Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

• Representatives for the estate of former Queen singer Freddie Mercury have sent a cease and desist order to NECA toys, barring the release of a new Mercury action figure.  According to the order, the figure was never approved and is therefore unauthorized.  When asked for comment about what was wrong with the figure, an insider stated that the toy “just didn’t have that certain, what’s the word, happiness?  No, that’s not the word…”

• John Popper, lead singer/harmonica player for Blues Traveler, was arrested after Washington State Patrol clocked him going 111 mph in his Mercedes SUV. After searching the vehicle, officers found a large supply of weapons and a small amount of marijuana. When asked about the drugs, Popper stated that it’s “medicinal” and part of his weight loss plan.  When quizzed about the weapons, Popper responded simply, “This isn’t over, Dave Matthews. You know what you did and I’m coming for you.”

• Disney announced yesterday that production has begun at Pixar on Toy Story 3.  Michael Arndt, who just won an Academy Award for his screenplay to Little Miss Sunshine, is penning the script.  According to Arndt, his “totally original” story is going to center on “Woody and Buzz heading to California so Buzz can be in a talent show.  However, along the way, Woody dies, right?  He ODs or something. So they have to tape him to the back of that little [EXPLETIVE DELETED] car with eyes and drive around with him.”

• Three hundred fans of pop singer Michael Jackson paid $3,400 each in order to hang out with the reclusive superstar for one special night in Japan.  During the engagement, Jackson talked to the fans and took pictures, but did not sing or dance.  Insiders report that Jackson refused to do any of his “A” material when he found out the event had a 16 and over age limit.

That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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