Welcome back to TV or Not TV where I am currently on vacation.
I know, a confusing statement right? If I’m on vacation why is there a column this week? Well, I’m on vacation from what I think of as my “real” job. This has afforded me the time to document just what exactly went in to the writing of this week’s column. I know, you thought maybe an indepth article about the art of the mid-season finale cliff-hanger may have been something more suited for my time (and your readin), but as I said I’m on vacation so the effort just wasn’t there this week (although you now may know what I’ll be writing about next week).
When I write the column the first thing that I usually do is get the viewing items completed first. They are probably the most tedious as I try to scroll through seven days of television options. I try to keep an open mind and not just gravitate to the things that I watch (as my viewing menu is very limited) and all in all that process can take as much as 8 hours alone (which explains why Entertainment Weekly goes into more detail and has several people writing their recommendations). This process is filled with constant distractions as research leads you down a path of web surfing that sends you three clicks more than you should really follow.
This week, for example, Monday lead to a 30 minute loss of productivity while I tried to determine if I caught the original airing of this week’s How I Met Your Mother repeat. First I looked for a synopsis, then I tried to see if I could watch it. 30 minute, gone just like that.
Another 45 minutes was lost on the discovery of G4‘s airing of Tron. First I wanted to see information about how the movie supposedly didn’t shoot the real ending because the production ran out of money. Then I wanted to see if there was any information out there about TR2N (the sequel teaser shown to Comi-con attendees this year). The Wikipedia page about Tron lead me to reading about the home video game collapse of 1983 and laughing at how the lead identifier of the collapse was the Atari 2600 game ET: The Extra Terrestrial (which truly did suck). Some how this also lead me to reading about the proposed video game for The Last Starfighter and trying to install an actual game made by Rogue Synapse (which I have yet to try to play because, well, I’m trying to finish this column).
Lunch time for my daughter and myself brought another 30 minute respite from writing until I came back and tried to find out more information about the New Year’s Eve shows that were available, what was this about a 50 foot robot in the Tournament of Roses Parade and some how I wandered into wondering if NBC was bringing Medium back in 2009 (the answer is yes by the way, it’s returning February 2nd).
I then spent about 20 to 30 minutes ruminating about whether I was ready to tackle the topic of what makes a good cliff-hanger and what makes a frustrating one. During that time I decided it would be better to take the lazy path that you now read before you (which itself has taken 10 minutes to commit to print).
You may not believe it folks, but you take those distractions and combine them with actual reading/writing and you have something that took around six hours this week to compile. Is the final product worth it? I hope you think so.
Now that I’m done blogging here’s what’s coming up this week.
MONDAY
ABC – 8:00 PM: Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl was a major surprise to me and far less confusing than the two sequels.
NBC – 8:00 PM: One more installment of Greatest Holiday Moments chimes in before the New Year with Hilarious Home Video Countdown. I predict a whiffle ball bat and someones crotch in at least one video.
CBS – 8:30 PM: If you missed the story of How I Met Everyone Else than I highly recommend tonight’s episode of HIMYM.
MTV – 9:00 PM: Brody Jenner of The Hills is looking for his own BFF in Bromance. I really need to work on coming up with my own clever combo word… like maybe watching this would make me bromit?
TUESDAY
ABC – 8:00 PM: Happy New Year, Charlie Brown has never been released to DVD so you may want to watch. I’m not sure how entertaining it will be to watch that bald kid try to cram reading War and Peace and writing a book report on it is, but it is based on an original strip from 1964 to 1965. What the heck, I’ll give it a shot.
G4 – 8:00 PM: Anyone that was a nerdy child in the 80’s I’m sure has soft spot in their heart for TRON.
ABC – 8:30 PM: OK, the story for Rudolph’s Shiny New Year may not be as confusing as those Pirate movies but it still doesn’t make that much sense to me. I’ll probably sit through it for my daughter regardless.
WEDNESDAY
C’mon… it’s New Year’s Eve! If you’re a shut in you’re watching rented movies and if you aren’t you are at a party that is going to have one of the three major networks on. Watching Dick Clark on ABC now is at the point of almost being painful. If you watch FOX you get to see David Cook, Scott Weiland and Robbie Knievel jumps a volcano. NBC offers up Carson Daly with T.I., Ludacris and Katy Perry. I say just go with ABC, turn the sound down and watch the ball drop. Oh, there is one thing I have to mention…
USA – 6:00 AM: The movie Elf has been mentioned more than once in this column in the month of December. What better day to send off the old year and the month with a 24 hour marathon. The residual checks off this movie must be insane.
THURSDAY
USA – 6:00 AM: If your New Year’s Resolution is to be more tidy than you might enjoy the 24 hour Monk marathon. If you have a season pass you might want to make sure your DVR doesn’t try to record it all.
NBC / ABC – 8:00 AM: The 120th edition of the Tournament of Roses Parade will feature a 50 foot robot, 46 floats and Cloris Leachman as the grand marshall. That’s pretty interesting since I think she was the grand marshall at the first one as well.
TBS – 8:00 AM: My niece Katelynn will be thrilled to know that there is a 16 hour marathon of Bones on today.
NBC – 10:00 PM: I have no idea why they are running last season’s finale of The Office but it is a fine show to watch. It is filled lost of funny both from straight forward laughs and awkward moments and misunderstandings.
FRIDAY
TNT – 8:00 PM: Once again looking at the programming grid makes me chuckle. My Big Fat Greek Wedding followed by The Wedding Date. The only thing that would have made this better would have been if they were followed by The Breakup or Irreconcilable Differences.
SCIFI – 9:00 PM: Although I’ve never actually watched an episode tonight’s ep of Stargate: Atlantis sounds intriging. Titled Vegas we find an alternate universe where John Sheppard is a Detective in Sin City. The working title was CSI Atlantis so that should give you an idea of what they were going for with this.
SATURDAY
CBS – 8:00 PM: What do you put on when you think no one is watching? The Ashton Kutcher produced Game Show in My Head. Contestants have to perform tasks and follow instructions via hidden earpierce. Sounds like a demented twist on Cyrano de Bergerac.
ABC – 8:00 PM: Sleepless in Seattle is weird for a romantic comedy film in that the lead characters are never on screen together until the very end. Maybe the guys from Bromance can curl up on the couch together to watch this.
SUNDAY
MTV – 11:00 AM: I don’t know how I feel (other than old) that The Real World is now entering it’s 21st season (and 16th year), but if you are an addict you may want to catch the teaser show Real World Secrets Revealed before the Wednesday premiere.
VH1 – 8:00 PM: They’ve tried to help people find love, they’ve tried helping people in rehab, and now VH1 is going to try to help former heart throbs deal with their lack of current fame in Confessions of a Teen Idol.
FOX – 8:00 PM: If you missed 24: Redemption than you now have another chance to take it in before next weeks 2-night, 4-hour premiere.
NBC – 9:00 PM: Superstars of Dance is like the international dance Olympics. It’s hosted by Riverdance front man Michael Flatley and it is something I have absolutely no interest in watching. You can just tell that someone wanted Dancing with the Stars ratings when they came up with this one.
– Will Wilkins wishes you all a Happy New Year.
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