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We here at Quick Stop Entertainment are true lovers of music, in all its forms. We’re also quite keen on the spirit of competition, and of spurring creativity through said competition.

To that end, we launched a unique form of creative combat here at the Stop.

In this age of manufactured and painfully earnest talent contests, we’ve decided to instead shine a light on the quirky, quixotic underworld of musicians that don’t get nearly the attention they deserve.

Ah, but I did mention that there was a competition involved…

Like a songwriting version of Iron Chef, the competitors will be presented with a very specific songwriting challenge. They’ll be given one week to complete their songs - however they see fit, within the parameters set forth - after which time the entries will be uploaded to Quick Stop to be voted on by you, the audience.

Oh, and what do we call this competition?



Let us not forget the very special Masters of MASTERS OF SONG FU. Think of them as the iron chefs of Song Fu - one of which will be revealed as your ultimate challenger in THE FINAL CHALLENGE. Past Masters have included Jonathan Coulton, Paul & Storm, Neil Innes, The RiffTones, and Garfunkel & Oates. Any one of them could be your final Challenge - or perhaps it could be a brand new Master. Only the Challenger who garners the most cumulative votes in all of the Challenges will move on to the Final and face that Master, mano a mano.

So what was the first Challenge?



This is a bit of a fun one. Your first task is based upon the work of Friend-of-the-Stop John Hodgman - specifically, the “700 MOLE MEN” listed in his second book, More Information Than You Require. You’ll find the full list of “700 Mole Men” - and their descriptions - HERE. Your task is to choose one (1) and write a song about that Mole Man, based on the description provided by Hodgman. The title of your song will be the name of the Mole Man you’ve chosen, and its corresponding number on the list. You are free to write your song in any style that you choose.

That’s it. The only other directive is that your song must run no shorter than 1 minute.




Governing Dynamics is the name of Travis Norris’s eternal sideproject, where all the stuff written by him goes when his current band (whatever it may be) refuses to play it. The music has been favorably compared to such bands as Eels, Radiohead, The White Stripes, and other bands that cool people like. It has been unfavorably compared to the tactics used by the FBI against the Branch Dividians at Waco. If he has to describe his music by genre (and refer to himself in third person) Travis calls it “alternative/shoegazer with a liberal dose of Midwestern rock”.
Official Website: governingdynamics.bandcamp.com
Twitter: twitter.com/travisnorris
ROUND 1 SONG:#288 Polly The Exhumer


songfu-jasonmorris.jpgI suppose I am what you could call a “Multi-Instrumentalist”. That is a nice way of saying “Jack-of-all-trades, Master-of-none”. I began playing drums as a teenager and spent a great deal of energy during my 20’s trying to “make it” in the music biz. As a drummer, I have had the opportunity to play with some pretty incredible musicians, garnering literally DOZENS of fans over the years. In 2004 I joined the band Celestial Static, and spent several years melting some face with good friends Jeremy and Julie Elzerman. Once that ran its course, I decided to spend more time locked away in my studio, writing my own songs and learning to play guitar, bass and sing. It doesn’t pay the bills, but I have a good time doing it.
Official Website: www.jason-morris.net
Twitter: twitter.com/JasonLMorris
ROUND 1 SONG:#019 Thomas Ashley Innersun


songfu-edrichaleen.jpgEdric is a returning veteran of the Masters of Song Fu competition. He has been writing music (off and on) since the early nineties. He wrote and directed a musical, The Pushcart War, based on Jean Merrill’s wonderful novel. He has written and/or arranged a number of songs for various friends - some commissioned, some as surprises. He loves acting in community theatre, and is inspired by the music of Stephen Sondheim, Jason Robert Brown, Adam Guettel, Lynn Ahrens and Stephen Flaherty. Also - feel free to check out (and add to!) the “Happiness Board” on his web pages!
Official Website: happinessboard.com/Edric_Haleen.html
ROUND 1 SONG:#138 Sir Isaac Quickmud


songfu-buckethatbobby.jpgI’m “BucketHat” Bobby Matheson. I used to make cartoons for the internet, and sometimes still do, but mostly focus on my music right now. I write and record my songs solo, in my little make-shift studio, and when I play live, I often get some help from friends. Some of my music is funny, and some isn’t. More often than not, the humour is unintentional. My Influences range from Klezmer to folk, to punk and back again, which ends up sounding more like Zydeco than anything else (who’d have guessed?). I’ve been described as a “Cajun Buddy Holly” and an “Optimistic Elvis Costello”. It’s been said that I sound like “That guy from the Barenaked Ladies” and a “Nasaly Bob Dylan”. One of these days, I hope to have a description that is accurate.
Official Website: www.buckethatbobby.randomsociety.com
Twitter: twitter.com/BucketHatBobby
ROUND 1 SONG:#139 Mr. Genuine Hissfurther


Tyler Massey is an uncomplicated person. He likes to sip Cristal and polish his yacht collection. He enjoys the simple things in life, like stepping on snails barefoot and nude origami. He wishes that he had a proper Hobo Name, and is open to suggestions.
Official Website: www.tylermassey.co.uk
Twitter: twitter.com/tylermassey
ROUND 1 SONG:#429 Mr Roughfingers and his ‘Louse’-estra


Legends foretell of a mighty duo, born in the frozen North. Two neighbors and friends will unite to form “Godz Poodlz” and battle the Mazters or Song Fu for glory and bragging rights! Godz Poodlz are Rüss Rogers and Rod Durre. Russ Rogers was once a member of “Kit and Kaboodle” (still available on iTunes) and currently performs in “Rusty’s Rocking Jamboree!” Rhod Durre was in the Goth Rock Band, “Sear!” Beware the Godz Poodlz Ear Worm! Godz Poodlz songs are bright, funny and tenaciously catchy. Come join Godz Poodlz Legionz of Fanz!
Official Website: www.myspace.com/godzpoodlz
ROUND 1 SONG:#381 Captain Dane Frostline


songfu-bramtant.pngBram Tant is a Belgian coputer science student with a distinct love for music. Ever since going to music school as a kid, he’s enjoyed singing and playing the guitar, and has been writing songs for some years now. While he’s still learning to play the guitar, sing and write songs better, he improves with each attempt, and he makes up for it (and the lack of proper recording equipment) with his passion and enthusiasm. He would like to become a professional musician someday, but for now he’s satisfied with writing and performing for friends, family, and strangers on the internet.
Official Website: studwww.ugent.be/~btant/

Twitter: twitter.com/dantesxx
ROUND 1 SONG:#666 Tommy Dickfish


songfu-stevechatterton.pngHi, my name is Steve Chatterton, the quintessential one-man-band singer/songwriter net-based recording project. Mom always said I marched to the sound of a different drummer, but she never mentioned which one. Dad had a fondness for bagpipes. Fortunately, neither of them have any direct influence on my music. Specializing in quirky little guitar-oriented pop songs about bugs, the Scooby gang, pirates, palindromes, superheroes, old movies, infectious diseases, imaginary friends and sideshow freaks, I guess you could say I pretty much write love songs. I’m a cheesy bastard at heart. I’m a stay-at-home dad who’s looking to find more time in the studio when my youngest starts school in September. I have an ever-expanding back catalog (at least 3 albums worth & counting) I’m dying to share with the world one download at a time.
Official Website: www.stevechatterton.com
Twitter: twitter.com/SteveChatterton
ROUND 1 SONG:#042 Miss Claudia Inward Burrowdown


Manitcess are Susanne Wolff (Lupa) on vocals and Johannes Schult (Jutze) on guitar. The duo plays melodic song somewhere between pop, folk and rock. Melodies are more important than trends. The band has already played various gigs in Germany and Switzerland and is eager to entertain - or better to enchant their audience with their musical tales.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/manticess
Twitter: twitter.com/schult
ROUND 1 SONG:#423 Red


Although he has no formal training, Jarrett is an accomplished pianist who has been composing music for nearly twenty years. A relative newcomer to the world of online amateur competitive songwriting, he burst onto the scene earlier this year when he filled out an entry form just before the deadline. While earning his living as a graphic artist and website developer, Jarrett secretly dreams of leaving behind the glamor and prestige of internet publishing so he can focus on composing music for songwriting contests full-time.
Official Website: www.spaceparanoids.net
Twitter: twitter.com/SpaceParanoids
ROUND 1 SONG:#042 Miss Claudia Inward Burrowdown


Forged in the furnace of irony, molded with the hammer of satire, flattened on the anvil of righteousness, and cooled in the water of awesomeness, AudioMohel was thrust upon the world. Named from the lost audio transcripts of ‘09, AudioMohel serves as a public-service backlash against the anti-circumcision trend sweeping the so-called “enlightened parents” crowd, AudioMohel urges their more devoted and impressionable fans to undergo the snip two or even three times. AudioMohel enjoys experimenting with new breakthrough genres like speed blues and death classical even though most of AudioMohel’s tunes reside firmly in the ethereal realm of vapor-ware.
Official Website: www.AudioMohel.com
Twitter: twitter.com/AudioMohel
ROUND 1 SONG:#471 Mr. Armskin


In the far off land of Chandler, Arizona, where the rivers flow with sand and cacti, our leader and master, the Lord of Our Lady Gwynyth, guitar and microphone in hand, called for the greatest musicians in the land to assemble a rock and roll group like none other. Unfortunately, they were cut off on the road, and the Jalapeño Habañeros made it there first. With The Rogue Bohemian on saxophone and The Boxcar Bassist on bass and keyboards, the Lord was pleased. Now, they roam the streets of Chandler, playing epic songs and rocking faces, much like Bon Jovi. Unfortunately they are paid in change, and often get thrown into the street, also like Bon Jovi. Their lives have intertwined, and the era of the Jalapeño Habañeros has begun. Be prepared.
Official Website: jalapenojabaneros.blogspot.com
ROUND 1 SONG:#604 Suction-Cupped Jonny


Hi, my name is Timothy. I like me. I like my school, I like my friends. I like to play the music. I very much enjoy the peoples. Thank you.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/tweed234
Twitter: twitter.com/TimmyVendetta
ROUND 1 SONG:#006 Sir Stinson Maggotwrangle


They are not some traveling country hillbilly act. They are celebrating the year of Jubilee in the form of ukulele based indie pop. They are Akiva Misto and Eliana Bartimeus and they are prepared to rock your yarmulkes!
Official Website: NONE
ROUND 1 SONG:#487 Lady Antonia Oddpolyps


songfu-gorbzilla.pngGorbzilla is a musician/band teacher in Mid-Michigan. He has been in a few bands over the years, most notably as the bass player/vocalist for the band “Satin Jones” and the guitarist/vocalist for the band “Jimmy Likes Pie”. The proud father of two future rock maniacs, Gorbzilla has been writing music for the past twenty years, and is currently working on his first musical Beer – Finally a Musical for Men based on the Haiku by Patrick “Horkmeister” Sweet entitled, “I Think I Threw Up”. He has been happily married for eight years, and is looking forward to this competition.
Official Website: gorbzilla.blogspot.com
ROUND 1 SONG:#414 Nick Nolte


Peter is a person of sorts. Since his birth he has consistently occupied himself with a variety of time consuming and completely un-noteworthy activities. Despite this breadth of experience he remains untalented in the ways of writing all encompassing 600 word essays. He does, however, greatly enjoy the rare treat that is writing about oneself in the third person, especially when such a gift should be presented to him at the wonderful time of 4AM. Peter now supposes that since this a musical competition he is entering, he might want to include something about that in his bio. At the way too old age of 18, Peter first attempted to play music. His guitar teacher warned him that he was much to old to begin training, and that he would probably be an emotionally unstable musician that would eventually turn to the dark side. Peter took no heed to this warning, and indeed dropped out of guitar lessons fairly quickly, realizing that he enjoyed learning much more when done alone. In the year and a half since then, Peter has been on a steady rise and will no doubt be taking the musical world by storm in the coming year. Perhaps his greatest musical moment came in December of 2008, when his Christmas caroling band, The Sizzle, took his small hick town by storm with a door to door tour through the suburbs, melting the figurative face of listeners with a funk/rap cover of Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer. In 2009 Peter has become active in the youtube community, known not for his music but for his notorious use of stop-motion eating scenes and a DIY laugh track. Hoping to hone his barely existing musical skills through the pressure of competition, Peter joins Round 5 of Song Fu. He sincerely hopes that rewriting this bio at a later date will be an option. The Peter Is Competing.
Official Website: www.youtube.com/user/thepeteris
Twitter: twitter.com/thepeteris
ROUND 1 SONG:#315 Mr. Dennimore Evercrouch


At the ripe age of 19, this strapping young lad has been song writing for two years now. With his mates Meredith and Cornelius (guitar and ukulele, respectively), Craig Richie is prepared to join the ranks of the Song Fu warriors. Finding strong influences from former masters JoCo and Molly Lewis, as well as pinches of Kimya Dawson and Elvis Costello, this boy’s got a perspective on the world to share.
Official Website: www.youtube.com/user/craigtotherichie
ROUND 1 SONG:#275 Mr. Owen Daylight


Josh was born in Canada, which probably explains more about him than anything else he could put in a bio. He plays the accordion, is self-taught on the piano, and highly enjoys playing and writing for both - though he rarely finishes anything without a deadline. With this grueling contest, he hopes to push himself to unleash the best Fu he possibly can… and hell, maybe even some he impossibly can. YARRR!
Official Website: www.youtube.com/user/PossessedRaccoon
ROUND 1 SONG:#422 Mokey


Many folks say that Aaron Z is a pretty cool guy. He plays too many instruments, but mostly piano & guitar. He wastes too much of his free time writing and performing music, which has been known to make people laugh, tough men cry, and ladies melt in his arms. His current projects include Orange Box: The Musical! and A Tribute to the Letter E. He likes food cooked with mushrooms and his favorite ice-creams are vanilla-based, not chocolate-based. Check out his music, including his previously-weekly but now faux-weekly music project on his website, plus his other cool music.
Official Website: aaronz.bandcamp.com
ROUND 1 SONG:#590 Harvey Rupert Elder


Spencer is trying to do things. Music is one of those things. It is painfully obvious to him, if not others, that he has absolutely no idea what he’s doing. In the past he has been musically inclined with a guitar and occasionally with a piano. He is trying to be musically active once again, but this time he is attempting to do so while on the Internets. Creating music is a large part of his 40×40 list and he thinks this competition seems like “a Super Mega Happy Fun way” to rekindle his musical desires.
Official Website: www.spencersokol.com
Twitter: twitter.com/spencersokol
ROUND 1 SONG:#298 Mr. Deadend


I’m Joe Covenant. I’m Scottish. And never have enough time to do everything I wanna! Been singing and perfoming for over 40 years… (yes, I am 46.)… and I’ve nearly learned a 6th chord! Everything I do. I do for Song Fu. (If not for this ‘contest’ I would have never met and collaborated with so many talented people.)
Official Website: joecovenant.bandcamp.com
Twitter: twitter.com/JoeCovenant
ROUND 1 SONG:#297 Mr. Tom Furby


Lex Vader was born to a single mother who worked as silicon tycoon’s personal assistant. When she died of poor hygiene, Lex was sent to an orphanage where he showed interest in organizing races and laser fencing. After being recruited into a religious order, he spent the next few years between several of their private schools. In his final year, Lex lost his hand in an argument with a professor over Kryptochlorians. Despite this, Lex was able to achieve a successful business career and even a knighthood. Tragedy struck, however, when a former classmate’s arctic home caught fire during a business lunch, scarring half of Lex’s face. At this point, Lex’s behavior became erratic. When he managed to buy SithCo, the cult that schooled him, he was shunned by the corporate world. No longer taken seriously, Lex started an evil empire and now moonlights with his evil emotronic alternapop band.
Official Website: lexvaderssecretjournal.wordpress.com
Twitter: twitter.com/LexVader
ROUND 1 SONG:#153 Permanent Unsex


Caleb became a software engineer instead of a musician because the type of music he likes best went out of style at the end of the 18th century. Self-taught in music theory, he is more comfortable writing a four-part instrumental fugue than he is writing a verse-chorus-bridge song. After discovering the likes of Weird Al, Dr. Horrible, and especially Jonathan Coulton, he realized that “modern music” can be fun too. Now he is on a quest to update, expand, and diversify his musical knowledge and experience. In addition to singing, he plays a whole family of recorders, baroque flute, ukulele, melodica, pretends to play keyboard, and most recently, guitar. He also uses virtual MIDI instruments because a real orchestra costs too much.
Official Website: refactoringmybrain.blogspot.com
Twitter: twitter.com/calebhines
ROUND 1 SONG:#490 Mr. Nehemiah Bloodwormer


Ian Johnson was born atop Mount Everest, was attacked by a troop of ninjas on his way out of the womb, then rode a grizzly bear down the mountain and punched Hitler’s ghost on the way down. Then he ate some mashed peas. Seriously though. Ian played piano for about six years before taking a break in music. Then he decided to play guitar, because as we all know, piano don’t get chicks. He started playing guitar about a year and a half ago. His music has been described (by himself) as garage-punk ska-esque acoustic altern-rock with just a little ukulele thrown in for good measure.
Official Website: ianjohnson.bandcamp.com
ROUND 1 SONG:#145 Mandibular-Jaw Johnny


Sometimes two people get together who are destined to make history. Sometimes they are born into the same family. zer0guy is the musical/life-partnership of Jon and Dan Kelly, long time musicians looking forward to placing notes in your head.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/zer0guyband
ROUND 1 SONG:#237 Dirtbag Dan


My current project is writing A Song a Day (Rock Cookie Bottom), and my former projects include The Last Nympho Leprechaun, a rock opera, The Mario Opera, a rock opera, GameJew, a web show, and The Mushroom Singdom, singing old school video game reviews.
Official Website: www.rockcookiebottom.com
ROUND 1 SONG:#612 Mr. Barry Screwskull


Sara Parsons is a twenty-year-old music composition student from northern California. She participated in Masters of Song Fu #4 and had a blast and met a ton of great people. She hopes she’s better at writing songs than she is at writing her own biography.
Official Website: www.youtube.com/user/sargeantketchup
ROUND 1 SONG:#573 Miss Miriam Poisonblisters


Chas Lilly is a man that needs introduction. He is geeky but hopefully without being boring. He has been known to write songs about Pluto, Tim Allen, funerals, and everything in between. People often describe his music as “music”.
Official Website: www.youtube.com/friendswobenefits
Twitter: twitter.com/foldsaholic
ROUND 1 SONG:#567 Mr. Angelo Openjaw


My name is Kylie, and I’m your everyday 17-year-old girl with a passion for music. I’ve been writing my own songs since I was ten years old, and nothing is more fun for me than to sit down with my guitar and unwind. I’d like to use Masters of Song Fu to really challenge myself, and hopefully grow as a musical artist.
Official Website: NONE
Twitter: twitter.com/KyliePetto
ROUND 1 SONG:#141 Devil Anse Doubledirt


Jeff began playing guitar in 2003. He wrote his first comedy song in early 2004, and later that year, he wrote a song that was actually funny and in key, unlike his earlier works. He began playing shows after accidentally opening for a local band while passing through a bar. He continues to play because nobody has told him to stop.
Official Website: www.JeffFardink.com
ROUND 1 SONG:#623 Jenna Frogtalker


I am a young musician who plays trombone, guitar, ukulele, piano, melodica, and a little bit of harmonica. I play everything from rock songs with distortion pedals on ukulele, to rap medleys on piano, to sappy love songs and songs about the internet crashing on guitar. This is my first time in Song Fu.
Official Website: NONE
ROUND 1 SONG:#604 Suction-Cupped Jonny


I’m just a kid with a guitar. Sometimes I even play it.
Official Website: NONE
ROUND 1 SONG:#580 Old Man Hades


Bob Westfall (guitar, mandolin, vocals, songwriting) has studied and worked with some of the top acoustic players in the country - Darol Anger, Mike Marshall, John Hartford, and Alex DeGrassi. But, while these influences are certainly evident, Westfall’s songwriting and lyrics are uniquely his own. An award-winning mandolinist, Bob grew up in Texas and Minnesota, and his style incorporates the best elements of composing with a hybrid jazz/pop/worldbeat/bluegrass feel.
Official Website: www.sonicbids.com/thebobwestfallband
ROUND 1 SONG:#023 Miss Annabelle Tunnelsmell


Did you ever wonder what it would be like to mix Ravishing Rick Rude and the Beatles together? Me too. Man that would be awesome. Justin Vega is a songwriter/sort of singer from Las Vegas, NV. Justin Vega thinks writing in third person is awesome.
Official Website: NONE
ROUND 1 SONG:#077 Dr. Hieronymous Sandpuppy


Simmbiosis - three part band. Defies the usual type or brand. A combo bred, in this strange head. The obscene voice the unseen hand. Terpsichore and muse imbued. Perverse perhaps a little rude. Music composed, a life exposed. Giving you all I can exude. Studio C where I compose. Club Bed where I take my repose. Iniquity, safe haven for me. The rest you’ll just have to suppose. To be among this crowd, auspicious. An honor bordering on delicious. Thanks to View Askew, I’ll whip out my Song Fu. And work not to be repetitious, repetitious, repetitious.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/simmbiosis
ROUND 1 SONG:#646 Hydrostatic Charlie


To download a ZIP FILE containing all of the ROUND 1 songs, CLICK HERE.



And now, it’s time for that all important voting. For this round, you can choose your TOP 5 FAVORITE Challenger songs. Be sure to choose carefully. VOTING CLOSES AT 11:59pm EST on SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 22nd. If you are having trouble voting, CLEAR YOUR BROWSER’S CACHE and try again. PLEASE NOTE: This voting system bases voting eligibility on your IP Address. If there are other computers on a home or business network that share the same IP address through a router, it may say you’ve already voted. Unfortunately, there is no way around this, and still be able to prevent ballot stuffing. It’s just the nature of the online voting beast.



[poll id="21"]

View Results


If you triumph, not only will you win remarkable (and potentially off-putting) bragging rights and a clutch of fantastic mystery prizes, you will also become the proud owner of the magnificent, one-of-a-kind MASTER OF SONG FU TROPHY.

Good luck, and bring on the Fu.




70 Responses to “Masters Of Song Fu #5: Round 1 Challenge Voting Begins!”

  1. Ian"Two Shades" Johnson Says:

    Great job everyone! Can’t wait for the next challenge, see what you guys are bringing!

  2. Cat Samford Says:

    I LOVE Bobby’s song it’s just too much awesome!

  3. Edric Says:

    Hello, all!

    This is so exciting that Song Fu is back up and running! I look forward to hearing the rest of the songs that I missed before I made it to last night’s listening party.

    If you’re interested, this link — http://happinessboard.com/Sir_Isaac_Quickmud.html — will take you to a page with lyrics and a peek at the “science behind the song.”

    And, just for the record — the full title of my song is:

    Sir Isaac Quickmud [No. 138]

    (as taught by Mr. Bradford York Puke-Marbles [No. 179] to his students; including Miss Minnie Rubble-Cone [No. 59], Miss Helena Cough-Cough [No. 87], and Miss Lillian Bugcruncher [No. 95], with peripheral references to Lord Noah Fungalgrowth [No 201] and Mr. Icarus Flamingskin [No. 701].)


  4. simmbiosis Says:

    Composed my mole song for Fu
    Submitted it on Friday too
    The voting is on
    I appear to be gone
    What is a Song Fuer to do

  5. J.T. Mints of the Jalapeo Jabaeros Says:

    It’s good to be back! All of us in the Double J missed slingin’ our Fu. We’re steadily steppin’ up our game, and hope to make a stronger showing this time around. It’s great to see some of the people we have played with before back, and it’s exciting to see some new people here as well.

    Looks like we all have a lot of listening to do this time around. XD Soon this thing will be big enough to make a tourney bracket.

    This round we wrote ourselves a pirate shanty. We even actually did a bit of research into shanty structure. Harharhar. Hope you DIG it. Harharhar. Molemen out!

  6. Gorbzilla Says:

    Had a thought (after the Q&A session with Ken of course) about a charity Fu. What if we did a benefit round (my vote: fight against breast cancer) where everybody wrote a song for the benefit (could even be about the cause) and people could buy votes for a dollar with all the money going to the charity? That way the voting issue is no longer an issue. If someone wants to vote 100 times, let them donate that much! It could even be a separate round. I’m a genius!

  7. Bob Westfall Says:

    Thanks for the vote Cat, I was really sick when I wrote and recorded that, but I still had fun! Cheers to you and all the other Song Fu People!

  8. Jutze Says:

    As Edric wrote: This is so exciting that Song Fu is back up and running!

    If you’re interested, this link — http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnbEyeLAZOk — will take you to a page with lyrics and a no-budget video clip with Susanne and me acting molemanish.

    I already heard, Caleb’s (hooray for folk!), Edric’s (”The Sky?”!!) and Joe’s songs - the latter one being my favorite so far; infectious chorus and nice contrast with sweet melody, not so sweet verbs in between.

  9. Sara Parsons Says:

    As much as I love your song, Josh Holober-Ward, the little kid in my heart is calling out “Mokey’s a girl!!!” (But in all seriousness, you’ve got one of my votes.)

    Great round, everybody. Keep up the fu.

  10. Peter Says:


    Here is a video of myself making the song, lyrics included in the description.

  11. Jason Says:

    My website is jason-morris.net

    My lyrics (such as they are) are posted there if anyone is interested.
    Good job everyone.

  12. Prezbyter Says:

    What became of simmbiosis?

  13. BucketHat Bobby Says:

    There are two Bobs this time around, Mr Westfall, but it’s okay. She can be talking about both of us. Haha!

  14. tim Says:

    I liked Gorbezillas song but voted for him because he looks really, really sexy

  15. Russ Rogers (of Godz Poodlz) Says:

    #381. Cpt. Dane Frostline, (a dirtonaut who is haunted by what he’s seen)
    written by Godz Poodlz (Russ Rogers and Rhod Durre)

    Captain Dane Frostline thought the mission would be routine
    Captain Dane Frostline, he is haunted by what he’s seen

    Captain Dane Frostline the news reports tell
    Stepped into his capsule and bid us farewell
    Ground Control to Captain Dane, “Your drill spins right and true
    The message from Capt. Icecurtain, “The Great Toad be with you”

    Captan Dane Frostline, Stone Philips must know
    Just what might turn up when we dig deep below
    The Heretics lament, it is not the intent of the Great Century Toad
    For Mole-men to Dig Down this Deep on this Dirty, Deep Down, Dirt Road

    Captain Dane Frostline thought the mission would be routine
    And he’s haunted, he is haunted by what he’s seen
    Captain Dane Frostline there’s a ghost in your digging machine
    And he’s, he is haunted by what he’s seen

    Dig! Dig it! Dig! Dig it!

    Captain Dane! These signs are erratic
    There’s nothing but static
    Has there been a landslide?

    Ooooh! Please tell my mole-wife
    She’s been my whole life
    But I’m stepping outside

    Captain Dane! Luminescence is fading
    Your life sign’s degrading
    We can’t tell where you are!

    Ooooh! This doesn’t make sense
    Great Toad, it’s immense
    And it’s full of stars!

    Capt. Dane Frostline was thought dead and lost
    Declarationsts declare, “Science has a cost!”
    But seven weeks later, picked up by a merchant dirt freighter marine
    Was Captain Dane Frostline, a dirtonaut, haunted by what he has seen

    Captain Dane Frostline thought the mission would be routine
    And he’s haunted, he is haunted by what he has seen
    Captain Dane Frostline, his eyes have a distant sheen
    And he’s haunted, he is haunted by what he has seen
    Captain Dane Frostline, was it all just a crazy scheme
    And he’s haunted, he is haunted by what he’s seen
    Captain Dane Frostline, there’s a ghost in your digging machine
    And he’s haunted, he is haunted by what he has seen
    And he’s haunted, he is haunted by what he’s seen

  16. Berg Says:

    My top 5:

    Josh Holober-Ward - “#422 Mokey”- My VERY favorite!!! I love the Ben Folds Feel.

    Steve Chatterton - “#042 Miss Claudia Inward Burrowdown” Always a fan last Fu….this time’s no different.

    Jason Morris - “#019 Thomas Ashley Innersun” I love the slightly country feel to this, though i’m not a huge country fan.

    Jubilee Jews - “#487 Lady Antonia Oddpolyps” What can I say? Im a sucker for girls and ukuleles!!!

    Ian “Two Shades” Johnson - “#145 Mandibular-Jaw Johnny” Great story, very enjoyable tune.

    I enjoyed most of the songs this round….It was really hard to vote. Keep up the great work everyone!!!

  17. Justin Vega Says:

    Good job everyone. My song wasn’t up when voting started and you still can’t vote for it now that it is, but have a listen and tell me what you think.

  18. Justin Vega Says:

    Hey, nevermind, you can vote for it now, my bad. I cast my 5 votes :)

  19. Jessica Says:

    <3 CRAIG

  20. Shiona Says:

    Totally trying to vote for SargeantPepper from Youtube!!!! But can’t work out how… HELP

  21. Covenant Says:

    Hi All - To those who have voted so far! Thanks to all!
    Here’s the lyric for mine.


    Old Tom Furby was a very special man
    Of the Seven Hundred Molemen he’s the only one who can
    Take a sword, a bag and knotted string and make a cunning plan
    And go into the woods to kill the Fur—bies

    Kill them all! Kill them all!
    And banish them forever
    They are deadly they are evil
    They are hairy and they never
    Seem to pay for all their wickedness
    And that is his endeavour
    He’s going to torture maim and kill the furbies

    They creep around the woods at night
    And look for folks to hug
    And telling mole men “I Wuv Oo!”
    And other things that bug!
    They know no shame and cannot sing
    It doesn’t stop them trying
    So hurry dear old Tom and kill the furrr—bies


    So if you see old Tom around the place
    Then stop and say hello
    And if he’s feeling sociable, then with him you can go
    Then fur will fly and blood will spill
    As carving them up – oh-
    All the fun you’re going to have when killing furrrr—bies

    (sing twice)
    Kill them all! Kill them all!
    And banish them forever
    They are deadly they are evil
    They are hairy and they never
    Seem to pay for all their wickedness
    And that is our endeavour
    We’re going to torture maim and kill the furbies
    (last line x3 to end.)

  22. GoverningDynamics Says:

    As you might have noticed, my entry this round in an instrumental, due to several things conspiring to prevent me from recording vocals (or really writing lyrics). So there are no lyrics. But I hope everybody enjoys it somewhat nonetheless. I will probably get a vocals-added version up on my website sometime after voting is over for this round.

  23. BucketHatBobby Says:

    Well, since we’re all posting videos and whatnot, I made a video song for Mr Genuine Hissfurther which can be found at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjdE-V5uVOQ

  24. Hazen of Dead by Saturday Says:

    Great entries, all! So hard to pick just five. But I did anyway:

    1) Joe “Covenant” Lamb — So infectious and taps into our deep-seeded hatred of Furbies. Thank God for Molemen like Tom Furby.

    2) “Buckethat” Bobby Matheson — A wonderful balladeer spirit to this one. Also, a great deal of research went behind this one.

    3) Jason Morris — My eyes went wide with awe with this one. Someone during the listening party put “Loggins and Mole-ssina” and that captures the feel. Very beautiful entry.

    4) Caleb Hines — I don’t know what it is about the Renaissance thing that made me like it so much, but I did. Sort of added to the narrative he crafted.

    5) Governing Dynamics — Not only was it brave to do an instrumental, it was a bit trippy. Plenty of kudos for that alone. Any way you slice it, it was a good one.

    Honorable Mention:

    1) Godz Poodlz — Great use of Bowie imagery. Bravissimo.

    2) Edric Haleen — Your songs are always a riot to listen to. Also, a lot of research went into this one as well.

    3) Ian “Two Shades” Johnson — You had me clapping along. Sometimes, all you need is that little hook and you got one.

    Great work, all!

  25. davis family Says:


  26. riddle Says:

    hi folks. here’s my top five:
    5. Jason Morris “innersun” (somewhat precious but slyly subversive)
    4. Chas Lilly “openjaw” (don’t usually like the simple stuff, but this one stuck)
    3. Zer0guy “Dirtbag Dan” (if this was covered by Skynyrd, it would be a hit)
    2. Joe Lamb “Furby” (nuff said)
    and in the top spot…
    1. Gorbzilla “Nick Nolte” (which i’m surprised doesn’t have more votes)
    honorable’s to: Sara Parsons (the always pretty), Audiomohel (for sounding like the Doors), Godz Poodlz (needed more guitar and less alikeness to the original),and Timothy Rush (who is so close to his ‘breakout’ song, keep plugging dude)

  27. riddle Says:

    oh yeah, and Governing Dynamics. it was great and did suggest the Mole it was written for. but i gotta vote for the songwriters in a group as big and talented as this one.

  28. riddle Says:

    and, and Kylie Petto. make your pretty vocals more understandable and you could be a contender here!

  29. Rhod_Durre Says:

    I agree with with many others have said- this is overall a very strong group of songs. It wasn’t easy to pick my top 5 and I wish the best to all contenders. I’ll try to do a write up of the songs later, if I have time. It was a blast participating in the listening party last night!


    Good to see you! Glad you liked our GP song. I am in the process of re-mixing it (since it was recorded and mixed in a day) and was wondering if you could please elaborate on your comments. When you say “needs more guitar” do you mean that the volume of the guitar was too low, or that you wanted a more aggressive guitar tone? Also, when you say it needs to be less like the original, are you thinking of the middle “Dig!” part which sounds very “Space Oddity”? Is there something else about the tune that is too like another song?

    The reason I ask is that I’ve been thinking about cutting out that “dig” section- it’s my least favorite section of the tune and it is a little too close to the Bowie riff. However, the transition from 4/4 to 6/8 time seems to need something to bridge the parts. I guess I don’t know which original song you’re referring to and which parts of our song are too similar.

    Please be candid with your comments- I won’t be offended. I’m looking for any constructive criticism folks can offer. . . I’m still new to this mixing thing. Thanks!

  30. Gorbzilla Says:

    thanks riddle.
    anybody give any thought to the charity idea? I think it’s a good one!

  31. Jerry520 Says:

    I have to say #573, Sarah Parsons. You gotta love Sargeant Ketchup! :D

  32. Alon Says:

    I have one thing to say to Josh Holober-Ward: You’re a monster!! Poor Mokey. Great song, felt like Ben Folds meets Weird Al at the end … plus accordion solo! What’s not to like?

  33. brandi Says:

    I heart Josh Holober-Ward! Wow, what an amazingly sweet and terrifying concoction. I can’t get it out of my head.

  34. Berg Says:

    was it accordion solo? It totally sounded more like a melodica to me.

  35. beck poppins Says:


  36. Tommy G Says:

    Congrats to everyone - Good crop of songs in this Fu. I’m sad to tell you my own song about #287 Crazyant, wasn’t completed in time, but I think it best to spare you about his antics involving filicide and the Thanksgiving Mole Turkey.

    My first impressions… (and voted for *)

    Lady Antonia Oddpolyps No. 487.2 - Jubilee Jews
    “Now I am stuck here in this hole we have dug. Munchin’ on beetles and numerous bugs…” Ukulele and electric guitar bass counterpoint.
    Interesting lament. I liked the lyrics, but some of the verses sounded awkward. Singer nailed the anguish and forlorn of a person cheated on by her husband.

    #006 Sir Stinson Maggotwrangle - Timothy Rush
    ‘A Gentle Mole, with a gentle soul. A friend to both you and me”
    Solo Guitar. Ballad about a nice mole who has done himself well.
    The break into scat singing was a surprise, but fit the song well.

    #019 Thomas Ashley Innersun - Jason Morris *
    ‘Nobody milks a wet worm better than me, no way’…. Multi track 12 String Guitar, Drums, backing vocals. Good slow country ballad, great wordplay telling the life story of Thomas. Great production values that complement the song. Nice hook.

    #042 Miss Claudia Inward Burrowdown - Jarrett Heather
    ‘Chances are, you know her work if you lived underground’ Piano Ballad.
    Has a counterpoint verse feel to kick up the ironic humor a notch. Made me smile that she helped write the Declaration of Independence with only hisses and squeals.

    #042 Miss Claudia Inward Burrowdown - Steve Chatterton
    ‘While she composes verse, both concise and terse that you’ll never get to read or see’ Guitar, Drums, Backing Vocals. Upbeat Pop. Good use of details to push the story forward.

    #077 Dr. Hieronymous Sandpuppy - Justin Wolf
    ‘Yeah, I’m on my way. Passing Thru. Guess I’ll move on.’ Guitar Ballad. The good Doctor is misunderstood as he sells his miracle elixirs. Kinda a Jonathan Edwards vibe to it.

    #138 Sir Isaac Quickmud - Edric Haleen
    ‘Gravity is caused by the Sky pushing down on the earth’ Electric Harpsichord
    A class lesson in Molemen physics. Not quite a song, but a skit with dramatic accompaniment. Interesting take on the MM universe.

    #141 Devil Anse Doubledirt - Kylie Petto
    ‘Devil he went by name and massacring was his game- Doubledirt the Demon Hunter’ Guitar Filksong. An ode to the mole who hunted Demons near and far.
    I liked the passion in your voice, but the mic technique made it difficult to make out the lyrics.

    #145 Mandibular-Jaw Johnny - Ian Johnson
    ‘They pulled him out, there was no doubt that Johnny was a hero’ Piano Ballad.
    Johnny saves his classmates during a cave in, to the cheers of the populace.
    The ‘Johnny’ chant was surprising, and worked well to wrap the song.

    #153 Permanent Unsex - Lex Vader
    ‘If I can’t take you home, then I won’t take anyone.’ Techno dance
    Mole boy can’t get mole girl? Classic story. Doesn’t really mention moles though.
    Nice solo.

    #237 Dirtbag Dan - Zer0guy
    “Everybody know if you wanna be a man, you gotta pay a visit to Dirtbag Dan”
    Blues Guitar. Great instrumentation. Builds well.

    #275 Mr. Owen Daylight - Craig Richie
    ‘Owen Daylight’s never seen the sun’ Folk Guitar. Owen longs to see the surface, but finds out the hard truth. The grass is often greener where you’re not.

    #288 Polly The Exhumer - Governing Dynamics
    (No Vocals) Rock - Great instrumentation - but I think they wrong cut made it up on the download group….

    #297 Mr. Tom Furby - Joe ‘Covenant’ Lamb *
    ‘Oh the fun you’re going to have while killing Furbys!’ Irish Drinking Song
    Well done parody. Who wouldn’t want to dispatch a few of those?

    #298 Mr. Deadend - Spencer Sokol
    ‘If the going becomes too slow I can always come back home.’ Folk Guitar
    Mournful lyrics. Good guitar.

    #315 Mr. Dennimore Evercrouch - Peter Benedict
    ‘Covered in blood he left the scene, knowing he had prevailed
    Best mole man writer he may be, too bad that he’s in jail’ Guitar
    Good Lyrics. I liked the video.

    #381 Captain Dane Frostline - Godz Poodlz *
    ‘Captain Dane Frostline, there’s a ghost in your digging machine
And he’s haunted, he is haunted by what he has seen’ Pop.Twisted XTC style song with nods to David Bowie’s ‘Major Tom’. The hook kept me listening to the end. Good job.

    #414 Nick Nolte - Gorbzilla
    ‘Nick Nolte craved the limelight’ Pop. Fun ditty on Nick and his obsession to reach the surface. Liked the muted trumpet for the solo.

    #422 Mokey - Josh Holober-Ward *
    ‘It’s all thanks to Mokey the Moleman. It’s all thanks to him…’ Piano
    Such a happy, soulful tune. How quickly that changes. Listen this all the way through. Then vote for it. One of my favorites.

    #423 Red - Manticess
    ‘When I make it to the other side I will embrace the sunlight, and finally I will see roses of red’. Guitar. Picked up a ‘Heart’ vibe in this one. Good story.

    #429 Mr Roughfingers and his ‘Louse’-estra - Tyler Massey
    ‘Roughfingers, the Louse-stra plays for you….’ Guitar. A Moleman Troubadour and his lice, touring cave to cave. Has a little Greg Lake (ELP) feel to it. Good story.

    #567 Mr. Angelo Openjaw - Chas Lilly
    ‘Angelo Openjaw tells stories that aren’t true at all to impress the women that he meets.’ Guitar. Upbeat tune about a jerk of a Mole. Good tune and story.

    #573 Miss Miriam Poisonblisters - Sara Parsons *
    ‘Blisters don’t keep me from you…’ Piano. Happy song about pustules and unrequited love. Great instrumentation.

    #580 Old Man Hades - Gifted Gear
    ‘I want to go where the nights are quiet and play my violin.’ Acapella. Good story about a fallen angel who needs a vacation.

    #604 Suction-Cupped Jonny - The Jalapeno Jabaneros
    ‘He’s gone, gone, gone, gone to Davy Jones Locker. Pulled by a giant octopus that let him to his slaughter’ Acapella Sea Chanty. Good story. Sucks to be a moleman some days. Literally.

    #612 Mr. Barry Screwskull - Jonathan Mann
    ‘Don’t you know the time has come for leavin’?’ Folk Guitar. Dylenesque verses with a solid beat.

    #623 Jenna Frogtalker - Jeff Fardink
    ‘She’s an acolyte of the Toad’ Power Pop. Sometimes you can follow a little to closely to someone…. Good song, good hook.

    #023 Miss Annabelle Tunnelsmell - Bobby Westfall
    “When you put your glasses on, you stole my heart.” Guitar
    Gentle ballad on a smitten singer.

    #139 Mr. Genuine Hissfurther - “BucketHat” Bobby Matheson
    ‘That Awkward human kid was bound to break my moleman heart’ Guitar
    The Mentor and the kid named Jefferson. Good story. Good song.

    #471 Mr. Armskin - AudioMohel
    ‘The only Moleman living to escape the bonds of earth’ Blues Funky song on the flying moleman and the tribulations of his genetic heritage. Great solo.

    #490 Mr. Nehemiah Bloodwormer - Caleb Hines
    ‘Mr. Nehemiah Bloodwormer - Tamer of the Mongolian Deathworm’ Olde English Minstrel Song. Upbeat ditty on Nehemiah, and his exploits with the BloodWorms and lunch. Liked the end twist.

    #590 Mr. Harvey Rupert Elder - Aaron Z
    ‘His life would change forever… and at first he would not like it’.
    Slow Guitar Ballad on the return of Harvey to his origins.

    #604 Suction-Cupped Jonny - Alex Taylor
    ‘I wanna 3 way just like Pythagorus’ Guitar. Lusty Sea Tale about a Mole, an Octopus and the Deep Blue Sea.

    #666 Tommy Dickfish - Bram Tant
    ‘He has a dick like a fish’ …. who’s have thought it? Guitar

    Again, good job to everyone who participated. I’m impressed with the variety this Song Fu.

    Tommy G


  37. Ian Says:

    Voted for Morris, Poodlz, Chatterton, Sokol and Lamb in no particular order.

  38. Tyler Massey Says:

    Last place? Oh, dear. Must try harder.

  39. simmbiosis Says:

    As I didn’t return to the competition until after the competitors voted on each other, I thought I would share my lyric with you. Enjoy!

    Hydrostatic Charlie, a boneless mole-man and public nuisance (646)

    Hydrostatic Charlie @ Number 646

    In lower Molemansylvania

    Seems that no one comes around

    On the hoof or on the roof

    All these Molemen can’t be found

    The search for your average Molefolks

    Too often tends to confound

    Cause the Molemen hid their city

    Molemansyvania under ground

    Are you man or are you mole

    Underneath the grassy knoll

    A whole bunch of Molemen live there

    700 give or take

    Some of them are mean Mole women

    Some of them just bellyache

    Some of them are little Mole babies

    Mole milk for the thirsty slake

    Some of them are Molevangelists

    For also Molathustra sprache

    Are you man or are you mole

    Under-whelmed right up your hole

    Then there’s Hydrostatic Charlie

    As anti-social as they come

    He’s a filthy little dirt-bag

    From the dirt is where he’s from

    Charlie’s a nuisance with no sense

    Spineless, blind and deaf and dumb

    As a Moleman with no virtue

    To the dark side he’s succumb

    Are you man or are you mole

    Does corruption fill your soul

    He started out as a gofer

    For an underground concern

    Now a hydrostatic loafer

    Some Molemen never learn

    While growing up he was flowing

    Now he’s still as a cistern

    Ever owing never knowing

    How many more bridges he’ll burn

    Are you man or are you mole

    Are you morlock, badger, vole

    Weasel words life on the dole

    Gopher broke don’t pay the toll

    Kinda shrewd but never droll

    At best a pest out of control

    Burrow deep little armadildo

    Burrow deep into the mire

    Breaking bad wind in the willow

    More info than you require

    If you just sit there Charlie

    Will you suck us underground

    A bump on a frog

    Sucked into the bog

    Know why no one comes around

    Know why no one comes around

    Know why no one comes around

    Know why no one comes a, comes a, comes a, comes a….

    Are you man or are you mole

    Charlie you prick stay in your hole

  40. Spintown Says:

    I posted my picks, honorable mentions & all the related videos from the first round that I could find on my blog.


    Everyone did a great job, I can’t wait for round 2.

  41. Steve Chatterton Says:

    Thanks kindly for all the kind words & votes, and good work everybody.

    For those inclined to sing along, lyrics can be found either on my website:

    Or to the right of my super high-tech YouTube video:

    Mole Man artwork by Tricia Arnold:

  42. Kylie Petto Says:

    Thanks so much to everyone who’s voted for me, and thanks for all the comments. I do realize that my vocals weren’t very clear, and I’ll make sure to fix that in the future. Since they aren’t very understandable, here are my lyrics:

    I once knew of a demon hunter
    Fighting off predators asunder
    Devil he was by name
    And demon hunting was his game
    Doubledirt the demon hunter

    So far and few were his kinsmen
    And no one near could bear to like him
    So there he stood alone
    Fighting evil’s epitome
    Doubledirt the demon hunter

    Claws and fangs do sting at the veins
    As they make their precise incisions
    Evil’s bane does tremble at his name
    Fighting off the fear of oblivion

    Doubledirt hunted all the monsters
    Destroyed their bodies and their powers
    No creature left unslayed
    That threatened Devil Anse’s ways
    Doubledirt the demon hunter

    A man more tainted than by bruises
    Filled with internal contusions
    His mind in dreadful state
    He lost himself to his own fate
    Doubledirt the demon hunter

    Cruel intent can tear and circumvent
    What started as the purest of intentions
    How deceived the powerful can be
    Believing in their own bitter lies

    The corpses fell around his body
    Spattered in blood, gruesomely gaudy
    Devil he was by name
    And massacring was his game
    Doubledirt the demon hunter

    I once knew of a demon hunter
    Carried away by all his murder
    No mercy did he show
    And before long he came to know
    How the hunter becomes the hunted

  43. Tony Says:

    Simmbiosis, I love your song # 646 Hydrostatic Charlie, you definitely have my vote.

  44. BucketHatBobby Says:

    Tyler, don’t feel bad. Yours was great. Just because someone gets more votes, doesn’t make him/her a better musician.
    Now, this time around, everybody did very well, so you might think “Hey, maybe I’m not as good as these guys” but talent does not neccisarily dictate where you will end up on the list.

    The best thing to do is NOT WORRY about your position. I came in first place with a poorly recorded song before, and the next round, a song I was proud of did so poorly I was eliminated.
    That’s how these things work.
    Keep your chin up and people will notice you.

  45. peter ward Says:

    #422 — You do the mokey mokey Josh, and that’s what it’s all about. Great tune; great lyrics, great voice, and what, an accordian? skipper and GJ.

  46. Mr Id (EOC) Says:

    Does anybody else think Hydrostatic Charley is hilarious? Especially like all the guest vocals. Is that Nick Cave? Good job simmbiosis! And to all who participated.

  47. Darrell Maclaine Says:

    I am relieved not to be in this one thanks to the high number of competitors and the even higher level of quality (also it gives me no excuse to procrastinate about writing something for my actual album). There’s almost too many to even contemplate. But my favourites have been duly honoured. Great show all round.

  48. riddle Says:

    @rhod_durre: by “needs more guitar” i meant that the song with its constant vocal repetition (especially of the “cpt. dane frostline” line) needs the music to ramp up as the story progresses. it feels to me like you need some electric guitar to kick in after the verse about the Century Toad. this guitar could carry you into and through the bridge.
    as far as “too much like the original,” i was indeed referring to Space Oddity, but not simply in melody or structure, rather more in lyrical specifics and structure. the story is too the same to be surprising/fun. the first reference “stepped inside his capsule” was enough of a hint to make me smile, but thereafter, the constant similarity took away from the song, imo. i think the bridge is fine, even necessary, as long as the lyrical journey has its own compelling reason to exist other than being a mole-flavored copy of the original.

  49. Jutze Says:

    Here are my comments on all songs (in the order I listened to them), presented as is without warranties or guarantees of any kind. So please don’t turn into a zombie that eats my brain if I’m not instantly in love with your music. Thanks. (And yes, I’m well aware that many things I complain about are also a short-coming of my own music. Go figure.)

    NB: Unless otherwise mentioned I didn’t pay too much attention to the lyrics, because 1) I’m no native speaker and 2) listening to all songs back-to-back is already a bit exhausting. I’m not happy with this, but that’s life.

    Edric Haleen: The music (or rather the lack of ongoing musical accompaniment) are somewhat disappointing. Once I accepted the more scenic approach of this one, some parts stand out and make me smile. Kudoos for lyrics with formulas! The “The Sky?” shout still makes me laugh - but, as much as it hurts me - no vote this time around, despite the (as usual) strong voice. Sorry.

    Caleb Hines: Love the melody. The song could have used a bit more dynamics. The unity of music, lyrics, topic, and performance deserve my vote.

    Joe Covenant: My favorite Joe-song so far. I hate you for writing this song, though, because I first listened to it right before I went of to some Scottish and Irish Dancing - and then could hardly keep from chanting “Kill them all! Kill them all!” aloud in a socially not very acceptable way. I gladly saw the Creative Commons license on your bandcamp page and plan to 1) play (and who knows, maybe also record) the song myself and 2) ‘buy’ the song soon. Thumbs up for the Furby-slayer and, of course, my vote!

    Jarrett Heather: His previous entries were more upbeat, so this one has to struggle with my expectations.

    Josh Holober-Ward: Mature, suited for those moments were there’s not too much light, e.g., the middle ages, long winter nights. Is that a melodica? Very nice and welcome contrast to the (upcoming) Merry Christmas Carol madness. The ending is a bit too outgoing for my taste, eventually.

    Lex Vader: Hooray for 80s pop! Love it. And I’m only at 0:27 right now. :-) Please consider making a cheese videoclip with cheap animation effects. Love the part where it goes from major to minor in the bridge (?). Maybe add octaced vocals (one up) for sparkle, the next time. ;-) The song certainly takes the gloominess out of the whole mole men business; unlike most songs this feels more like “Dear topic, adjust to my music” and not like “Dear music, adapt to mole men-ness.” One wish, though: A shorter/more concise 7″-Radio-Mix would sound even more palatable to my ears… =-) (And no, I have no idea why I’m suddenly using emoticons like I was Joe Covenant.)

    Kylie Petto: Ah, pop, nice! But where are the badly programmed drums? The higher notes sound too Björk-ish for my (bad) taste. This entry is a good contrast to the male-nerds-who-can’t-sing-entries and I’m sure it will appeal to many folks. No vote from me, though, sorry. (The Lifehouse-ish IV-V progression sounds neat, anyway.)

    Tyler Massey: Is that reverb on your voice? Or were the vocals recorded in a cave? ;-) It certainly serves the undergroundishness. The whole thing is too lamenting for my taste. Still, the sparse instrumentation is well executed and the song works as a whole. The ending is a bit sudden, making me curious if there’s a lyrical reason for this.

    Zer0guy: Do you call this swamp-rock? Entries like this keep surprising me with their ‘organic’/good overall sound/production. Well done. The atmosphere of this one is good, too; the stand-out hookline (I’m a sucker for those) is absent, though. Positive surprise, anyway.

    Jonathan Mann: I failed to get the Mole Man-connection the first time around. The music’s just too fluffy and I just imagine a guy in Nashville with his western guitar in the spotlight.

    Jubilee Jews: The song seems a bit unsure where to go. As a result, I’m insecure on what to write about it. Less bass in the mix, the next time, maybe.

    Jeff Fardink: This needs a little time to get going. I’m not as tired of Autotune as many others, and it fits the occasion. Hadn’t Lex Vader nailed the synthie-pop-song this round, Jenna Frogtalker would be a stand-out track. (Maybe add some subtle 16th percussive thingy to keep the whole thing from becoming too monotonous.)

    Godz Poodlz: Points for using the mole name prominently. I think I spot a subtle Jeff Lynne-vibe here. I love how the duo-situation makes the music sound ‘wider’, more varied than all the solo artists around. Oh, and is it just me, or did R.E.M. help you recording the basic tracks? The ending drags along a bit too long (or with too few catastrophees, dramas, screams).

    Gorbzilla: The most mole-ish song so far. If the music was more dirty/raw/organic and the vocals a bit cleaner/phrased Tom Waits would have a new rival. I love the hypnotic qualities. Vote, not only but also because the music ‘overshone’ the somewhat prominent mole man name.

    Bram Tant: A good beginning, a gloomy atmosphere. Sadly, the song’s over before all this could settle in. Too bad you ran out of time to elaborate it all.

    Audiomohel: I love the music more with double-time feel (like Hubcap…). :-/ The band setting is a plus, also you managed to write and play the song to the point. Not too long, no unnecessary 23 verses. Nice guitar licks towards the end.

    Spencer Sokol: I like the approach and the way the vocals ‘hover’ above the guitar. A couple of chords in the middle-part seem a tad awkward. Still, I’m inclined to vote for this original new addition to the song fu family!

    Ian Johnson: A demo for the next Meat Loaf album? The vocals can’t support the ambitious composition and the “Johnny”-part towards the end seems to go nowhere for a while. There are several very good ideas in the song writing here, but the actual recording doesn’t live up to them. Maybe get an orchestra the next time around? ;-)

    Jason Morris: My recommendation: get rid of the drum track. Getting rid of the drum track is the best thing that can happen to 36% of all recorded songs. And yes, I consider myself a drummer, and no, there’s nothing wrong with your drums, it’s just that they ‘imprison’ the rest of the song structure. With this criticism shared, let me remark how much I felt reminded of Jonathan Coulton in the beginning. The song doesn’t sound like a copy or anything; it’s more the vibe and the possibility that JoCo might have gone for a rather ‘light’ song given the underworld-ish mole men topic. The result is a bit too harmless for me to receive an instant vote. But Thomas Ashley Innersun ranks in the top third, no doubt.

    Jalapeno Habaneros: Solid; a nice change to hear you a bit less jamming and more focused. I’d have liked a more melodic tune, though.

    Peter Benedict: Renaissance string picking meets punk rock vibe? Maybe you should consider getting drum tracks from Jason Morris - or pipes from Caleb Hines. Your vocals do work very will for the melodic punk rock edge. The overall arrangement sounds too loose for my taste, but there’s potential and a less mole-ish challenge will hopefully help to put it to use.

    Craig Richie: Nostalgic Fu I dare say. Half as good without the vocals on the border to madness at certain times. The climax after the spoken words part is too much for me, but I caught glimpses of the story, which I liked.

    Gifted Gear: Vocal rock’n'roll? Why, yes. Less is more. If I only had a few more votes to give. It does hurt to not vote for this great little tune. Maybe next time sing something like “Kill them all!” in the chorus. ;-)

    Sara Parsons: This is good. Just leave out the finger-snapping next time around. Great vocal performance and tasteful piano playing. If only the song was about a more emotional topic than mole men… vote for apparent talent!

    (I know, by now I’ve cast six votes - damn it; you’re all too good!)

    Timothy Rush: Sorry, I’m out of votes. ;-) Seriously, a surprisingly melodic tune. I envy native speakers/singers like you who they can throw in stuff like ‘yeah’ in a natural way. Could be produced into a streamlined pop song; the third verse with just drums and vocals. Not bad at all.

    Governing Dynamics: Mh, I’m half-way through and it’s more like a soundtrack, like you can read the credits while a vast graveyard comes into view in the first light of day. Polly can finally pack his stuff and head home for a good day’s sleep. The ending drags on too long. Three minutes would have sufficed. The lack of vocals make the tune interesting, yet from the challenge point of view less interesting than the rest.

    Aaron Z: More elaborate, more varied vocal lines, please. The whole song sounds bloody nice, yet totally harmless. The harmony vocals and the guitar picking are well done. The performance does the song justice. The sssss-part makes up for the dullness. A bit. Still, I’d prefer melodies that are more ’soaring’, emotionally charged. Song Fu is no place for shyness! (Or is it?)

    Buckethat Bobby Matheson: Yet another Nashville Mole Man. My favorite Buckethat-tune so far. I like how the vocal production allows even a dumb foreigner like me to follow the story. Not that I understand it all. But I like that, too, because imagination often enhances the music even more. The distinct refrain earns you additional points and it saddens me that I have no votes left. But please, keep up the good work!

    Alex Taylor: Bob Dylan’s guitar entered the contest, too? Unfortunately, this one doesn’t leave much traces in my memory.

    Chas Lilly: Contender for a Garden State II soundtrack, right?

    Steve Chatterton: I love fast-paced rhythms like this. You overdid the downward-spiralling vocal melody at one point; the overall impression is a good one, though. Kudoos for the well-placed half-time feel. After all the other songs this still makes Claudia stand out. ;-)

  50. rhod_Durre Says:


    Thanks for your answer. I can see where some additional instrumentation (like more aggressive guitar) could have helped move the song along. Indeed, our vision far exceeded the amount of time we had to write and record. . . I told Russ that he should be practicing his ‘hammer ons’ ; )

    I understand and appreciate what you’re saying about the similar theme, too. Although, there is a divergence in that Major Tom never makes it home while Frostline does in a sense- even if he’s never again the same. Honestly, the third verse was sort of thrown together in a hurry and I’m not really thrilled with the way that verse turned out. Maybe having a decent third verse would have helped. . . I am, though, pretty happy with the song as a whole.

    Thanks again for your input. Not sure how much of that I can address with the final mix, but having other opinions on my songs is invaluable in making them better in the future.

  51. simmbiosis Says:

    Thank you Tony and Mr Id (EOC) for your support. Guess it’s appropriate that for a mole song I started out in the hole. Your generosity and votes help me climb out. Thank you!

  52. Lex Vader Says:

    Thanks, Jutze. I was indeed considering a radio mix, but I figured since no one would hear the full version anywhere, this was the only place for it, and I didn’t want it to sound “edited.” I did fade it out before the 5 minute mark this time.

  53. Spencer Says:

    I must say that this has been quite interesting and you all are a great group of people. I’m glad to be a part of this.

    Jutze, thanks for the feedback. The reason the vocals ‘hover’ over the guitar is because I have no clue how to master a track. :D

    I’m now (im)patiently awaiting the next challenge!

  54. Dr. Cheryl Roberts Says:

    At least 50 of my friends have listened to Jeff Fardink’s song tonight and tried to vote for him. Only ONE could successfully vote…and the other vote cast went for Sara Parsons, whom they have no knowledge of–even though they clicked on Jeff Fardink.

    What is going on? This is egregious. Please contact me immediately. I’m for healthy competition, but this is sounding more like it is being held in Florida that on the Internet.

  55. Chas Lilly Says:

    HA! Jutze, I love that comment. Zach Braff, eat your heart out!

  56. Dr. Cheryl Roberts Says:

    I am not stupid–I have two Ph.D.s–but I can’t figure out how to vote. I have cleared my cache, kicked the dog, and cried injustice; but still nothing works–including no little box to click upon.

    What is the secret, so I can instruct my friends–all lawyers, doctors, CEOs, consultants, writers, and rocket scientists…and alas, they cannot find a way to cast a vote either

    Kevin will be furious about this–he is all about the little guy and propriety, not lies and scams and Nashaminy Hall politics…and I can get him entree to Marlee Matlin–he will NOT be happy!

    Yes, you caught me–a smart, uber-educated woman who loves SMODCAST…but can’t click in a vote?

    Please contact me about this flagrant violation of rights.

  57. Craig Richie Says:

    Thanks a lot, Jutze. The constructive criticism is really helpful. I’ve still got a lot of work to do as a song writer.

  58. BucketHatBobby Says:

    Mr Tommy G. I’m confused why you merely described mine as “guitar” when the bass and mandolin are so prominent.
    Just curious as to why.

  59. Peter Benedict Says:

    I just now finally got around to voting…sheesh.

    Anyway, I just kinda picked out any of the songs that stood out to me, and ended up with 8. Which I then ordered into the following.
    1.Jonathan Mann(far and away the best to me, I have no idea why this isn’t getting more love)
    2.Jason Morris
    3.Lex Vader
    4.Chas Lilly
    6.Ian “Two Shades” Johnson
    7.Steve Chatterton
    8.Jeff Fardink

    Good job to everyone. Thanks for the feedback.

  60. Dana Vollmer Says:

    Jason Morris FTW.

  61. anon. Says:

    Joe Covenant Lamb - “#297 Mr. Tom Furby. :)

  62. Wilson Fowlie Says:

    Edric: Just wanted to mention that I *love* the little sniffs you had your teacher character do. That’s a delightful touch.

  63. Edric Says:

    Thanks, Wilson!


  64. Josh HW Says:

    Hey everyone! First of all, thanks to everyone for the comments and votes and such! It’s really exciting just to be participating in this :)

    Now then, some of my favorites:
    Joe Covenant Lamb, #297 Mr. Tom Furby- This song just plain makes me smile. The Irish tune combined with your accent and the horrid furby noises make this work. The “kill them all, kill them all” bit gets stuck in my head from time to time too, hahah.

    Jason Morris, #019 Thomas Ashley Innersun- Something about this song is just… warm. It sounds very Jonathan Coulton-y, and yet original. The worm-milking lines make me smile too, and the production value’s great. A little short and simple, but good. The chorus to this gets stuck in my head, too.

    Manticess, #423 Red- Something about the rawness and simplicity made me choose this. I listened to this one a bunch of times. The story is interesting, especially without much to go on other than “Red”, and the melody is fun and catchy.

    Sara Parsons, #573 Miss Miriam Poisonblisters- Ahhh, what do I even say? Thoughtful lyrics, beautiful wandering melody, beautiful singing, lilting piano beneath it all… just very enjoyable and lovely overall. I was going to make a joke about the child in me saying “But Miriam’s a boy!!!”… but that doesn’t make sense :P hee hee

    Chas Lilly, #567 Mr. Angelo Openjaw- Had me crack a smile from the first line.. always a good sign. Your vocal delivery could be a little more confident, but frankly it fits the story. Clever lyrics, fun story, I especially loved him becoming “Angelo Brokenjaw”. Fun little melody as well, very enjoyable to listen to all the way through.

  65. mplsfixey Says:

    Bobby Westfall — #023 Miss Annabelle Tunnelsmell — here’s a songwriter. It’s midwest, intimate, melodic, simple … real nice. Deserves a few listens — you’ll see what I mean.

  66. Julie Elfin Says:

    Josh Holober-Ward - #275

    i really like the way it flows, and the ending is great

  67. mtgordon Says:

    Very odd. I seem to have voted already, but I don’t remember having done so. Maybe I accidentally voted while scrolling on my iPhone?

    I think I’ll try voting again for real from a different IP address. :-P

  68. Tommy G Says:

    BucketHatBobby - I think I said Guitar because of review fatigue… I listened to a the songs several times, and didn’t come across your video until later.

    I did think the bass was another track of guitar - but I do hear the prominent mandolin kicking in on the 1st chorus. Loved the story progression and use of Mole ‘lore’.

  69. Tommy G Says:

    Dr. Cheryl Roberts -

    Yeow! Flame off! It’s not a conspiracy to keep Jeff from getting votes (I did like his tune. Had a good hook and story)

    If all your friends are networked to the same node, or your IT has the building configured to the same proxy (Most likely), then only 1 person from your building would be able to vote. It’s based on unique IPs to limit abuse.

    Have them try to vote from home, and I bet you might have better luck.

  70. “Miss Claudia Inward Burrowdown” | Steve Chatterton Says:

    [...] a treat. The Masters of Song Fu challenge is back in full swing, and I’m in it with 30+ other [...]

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