By Christopher Stipp

Archives? Right Here…And The Way Way Back Archives Are Here

I’m awesome. I wrote a book. It’s got little to do with movies. Download and read “Thank You, Goodnight” right HERE for free.

Yeah, so, the column will have nothing to do with the title. Even I can’t be quippy 24/7 unlike those who get paid to come up with “teh” awesome teasers. I will say, though, that there was a couple of things that I wanted to cover this week before tossing out a trailer review.

First, go check out the ScreenGeeks Radio Podcast. I listen to many Podcasts during my week (This Week in Tech, MacBreak Weekly, Sound Opinions, On The Media and scads of others) but there is only one that is consistently excellent about covering what’s happening in the realm of film from a fan’s perspective. They’re not snarky, they’re not out to prove how much more they know than you (I’m looking at you Elvis Mitchell. Seriously, stop with the focus on how slow and how smooth you can make your voice sound as you bob and weave through an interview) and it’s always worth your time. I’ve been on the show a couple of times and I implore you to check out their latest (Plus I’m on it. Yahtzee…). If there was a blue collar award for hardest working Podcast this would be it.

Second, weeks back I gave a shout out to Red Princess Blues, an animated short starring the voice talent of Paula Garces from HAROLD & KUMAR GO TO WHITE CASTLE. I was informed that you can now check out the entire 7 minute short on-line right here. Usually I wouldn’t bring this kind of small nugget to the surface but the man behind the lens, Alex Ferrari, also mentioned that the film will be playing at the Cannes International Film Festival this year. I’ve covered a few of his comings and goings in this column so it’s absolutely worthy to give some extra attention and props for getting along in his career so nicely.

Third, I went to the Phoenix Film Festival last week and of all the movies which were screened I enjoyed a little film called SON OF RAMBOW the greatest. It’s hard to describe a film like this to someone who might be the right kind of person to see it but I can tell you what it isn’t: art house, inaccessible, difficult, highfalutin, pretentious or slow. I’ll be running a review soon enough as I get close to interviewing the film’s writer/director but I cannot express my hope that this film is on everyone else’s radar as we head into summer. While I can’t yet write at length about what made this movie so special I can say that the film’s 3rd act is deliciously handled in a way that only a robot could not watch without feeling something tug on the heart.

Fourth, Randy Pausch. Since I seem to be the only one reading my own musings I thought I would bring up this not so completely unrelated piece of entertainment information. I watched that Diane Sawyer ABC News special on Randy Pausch’s “Last Lecture” phenomenon. As this special unfurled towards its end, making this one of the reasons why those who eschew television and even the Internet deserving of our contempt, if you were really paying attention, the message that Randy has and the utter astonishment that a man in his position hasn’t let his malady completely cripple his spirit takes a backseat to his grip on humanity. I’ve seen countless stories of people who have overcome adversity in their lives and been in the hot seat with some vapid talk show host asking the same kinds of questions but to watch Randy talk about what it’s like to be staring down death, knowing full well it’s going to win, was enough for me to carve a little space in the world to tell you that looking into his book that was released this week would be a very good thing.

WHERE IN THE WORLD IS OSAMA BIN LADEN? (2008)

Director: Morgan Spurlock
Cast: Morgan Spurlock
Release: April 18, 2008
Synopsis: If Morgan Spurlock has learned anything from over 30 years of movie-watching, it’s that if the world needs saving, it’s best done by one lone man willing to face danger head on to take it down, action hero style. So, with no military experience, knowledge or expertise, he sets off to do what the CIA, FBI and countless bounty hunters have failed to do: find the world’s most wanted man. Why take on such a seemingly impossible mission? Simple-he wants to make the world safe for his soon to be born child. But before he finds Osama bin Laden, he first needs to learn where he came from, what makes him tick, and most importantly, what exactly created bin Laden to begin with..

View Trailer:
* Large (QuickTime)

Prognosis: Negative. Let me start by saying that I absolutely want to see this film.

I say film because a lot has been made of the genre of documentaries that have been churned out, like SICKO and Spurlock’s SUPER SIZE ME, that mix in a little of the theatrical and exaggerated in order to tell their stories. Moore’s grandstanding on a boat with a bullhorn, Spurlock’s obvious extrapolation that if you eat shit for a month that you will feel like shit, all points to the kind of storytelling that blurs the line between absolute truth and the liberties we would all take if we had to write college term papers on health care and fast food, respectively.

I say all this because the beginning of this trailer is absolutely theatrical in how it presents its theory about wanting to find Osama Bin Laden. We’ve got the heady voiceover guy talking in all sorts of dramatic tone, Stonehenge, the Dead Sea Scrolls, Egyptian hieroglyphs, things you would associate with being part of history’s greatest accomplishments. Then you have Spurlock acting like a gimp by bellowing “Yoo-hoo…Osamaaaa” into some wayward cave.

Am I the only one who would think twice about respecting this guy’s objectivity about the subject matter at hand?

I get it, it’s supposed to be amusing. His even better point that telling us he’s watched a whole lot of action movies and that the world’s problems can be solved by one guy is an excellent way of getting me to believe that this is going to be an honest documentary.

I’m not really sure what Reality Based Protection has to do with going into pretty scary places, as he says, but I know the hours I spend watching FRONTLINE on PBS in particular about the continuing conflict inside of Pakistan of extremely dangerous proportions being reported by some white guy never becomes part of the conversation. Aside from that, the comment about Spurlock wanting to know how to say “Don’t take me, take my cameraman” is a lovely bonus as well. I wish I could be just as ignorant as the people this is being pitched to and think it’s all really funny but I can’t muster enough ignorance to find the sequence of great comedy.

The next part of the trailer where we see our esteemed documentarian in traditional Middle Eastern garb, in an attempt to show us how he’s going to find Osama, by walking up to street folk and just asking, He does the same as he heads into Morocco and who knows where else as he attempts to find this most elusive of fugitives.

I will say that the moment where Spurlock tracks down Osama’s uncle where we are given hardly anything worth watching regarding this meeting between the two of them; this is where you would possibly garner some interest from me but it’s obvious that absurdity is where things are going with this ad campaign.

This was made all too clear as he’s asking some young woman about some hand moisturizer, indulges her for a moment, and then unloads with the “Do you know where I can find Osama?” I’m not sure if this is the way to go about pitching this documentary but it certainly disappoints me.

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