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By Christopher Stipp

April 9th, 2004

$39,167

$39,167 is what SHAOLIN SOCCER made last week in its debut across America. Was it that bad? Was it so unwatchable that people chose weeks old offerings like DIRTY DANCING: HAVANA NIGHTS and SOMETHING’S GOTTA GIVE (which is out already on DVD) because it sucked so bad? No.

SHAOLIN SOCCER debuted at six theaters across the country. Limited release would a humorous understatement.

Six theaters decided it was worth showing and you know what they found in return? Without waiting for your refrain I’ll tell you that SHAOLIN SOCCER earned a better per screen average than THE PRINCE AND ME, WALKING TALL and most every other movie in the top fifteen at the box office. HELLBOY beat it, barely, and I am glad for the six theaters that were able to get people to come out and see it. It’s nice to see a movie supported in such a fashion. If you were to multiply the number out, factoring in an average wide release and compensate for weak markets, the figure would have a financially impressive dollar amount. Of course, would it play well Boones Farm, Iowa? Maybe not, but it did well enough to send a message, however loud forty grand can be, and I hope when HERO comes out, if ever, that it doesn’t suffer the fate of a six screen debut. It deserves better. (End of rant)

Zach Braff has made a name for himself by playing Dr. Dorian on Scrubs but his new movie, GARDEN STATE, which he wrote and directed, did some great word-of-mouth buzz during Sundance this year. The reviews were very kind as it looked like television’s affable young doctor had something else brewing under that wide smile and gentle good looks. The trailer looks great, and it gets double points for having Natalie Portman prominently displayed, and serves as a perfect calling card for others who wonder if a movie like this is worth their time. It goes without saying that it’s the clip of the week but I’ll say it anyway: it’s the clip of the week. Enjoy with my compliments and here’s to hoping Scrubs can make it through season five; syndication’s never always a good thing, but it would be for them. Just as long as Fonzie doesn’t decide to use his motorcycle to make a dashing leap over a fish tank with a motorcycle we will all be fine.

MR. 3000 (2004)

Director: Charles Stone
Cast: Bernie Mac, Angela Bassett, Evan Jones, Chris Noth, Michael Rispoli, Paul Sorvino, Brian White
Release: September 24, 2004
Synopsis: Seven years ago, a vain and jaded baseball star (Bernie Mac) retired from the sport as soon as achieving his 3,000th base hit, and his place within the select group who have achieved that distinction. Now, however, after three of those hits during his time with the Milwaukee Brewers have been disqualified, the Hall of Famer returns to the game, playing once again for the Brewers, to play a few more games and get back to the 3,000 mark, but along the way, he discovers that the experience renews his love for the sport, reminding him what it was like to be a young boy obsessed with a simple game involving sticks, balls and running in a circle, as he finds himself imparting some of this knowledge to a young rookie he mentors.

View Trailer:
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Progonosis: Positive.

There is an argument that could be made that Bernie Mac’s recent film career with bit parts in movies like BAD SANTA, HEAD OF STATE, and CHARLIE’S ANGELS is simply representative of a comedian who has done well and is now being exploited until his usefulness runs out.

He has a successful television show, he has the sequel to OCEAN’S ELEVEN coming up later this year and has this headlining gig in a new film directed by the man who brought us DRUMLINE, PAID IN FULL and all those zany, crazy, wacky Budweiser commercials where everyone says “whassup”or a similarly themed question.

Watching this trailer, and knowing who made the movie, I am curious to know who the demographic is that this film should appeal to. My knee jerk reaction to what the beginning of this trailer feels like? Rod Tidwell Redux. You have the attitude, the pubic persona of a man who doesn’t answer to anyone and, most interestingly, someone who performs in low-rent commercials. In an era when Mark Grace, one of the best to recently retire from the big leagues, is doing commercials on my television screen for a local auto dealership the trailer hits close to home in a very amusing way.

This is a great vehicle for Mac and I’ll tell you why: it accentuates his already developed character in the mainstream media. He comes off like kind of a codger, a disgruntled older man, but also possesses a delicately hidden sweet spot that gets some air every now and then.

Angela Bassett, who has been M.I.A. since last year’s MASKED AND ANONYMOUS (and, hell, who wouldn’t be after that extremely slow burning paper bag of dog crap?) has some good screen time here and makes me long for more films with her in it.

The music? Probably the one thing that gets me angrier than anything else concerning this trailer has to be the use of K7’s “Come Baby Come” and 2 Unlimited’s “Get Ready For This.”

Stop it. All of you. Techno music does not age like fine wine. It decomposes like a small sample of uranium. Its half-life expired in 1994. I’ll say it slow like I would tell my dog: Cut it the hell out. I get it already. You want to make the music fit the trailer in the same way that NPR matches lead outs with witty selections that reflect the story they just discussed. What trailer makers need is a little lesson in what makes witty and what makes wit-less. It’s a shame because this is actually a fairly amusing trailer.

Even though I have some reservations about the movie because of the genre, the sports film, and the time it wasted by making a Tom Arnold/Roseanne joke, I at least have some positive feelings towards a picture I would otherwise make an effort to miss.

GREY DOG (2004)

Director: Justin Viar
Cast: Scott Kennedy, Catherine Barlow, Greggory Williams, Matt Miller, Rosh, Robin Heath
Release: Coming Soon
Synopsis: When you spend most of your life in prison, getting out is a big day. For Deke, Karl and Dubdub, this is the day. Adjusting to the outside world proves to be more complicated than they thought. The long bus ride home shows them who they were, who they are and who they will be.

View Trailer:
* Large (Windows Media)

Progonosis: Positive.

The opening sequence, with the exception of the guy who looks like a blonde Carrot Top with a red trucker’s hat beating the snot of someone or something, is wonderfully shot. It has a little slo-mo, some exposition, and a little character setup. Perfect. There are some blocking of the characters that seems a little forced and not natural but it can be forgiven.

Then the supports come onscreen. Based on the description of the film I am to suppose that things take place in one day and judging by the trailer it seems that way. Before any dialogue comes in to play there is a rather interesting choice for music. A little fuzz pedal, classic rock, keyboard infusion captures the right mood in what this movie seems to be about before transitioning, effortlessly, into a little showcasing into the abilities of the writer.

Some of the dialogue felt, just like some of the movements of the principal characters, a little stilted. With snippets like “the world is our oyster,” while not that bad in the grandiose presentation of the film itself, is easily looked over when focusing on how well the movie seems to be directed. Did the best bits make it into the trailer? Did only the most effective scenes get spliced in? I don’t think so. If some of the larger, more fleshed out pieces, of the film are presented in the same fashion as this trailer I have no doubt this would be one of the better indie films out there.

I could be wrong, though.

How many times have you seen something where the director simply wants to make a film where the statement overrides the story or there’s a moment in the movie where characters have grandiose monologues that feel so out of place? A few times I’m sure. This film looks to make a statement but the direction feels so warm and inviting that I’m not at all skittish about wanting to watch the film in its entirety to find out.

This trailer is a cool refreshment in a general population of otherwise visually loud and distracting trailers. There seems to be real heart here, realizing no one sets out to make a bad movie, with the exception of the people at Troma Studios, but there needs to be something behind that delicate need to have a movie understood and accepted as a welcome addition into the canon of film. The trailer for GREY DOG makes me want to see the foibles, mistakes, missteps because there is something there, intangible, that is worth a look if nothing else.

DE-LOVELY (2003)

Director: Irwin Winkler
Cast: Kevin Kline, Ashley Judd, Natalie Cole, Sheryl Crow, Mario Frangoulis, Mick Hucknall, Alanis Morissette, Jonathan Pryce, Elvis Costello, Lara Fabian, Vivian Green, Diana Krall, Robbie Williams
Release: June 25, 2004 (limited)
Synopsis: De-lovely is an original musical portrait of American composer Cole Porter, filled with his unforgettable songs. In the film, Porter is looking back on his life as if it was one of his spectacular stage shows, with the people and events of his life becoming the actors and action onstage. Through elaborate production numbers and legendary hits like “Anything Goes,” “It’s De-lovely,” and “Night and Day,” Porter’s elegant, excessive past comes to light – including his deeply complicated relationship with his wife and muse, Linda Lee Porter. Directed by Academy Award(r)-winner Irwin Winkler from a script by Jay Cocks and starring Oscar(r)-winner Kevin Kline, Ashley Judd, and Jonathan Pryce in addition to some of today’s biggest rock and pop music stars, De-lovely is a sparkling celebration of Porter’s music as well as a stirring exploration of the artist’s journey and the undying power of love.

View Trailer:
* Various (Windows Media, RealOne)

Progonosis: Positive.

While I’m not sure this will change the perception of most, this clip shows that there might be more than crying, running away from homicidal ex-husbands, and pandering to the camera, to Ashley Judd’s movie career.

Like many, I had high hopes after seeing HEAT. She was positively splendid in her ability to affect the emotions of a wife who has been though it all and still manages to scrape together a semblance of stability in her life. She was angry, sad, lonely, but, at the very end, when she gives a cue to a bullet-holed Val from a balcony for him to stay away for fear of arrest, it was believable and tender. I dare you, nay, I ask you to tell me what she has done that has matched that performance. I can see KISS THE GIRLS as coming close as that’s the movie that started the whole serial murder/killing your husband/doesn’t-Farrah-Faucet-have-a-monopoly-on-this-genre downslide for her. What she does in this trailer is to reign in that over-acting that made her so infamous and looks to take a more relaxed, natural approach to this role. She looks every bit like a million bucks, playing the romantic interest in one of history’s greatest music men, Cole Porter.

Kevin Kline is in the actor’s suit for ol’ Cole and he looks every bit the part. With knowing exactly zero about the man I can safely assert that Kline has the kind of charisma that, if not indicative of Porter himself, is endearing nonetheless to this role. He is very smooth, graceful and exudes the kind of confidence in a role I hadn’t seen since ICE STORM. There are moments here, short bursts really, of genuine tenderness and it works to Kline’s favor. The things and people around him only elevate the appearance of a solid movie. He simply glides through this trailer and is every bit the showman that he is supposed to be embodying. However, he is not the only one.

The preponderance of some of music’s golden children are of some importance to note here. There are guest stars in this film. What begins to shake my confidence in this picture, however, is the inclusion of Alanis Morissette, Diana Krall, Elvis Costello, Sheryl Crow, Robbie Williams, and Natalie Cole seem to me like another episode of American Dreams, not a motion picture. It was jarring to see them included here and it is my hope that they do not take attention away from the narrative like some gnat that’s attracted to the funk of sweaty pits.

However, Jonathan Price, one of the most underrated actors working today, is in it and he looks to have a wonderful supporting role GLENGARRY GLEN ROSS was one of his most powerful, yet short, appearances and he has the kind of power that a fistful of dynamite has when it is squeezed into tightly packed rocks. Maybe he can act as a countermeasure to the glaring attraction that the musical guests will certainly get.

Also, and I know it may be irrelevant, but since this only Irvin Winkler’s sixth time out as a director, his past exploits including LIFE AS A HOUSE, AT FIRST SIGHT and THE NET, but he has yet to really bring a picture to life in a vibrant way. He is ambitious to develop a sincere, meaningful story and let’s hope that six time’s a charm.

IMAGINING ARGENTINA (2004)

Director: Christopher Hampton
Cast: Antonio Banderas, Emma Thompson, Horacio Flash
Release: April 23 (UK)
Synopsis: Set in 1970’s Argentina Carlos Rueda (Antonio Banderas) is the director of a children’s theatre in Buenos Aires, a city haunted by the continual disappearance of individuals who dare to speak out against the brutal dictatorship. When his wife Cecelia (Emma Thompson) who is a successful journalist begins to write a controversial article in the local news paper she too disappears. Deeply distraught by the turn events Carlos along with his daughter Teresa (Leticia Dolera) sets out to discover what happened to his beloved wife.

View Trailer:
* Small (Windows Media)

Progonosis: Positive.

Emma Thompson.

The first movie I saw with Emma was MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING. In terms of Shakespearian adaptations it still ranks in the top five productions I’ve ever seen. From Denzel to Keaton to Branagh and, yes, even Keanu it was pure inspiration to watch. Even now, as Emma chooses roles like someone scanning a box of chocolates, seeming to get the creamy caramel ones by accident, there is something in the roles she chooses that still gives me hope there is an actor out there who really wants to be relevant but sees little need, with the exception of a few JUNIOR’s, with churning out crap. Emma was wonderful in Angels in America, Wit and she looks to step on the precipice, again, of getting involved with a big Hollywood affair by adding some class to things. This trailer, and movie, starting off in 1976, begins with Emma being taken hostage. If there were a more perfect person to be cast in this role please let them speak now. Emma, throughout this clip, displays the steely resolve that make her the one person who could play someone like this without giving the role a false sheen.

Oddly enough, Antionio Banderas makes an appearance in this film and I am not ashamed to admit he looks great. He simply looks great. He doesn’t have locks of hair draping into his face that he has to put into a scrunchie for ONCE UPON A TIME IN MEXICO, he doesn’t have the Soul Glo look from FEMME FATALE that did not endear himself to any kind of sympathy and he sure as hell doesn’t have the smarmy attitude I grew to loathe in the SPY KIDS series. He looks natural in this trailer and that is a very good thing. There was a reason he was put into films and this makes him semi-presentable as someone who should be taken seriously and not derided for his silliness.

Black screen, white letters: 30,000 tortured and murdered. What a great way to establish some feeling of danger and suspense. Spliced with some file footage this period piece is all about capturing mood and, as the trailer progresses, it does it with subdued flair and panache. Antonio is afflicted with the kind of odd, mental ability to “tap into” the things around him. He has visions and he cannot control what he sees, blah, blah, blah. This might be something that could turn the film into kind of fluff, but Antonio brings things up to a respectable level and he makes me believe that he could possibly rise above the gimmick.

With no date slated, domestically, for this picture to arrive here in the States it would be of interest to me to see how the rest of the world reacts to a super-powered Antonio trying to solve the crime of a missing Emma Thompson. If Emma is bringing the same dramatic personae from her work as of late, Antonio could die in a fire of bullets for I care as long as she makes it out alive.

GARDEN STATE (2004)

Director: Zach Braff
Cast: Zach Braff, Natalie Portman, Peter Sarsgaard, Ian Holm
Release: July 30th
Synopsis: When Andrew Largeman (Zach Braff) returns to his hometown for his mother’s funeral, he reconnects with old friends and – since he’s gone off his depression medication – himself. A chance meeting with Sam (Natalie Portman), who also suffering from various maladies, opens his world to the possibility of rekindling emotional attachments, confronting his psychologist father, and perhaps beginning a new life.

View Trailer:
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* Medium (QuickTime)

* Large (Quick Time)


Progonosis: Positive.

Hey, isn’t that the movie from the guy who’s in that show that used to be on Thursday and now is on Tuesday?

Simply based on the trailer Zach Braff is going to be someone, much like the always affable and stalwart George Clooney, who will find actual success beyond NBC’s clutches. Yes, Jennifer Aniston was simply perfect in OFFICE SPACE and even THE GOOD GIRL, but c’mon, how you can compare those to OCEAN’S 11, CONFESSIONS OF A DANGEROUS MIND, and OUT OF SIGHT. Garden State looks like a movie that will, hopefully, allow Braff to be seen beyond his role as a comedic punch line in a great situational comedy.

When this trailer opens, mood and engagement with the viewer is instantaneously established. With oxygen masks rocking back and forth in a symphonic slow dance it is a wonderful image. As DIE HARD 2 and even TWILIGHT ZONE: THE MOVIE was quick to point out, you can never go wrong with certain doom aboard an aircraft and it’s employed well here. The verisimilitude inside the troubled plane, whether it is a figment a la FIGHT CLUB, or real, like CON AIR for example, interspersing this image with the very personal moment that go along with someone sliding down a slope of personal tragedy (was that a symbol I heard?) that the subsequent image of a funeral conveys was a great thing to pack in the front end of this trailer.

And then we come upon, but not directly, of course, Natalie Portman. To be honest, I wasn’t a fan of how she looked in THE PROFESSIONAL. I thought she was rock solid in the part but I thought her career was pretty much going to be stopped dead from the very non-descript facial features and incessant bawling that was happening on screen. It wasn’t until I was mauled by the likes of Dakota Fanning and her cutesy ilk that showed me how great she was and now is. GARDEN STATE only looks to solidify her place as a true, professional actress who is still making the transition of child star to full-fledged actress. There are some evocative shots of every emotion she musters so well, whether that be her smiling, crying or standing aloof. And that’s one of the things that prevalent in this trailer: the friends here seem close yet quite distant from not only each other but from the camera. The shots chosen show some of that even in the scenes where they are not present.

As this thing is taking the decent to the credits, it kicks things into overdrive (with a great choice of music from Frou Frou ) with perfect selections of the various characters and the situations contain therein. I also believe it is my duty to say there is a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it shot of a guy shooting a flaming arrow; as some of you know I might as well get my ticket now simply based on that. What is also of interest to me, and to report, is the inclusion of the accolades Braff received from advance screenings of this movie.

If it was anyone else, I might object to that. Screw what people think, I say, and put your art out there, be judged, and feel confident. Alas, the side of me that is concerned with the ever shrinking marketplace for films like this realizes this might actually let people know this is a “safer” bet if they read some other people like it so they can feel safe blowing their entertainment dollar on this one. Just like a dust jacket of an unknown book that needs some love, so too does GARDEN STATE.

It’s not dour enough to look depressing and it’s warm enough to feel like it’s something you can curl up to. That’s a lock in my book.

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