Any bloke at least half-interested in the entertainments of our day can probably, without much pause, spout off a list of their top three favorite actors. Actors, the superstars in particular, relate to us a lot like the people in our lives. We know who we want to hang out with all the time, who we can’t stand, and who we would like to know biblically. However, much like in real life, what about acquaintances, the people we know through a friend of a friend? The guy or gal that’s to the left of the person you came to see? They don’t annoy you, nor stir strong emotions, but every now and then they add something to the conversation that just so happens to be relevant, funny, or even damn brilliant. They are never in the spotlight, but every now and then they come out of their quiet little shell, play to the viewing crowd beautifully, and then retreat away into the blurry cerebral depths of their friend’s friends. The cinematic equivalent of such is, in my opinion, the most noble of all Hollywood screen actors…the character actor. This brings us to my first volume of “HEY, IT’S THAT GUY!” A series of columns I will do sporadically, celebrating my favorite moments of the careers of some of those people that we never go to the theater to see, but always enjoy it when they just happen to be there.

One particular giant of the tiny world of character acting has been in the business for a solid 22 years. He has shared the screen with the likes of Jack Nicholson, Jim Carrey, Nicholas Cage, Ben Stiller, and most recently Owen Wilson. He has appeared in a multitude of very high profile shows such as The X-files, Beverly Hills 90210, The Larry Sanders Show, Freaks and Geeks, and CSI. According to Wikipedia, he even was an inspiration to the new god of comedy, Judd Apatow. During the production of Heavyweights, for which Apatow was a writer, our man-of-the-hour was a minor antagonistic role. He had a mix-tape of his favorite porno scenes, thus birthing Judd’s idea for the BONER JAMS ’03 joke in The 40-Year-Old Virgin. Who is he? Why all the build up? I think that two unsung decades in the business should grant him some kind of king-like introduction. He is best-known as the second banana to Weird Al Yankovic’s George Newman, in one of the greatest cult comedy movies of all time…UHF! The man of which I speak is none other then…David Bowe!!! NO! not the singer; there’s no “I” before the “E.” It’s this guy:

That’s right, IT’S THAT GUY! He can most recently be seen in a few commercials and Drillbit Taylor. As an avid comedy fiend since I was a plump little youngling, Mr. Bowe has been in my life almost as long as my brain has been self-aware. Of course his being in UHF was always the kicker, I think I rented that movie so many times from my local library that I was actually able to recite it word for word before I could do the same with the pledge of allegiance. My sick adolescent obsession aside, this led me to have David Bowe’s face burned into the back of my skull, and as time passed and he played more comedy bit parts, I would always give a silent eyebrow-lift of excitement when ever “That dude from UHF” was in a movie. As I got older, I realized that my excitement was not just because he was in the Weird Al movie, but I had grown to realize that the man had solid talent and was genuinely funny.

I am going to go over a few of my favorite movies that David Bowe was involved with, specifically trying to center on his scenes and not the entire movie. The hardest part about most of these is they are bit parts, like a cameo they give to A-list celebrity, but shorter. So I shall do my best to give Mr. Bowe justice with the little screen time he’s given. My goal is more to call attention to his roles, because honestly there is not much to say about a 90 second performance. I would love to meticulously squirm through his entire career, but I don’t have that kind of time, or space. Also, while I think Mr. Bowe is very talented, he has been in his fare share of crap, just like any other character actor. I really don’t think going over the specifics of his performance in Python will in any way celebrate him. I must sadly inform you, and my inner movie geek self, that I have never really seen any of his non-comedic roles. It’s been almost a decade since I last watched A Few Good Men, and I don’t think his scene in The Rock, while cool, should count as serious. Please excuse any over-enthusiasm I pour out over his films, for I have probably seen five of the six comedies I’m going to mention over twenty times a piece.

Heavyweights, the quintessential fat-camp movie for any guy that was born during the Reagan administration, features Mr. Bowe playing one of his few villainous roles. Directed by Steven Brill, co-written by Judd Apatow, and starring Ben Stiller. By the way, as Tony Perkis, Stiller gives one of the funniest performances in his career playing a psycho exercise-crazy camp owner, a character almost identical to the one he played in Dodgeball, yet no one seemed to notice. However, we aren’t here to wash praise over Mr. Stiller. David Bowe plays the extremely clichéd elitist counselor from the “evil” sports orientated Camp MVP across the pond. In what is probably his most “meaty” scene, Pat, the fat counselor from Camp Hope (the fat kid camp), quietly inquires to Chris Donnelly (David Bowe) if it is at all possible for his well-trained athletic campers to take it easy on the tubby kids in a baseball game. Donnelly, with much glee, says no in so many words, all the while placating him under his breath.

He is only in about three scenes, but he plays a pretty glorious dickhead, and you get to see him in a toga during the Apache relay at the climax, if you fancy that sort of thing.

Chris Donnelly could be seen as a rather awful human being because he actually goes to the trouble of motor-boating his MVP campers over to Camp Hope in order to spray their dock with degrading graffiti. He is not the main antagonist however, a role that falls on Ben Stiller. The part may be small, or large compared to some of his other roles, but it would be ignorant of me to ignore it. It’s a lynchpin role. Its existence is small but vital. His skilled nuances as an athletic asshole, one that pretty much gets off on embarrassing fat kids, helps to sell this simple little comedy, it’s plot, and it’s thin social commentary, all the more.

This film is a good jumping off point in understanding his career and the careers of those like him. The layperson would never give one cellular brain function to noticing that the smaller roles, especially in a harmless family comedy such as Heavyweights, if not executed with acute care, really can cause all to crumble. FILMS DO NOT STAND ON THE LEGS OF A-LIST STARS ALONE. That is a good lesson for most, for I fear that there are still a majority of people out there that actually believe actors MAKE movies themselves. I know it may come as a shock to some, but Denzel or say Russell Crowe don’t write, shoot, edit, and direct the movies they’re in, other talented people do that. Also, I realize I may sound like I’m touting Heavyweights as if it were Citizen Kane by calling it a “film” and alluding to how the greatness of all that it encompasses would crumble without such an amazing cast. I don’t think that. It’s merely a harmless, but very funny (perhaps given new creditability considering Apatow’s involvement) comedy that I am using to make a point, so please don’t crucify me yet. I assure you I’ll give you plenty of other opportunities to nail my taste to a cross, if not in this article, at some point in the future of my blathering.

It can easily be said that David Bowe has something of a well-trained knack for showing up in extremely beloved, but initially hated, cult comedies. Now, being that there is such sparse information regarding his career, I do not know if his film choices were his own, pure luck, those of an agent, or recommendations through actor friends, but something really made a constant in his career. The David Bowe performance in the gargantuan cult masterpiece Freaked is a perfect example of this career trend. The 1993 Tom Stern-Alex Winter (Bill of Bill and Ted) directed, studio-oppressed, film concerning a conceited actor, played by Winter, getting turned into a hideous mutant half-beast boy by a crazed redneck with his own freak-making machine. If you’ve never seen it, nor even heard of it, I implore you to check it out on DVD immediately. This is a little underdog of a movie for those of you with a sick sense of humor and a love for extremely creative make-up effects, possibly the best of the 90’s. Randy Quaid, in his only comedic performance that rivals that of Cousin Eddie, plays Elijah C. Skuggs, an evil redneck who hosts his own freak show populated by morbid creations that he himself made. He does this by purchasing a radioactive blue snot-like substance, called Zygrot 24, from a huge tyrant corporation known as EES, the Everything Except Shoes Corporation.

The movie features wonderful Naked Gun style humor and tons of odd celebrity cameos such as Keanu Reeves (Bill and Ted together again!), Mr. T, Bobcat Goldthwait, William Sadler (Bill and Ted and Death together again!), and of course David Bowe in a role so small he doesn’t even merit a name. He plays an EES assistant. The reason I wanted to talk about this role, other then the obvious fact that I love this movie with all the meat in my skull, is because, once again, it’s very pivotal. You see at the end of the movie EES turns its back on Elijah C. Skuggs and tries to steal his freak-machine. David Bowe is the man who says, “This machine is now the sole property of the Everything Except Shoes Corporation,” thus prompting Randy Quaid to hose down all the EES employees with green sludge that melts them all down into a huge anthropomorphic screaming shoe made of twisted flesh.

Genius? YES! Does Mr. Bowe do much else in the rest of the movie? NO! However that is irrelevant, because it’s an amazing movie and our man of the hour says one of the most plot concluding lines in the whole picture. Well done, sir. Well done. So goes the life of a character actor.

This next performance, for which I actually think he spends less time on screen then in Freaked, is in the Ben Stiller-directed dark comedy masterpiece, The Cable Guy. It also happens to be my absolute favorite Jim Carrey movie (You can start throwing your stones now.) I don’t think it’s remotely necessary for me to go into the details of this film. By now you have probably made your decision if it’s post-Ace Ventura garbage or perhaps a extremely well-crafted psychological comedy about the horrors of what a life in front of the boob tube can do to the human mind. Trust me…it’s the latter, I sadly know. If you hate it, all I can say is, give it another chance and try to focus on the twisted dark side of the humor instead of what could be construed as just stupidity.

I must remind you that I am doing my best not to review these movies, which believe it or not is proving rather difficult as it just so happens that Mr. Bowe is in some of my favorite movies of all time. I press on. The Cable Guy culminates in a huge scene involving Carrey’s character getting badly wounded and a rescue helicopter getting flown in. This brings us to David Bowe, as he is listed in the credits as helicopter paramedic. They put the cable guy on the helicopter, once again lonely and without a friend, and low and behold there in the copter sits David Bowe who leans over gently and says “Hang in there, pal. You’re gonna make it, buddy.” The cable guy slyly looks up at him and asks the oh-so-scary question, “Hey, am I really your buddy?” Bowe uses his signature (to anyone who recognizes him) semi-grin of speculation here (He does have a very rubber face especially considering his abnormally emotive forehead.) The paramedic then makes the obviously colossal mistake of responding with a very pert, “Yeah, sure you are!” Carrey gives a devilish look, and cut to the credits.

What has always enthused me the most about this scene is that I vividly imagine The Cable Guy 2 starring David Bowe as a main character and all the havoc wreaked upon him by Carrey’s pathetically insane loner. If only something as dangerously cool and risky as that would happen, which it won’t. It’s a pitch-perfect ending to a nigh perfect movie (don’t kill me, please?), a very large part of which is thankful to Mr. Bowe himself. It is NOT thankful to the obvious blue screened helicopter windows that they didn’t bother to fill in. My guess is the shadows caused by the blades were flubbing up the imposed background, so they just let it be. That OR the cable guy died and David Bowe is a helicopter angel taking him to the blue ether of Heaven and the ceiling windows are denoting such…no, it’s just blue screening.

Mr. Bowe has performed in the movie Freaked alongside possibly the two greatest “DUDES” to ever grace the silver screen. His connection to Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter, as loose as it may be, has some very close resemblance to that of his earlier career. Bowe has had semi-supporting roles in two forgotten comedies playing a surfer-dude and a biker-dude respectively. In the 1987 beach spoof Back to the Beach starring Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello as themselves, we get to see David Bowe play a bone-headed surfer named Mountain.

Back to the Beach was one of those classic midnight movies you catch a thousand times on TBS in the thick of twilight insomnia. Probably best caught on TV somewhere in the early 90’s. I fell deeply in lust with it, and especially with a particular scene. In the movie, Mountain (David Bowe) runs his own highrise beach lookout, home of Mountain’s Surf Report and comprised of several monitors all showing various wave activity, where all the wildly neon-swimsuit-clad surfing deadbeats pass out each night after supposedly catching waves constantly all day. In his one genius starring scene, we get to see the loft completely covered in snoring surfers, in the middle lays a hung over Frankie Avalon witnessing the chaos. The alarm clock goes off, Mountain starts yelling at everyone through a megaphone. Every guy instantly jumps to life, the phones start ringing and all these half-naked men scramble to put on their bathing suits in a room no bigger then a rich kid’s sandbox. Here is where the comedic gifts of David Bowe come in. He frantically starts picking up the phones, screaming the various conditions of the waves and pleading, assumedly to other crazed surfers, for them to “GET ON YOUR BOARDS!” All of this is done in a surfer voice so perfect, for the 80’s at least, it rivals that of Spicoli, or Bill and Ted. All of the guys start to viciously rush out. Mountain, answering the phone again, yells to his buddy Webby saying his mom is on the line. Webby refuses to talk, trumpeting how he HAS to surf and in one of the funniest moments of the film David Bowe without any pause says “uh…sorry ma’am, he’s dead.” Then instantly hangs up.

This is subsequently followed by Mountain looking out on the ocean with binoculars, screaming some almost incomprehensible surf lingo and then posing, tongue flung out KISS-style, to the beginning strums of Wipeout before he runs yonder with the rest. It’s a hilarious scene, and it’s completely his. This was either his first or second movie too, so whatever it is that he has, he had it from the beginning. Back to the Beach definitely without question is my second favorite appearance of David Bowe, If not only because I love the movie and he is the ring master of my favorite scene within its wonderfully corny walls.

A similar performance can be found in the 1990 biker gang comedy Masters of Menace. In it, he plays Sloppy Joe, a brain dead biker, to almost the same effect and charisma as Mountain. It is a completely unknown comedy; in fact I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who has ever seen it except me, which is odd considering it does feature such comedy greats as John Candy, Dan Aykroyd, and George Wendt. It’s still only available on VHS, and I doubt there are very many of those left. I won’t bother going into the details of the movie, all I will say is David Bowe stands out in a scene involving the biker gang drinking a punch containing Windex. They all have a group hallucination of a talking bear that gives advice about the meaning of life. The bear, voiced by Jim Belushi (he was funny once), tells Sloppy Joe that he is so stupid his best bet in life is to buy a thousand lottery tickets and cross his fingers. The end credits, freeze framing ala Animal House, lets us know that Sloppy Joe does just that, except he loses the winning ticket. It’s a funny movie, but it was lost to the banality of cable and VHS long ago.

Masters of Menace, along with his turn in Back to the Beach are two of the greatest examples of Bowe’s very adept ability to be, dare I say it, lovable and jolly. The only time he will surpass the comic timing and hilarity of playing Mountain and Sloppy Joe, is of course, two years post-Back to the Beach when he plays a character with the greatest name of all time.

Right here and now, my refusal to lay praise or review on UHF must be marked. I do not deny singing its pros because of disdain or hatred. The refutation only arises because having to say it’s amazing, in 2008, almost seems like an insult. It should be common knowledge, accepted as fact, and worshipped as unmitigated searing truth that it is genius. Etched into the granite supports underneath the stone table of film, pop, parody, and nostalgic history should be the three mighty letters, UHF!

This is not a review of UHF. This is not a review of UHF. This is…Sorry, I was typing to myself. Perhaps you may have noticed, I worship UHF, and I love Mr. Yankovic. Now, to hesitantly put that aside, the movie in question marks perhaps the most well-known performance by David Bowe. It would not be an act of idiocy to say that he might still be “THAT GUY FROM UHF” even on his deathbed. Unlike all of the other small to mid-size roles I have touted, this is most definitely a starring part. However, much to my dismay and probably Mr. Bowe’s, he can not be found on either the front or back of the DVD cover. No instead we see the only two thespians to have a somewhat A-list moment in the sun, Michael “Kramer” Richards and Fran “The Nanny” Drescher, post filming this box office flop. I understand why that is, but the guy was in the ENTIRE movie, we couldn’t even put his head popping up in the corner? Perhaps justice will better be served with a Blu-ray release, until then I guess we can at least be thankful they didn’t excommunicate his name from the credit listing.

David Bowe plays Bob, the slacker best friend of Weird Al’s George Newman. They both fall into the position of running a local UHF station that is rivaled by the evil Channel 8, located in the same town. Costello had Abbot, Lewis had Martin, R2-D2 had C-3PO, Jay had Silent Bob, and Weird Al most certainly had David Bowe. There is no doubt that he is the straight man of the pair, yet the odd dynamic is Weird Al plays the straight man to the majority of the other incredibly “zany” characters in the film. In a sense, they both play it straight just not in the same direction. Whether it be luck or skill, the casting of David Bowe as Weird Al’s other half works just right. Bowe has an extremely emotive forehead and brow, while Al has always had those great glaring eyes and elongated mouth working for him, so together they make one perfect comedic face.

Weird Al is, without a doubt, the star; it’s his movie. The character of Bob, however, is given plenty of room to bring the laughs, probably more prominently then in any other role he’s had. Take for example the small, but fan-favorite, scene in which Bob is describing the newfound success of Stanley Spadowski’s Clubhouse. As he starts talking to George, George beings throwing green grapes at him and Bob skillfully catches every one in his mouth. The beauty is that they never cut away; David Bowe catches a total of four grapes while delivering lines all in a single shot. It might seem very simple and small, but it takes some talent. It is done in a passive manner not served as a big moment, yet whenever anyone tries to catch food in their mouths it’s the first thing that pops into my head, and I’m sure the same goes for any other UHF fans out there. I believe on Weird Al’s extremely informative commentary track he explains that this was never in the script, David Bowe just happened to possess the random talent.

Early into the flick we get to the first taping of Uncle Nutzy’s Clubhouse, starring George as Uncle Nutzy and Bob as Bob-O the Clown. If you ask me, this is the single greatest moment in his on-screen career. In what might be one of, if not the, funniest moment in the entire movie, Bob comes out on stage dressed in the most generic clown get-up imaginable, talking only with the honks of a long cliché bike horn.

Uncle Nutzy instructs Bob-O to look up, then down, then at Mr. Frying Pan. Weird Al, dressed in a painfully tacky plaid suit, clocks David Bowe in the face with a cast iron frying pan. The beauty is that it’s done out of complete randomness, a type of humor that at the time I think was pretty unknown, but it’s rather embraced now in a world where Adult Swim flourishes. Now according, once again, to the commentary, Al actually hit him with the pan. It can’t be seen because of the red makeup and clown nose but Bowe is actually bleeding at that point.

The scene continues, Bob-O gets up, and Uncle Nutzy asks him if he’s hungry, causing David Bowe to reluctantly squeeze his horn with a sickly muffled honk of anger. Pitch perfect comedic interaction on Bowe’s part. Al then proceeds to feed Bob-O dog biscuits which of course are mistaken for butter cookies, prompting the clown to run off stage and vomit.

It can honestly be said that it’s this very scene that sparked my idea to write about David Bowe and hence, character acting in general. While watching UHF months ago, alone and around 4 a.m., I actually laughed out loud at that little honk he gives post-getting slammed in the face. That means a lot considering I have the movie memorized and was half-conscious due to lack of sleep.

David Bowe has had a long quality career, but not one in the spotlight whatsoever; as I hope I have shown. Thank you David Bowe for over 20 years of making me, at least, laugh. I hope anyone who has had the gumption to swash their way through my long winded tribute will come away with enough of a mental image of him to at least proclaim “HEY IT’S THAT GUY,” the next time you watch The Rock and notice David Bowe yelling at Nic Cage to stab himself in the heart with a syringe. It would be even better if you could bother to remember his name, but at this point I’m sure Bob-O the Clown will take what he can get.

Comments: 9 Comments

9 Responses to “Opinion In A Haystack – Hey, It’s That Guy!: Volume 1” gameon Says: April 15th, 2008 at 7:43 pm Seriously Bob…best column ever. -Ian opinioninahaystack Says: April 15th, 2008 at 9:14 pm wow. thanks ian. David "Bob-O the Clown"Bowe Says: April 15th, 2008 at 9:20 pm What can I say,I’m truly touched and honored by your kind words.I don’t know how I managed to be in so many “cult comedies” It just kind of happened that way.Thank you,by the way, for thanking me for doing such good work in what many consider a thankless job!I will definitely go down in cinematic history as “that guy from UHF” but I’m perfectly happy with that(as long as that all changes tomorrow when i book that awesome pilot that becomes that awesome series that lasts for ten years and stars David Bowe!)I’m very proud to be a working actor.I always figured that being a “character actor” wasn’t such a bad road to take.If I can have the kind of career that M Emmit Walsh has had I’ll die a happy camper!Some more Bowe bits that you may not know…I have had the most incredible luck launching the careers of 5 of our most successful filmmakers in Hollywood today. I have only appeared in 4 student(graduate)films.Those four students were very lucky indeed to have the services of one David Bowe.Perhaps you’ve heard of…Michael Bay, Jon Turtletoub, Sean Levy,J.J. Abrams & Matt Reeves. Thanx again for all the kind words, and just so you know, the honk you heard in Uncle Klutzy’s Playhouse was the honk I made that day, not some post production special effects house!Thats what you get when you hire a professional “Character Actor”! opinioninahaystack Says: April 16th, 2008 at 8:28 am you’re welcome? ScoundrelScream Says: April 16th, 2008 at 8:12 pm Quality column. And I didn’t know you knew David Bowe! opinioninahaystack Says: April 16th, 2008 at 11:54 pm Scoundrelscream…nor did I… pHitzy Says: April 17th, 2008 at 11:38 am Great column. I too adore UHF, and to see Mr. Bowe get this special treatment makes me feel warm inside. opinioninahaystack Says: April 18th, 2008 at 2:17 am thanks pHitzy! June Spearing Says: July 22nd, 2008 at 3:29 pm Hi, I think I saw David Bowe a few years ago working a gig at Disney World. I liked him so much, I even asked for his autograph. If I’m not mistaken, David was a magican or some kind of character in the Aladan exhibit/show. Am I right? Thanks, June in Boston Leave a Reply Name (required) Mail (will not be published) (required) Website Δ