Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

• A former American Idol participant, Jennifer Hudson, won the best supporting actress Oscar for her role in Dreamgirls. With the win, American Idol has overtaken another media, film, and will soon begin an assault on coffee production.

• In other awards news, Sharon Stone won the Razzie for Worst Actress of the year, for her role in Basic Instinct 2.  Stone’s vagina, which also appeared in the film, did not win an award.

• Universal Pictures has announced that a third Fockers film will be made. This news makes official the widely held belief that Robert De Niro has completely given up on acting as an art form and is now just in it for the cash and the chicks.

• Finally, and in continued Oscar news, Al Gore’s documentary film, An Inconvenient Truth, won the Oscar for Best Documentary. Despite Gore being announced the winner, George W. Bush accepted the award and promptly declared war on Bollywood.

That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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