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By Christopher Stipp

Archives? Right Here…

Instead of manning-up and actually going the emotionally hard route of being outrightly rejected by publishers, I’m rejecting them first and allowing you to give my entire book a preview, let you read the whole thing or, if you like, download the whole damn thing at no cost. Download and read my first book “Thank You, Goodnight” for FREE.

Before I let you animals loose to do what animals do during their Christmas break I’d like to share a recipe for some alcoholic delight this holiday season.

It’s called the Oatmeal Cookie and it is, perhaps, one of the most satisfying aperitifs you could ever toss down your gullet as you navigate your way through treacherous social graces. It’s simple enough to shake up but it’s wonderfully dangerous and delicious:

2 shots butterscotch schnapps

2 shots Bailey’s

1 shot Goldschlager

Stick all three ingredients into a tumbler with ice and shake. Add a spritz of Coke and serve. – Special Thanks to Trafton Nicholls for the recipe

Yummy and lethal. Be sure it’s represented at all your holiday shindigs. You’ll be thanking me as your stomach feels the warm goodness of a drink that’s akin to wrapping your insides with a fuzzy sweater.

Now, as we wrap up the year that was 2007 for trailers it is time to look back and see who managed to actually create something out of nothing and tease us all while doing it. This was a year where I saw more of the same being passed off as exciting fare but if you are any kind of reader of this column you should know that this is really a matter of the studio’s needing to impress us, to entertain us, to dance, monkey.

Trailers have become such an integral part of how a movie gets marketed and released (por ejemplo: How many of you there were all sorts of excited after figuring out that the newest DARK KNIGHT trailer debuted last Sunday night? Yeah, this is how much power they wield) but there still is a vacuum needing to be filled about how well the companies out there are doing their jobs right. I like to let the world know when there’s a trailer people should be watching and appreciating for its intimate goodness but there’s only so much I can do. Not to mention difficult when people ask what I do for this site. Sure, it may sound all hip and cool to drop that you review movie trailers while trying to infuse pithy remarks here and there but it’s hard to do it with a straight face when in the presence of a complete stranger.

It doesn’t exactly bring boys to the yard, if you catch the drift.

However, that hasn’t stopped me from doing this thing week after week and year after year (more on that in the coming weeks) and the Greatest 2007 Trailer Awards countdown is no different than any other needless, disposable countdown list that you’re no doubt seeing all over the place. So, without anymore hesitation here are my picks for the best of ’07. I’m counting down 10-6 this week, stay tuned for the rest in seven days:

10. THE LIVES OF OTHERS: Where else has reading been so engaging? It’s just a tough sell when you have a foreign language film you’re trying to get people to see but we’re so isolationist here in the States that when we see words pop on the screen we’re all but debilitated in ways that Kryponite can’t even hope of doing. You have a mixture here, though, of pure drama and the thin sense of real foreboding. The trailer succeeds where others failed because it doesn’t sell its genuinely engaging story; it takes the next step of playing into what makes us all human and what can happen when our humanity becomes the very thing that is the object of someone’s interest. Creepy and highly effective.

9. RENO 911: MIAMI: Brilliant. I wasn’t bullshitting the boys of RENO when I said on camera during my interview with Thomas Lennon and Robert Ben Garant when I said that RENO 911: MIAMI was one of the only movies I actually watched more than once this year. The reason that I was brought to the trough of this film’s offerings was its highly amusing and creative trailer. It doesn’t try to hook us with a pop soundtrack that would try and mask the funk of shit comedy like others tried to do this year. This trailer gets by on its own strength and its the opening sequence that not only sets the tone but its everything that comes out of Deputy Junior’s mouth and body that hooked me clean. Walking into doors, getting tazered bro’ by some minx and even the cars peeling out of the garage only to ram into one another was just a peek at what was one of the best ads for a good time at the movies this year.

8. LITTLE CHILDREN: You can have FATAL ATTRACTION. You can keep that film and boil it if it means that this movie could take its psychological place as a reason why you should never, ever cheat on your lady. This trailer is sparse but that’s the real treat. The train chugging in the background with a heavy dependence on mood evokes the exact kind of emotion that you’re going to feel throughout this film. It sells itself without ever having to pitch itself if that makes any sense at all. The audio of the train careening by as we build up to what should be obvious to anyone with any sense at all, that there is no way anyone is going to get out of this unscathed like the train that will demolish anything in its path, is not only palatable but it reaffirmed my notion that you should never, ever cheat on your lady. She’ll cut your balls off. I have come back to this trailer many times this year if only to try and understand that quiet greatness of this trailer’s power.

7. TRADE: See this movie? No? Don’t worry, I didn’t either and, from the looks of it, not a lot of other people did. One of the best things about reviewing movie trailers is that I can basically say whatever I want without having to ever see the film to see if I’m right. Usually I have a pretty good barometer for what really stinks and what should have a decent chance of surviving but I can’t place this film in any sort of those boxes. The story seemed to spring from a rather interesting place and its premise doesn’t strike me, and still doesn’t, that would appeal to a lot of people across a wide swath. That’s irrelevant, though, as this trailer showed how you can have a good premise, explain yourself with a little bit of exposition and leave me wanting more with a great back beat. “Agnus Dei” by Rufus Wainright is one of the superlative uses of music that ever was this year. The trailer tugs at you while demanding you keep up with the story.

6. DAY NIGHT DAY NIGHT: For anyone who wants to talk about trailers always giving away too much of a film I’d like to introduce you to this trailer. Without so much of a scrap of background or context we’re given nothing to base any reason why we should go out and spend money to see this movie but it does not matter in the slightest. This trailer is eerie in ways that I can’t explain but I will say that it’s use of a voiceover is actually well-used and understated to the point of us feeling like interlopers into a moment we feel compelled to try and stop. We don’t know why we feel like something is going to happen, and it’s going to be bad, but the trailer takes the chance to not say anything one way or the other. It’s wonderfully daring and evocative. I can’t stand watching this trailer and not feeling a sense of unease. Mission accomplished in every sense of the word.

IN BRUGES (2008)

Director: Martin McDonagh Cast: Brendan Gleeson, Ralph Fiennes, Colin Farrell Release: February 8, 2008 Synopsis: IN BRUGES is the darkly comedic tale of the fates of hit men Ray (Farrell)and Ken (Gleeson). After a difficult job in London, the team is ordered by their boss Harry (Fiennes) to cool their heels in Bruges. Very much out of their comfort zones, the men find themselves drawn into increasingly dangerous entanglements with locals, tourists, and a film shoot. Soon, their perspectives on life and death are violently skewed.

View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)

Prognosis: Positive. I have great affinity for this trailer for a couple of reasons.

One, I think we finally are given Colin Farrell in his natural habitat. You watch this thing and wonder what the hell happened with S.W.A.T., ALEXANDER, DAREDEVIL but then remember why MIAMI VICE and INTERMISSION were good examples of what he’s able to do. The guy has something but it just hasn’t blossomed in ways that some pretty boys turn that acting corner like Brad Pitt showed he could do after FIGHT CLUB and 12 MONKEYS.

Two, anyone who can use the word “retarded” and make it sound funny has got my vote.

I appreciate the way this trailer begins with a flash. There isn’t a quick cut or a thumping beat to make me feel like I’ve stepped into an MTV video for the movie. This trailer begins with a quite benign back and forth with a priest and Colin. It seems innocuous enough until Colin pops him.

Interesting.

The trailer slides easily into putting everything into context. In does it so well that by the time that Colin unleashes his comedic artistry it’s a wonder why there hasn’t been more said about why the It’s a Small World ride at Disneyland had to be “adjusted” due to the increasing weight of people (I’ll go on the record and say it’s mostly Americans). Colin glides right through this thing. Equal parts violent, amusing.

The whole idea of the film, that Colin has to wait two weeks in Belgium with his fellow hit man and await instructions of what to do, is so basic that it begs an answer as to why someone thought it was ripe for comedy.

Big-ups, huge praise, needs to be heaped on the narrative voice-over with regard to the letter that Colin reads from the big boss wondering where the two of them are (a case of cabin fever obviously set in and they wanted to take in some sights, insult the locals, that sort of thing) in a bleeped manner that I have never heard before during a narrative. It just made me appreciate the creativity.

What’s more is that when Ralph Fiennes enters the picture he just adds to what amounts to a true madcap adventure. The cat and mouse shootout that ensues is enough to make you wonder whether this is a comedy or an action/comedy or an action/comedy/adventure or something else entirely.

I would usually loathe the expression “And what’s more…” but I am going to employ it here to sum up what makes this film look like a real treat if, for nothing more than to hear Colin, in his Irish lip, talk about Bruges: “If I had grown up on a farm…and was retarded…Bruges might impress me. But I didn’t so it doesn’t”. The lilt in his voice is what really makes the dialogue snappy.

And, one more thing: Jordan Prentice. I know a lot of you didn’t get a chance to see one of my favorite independent movies of 2007, WEIRDSVILLE, he played a mall cop with a thirst for medieval vengeance but he plays the part of a man in this trailer that not only has an amusing quip about where to find a prostitute in Bruges but then becomes a hilarious punch line, literally, when he gets a karate chop to his neck.

I need to see this movie; I just hope to God all the best parts weren’t employed in the making of the trailer.

Comments: 2 Comments

2 Responses to “Trailer Park: Best of 2007 Part 1”

  1. Nicholas Tabarrok Says:

    Hey CHristopher

    Thanks for the nice plug for WEIRDSVILLE, it was nice to see. I wish more people did indeed get a chance to watch it.

    Cheers

    Nicholas Tabarrok

  2. Stipp Says:

    Nicholas,

    WEIRDSVILLE had everything that I wish more movies had: a little drama, a little comedy, a premise that pays off at the end and some of the strangest visual surrealism. It made me believe in the power of Wes Bentley and Scott Speedman as actors to say nothing, like I mentioned above, of Jordan Prentice.

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