Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

• It appears that combative, talent-less former talk show host Rosie O’Donnell isn’t done with The View just yet.  O’Donnell, who prematurely left the show last week after an on-air spat with her co-host, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, fired one last parting salvo.  In a statement released to the press, O’Donnell emphatically claims that she “will NEVER speak to Hasselbeck again,” but went on to note that she would still “totally eat her.” ** DISCLAIMER**  We here at QSE news would like to point out that the previous joke was in no way a lesbian joke.  We were simply pointing out the fact that Ms. O’Donnell is a big fat woman who likes to eat people. (Editor’s Note: Our news writer has a massive crush on Rosie)

• According to his daughter, Steven Tyler may be thinking about ditching Aerosmith. Liv Tyler has reportedly been telling people that her dad will leave the band “because he can’t take how the rest of the band is treating him.” Steven Tyler himself has said in recent weeks that no one, not even his band, realize how much he does and that it takes a great amount of talent to screech like a woman being stabbed with a badger and to tie neckerchiefs perfectly around a microphone stand.

• The company that produces Svedka Vodka has pulled out of sponsoring Lindsay Lohan’s upcoming 21st birthday party in Las Vegas.  The announcement comes less than 2 days after Lohan was arrested for allegedly driving under the influence and crashing her car.  Surprisingly, though, one high-ranking executive with Svedka maintains that the company has withdrawn its sponsorship from Lohan’s party not because of the arrest, but rather, because of the hundreds of calls and instant messages from a drunken Lohan demanding that the company buy her a new liver.

That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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