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I’m awesome. I wrote a book. It’s got little to do with movies. Download and read “Thank You, Goodnight” right HERE for free.
I just can’t be everywhere at once.
Where once I was able to review and track the goings-on in the latest and greatest in DVD and theatrical releases I’ve found that there are people out there with much more experienced, and entertaining, voices than mine. One of those voices is Ray Schillaci and it’s someone who many have heard but not many have been exposed to.
He happens to live in Phoenix, this insufferable, hellishly hot backwater that is steeped in thievery and meth, with me and I’ve come to know him through various works he’s produced. Further, he was just as excited as I was to catch some of the films at this year’s Phoenix Film Festival and was able to see a few more interesting films than I did.
Oddly, or not oddly, Ray loves to write. Seriously, the mo-fo is just prolific when it comes to the written word and when I asked him to share his thoughts with the 4 people who read this column on a semi-regular basis homeboy really took the project seriously and, bless his heart, he actually came through in a big way. So, I hope you enjoy the voice that is Ray as he cuts right into the one film I savagely trashed the trailer of, LARS AND THE REAL GIRL, and gives a review of WHAT WE DO IS SECRET.
But, before you discover the golden magic that is Raymond I have to implore every one of you to seek out the HAMLET 2 red band trailer and understand that my new summer obsession is this film. There’s so much afoot that I am positive it cannot disappoint. Watch for yourself and let me know if you agree below in the comments.
Director: Jon Avnet
Cast: Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Carla Gugino, 50 Cent, Donnie Wahlberg
Release: September 12, 2008
Synopsis: A pair of veteran New York City police detectives are on the trail of a vigilante serial killer. After 30 years as partners in the pressure cooker environment of the NYPD, highly decorated Detectives David Fisk and Thomas Cowan should be ready for retirement, but aren’t. Before they can hang up their badges, they are called in to investigate the murder of a notorious pimp, which appears to have ties to a case they solved years before. Like the original murder, the victim is a suspected criminal whose body is found accompanied by a four line poem justifying the killing. When additional crimes take place, it becomes clear the detectives are looking for a serial killer, one who targets criminals that have fallen through the cracks of the judicial system. His mission is to do what the cops can’t do on their own–take the culprits off the streets for good. The similarities between the recent killings and their earlier case raise a nagging question: Did they put the wrong man behind bars?
View Trailer:
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Prognosis: So Negative I’m Thinking Of Creating An Entire Sub-Category To Classify It. Is this movie supposed to be coming out in 1986?
From the sound of the synthesizer beating its little heart out I can’t help but think that this film’s promo team was unearthed after their work for I COME IN PEACE and allowed to do their work on this one. Further, I can’t believe it, I am absolutely blown away it, that some person was allowed to write the words “TWO SCREEN LEGENDS†all by themselves on the screen. I am flabbergasted. It’s distracting if nothing else but you know what, I like the unslickness of it. Someone really wanted to keep things loose and, to be honest, I am glad this doesn’t have the stiffness that would have otherwise been the case if any other marketing team was in charge of this campaign. This teaser is the epitome of when Eddie Murphy’s Clarence character in COMING TO AMERICA comments on the stylings of Mr. Randy Watson’s Sexual Chocolate version of “Greatest Love of All†when he says, after his buddy says it was good, that it was really good and terrible. Sums it up perfectly.
That said I enjoy the De Niro voiceover. He’s got silky pipes when he’s not goofing around and if he ever was given enough money to read the bible I might actually pay whatever it cost to hear his dulcet tones rant about Job or the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I have no idea what’s happening on the screen, this teaser really doesn’t want to give up any context, but De Niro’s musings about what it means to be a cop is just enough information that his unloading of what looks like an MP-5 at the shooting range coupled with Al Pacino’s appearance as another cop in this film is enough for me to take the bait.
Cue Nine Inch Nails.
It’s a nice music bed as we get Carla Gugino taking a drag of a cigarette and looking all sorts of warm and glossy (yum) and then we get this Dramamine inducing series of quick shots that really reinforce the good and terrible. I can’t believe someone would allow this to go out into the world as you can’t focus on anything. It’s disjointed in ways that are irreparable and I have no fucking clue if De Niro or Pacino are supposed to be good cops or bad cops.
I can tell you, though, that Fiddy Cent is up in this piece, and that does not help to ballast my opinion just in case you were wondering where I stand on rappers who turn to film in their attempts to “branch outâ€, but it’s De Niro’s “Most people respect the badge…Everyone respects the gun†that pulls me back down off my high horse and engages me once more.
And, to add to that, De Niro is explosively tight when he smiles to a guy (why include context, right? We haven’t needed it this far…) trying to leave a courtroom and slips under his breath that this guy should watch his back. Bobby is the only one who can make me believe, however brief, that this is actually happening. It’s downright spooky but it helps to make me think that this could be something worth noting about this character. He could be an avenger for all things dirty but I am happy that this little moment gives me a reason why I should pay to see this film and not think this is some kind of 15 MINUTES retread.
Director: Andrew Fleming
Cast: Steve Coogan, Catherine Keener, David Arquette, Elizabeth Shue
Release: August 29, 2008
Synopsis: A world premiere at – and the comedy smash of – the 2008 Sundance Film Festival. In the irreverent comedy, a failed actor-turned-worse-high-school-drama teacher (Steve Coogan) rallies his Tucson, AZ students as he conceives and stages a politically incorrect musical sequel to Shakespeare’s Hamlet.
View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)
Prognosis: One Of The Best Trailers This Year. I’ve never laughed with as much gusto as I did watching this trailer.
After my 3rd collegiate course in Shakespeare, they were all done willingly as I had a real mad-on for how he (and possibly Christopher Marlowe, depending on which historians or literary scholars you want to listen to) was able to craft poetic and lyrical dramas, comedies and tragedies in such a tight time frame. There was a lot to appreciate and learn about the guy behind the world’s greatest plays. I appreciate, as well, the marriage between using Shakespeare as a backdrop with starting a trailer with a herpes advertisement.
Seriously, does anyone else get skeeved out as much as I do when one of these idiots start talking about their junk and how since their pubes aren’t scabbing that they’re good to pump and dump with their lady friends? It was all I could do to keep from laughing when Steve Coogan plays out the very same goofiness that these pervs on my television do with a straight face. Further, I’m not annoyed in the slightest by Voice Over Guy letting me know he’s a down on his luck actor in need of some kind of validation. Teaching seems like the default choice and, as it’s explained to us, when he’s not good at that either (the wayward trash can hitting one of the kids in the melon is priceless) the wheels come off in all sorts of ways.
“Mango ice tea is my kryptonite!â€
No bullshit, the giggles keep coming when his students spike his fruity drink at an after school function. I’m not one to really enjoy the cheap and easy laugh but this is done so well that I was welling up with good belly laughs as Steve explains to his class, the day after, about the dangers of acid and then asks for the whereabouts of his pants.
We veer, once more, into well-trodden territory with the “event†kind of plot device, i.e. the kids need to raise X amount of dollars to save the children’s hospital or some guys need to win the big game in order to keep one of their grandparents safe from a machete wielding maniac who will slit their throat if they don’t come through, but the movie looks like it’s going to take its Bigfoot and run roughshod over the whole deal.
Coogan having to come up with the most brilliant play in his life is not only funny in itself, because he seems to be such an incompetent fuck up, but his writers block, culminating in the outright cursing of his cat, is priceless.
Notching things up further, as well, is when this film just throttles it and Coogan’s desperation becomes the basis for the most absurd and greatest play of all time. Having Jesus and Hamlet sharing the same space, through the use of a convenient time machine, and the employ of a gay chorus who a cappella “Maniac†is something that needs to be experienced.
“You have Satan French kissing the president of the United States!â€
I know it couldn’t get any weird but it does. Having a musical number “Rock Me Sexy Jesus†seems like an aberration but it’s all good when a fellow cast member lets it be known they’re going to hell for this play. He’s right on that account.
Toss in a light saber battle and a wicked awesome display of comedic relief from Elizabeth Shue as herself and you’ve got yourself a movie that you should not only be anticipating but getting excited in its debut come August.
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Welcome to the Wide World of Ray
Bio.
I hate introductions. Never been comfortable with them. But it’s a necessary evil to get ahead and take one from point A to B. Frankly, I’d like to lay it out and just be done with it. I hate writing about myself, but eventually I end up saying far too much and not sure when to put a stop to it. So, with much consternation, I’ll set forth and tell you I’m Ray Schillaci a professed film enthusiasts whose wife thinks he’s downright obsessive. She insists I love film more than her, our kids and dog. Not true, I love that dog!
I have over 25 years experience in the motion picture and television industry. The last five years I shared duties running one of the major unions in Hollywood. I was one of the directors of FTAC (Film Television Action Committee) discouraging runaway film and television production during the exodus to Canada. I was picked as one of the speakers of the largest rally in Hollywood history. Unfortunately, I went after a famous Latino actor (who will remain nameless) who completely went off the subject with a rant and rave that left many confused. It was up to me to bring it back down to earth.
That was tough, but it must have gone well since I was asked to join a chosen few that would not only hold court with Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa but also go to Sacramento and join the group on the steps of the capitol. Once there we were invited in to address the growing problem of the outsourcing of Hollywood. Which if you ask me, was already too little too late since America was outsourcing itself long before it ever affected Hollywood. The only difference being is that the Hollywood workers had survived depressions, recessions, and countless strikes. They never thought anybody would think of outsourcing them. Suddenly they had a real threat on their hands with the tax incentives Canada, Budapest and so many others were offering.
Sorry, don’t mean to digress. I tend to do that when it comes to Hollywood’s politics. Getting back on the subject of me; while continuing to work my way up in the industry I so desperately had an obsession/love for I played the comedy circuit for a brief three years working along side Arsenio Hall, Louie Anderson and Jenny Jones to name a few. God, the stories I have!
The same could be said of all the antics I witnessed on the Universal lot. The most notorious being a prominent director, up for manslaughter charges due to a tragic mishap on his set. He decided to have fun one day just before the trial by taking a machine gun filled with blanks and shooting it at an oncoming tram full of tourists. There are so many fond memories, meeting Rob Bottin (special effects whiz kid) while preparing for The Thing and being one of the chosen few that was allowed on the closed set. Nailing rubber fetuses all over the lot during the filming of the TV mini-series Brave New World. Working with and inspiring a young cinematographer to shoot the moon and develop his own piece of madness on a shoestring budget creating a minor cult sensation in the late 80’s, Surf Nazi’s Must Die! I apologize to the public for that one.
After quitting comedy, I decided to put all my efforts into writing. My first script, a coming-of-age horror flick, nabbed me my first agent. But it was all for naught. The three scripts I had written over three years were shopped but never picked up. Later, elements or whole scenes were lifted and placed into other films but I had no legal recourse in the end. I left my agent and continued to write with a great deal of help from my mentor, a old Roger Corman protégée. He had produced a documentary from a very popular book in the 70’s, Future Shock. He was a high profile executive at Fox at one time. And, had worked with a variety of talent from Coppola to Cameron.
He was always hard on me but insisted I had great vision and my writing continued to improve as the years went on. My favorite recollection of our mutual interest is the day he asked my opinion on some up-and-coming writers who had a script he was thinking of producing. After reading it I was blown away, it read like a late 80’s version of “In the Heat of the Night†but far grittier. I was fortunate to sit down with the two wunderkinds, whose looks were deceiving. I remember the one guy distinctly with his work shirt out; cut-off shorts and scraggly beard that made him look like a hick. It was hard to imagine that this was one of the guys responsible for such a powerful script – Billy Bob Thorton. My mentor spent years trying to get it produced but lost the rights and the film was eventually made as “One False Moveâ€. Unfortunately the media jumped on a bandwagon heralding the bravery of a new black director when his pacing and vision were weak compared to the script I read.
One of many lessons I would eventually learn. No matter how good the script is the producer, director or studio execs may find a way to fuck it up. Probably my favorite example was when I was turned on to “Alien Nation†written by James Cameron. It rocked from beginning to end. I told everybody how great that movie was going to be. Then it came out and my validity went out the door. I was shocked – how can anybody ruin something that good. Over the years, I’ve seen how.
I continued to write undaunted. I had several meetings at Universal over a couple of very different scripts that were admired by some readers and disdained by others. It didn’t bother me after I was able to see some reader’s reports on other more prominent writers. Half the time the description of the story was not accurate. It was if these people just glanced over the work and came up with any reason to turn it down. After all if you recommended a project it could easily be your ass if it did not do well in the end.
I had a project at Fox that was held captive for four grueling months because the producer (not my mentor) was holding it as ransom, along with a couple of other projects, until their contract was renewed. The bottom eventually fell out once the negotiations were settled and the Gulf War broke out. An action/adventure of mine was in development hell three years ago while I was V.P. of Marketing and Sales for Fortitude Studios.
I recently finished my latest script about the fantasy of reality TV. A combination hate letter to the industry and love letter to humanity. It’s currently making the rounds with a few independent hands. I also just finished as one of the presenters at the 8th Annual Phoenix Film Festival. Talk about being in one’s element. My tastes vary and I appreciate commercial as well as independent film. My only beef is boredom, retreads and a story that has nothing to say. Life’s too short not to be entertained.
LARS AND THE REAL GIRL (Available on DVD right now)
Not a False Note in Real Girl
I can only imagine how Lars and the Real Girl would have failed in different hands. Any one of our favorite screen funny men could have easily launched it into sublime orbit or underplayed to yawning effect. And, the same could be said for some other major directors as well. The viewers can be thankful that this complex yet simple touching story was handled with a fine balance, as was Ryan Gosling’s portrayal as Lars.
Lars is a young man with a sad life who is socially dysfunctional. But no one has bothered to help this man-child out of his shell. He winces at the very thought of being touched, especially by women. Nobody in the small northern town knows why Lars is the way he is, but they accept him as a harmless soul. That is till the day he raises eyebrows by introducing his new ladylove Bianca that he ordered on the Internet.
In most circles Bianca would be considered the ultimate sex doll. She looks and feels life-like, and anatomically correct to boot. But Lars has only the purest intentions for his possible mail-order bride. He goes as far as to ask his brother and sister-in-law if they will take her in while she’s visiting him. Lars would never suggest that she stay in the same house as him. His invention becomes the one non-threatening woman in his life. Until family and friends step carefully and thoughtfully into his world and make Bianca one of the most popular people in town.
The story is reminiscent of the movie Harvey, where Jimmy Stewart befriends an imaginary six-foot rabbit. But Lar’s goes beyond its whimsical predecessor, touching on various emotions while treading on dangerous ground. Let’s face it; a fluffy six-foot bunny is far more accepting than a life-size sex doll. The movie does elicit its share of uncomfortable laughs but does not go after the grotesque or raunchy, which have permeated the comedies of late.
Gosling’s performance is beautifully subtle with all the nuances that a great actor of his kind can share. I could not help but notice that he reminds me so much of the comedian/actor Andy Kaufman sans the psychotic antics. It’s a stellar turn that sets the pace to the picture as a whole.
Along with Gosling is a supporting cast that wins your heart with every fateful turn. Kelli Garner as the one girl who takes an interest in Lars from the very beginning is awkwardly charming. She has your heart break simultaneously with Gosling’s performance. Emily Mortimer and Paul Schneider also bring much pathos to the table with a nuance to their roles that merely add so much to this wonderful story that is funny, tragic and eventually up-lifting. Who would think that a sex doll would bring so much warmth and passion beyond the dark confines of one’s private bedroom?
WHAT WE DO IS SECRET
Filmmaker Friendly Festival
I had the fortunate chance to be part of the 8th Annual Phoenix Film Festival. Both filmmakers and fans joined together to view an array of talent spread out over seven days. There was a wonderful sense of camaraderie that permeated lending tremendous support in a competitive arena. And, why not, these are after all independents banding together over one goal – to be seen and recognized.
Unfortunately, I did not have enough hours in my days to witness all of the ambitious work that was screened before the public. There were a multitude of films both features and shorts that elicited a gamut of emotions. Not all of them good, mind you.
There was the handful that makes one’s head shake in wonder, how did this ever get financed. The answer is; persistence, a belief and blindness that overrides bad decisions, making the whole process a crapshoot creating you-know-what in the end. The amazing part – some of that crap had good talent and will get a distribution deal over films with an unknown cast and a great story. The whole process is frustrating when you listen to what the filmmakers put themselves through. But it can all be worth it when one is able to put out a gem of an original work, as did Rodger Grossman, producer/director/co-writer of What We Do is Secret.
As per the title, the same could be said for the film itself if one is not opened to the Punk Rock movement of the 70’s. I will admit I had little interest. I nearly waved it off as a minor Sid & Nancy. But Grossman manages to engage us in the first ten minutes with characters that are as engrossing (but perhaps not as likeable) as the ones we witnessed and dearly loved in The Commitments. Not to mention that Shane West as Darby Crash gives a performance that is so fine-tuned it’s hard to believe he did not live in that era.
The story at first glance may not sound like much; a seminal and pioneering punk rock band, The Germs with their lead singer and self-destructive profit, Darby Crash, explode into the L.A. punk rock scene with fervor like no other. Darby has a five-year plan to be a legendary hero and top it off with suicide. The Germs pack houses but also end up eclipsing their music with their antics that get them banned from every club in L.A. There lies the quandary; you’ve established your notoriety with both music and showmanship but you have nowhere to go to display it.
The story continues to fascinate as the group convinces a new record producer to be his premier band and end up with a glowing review from Rolling Stone. Darby continues to push the envelope with personal and band relationships, and even abandons the band at one point to visit England and dig even further into the punk rock scene with drastic results. The eventual reuniting is eclectic to say the least. One may think, where do you go from here? Unfortunately, Darby’s answer was infamy or at least that’s what he thought. He ended up being eclipsed by one of the most tragic losses in music history, leaving Darby as a mere blip on the rock radar.
At the heart of this film is a love of story. A tragedy told with wit, humor, and all the drama of youth itself. The performances like the story are raw and ripe with emotion. Anybody that likes music or fell in love with movies like Rebel Without a Cause owes it to treat him or herself to this ode of youth seeking the holy grail of fame. It’s a film bigger than life and deserves to be seen on the big screen displaying all of its power.
Comments: 3 Comments
3 Responses to “Trailer Park: HAMLET is back once more. This time with lightsabers.”Leave a Reply |
May 1st, 2008 at 12:38 pm
Dad,
I always knew you as the dad that worked in Hollywood, but reading your bio really put all the puzzle pieces together. It’s nice to know the titles of some of your real accomplishments, since I feel like I was so young and caught up in the excitement of hi-jacking golf carts to take our own trips of Universal, and visiting movie sets that I didn’t realize what a big deal you were. Hollywood was lucky to have you when they did dad, and even if you never get the satisfaction of a blockbuster script, you’ll always be a Hollywood motion picture mainstay to me.
Your reviews of Lars and the Real Girl and What We Do Is Secret were excellent. I officially vow to rent Lars and the Real Girl from blockbuster this weekend, it sounds just like the perverse comic relief I enjoy, and maybe I’ll check out What We Do Is Secret too.
Love,
Jessie
May 3rd, 2008 at 1:45 am
I loved the reviews written by Ray. They were insightful and descriptive without giving anything away. They really make one interested in seeing (or not) seeing these films, isn’t that what a review is supposed to do?
I have read many of Ray’s scripts, but never his reviews. Great job!!
I have known Ray for over 15 years and can honestly say he is the most honest person I have ever met. That is quite something for anyone even remotely connected to Hollywood!
March 10th, 2009 at 10:22 am
Ray,
Great reviews! Always knew you should be writing!!! : )