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We here at FRED are true lovers of music, in all its forms. We’re also quite keen on the spirit of competition, and of spurring creativity through said competition.

To that end, we launched a unique form of creative combat.

In this age of manufactured and painfully earnest talent contests, we’ve decided to instead shine a light on the quirky, quixotic underworld of musicians that don’t get nearly the attention they deserve.

Ah, but I did mention that there was a competition involved…

Like a songwriting version of Iron Chef, the competitors will be presented with a very specific songwriting challenge. They’ll be given one week to complete their songs - however they see fit, within the parameters set forth - after which time the entries will be uploaded to FRED to be voted on by you, the audience.

At the end of the 3rd Challenge, the two Challengers with the most votes will face off, mano a mano for the title of…

MASTER OF SONG FU

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However, there may yet be one final challenge for this newly crowned Master - for they very well might (if the stars align and schedules permit) face off against one of the LEGENDARY MASTERS - artists like Jonathan Coulton, Paul & Storm, Neil Innes, Doc Hammer, & The RiffTones. Think of them as the iron chefs of Song Fu - one of which may or may not be revealed as your ultimate challenge. Only the wheel of uncertainty can predict (and even then, not).

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So what was the first Challenge?

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ROUND 1 CHALLENGE

Write a song that is about (or at least has key to the central narrative) RAIN (the meteorological phenomena). At some point (or throughout) the song, you must utilize an instrument (or vocals) that represent the rain. You are free to write your song in any style that you choose.

That’s it. The only other directive is that your song must run no shorter than 1 minute 30 seconds.

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And then our Challengers were given their Round 2 Challenge…

ROUND 2 CHALLENGE

Write a song that does not rhyme.

CLARIFICATION: Your song can be in any style, but must not contain any rhymes of 2 dissimilar words within a traditional verse structure. Exact repetition of a phrase or word is permitted. Your song must run no shorter than 1 minute 30 seconds..

If you want some inspiration, here’s a number song from The Muppets

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And then came the Round 3 Challenge…

ROUND 3 CHALLENGE

Write a song that involves a recipe for something.

This recipe can be for anything - not just food. Your song must run no shorter than 1 minute 30 seconds..

If you want some inspiration, here’s a recipe song by Queen Ida

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You’ll find the Round 3 songs (as well as those from Round 1 and Round 2) from each of our Challengers below, followed immediately by the Round 3 Voting Form! After voting ends on this round, the votes from all 3 Rounds will be tabulated and the TOP 2 VOTE-GETTERS will then go head-to-head in Round 4.

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THE CHALLENGERS

MIKE LOMBARDO

Mike Lombardo is a piano-playing geek-pop-rock singer-songwriter who likes to use hyphens when describing his occupation. He has been known to write songs about just about anything, including rocks and SAW 4. When not banging on a piano, Mike spends most of his time playing way too many video games or teaching small children how to bang on pianos. A graduate of Berklee College of Music, Mike is currently finishing up his second album with his piano rock band, the Mike Lombardo Trio.
Official Website: www.mikelombardomusic.com
Twitter: twitter.com/mikelombardo
ROUND 1 SONG:Sit And Watch The Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:I Found You

ROUND 3 SONG:We Don’t Have Any Eggs (from Man In Kitchen - The Musical)

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EDRIC HALEEN

songfu-edrichaleen.jpgEdric is a returning veteran of the Masters of Song Fu competition. He has been writing music (off and on) since the early nineties. He wrote and directed a musical, The Pushcart War, based on Jean Merrill’s wonderful novel. He has written and/or arranged a number of songs for various friends - some commissioned, some as surprises. He loves acting in community theatre, and is inspired by the music of Stephen Sondheim, Jason Robert Brown, Adam Guettel, Lynn Ahrens and Stephen Flaherty. Also - feel free to check out (and add to!) the “Happiness Board” on his web pages!

Official Website: happinessboard.com/Edric_Haleen.html

ROUND 1 SONG:In The Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:This Song Doesn’t Rhyme

ROUND 3 SONG:Robot Monkey 7.2

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GODZ POODLZ

Legends foretell of a mighty duo, born in the frozen North. Two neighbors and friends will unite to form “Godz Poodlz” and battle the Mazters or Song Fu for glory and bragging rights! Godz Poodlz are Rüss Rogers and Rod Durre. Russ Rogers was once a member of “Kit and Kaboodle” (still available on iTunes) and currently performs in “Rusty’s Rocking Jamboree!” Rhod Durre was in the Goth Rock Band, “Sear!” Beware the Godz Poodlz Ear Worm! Godz Poodlz songs are bright, funny and tenaciously catchy. Come join Godz Poodlz Legionz of Fanz!

Official Website: godzpoodlz.bandcamp.com

ROUND 1 SONG:Rain Is Pouring Down

ROUND 2 SONG:Blue Sky Thinking

ROUND 3 SONG:Godz Poodlz Jamz

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SPENCER SOKOL

Spencer is trying to do things. Music is one of those things. It is painfully obvious to him, if not others, that he has absolutely no idea what he’s doing. In the past he has been musically inclined with a guitar and occasionally with a piano. He is trying to be musically active once again, but this time he is attempting to do so while on the Internets. Creating music is a large part of his 40×40 list and he thinks this competition seems like “a Super Mega Happy Fun way” to rekindle his musical desires.
Official Website: www.spencersokol.com
Twitter: twitter.com/spencersokol
ROUND 1 SONG:Reservations

ROUND 2 SONG:Minus

ROUND 3 SONG:Wicked One

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KYLIE PETTO

My name is Kylie, and I’m your everyday 17-year-old girl with a passion for music. I’ve been writing my own songs since I was ten years old, and nothing is more fun for me than to sit down with my guitar and unwind. Now I thankfully have a violin to add to my arsenal, and I’m armed and ready for my second go at song fu!

Official Website: NONE
Twitter: twitter.com/KyliePetto

ROUND 1 SONG:Robby

ROUND 2 SONG:All These Knives

ROUND 3 SONG:Recipe For Disaster

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CALEB HINES

Caleb is a software engineer who pretends to be a musician on the internet. Self-taught in music theory, he is more comfortable writing a four-part instrumental fugue than he is writing a verse-chorus-bridge song. His favorite style of music went out of style at the end of the 18th century, but after discovering the likes of Weird Al, Dr. Horrible, and especially Jonathan Coulton, he realized that “omodern music” can be fun too. Now he is on a quest to update, expand, and diversify his musical knowledge and experience. In addition to singing, he plays a whole family of recorders, baroque flute, ukulele, melodica, pretends to play keyboard and guitar, and most recently, bass. He also uses virtual instruments because a real orchestra costs too much.

Official Website: refactoringmybrain.blogspot.com
Twitter: twitter.com/calebhines

ROUND 1 SONG:Water Cycle

ROUND 2 SONG:Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliaphobia

ROUND 3 SONG:Secret Recipe Ninja

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BOFFO YUX DUDES

The Boffo Yux Dudes began in the 80’s and 90’s doing radio comedy, and promptly fell asleep for the next 15 years. Tom Giarrosso and Allan Morgan (Pop Machine) continue the tradition of trying to recreate their lost youth with exceedingly torturous music, instead of spending the money on therapy like normal people having a midlife crisis. Tom blames Mike Lombardo for showing him the Fu way of doing things, and now he has to listen to the voices and write songs instead of doing his actual day job.
Official Website: www.boffoyux.com
Twitter: twitter.com/boffoyuxdudes
ROUND 1 SONG:Reign of the King

ROUND 2 SONG:Al’s Blues

ROUND 3 SONG:A Recipe For Love

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DENISE HUDSON

Denise Hudson is a musician of non-determined hair-color from Austin, Texas who is married to an musicaphile Australian. She hopes that she typed up her bio correctly (alas, she cannot spell!); and additionally hopes she amuses you, but she is done apologizing now. :) If she happens to make you slightly uncomfortable, she supposes there’s nothing to be done for it…
Official Website: denisehudson.bandcamp.com

Twitter: twitter.com/RangerDenni
ROUND 1 SONG:Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:Something Very Horrible (Bluebeard’s Lament)

ROUND 3 SONG:Duality Cupcake (’Why’)

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“BUCKETHAT” BOBBY MATHESON

songfu-buckethatbobby.jpgI’m “BucketHat” Bobby Matheson. I used to make cartoons for the internet, and sometimes still do, but mostly focus on my music right now. I write and record my songs solo, in my little make-shift studio, and when I play live, I often get some help from friends. Some of my music is funny, and some isn’t. More often than not, the humour is unintentional. My Influences range from Klezmer to folk, to punk and back again, which ends up sounding more like Zydeco than anything else (who’d have guessed?). I’ve been described as a “Cajun Buddy Holly” and an “Optimistic Elvis Costello”. It’s been said that I sound like “That guy from the Barenaked Ladies” and a “Nasaly Bob Dylan”. One of these days, I hope to have a description that is accurate.
Official Website: www.buckethatbobby.randomsociety.com
Twitter: twitter.com/BucketHatBobby
ROUND 1 SONG:Forget About The Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:I’m Fine (Could Be Worse)

ROUND 3 SONG:White Russian

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IAN “TWO SHADES” JOHNSON

Ian is a guitarist/singer/pianist/other-stuff-ist. He was a participant of Song-Fu #5, and is a member of Too Much Awesome. His songs have been described (by himself) as “probably not as funny as I think they are.”
Official Website: ianjohnson.bandcamp.com
ROUND 1 SONG:Downpour

ROUND 2 SONG:Two Words

ROUND 3 SONG:Friday Night

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GORBZILLA

songfu-gorbzilla.pngGorbzilla is a musician/band teacher in Mid-Michigan. He has been in a few bands over the years, most notably as the bass player/vocalist for the band “Satin Jones” and the guitarist/vocalist for the band “Jimmy Likes Pie”. The proud father of two future rock maniacs, Gorbzilla has been writing music for the past twenty years, and is currently working on his first musical Beer – Finally a Musical for Men based on the Haiku by Patrick “Horkmeister” Sweet entitled, “I Think I Threw Up”. He has been happily married for eight years, and is looking forward to this competition.
Official Website: gorbzilla.blogspot.com
ROUND 1 SONG:Freezing Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:A Song About This Song

ROUND 3 SONG:My American Dream

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GOVERNING DYNAMICS

Governing Dynamics is the name of Travis Norris’s eternal sideproject, where all the stuff written by him goes when his current band (whatever it may be) refuses to play it. The music has been favorably compared to such bands as Eels, Radiohead, The White Stripes, and other bands that cool people like. It has been unfavorably compared to the tactics used by the FBI against the Branch Dividians at Waco. If he has to describe his music by genre (and refer to himself in third person) Travis calls it “alternative/shoegazer with a liberal dose of Midwestern rock”.
Official Website: governingdynamics.bandcamp.com
Twitter: twitter.com/travisnorris
ROUND 1 SONG:Rain in Chicago

ROUND 2 SONG:Restrictions

ROUND 3 SONG:Broken Boy

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ZER0GUY

Two brothers from the midwest return to Song Fu with their brand of eclectic musical ideas. They don’t like to stick to a genre, and sometimes they suffer from swarms of bees.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/zer0guyband
ROUND 1 SONG:Thundercade

ROUND 2 SONG:Guitar Tonite

ROUND 3 SONG:Recipe For a Bad Man

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JUTZE SCHULT

Johannes “Jutze” Schult (from Germany) likes to live in a dream world where there has been no Grunge and where he is a talented singer. Sometimes his little folky pop songs find their way into the real world. Here they suffer from his hoarse voice and the do-it-yourself home recording production, struggling to appeal off and on beaten musical paths.
Official Website: www.jutze.com
Twitter: twitter.com/schult
ROUND 1 SONG:Kingdom Of Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:Communication Removal

ROUND 3 SONG:Schnitzel Soup and Vodka

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LEIGH & HOOVER

Dave & William have been writing songs together for decades, yet have still managed to avoid finding a clever name for themselves. William writes the words; Dave the music… which is good because it doesn’t really work the other way ’round.
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Official Website: www.cratchit.org/music
ROUND 1 SONG:Summer Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:We Do What We Do

ROUND 3 SONG:Primordial Soup (Traditional Recipe)

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COMMON LISP

Common Lisp is the name for the music projects of yours truly, Paul R. Potts, and any collaborators I may be able to drag into participating. I am a middle-aged software engineer with four children, some home recording gear, and too many guitars. I have never written an original song. It’s about time, don’t you think?
Official Website: commonlisp.bandcamp.com
Twitter: twitter.com/paulrpotts
ROUND 1 SONG:Polly Loves the Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:War Criminal

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GLEN RAPHAEL

Glen Raphael is a Manhattan-based software geek, circus performer, and guitarist/singer/songwriter who counts Jonathan Coulton and Paul & Storm as influences. He has recently written songs that featured killer robots, exploding pants, and the Statue of Liberty having a mid-life crisis. Though not all at once. Yet.
Official Website: youtube.com/glenra
ROUND 1 SONG:Can’t See The Sky

ROUND 2 SONG:Song That Doesn’t Rhyme

ROUND 3 SONG:Big In Japan

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INVERSE T. CLOWN

Inverse T. Clown is a jack of many entertainment trades, songwriting being one of his favorites. He has an album half-ready to be recorded, and is looking forward to garnering the patience to sit down and do it. Even more so, he’s looking forward to Song Fu 6. There is an ongoing series of internet covers of Inverse’s song “Today’s The Day” - and he loves them all - but it would nice to get some steam behind the endless REST of his genius, and Song Fu seems just the place to start it up. He’s funny, he’s clever, his music is synthetic, and he’s champing at the bit to throw everything he’s got to his clamoring fans. Stick around, and see why Salemites everywhere call this musical genius “The Future of Greatness”.
Official Website: toomuchawesome.ning.com/profile/InverseTClown
ROUND 1 SONG:Sexy In The Rain

ROUND 2 SONG:An Angry Rant

ROUND 3 SONG:Devastator

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JEFF MacDOUGALL

Coming in at twice Mike Lombardo’s age, Jeff MacDougall is back and ready to throw some Fu! When asked about the competition, he had this to say: “Yeah. That’s right. I’m back. *coughs* *mumbles*” This will be a Song Fu for the ages!
Official Website: www.jeffmacdougall.com
Twitter: twitter.com/jeffmacdougall
ROUND 1 SONG:Beautiful Day

ROUND 2 SONG:Ken Plume Is To Blame

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TARYN MILLER

Taryn Miller is an 18-year-old, gluten-intolerant, crazy-hat-wearing guitarist (and other stuff too, but she’s played guitar longest). She hails from Winfield, Kansas - Home of Bluegrass.
Official Website: myspace.com/chellenesuperstar
ROUND 1 SONG:Crowded And Clouded

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To download a ZIP FILE containing all of the ROUND 3 songs, CLICK HERE.

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To download a ZIP FILE containing all of the ROUND 2 songs, CLICK HERE.

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To download a ZIP FILE containing all of the ROUND 1 songs, CLICK HERE.

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ROUND 3 VOTING

And now, it’s time for the voting. For this round, you can choose your TOP 5 FAVORITE Challenger songs. Be sure to choose carefully. VOTING CLOSES AT 11:59pm EST on SATURDAY, MARCH 13th.

THE ROUND 4 CHALLENGERS AND CHALLENGE WILL BE REVEALED ON MONDAY, MARCH 15th.

If you are having trouble voting, CLEAR YOUR BROWSER’S CACHE and try again. PLEASE NOTE: This voting system bases voting eligibility on your IP Address. If there are other computers on a home or business network that share the same IP address through a router, it may say you’ve already voted. Unfortunately, there is no way around this, and still be able to prevent ballot stuffing. It’s just the nature of the online voting beast.

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ROUND 3 VOTING - THE CHALLENGERS

[poll id="26"]

View Results

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ROUND 2 VOTING RESULTS

[poll id="25"]

View Results

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ROUND 1 VOTING RESULTS

[poll id="24"]

View Results

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SHADOW ENTRIES

JOE “COVENANT” LAMB

I’m Joe Covenant. I’m Scottish. And never have enough time to do everything I wanna! Been singing and perfoming for over 40 years… (yes, I am 46.)… and I’ve nearly learned a 6th chord! Everything I do. I do for Song Fu. (If not for this ‘contest’ I would have never met and collaborated with so many talented people.)

Official Website: joecovenant.bandcamp.com
Twitter: twitter.com/JoeCovenant

ROUND 1 SHADOW SONG:Rain

ROUND 2 SHADOW SONG:The “Jay Is Awesome” Polka

ROUND 3 SHADOW SONG:Devil’s Fu Cake

BRAM TANT

songfu-bramtant.pngBram Tant is a Belgian coputer science student with a distinct love for music. Ever since going to music school as a kid, he’s enjoyed singing and playing the guitar, and has been writing songs for some years now. While he’s still learning to play the guitar, sing and write songs better, he improves with each attempt, and he makes up for it (and the lack of proper recording equipment) with his passion and enthusiasm. He would like to become a professional musician someday, but for now he’s satisfied with writing and performing for friends, family, and strangers on the internet.

Official Website: studwww.ugent.be/~btant/

Twitter: twitter.com/dantesxx

ROUND 3 SHADOW SONG:If You Take

If you triumph, not only will you win remarkable (and potentially off-putting) bragging rights and a clutch of fantastic mystery prizes, you will also become the proud owner of the magnificent, one-of-a-kind MASTER OF SONG FU TROPHY.

Good luck, and bring on the Fu.

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Comments:

26 Responses to “Masters Of Song Fu #6: Round 3 Voting Begins”

  1. Glen Raphael Says:

    My song “Big in Japan” has a music video on youtube here:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PALF607vPA

    Lyrics:
    You gotta be little
    Gotta be little and cute - cute is key!
    That’s in the recipe
    To make it big in Japan
    You’ve gotta have color
    You need some color - bright! - bright is key
    That’s in the recipe
    For big in Japan
    So we all like cute
    We don’t know what for
    And it’s all around
    You can see at the store that some like it more
    You gotta have style
    You need some style - flash! - flash is key
    It’s in the recipe
    For big in Japan
    Gotta have rhythm
    You need some rhythm - beat! - beat is key
    Beat’s in the recipe
    For big in Japan

  2. Governing Dynamics Says:

    LYRICISMS!

    “broken boy”

    you take a look at him across the room
    when just the right song is playing
    then speak some words to your friend
    just to make him wonder what you’re saying

    he could probably use a drink or two
    but that’s not really an absolute
    the post-modern man can destory himself
    with little more than time

    add a smile like you know a secret
    to send him out of his mind

    add in: desired time of give and take
    some sincerity (if you can’t fake)
    these are just instructions–
    no need worry anybody’ll judge

    twist into a shape you like
    depending on how much use you got from the original
    don’t need to worry
    he’ll always thank you when you’re done

    he’ll be shaking like a junkie
    and saying you’re the only one

    maybe it’s something that must be done
    but not something you should enjoy:
    you put this all together
    you’ve got yourself a broken boy

    you put this all together
    you’ve got yourself a broken boy

    you put this all together
    you’ve got yourself a broken boy

  3. Edric Haleen Says:

    I first stumbled across Masters of Song Fu in June of 2008, through Jonathan Coulton’s website — right when JoCo and P&S had been pitted against each other in the “write a song
    in the style of your opponent” challenge. At the time, I had seriously considered writing a “shadow song” in the style of JoCo.

    Never did.

    Fast forward to the present. This is the thirteenth song I’ve submitted for Masters of Song Fu. I thought I’d take this opportunity to go back, actually write up that idea (with a recipe thrown in for good measure), and pay tribute to the man who brought me here in the first place…

    For lyrics and more of the back story, you can visit my web pages, here: http://happinessboard.com/Robot_Monkey_7.2.html

    :-)

    Edric

  4. Inverse T. Clown Says:

    Figured I’d play the lyrics game:

    Devastator
    by
    Inverse T. Clown

    They are the Master Builders
    You can’t deny the skill
    They make such grand creation
    But they won’t hesitate to kill
    They have everything they need
    ‘Cause they take anything they want
    (You don’t often have to ask
    When you’re a member of the ‘Cons)

    Each one, alone, is baleful
    Each one can yellow up your spine
    But that terror can’t compare to
    The fright they build when they combine
    When they merge and work as one
    Now the monster is reborn
    You can witness for yourself
    How your fear can be transformed

    They add the Excavator
    To the Bulldozer
    To the Dump Truck, the Crane, The Cement Truck
    And the Payloader
    It’s a recipe for death
    It’s a blueprint for demise
    They add Bonecrusher
    To Mixmaster
    To Scavenger, Long Haul, Hook
    And Scrapper
    When the Devastator forms
    That’s when everybody dies

    He’s got a killer instinct
    He doesn’t take the time to feel
    There’s not an ounce of mercy
    Just 90 tons of rage and steel
    He’s not one to think things thru
    He’s just anger with a fist
    He’s a hundred feet of doom
    And he hates that you exist

    He won’t have satisfaction
    Until his enemies are crushed
    He’s their extermination
    They’d best prepare to bite the dust
    There simply is no fighting hope
    Against his adamant assault
    The best approach would be to run
    From this unstoppable Gestalt

    They add the Excavator
    To the Bulldozer
    To the Dump Truck, the Crane, The Cement Truck
    And the Payloader
    It’s a recipe for death
    It’s a blueprint for demise
    They add Bonecrusher
    To Mixmaster
    To Scavenger, Long Haul, Hook
    And Scrapper
    When the Devastator comes
    That’s when everybody dies

    Oregon to Cybertron
    All his foes have hell to pay
    I, for one, keep holding strong
    That he stomps on Michael Bay

    They add the Excavator
    To the Bulldozer
    To the Dump Truck, the Crane, The Cement Truck
    And the Payloader
    It’s a recipe for death
    It’s a blueprint for demise
    They add Bonecrusher
    To Mixmaster
    To Scavenger, Long Haul, Hook
    And Scrapper
    Where the Devastator stands
    That’s where everybody dies

    [Scrapper:
    The Constructicons form Devastator,
    The most powerful robot;
    WE should rule!]

  5. Dave Leigh Says:

    Lyrics for Primordial Soup:

    PRIMORDIAL SOUP
    ================
    From wherever we have come
    We may never know the truth
    Of what has taken place
    In a billion years

    (Of what has taken place - in a billion years)

    There must be some recipe
    To explain the mind of Man
    And not some accident
    Born from fallen rain

    (Not some accident - born from fallen rain)

    Separate the Chaos
    Into Day and Night
    Where once was only darkness
    Add a cup of morning light

    (Where there’s darkness - add some morning light)

    Raise a firmament above
    The dry land now below
    Call it Heaven

    (Call it Heaven)

    Raise a firmament above
    The dry land now below
    Call it Heaven

    (Call it Heaven)

    Gather waters of the deep
    Fill the cauldron, let it steep
    Stir it ’round and ’round
    Watch the world go ’round

    (Stir it ’round and ’round - watch the world go ’round)

    Light a spark within the broth
    Mull it gently, give it Breath
    Let it grow –

    Let it grow -

    [choral voices repeat on fade out]

  6. MiLo Says:

    No one seems to have picked up on the egregious plot hole in my song. This is good news.

  7. Zer0guy Says:

    Lyrics for “Recipe For a Bad Man”
    ————————————-
    One big bag of severed thumbs,
    A collection of empty eye sockets,
    Fifteen tons of dirty guns
    And whatever’s in your pockets.

    Cleanin’ out your pockets makes me feel like a dangerous Dan.
    I’m a bad man.

    You may find that you’ll wind up all alone.
    (Recipe for a bad man x2)
    Cuz a bad man never calls you on the phone.

    A pound of pity, and a pint of shame,
    Mix with an old discarded love note.
    Heat it over an old flame.
    Heat until your heart explodes.

    When your heart exploded I started livin’ in my van.
    I’m a bad man.

    You may find that you’ll miss me later on.
    (Recipe for a bad man x2)
    But girl, you’re out of luck, cuz when a bad man’s gone he’s gone.

    (Vanilla rap)
    I’m a bad man.
    I spit rhymes like a mad man.
    Don’t confuse me with Bruce Wayne or the Batman.
    When I walk around and my neighbors say “hi,”
    I don’t even look. I just walk right by.
    I don’t get high, but I’ll shoot you in the eye.
    Got my rubber-band gun all pumped and primed.
    And if you ever say you wanna take it outside,
    I’m gonna call the police and probably hide.
    You’re an Avon salesman come to call?
    I slam the door shut before I even look at y’all.
    I got balls. Gonna spray paint on your walls this fall
    At the mall kickin’ doors off the stalls.
    On the bad scale, one to ten, I’m like an eight.
    Sometimes I fast-forward tapes and take ‘em back late.
    But if you ever spurn me girl, I’m gonna cry.
    Wait for you in your house and shoot you in the eye.

    You may find that I come back as meek as a mouse.
    (Recipe for a bad man x2)
    I’m still a bad man, but all my stuff is in your house.

    ooh!
    ————————————

    So this song ended up being sort of a tribute to Michael Jackson. I know that may seem trite now, but it wasn’t intentional. We miss you Mike!

  8. Dave Leigh Says:

    Mike, whether you’re talking about the fact of a guy who can’t make toast taking the day off to bake a cake with a recipe for chocolate-chip cookies; or the fact that you switch topics in the middle to sing about the challenge rather than the eggs… I for one am of the opinion that the song is catchy and cool and the facts can go hang themselves.

  9. Johannes Schult » Blog Archive » Schnitzel Soup and Vodka Says:

    [...] Download and vote over at FRED Here is a secret that I’m going to share with you The perfect meal to eat before you’re getting drunk This recipe comes straight from the heart of Mother Russia It keeps any hangover away You need some schnitzel soup and 17 potatoes The soup is easy – just get a lot of meat Then put it in a pot and add a little water Boil it for a while until it’s through When it’s Vodka, vodka – early in the evening Vodka, vodka – early in the night Vodka, vodka – early in the evening Vodka, vodka – early in the night If you like it sweet you add some apfelstrudel And if you’re hungry you should a chunk of cheese And when the soup is boiling you add a few more items Paprika, tomatoes, sauerkraut and beans You have to eat a lot for the soup to be effective Five full plates at least When it’s Vodka, vodka – early in the evening Vodka, vodka – early in the night Vodka, vodka – early in the evening Vodka, vodka – drinking all day and night Vodka! Vodka, vodka – early in the evening Vodka, vodka – early in the night Vodka, vodka – early in the morning Vodka, vodka – drinking all day and night(words and music by Johannes Schult) Category: Music  |  Comment (RSS)  |  Trackback Tags: humppa, jutze, polka, recipe, schnitzel, solo song, song fu, soup, vodka [...]

  10. Boffo Yux Dudes Says:

    In case you couldn’t tell, the recipe for love at hand is employed by one Dr. Frankenstein, who’s putting together his ideal woman…literally. And yes, the style is Boy Band, which lead us to refer to the song informally as “FrankNsync.” - Tom, Allan and Scott

    “A Recipe for Love”
    by Boffo Yux Dudes

    How can I make you understand?
    Our love follows a master plan
    From stories told by girl and beau
    In days of romance long ago

    To find you I looked near and far
    In cemeteries and graveyards
    My shovel worked from coast to coast
    Cause you’re the girl I dig the most

    Then I brought you to my lab
    Where I put you on the slab
    You came around at 12 o’clock
    It must have come as quite

    A piece from here, a part from there
    A little bit from who knows where
    A little power from above
    That’s my recipe for love

    A romance just like ours, my dear
    Cannot start ‘til I holler “Clear”!
    I don’t mean to give you jolts
    But here comes 50,000 volts

    When I first saw you I took your hand
    And legs, spleen, and pineal gland
    I stitched them up with a cross hatch
    Until you had no strings attached

    You’ve got a heart that’s never blue
    And fantastic kidneys too
    Is it divine insripration?
    Or just superior circulation?

    A piece from here….

    I don’t want to be facetious
    While I watch you go to pieces
    I know darling you’ll be mine
    Or my name isn’t…(Frankenstein)

    [RAP]

    Your veins I see coursing with life
    And know that you must be my wife
    So walk with me into the light
    And never ever leave my sight

    I hope you’re equally as smitten
    If love bites, I know I’ve been bitten
    The final chapter of our story
    In our underground laboratory

    [BREAKDOWN (Nervous)]

    A piece from here…

    How can I make you understand?…

  11. Russ Rogers (of Godz Poodlz) Says:

    Lyrics for Godz Poodlz Jamz
    written by Rhod Durre and Russ Rogers

    Boil 6 cups of Poodlz Juiz in a medium saucepan
    Stir in some Funky B3 Organ and bring it to a boil again
    Let it simmer and sizzle to the tempo you desire
    Pop it! Whip it! Beat it! Then jump into the fire! (Oh yeah, oh yeah!)
    Drop in some doggy drippings, straight from the canz
    We’re cookin’ up a little bit of Godz Poodlz Jamz!

    (Godz Pooldz Jamz, all right!)

    Take 4 tablespoonz of moxi, add a dash of self effacement (Oh yeah)
    Slather on some Autotune from the computer in the basement (Oh yeah)
    A truck load of groupies caramelized with tabloid rumor
    Shredded guitar cooked under pressure with some humor (Oh yeah, oh yeah)
    Stew in savory suggestionz from our legionz of fanz
    We’re cookin’ up a little bit of Godz Poodlz Jamz

    Godz Poodlz Jamz, Godz Poodlz Jamz
    Hey Mr. DJ, spread this jelly on the dance floor!
    (That’s right, spread it all around. Yeah.)

    [Break Down]

    (That’s right, I agree with him)

    You know you’re going to want to join our legionz of fanz
    We’re cookin’ up a little bit of Godz Poodlz Jamz

    You know you’re going to want to join our legionz of fanz (all right!)
    We’re cookin’ up a little bit of Godz Poodlz Jamz
    We’re cookin’ up a little bit of Godz Poodlz Jamz
    We’re cookin’ up a little bit of Godz Poodlz Jamz

    You can get Godz Poodlz Tunez at http://godzpoodlz.bandcamp.com

    And you know you’re going to want to join our legionz of fanz! (all right!)

    On twitter: http://twitter.com/GodzPoodlz

    MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/godzpoodlz

    Where we get many savory suggestions!
    facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Godz-Poodlz/151736822018

  12. JoAnn Says:

    Mike L-You are really a younger clone of Edric, aren’t you. This made me laugh; the last bit of it with 2 voices I couldn’t quite make out the words.
    Edric- Channel JoCo much? Boxes of limbs, lol, another mad scientist in love- this fits so well with Skullcrusher and Live, it would make the perfect third to the Spiff vids about the Skullcrusher doc. <3 this song- marry me! Wait, I’m already married…oh well.
    Spencer- very nice, good levels of expressed emotion without turning emo bleh, I liked it.
    Kylie- great multi part layering of voice and instruments, looks like you have been polishing your mixing skills
    Caleb- love your woodwind playing, back up singer(s) add a nice layer to the whole. I think I will avoid midnight snacks for a while though.
    Boffo dudes- love the 3 part harmonies and you being the second person/group to channel JoCo :o), “till I holler clear” had me laugh aloud.
    Denise- good piano- anyone ever tell you that you sound a lot like the girl who sings “I want to go ow-ooot tonight” from Rent?
    Jutze- we need more drunken russian polkas around here, yay!
    Leigh & co- wonderful. Nuff said.
    Glen- I liked it enough to vote for, dunno what in particular, just plain liked it. Was that a real koto I heard at one point? Maybe it is my love of Japanese culture and art and anime.

  13. Paul R. Potts Says:

    There are a lot of great songs this round, but one I just wanted to single out: Johannes, I just wanted to say that your song this time is absolutely hilarious and I love it! It reminds me of the polka music my Polish stepfather used to play when I was growing up — polkas about schnapps and things like that.

  14. Spintown Says:

    I posted my “review” over on my blog. Good round, and I voted for 2 people I know I’ve never voted for in the past. Almost made it 3 people I’d never voted for…

    http://spintown79.blogspot.com/2010/03/song-fu-6-round-3-review.html

  15. Denise Hudson Says:

    ‘Duality Cupcake (”Why”)’

    My week has not been fine
    There’s no rules for how to write me life
    Stick to facts, go back to practice
    … still all this distraction;

    lies in wait to glaze me-make me crazy
    although no mistakes are made -
    so who’s to say?

    It’s morning / it’s nighttime
    -a cup of do-or-die
    -flask of hello/goodbye
    -a tablespoon of
    why shouldn’t I?

    As for him and I -
    we’re fine
    and I think we might be tied up tight enough to get by …
    but who’s complaining - what’s underneath my frosting’s not really what’s advertized

    Why shouldn’t I
    add the spice / a cup of do-or-die
    a dash of hello-goodbye
    Why-not-why
    … shouldn’t I?

    Why shouldn’t I
    add some spice
    a cup of do-or-die
    just tell me why
    -try to make something from a recipe
    out of this thing

    Why shouldn’t I?
    -mixed up like marmalade inside
    while I try to hide myself in plain sight
    it’s sticky in my mind
    the complictations: clinging singing circles and I close my eyes
    and it stays…
    my duality

  16. Denise Hudson Says:

    NOTE: in my first stanza, it’s “write MY life” and not “write ME life.” Sheesh. Spelling in the middle of the night. Alas …

    (you know … since it’s not a pirate who is singing the song. We’ve already got cookie stealing ninjas in this round, Caleb ;) yay!)

  17. Zer0guy Says:

    Well we had a lot of fun with Song-Fu this time around, but i don’t think we’ll be in the next one. I know, “yay!” right? I just wanted to say that we were never in this to win anything. We were in it for the challenge and the fun. Maybe we’ll join TMA and get some actual votes next time ;^). Thanks to everyone! Great job people!

  18. Denise Hudson Says:

    I enjoyed your work guys. A lot a lot :)

  19. Jason Morris Says:

    I must say, I do not understand why Zer0Guy is so under-represented in the voting.
    Their songs are weird, yeah.
    But they can play in time, which gives them a leg up on a lot of folks.
    They have a great deal of range in their style of music as well.
    Overall, I find their music to be creative and interesting.

    I believe they are excellent musicians, who I expect will develop into fully-fledged musical ass-kickers in a few more years.

    So yeah.
    I think that’s the only time I have had much to say about anyone in SongFu.

  20. Boffo Yux Dudes Says:

    Zer0guy -

    I liked the way ‘Recipe for a Bad Man’ came out. I wouldn’t get frustrated. It’s all a process. The voting, while a fun distraction, misses the point for at least my reason for being in the Fu. It helps give Al and I structure to actually finish some product, instead of tinkering with things forever. It also has allowed me to meet several dozen new friends can colleagues who know what it’s like to create and produce songs. That’s pretty cool. It would be disappointing if you stop participating because of a lack of votes.

    Bottom line. There are now 5 songs out there that would not exist that we created as a direct result of Song Fu. Now, the quality of them can be up for debate, but I’m pretty happy with the final product. I still want to tweak each one, but I’m learning to let it go and move on to the next project.

    This one was a tough Fu to vote - lots of great candidates. I’m on my 3rd cycle through listening, and have some favorites, but there’s a good 10 that could get a vote. I’ll give it another listen and have to pick tonight…

    Tom

  21. Zer0guy Says:

    Wow. What a response!
    I know I shouldn’t focus on the voting, but last time Jon focused on the voting and got discouraged, so it was my (Dan’s) turn to be discouraged. I appreciate the support, Denise, Jason and Dudes inclusive. It made me feel a little better about our standing. We’ve been writing and recording for years now, but the Fu has really gotten us to seriously knuckle down.
    We still probably won’t be in the next iteration, but that’s more because we wanna finish the three albums we’ve been working on and Song-Fu kinda gets in the way. I’m sure we’ll be back though! Keep on a-rockin’

  22. Angelastic Says:

    I liked ‘Secret Recipe Ninja’ (among others) but I was a little disappointed by the chicken legs… for some reason I was expecting it to be:

    He might take all your sugar.
    Maybe he will steal your eggs.
    He’ll get in your freezer
    and remove your severed heads.

    Of course, ‘remove your chicken legs’ actually rhymes and makes sense, so I can certainly understand why it’s there instead of severed heads. It just surprised me the first time I listened.

  23. Inverse T. Clown Says:

    Godspeed, Zer0guy.

  24. GoverningDynamics Says:

    Zer0Guy - Just wanted to say I very much enjoyed your work during SF5, even if I gave you some s on the Spintown blog about Thundercade’s lack of lyrics (which was funny because “Guitar Tonite” might as well have been an Artist’s Response to that criticism). When people leave SF because they’re frustrated, that’s bad. When people leave because they have other musical projects that need their time and focus I think that’s great…. So I’m gonna believe you’re taking off mostly to finish albums, if that’s all right. :)

  25. GoverningDynamics Says:

    SF6, that is. Man, I’m tired.

  26. Spintown Says:

    @Zer0guy: I don’t think any body has given you more crap then me. Since you’ve put lyrics in your last 2 entries I’ve started to look forward to your songs. Enjoyed the last one a lot…except for that effect mentioned on the blog.

    I’ve voted for a few people that I’ve never voted for in this Fu. You were well on your way to possibly getting votes from me.

    PS: Joining TMA is a good idea…not for votes…but because it rocks.

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