CLICK HERE TO VOTE ON ROUND 1
We here at Quick Stop Entertainment are true lovers of music, in all its forms. We’re also quite keen on the spirit of competition, and of spurring creativity through said competition.
To that end, we’ve launched a brand new form of creative combat here at the Stop.
In this age of manufactured and painfully earnest talent contests, we’ve decided to instead shine a light on the quirky, quixotic underworld of musicians that don’t get nearly the attention they deserve.
Ah, but I did mention that there was a competition involved…
A few weeks back, we sent out the call for challengers. Hundreds of you heard the call and fought for a chance to be in the initial group. 20 were selected. Only 19 responded in time. Them’s the breaks.
Like a songwriting version of Iron Chef, these challengers will now be presented with a very specific songwriting challenge. They’ll be given one week to complete their songs – however they see fit, within the parameters set forth – after which time the entries will be uploaded to Quick Stop to be voted on by you, the readers.
After one week of intense campaigning and voting, we’ll eliminate the bottom 14 vote-getters – leaving 5 competitors to move on to… ROUND 2.
That’s when things get crazy… But we’ll save the surprise til then.
What do we call this competition?
MASTERS OF SONG FU
To mix things up a bit, we also announced three (well, 4, if you’re being technical) very special Masters who you’ll be going up against in this inaugural edition of MASTERS OF SONG FU. Think of them as the iron chefs of Song Fu, and your ultimate challengers:
JONATHAN COULTON
Jonathan Coulton on Jonathan Coulton: “In 2005 I left my day job writing software to pursue music full time. To keep myself busy I released a new song on this website every week for a year in a project called Thing a Week. A few of those songs became big internet hits (my folky cover of Sir Mix-a-Lot’s “Baby Got Back”, a funny video called “Flickr”, a song called “Code Monkey”), and I am now fortunate enough to make my living as a musician.
I write about a lot of geeky stuff because I am a geek. Some of it’s funny, but a lot of it’s not so funny, and even more of it is somewhere in between. I’ve been compared to They Might Be Giants, Barenaked Ladies, Loudon Wainwright III, and other musicians you REALLY LOVE.
I give lots of music away because I believe it helps my cause, and I love it when people use my music to create other stuff – music videos, pictures, remixes, etc. At the moment I’m unsigned, and I’m proud to say I’ve created this whole thing mostly on my own (with plenty of help from an amazingly supportive bunch of fans). But it certainly is getting busy… I will probably sell out and go Hollywood any day now…”
Official Website: www.jonathancoulton.com
PAUL & STORM
Paul and Storm are a comedy music duo, and they have been performing as a duo since 2004. Before that, they were one half of a cappella band Da Vinci’s Notebook for about 12 years. A Paul and Storm show is part music concert and part standup/improv comedy–just enough of both to fit neatly in neither category. They like to engage the audience, and are known to award snack cakes and/or other prizes for good (and sometimes bad) behavior. Their show would be PERFECT as a cable special, and would make lots of money for whichever brave channel decides to air them first.
Official Website: www.paulandstorm.com
DOC HAMMER
Doc Hammer was born in 1626 in Hamar, Norway, under the name Erik VonHamer. Being the son of a humble cobbler, not much was expected of the young man, other than to cobble and to not complain about all the cobbling. But Doc was destined for greater things. At 17, with nothing more than really well made shoes and a dream, he made his way to Antwerp to study oil painting under the great Rubens. Within a year, the two were at odds. Rubens spoke (infrequently) of Doc as “that creepy skinny kid,” and Doc spoke of Rubens’s work as “kinda unattractive if you really look at it.” By 1648, Doc had relocated to Leiden, where he found his master in Rembrandt. It was there, in his 23rd year, that Doc met “She Who Was To Deliver The Kiss Of Eternal Youth.” After a spicy courtship, “She Who Was To Deliver The Kiss Of Eternal Youth” and Doc were married. By 1650 Doc had grown weary of immortality and committed an unsuccessful suicide by burying his never-corpse in the basement of a Dutch cottage. In 1870, Doc again resurfaced. Using the name Vilhelm Hammershoi, Doc resumed his painting career with mild success. After thanking his bride for “the immortality thing” and nicely reminding her that he had “heard every one of her stories like a billion times,” “She Who Was To Deliver The Kiss Of Eternal Youth” and Doc split up in 1916. Again, Doc literally went underground until, now using the name Armond Hammer, he resurfaced and made a whole mess of money selling overpriced meds to the Russians. Sick of all the baking soda jokes, Doc faked his death. Biding his time till the MC Hammer thing had blown over, Doc again resurfaced as “Doc Hammer.” Today, Doc still paints in oils and writes, voices, and does other crap for The Venture Bros. (a show you can watch on cable TV).
Official Website: www.myspace.com/dochammer
In a moment, you’ll discover the details of the first challenge. First, though, here is the list of challengers:
THE CHALLENGERS
TEARDROP
Teardrop consists of just two members, brothers Jono Renton and Pete Renton. Brought up on the sounds of Saturday morning television in the 90’s they seek to write music that is evocative of both the past and looking forward. Both members use different skills to create their unique sound, often associated with such acts as The Album Leaf, Boards Of Canada, Aphex Twin and other IDM artists. Jono provides the guitars, while Pete provides the synths and drums.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/teardropuk
THE MATT LEES BAND
Matt Lees was born and raised in sheep-lovin’ Wales. At 12-years-old his family decided to move to everything lovin’ Canada and start a new life. Not an easy feat for any person, let alone a less-than-manly pre-teen. Eager to fit in with the Canuck teens he threw himself into the arts. He began an obsessive love affair with music. Writing and singing to express his emotions, he needed to learn an instrument to complete his sound. In the beginning he learned piano but, being lazy, he didn’t want to lug a piano everywhere. Guitar seemed like the easiest choice… plus, chicks dig guitar players. Ego in hand, he now fronts a self-titled band. The MLB fuses a pop-rock sound with a modern blues feel. Playing mainly in Ontario, Canada, Matt has also shared his music with audiences in Europe – even the French! Matt loves long walks on the beach, puppies, sharing his feelings and the smell of dew in the morning. He is currently ‘sticking it to the man’ in the real world while preparing to record and release his debut album (aka scrounging funds and searching for a cheaper studio).
Official Website: myspace.com/mattlees
PAUL FRUMPTON EXPERIENCE FEATURING LARRY
Born in the fall of 2006 in the center of the two-man acoustic comedy rock scene, Columbus, Ohio, the self proclaimed Turner and Hooch of Rock and Roll, The Paul Frumpton Experience Featuring Larry – known more colloquially as Jeff Stormer and Jeremy Hoover – are best described as what happens when comedy, music, caffeine, and improv collide in a chocolaty, peanut buttery explosion of good times. Stormer and Hoover met as students of Ohio State University and have been performing for scraps of food and hobo nickels ever since. Jeremy and Jeff’s major influences include Bacon, Booster Gold & Blue Beetle’s irreverent banter, David Bowie’s crotch in Labyrinth, and a deep-seated love of go karts. Finally, we feel obliged to mention all the things that are off limits to the comedy duo… This list includes NOTHING.
Official Website: myspace.com/thepaulfrumtonexperiencefeaturinglarry
LEX FRIEDMAN
Lex Friedman’s musical influences include artists like They Might Be Giants, Moxy Fruvous, “Weird Al” Yankovic, CAKE, Barenaked Ladies, Tom Lehrer, Ben Folds, and Michael Jackson. Lex has left a smattering of bizarre music videos on YouTube, which have been slowly overtaken by videos of his 18-month-old daughter Anya. He occasionally shares new songs on his blog. He currently appears both weekly and weakly as the host of the “Week in Douchebaggery” on Cracked.com. Lex, his aforementioned daughter Anya, his lovely wife Lauren, and his diabetic maltese Charlie all live together in New Jersey, and sincerely hope that you don’t hold that against them. He gives one of them two injections if insulin each day – guess which! Lex also wrote this sentence. To avoid appearing like a suck-up, Lex has neglected to mention other musical influences of his who may or may not be the Iron Chefs of this Song Fu competition. Let’s just say he happens to also love the musical stylings of a guy whose name rhymes with Shmonathan Shmoulton.
Official Website: www.thefriedmans.net/blog
IN THE AUDIENCE
In the Audience is the newest musical outlet for singer/guitarist Jordan Stowell. At age 18, Jordan has just released his debut EP online and in select independent record stores in the northeast United States. The music has been compared to popular acts like Goo Goo Dolls and Guster as well as smaller acts like Anathallo and The Format. The music of In the Audience would likely fall under the genre of “Indie Pop.” Although likely not making an appearance due to time constraints, the band also includes guitarist Steve Janick. The band mixes calming acoustic guitars and violins, with loud percussion and the occasional keyboard or hand clap. New to the music game, In the Audience is already preparing summer tour dates in select regions of the United States and Canada.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/intheaudience
SARCASM
I picked up the guitar 20 some years ago and still don’t know one scale or the names of most of the chords. After a year of playing I formed a band called The Narrow Way. We wrote such classics as “Polka Hell” and “The Shades of Limbo”. After refining my chops, I then formed a band called Mechanized Death, which was named after that infamous car accident safety movie from the 70’s. We wrote such inspired classics as “Roadkill”, “Tunafish” and “I Don’t Care”. After Mechanized Death, I went solo and now have written hundreds of songs… I even sold one to a morning radio talk show (ahhh… the fame). Lately, I won song of the day at Garageband.com…So I guess my star is still rising.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/sarcasmtheband
THE FLYING DeLOREANS
Hello there! We’re John and Jane DeLorean, and together we are the FLYING DELOREANS. We used to be husband and wife, but after a brief creative hiatus we got a divorce and now are just brother and sister. We have many, many influences, but mainly just really enjoy playing music. Our main instruments are piano and ukulele and guitar and we’re basically the loveable underdog. Well, see ya.
Official Website: myspace.com/theflyingdeloreans
BEN & PETE
Ben Rossow is seeking to inflict upon the world his unique brand of acoustic pop/punk/folk music. Hailing from Mora, Minnesota, this northern songsmith and his collaborator, Pete Morgan, have recorded and performed under the name “Ben & Pete.” Ben plays acoustic guitar and makes noise with his mouth, while Pete generally attracts songbirds with his delightful vocal stylings, and sometimes adds keyboard effects to distract potential enemies. Influences range from Bob Dylan to Weezer, Cheap Trick to The White Stripes.
Official Website: We don’t have one!
CLOAKIE
My Fu is stronger than you! I am Coleman Bear Saunders, or Cloakie to most. At the age of 25 I work with music everyday at my studio that I recently built. I produce, engineer and compose various genres of music with ninja like precision. I have been picking away at the guitar since the age of 7 after watching my Dad play Johnny Cash tunes in the wrong key while singing the wrong lyrics, although I do the same thing because that’s the way I was learnt, ya hear me boy? I live in Kentucky and the music scene isn’t the greatest, so I turn to the internet to pipeline my Fu to the masses for free. I’m getting tired of music these days, I want some more songs about Dragons and fucking! Songs that take you on a journey and let you experience a different world, like movies do. My dream is to compose and score music for video games, TV, and my ultimate goal, the big screen. This is why the Song Fu competition was made for me. All the challenges that the competition presents to me will be similar to the expectations of future employers. Good luck to all, and may the best Fu win.
Official Website: myspace.com/colemansaunders
ELAINE CHAO FINNELL
Elaine Chao Finnell is a singer/songwriter from the San Francisco Bay Area. In her checkered musical past, she has been a choral singer, a pit musician, an a cappella vocalist, a vocal percussionist, a hip hop beatboxer, contemporary Christian worship musician, and a musical librettist. After leaving the a cappella world in 2001, Elaine shifted into the world of hip hop theater, touring with spoken word artist Aya de León, then going solo and performing in such venues as the Yerba Buena Gardens in San Francisco and at the Apollo Theater in New York City. She began writing music at the tender age of 17, co-authoring her first musical with Brian Allan Hobbs. Since then, she has written two full length musicals and two plays. She currently plays regularly at her church as a lead vocalist and rhythm guitarist. While not in her musical pursuits, Elaine can be found in a cubicle at a major software company, at home with her engineer husband and their network of Macs, or studying martial arts at a local university.
Official Website: www.gotspit.com
AIRPLANE VS. AMBULANCE
Airplane vs. Ambulance are a four-piece synth-punk band from Abbotsford, BC. The band’s sound has been described as a blend of pop hooks and indie sensibility, and the’ve crafted their own unique take on modern rock.
Official Website: www.myspace.com/airplanevsambulance
EAST CAROLINA
East Carolina was formed in 2006 when friends Aaron (vocals, keyboards, accordion, etc) and Stuart (electric guitar, bass, keyboards, etc.) realized that, though often praised individually for their musical prowess, together they would be a virtually less-stoppable musical force. Combining in their music elements of alternative and classic rock, comedy, jazz, hilarious banter, polka, and more, East Carolina creates music that is unique, pleasurable, and often unclassifiable. Their original songs range in topic from Spanish love gone wrong to social anxiety to properties of gasses, and beyond. East Carolina is thrilled to be participating in the Masters of Song Fu competition and looks forward to sharing their songs with all of you.
Official Website: www.worldofarcana.com
TO SERVE MANKIND
To Serve Mankind seeks to do just that, via music that makes you think about the world and your place in it differently. Friends since high school, the duo, likened to They Might Be Giants or Barenaked Ladies, have played back yards to front yards and everywhere in between. It seemed like just yesterday To Serve Mankind had absolutely no future, and look at them now, competing in Song Fu against artists such as Paul and Storm and, uh, the Jonathan Coulton. Jeff Little and Bryan Ewing both grew up in Apple Valley, CA, an environment which demands creativity just to stay sane among Joshua trees, dirt, and the Wal*Mart. With a combined vocal range of at least a perfect 5th, To Serve Mankind is ready to take the world… aeriously. Bryan is into Rock, Jeff digs on Funk. Both serve as worship leaders at their respective churches and are married… not to each other… but to one woman each – Bryan to Michelle, Jeff to Jen. Bryan has a son named Malachi, and Jeff is expecting his wife to follow through on this pregnancy thing and produce a daughter, Jane. Jeff, Bryan (and Malachi) love Avatar: The Last Airbender.
Official Website: www.toservemankind.com
GERM
Hello. I am Jeremy Edgington. Call me germ. I live in Springfield, Ohio and I was born here in 1972. I started playing guitar at about 13. I took it seriously only off and on. I love to play. I hate to practice. I just jam. I got began enjoying “deeply listening” to music at a really young age. I was into Kiss when I was in Kindergarten and first grade. I had all of their albums. Second grade came along and out with Kiss, in with Def Lepard! Then came Van Halen and so on. I have a nice recording studio. Buckethead is a huge influence on me. I play bass and guitar. I do drum programming. I also program background ambience. I use the guitar for just ambient noises in songs, too. I will someday release a CD. Maybe…
Official Website: myspace.com/tikisamurai
RELIC’S JETBOAT
Relic’s Jetboat are a modern folk band – this isn’t about acoustic guitars in the coffee shop, it’s songs about modern folk and the events or stories around us. They bring a party band attitude to their songs about Garage Sailin’, Gordon Downie, Ogopogo and The Beachcombers. The songs cross genres as they represent the music that we hear these days. From country to reggae, punk, celtic and rock, the band has been described as “The Barenaked Ladies with an edge”, or this review of the band: “These guys could get a job doing Muppet Music. From Canada, they perform their individual style with ease and an abundance of satire. They take us back to a time of musical innocence when people got off on groups like the Beach Boys.”
Official Website: www.relicsjetboat.com
JEFF MacDOUGALL
The Deal: After 20+ years making music as a hobby, I recently wrote and recorded a song for my daughter. I got a little taste of mild success (hey, my mom liked it). So now I’m taking my music out of the closet, dusting it off, and seeing how it does in the sunshine. Who knew there was so much work in just attempting to do music for a living. I feel like I am opening a Subway franchise (Only opening a Subway franchise seems more fulfilling in a creative way).
Official Website: jeffmacdougall.com
SHANNON MILLER
Shannon is a woman of keen intellect and she is a little cuter than average, but not photogenic, so her picture will not necessarily reflect her attractiveness. She likes to ride vintage bicycles that clunk and whistle so that people in the city know she’s approaching and take notice. When she’s not working her ass off at her corporate job that pays huge cash, she likes to belittle her husband (sorry, fellows, she’s married) and re-arrange her coaster collection. She wants to make it big in Song Fu so that she can finally have an excuse to quit her career and bask in the adoration of her fans. At this time, she only has two fans (three, if you include the kid in the street that sometimes rides by on his scooter and stops for a minute when he hears her playing the guitar in the back yard, or maybe he’s looking at her dog in the window; she’s not sure).
Official Website: We don’t have one
BROADBAND FIASCO
I trained as a film critic at Glasgow University, then as an actor at the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama and then worked in a call centre for three years. Figures. Fed up with offering people death insurance, I taught myself how to edit film and got a job in a Glaswegian production company editing fishing programmes. When the allure of that finally wore off I went freelance for a while before setting up my own company, TheCage.TV Ltd. All through this time I’ve been writing songs to play live and record, in the olden days on MiniDisc and four-tracks and nowadays on Garageband. Currently I’m the only member of the band so it’s essentially solo work, though in theory anyone can contribute.
Official Website: myspace.com/broadbandfiasco
RUN AT THE DOG
Run At The Dog are high energy, rock/pop, category-sluts with multi-gendered vocals and intricate arrangements. They are like Abba meets Faith No More meets Mos Def meets the Mormon Tabernacle Choir meets Steely Dan. The songs of this Minneapolis 5-piece are always written right away, with no respect for the calculating mind. Audience members are unsure whether to dance, laugh, or panic.
Official Website: myspace.com/runatthedog
ROUND 1 CHALLENGE
You must do a song in the style of a classic television show. Not only that, but this song is the theme for a fictional television show about yourself (or your band). By “classic television show” theme song, we mean the type of themes found in shows from the 1960’s – 1980’s (ie Gilligan’s Island, Cheers, The Fall Guy, Diff’rent Strokes, Welcome Back Kotter, Greatest American Hero, Happy Days, Laverne & Shirley, The Facts Of Life, Green Acres, Gimme A Break, The Monkees, etc.). Your theme song must include both lyrics and music. It must run no shorter than 30 seconds, and no longer than one (1) minute. Your theme song must be submitted in mp3 form (128-192kbps) either via e-mail (to songfu @ asitecalledfred.com – remember to remove the spaces) or a file upload service (like RapidShare or YouSendIt). Deadline for submission is 11:59pm EST on Tuesday, May 27th, 2008.
Voting on Round 1 submissions will commence on Wednesday, May 28th, 2008.
If you triumph, not only will you win remarkable (and potentially off-putting) bragging rights and a clutch of fantastic mystery prizes, you will also become the proud owner of the magnificent, one-of-a-kind MASTER OF SONG FU TROPHY, designed and handcrafted by [adult swim] superstar Dana Snyder. Yes. Dana Snyder.
Good luck, and bring on the Fu.
Comments: 15 Comments
May 21st, 2008 at 1:46 am
groovy
May 21st, 2008 at 3:03 am
[…] If you have any interest in checking out the official contest page, you can find it at Quick Stop Entertainment. […]
May 21st, 2008 at 3:09 am
[…] If you have any interest in checking out the official contest page, you can find it at Quick Stop Entertainment. […]
May 21st, 2008 at 2:23 pm
[…] Masters Of Song Fu #1: Round 1 ChallengeLex Friedman’s musical influences include artists like They Might Be Giants, Moxy Fruvous, “Weird Al†Yankovic, CAKE, Barenaked Ladies, Tom Lehrer, Ben Folds, and Michael Jackson. Lex has left a smattering of bizarre music videos on …Quick Stop Entertainment – http://www.quickstopentertainment.com […]
May 21st, 2008 at 6:11 pm
wow, how about that Shannon Miller. funny stuff and great tunes. seems like arena megastar material to me!
May 23rd, 2008 at 1:02 am
The Mark W comment above is from her loving husband (who took that horrible photo) and number one fan. He just took an 8 week improv class and thinks that he is a comedian now. Someone might be a tad jealous…
May 26th, 2008 at 7:21 pm
[…] Stu and I recorded our song for Masters of Song Fu Round 1 today. As you may remember from the last post, we had brilliantly masterminded the tempo so that […]
May 28th, 2008 at 9:38 am
when how where to hear fab first round song entries?
when how where to vote on this thing?
bored already with bios and lame relation commentary.
May 28th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
Am I missing where I should go to listen and vote?
PS: This is an enormous sausage-fest! As Paul and Storm might say, my vote’s for…the ladies…
May 28th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
Yes! Yes! Yes! Where is the voting? Where can we hear the songs? What are you waiting for?
I’ve refreshed the homepage at least 50 times today, waiting to hear 19ish theme songs to nonexistent TV shows.
May 28th, 2008 at 5:47 pm
I went for an early to mid 80’s comedy theme.
I only used Fruity Loops for the drum programing,
my garage sale keyboard for every bit of music, Sonar
and Sound Forge. The mic for the vocals was ran through
my Line 6 POD X3 Live Guitar, bass & vocals Multi Effects Pedal. Just Call Me germ!
May 29th, 2008 at 8:14 am
Just noticed: the links for the Broad Band Fiasco and Run at the Dog are hampered by a rogue forward slash at the end. Just delete it when you get your 404 and you’ll be taken to their MySpace pages just fine.
Good luck, everyone!
May 29th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
[…] it’s in the can and submitted: our first entry in the Quick Stop Entertainment Masters of Song Fu contest. (Click here for an explanation of the contest) Our task for this opening round was to write a […]
May 30th, 2008 at 8:36 am
Seriously – where to vote on this thing? Is there voting? Is this a competition?
February 25th, 2009 at 1:29 pm
[…] If you have any interest in checking out the official contest page, you can find it at Quick Stop Entertainment. […]