Day 14

The nominations this week are Dave, Govan, Shabby and Ben. At the time of writing this that could change as the housemates will do a task to avoid eviction so I won’t get into the voting too much.

There is only one thing on my mind today: Crazy lesbian love.

From day 1 I’ve had a problem with Shabby. This was initially based on her upper-class squatter, “independent actress” (you were in Casualty love, that’s not independent), suspenders and hat wearing nonsense. She tries too hard to be “wacky” and it drives me up the wall. It’s false and it’s pretentious which in turn is exactly how I feel about her.

However, what I didn’t expect to see from her was all her teenage hormones flow out in a mess on national television. You see Shabby is in love with her best friend, her best friend has a boyfriend. It’s super kinky lesbian/straight girl forbidden love. And she can’t stand it anymore.

Love me, love me, say that you’ll love me

Now it would be mean of me to point out that Caoimhe looks like a white Grace Jones. That her manlike features and large breasts are the perfect storm for lesbian attention grabbing. That Caoimhe is a clit-teaser leading her friend on purely for the attention and the fact that she is a whore for anything that moves. It would be mean of me to say such things so I won’t. But it doesn’t mean I’m not thinking it.

I don’t really feel bad for Shabby in this scenario either. I’ve noted here before that I feel she’s a raving lunatic but I didn’t realise why before. She has either regressed or always was about 6 years younger than her age. Wild mood swings, constantly horny. I can sympathize with having these symptoms (I’m self aware) but she’s crossing over into creepy territory.

On more than one occasion now Shabby has cornered Caoimhe alone and confessed her feelings. The first time she did this was pretty funny considering how Ife set the whole thing up but if Shabby was a grown up about it in the first place it never would have become such a big deal. Since then she hasn’t shut up expressing her undying love.

The Tree of Temptation (brilliant) gave Shabby a task to stick with Ben and be super nice to him for a day. The prize: a romantic meal with a fellow housemate. It was no surprise that Shabby was going to choose Caoimhe for this but it was highly inappropriate considering A) Caoimhe has a serious boyfriend and B) She’s a friend you’ve just admitted to fancying. It’s just got the words awkward written all over it. And it was.

Would you like some of my fish taco?

But what I thought was hilarious about it all was afterward Shabby couldn’t contain the secret of her task and risked a nasty punishment by confessing her mission to Caoimhe. What was the point in doing it? Shabby needed to tell Caoimhe what she did for her because Shabby thought it was an amazing gesture of love.

Pathetic.

Will this affect her chances of eviction? Probably not. I’m sure the public are probably lapping up all the unrequited love. It’s soap opera stuff. But I personally think that it’s getting a bit weird now. It’s almost as bad as Mario and Ben

Almost.

I’ll be back when someone has been kicked out.

– Aaron Poole
Follow Aaron on Twitter – @AaronFever

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