For those outside of Great Britain and Ireland, we here just recently saw the final of a TV talent show called X-Factor, the winner of which is guaranteed to now have the number one single this Christmas (the song by the way is a cover of a Miley Cyrus track). I say talent competition–more accurately, it’s a singing competition much in the same style as American/Autralian/Afghanistanian/Whereverthehellyou’refromian Idol. This comparison is not surprising as they’re all from the same brain: Simon fucking Cowell. I read a fantastic quote recently about him in an article about the last decade and I’ll pass it on here: “In the 1960s, The Beatles, Bob Dylan, The Beach Boys, et al, transformed pop from the lowest-common-denominator business into an art form. It took only one man to reverse the process.”

After being completely immersed in this spectacle for the last few months, and after being so bloody disappointed in the world because of how it’s all turned out, you could forgive me for being a little disheartened when I sat down to write this latest column update.

I needed something, anything, to make me believe in music again. Actually that’s harsh. There is still plenty of good music out there. But it’s pop music that I miss most of all.
I grew up listening to Motown and The Beatles. When girl groups didn’t have to be pretty or sexy to sing they just had to be able to sing brilliantly. And they did. Frank Sinatra wasn’t a looker. Nobody had to vote via text or phone call to choose the lead singer of The Temptations. You just needed a great song to be number one, it didn’t matter what demographic you were marketed to. Maybe I’m being naive, or maybe I’m just tired of how transparent the industry has become.

The reason why I bring this all up is that I want to world to know my faith has been renewed a little bit after sitting down to write this article. My day just got a little bit nicer. I found at least one band here who makes me want to turn on the radio. Sometimes MySpace gives you exactly what you need.
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THE BLACK TRIANGLE
www.myspace.com/theblacktriangle

I was surprised to see a band who set up their page in September to have over 5000 views. They only have two songs uploaded and one of those is an instrumental. So why the popularity?

The music is decent. I get a taste of grunge rock. The song “Fall For The Placement” wouldn’t be out of place on the soundtrack for The Crow or something similar. Nothing blows me away but it seems competent and respectable in comparison to some of the stuff we’ve come by here before.

Then, on closer inspection, it all seems to make sense. The Black Triangle formed from ex-members of Bambi and (most notably) Future Kings of Spain. The latter group were huge here in Ireland. Probably wouldn’t be known outside of the island but for a long time they were the rock darlings on the gig circuit.

Can this new band bounce back to the sort of heights that they’ve become accustomed to with their previous groups? Who knows. With only two songs to listen to it’s hard to get anything concrete from this. It’s listenable. It certainly seems close to professional. But to try and make a firm decision from such little evidence is a fool’s game.

I think I’ll pop back again in a couple of months to see how they’re getting on. I’m not going to add them now, but I’m not ruling it out in the future.

Presentation = 2/5
Content = Not nearly enough but it’s early days
Music = 3/5
Friend Request = DENIED!

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THE AGENCY
www.myspace.com/theagencyrocks

How have I not heard of these guys before?

Sure, they’re French, so that’s probably a stumbling block for me to come by them but this is so up my alley they should have changed the myspace url to www.myspace.com/heyAarontheagencyrockscheckthemout.

Two parts 1960s beach pop, one part electro outfit and with very few “indie cool” style points, this four piece are a nice breath of fresh air in the modern market. I respect anyone who can make a pop tune as catchy as “Significant” but to throw in the “weeeee” (listen and you’ll know what I’m talking about) proves that they don’t take themselves too seriously either.

One of my favourite tracks isn’t in their playlist but is one of the two live videos presented. “Mystery” presents me with a couple of facts. 1) I really want to see them live now. 2) They know how to harmonize. A lost art which I mourn on a daily basis. 3) They play small venues.

If you have a chance, I implore you to check them out. They genuinely have made me excited and if we can change their label from “unsigned” to “Major” then there will be justice in the world and I can sleep well tonight.

It’s strange, if they were terrible I could fill a page with all the things that annoy me, but when I find a good one like this I lose the words. It’s lucky I don’t find too many then isn’t it?

Presentation = 4/5
Content = Some fun remixes and enough to keep you occupied for at least half an hour.
Music = 5/5
Friend Request = ACCEPTED!

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ALIEN KEYES
www.myspace.com/alienkeyes

To sum a lot of this up I would point to the part of the page where it says “Sounds Like:” The response from Alien Keyes? “Fuck You”. And to be honest I don’t think I can sum this up any clearer. They sound like fuck you.

This is… hardcore thrash experimental… dance? I have no idea. I get the impression that these guys don’t want to be liked though. That they’re trying to make the most inaccessible noise they could think of. They’re totally nonconformist. “We’re, like, blowing people’s mundane minds, man.” Or just taking the piss. One or the other.

With songs like “Bitches On My Dick” and “John Hughes (Don’t You Forget About Him)” I was hoping that they would have some humour which could at the very least make this interesting but the only song mildly worth trying is “Three Mile Island.”

I’d give a more in depth review but to do so would be defeating the purpose. They don’t crave my acceptance. I guess that’s the point.

Presentation = 1/5
Content = An average amount of songs and two nice pictures. That’s it.
Music = 0/5
Friend Request = DENIED!

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LOVERS AND LIARS
www.myspace.com/loversandliarsrock

After the success of the last band who put “rock” in their url I entered this with a positive outlook. This worked to their benefit because if I came across this page in a bad mood I would be a lot harsher than I’m going to be now.

If you read the blurb about themselves on their page you’ll see that in almost every sentence they refer to how different they are from other rock bands–and to a small degree this is true. Other bands might not whisper in every song instead of sing. Other bands wouldn’t have the name Lovers and Liars… This is all I can guess.

They’re not a bad band either. They’re just total try-hards. And if you don’t know what I mean by that statement I will try to explain myself. You know that guy you knew growing up who didn’t really wear anything but jeans and a t-shirt but now that same guy wears skinny tight trousers and red shirts with a waistcoat because they’re so hot right now. I kind of get that vibe from ‘L+L’.

If I was a teenage girl of about fourteen I’d be all over this shit. I’m sure fourteen-year-old girls of the world already are. There are some good melodies here and it honestly sounds radio-ready. Their song “Holding On To Nothing” would probably be the best example of their work. Pleasant but the lyrics are too earnest for me.

How I managed to get through this without using the word “Emo-Fodder” I’ll never know.
But do yourself a favour. If you fancy a laugh listen to “T-Pain’s Tribute to Lovers and Liars” on their playlist. I had to change underwear afterwards.

Presentation = 3/5
Content = Loads of pictures and songs but too much self promotion.
Music = 3/5
Friend Request = DENIED!

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