By Christopher Stipp
March 26, 2004
Hero for Hero
Another week, another set of four trailers to read.
Yes, only four as you people are going to step in and offer some advice to some up-and-coming auteurs of cinema. There was some good response to the request for filmmakers who needed some exposure to their projects. When you watch these you can easily feel the work that went into making them and I am happy, at the very least, to offer a soap box to stand on and be judged on their trailers. Obviously, the trailers are but a sliver of the entire completed project but this is what sells a film and everyone needs your help in giving feedback about what works, what doesn’t and what could be better. This week’s independent film, NEW WORLD, looks to tackle the sci-fi genre and that’s something you don’t see that often compared to the deep, heady pictures that feel the need to capture the zeitgeist of an era. This is refreshing. Much in the same way that Red vs. Blue is parodying the Halo franchise this series looks to keep adding new chapters in its continuum. So, toss some words back at me and next week I’ll give the consensus for everyone’s reaction.
So, before I silence myself and shut my mouth for another week, I would like to say how pleased I am that DAWN OF THE DEAD, one of the very first trailers I reviewed for this site, slammed Jesus into the turnbuckle at the box office. It’s good to know that this genre isn’t completely out of steam and out of favor with the rest of the general populace. I have yet to see it but from what I hear, even from Romero blowhards, DAWN is simply a very good film. When a good 75 to 80 percent of schlock out at the multiplex is unsatisfying pap it makes the horror fan in me happy, if for a little while, that there could more undead on the way.
This week HERO makes my favorite trailer of the week as early word has some very high powered help assisting this film from the Pacific make its big screen debut here in the United States. Never mind it’s been a disgracefully long time since Miramax has been sitting on this diamond and once you see the trailer you see why it deserves a little love from a positive audience. I would say more but I’ll save it for the ring.
Director: Peter John Ross
Cast: George Caleodis, Fritz Cargould, Milan A. Cargould, Kevin Carr, Glen Littlejohn, John Mader, Jon Osbeck, Dovie Pettitt, Ryan Stefano
Release: Currently Playing
Synopsis: New World brings high adventure and special FX to a short series of internet movies. Focusing on a time on Earth after aliens have invaded, a group a young upstarts begin to fight back against the insect-like Invaders.
View Trailer:
* Small (QuickTime)
Director: Keenen Ivory Wayans
Cast: Marlon Wayans, Shawn Wayans, Rochelle Aytes, Jennifer Carpenter, Jessica Cauffiel, Faune Chambers, Terry Crews, Brittany Daniel, Anne Dudek, James King, Lochlyn Munro
Release: June 25, 2004
Synopsis: Shawn and Marlon Wayans play two FBI agents trying to get back into their boss’s good graces by taking on a job guarding the Wilton sisters, two New York City hotel heiresses, from a serial kidnapper. They fail, and the two women are abducted. Then the two agents go undercover, dressing up as the titular “white chicks” to solve the crime and rescue the victims.
View Trailer:
* Various (Windows Media, RealOne)
Progonosis: Negative.
Ok. It’s a movie where two guys pass themselves off as two white ladies. Instantly, I am reminded of Lenny Henry who tried this almost same bit way back in 1991 with TRUE IDENTITY. If I remember correctly he had about as much success with that film as this one looks to enjoy. I am confused as to why the Wayans brothers decided to pitch this idea and what they said to the right suit who greenlit this turkey.
I love the beginning of this trailer, though. We have the Wayans brothers knocking shit over as cops, making busts, getting talked to by their superior officers and I feel hopeful at this point. In fact, I was hoping they would take over the whole Martin/Smith buddy cop genre with something fresh. This is when the trailer descends into a mess of hell.
One question: in the obligatory scene whenever a man dresses as a woman, and a purse snatcher, who is dressed here in a hackneyed grey sweatshirt and grey cap in what looks like to be a very warm time of year, grabs their purse is there a way to just fast forward through the old and busted tenet that the guy always catches up with him and beats him up? It was pure evil to watch.
The rest of the trailer simply plays up the obvious: a straight guy gets attracted to one of the “girls†and the men display traits usually only circumscribed to male gender roles. Wonderful.
Many of you know I am about as fair as a Wimbledon line judge when it comes to these trailers. I’ve admitted my penchant for all things flaming and explosive (arrows and glass included) but also having a sweet spot for good, affective cinema. However, what the hell is this supposed to be?
I referenced TRUE IDENTITY, not only to its obvious aping of the whole turning a black guy into a white guy, lord knows C. Thomas Howell did it with cringing aplomb (I would still like to offer my apologies to the world for that burning sack of dog crap) and it hasn’t been done since, but what irks me is that TRUE IDENTITY’s whole gimmick was a black guy putting on, for lack of a better description, white face and acting like a “white†person. It got old quick and it never seemed to rise above the one gag. Eddie Murphy, however, back when he was still funny, did it with razor sharp hilariousness back in the eighties because it was only a sketch that lasted a few minutes. Quick, short, and effective. This gag in WHITE GIRLS will lose its steam in the first act. The fact that Keenan is at the directorial helm, though, helps me sleep better at night and I’ll tell you why.
Keenen had no part in writing any of the SCARY MOVIE movies; that’s salvo number one. He did, however, scribe MOST WANTED and a LOW DOWN DIRTY SHAME.
Keenen created IN LIVING COLOR, giving rise to some of the best talent in comedy today, and made I’M GONNA GIT YOU SUCKA. The latter gave the world one of the best bits of hilarity that involved Chris Rock, one rib, and a wad of bills.
I can’t really endorse seeing this film from what I saw but I would genuinely be happy if I were to be wrong about where I see this movie headed.
Director: Jeff Nathanson
Cast: Matthew Broderick, Alec Baldwin, W. Earl Brown, Toni Collette, Calista Flockhart, Judy Greer, William H. Macy, Tim Blake Nelson, Rob Schneider, Tony Shalhoub
Release: TBA
Synopsis: The focus of this ensemble comedy is a struggling filmmaker whose dream of directing his script by working outside the traditional Hollywood system comes true (as long as he films in Providence, Rhode Island) until he discovers that his miracle producer (Baldwin) is actually an undercover FBI agent who is just using the production as part of a sting operation designed to connect reports of union manipulation with the mafia.
View Trailer:
* Small (QuickTime)
Progonosis: Comfortably Positive As soon as this trailer starts, I know I’ve heard this one before.
It had been some time but I knew where the plot was going, almost like déjà vu, and I stopped watching the trailer to investigate. It took only a few sparks of intuition and some clicking before I realized it was on NPR; specifically, it was episode 244 of This American Life. The real story was about a movie producer who sets out to make a movie under the supervision of a not too convincing FBI agent who tries to pass himself as a Hollywood mogul in an attempt to uncover mob corruption without letting the producer in on the sting. I don’t want to give the whole story away but it is an utterly fascinating twenty-five minutes of radio theater. This, however, brings us back to the trailer.
As it starts up again, I quickly see where the real story ends and the liberal stretching of the truth begins, the trailer is good and quick about setting the movie premise up. It captures the silliness of the whole teamsters/bribing/sting/informant angle and plays it for laughs; it could have gone either way.
It was nice to see Matthew Broderick in a major film role since his delicately played persona in YOU CAN COUNT ON ME and he’s wonderful to watch playing the part of the rube who has no idea what he’s involved in. I think if there’s one thing that saves this trailer from being an average, ho-hum affair is the focus on Broderick’s oafishness as he tries to navigate a very strange situation. There are great bits of Alec and Matthew playing serious comedy and it overrides a very annoying, pestering voiceover that gets in the way of my enjoyment.
Por ejemplo, Broderick asks Baldwin if his wife is also in the business; that business to which he’s referring, of course, is the move making industry. Baldwin, oblivious and with a straight face, replies: “Why would I marry a whore?”
Love it. That’s comedy gold in them thar trailer, son.
Also, I’m confused as to the inclusion of Peter Gabriel’s “Big Time.†Ooo….how witty of you marketing magnates. Was Flock of Seagulls demanding too much for “I Ran†or was there another eighties classic that you couldn’t afford to swing in your marketing budget? Like I pointed out above, the voice of God as he does his voiceover is distracting as is the amateur look of the fonts used to tell me who’s who in the film and that, even though I heard you the first time, it really is based on a true story. Jeff Nathanson is the first time director on this project and is credited as helping to pen the adaptation to the screen. For those not in the know Nathanson is also credited for brining ANOTHER based on a true story to life in the shape of CATCH ME IF YOU CAN.
P.s. – Toni Collette is in full frontal black underwear showing off her acting acumen, but since that appeals to the juvenile in me they get an A for effort.
Director: Michael Lembeck
Cast: Nia Vardalos, Toni Collette, Stephen Spinella, Dash Mihok, David Duchovny
Release: April 16, 2004
Synopsis: Vardalos and Collette play Connie and Carla, two struggling Chicago dinner theater performers who accidentally witness a mafia hit…and who subsequently hit the road, running for their lives. Assuming the killers will never look for them in a place devoid of culture, the pair head to Los Angeles, where they assume new identities and find their middling talent at song and dance perfectly suited to new careers—as drag queens. Much to their surprise, they inadvertently become the toast of the cabaret circuit. As their ruse becomes increasingly difficult to maintain, they discover that it is indeed lonely at the top, especially after Connie meets Jeff (Duchovny), a guy she’d really like to be a real girl with. With the mafia zeroing in and the line separating their onstage/offstage personas blurring beyond the point of recognition, Connie and Carla soon discover the power of not compromising to pursue your dreams, fighting the good fight and never, never underestimating the transformative power of cosmetics.
View Trailer:
* Small (Windows Media, Quick Time, RealOne)
* Small (Quick Time)
* Medium (Quick Time)
* Large (Quick Time)
Progonosis: This is a MUST SEE for every woman out there and a reason for every man to decry the rom com genre. You can immediately taste the blend of this mess right from the word go.
It starts out having a little bit of HEDWIG, adds a little a brain-dead best friend vibe from ROMY AND MICHELE’S HIGH SCHOOL REUNINION, has a pinch of HARD TO KILL, offers some elements of Bosom Buddies in reverse, apes from SISTER ACT and then adds a little David Duchovny seriousness into it all.
I’m a sensitive guy. I appreciate a good David Duchovny love story. I happily own RETURN TO ME and can appreciate a middle-of-the-road love story for what it is. This, however, looks muddled and I am confused on what the most important element of the plot is supposed to be. Right away, though, I already know a few things:
1. Connie and Carla do not die as a result of their “on the lam†status from the mob. There will be no chance in hell of that happening and so that immediately takes the suspense out of that plot thread. It would be nice if one of them happens to meet her demise by the end of the movie by having a Columbian necktie administered but having that ending would be tantamount to having Wile E. Coyote catching and eating the soft flesh of the Road Runner. It would throw the world off its axis.
2. David Duchovny will most likely get pissed when he finds out his love interest is really a lady and not a dude and why the hell couldn’t she have been honest, but will eventually love her anyway because she’s, like, a really amazing person, et al.
3. Connie and Carla will be best friends 4 ever. No matter what this movie says to you, or will have you believe, no matter how many red herrings are tossed in the other direction, they will be best friends by the time the film hits the last scene of the last reel.
Now, knowing all this, and knowing full where it is all going, will some of the ladies still drag your ass to see this? You bet they’re gonna try. When you piece together the elements that pervade this trailer so heavily, from the lackadaisical direction, inane plot and substandard acting there is a thin, silver lining. It comes in the form of Toni Collette and David Duchovny.
The two of them are good actors. Toni was absolutely splendid in JAPANESE STORY and David, from what I hear, brought it to the table every week when he was still on the X-Files. Nia Vardolos, apart from her really nice sounding name, has no currency with me. MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING was a nice movie the first time I saw it. She was good. I am anxious to know, however, if she can break out of the role of the Greek girl next door but this looks like a safe role choice for her and it feels like MY BIG FAT REDUX when I see her doing her shtick.
Director: Zhang Yimou
Cast: Jet Li, Tony Leung Chiu-Wai, Maggie Cheung Man-Yuk, Zhang Ziyi, Chen Dao Ming, Donnie Yen
Release: June 4, 2004 (limited)
Synopsis: In ancient times China was divided into seven kingdoms. Qin, the king of the northern province, is under permanent threat of assassination attempts. His greatest fears are the warriors Broken Sword (Leung Chiu Wai), Flying Snow (Cheung), and Sky (Yen). One day one of the magistrates (Li) of his kingdom enters the palace, claims that he defeated all three of the emperor’s adversaries and tells his story; how he beat “Sky” in a duel and used the love between “Broken Sword” and “Flying Snow” to subdue them.
View Trailer:
* Small (QuickTime)
Progonosis: Daaamn.
Before any of us knew how to differentiate between good and bad movies there was just something unexplainable, truly magical, if you will allow me to be so loose with my adverbial phraseology, about the ones that stay with you regardless of their quality.
Something I noticed immediately upon watching HERO was its ability to transcend language and offer up a story, while wonderfully intricate, didn’t really need words; the movie, and its players, was operatic. But that’s not the point here. This is about the trailer.
There is a vast disconnect between the foreign language trailer and the one that has been cobbled together for the domestic release. The most glaring difference between the two is that the foreign language trailer uses, well, language to sell its film while the one for English speaking folk get a lot of the action as a substitute for exposition. That’s not to say one is better than the other, however. For many campaigns of foreign language films, WITH A FRIEND LIKE HARRY comes to mind immediately, the trailer is all action with none of the cast speaking a bit of their foreign tongue. Having a blend of both language and imagery worked well for a trailer like GOOD BYE, LENIN!, but it doesn’t fare well for the subtitled one offered up here.
There could be a pissing match for days about what seems to be the most dominant element that needs to be accentuated in order to sell this to a domestic audience. Whether that be the story (nothing matters more), the visuals (an easy lock for the late teen/early adult demographic) or to try and tout the star power of Li, Leung and Ziyi (most would say “who?â€) there are a lot of options to effectively sell this to ma and pa America. While the foreign language trailer focuses on the intimate connections between the characters, there is something there at the very end that I wish, terribly so, in fact, was in the domestic trailer. Near the very end there is a shot of an army releasing a cavalcade of arrows (not one on fire, dammit). It’s beautiful. The use of black and grey is breathtaking as they take flight. And then, there he is, Jet Li. We only see his back, the shower descending downward toward him, as he stands steadfast and still. That’s a keeper.
The domestic trailer is no slouch, however. It showcases only a sliver of the action that’s contained in this epic and does a very good job in doing so. One of the things that really captured my attention is its focus on Yimou’s direction. There are wide, sweeping views interlaced with the emotions of the movie’s characters. There are wide shots interspersed with tight ones, action mixed with slow motion and a voiceover that assists, not hinders, the progression of the trailer.
Miramax has been sitting on this movie for a long time and, simply based on the look of both these trailers, I am positive there should be a collective “why?†being uttered when the screen goes black. There simply isn’t a better looking import that hasn’t yet been released in the States than HERO. From what I have read, however, Quentin Tarantino is getting involved with getting this movie out and uncut. It’s a disgrace to any filmmaker to have their vision conform to an individual’s taste and this is but one example of there being hope for at least one movie that can have a stay of execution.
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