Rider). Wouldn’t it be wonderful if these artists were invited to appear at the Metropolitan during the run of the exhibition, which does not close until September 1?

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With “Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy,” the Metropolitan has come a long, long way towards acknowledging comics as an artform. But the Metropolitan also still has a long way to go.

There was something else at the end of the exhibit, the biggest surprise of all for me. Near that wall of vintage comics is a little gift shop, which, among other things, sells Alex Ross superhero prints and books about superior comics. And I was flabbergasted to see among them my own Marvel Comics Travel Guide to New York City! Looking further, I found The Marvel Vault, which Roy Thomas and I wrote. As I watched, one of the attendees even bought a copy of the Travel Guide, which I quickly offered to autograph. (He said yes.) And on a subsequent visit to the Metropolitan, I discovered that both books were also prominently displayed on a table in the front if this Met’s main gift shop, as well! I had never anticipated this, but I was a part of the Met’s “Superheroes” show!

Following the press conference, most of the attendees quickly left, but I stayed nearly till the exhibit closed at 1 PM, and was even interviewed by a reporter for the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. (She said she had been told I was a comics historian, and I still don’t know by whom. Did any of my readers up in Canada see the CBC report on the exhibit? Did they use my interview?)

On my way out of the Museum I saw that the red carpet for that evening’s gala opening had been laid down along the Metropolitan’s celebrated front steps. I thought, why not? And I made my exit walking down the red carpet. My books were being sold at the Met, and I had just been interviewed by Canadian television; I felt like a bit of a celebrity myself.

THE MAN IN THE IRON MASK

My next stop was a nearby movie theater, where I saw a matinee screening of the new Iron Man movie. In the Beat’s annual survey last January, I wrote that one of the big comics-related stories to watch in 2008 was Marvel Studios’ first efforts at producing motion pictures in their own. There have been so many disappointing Marvel-based movies over the last decade–Ang Lee’s Hulk, Ghost Rider, Punisher, Daredevil, Elektra, the two Fantastic Four films; they may have made money, but they weren’t good. Marvel had input into these movies, but major Hollywood studios had been in charge. Could Marvel Studios, a newcomer attempting to become a new major, fare any better producing on its own? Iron Man demonstrates that the answer is yes. Iron Man has not only proved to be a commercial blockbuster, but it’s a superb translation of the comics series to the screen. To my mind, Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man trilogy is still at the very top, but director Jon Favreau’s Iron Man ranks right below them, above even the X-Men movie series. Maybe Marvel Studios’ main role was simply to give Favreau and his writers and cast creative freedom, but that has proved to be a wise decision.

From seeing the trailer for the Iron Man movie, I was concerned that Robert Downey, Jr., despite looking like Tony Stark, complete with mustache, would project too lightweight a persona for the character. I was expecting a more conventional leading man performance. But watching the movie, I was quickly won over, just like the soldiers accompanying Stark in the opening scene, who swiftly segue from seemingly regarding him as obnoxious to be charmed and delighted by him.

When Stan Lee and his collaborators introduced Tony Stark in 1963, he was a “millionaire playboy” in the mode of Bruce Wayne and other pulp and comics heroes.

It’s now well known that Lee was inspired by the young Howard Hughes in depicting Stark. Movie reviewers who find it unlikely that there could be someone like Stark who was a brilliant inventor, a multimillionaire, and a handsome ladies’ man should be reminded that the young Hughes was all of these things before he was swallowed up by madness. After the Fantastic Four movies caricatured the genius Reed Richards as a stereotypical geek, it’s refreshing that the Iron Man movie makes it clear that you can be smart and simultaneously be the complete opposite of a social misfit.

Moreover, the “playboy” persona fit the early 1960s, with the rise of Playboy magazine and its definition of cool. I suppose that makes Stan Lee’s Hitchcockian cameo in this movie particularly appropriate: a gag in which Stark mistakes him for Hugh Hefner. (But Stan is so entertaining at comics cons that I wish more filmmakers would let him talk in his cameos! He’s wonderful in his bit parts in the FF movies.)

In retrospect, Stan’s treatment of Stark as playboy seems rather naive. If Stark was trying to keep secret the fact that he wore a metal chestplate that kept his injured heart beating, how did he hide it from his lovers? Even if he never took off his clothes, which would seem downright strange, wouldn’t they feel the chestplate?

How do you make the “millionaire playboy” persona work in the 21st century? Isn’t it dated? Downey, Favreau and company found a way to make it work. In the early part of the movie Downey’s Tony Stark is self-centered, often irresponsible, and frequently exasperating. And yet he’s also witty, charming, ingratiating, and genuinely fond of his friends like James Rhodes. You can see how he annoys and irritates his friends and close colleagues, like Gwyneth Paltrow’s Pepper Potts, and yet it’s also perfectly clear why they continually forgive him and why he wins their loyalty and love. Downey’s Tony Stark has genuine charisma, and that is an essential part of the Stark character. Moreover, after he becomes Iron Man and develops a stronger sense of responsibility, he is credibly heroic and committed to his newfound ideals as well.

In the movie Stark starts out being irresponsible in many ways, from being inattentive to schedules to perhaps drinking too much (in an allusion to Stark’s becoming an alcoholic in the comics, quite possibly a storyline that will emerge in the movie’s sequel), to womanizing, to, most importantly, manufacturing weapons of mass destruction, even if they are intended for the U. S. government. The movie suggests that Stark’s brush with death, which leads to his becoming Iron Man, shakes him out of his immaturity, and makes him realize Stan’s famous lesson, that with great power- must come great responsibility. On returning to his factory after nearly dying in Afghanistan, Stark immediately announces that he is getting out of the munitions business. Indeed, in the movie Stark is fatally injured by his own weaponry, which has fallen into the hands of terrorists: his own bad karma has struck him down.

I didn’t think that in Stan Lee and Larry Lieber’s origin story for Iron Man back in Tales of Suspense #39 that they meant for Stark to be presented in a negative light. As noted, the playboy was considered the epitome of cool in the early 1960s. Moreover, Lee and company created Iron Man during the Cold War, only a year after the Cuban Missile Crisis (Lee’s 1960s Stark could also be regarded as Kennedyesque), and although the origin story is set in Vietnam, this was long before the antiwar movement if the 1960s became a major political force. Stan’s Iron Man stories of the 1960s take a militant Cold War viewpoint, with a parade of Communist villains, like the Titanium Man, and, of course, Wong Chu, the terrorist who captures Stark in the origin tale. I believe that Stan Lee thought that Stark was entirely admirable, both in devising weaponry for his country’s defense, and in traveling to Vietnam to witness his weaponry used in combat. In becoming Iron Man, a weapon himself, who could battle Communist super-menaces hand to hand, Stark was going to the next level.

But I don’t object to Favreau and Downey and company turning Iron Man’s origin story into a saga of personal redemption. That is very much in the Stan Lee tradition, and perhaps more specifically, in the tradition of the Stan Lee-Steve Ditko collaboration on Spider-Man and Doctor Strange. On becoming Spider-Man, Peter Parker starts turning into, well, an a-hole, using his amazing new abilities merely to seek fame and fortune, and allowing a fleeing criminal to escape because it’s none of his business. But it is indeed his business: that same Burglar murders Peter’s Uncle Ben, and Spider-Man must forever live with the guilt of knowing that he could have prevented Ben’s death but didn’t. Dr. Stephen Strange is an arrogant New York City surgeon, who is more interested in using his medical talents to make himself rich than genuinely concerned with the health of his patients. When an automobile accident injures his hands enough so that he can no longer perform operations, Strange loses everything, sinking into poverty. Only when he discovers a new purpose in life, selflessly battling evil as the student of the Ancient One, does Strange begin moving towards redemption.

I have no problem within Favreau and his collaborators turning Iron Man’s origin into a similar take of pride going before a fall, and that fall leading to moral rebirth. This is true to the overall themes of Stan Lee’s Marvel work, and it is an excellent way of making a hero whom Lee portrayed as a munitions maker and playboy acceptable to contemporary audiences.

Even in Stan’s and Larry Lieber’s original version of Iron Man’s origin, I perceive a theme that crops up repeatedly in Lee’s work. Tony Stark is a man who has everything, who seems to lead a perfect, charmed life, when it is abruptly taken away from him without warning: the multimillionaire genius is unexpectedly felled by a booby trap in Vietnam and left near the point of death. Similarly, Peter Parker did not expect that the Burglar would kill Uncle Ben, Reed Richards did not anticipate the radiation storm that struck his spaceship, Stephen Strange did not realize he would be in a car crash, and Bruce Banner did not predict that his assistant would try to kill him in the gamma bomb test. There is a disturbing side to Stan Lee’s classic origin stories: happiness and security and life itself are unstable and ephemeral, and can end at any time.

As a comics historian. I am impressed at how the Iron Man movie skillfully weaves together elements from throughout the character’s history. I do not expect movie adaptations to literally transfer every detail from the comics to the screen. It does not bother me that the site of Iron Man’s origin has been moved from Vietnam to Afghanistan: that is an intelligent updating. Moreover, given the shift in venue, I could not have hoped for a better, more powerfully effective dramatization of Stan Lee and Larry Lieber’s Iron Man origin story. The fact that in the movie the terrorists have gotten hold of Stark’s own technology makes it easier to believe that Stark could have created the original Iron Man battlesuit in primitive surroundings than it is in the original comics story.

The movie’s terrorist group is called the Ten Rings, an obvious allusion to Iron Man’s archenemy, the Mandarin. It was John Byrne, in reworking Iron Man’s origin, who first established that the Mandarin was the mastermind behind Wong Chu. Some have speculated that the bald terrorist leader in the movie will turn out to be the Mandarin in the sequel, although I would think that the filmmakers would try to cast a leading Asian star in the role. Stan Lee’s Mandarin is one of the great Marvel villains if the 1960s. But he is clearly inspired by Fu Manchu, and it will be interesting to see how Favreau and company can revamp the Mandarin to keep him from seeming to be a racist stereotype. (To Stan Lee’s credit, I never got the sense reading his stories that he meant the Mandarin to represent the Chinese in general.) with China as a rising economic power, perhaps it makes sense to portray the Mandarin as a Chinese counterpart to Tony Stark as high tech entrepreneur.

Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow even visibly has Pepper’s freckles in some close-ups) and Happy Hogan (played by Favreau) come from Stan Lee’s Iron Man stories from the 1960s. Stark’s decision to stop making munitions reflects Mike Friedrich’s Iron Man run in the 1970s. James Rhodes comes from the David Michelinie/Bob Layton collaboration that began in the late 1970s. Editor Mark Gruenwald challenged Denny O’Neil to come up with an Iron Man villain who would rival O’Neil’s great Batman villain Ra’s al Ghul: the result was Obadiah Stane. (So O’Neil has co-created the main villains for both the Iron Man movie and Batman Begins.) Initially, Jeff Bridges’s portrayal of Stane as a glad-handing corporate master of spin doesn’t seem anything like O’Neil’s sinister, enigmatic figure, but in the film’s final half hour, Bridges’s Stane projects evil worthy of O’Neil’s character. I like the fact that the movie turns Stane into the business partner of Tony’s late father. This makes Stane into a symbol of the dark side of Tony’s father, a morally ambiguous figure who went into the munitions business. Initially Tony reveres his father’s memory in the movie, but he must turn against his business.

As in O’Neil’s storyline, the movie Stane dons his own armored battlesuit, becoming the Iron Monger. The movie’s Iron Monger is enormous, like a monstrous version if Iron Man himself, representing the dark side of Tony, had he remained a munitions merchant and acceded to Stane’s policy of selling arms to any buyers, including terrorists. After seeing the movie I realized that this enormous Iron Monger also reminded me of Iron Man’s Cold War nemesis, the equally gigantic Titanium Man, and their epic combats in the 1960s.

And then there’s Samuel L. Jackson’s surprise cameo as Nick Fury after the movie’s closing credits. Marvel had already been depicting the Fury of the alternate continuity of its Ultimate line as a Jackson lookalike. With all that has been written lately about the Jewish-American heritage of early superhero comics creators, and Mark Evanier’s observation in Kirby: King of Comics that Jack Kirby regarded Nick Fury as an idealized version of himself, casting Jackson as Fury seems to be missing a big point. On the other hand, if I had to choose between David Hasselhoff, who played Fury in a TV movie, and Samuel L. Jackson, well, of course I’ll pick Jackson!

CARTOON CENTENNIALS

I wound up the day by attending one of the “Monday Nights with Oscar” monthly screenings that the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences holds at its theater at Lighthouse International on 59th Street in Manhattan. (Yes, this is the Academy that gives out the Oscars, and an enormous reproduction of an Oscar statuette looms in one corner of the theater.) This evening’s program was titled “Tex Avery, Michael Maltese: Putting Looney in the Toons: A Double Centennial Tribute.” Avery was the great animation director who pioneered the classic “Looney Tunes” style of comedy but who created his surreal, absurdist, even postmodern, and explosively funny animated masterpieces for MGM (see “Comics in Context” #100, 101 and 188). Animation writer Maltese worked on cartoons with Warners director Friz Freleng, and later in the early Hanna-Barbera TV cartoons, but reached his peak collaborating with director Chuck Jones in the 1940s and 1950s.

The Academy had already presented this program in Los Angeles, but for the New York screening it was hosted by animation historian and New York University Professor John Canemaker. (Apparently NYU students sign up for his classes!) In last years I’ve attended Canemaker’s lectures at the Museum of Modern Art, where he promotes one of his books and shows animation relating to it, including a program of Winsor McCay animation, Disney’s Peter Pan (1953), in which Walt Disney’s great animators known as the “Nine Old Men” all worked, and Disney’s Alice in Wonderland (1951), to illustrate Canemaker’s lecture on his book about the Disney conceptual artist Mary Blair. Canemaker always presents a well-spoken, informative lecture, and I keep meaning to mention them in my column; now I finally have. He’s also written a book about Tex Avery, hence his presence this evening.

But Canemaker also pointed out that 2008 was also the centennial year for Warners’ master voice artist Mel Blanc, and the program served as an admirable retrospective of his work as well.

I could quibble with the selection of cartoons. None of the Avery cartoons on the bill reached the manic energy and reality-warping heights of his Northwest Hounded Police (1946), King Size Canary (1947), or Bad Luck Blackie (1949). For dazzling dialogue and masterful gag construction, I would have picked one of the cartoons from Jones and Maltese’s Bugs Bunny-Daffy Duck-Elmer Fudd trilogy of Rabbit Fire (1951), Rabbit Seasoning (1952) and Duck! Rabbit! Duck! (1953).

But still, the selection we got was good enough, including Avery’s Porky’s Duck Hunt (1937), in which Blanc took over voicing Porky Pig and also played Daffy Duck in his debut cartoon.

The show also included Avery’s A Wild Hare (1940) in which the trickster rabbit from previous Warners cartoons finally became the Bugs Bunny we know, complete with a New York-accented voice provided by Blanc. It was wonderful to see this cartoon again and study how well constructed the gags were; even apart from Bugs’s debut, it demonstrated how far Avery had already come in defining and mastering animated cartoon comedy.

Avery’s sultry songstress Red and stoic Droopy turned up to good effect in Little Rural Riding Hood (1949) and the Western parody Drag-a-Long Droopy (1954).

Freleng’s You Ought to Be in Pictures (1940), combining animation with live action, was shown because Maltese turns up on screen vividly playing a nasty studio guard–with a voice dubbed by Blanc!

Sometimes I feel uneasy about Pepe le Pew cartoons, since they’re really about sexual harassment, but I like it when the female cat turns the tables on Pepe as she does at the end of Jones and Maltese’s For Scent-imental Reasons (1948) in this program, providing another showcase for Blanc, channeling and parodying Charles Boyer.

By showing both the Freleng-Maltese Back Alley Oproar (1948) and the incomparable Jones-Maltese What’s Opera, Doc? (1957), the program enabled us to compare examples of Maltese’s ability to turn not only opera but even death scenes to humorous effect, as well as demonstrated Mel Blanc’s talent at conveying comedy through song, whether as Bugs acting Brunnhilde or Sylvester imitating Spike Jones (see “Comics in Context” #101 and 102). Putting A Wild Hare and What’s Opera, Doc? on the same bill also makes clear that the latter is, in effect, Jones turning his mentor Avery’s cartoon into an opera!

The program came to a satisfying close with Avery and Maltese’s collaboration on The Legend of Rockabye Point (1955) for Walter Lantz’s studio (see “Comics in Context” #189).

And what a pleasure it is to see these classic cartoons on a big theatrical screen with a large, appreciative audience, as they were originally meant to be experienced!

So: in the morning, an exhibit honoring superhero comics at America’s leading art museum, in the afternoon a critically acclaimed commercial blockbuster if a superhero movie, and in the evening, the Motion Picture Academy honors giants of the Hollywood theatrical cartoon. It was a good day for cartoon art.

But then I got the bad news about my comics course at NYU, and I thought, perhaps the cultural status of comics still hasn’t changed as much as I’d like to believe. Yet later that same week, I was invited to be a keynote speaker at an academic conference on superheroes, to be held next year. (I’ll tell you more about it when they’re ready to make a public announcement.) And I was invited specifically on the basis of my work writing “Comics in Context.”

We’re not in the Bizarro World. No, the world is changing around us, faster than we could have imagined. Many of us who have long taken comics and cartoon art seriously have dreamed that someday the world would recognize the true value of our artforms. Our dreams are now becoming realities.

LINKS IN THE AMAZON CHAIN

The Metropolitan Museum’s illustrated catalogue Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy, written by curator Andrew Bolton, is available at Amazon. com here.

As for the books by John Canemaker I referred to, their titles are The Art and Flair of Mary Blair, Tex Avery: The MGM Years, 1942-1955, Walt Disney’s Nine Old Men and the Art of Animation, and Winsor McCay: His Life and Art.

And you can find The Marvel Vault, by Roy Thomas and myself, here, and my Marvel Comics Travel Guide to New York City here.

Copyright 2008 Peter Sanderson

Comics & Comics: I… Am… Iron Fan

Filed under: Comics and Comics — admin @ 4:33 am

COMics & Comics 31208- lOGO

Howdy Interwebbers. I’m Matt Cohen and I dig Iron Man again.

Growing up, comic books were a huge part of my life. From a very early age I can remember being obsessed with comics, particularly (let’s be honest”¦ exclusively) Marvel. And even that was a shortlist of books. Pretty much, my childhood consisted solely of Wolverine, Venom, Ghost Rider and Punisher. That was it. Spider-Man made fleeting appearances, as did Hulk, but for the most part I had stuck to those four characters. What can I say; I was a brooding little kid. So yes, I was emo before emo was emo. My comic book reading consisted of dark and dangerous characters, all anti-heroes, and all pretty much insane. That is what my comic world was made up of. Except that is, for one man.

Tony Stark.

I don’t know what it was about the character that first drew me in, but Iron Man was the only “Straight-forward” hero book I read, and I loved it. The suits, the baddies, the attitude; I was hooked the moment I discovered old Shell-Head. Iron Man was never popular with my group of friends, most of them sticking to X titles only (This was the early nineties, after all) and for the life of me I can’t remember what first got me reading Iron Man. I know that my mom of all people was a fan of the character when she was a kid, so that may have steered me a bit, or possibly she bought me unsolicited Iron books that I read without choosing.

Regardless, I was an Iron Man fan: And a big one. I remember doodling designs for new suits in my schoolbooks, meticulously bagging and boarding Iron Man comics. It was a big part of my childhood. And then, at about age 12, I stopped reading comic books. Full out. One day I put them down and didn’t pick them up again for about five years. I don’t know if it was me attempting to “grow up”, or if newer hobbies took precedent in my mind, but I had stopped reading and collecting comic books completely. The characters I once knew and loved pretty much fell off of my radar. Sure, I’d read the occasional book when it was around me, but I stopped going out of my way to follow the stories that I had once obsessed over so much. I was suddenly more interested in hanging out with friends and getting into typical teenage “trouble” then I was reading the ongoing adventures of caped superheroes (What had happened to me?).

Jump to a few years later, some mellowing out time, and a now seventeen year old me. I was in my senior year of High School on suburban Long Island. My “fan” tastes had shifted from all things comic and “geek” related to all things in the comedy genre. Long story short, I saw the Hellboy T-shirt in Dogma, went out and bought a Hellboy comic and things sort of just developed from there. Within about three months I was reading 30 plus titles a week, ranging from indies to Super books. I began revisiting childhood favorites that had long lapsed from my memory. And yet one thing had changed. In those years in between my comic reading, one of my favorite characters had strayed to the dark side. And not necessarily to the side of evil – rather to becoming someone I had zero interest in reading about. That man, friends and neighbors, was Tony Stark.

I don’t know what it was that had changed so much about the character to immediately make me dislike him upon my return to the comic fold, but I can guess at some reasons. The smugness that I loved so much when I was young seemed to be gone. This new Tony, and by association, Iron Man, was pretty boring and conventional. Apparently, when Tony battled his demons and shed his vices, he also shed all character traits that I once found endearing. His quirky “Playboy” behavior that once drew me to the book was now gone without a trace. In the fast paced world of X books and mature Crisis titles, Iron Man was now veering into Captain America territory, a once great character that unfortunately had become stale over the decades (or decade, in my case). And with as many books as I read its hard to avoid a characters as prominent as Tony, especially in the company wide events which I rarely ever miss. In recent years, the Tony I had once idolized had now very much become the “Enemy” in my eyes (Due in a large part to his role in the Super-Hero Registration act, seen in the series Civil War).

My newly found dislike of Tony bled into all parts of my comic reading behavior. I stopped buying all Iron Man titles full stop. I cringed whenever I would see the character in another title. Tony had gone from being one of my favorites to my absolute least favorite characters in comic books. And that upset me, having to betray my childhood memories, but I really did not like the character anymore. That is, until, some genius somewhere decided to make an Iron Man film. With that simple act, my interest in all things Iron Man was quickly reignited. It wasn’t a blind “faith” sort of situation either. The teaser trailer for the film was so great in my opinion, that it really made me do some heavy thinking about my history with the character. It reminded me “Hey, you used to really enjoy Iron Man, and look, an Iron Man movie that looks pretty damn good!” Something about that forty odd second trailer not only made me excited for the Iron Man film, but it lead me to do some thinking about what the character really meant to me. This was a few months before the film’s release, so I had some time to really take a look at where the character has come from and where he is now. And I realized something.

I still liked Iron Man.

Yes, the character had become somewhat of an “a-hole” in recent years, but should that cancel out all the years of entertainment he’d provided for me before? I started seeing Tony different in the comics I read each week, really trying to understand his motivations as opposed to instantly disliking him. I reread the Civil War series and the books leading up to it to try and take a fresh view on Tony actions and more so, reactions to the events that unfurled. I found myself empathizing with Tony, feeling genuine remorse and pity as to what he’s unfortunately been forced to become. I no longer had him on the top of the Enemy list in the M-U, rather I saw him as a misguided but well-intentioned man that had fallen from grace. Then the movie came out, and as I stated in a previous column, completely reignited my passion for all things Iron.

Robert Downey Jr. is the walking manifestation of silver age Tony Stark, and just seeing that brash, fun and funny powerhouse again brought an ear to ear smile to my face. It also made me realize that when a character in comic books changes over the years it is a positive, avoiding the curse of stagnation. And though I found Iron Man boring until recently, It wasn’t due to the writing – rather, it was, but not because the writing was boring. The character became too straight-laced and “goody goody” for my liking, and until recently I think THAT was the aspect of the books that I shied away from. I am glad to once again be excited for all things Tony Stark related. The film franchise promises to be a great one. In the comic universe, Tony is edging closer and closer to the man we all knew and loved not so long ago. I will definitely be picking up the next Iron Man series and will most likely enjoy it whole-heartedly. It is a great time to be an Iron Man fan, and I am happy to be back on Shell-Heads bandwagon.

Tis all for now kiddos, but check back next week for some DVD reviews including the hilarious TV Funhouse Complete Series. It’ll be fun. You know it will.

And, as always,”Keep em’ bagged and boarded”

Matt Cohen forgot to write something for his sign-off.

Win GRACE IS GONE on DVD!

Filed under: Contests — UncaScroogeMcD @ 2:26 am

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We’re giving away, in conjunction with Fox Home Entertainment, two (1) copies of GRACE IS GONE on DVD.

Contest ends at 11:59pm EST on Tuesday, May 27th.

CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Tuesday, May 27th.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

May 20, 2008

Masters Of Song Fu #1: Round 1 Challenge

Filed under: Masters Of Song Fu — Tags: , , , , , , — UncaScroogeMcD @ 11:38 pm

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CLICK HERE TO VOTE ON ROUND 1

We here at Quick Stop Entertainment are true lovers of music, in all its forms. We’re also quite keen on the spirit of competition, and of spurring creativity through said competition.

To that end, we’ve launched a brand new form of creative combat here at the Stop.

In this age of manufactured and painfully earnest talent contests, we’ve decided to instead shine a light on the quirky, quixotic underworld of musicians that don’t get nearly the attention they deserve.

Ah, but I did mention that there was a competition involved…

A few weeks back, we sent out the call for challengers. Hundreds of you heard the call and fought for a chance to be in the initial group. 20 were selected. Only 19 responded in time. Them’s the breaks.

Like a songwriting version of Iron Chef, these challengers will now be presented with a very specific songwriting challenge. They’ll be given one week to complete their songs – however they see fit, within the parameters set forth – after which time the entries will be uploaded to Quick Stop to be voted on by you, the readers.

After one week of intense campaigning and voting, we’ll eliminate the bottom 14 vote-getters – leaving 5 competitors to move on to… ROUND 2.

That’s when things get crazy… But we’ll save the surprise til then.

What do we call this competition?

MASTERS OF SONG FU

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To mix things up a bit, we also announced three (well, 4, if you’re being technical) very special Masters who you’ll be going up against in this inaugural edition of MASTERS OF SONG FU. Think of them as the iron chefs of Song Fu, and your ultimate challengers:

JONATHAN COULTON

songfu-01.jpgJonathan Coulton on Jonathan Coulton: “In 2005 I left my day job writing software to pursue music full time. To keep myself busy I released a new song on this website every week for a year in a project called Thing a Week. A few of those songs became big internet hits (my folky cover of Sir Mix-a-Lot’s “Baby Got Back”, a funny video called “Flickr”, a song called “Code Monkey”), and I am now fortunate enough to make my living as a musician.

I write about a lot of geeky stuff because I am a geek. Some of it’s funny, but a lot of it’s not so funny, and even more of it is somewhere in between. I’ve been compared to They Might Be Giants, Barenaked Ladies, Loudon Wainwright III, and other musicians you REALLY LOVE.

I give lots of music away because I believe it helps my cause, and I love it when people use my music to create other stuff – music videos, pictures, remixes, etc. At the moment I’m unsigned, and I’m proud to say I’ve created this whole thing mostly on my own (with plenty of help from an amazingly supportive bunch of fans). But it certainly is getting busy… I will probably sell out and go Hollywood any day now…”

Official Website: www.jonathancoulton.com

PAUL & STORM

songfu-02.jpg Paul and Storm are a comedy music duo, and they have been performing as a duo since 2004. Before that, they were one half of a cappella band Da Vinci’s Notebook for about 12 years. A Paul and Storm show is part music concert and part standup/improv comedy”“just enough of both to fit neatly in neither category. They like to engage the audience, and are known to award snack cakes and/or other prizes for good (and sometimes bad) behavior. Their show would be PERFECT as a cable special, and would make lots of money for whichever brave channel decides to air them first.

Official Website: www.paulandstorm.com

DOC HAMMER

songfu-03.jpg Doc Hammer was born in 1626 in Hamar, Norway, under the name Erik VonHamer. Being the son of a humble cobbler, not much was expected of the young man, other than to cobble and to not complain about all the cobbling. But Doc was destined for greater things. At 17, with nothing more than really well made shoes and a dream, he made his way to Antwerp to study oil painting under the great Rubens. Within a year, the two were at odds. Rubens spoke (infrequently) of Doc as “that creepy skinny kid,” and Doc spoke of Rubens’s work as “kinda unattractive if you really look at it.” By 1648, Doc had relocated to Leiden, where he found his master in Rembrandt. It was there, in his 23rd year, that Doc met “She Who Was To Deliver The Kiss Of Eternal Youth.” After a spicy courtship, “She Who Was To Deliver The Kiss Of Eternal Youth” and Doc were married. By 1650 Doc had grown weary of immortality and committed an unsuccessful suicide by burying his never-corpse in the basement of a Dutch cottage. In 1870, Doc again resurfaced. Using the name Vilhelm Hammershoi, Doc resumed his painting career with mild success. After thanking his bride for “the immortality thing” and nicely reminding her that he had “heard every one of her stories like a billion times,” “She Who Was To Deliver The Kiss Of Eternal Youth” and Doc split up in 1916. Again, Doc literally went underground until, now using the name Armond Hammer, he resurfaced and made a whole mess of money selling overpriced meds to the Russians. Sick of all the baking soda jokes, Doc faked his death. Biding his time till the MC Hammer thing had blown over, Doc again resurfaced as “Doc Hammer.” Today, Doc still paints in oils and writes, voices, and does other crap for The Venture Bros. (a show you can watch on cable TV).

Official Website: www.myspace.com/dochammer

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In a moment, you’ll discover the details of the first challenge. First, though, here is the list of challengers:

THE CHALLENGERS

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TEARDROP

songfucomp-01.jpgTeardrop consists of just two members, brothers Jono Renton and Pete Renton. Brought up on the sounds of Saturday morning television in the 90’s they seek to write music that is evocative of both the past and looking forward. Both members use different skills to create their unique sound, often associated with such acts as The Album Leaf, Boards Of Canada, Aphex Twin and other IDM artists. Jono provides the guitars, while Pete provides the synths and drums.

Official Website: www.myspace.com/teardropuk

THE MATT LEES BAND

songfucomp-02.jpgMatt Lees was born and raised in sheep-lovin’ Wales. At 12-years-old his family decided to move to everything lovin’ Canada and start a new life. Not an easy feat for any person, let alone a less-than-manly pre-teen. Eager to fit in with the Canuck teens he threw himself into the arts. He began an obsessive love affair with music. Writing and singing to express his emotions, he needed to learn an instrument to complete his sound. In the beginning he learned piano but, being lazy, he didn’t want to lug a piano everywhere. Guitar seemed like the easiest choice… plus, chicks dig guitar players. Ego in hand, he now fronts a self-titled band. The MLB fuses a pop-rock sound with a modern blues feel. Playing mainly in Ontario, Canada, Matt has also shared his music with audiences in Europe – even the French! Matt loves long walks on the beach, puppies, sharing his feelings and the smell of dew in the morning. He is currently ‘sticking it to the man’ in the real world while preparing to record and release his debut album (aka scrounging funds and searching for a cheaper studio).

Official Website: myspace.com/mattlees

PAUL FRUMPTON EXPERIENCE FEATURING LARRY

songfucomp-03.jpgBorn in the fall of 2006 in the center of the two-man acoustic comedy rock scene, Columbus, Ohio, the self proclaimed Turner and Hooch of Rock and Roll, The Paul Frumpton Experience Featuring Larry – known more colloquially as Jeff Stormer and Jeremy Hoover – are best described as what happens when comedy, music, caffeine, and improv collide in a chocolaty, peanut buttery explosion of good times. Stormer and Hoover met as students of Ohio State University and have been performing for scraps of food and hobo nickels ever since. Jeremy and Jeff’s major influences include Bacon, Booster Gold & Blue Beetle’s irreverent banter, David Bowie’s crotch in Labyrinth, and a deep-seated love of go karts. Finally, we feel obliged to mention all the things that are off limits to the comedy duo… This list includes NOTHING.

Official Website: myspace.com/thepaulfrumtonexperiencefeaturinglarry

LEX FRIEDMAN

songfucomp-04.jpgLex Friedman’s musical influences include artists like They Might Be Giants, Moxy Fruvous, “Weird Al” Yankovic, CAKE, Barenaked Ladies, Tom Lehrer, Ben Folds, and Michael Jackson. Lex has left a smattering of bizarre music videos on YouTube, which have been slowly overtaken by videos of his 18-month-old daughter Anya. He occasionally shares new songs on his blog. He currently appears both weekly and weakly as the host of the “Week in Douchebaggery” on Cracked.com. Lex, his aforementioned daughter Anya, his lovely wife Lauren, and his diabetic maltese Charlie all live together in New Jersey, and sincerely hope that you don’t hold that against them. He gives one of them two injections if insulin each day – guess which! Lex also wrote this sentence. To avoid appearing like a suck-up, Lex has neglected to mention other musical influences of his who may or may not be the Iron Chefs of this Song Fu competition. Let’s just say he happens to also love the musical stylings of a guy whose name rhymes with Shmonathan Shmoulton.

Official Website: www.thefriedmans.net/blog

IN THE AUDIENCE

songfucomp-05.jpgIn the Audience is the newest musical outlet for singer/guitarist Jordan Stowell. At age 18, Jordan has just released his debut EP online and in select independent record stores in the northeast United States. The music has been compared to popular acts like Goo Goo Dolls and Guster as well as smaller acts like Anathallo and The Format. The music of In the Audience would likely fall under the genre of “Indie Pop.” Although likely not making an appearance due to time constraints, the band also includes guitarist Steve Janick. The band mixes calming acoustic guitars and violins, with loud percussion and the occasional keyboard or hand clap. New to the music game, In the Audience is already preparing summer tour dates in select regions of the United States and Canada.

Official Website: www.myspace.com/intheaudience

SARCASM

songfucomp-06.jpgI picked up the guitar 20 some years ago and still don’t know one scale or the names of most of the chords. After a year of playing I formed a band called The Narrow Way. We wrote such classics as “Polka Hell” and “The Shades of Limbo”. After refining my chops, I then formed a band called Mechanized Death, which was named after that infamous car accident safety movie from the 70’s. We wrote such inspired classics as “Roadkill”, “Tunafish” and “I Don’t Care”. After Mechanized Death, I went solo and now have written hundreds of songs… I even sold one to a morning radio talk show (ahhh… the fame). Lately, I won song of the day at Garageband.com…So I guess my star is still rising.

Official Website: www.myspace.com/sarcasmtheband

THE FLYING DeLOREANS

songfucomp-07.jpgHello there! We’re John and Jane DeLorean, and together we are the FLYING DELOREANS. We used to be husband and wife, but after a brief creative hiatus we got a divorce and now are just brother and sister. We have many, many influences, but mainly just really enjoy playing music. Our main instruments are piano and ukulele and guitar and we’re basically the loveable underdog. Well, see ya.

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Official Website: myspace.com/theflyingdeloreans

BEN & PETE

songfucomp-08.jpgBen Rossow is seeking to inflict upon the world his unique brand of acoustic pop/punk/folk music. Hailing from Mora, Minnesota, this northern songsmith and his collaborator, Pete Morgan, have recorded and performed under the name “Ben & Pete.” Ben plays acoustic guitar and makes noise with his mouth, while Pete generally attracts songbirds with his delightful vocal stylings, and sometimes adds keyboard effects to distract potential enemies. Influences range from Bob Dylan to Weezer, Cheap Trick to The White Stripes.

Official Website: We don’t have one!

CLOAKIE

songfucomp-09.jpgMy Fu is stronger than you! I am Coleman Bear Saunders, or Cloakie to most. At the age of 25 I work with music everyday at my studio that I recently built. I produce, engineer and compose various genres of music with ninja like precision. I have been picking away at the guitar since the age of 7 after watching my Dad play Johnny Cash tunes in the wrong key while singing the wrong lyrics, although I do the same thing because that’s the way I was learnt, ya hear me boy? I live in Kentucky and the music scene isn’t the greatest, so I turn to the internet to pipeline my Fu to the masses for free. I’m getting tired of music these days, I want some more songs about Dragons and fucking! Songs that take you on a journey and let you experience a different world, like movies do. My dream is to compose and score music for video games, TV, and my ultimate goal, the big screen. This is why the Song Fu competition was made for me. All the challenges that the competition presents to me will be similar to the expectations of future employers. Good luck to all, and may the best Fu win.

Official Website: myspace.com/colemansaunders

ELAINE CHAO FINNELL

songfucomp-10.jpgElaine Chao Finnell is a singer/songwriter from the San Francisco Bay Area. In her checkered musical past, she has been a choral singer, a pit musician, an a cappella vocalist, a vocal percussionist, a hip hop beatboxer, contemporary Christian worship musician, and a musical librettist. After leaving the a cappella world in 2001, Elaine shifted into the world of hip hop theater, touring with spoken word artist Aya de León, then going solo and performing in such venues as the Yerba Buena Gardens in San Francisco and at the Apollo Theater in New York City. She began writing music at the tender age of 17, co-authoring her first musical with Brian Allan Hobbs. Since then, she has written two full length musicals and two plays. She currently plays regularly at her church as a lead vocalist and rhythm guitarist. While not in her musical pursuits, Elaine can be found in a cubicle at a major software company, at home with her engineer husband and their network of Macs, or studying martial arts at a local university.

Official Website: www.gotspit.com

AIRPLANE VS. AMBULANCE

songfucomp-11.jpgAirplane vs. Ambulance are a four-piece synth-punk band from Abbotsford, BC. The band’s sound has been described as a blend of pop hooks and indie sensibility, and the’ve crafted their own unique take on modern rock.

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Official Website: www.myspace.com/airplanevsambulance

EAST CAROLINA

songfucomp-12.jpgEast Carolina was formed in 2006 when friends Aaron (vocals, keyboards, accordion, etc) and Stuart (electric guitar, bass, keyboards, etc.) realized that, though often praised individually for their musical prowess, together they would be a virtually less-stoppable musical force. Combining in their music elements of alternative and classic rock, comedy, jazz, hilarious banter, polka, and more, East Carolina creates music that is unique, pleasurable, and often unclassifiable. Their original songs range in topic from Spanish love gone wrong to social anxiety to properties of gasses, and beyond. East Carolina is thrilled to be participating in the Masters of Song Fu competition and looks forward to sharing their songs with all of you.

Official Website: www.worldofarcana.com

TO SERVE MANKIND

songfucomp-13.jpgTo Serve Mankind seeks to do just that, via music that makes you think about the world and your place in it differently. Friends since high school, the duo, likened to They Might Be Giants or Barenaked Ladies, have played back yards to front yards and everywhere in between. It seemed like just yesterday To Serve Mankind had absolutely no future, and look at them now, competing in Song Fu against artists such as Paul and Storm and, uh, the Jonathan Coulton. Jeff Little and Bryan Ewing both grew up in Apple Valley, CA, an environment which demands creativity just to stay sane among Joshua trees, dirt, and the Wal*Mart. With a combined vocal range of at least a perfect 5th, To Serve Mankind is ready to take the world… aeriously. Bryan is into Rock, Jeff digs on Funk. Both serve as worship leaders at their respective churches and are married… not to each other… but to one woman each – Bryan to Michelle, Jeff to Jen. Bryan has a son named Malachi, and Jeff is expecting his wife to follow through on this pregnancy thing and produce a daughter, Jane. Jeff, Bryan (and Malachi) love Avatar: The Last Airbender.

Official Website: www.toservemankind.com

GERM

songfucomp-14.jpgHello. I am Jeremy Edgington. Call me germ. I live in Springfield, Ohio and I was born here in 1972. I started playing guitar at about 13. I took it seriously only off and on. I love to play. I hate to practice. I just jam. I got began enjoying “deeply listening” to music at a really young age. I was into Kiss when I was in Kindergarten and first grade. I had all of their albums. Second grade came along and out with Kiss, in with Def Lepard! Then came Van Halen and so on. I have a nice recording studio. Buckethead is a huge influence on me. I play bass and guitar. I do drum programming. I also program background ambience. I use the guitar for just ambient noises in songs, too. I will someday release a CD. Maybe…

Official Website: myspace.com/tikisamurai

RELIC’S JETBOAT

songfucomp-15.jpgRelic’s Jetboat are a modern folk band – this isn’t about acoustic guitars in the coffee shop, it’s songs about modern folk and the events or stories around us. They bring a party band attitude to their songs about Garage Sailin’, Gordon Downie, Ogopogo and The Beachcombers. The songs cross genres as they represent the music that we hear these days. From country to reggae, punk, celtic and rock, the band has been described as “The Barenaked Ladies with an edge”, or this review of the band: “These guys could get a job doing Muppet Music. From Canada, they perform their individual style with ease and an abundance of satire. They take us back to a time of musical innocence when people got off on groups like the Beach Boys.”

Official Website: www.relicsjetboat.com

JEFF MacDOUGALL

songfucomp-16.jpgThe Deal: After 20+ years making music as a hobby, I recently wrote and recorded a song for my daughter. I got a little taste of mild success (hey, my mom liked it). So now I’m taking my music out of the closet, dusting it off, and seeing how it does in the sunshine. Who knew there was so much work in just attempting to do music for a living. I feel like I am opening a Subway franchise (Only opening a Subway franchise seems more fulfilling in a creative way).

Official Website: jeffmacdougall.com

SHANNON MILLER

songfucomp-17.jpgShannon is a woman of keen intellect and she is a little cuter than average, but not photogenic, so her picture will not necessarily reflect her attractiveness. She likes to ride vintage bicycles that clunk and whistle so that people in the city know she’s approaching and take notice. When she’s not working her ass off at her corporate job that pays huge cash, she likes to belittle her husband (sorry, fellows, she’s married) and re-arrange her coaster collection. She wants to make it big in Song Fu so that she can finally have an excuse to quit her career and bask in the adoration of her fans. At this time, she only has two fans (three, if you include the kid in the street that sometimes rides by on his scooter and stops for a minute when he hears her playing the guitar in the back yard, or maybe he’s looking at her dog in the window; she’s not sure).

Official Website: We don’t have one

BROADBAND FIASCO

songfucomp-18.jpgI trained as a film critic at Glasgow University, then as an actor at the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama and then worked in a call centre for three years. Figures. Fed up with offering people death insurance, I taught myself how to edit film and got a job in a Glaswegian production company editing fishing programmes. When the allure of that finally wore off I went freelance for a while before setting up my own company, TheCage.TV Ltd. All through this time I’ve been writing songs to play live and record, in the olden days on MiniDisc and four-tracks and nowadays on Garageband. Currently I’m the only member of the band so it’s essentially solo work, though in theory anyone can contribute.

Official Website: myspace.com/broadbandfiasco

RUN AT THE DOG

songfucomp-19.jpgRun At The Dog are high energy, rock/pop, category-sluts with multi-gendered vocals and intricate arrangements. They are like Abba meets Faith No More meets Mos Def meets the Mormon Tabernacle Choir meets Steely Dan. The songs of this Minneapolis 5-piece are always written right away, with no respect for the calculating mind. Audience members are unsure whether to dance, laugh, or panic.

Official Website: myspace.com/runatthedog

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ROUND 1 CHALLENGE

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You must do a song in the style of a classic television show. Not only that, but this song is the theme for a fictional television show about yourself (or your band). By “classic television show” theme song, we mean the type of themes found in shows from the 1960’s – 1980’s (ie Gilligan’s Island, Cheers, The Fall Guy, Diff’rent Strokes, Welcome Back Kotter, Greatest American Hero, Happy Days, Laverne & Shirley, The Facts Of Life, Green Acres, Gimme A Break, The Monkees, etc.). Your theme song must include both lyrics and music. It must run no shorter than 30 seconds, and no longer than one (1) minute. Your theme song must be submitted in mp3 form (128-192kbps) either via e-mail (to songfu @ asitecalledfred.com – remember to remove the spaces) or a file upload service (like RapidShare or YouSendIt). Deadline for submission is 11:59pm EST on Tuesday, May 27th, 2008.

Voting on Round 1 submissions will commence on Wednesday, May 28th, 2008.

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If you triumph, not only will you win remarkable (and potentially off-putting) bragging rights and a clutch of fantastic mystery prizes, you will also become the proud owner of the magnificent, one-of-a-kind MASTER OF SONG FU TROPHY, designed and handcrafted by [adult swim] superstar Dana Snyder. Yes. Dana Snyder.

Good luck, and bring on the Fu.

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Opinion In A Haystack: Summer Movies, Bitter Fossils, and Self Reflection

Filed under: Opinion In A Haystack — admin @ 4:55 am

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As I sit here at my PC, stomach gurgling, churning, and no doubt brewing up some more lovely diarrhea. (Yes, I’m sick, and no that is not too much information.) I have a far more serious ailment then that which troubles my gut. The summer movie season is upon us, hovering over our backs and pounding our soon-to-be raw and torn consumer anuses, and honestly, I am at a loss. I find that with the passing of each mega-billion-dollar-budget film of every summer I sink just a bit farther down in my understanding of the importance, future, audience, and criticism of cinema. Am I, still having yet to have reached thirty years of age, a fossil? Does the bitter, brewed sentiment that flows out of my lips after sitting through ninety minutes of tepid CGI have any place in a world where films like Taxi Driver, True Romance, The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, The Thing, and Robocop are considered dated, slow, and forgotten by the majority? And in contradiction to those questions…are my views and opinions nothing more then a molecule in the fingernail of the giant that is the new-found, un-credentialed, shallow, “thumbs up, thumbs down,” and ultimately useless blogosphere of film criticism that has engulfed an important but lost journalistic art? I will admit that I am probably the only one, if not one of the few, who has had such rousing and troubling questions pop into his head DURING a screening of Speed Racer.

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In the past few weeks I have, much like the rest of the planet, seen both Iron Man and Speed Racer. Sitting through Iron Man a second time, after having read a large assortment of positive online reviews and those contained within magazines and newspapers caused me to boil over with anger. This contradicted logic for I agreed (for the most part) that the movie was “pretty good.” Nothing classic, (we don’t make classics anymore these days,) nor forgettable. I then proceeded to write the following…a meandering angered mess for which I wouldn’t insult any reader by putting in the actual “meat” of the column, but still deem worthy enough for others to read, if only to see if you empathize with my often irrational bout of embitterment. Please note how I refer to my metaphorical “gullet” being “sick,” only to be surprised a few days later with the medical equivalent I mentioned above. Here it is…

Jon Favreau’s Iron Man is finally here. The critical acclaim is soaring (94% on Rotten Tomatoes as I type), the profits are rising (no competition except clichéd slop), and the fan buzz is beaming with squeals of geek-gasmic fortitude. I’ve already viewed it twice and I don’t plan on reviewing it here. Why? It’s too expected, too simple, and just too damn painful. I don’t want to be counted among the mass of those fans and critics (including the reputable ones) alike whom I’ve read these past few days who seem to either be sixteen-years-old or mentally stunted and have forgotten that movies existed before CGI. Have you read these reviews? Yes…they are all positive and deservedly so, but the sickening in my blubbery gullet comes from the horrendous comparisons to other superhero movies.

Iron Man, with its edge-of-your-seat action and skilled male lead, most certainly gives the Spidey franchise a run for its money.”

“One of the best superhero movies EVER!!! Right up there with X2 and Batman Begins!”

“Not since the first classic Spiderman flick has a comic book movie been so amazing…80,000 STARS!!! INSTANT CLASSIC!!!”

“I would sell my own child to see it again! Better then Ghostrider!”

Those quotes were fabricated by me; still they fully represent what I have been reading. My beef isn’t with the opinions either. I thought the movie was, considering Favreau’s involvement, definitely “money.” The dilemma I face is, I’ll admit, probably more due to my bitter nature. However, excuse me, but did you just say that the greatest superhero movies ever were all somehow contained within the last 10 years? Hello? Hello? Anybody home? Huh? Think, McFly. Think!

It seems as though critics, even the elders, are somehow giving in to the youthful, pre-conceived notion that modern special effects are now ultimately integral to define quality within film, especially in comic book cinema. I am going to assume that we’re just throwing all movies before the dawn of the computer under the bus. Superman: The Movie, a timeless, American classic, gets completely pushed aside for the likes of Spiderman? Excuse me for thinking that comparisons of greatness shouldn’t be made toward a movie featuring a Macy Gray cameo and a torturous Julia Roberts underpants joke…but hey, at least it has whiz bang special effects handed down from the gods of the computer chip. See, that’s what makes it better!

Sarcasm. Anyway, I’m not saying that COMPUTER GENERATED IMAGES are bad, or that new superhero movies are bad. What I am saying is that perhaps we should really start to worry about the serious deficiency of scope in current criticism and the foundations on which we are “criticizing.” When the upper echelon (which believe me, I am NOT AT ALL counting myself a part of) of film critics start to “forget” the cinematic support beams of the past 80 years, something needs to wake us up again. 80 years…not 50…not 20…most certainly not 10…80 years and more of this art that we all collectively love and discuss and believe in. Yet, somehow, all Iron Man’s exquisitely formulaic and massively entertaining structure burrows up for comparison is recent CG laden, product placement shit fests of the last decade. This is what we are comparing greatness too now? This is how far we’ve fallen?

It’s almost as if “older” movies are dismissed, not out of hatred or malice, but out of a mental fog that is clogging us all up and making us forget that true quality is not about how good the FX look, or how much the action-to-dialogue ratio is, but how much love and admiration was poured into a film, and what the ravages of time and re-watch value will do to it. Iron Man is a good movie, and it would still be good if you took away half the budget. The characters were funny and real, Tony Stark was perfectly played, and the writing was sufficient for a well-balanced comic book sensibility. Sure, the suit was amazing, the action was kick-ass, and the lumbering fight with the Iron Monger was ok, but much like Richard Donner’s genre-defining Superman, Tim Burton’s beautifully unreal Batman, or Paul Verhoven’s masterpiece, Robocop, it’s the craftsmanship, social importance, satire, and the intentions behind the fourth wall that make it succeed as a film. Not the mind-blowing CGI.

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So, it turned into a review after all. I realize that my message of “special effects don’t make a film” is really old and overdone, but if things keep getting worse…why not keep saying it until it sticks? Plus, I have a feeling that the very “critics/fans” I am trying (however unsuccessfully) to address with this muddled message are the same people who will bitch and moan about how the action in the new Indy movie isn’t as “eye-popping” or on the edge as they figured it would be. They, of course, would be forgetting that Indy was never about Matrix-style craptastic action, and of course will not acknowledge that Spielberg INTENTIONALLY made the new film EXACTLY like the other three. I can hear all the complaining now. Ignorant, youthful cries of how Iron Man’s action put Indy’s to shame. Loud yelping spears of sound impaling my ear drums and repeating the unknowledgeable and ill-conceived notions that their .000001 Pico-second attention spans, when not being entertained by their cell phones, found Indy 4 to be underwhelming and not as “quality” as…say…pig snot like Transformers. I really hope Spielberg bludgeons you in the face with his talented directing dick you fucking unappreciative little….

Whoa! Gotta cool down.

I was pretty bitter, and admittedly, a little off base. After reading it again I realized that I had no point other then “HEY MOVIES AREN’T MOVIES ANY MORE, THEY ARE THINGS, JUST HOLLOW THINGS!” I planned to scrap it completely, in fact I wasn’t even clear about my intentions for writing it, and then, I of course saw Speed Racer.

Sinking to the level of reviewing Speed Racer is not something I mentally or physically feel up to right now. I will say that, with the exception of John Goodman fighting a ninja, I loathed everything about it. I’m not going to go into why, for this column it’s irrelevant. All Speed Racer did for me was become a catalyst for realizing that the beautiful, thought-provoking world of main-stream cinema (not talking about foreign or independent here) is NOW, more so then it ever has been, singing the last, muted notes of its swan song.

Film is, actual film, going to be slain by digital. Sets will be fully replaced by green screens. Socio-political and existential satire completely replaced by seizure inducing piles of computerized excrement that have only form and not function. Cinema being important is about to die. Nothing new I know, but it scares me. Yet all I read on message boards is that “Films are made to be enjoyed, not taken seriously for any reason…” Excuse me, but while I do believe in the entertainments, I also have a foot firmly planted on the belief that there are films that have changed the world, changed lives, and truly mean something to humanity. Reducing film to an “enjoyable” yet “exposable” form of expression is sad, and yet that statement is BEYOND rampant all over the realm of criticism and fan reaction. One would hope we don’t also say the same about music, literature, and journalism…which we probably do, sadly. However, I am not familiar with it.

Reading this far you probably realize that I am an old codger. However I am not against all things soon to come, if you notice I am plenty excited for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. There are two reasons for such: The first being that Dr. Jones is my favorite fictional character of all time (sometimes trading places with Doc Brown depending on my mood.) The second reason stemming from everything I’ve read Spielberg say about the movie. He’s using little to no CGI, he’s actually using real sets (in the face of advice from pal George Lucas), he instructed the cinematographer to make the film look as though it were made twenty years ago, and he even guaranteed no hyper-edited action sequences that have now become staples of the theater. Steven Spielberg, in a non-Indy related statement, admits he will still be shooting on real film stock long after all other director’s have abandoned it. Mainly because, and I couldn’t agree more, film has a living texture to it, something digital is sorely lacking in its lifeless universe of hallow pixels. Yes I am sucking his cock…you know why…because as an uber-Indiana Jones fan and an uber-film fan…Spielberg is sucking mine. Sure, he makes mistake, yet he seems to be the only mainstream filmmaker that is this adamantly outspoken about real film and it’s preservation. Hate him or love him, The Beard is romantically involved with the beautiful tradition of movies and that is why I retain his work, early to now, still has more merit then even some of the smaller guys that also romantically get down with movies. If you took away his huge budgets you wouldn’t take away his knack for putting something meaningful or just plain fucking great on the screen.

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Straying too far away from my main point is not something I want to do, however this “stream of consciousness” induced by Speed Racer‘s disgusting display of cinema’s death is a lot to chew. The warning needs to be put out. We are about to fall off the cliff. Last summer we stood at its edge, the summer prior we saw it on the horizon, now I’m afraid we are goofily balancing on the tip with our arms flailing and the updraft from the cliff face cooling our belly button. I am certainly not the first to ask, but whose fault is it? The moviemakers or the goers? The critics or the bloggers? Father Time or Satan? It is rhetorical, at least for me, because ultimately I don’t know. I just know it really, truly, more then ever, needs to be asked.

Toy Box: Have you got TopSpots?

Filed under: Toy Box — admin @ 4:47 am

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Today is not about toys, or busts, or statues, or games, or action figures…but rather a new widget that I think is so cool I wanted to bring it to your attention. If you’re a blogger or website owner, you just might think this is pretty damn cool too.

It’s called TopSpots. It has been developed by a company called ScratchBack, which is a name that makes a lot more sense than TopSpots once you find out what it is.

The simplest explanation is that it’s a fancy tip jar. For years, it’s been possible for readers of your content to give you a ‘donation’ through Paypal, but the term ‘donation’ is a bit of a misnomer, since it isn’t a tax deductible sort of thing. So instead, websites and bloggers started to refer to it as ‘tipping’, a way for a reader to throw a little cash your way for your great work.

Most tip jars are just a graphic that leads you into the usual donation page on Paypal. And while this works pretty well for many sites, the ScratchBack folks took it one step further. It’s still a tip jar, but now the tippers get something in return – a text link to whatever site or blog they’d like! When a tipper pays you the tip (an amount set by you), their requested link goes to the top of your TopSpots list, bumping each of the previous tippers down one.

Even if your readers don’t have a blog or website of their own to link to, there’s all kinds of possibilities. Perhaps a link to their favorite charity, local school, a retailer they’ve been happy with, or their favorite YouTube video – the possibilities are endless.

You can set up the widget to have several different number of TopSpots or links in the list on your page. You also have options such as allowing the links to show up immediately on your page when the tipper sends you the money, or having the option of reviewing and approving the link manually first. And you can set how the links get bumped down – is it immediately, or do the links remaing for some set period of time before the next link can push them down? That’s up to you as the blogger or website owner!

Isn’t this just a form of advertising? Well, yes and no. It’s technically not advertising because there is no guarantee on your part on how long the link will be on your site, or even if it will appear. The tipper should be sending you the money because they really do appreciate your work and the value your content provides. The link is merely something extra, something you’re giving the tipper to as a thank you. They have to tip you before you even can review the link they are sending, and you have the right to refuse to show any links you find offensive or inappropriate. You’re in complete control.

I’ve implemented this feature over at my own site, Michael’s Review of the Week. You can see the TopSpots list on the bottom left of the main page. I’ve gotten nothing but positive feedback so far from my readers, and there have been some really useful links for not just pop culture stuff, but some other areas that I thought were just damn cool.

All is not perfect yet, and I do hope that future development will allow for owners to have more control over the look and feel of the widget itself. Right now, you can choose from a dozen or so different looks, but these are all very similar, and your own style sheet may override theirs, requiring you to make some additional changes on your side. I’ve also found that you do have to spend some time explaining what it is to folks, because it hasn’t yet become widely recognized. Once it gets out a bit to more sites, I suspect that the number of folks tipping will also increase substantially.

If you’re a blogger or web site owner looking for a new way to involve your readers in supporting your work, I highly recommend checking this widget out. In my professional life, I see tons of new ideas come and go, and it’s rare that I see one like this that really pops out. And it further proves that there’s always a better mousetrap!

May 19, 2008

TV Or Not TV: 5/19 – 5/25

Filed under: TV Or Not TV — admin @ 4:54 am

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I’m not sure if I am supposed to be surprised or angry about this week. Last week’s episode of LOST was so good that I’m just chomping at the bit for more, but we don’t get that until next week. The season finale of Medium was filled with lots of twists and turns but still had a very happy ending. Heck, I even enjoyed Desperate Housewives. Still, after all this, I just feel half empty because of the truncated seasons we were handed due to the WGA strike (I know, I should just be happy we had more episodes).

Since I have been belly aching for the past few weeks about Reaper I suppose I should bring the entire thing full circle and mention that the show has in fact been renewed for another season. Another reason why I’m not sure if I should be happy or angry is because it has only been given a 13 episode pick up as a mid-season replacement next season.

There’s really not much else to say. Just about every show that is new this week is wrapping up their season this week as well. If you want real entertainment than be sure to check out this column next week when I’m struggling through the dregs of what is on to try to actually find something to write about. It should be a real hoot.

Now, let’s get to it.

MONDAY

FOX ““ 8:00 PM: It’s all Gormogon all the time on Bones! I am going to be bummed if they actually catch Gormogon this finale because I just love typing the name.

NBC ““ 8:00 PM: American Gladiators is back, and it is police officer vs. police officer.

CBS ““ 8:30 PM: On the season finale of How I Met Your Mother Ted gets hit by a car and ponders his life and his current relationship. Will we finally see who owned the yellow umbrella at the beginning of this season? Doubtful.

TUESDAY

FOX ““ 8:00 PM: It’s David vs. David tonight on American Idol. Is there really any point in watching or voting? Solid money on Cook for the win.

CW ““ 9:00 PM: Can it be true and Sam is the son of the devil? Last week on Reaper they wanted us to start thinking that. No matter what happens tonight sadly you will have to wait until 2009 for the follow-up.

HBO ““ 8:00 PM: Knocked Up is definitely the movie that catapulted Seth Rogen into the stratosphere, and gave a nice boost to Katherine Heigl as well.

WEDNESDAY

FOX ““ 8:00 PM: From the hype you would think that the only thing really on TV tonight is American Idol. All of the other networks really seem to have thrown in the towel and completely agreed with this perception.

MTV ““ 8:00 PM: If you want to hide from the hype why not take in four hours of The Real World: Hollywood? Chock full of interventions, stolen panties, and fun lovin’ conflict.

THURSDAY

ABC ““ 8:00 PM: Season finale night on ABC kicks off with the stunt casting of Lindsey Lohan on Ugly Betty. Words can’t even express how much I won’t be watching this tonight.

FOX ““ 8:00 PM: So You Think You Can Dance? Me either.

IFC ““ 8:00 PM: Take in 90 minutes of the R. Kelly saga Trapped in the Closet.

ABC ““ 9:00 PM: Two hour season finale for Grey’s Anatomy. Just typing about this and Ugly Betty caused a serious drop in my testosterone. Must find sports game, STAT!

FRIDAY

BBCA ““ 8:00 PM: One of my favorite “story telling” comedians is on tonight with two back-to-back specials: Eddie Izard: Dress to Kill and Eddie Izard: Glorious. Don’t tune in expecting to see the guy from The Riches.

HBO ““ 8:00 PM: Braveheart is such a good movie it almost makes you forget about the drunken, misogynistic, anti-Semitic side of Mel Gibson. Almost.

SATURDAY

HIST ““ 8:00 PM: The History Channel is once again trying to cash in on the Indiana Jones hype by re-running the Quest for the Lost Ark.

FOOD ““ 8:00 PM: It’s an Iron Chef America marathon tonight. See how Bobby Flay and Mario Batali became chefs of iron. Just be sure to eat a big meal before viewing.

SUNDAY

TBS ““ 8:00 PM: A freak accident gives womanizing Mel Gibson the ability to hear the thoughts of women in What Women Want. A guilty pleasure flick of mine, regardless of how absurd it is.

CMTV ““ 8:00 PM: Four words that just scream at you to tune in: My Big Redneck Wedding. Anything that shows a wedding with greased pig catching gets my attention.

Will Wilkins did, in fact, attend a redneck wedding once”¦ complete with the father-of-the bride dancing in a pig trough.

May 18, 2008

SModcast 50

Filed under: SModcast — Tags: , , , , , — UncaScroogeMcD @ 11:56 pm

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Your TextSModcast is the meandering palaver of a pair of dudes whose voices are so dull, they don’t deserve to be on the radio (and, hence, aren’t). Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier are SModcast.

The best thing about SModcast? It don’t cost nothing.

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SModcast 50: Gnome Alone –

In which our heroes relate ribald tales of corporate piracy, draw upon the scat games of the short and fantastical, discuss the first generation of hand-held games, and reminisce about the imaginary lengths a boy will go to in an effort to secure some free comic books.

[CONTENT WARNING] SModcast features harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Listener discretion is advised.

DOWNLOAD: (right click to save)
SModcast 50 (MP3 format) – 52.10 MB

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Wanna add your two cents? Spend it here, in the SModcast mailbag.

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Win a PREMIUM FORMAT INDIANA JONES from SIDESHOW COLLECTIBLES!

Filed under: Contests — Tags: , , , , , — UncaScroogeMcD @ 11:32 pm

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We’re giving away, in conjunction with Sideshow Collectibles, one (1) regular edition PREMIUM FORMAT INDIANA JONES. Not only that, we’re also giving away five (5) SIDESHOW COLLECTIBLES INDIANA JONES T-SHIRTS to the runners-up.

Contest ends at 11:59pm EST on Friday, May 30th.

PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS ITEM WILL NOT BE SHIPPED UNTIL 3rd QUARTER 2008.



CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Friday, May 30th.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

May 17, 2008

Game On! 5-16-08: Confessions Of An Achievement Whore

Filed under: Game On! — admin @ 4:28 am

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Geez, what the hell happened to playing games for fun anymore?

I mean, seriously. There was a time when i would play a game simply for the enjoyment of playing that game. I loved to do reviews, because i would pick apart the subtle nuances of each and every title in my catalog and only the most worthy would survive. Nowadays, this is simply not the case.

Now, I play games to pad my “gamerscore”. Yes, primarily I DO play them to review them (when I do get the chance) but now, rather than trying to see a game for it’s merits, i see it only as 1000 more points under my gamertag.

And honestly, why the fuck does THAT matter…to anyone? Those points are meaningless, and yet, some strive for full completion of a game (or at least full allotment of points for a game) simply to add the number to their score, a notch in the belt of geeks everywhere, full bragging rights and all that.

But that’s all they are; bragging rights. They don’t bring you money, fame or fortune, they just say “look at me, I have less of a life than you, I was able to get all 1000 points in GUITAR HERO III and all I have to show for it is arthritis and some bloodshot eyes”. They offer no other recourse other than comparison with one’s frends, and more often than not, ridicule.

Occasionally (read: ONCE) Xbox has held a competition to see how fast you can advance your score in a set period of time, and issue rewards for such “achievements”. This is a brilliant idea. This should be implemented on a more frequent basis. Like every month. For example, every time you get…say…8,000 Gamerscore, you should get, like, 500 Microsoft points or something. Give us an actual initiative to fulfil the requirements of beating a game to it’s fullest.

This way, we would feel a bit more satisfied for slogging through dreck like VIKING: BATTLE FOR ASGARD. Sure, beating the game is a great way to advance your score by about 600 pts, but you’ll feel dirty inside. You hack, slash, and slice your way through endless hordes of demons to save your brethren, only to do it all again in the next town. And while the graphics are decent, the gameplay is slow, and there’s little reward or replay value. There’s boobs, there’s fire, there eviscerations galore…but lasting fun? Not so much. It’s not horrible, mind, it’s just so damn repetitive.

The same can be said for DARK SECTOR. It’s a gorgeous game, but a little on the “lather, rinse, repeat” side of things. The glaive blade spices things up, but if it weren’t for the GEARS OF WAR style cover system or the RESIDENT EVIL 4 over the shoulder targeting, it’d be just any other dimly lit brooding third person shooter. The story is decent enough here, but they don’t give you ENOUGH of it to stay invested in the characters, so once again you find yourself pushing forward to the end of “just one more mission” (whose corridors look the same as the LAST mission, by the way) just so you can hear that satisfying “badoop” and get your 20 more pts for beating a level.

I even fall victim to it in sports titles. Hell, i don’t even LIKE sports titles, but occasionally, i find myself playing them, just for fun. As long as they’re of the more arcade nature, i actually get some enjoyment out of them. Or at least I used to. Take, for example, NBA BALLERS: CHOSEN ONE. here’s a series i really enjoyed in the last generation of systems. Arcade gameplay, goofy powershots and just the right dose of fun. Now, however,, all of that is stripped away in favor of flashy”game breaker” combos and moves with animations you can’t skip. The stat system is supposed to adjust your skills according to how you play, which is a great idea if i t actually DID that. I spent one match throwing nothing but three point shots, and at the end, i got higher stat improvements in things i didn’t do at all such as REBOUNDS and STEALS. Meanwhile, my three point skill went up by ONE. And yet, i keep playing the game, knowing it’s not as good as the last, just so I can break 30K.

I find it’s influencing the other game’s I play too. In the handheld FINAL FANTASY VII: CRISIS CORE (PSP) and FINAL FANTASY CRYSTAL CHRONICLES: RINGS OF FATE (DS) i see myself judging the games, wishing I could get achievements when I’m fighting through the parts I don’t like (which for CRYSTAL CHRONICLES was all of it…the multiplayer especially is lag-tastic) just to make playing more worth it. Admittedly, though, CRISIS CORE is VERY worth the play through if you’re a big FFVII fan: it begins the story very well and brings all the right elements to the front of the epic we already know. Unfortunately, the battle system is a little imperfect. You’ll find yourself wailing on the X button all day, just hoping for another cut-scene. And you forget to cycle BACK to your attack move after highlighting a health icon for a quick save, you’ll end up eating 3 potions before you realize you’re not even striking that giant dog in front of you.

Still, that’s not as bad as on the consoles connected to my TV. I get OKAMI for the Wii and all i can think is “gee, I wish I playing this again added to my score” rather than thinking “gee, they sure cut a lot out of the Wii version”. As it stands, the controls aren’t as fluid on the Wii version, which is bizarre, considering you’d think the Wii-mote would be a perfect fit for such a title. Also sad is the fact that most for the character introductions in all their wordy Japanese translations have been severely cut-down for the Western audience, which if you’ve played the PS2 version, you’ll know they were initially intact over here. Still, at least the game is worth playing if you missed it the first time, and as long as you can deal with the controls thinking you’re painting rather than attacking every so often.

I knew I was in trouble, however, when playing MARIO KART WII with my girlfriend. We were having fun racing down familiar tracks from past entries in the series, the Wii Wheel was actually responsive and fun to use, and boosting during drifts was easier than ever (though the old snaking method is still there for BIGGER boosts for the hardcore fans). Yet somehow, my girl managed to make all the good points vanish when, as i asked her if she’d lie to unlock the new courses in single payer, she remarked “nah, i don’t get any gamerscore for them”.

I’ve created a monster.

Ah well. It’s not all bad. Some games are worth playing even beyond the gamerscore. CONDEMNED 2: BLOODSHOT scared the shit out of me so much I didn’t even think of how many pints i was earning, just how many pants i was ruining. The environments and story elements were top-notch and helped clear up the rather ambiguous and confusing ending of the first game, and the battle system was even better than before. The multiplayer was also a welcome addition, and served to while away some time in a crazy first person FIGHT CLUB WITH BUMS kind of way.

Plus, there’s GTAIV to keep me busy. I’d write about it now, but I’d like to actually finish the game before making my final verdict on it, and the game is just SO encompassing that doing so in a timely fashion while also working a full time job takes more effort than I have. Plus, I’m trying to get that “Liberty City Minute” achievement for beating the game’s story mode in under 30 hours.

 

VIKING: BATTLE FOR ASGARD

One Gamer’s Opinion:
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DARK SECTOR

One Gamer’s Opinion:
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NBA BALLERS: CHOSEN ONE

One Gamer’s Opinion:
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FFVII: CRISIS CORE

One Gamer’s Opinion:
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FFCC:RoF

One Gamer’s Opinion:
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OKAMI

One Gamer’s Opinion:
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MARIO KART WII

One Gamer’s Opinion:
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CONDEMNED2: BLOODSHOT

One Gamer’s Opinion:
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THE GAME ON! RATING SYSTEM

 

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Ratings From Greatest to Least:

Kick Ass, Right On, Okay, Eh, and Stinker (aka CRAPTACULAR)

Cabin Fever #24: Brand Spanking New

Filed under: Cabin Fever — Tags: , , , , , , — UncaScroogeMcD @ 4:11 am

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cabin.jpgOh no! Just when you thought it was safe to hang out at the Quick Stop…

Cabin Fever (hosted by the twisted souls Brian Fitzpatrick and Aaron Poole) is the result of having too much time on your hands and access to your local community radio station.

Over the course of an hour, they manage to trawl the depths of good taste, plus throw some music in. How much more could you want from a podcast?… Quality? Oh… we didn’t think of that.

Enjoy! And we hope our cross Atlantic friends can understand the Irish accent 😉

Hugs and Kisses,
Aaron P. + Rev. Fitzy

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CABIN FEVER #24: Brand Spanking New – Aaron and Brian finally get back on track. With their shiny new equipment arriving, they start recording a brand spanking new episode, their first in nearly a month. Australians, mummies, dragon cartoons, the Champions League Final, the awesomesauce(TM) that is Father Ted and other assorted unimportant subjects get the usual treatment, as well as other crap that is unfit for community radio. It feels good to be back!

[CONTENT WARNING]: Explicit contents! We say every naughty word you can think of. You have been warned!

DOWNLOAD: (right click to save)
Episode #24 (MP3 format)

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May 16, 2008

Scrubs Blog: My Fairy Tale Prince

Filed under: Scrubs Blog — UncaScroogeMcD @ 6:11 am

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VIDEO BLOG #103: “My Fairy Tale Prince” ““
This week, we continue our look at the filming of the 7th season finale, focusing on Prince Charming himself, Keith.

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[flashvideo filename=”videos/scrubs/103_my_fairy_tale_prince_stream.flv” width=”480″ height=”360″ image=videos/scrubs/scrubs-103.jpg /]

Want to embed it in your blog? Use the code below…

Download Scrubs Video Blog #103:

Large (560 x 420 – QuickTime – 82.90 MB)
Small (320 x 240 – QuickTime – 36.10 MB)

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Ken P. D. Snyde-Cast #43: Bombasticalifragilisticexpialidocious

Filed under: Ken P.D. Snydecast — Tags: , , , , , — UncaScroogeMcD @ 4:22 am

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Adult Swim’s Dana Snyder and FRED’s Ken Plume set out to have a literate conversation between two pals, but inevitably devolve into a verbal, and funny, free-for-all full of bickering, infighting, and the special kind of male bonding that comes from conflict expressed through the podcast medium.

Actor/comedian/raconteur Dana Snyder, you’re certainly aware, is Aqua Teen Hunger Force’s Master Shake, Squidbillies‘ Granny, Minoriteam’s Dr. Wang, and The Venture Bros.‘ Alchemist. Available for weddings and bar mitzvahs (bat availability pending), you can keep tabs on him via his website, www.eyeofthesnyder.com.

Ken Plume is the editor-in-chief here at FRED. He is a friend of Dana’s, as well as his arch-nemesis.

VISIT THE SNYDECAST EXPERIENCE

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KEN P.D. SNYDECAST #43: Bombasticalifragilisticexpialidocious – Ken & Dana return for another decidedly odd episode, full of musical theater, beavers, Eddie Deezan, desperate pleas for work, Nick, Bowie and Bing, challenging Slash at the Viper Room, losing fingers, bulk shopping, mayo, taking a look into the listener mailbag, and heaping high praise upon the newly created Snydewich. Check out a pic and the recipe below…
[CONTENT WARNING]: This podcast may contain some foul language and horribly off-color jokes. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

DOWNLOAD: (right click to save)
Episode #43 (MP3 format)

[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/snydecast/ken_p_d_snyde_cast-43.mp3]

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THE KEN P.D. SNYDEWICH
by Official Snydecast Chef Joel Roush

This sandwich is served hot, as I think we can all agree it must be. The two colors of meat, Genoa salami and roast beef, represent the two personalities of the Snydecast. I’ll leave it to you to decide who gets to be which meat.

The Plume sauce (the pink one) is a garlic mayonnaise flavored with grenadine and vanilla. Since Dana hates mayonnaise, I created a thick, flavorful vinaigrette made with roasted Vidalia onions, roasted garlic, and orange blossom honey that I’m calling Danagrette. The lettuce, tomatoes, and pickle spear are served on the side along with a ramekin of Plume sauce and a ramekin of Danagrette.

Served next to the ramekin of Danagrette are the Ken P.D. Snydechips, representing the action and rock & roll. I’ve created a spice mixture especially for these chips called Snydespice, which has a hot/sweet flavor. Add a glass of cold Bud Light (for Dana ““ or the adults) or a glass of cold Cherry-Vanilla Dr. Pepper (for Ken ““ or the kids) and serve.

Bon Appétit,

Joel (recipes follow)

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Ken P.D. Snydewich

2 slices Caraway rye bread or other flavorful, hearty bread; both slices buttered on one side

6 oz. Roast beef; shaved

3 oz. Genoa salami; shaved

2 Havarti cheese slices; thinly sliced

2 Lettuce leaves ““ placed on the side

2 Tomato slices ““ placed on the side

1 Dill pickle spear ““ placed on the side

2 oz. Plume sauce ““ in a ramekin placed on the side (recipe follows)

2 oz. Danagrette ““ in a ramekin placed on the side (recipe follows)

Generous serving of Ken P.D. Snydechips (recipe follows)

Heat a small skillet over medium heat. Place the roast beef and salami into a small dish and heat in the microwave for one minute. Assemble the sandwich in the heated skilled like so:

Bread (butter side down)
Havarti cheese
Hot beef
Hot salami
Havarti cheese
Bread (butter side up)

Check the first side of the sandwich after a few minutes. When it is toasted to your liking, carefully flip it over to the next side and toast it like the first side. When it’s done, transfer the sandwich to a cutting board, cut it in half and put in on your plate. The Plume sauce and Danagrette is presented on the side along with the lettuce, tomato, pickle, and Snydechips.

Plume sauce

½ c. Mayonnaise

2 tbs. Grenadine

½ tsp. Vanilla

1 tbs. Garlic powder

Pinch Kosher salt

Pinch Black pepper, freshly ground

Add all ingredients to a bowl and whisk together until mixture has a uniform pink color.

Danagrette

¼ c. Red wine vinegar

1 c. Extra-virgin olive oil

1 tbs. Dijon mustard

1 Garlic head, roasted

½ Vidalia onion, roasted

2 tbs. Orange blossom honey

Pinch Kosher salt

Pinch Black pepper, freshly ground

Add everything but the oil to a food processor. With the motor running, slowly drizzle the olive oil into the other ingredients until completely combined and the solids are significantly chopped.

Ken P.D. Snydechips

For the chips:

Peanut oil for frying

2 Yukon Gold potatoes, sliced paper-thin

For the Snydespice:

3 tbs. Kosher salt

1 tbs. Black pepper

1 tbs. Paprika

1 tbs. Sugar

2 tsp. Cayenne pepper

2 tsp. Garlic powder

1 tsp. Onion powder

Heat the oil to 325°F in a large, heavy pot. Carefully add the potato slices to the hot oil to prevent them from sticking together. Fry until golden-brown, approximately 2 minutes. Remove the chips from the oil and place on a paper towel-lined plate. Immediately dust the hot chips with the Snydespice.

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Weekend Shopping Guide 5/16/08: Spaced Out Panda Fu

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The weekend’s here. You’ve just been paid, and it’s burning a hole in your pocket. What’s a pop culture geek to do? In hopes of steering you in the right direction to blow some of that hard-earned cash, it’s time for the Quick Stop Weekend Shopping Guide – your spotlight on the things you didn’t even know you wanted…

First and foremost, take a moment to celebrate the glorious demise of the ill-conceived American version of Spaced with the news that this July brings the release with the original Britcom that put Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, Jessica Hynes, and Edgar Wright on the geek map. Loaded with bonus features from not only the UK release, but also exclusive to the US edition, this is a must-have set. Keep an eye out at your favorite online retailer or DVD emporium.

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By the third season of Saturday Night Live (Universal, Not Rated, DVD-$69.98 SRP), all of the classic cast was in place and running on all cylinders. The writers and performers knew exactly what the show was capable of doing, and the audience was right there with them. The clunker sketches were just as much a part of the “golden age” as they are today, but the successes have become institutions. Bonus materials this go round include the short film “Things We Did Last Summer” and a wardrobe test with John Belushi and Howard Shore.

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For years now, I’ve been reiterating that you should buy, post-haste, the comedic sci-fi novels of Simpsons writer John Swartzwelder. Every one so far has been a gem, and he’s managed to keep the plate spinning with his latest tale of slow-witted detective Frank Burly, Dead Men Scare Me Stupid (Kennydale Books, $15.95). If you still miss Douglas Adams, get this book. And the rest of them. Get them now, in fact. I’ll wait here for you… And then, together, we’ll eagerly await the next installment.

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With a new Indy flick in the offing, it was a foregone conclusion that we’d see some form of re-release on the original trilogy – and so we have with the Indiana Jones Adventure Collection (Paramount, Rated PG, $59.98 SRP). All three films sport the exact same prints prepared for the special editions a few years back. What’s unfortunate, though, is that despite a clutch of brand new featurettes and introductions, they somehow decided to remove the bonus fourth disc from the original set, which contained the in-depth documentaries and vintage featurettes. What the hell? I guess we’ll be seeing the proper special edition set at Christmastime, along with Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull.

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Cinema geeks rejoice! Universal has seen fit to collect 10 of their catalogue’s most genre-tastic titles into one box set – The Classic Sci-Fi Ultimate Collection: Volumes 1 & 2 (Universal, Not Rated, DVD-$59.98 SRP). The flicks features in the set are Tarantula, The Mole People, The Incredible Shrinking Man, The Monolith Monsters, Monster On The Campus, Dr. Cyclops, Cult Of The Cobra, The Land Unknown, The Deadly Mantis, and The Leech Woman.

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As much as I liked the “official” history found in the deluxe tome To Infinity And Beyond, it’s nice to have a complementary, unauthorized book about the early days and rise of Pixar to balance out the picture, and David Price’s The Pixar Touch (Knopf, $27.95 SRP) fills that desire perfectly.

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The movie’s not yet in theaters, but everything I’ve seen of Kung Fu Panda has made me keen to do so. It’s taken awhile for rival studios that the way to fight Pixar is not to make knock-off Pixar flicks, but to realize the same thing that Warners did in their heyday – leave the heart to Disney and focus on the comedy instead. If you want to whet your appetite for this flick, look no further than The Art Of Kung Fu Panda (Insight Editions, $45.00 SRP), a lavish behind-the-scenes look packed with artwork and interviews, and featuring a preface from star Jack Black. My only regret, after seeing all of the beautiful, stylish 2-D design work, is that this is a CG film rather tan traditional animation.

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I wasn’t alive to experience firsthand growing up in the 50’s, but I’m certainly aware of the shows and celebrities that made up the pop culture diet of that generation. If you’re as interested as I am in that period, you’ve got to get yourself a copy of Hiya, Kids!! A 50’s Saturday Morning (Shout! Factory, Not Rated, DVD-$34.99 SRP). The 4-disc set is packed to the brim with episodes from the shows that shaped early kiddie TV – Howdy Doody, Kukla, Fran And Ollie, Lassie, The Paul Winchell Show, Winky Dink And You (one of my mother’s favorites), Juvenile Jury, Time For Beany, Sky King, The Pinky Lee Show, Flash Gordon, and more. Get this.

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It’s been 10 years since the passing of the Chairman of the Board, and Warners has seen fit to celebrate his passing with a quartet of box sets celebrating Frank Sinatra’s cinematic legacy – The Early Years, The Golden Years, The Frank Sinatra & Gene Kelly Collection, and The Rat Pack Ultimate Collector’s Edition (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$39.98 SRP each). Frank Sinatra: The Early Years features Double Dynamite, Higher and Higher, Step Lively, It Happened in Brooklyn, and The Kissing Bandit. Frank Sinatra: The Golden Years features The Man with the Golden Arm, None But The Brave, Some Came Running, The Tender Trap, and Marriage on the Rocks. The Frank Sinatra & Gene Kelly Collection features On the Town, Take Me Out To The Ballgame and Anchors Aweigh. Finally, The Rat Pack Ultimate Collector’s Edition sports Robin and the Seven Hoods, Ocean’s Eleven, 4 For Texas, and Sergeants 3. All of the sets contain a boat load of special features, including featurettes, trailers, documentaries, and more.

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Everyone’s favorite sleuthing antiquities dealer returns in the complete third season of Lovejoy (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$69.98 SRP), starring Ian McShane as the titular gumshoe. The 4-disc set features all 13 episodes, plus the third part of McShane’s retrospective interview, as well as Alan Titchmarsh interviewing McShane.

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It’s not like I would have paid to see it in the theater, but Mad Money (Anchor Bay, Rated PG-13, DVD-$29.97 SRP) is an amiable little heist flick, about a trio of women (Diane Keaton, Katie Holmes, and Queen Latifah) who decide to steal a boat load of money earmarked for disposal at the Federal Reserve. Would you believe that things get complicated? Bonus features include an audio commentary, a behind-the-scenes featurette, and the theatrical trailer.

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The fourth season of Mission: Impossible (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$49.98 SRP) finds Leonard Nimoy joining the show as master magician Paris, joining Jim Phelps (Peter Graves), Barney Collier (Greg Morris), and Willy Armitage (Peter Lupus) on fantastical missions full of hi-tech gadgetry. The 7-disc set features all 26 episodes, but still no bonus materials.

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Just when my nephews have nearly burned out the previous release, along comes The Backyardigans: High Flying Adventures! (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$16.99 SRP) to appease their insatiable appetite. The disc features a quartet of episodes, plus a pair of music videos.

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One of my nephews is fast approaching the one-year mark, and getting him to sleep is quite a feat with all that teething going on. We’ve found that a big help in the seemingly never-ending battle is Nickelodeon’s Sleepytime Stories (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$16.99 SRP). As the title suggests, it’s a collection of cartoons geared towards getting your little one to sleep. Also available is a companion CD, Sleepytime Lullabies (Nick Records, $ SRP).

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The off-color puppets are back with The Passion Of Greg The Bunny: Best Of The Film Parodies Volume 2 (Shout! Factory, Not Rated, DVD-$19.99 SRP) – jam-packed with a slew of new star-studded interplay and cinema take-offs. Bonus materials include deleted scenes & outtakes, behind-the-scenes featurettes, the reunion special, audio commentary, a gag reel, webisodes, and more.

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Have you ever picked up a book and thought “This is an idea that was a long-time coming…”? I thought that very thing when I thumbed through Band ID: The Ultimate Book Of Band Logos (Chronicle Books, $40.00 SRP). Within its sturdy cover, there lurks 1,000 of the most iconic band logo designs ever to grace drum kits, album covers, and t-shirts – everything from The Beatles to Snoop Dogg. Pick it up and see if you don’t get hooked – and wonder why Black Sabbath needed so many damn logos.

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You’ll weep, you’ll awww, you’ll get plenty of points from your significant other if you pick her up a copy of the new Bridges Of Madison County (Warner Bros., Rated PG-13, DVD-$19.98 SRP), featuring an audio commentary, a making-of featurette, a music video, and the theatrical trailer.

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Like According To Jim, Two And A Half Men (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$44.98 SRP) is certainly not appointment viewing, but if it’s all that’s one, it certainly isn’t painful to watch. It just sort of exists in a marginal comedic limbo… And that’s fine with me. Every generation needs its Coach and Wings. The 4-disc set features all 24 episodes, plus a gag reel.

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Surprisingly enough, Sean Combs acquitted himself quite well in last year’s TV adaptation of A Raisin In The Sun (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$24.94 SRP). See for yourself with the special edition DVD, containing an audio commentary and a behind-the-scenes featurette.

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One of those programs that will always grab my attention if insomnia or boredom has me scanning channels at 4 in the morning is anything with forensic examiner Dr. Michael Baden. An all-new edition of Autopsy: Postmortem with Dr. Michael Baden (HBO, Not Rated, DVD-$19.98 SRP) is now available on DVD, packed with more stories of forensic detective work that put C.S.I. to shame.

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So there you have it… my humble suggestions for what to watch, listen to, play with, or waste money on this coming weekend. See ya next week…

-Ken Plume

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Trailer Park: There Are No Nudie/Pastie Shots Of Megan Fox In This Article.

Filed under: Trailer Park — admin @ 1:21 am

By Christopher Stipp

The Archives, Right Here

I’m awesome. I wrote a book. It’s got little to do with movies. Download and read “Thank You, Goodnight” right HERE for free.

“And I’d like to state, for the record, right now – I love pornography. Love it. I have tapes that are pure fucking art, I’m telling ya. People fucking, sucking, every imaginable position, the finest looking women, fucking, sucking – I love it…That is one of my big fears in life, that I’m gonna die, you know, and my parents are gonna come to clean out my apartment, find that porno wing I’ve been adding onto for years. There’ll be two funerals that day. I can see my mom going through my stuff. ‘Look, honey, here’s Bill when he was a Cub scout. Look at how cute my baby is. His little short pants, his little hat. Look how cute my baby was. I wonder what’s in this box over here. ‘Rear Entry’, Volumes One through Forty?’ Eeeeerrrr, CRASH! The only guy going through the gates of Heaven with his mom spanking him.”

-Bill Hicks, Relentless, 1991

One of the smaller victories this week came in the form of the recently updated Archives in which I finally carried over all the remaining articles from my Movie Poop Shoot days (cue Wonder Years theme song and a single halcyon induced tear down my face) to this hopefully last stand at Quick Stop. Now you can mindlessly and needlessly check up on the past 4+ years worth of material I have been churning out.

I did wonder, though, as I was compiling all this crap together: Is any of this any good, really? Would someone have paid me for it, save for the outlandish idea of writing an entire weekly column to movie trailers, looking back on it? Since it frightened me too much to think about it too long I pressed on in my weekend and caught two films which don’t need me to review any more than the hundreds of articles already written on them. However, I do have this piece of advice for anyone thinking about taking Mom and Dad to the movies…and which subsequently dovetails nicely with the above quote…

Do NOT take anyone who was responsible for your baby batter to see FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL unless you want to be very uncomfortable as I was where there was copious and obnoxiously needless nudity.

I admit it. It was my fault. It was so my fault. I knew you’d see Jason Segel’s wang in full frontal fury but, Goddamn, by the time you were introduced to Jack McBrayer’s perverted world where the comedy really isn’t funny as it is just an excuse to have extended moments where you’re not sure if it’s supposed to be amusing or not; there are shots that linger way too long on this religious couple. Now, I could be wrong as having my mother sitting close by me genuinely triggered something biological in me which I don’t yet fully understand.

As well, I had a professor in college who taught a writing course and one of the lessons he really drove home to me was when you had a script/story/whatever in front of you there has to come a time when you go back and weigh each word, each moment with equal parts scrutiny and decision about whether it adds to the overall thrust of the story. Jason’s choices of what he chose to keep in the film and the pieces/moments which just felt like unnecessary filler happened more than once.

It could have been embarrassment but since I was more interested in trying to comprehend why many a critic has put this on their list of favorites for the year. I’m not a prude, and I always feel more nudity in films is a good thing for all involved, but apart from moments when you were wondering whether seeing Jason’s cock was really necessary to make things “funnier”, the ending was predictable, Bill Hader was all but a waste, the conceit was glaringly pedantic and plodding and I’m not sure if anyone else but Apatow was connected with the production of this film whether this film could have risen above the spec stage but it sure doesn’t feel like a film that deserves the attention it has received.

In other news, I saw IRON MAN. And, beside the soul-crushing, generic sounding a-chords that were used in all the fight sequences, it actually deserved the money it took from me. Loved it.

Ray also saw it and his review will appear at the end of the article. You’ve got to check out the way he words his passion for this film.

STEP BROTHERS (2008)

Director: Adam McKay
Cast: Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Mary Steenburgen, Richard Jenkins
Release:
July 25, 2008
Synopsis: Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly, who last teamed in the box-office smash Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, now star in Step Brothers, directed by Adam McKay (Talladega Nights). In Step Brothers, Ferrell plays Brennan Huff, a sporadically employed thirty-nine-year-old who lives with his mother, Nancy (Mary Steenburgen). Reilly plays Dale Doback, a terminally unemployed forty-year-old who lives with his father, Robert (Richard Jenkins). When Robert and Nancy marry and move in together, Brennan and Dale are forced to live with each other as step brothers. As their narcissism and downright aggressive laziness threaten to tear the family apart, these two middle-aged, immature, overgrown boys will orchestrate an insane, elaborate plan to bring their parents back together. To pull it off, they must form an unlikely bond that maybe, just maybe, will finally get them out of the house.

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Prognosis: Negative. I don’t know if this is supposed to be funny or if this is supposed to be a bizarre take on the trailer process in general, thus it may be too highfalutin for my pleebian brain, but this trailer is kinda horrible.

Actually, it’s a whole lot of terrible.

Based on the mediocre, 1st weekend success of SEMI-PRO you would think there would be some kind of call to quality control for these Ferrell flicks. True, he did not pair up with comedic stalwart Adam McKay and there is the very real feeling in many circles that this could be the reason why the film didn’t represent as well as it should have, that STEP BROTHERS is going to be the real deal but I don’t see any evidence of that here. In fact I would go on to assert that what you have in this trailer is a bizarre sequence of scenes that are neither funny nor appeal to the grown fratboys who flock to these films like Adam Sandler’s aging base has been so solid in doing.

The opening moments of the trailer encapsulate everything I’m about to dissect. We have a moment of introduction for these two grown men, Brennan and Dale, but the musical bed “North American Scum” by LCD Soundsystem is absolutely the wrong choice. Yeah, it feels all kinds of “edgy” in the way that suits hate but I hate it too. It’s trying to ape those certain qualities of irreverence that made NAPOLEON DYNAMITE such an individualistic coup. I’m assuming we’re all supposed to be fawning over the brilliance of the opening but it doesn’t get any better when we move in to the 26th second of the trailer to get what this movie is about.

These two guys have to live with one another? Will telling his stepbrother how much he wants to beat the other up when he falls asleep? The ubiquitous line in the sand where Reilly yells at Will to never touch his drums is a pathetic segue into something, again, that’s supposed to be funny but with Will shirtless (can he go for one movie where he’s not naked in the promotional material?) banging the drums the payoff just isn’t worth it.

I will concede that the quick clips of the two of them fighting and making up, the moment where Reilly is dumped into a shallow grave is a good one, and the realization that the two of them would have sex with John Stamos if they had to, are good. As is the scene with Will and John in an interview together, wearing tuxes no less, and Will goes on to berate the interviewer. These are the moments that would get me to see this film.

And, to heap a little more praise on this film, while I cannot get behind the idea that these guys can’t defend themselves against a phalanx of squat little kids I did enjoy seeing these two dudes build a bunk bed that was doomed. The visual setup and payoff for this gag was equal parts staged and funny.

I’m still of the belief, though, that this trailer suffers from an identity crisis. It tries to embed elements that will make it seem like it’s completely original but it fails to properly mesh mass populist comedy with giving us the wink and nudge to all of us who have been enjoying the strangeness of Ferrell’s and Reilly’s Funny or Die websidoes.
PINEAPPLE EXPRESS (2008)

Director: David Gordon Green
Cast: Seth Rogen, James Franco, Gary Cole, Rosie Perez, Danny McBride, Amber Heard
Release:
August 8, 2008
Synopsis: Next summer, the guys who brought you Superbad reunite for the action-comedy Pineapple Express. Lazy stoner Dale Denton (Seth Rogen) has only one reason to visit his equally lazy dealer Saul Silver (James Franco): to purchase weed, specifically, a rare new strain called Pineapple Express. But when Dale becomes the only witness to a murder by a crooked cop (Rosie Perez) and the city’s most dangerous drug lord (Gary Cole), he panics and dumps his roach of Pineapple Express at the scene. Dale now has another reason to visit Saul: to find out if the weed is so rare that it can be traced back to him. And it is. As Dale and Saul run for their lives, they quickly discover that they’re not suffering from weed-fueled paranoia; incredibly, the bad guys really are hot on their trail and trying to figure out the fastest way to kill them both. All aboard the Pineapple Express.

View Trailer:
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Prognosis: Positive. There are a lot of things I didn’t like about the trailer for SUPERBAD, wonderful of a movie as it was, and KNOCKED UP, a miserable movie as it was.

The hackneyed approach to explaining comedy is that it’s the hardest content to try and produce but trying to make someone giggle or titter, if there is such a physical reaction, is an art form within the trailer genre. What KNOCKED and SUPER lacked in trying to convey its wittiness PINEAPPLE EXPRESS does it wonderfully.

The opening is what starts this trailer off on a splendid note. It’s such a minimalist intro that it almost made me worry about when the voice over was going to kick in. Normally I would take it as a bad sign if you were to begin a trailer with a Boom-Chicka-Bomb-Bomb type of noodling on the guitar but Seth is bloody brilliant in establishing his Everyman-ness. As he mutters “Cops, Cops, Cops” it’s apparent that the movie wants to keep Seth’s character in seemingly every film as a schlub.

Franco’s stoner is one that is much more engaging and funny to look at and it damn near reminds me of the last stoner I came to love with repeat viewings, Floyd from TRUE ROMANCE.

“A server, like a butler?”

These two seem like a good buddies and I believe it. I’m not prodded by some cards or some overpowering voiceover and instead of focusing on how completely high Saul is the two of them have chemistry with one another that I can buy. Further, as we really get into what is afoot with this film, we learn organically that this all has to do with Rogan’s witness to a murder, DIE HARD style, along with a seriously funny moment of him trying to flee the scene.

Cut to Seth flipping out with James and the game is afoot. In fact, one of the reasons why this trailer is so effective is that it just cuts through all the superfluous and needless hamming for the camera and gives us some real conflict. I happen to be a huge Craig Robinson fan and seeing him clap like a schoolgirl in anticipation of kicking some ass is a real treat.

I have to also give a hand to the inclusion of M.I.A.’s “Paper Planes” to set the funky events in motion as Seth and James start heading out of town to avoid being shot. One of the more curious shots, to wit, is of Rogen’s Super Fly Snooka move from the turnbuckle. He seems to be nearly flying down to capture his prey and it’s a real stand-out as this seems to show that this is more than just two potheads on the run; we’ve got ourselves some real violence to look forward to.

And Franco getting his foot stuck in the windshield of the cop car he’s commandeered? Priceless. Count me in, finally, in advance for a movie brought to me by the people who had a fist in the making of SUPERBAD.

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And now, from the warped, bent, broken and barely intact mind of Ray Schillaci…Reviews for IRON MAN, DEATH OF A GHOST HUNTER, SKID ROW and FLYBOYS

True Mettle Behind the Iron

Okay, while my cohort, Chris, made nice-nice to his wife and indulged her with the sub-par chick flick, “Made of Honor,” yours truly acted like a real man and ticked his spouse off. She insisted I get out of the house and take the kids with me. There was a method to my madness (rarely do you want to tick off a woman part Cherokee/Scottish descent) – with a busy weekend ahead of us, I wanted to catch “Iron Man” before anybody told me anything about it. And, I had little desire to suffer through another Patrick Dempsey pretty-boy flick with wife pining over him. I liked him better before the nose job.

Not only did I take my 8 and 14 year-old boys but I invited my 71 year-old hip dad as well. And, just as I predicted, IRON MAN entertained all. It has that whiz-bang-WoW factor that makes you feel like a kid again. There are two primary reasons for this, the canny (no pun intended – really) performance of Robert Downey Jr. and Jon Favreau’s love-of-comics directing.

Downey is as much IRON MAN as Harrison Ford was Indiana Jones or Sean Connery was James Bond. He is both funny, flippant, torn and driven as the son of a once famous industrialist. His portrayal as Tony Stark is spot on, perhaps even better than the original Marvel comic character himself. I was never a big Iron Man reader. I found Marvel’s Stark rather dull and obtuse. Besides that, there seemed to be far more interesting characters inhabiting the Marvel universe at the time. The only other one I could care less about was Thor – Shakespeare in super hero garb.

My interest heightened, as I got older, especially having seen a replica of IRON MAN encased in a glass cylinder at the once popular Marvel Super Hero Restaurant at Universal’s City Walk. As Marvel super heroes have been introduced to the big screen we can tell the difference between those who are just making another movie and those in love and respectful of the comic book world.

Favreau clearly tosses his ego aside and lays the groundwork for an updated story that does not tarnish the original work. If anything, he improves upon the legend and has us begging for more. There is no hidden agenda as of some comic book characters of late, nor is there any highly stylized romantic notions, which burdened “Superman Returns”. Also gone is any tongue-in-cheekiness that ruined the Shumacher directed Batman sequels. This is a straightforward telling with a master’s touch that transcends the audience into geek fandom with glee. It’s funny without being stupid or winking at us. The drama makes you cringe. And, the side note regarding responsibility of the proliferation of military technology is a good lesson shelled out.

I am not one to spell out a good story and ruin it with spoilers, especially one that is this enjoyable. There is such a glut of garbage entertainment out there that’s barely worth renting. This pre-summer blockbuster is so much better than its predecessors that it deserves multiple theatrical viewings. Even my dad walked out at the end and said, “That was made so well. They can make a bunch of those.” We just hope the assembly line continues the quality.

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Less Spills, Minor Chills

Sean Tretta, Phoenix Filmmaker (Producer/Director/Writer and so much more), better known for his torture porn straight to DVD outings The Last American Snuff Film and Death Factory: Bloodletting displays some restraint and maturity with Death of a Ghost Hunter. Not all of it works but it does elicit some unsettling chills. The introductions feel forced and amateurish. And, at times DGH feels derivative in so many ways that I will not bother counting them. The ghostly tale has even been told better till that damn religious hood/box is introduced to us. That little invention cooked up by writers Mike Marsh and Sean Tretta appears as if it stepped out of the mind of Clive Barker to torment the hell out of us and that’s when …Ghost Hunter takes off.

If only the acting was as good as that box. It’s passable with the exception of Lindsay Page who is downright annoying. She’s too obvious in everything she does. You can read her a mile away. In fact, ten minutes into the movie, I knew she would be the impetus of all evil to come our way. It may not be entirely her fault. Hers is a character taken out of so many Stephen King novels (The Mist, most recent), the religious zealot gone awry. That being said, the story goes from mundane to creepy, then surprisingly creepier only to have the ending disappoint.

The film unfolds as a popular “ghost hunter” Carter Simms joins three other people, a cameraman, a reporter and spiritual advocate, played by Page, to either prove or disprove a haunting. The usual readings and sightings ensue and midway through that hood/box shows up and has the tale take a twisted turn. That device is nearly as fascinating as the puzzle box introduced in the Hellraiser series.

Tretta displays efficiency with budget and story. Unfortunately, he may not be rewarded for his restraint, which may lead him back to the torture porn arena for the fast cash. Technically he can use some refinement but he does know how to elicit a sense of creepiness and he can be inventive at times. The movie is worth a rental for a fun spook fest. Not everybody will be thrilled with the end, but I’m one of those people that enjoyed the guilty pleasures of Death Tunnel even with a so-so ending. Call me and the audience at the Phoenix Film Festival gluttons for punishment.

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Scared Straight on Skid Row

Many years ago I had the unenviable task of being sent on location to downtown L.A. The area had been sectioned off for a shoot but that did not stop the residents from checking us out and letting us know we were invading their turf, which was not far from Skid Row. The place reeked of garbage, alcohol and urine. It was littered with beer cans and bottles; smut papers and magazines stuck together, half eaten food, and the human trash that occupied their favorite corners. It was an unsettling experience and I wanted get home as fast as possible and take a long hot shower afterwards.

The documentary, Skid Row, takes you where few have been and forces you to witness the ugly situation in a different light. This is not about answers nor is it a precautionary tale. Instead the producers and directors, Niva Dorell, Marshall Tyler and Ross Clarke, ask the viewers to take home a different perspective – these people are real with real problems that have never been addressed properly. Society has not only sectioned them off but has also cloaked them with invisibility. This documentary lifts the cloak and unveils the fragile and sad side of humanity. The fact is further hammered through the eyes of Pras Michel best known from the very successful hip-hop band The Fugees.

Pras accepts the unenviable task of living as a homeless person on Skid Row for nine days with nine dollars to his name followed by hidden cameras. Sometimes those cameras are not as well hidden which leads to uncomfortably dangerous situations. At first, this may sound like a bad realty show, but in fact it’s the type of realty that the general media shuns because it’s not considered harmless/mindless entertainment.

The documentary includes interviews with police and politicos but most genuine is the Director of Public Affairs for the Midnight Mission, Orlando Ward. His insight, heart and passion for what he does are nothing short of remarkable. Mr. Ward was once a resident of Skid Row and speaks from experience. The cameras may be following Pras but Mr. Ward is the turnkey of this jolting documentary. He draws you into the lives of these people and asks that you recognize them as human beings. If they come up to you and ask for money, he insists that ignoring them is far more damaging than denying them the change you may have in your pocket.

Pras discovers this early on and becomes resentful and glimpses what it’s like to be a non-person. This hip-hop star is thrown into the mix of prostitutes, drug dealers, addicts and people struggling just to survive the following day. This is a real life human drama in its darkest days. Writing about this does not do justice to living it like Pras or the rest of the residents on that 50 square block area in downtown Los Angeles.

The problems with Skid Row are exactly what make it such a powerhouse of raw emotions. The camera and sound work is all over the place at times but the options were few to capture the results of Pras’ odyssey. We are even treated to the problems with the hidden cameras and Pras. At one point, Pras takes us into an underground garage and has it out with the crew for not only endangering his life but possibly jeopardizing the whole shoot over a couple of not so discriminate shots.

The film reminds me of the famous 1980 documentary, Scared Straight, where convicts talked to troubled teens about prison life. That film changed a great many young lives for the better. It was shown in schools and aired during prime time for maximum effect. The same should be done with Skid Row. We, the audience, at the Phoenix Film Festival had to catch our breath after watching this powerful piece of work. When I relayed that to one of the producers, he hugged me and stated, “We can make a difference!” Yes, we can, if we address rather than ignore. See this film and have your young teens watch it with you. It will make a difference.

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Up, Up and Away

Before The Flyboys started, one of the producers mentioned that they had already shopped the film to the majors and were turned down flat. Their hopes were now relying on festivals and minor distributors. What a shame. This film is a crowd pleaser even with its problems, which are minor, compared to some of the major CGI-ridden junk out there. In fact, that may be the only reason why they were not picked up. Imagine a film relying on story and not a slew of CGI. Perhaps if they had thrown in an ogre and a lightening bolt or two, Fox and Walden Media would have nabbed it even if it were sleep inducing, which The Flyboys is not.

It dashes about making you laugh and cheer while reminding you what it was like to be young again. It resembles a real good episode of Spielberg’s Amazing Stories. In fact, there happens to be a big early Spielberg influence throughout the film. The small rural area, the kids, the good-hearted and bad adults – even the soaring musical score that takes us into the unfriendly skies.

The movie starts off likeable as a fatherless young boy, Kyle, moves into town and defends another bullied young boy, Jason, with humor and smart fighting skills. Kyle tries to teach Jason how to stick up for himself even when the odds are against you. The two become fast friends and enjoy taking secret rides in the air with Jason’s uncle who is a pilot at a small airfield. The story is pure joy until things take a turn for the worse when the two boys accidentally stow away aboard an airplane with drastic results.

Here is where the problem lies, after a good 30 minutes of fun we are suddenly knee-jerked into a back-story explaining why the boys should have never gone near the plane. It’s owned by likeable mobster played by Tom Sizemore and is eventually sabotaged by his likeable loser brother played by Stephen Baldwin. Wait a minute, likeable and mobster do they really go together? Well, it did with The Sopranos, and Sizemore gets away with it a lot better than Baldwin. Not to say Baldwin is bad. He just does not fit in the suit as well as Sizemore. Sizemore plays a range of emotions and is believable for the most part. But the whole gangster back-story feels forced for the first ten minutes or so. Once we realize how this will affect our two young heroes it becomes more engaging, and the audience ends up eating it up with its faults anyway. I must mention this film contains one of the most thrilling aerial sequences I have seen in years.

I wish I had taken my kids to The Flyboys because I know they would have loved it and overlooked its problems. Of course, this is not for the discriminate viewer who prefers foreign films and meat with their drama. Some may complain it’s too schmaltzy, too silly, not believable, but that did not stop the audience I was with from cheering and applauding every phoned in moment. It even dares to elicit a touching tear or two.

Looking back, I cannot tell you how much more I appreciated this movie over some of the horrible boring messes I have taken my kids to. Mobsters with a heart beat out regurgitated CGI and a confusing story any day of the viewing week. If you liked taking your kids to Goonies or Monster Squad then come on board with The Flyboys.

Win THE CLASSIC SCI-FI ULTIMATE COLLECTION BOX SET on DVD!

Filed under: Contests — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:40 am

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We’re giving away, in conjunction with Universal Home Entertainment, ten (10) copies of THE CLASSIC SCI-FI ULTIMATE COLLECTION BOX SET on DVD.

Contest ends at 11:59pm EST on Friday, May 23rd.

CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Friday, May 23rd.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

May 15, 2008

Win MOONDANCE ALEXANDER on DVD!

Filed under: Contests — UncaScroogeMcD @ 5:29 am

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We’re giving away, in conjunction with Fox Home Entertainment, three (3) copies of MOONDANCE ALEXANDER on DVD.

Contest ends at 11:59pm EST on Thursday, May 22nd.

CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Thursday, May 22nd.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

May 14, 2008

Win 27 DRESSES on DVD!

Filed under: Contests — UncaScroogeMcD @ 6:34 pm

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We’re giving away, in conjunction with Fox Home Entertainment, three (3) copies of 27 DRESSES on DVD.

Contest ends at 11:59pm EST on Wednesday, May 21st.

CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Wednesday, May 21st.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

Toy Box: Elvis is in da church!

Filed under: Toy Box — admin @ 12:58 am

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Mcfarlane toys has done plenty of music figures, but one of their more popular series has been Elvis. WIth about a half dozen versions of the world renowned singer under their belt, they’ve managed to capture quite a few of his classic looks.

The latest in the series is called Gospel Elvis. Now, this name is a bit of a lie, as it’s not based on him singing any actual gospel music. He sang the inspirational song If I Can Dream in a very gospel-like style…or so says the packaging insert. I don’t know, it seems a bit of a stretch to me, but I suppose they needed to come up with a name, and ‘white suit Elvis’ wasn’t as catchy.

“Gospel Elvis”

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Elvis is shipping soon to retailers, although online options are probably your best bet. Some stores like Hot Topic or FYE mght get him in, but I have some online suggestions at the end of the review. Expect to pay around $15, depending on the retailer.

Packaging – ***
The clamshells do their job, but I wish the look of the insert was a little more interesting. Still, the basic black with the lighted Elvis name does show off the white suit pretty well, and the give you the personalized description on the back.

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Sculpt – **1/2
Most of the McToys Elvis figures have been extremely well done. One disappointed me, but that was a fluke. Until now.

The Gospel Elvis has a reasonably dynamic and interesting pose, with the body and hands lending themselves to his emotional performance. The left hand is holding the microphone, which has a cord that runs down slightly longer than the ground. That means you can hide the enf of the cord conveinently.

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Of course, like most Nerd Hummels, you better like this pose because it’s the only one you’ll be getting. And while it’s acceptable, it just doesn’t have the visual impact of the Jailhose Rock set or the 68 Comeback figure.

The head sculpt is where it really falls off, however. Part of this is an issue with the sculpt itself, but I suspect part of it is due to the manufacturing process, where it appears that the figures are being pulled out of the mold too soon, allowing some deformation to occur.

And deformed he is. The right side of the face is smooshed a bit, looking a bit like Mild Stroke Elvis. The face also looks bloated, as though he’s retaining an awful lot of water. I don’t think this version is *quite* as off as the Blue Hawaii version, but they’re neck and neck down the stretch.

Elvis is in what McToys calls a six inch scale, and he will fit in fine size-wise with the other Elvis’.

Paint – **1/2
Unlike one of the McToys monsters, there’s not a lot of detailed paint work here. Some of it is extremely good, including the jewelry and the work around the mouth. Other areas though are a bit lacking, and they include the large sections like his suit. Mcfarlane often uses a slight wash or a dry brushing to give figures a gritty appearance. While i don’t think they actually used either technique on Elvis’ suit, the white has that dingy look to it, like old socks. I brightened the suit a little in the photo below to see if there was a big difference, and I think there is.

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My Elvis also has a weird lump on the right side of his face. I think it’s a clump of dirt or plastic in the paint, which is why I’m complaining…uh, mentioning it here.

Articulation – *1/2
There’s a cut neck, cut shoulders, cut wrists and a cut waist. But these joints are only there to make very minor adjustments to get him in his one true intended pose, not to get creative. If you know this is just a plastic statue going in, then you probably won’t mind, but I wouldn’t want the uninformed to be surprised. And if you don’t like the sculpted pose, I don’t want you to think there’s much you’re going to be able to do about it.

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Accessories – *1/2
The only true accessory is the small black display stand. It works fine, but it was a bit disappointing to see that there was no cardboard backdrop for it. The thin paper insert in the package has the red lit Elvis on the black background, but this is too thin for you to use with any success.

You can get him to stand without the base if you really work at it, but I wouldn’t suggest it. The others all have similar bases anyway, so using it when displaying them together makes the most sense.

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Value – **
At what seems to be an average price of $15, these guys have gone up much like everything else. Unfortunately, what you’re getting isn’t really worth the increase. Ten bucks would be great…even twelve would get you another half star here. Grab it at $13, which some stores have it at, and you’ll be a lot happier then at the average price.

Fun Factor – *1/2
Elvis figures aren’t intended to be toys – they’re Nerd Hummels. And I don’t think Hummels, old fart version or nerd version, are all that much ‘fun’. They should look nice on the shelf if they are to fulfill their purpose. Since I know this is a Nerd Hummel going in, I won’t be docking the figure overall any for a low score here, but it’s still worth talking about.

Things to Watch Out For –
Clearly, you’ll want to watch the paint to avoid getting an Elvis like mine, with the lump on his face. Otherwise, you’re probably going to get just about what you see.

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Overall – **1/2
Of the 7 Elvis figures in this scale so far, I think this one is tied for last with the pitiful Blue Hawaii version. If you’re a completist, by all means, pick this one up. But if you’re on a limited budget looking for the best version, stick with either the Jailhouse Rock or Comeback figures.

Where to Buy –
There are a number of online options I recommend:

Clark Toys has a great price at $13.

Amazing Toyz matches that great price of $13.

Things from Another World has him at just $13.50.

Urban Collector has him listed at just under $15.

YouBuyNow has him at $17.

– for the UK fans, you can pick him up at Forbidden Planet for about 10 GBP.

Related Links –
I’ve covered a couple of the other Elvis’ versions, of of which I liked better than this guy. There’s the 60’s Comeback, the boxed set, and the excellent Jailhouse Rock.

May 12, 2008

SModcast 49

Filed under: SModcast — Tags: , , , , , — UncaScroogeMcD @ 12:25 am

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Your TextSModcast is the meandering palaver of a pair of dudes whose voices are so dull, they don’t deserve to be on the radio (and, hence, aren’t). Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier are SModcast.

The best thing about SModcast? It don’t cost nothing.

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SModcast 49: Attack of the Banantulas –

In which our heroes cock an eye at a prairie legend, fret over eight legged stalkers, fear a Swedish Holocaust, and take issue with the plausibility of singing underwater.

[CONTENT WARNING] SModcast features harsh language and even harsher notions of propriety. Listener discretion is advised.

DOWNLOAD: (right click to save)
SModcast 49 (MP3 format) – 48.45 MB

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Wanna add your two cents? Spend it here, in the SModcast mailbag.

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TV Or Not TV: 5/12 – 5/18

Filed under: TV Or Not TV — admin @ 12:11 am

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Welcome one and all to the great slow down, 2008!

That’s right boys and girls, the finales are upon us, in some cases they have passed us, and there are only a few more on the horizon. Soon we’ll see what the networks will do to try to keep our attention over the summer as they are still limping from the affects of the WGA Strike.

NBC announced a few weeks ago that one of the things they were going to do is to have a year round scheduling concept, something they have the luxury of doing as they are showing the Summer Olympic Games. I can’t wait to see what the other networks will do in response to this, other than flooding us with more reality programming.

Another interesting turn of events has occurred since last week, especially when you consider that article from Reaper star Bret Harrison asking us to mail socks the CW. Well, this week he posted a follow up which I find kind of funny as it isn’t a retraction but it definitely does some back peddling. On the other side of this issue you’ve got Kristin over at E!Online saying her sources tell her that Reaper is in fact going to get renewed for next season. I guess we’ll all find out together just how true this is on Tuesday.

Fans of LOST should remember to keep tonight’s show on their DVRs because you won’t be getting a new episode next week. The two hour finale, however, will be happening the week after.

All that being said, here’s the picks and pucks for this week.

MONDAY

FOX ““ 8:00 PM: In a move that screams catering to many a boyfriend and husband alike, a former American Idol contestant is murdered on tonight’s episode of Bones. Sorry guys, it’s not Clay Aiken.

CBS ““ 8:30 PM: She’s baaaaaaaaaaaaaack! Britney Spears reprises her role as Abby to allow her and Barney to annoy Ted on How I Met Your Mother. Even though NPH already came out I still see this as a better coupling than her and Kevin Federline.

ABC ““ 9:30 PM: It’s the season finale of Samantha, Who? and since the show has already been renewed it’s safe to watch and enjoy.

TUESDAY

NBC”“ 9:00 PM: Two hours of Law and Order: SVU tonight give us a chance to catch special guest star Robin Williams if we missed him in a repeat of last week’s episode, and we get the season finale in the second hour.

CW ““ 9:00 PM: Somehow a soul keeps getting back out on Reaper. This elusive guy must have snuck in to the CW and gotten the rumored renewal.

WEDNESDAY

FOX ““ 9:00 PM: The good news? The final two contestants are decided on tonight’s American Idol. The better news? Only one more week until and we’ll be done with Ryan Seacrest until New Year’s Eve.

SHOW ““ 9:00 PM: Nothing will make you cut up your plastic faster than watching Maxed Out: Hard Times, Easy Credit and the Era of Predatory Lenders.

THURSDAY

CW”“ 8:00 PM: In a season finale that’s premise baffles me completely, Lex and Clark are going to face off in a certain ortress-fay of olitude-say on Smallville. This season finale is bitter sweet in many ways as show creators Al Gough (who’s living room floor I slept on one night back in the 90’s) and Miles Millar will be leaving the show, as will Michael Rosenbaum (Lex) and Kristen Kreuk (Lana Lang). There’s no way that Lex will come away from this episode remembering anything because there’s no room in any universe for Lex Luthor knowing Clark Kent is in fact Superman.

NBC ““ 8:00 PM: Season finale night for My Name is Earl. Will Earl and his new bride work things out or will Randy be his only bed partner next season? Note to Greg Garcia, more list and less twist for next season, OK?

NBC ““ 9:00 PM: It’s also season finale night for The Office. Anyone giving odds on if Jim proposes to Pam tonight?

TCM ““ 8:00 PM: Capricorn One definitely has not aged well, but seeing them fake a Mars landing plays nicely for moon landing conspiracy files. We also get to see OJ Simpson eat a snake!

FRIDAY

CBS ““ 8:00 PM: Season finale night for Ghost Whisperer. I doubt they can top last season’s plane crash/someone’s dead reveal, but I hope they come close.

CARTOON NETWORK ““ 8:00 PM: The Warner Brothers direct to DVD movie The Batman vs. Dracula is available for free tonight.

SATURDAY

SCIFI ““ 4:00 PM*: You’ve got another chance to get your Indiana Jones on before the new movie comes out”¦ Raiders of the Lost Ark, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, and Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade are on back-to-back-to-back. *Check local listings.

HIST ““ 8:00 PM: Nothing is better for a Saturday than an uplifting show to cuddle up next to your loved one with. Last Days on Earth examines the seven of the deadliest threats to humanity including artificial intelligence and black holes, and will probably do wonders to get your significant other in the mood.

TLC ““ 9:00 PM: I really hate to keep bringing up the same show, but week after week Trading Spaces keeps delivering. If last week’s divorced couple wasn’t enough, this week it is feuding neighbors that are deciding to give redecorating for each other a go. Too bad their names won’t be Hatfield and McCoy.

SUNDAY

NBC ““ 8:00 PM: It’s two hours of The Office tonight, and I highly recommend the second hour. The story line of Michael being way over his head in debt pales in comparison to Jim and Pam’s stay at the Schrute Family Beet Farm/Bed & Breakfast.

ABC ““ 9:00 PM: ABC gives us a two hour season finale of Desperate Housewives. Watch as they drag out answering questions from this season and take two minutes to introduce a new one at the last moment to make sure you tune in next season.

HIST ““ 8:00 PM: The History Channel brings us a look at the fact or fiction of the artifacts hunted for by our favorite archeologist/adventurer in Indiana Jones and the Ultimate Quest.

Will Wilkins really should try reading once in a while.

Comics & Comics: Middle-Aged Men In The Hall

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Howdy Interwebbers. I’m Matt Cohen, and I now apparently dig The Kids in the Hall.

I was too young to really appreciate what they were doing when the show first aired in the early nineties. I remember watching it, but also remember being extremely creeped out by most of the characters and sketches. It was just too much for a seven-year-old to handle. Over the ensuing years, I would occasionally catch reruns of the show on Comedy Central, and though I would laugh, I think a lot of that childhood “creepiness” still lingered in my mind. I still didn’t give it a fair chance. And yet, I was a huge fan of all the Kids individually, following their solo careers and really enjoying them.

And then I just kind of forgot all about Kids in The Hall. I would see the DVD in stores but always pass it by with a quick glance. It just wasn’t on my radar.

That all changed on Friday night. Long story short, I bought a ticket on a whim last week to attend the Kids in the Hall reunion tour stopover in Los Angeles. After work, I headed home, ate a quick burger (gotta love In-N-Out) and jumped in my car to head downtown to the famous Orpheum theater. This was my first trip to Downtown LA and thankfully my navigation system didn’t fail me. I parked in a lot (and was a dollar short… but the guy let me slide. Shout out to Julio.) and sat in my car for a few minutes. I looked around at the others attending the show. It looked more like an audience for a Phish concert then a sketch comedy show. Mostly folks in their late thirties, bearded (the men, ya mooks), plain looking, and reeking of marijuana. In fact, the parking lot looked like there was a fog machine behind every other car. This threw me for a loop. Keep in mind, I did no prior watching of the series before the show, so I really had no idea what to expect from both the actual comedy and the crowd.

What had I gotten myself into?

What bizarre and crazy sights was I about to witness?

To put it simply – Bizarre and crazy sights… Freaking HILARIOUS ones.

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I took my seat in what is a beautiful and overwhelmingly awesome Orpheum Theater. A still of Kids in the Hall comedy CDs illuminated the screen on stage. The audience quickly filled into their seats, and at 8:10 P.M on the dot, a clip rolled. If you folks haven’t already seen it online, here it is. As the boys run out of screen on the clip, and the all too familiar theme song plays, they ran onto the stage, Kevin McDonald in a pair of “tighty whities” with an apple placed firmly in mouth. The place went absolutely wild, myself included. Here I was, not fully a “fan” of the troupe, standing on my feet and cheering loudly for their return. The crowd’s energy was infectious. I actually WAS psyched for this show now. I realized that I did like these guys, a lot in fact. The compounded bits and pieces I had seen over the years must have subconsciously gelled into an affinity for the show and its players. The first sketch soon started and the night was off.

I don’t want to go into each individual scene, because there were many, and frankly I don’t remember each one. The night kind of blurred into a haze of hysterics. In the following two hours, I saw characters old and new, some one’s I knew and liked, others, I forgot I knew and some flat out brand spanking new ones. The crew (as always, Dave Foley, Mark McKinney, Bruce McCulloch, Kevin McDonald and Scott Thompson) performed to the height of their ability, which in their cases is pretty damn high. Whether playing a normal average guy, or a sexed up Chicken Lady, the commitment of the performers never lacked – particularly Bruce McCulloch, who appeared to be having the time of his life on stage. Another interesting dynamic to the group is that there is no clear cut “leader”. In fact, I often found myself gauging the audience as to who their favorite kid was and, to tell the truth, each member got almost an equal amount of acclaim and applause (except for maybe Kevin, but that’s because he is everyone’s favorite awkward man-child and needs no further acclaim). Yes, some of the new sketches were a little bit lazy, but that is really not unique in the world of sketch comedy. Few troupes have been flawless (with the exception of perhaps Monty Python and Mr. Show, in my opinion) and the sketches that lacked had plenty of that Kids in the Hall brand irreverent and bizarre humor to keep the laughs flowing. Each member of the group also got a solo scene, which was nice, each differing vastly from their cohorts, my favorite being a narrative by Mark McKinney that caught me way off guard.

The format of the show was also something pretty great. Each sketch was preceded with a still photo and a sample of a high-energy song to keep the momentum rolling. There was hardly any downtime between bits, which also helped to give the show a sharp and concise feel to it. At a running time of about two hours, I for one never felt bored for a moment, and was quite sad when the show ended. And confused”¦ Before the show there was really only one character I remembered from the TV run, The “I’m crushing your head” man. And yet, he was suspiciously absent during the show. That was, until the encore started. And it was well worth the wait. If the Kids are making a stopover anywhere near you, I definitely would suggest checking them out. I can promise you a night which like you’ve never experienced before.

Well, tis all for now, happy campers. Till next morrow -and, as always,”Keep em’ bagged and boarded”

Matt Cohen is currently crushing your head.

May 11, 2008

Win THE MUPPET SHOW: SEASON 3 on DVD!

Filed under: Contests — UncaScroogeMcD @ 11:35 pm

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We’re giving away, in conjunction with Walt Disney Home Entertainment, three (3) copies of THE MUPPET SHOW: SEASON 3 on DVD.

Contest ends at 11:59pm EST on Monday, May 19th.

Check out the clips below…

Statler and Waldorf:

Deal’s Off:

CLOSED! THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Official Rules

No member of Quick Stop Entertainment or their immediate families may enter.

No Purchase necessary to win.

Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.

One entry per day, per person.

All submitted entries must be received by 11:59pm EST on Monday, May 19th.

The winner must allow 4-6 weeks after notification of win to receive the product.

May 10, 2008

Scrubs Blog: My Fairy Tale Ending

Filed under: Scrubs Blog — UncaScroogeMcD @ 4:54 am

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VIDEO BLOG #102: “My Fairy Tale Ending” ““
This week, we take an in-depth look at the filming of the conclusion of the 7th season’s finale. Things are always more interesting when a horse is involved.

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[flashvideo filename=”videos/scrubs/102_my_fairy_tale_ending_stream.flv” width=”480″ height=”360″ image=videos/scrubs/scrubs-102.jpg /]

Want to embed it in your blog? Use the code below…

Download Scrubs Video Blog #102:

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