Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

• It won’t come as much of a surprise to most Americans, but Spider-Man 3 was number one at the box office this past weekend with a record setting three-day total of $148 million. Spider-Man 3 broke the record previously held by Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest. For those 23 people who have not seen Spider-Man 3, a van will be by shortly to take you to Spider-Man re-education camp.

• Actress Liv Tyler will play the role of Betty Ross in the upcoming Hulk sequel. Tyler will join Edward Norton, who has taken over the role of Bruce Banner. Tyler’s character will be responsible for making Banner turn into the Hulk by forcing him to listen to her father’s band, Aerosmith.

• It has been announced that a sequel to the film Wall Street is set to me made nearly 20 years after the first film was released.  The new film, called Money Never Sleeps, will feature Michael Douglas reprising his role of the infamous Gordon Gekko.  To get back into the character, Douglas has accepted positions with Enron, Tyco, WorldCom, Adelphia, Halliburton…

• Finally, and in continued movie news, actor Sacha Baron Cohen will play Freddy Mercury in an upcoming biopic about the Queen frontman. Cohen himself is fresh off his breakthrough performance as Borat. Cohen is expected to play the role more seriously than his last several films by working in only one or two high fives.

That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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