Author: UncaScroogeMcD

WAKEFIELD, NC – Deep in the woods of Raleigh, I felt the ghost of Glenn Gould. He’s been dead since 1982, but there he was at a grand piano playing the first of Bach’s The Goldberg Variations.

His body wasn’t hunched over the keyboard on his collapsible chair. He wasn’t humming away as he played. But it was unmistakably Gould. The keys of the Yamaha DCFIIIAPRO were stuck in his iconic way. His music filled the classical music concert hall covered in maple and cherry wood.

How can this be? Who conjured the Canadian classical music genius? Zenph Sound Innovations figured a way to make dead fingers play. This isn’t merely a piano roll, fake stereo treatment or a new noise reduction that goes beyond Dolby.

There is no other way to describe the technological miracle except in spiritual terms. This is the closest we’ll ever get to truly experience Gould without Zenph inventing a time machine. Dr. John Q. Walker and his team developed a program that can take a sound recording, isolate the various instruments, accurately determine the notes and timing and put them through a Yamaha piano with the ability to exactly play the recorded notes with the proper timing and inflection.

This isn’t like that rickety player piano they had at Shakey’s Pizza. It’s not just playing notes like your elderly music teacher insisted. This computerized system replicates the emotion found in the art. It revives the nuance, the timing, the sorrow and the joy given the music by the original musician. If this isn’t quite making sense, here’s a little video about the magic they are doing in the concert hall that’s part of Walker’s house.

Does that help you grasp what Zenph is about? And what an amazing concert space. When we went from his kitchen into the music room, it was like roaming around the TARDIS.

Walker introduced Art Tatum’s as his next “guest.” During the song, the piano gave itself thundering key slaps as if a hand whacked them. Tatum’s music goes beyond the piano when his playing gets transferred into a techno dance song. The thing is that after several hours of the artist’s work is digitized into the computer, the program can decipher the artist’s style. This allows the computer to determine how they’d play a new piece of music. How do you think Glenn Gould would play Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance?” The answer might be coming. Zenph allows the artist lives through his art and stakes a claim to the present. Someday Sun Ra might return from Saturn with Zenph as his co-pilot.

The biggest thing they’re doing now is letting the artist reclaim his past. When Sergei Rachmanioff recorded in 1921, he wasn’t captured with an electric microphone. They used a horn and recorded directly onto the master disc. It was a very primitive process with barely any audio dynamics. Zenph was able to take this limited resource to allow the piano to truly play what Rachmanioff’s hands touched that day nearly 80 years ago. Instead of making excuses and accepting limitations, the robot piano gave us the majesty of the Master. The quiet passages are no longer buried under the crackle of a 78 shellac. The beauty shines. A strange bi-product of the process is the computer creates accurate sheet music. Zenph discovered that Rachmanioff held back on nearly 30 percent of the notes between what he published and what he played. Classic music publishers are extremely excited about finally getting the real deal to sell.

Zenph is creating methods to recreate a variety of instruments instead of just sticking to the piano. They’ve recreated a plucked double bass using a strange device from Germany that looks like a Tesla creation. We were treated to a virtual duet featuring Ray Brown on the techno double bass and Oscar Peterson on the robot piano. In the future, you can have all star bands with ghosts mingling with their breathing members. This isn’t merely the trick of playing along with an old tape of a dead artist. The missing musicians won’t be limited by their past. Soon there might be singing. Voice is the one thing they really want to crack. Imagine how it would be to finally liberate Enrico Caruso from his 10 inch cell? This is a few years down the road so don’t line up for Kate Smith sings Kiss yet.

Zenph is not merely working in the concept. They’ve already released several records under their “Re-performance” title that have been Grammy nominated. Violinist Joshua Bell has a duet with Rachmaninoff. For the Glenn Gould Re-performance of the 1955 version of Goldberg Variations, they placed stereo microphones where Gould’s head would have been. When you put on the headphones, you’re hearing what Gould heard behind the keyboard. They’ve also taken their show on the road to let audiences hear a glorious sound that goes beyond Memorex. Their Art Tatum: Piano show at the Apollo in 2008 had actor Paul Butler (Crime Story) as a club owner working with Tatum’s ghost at they keyboard. By the end of the run, the place was packed. How would the artist feel about such an event? Glenn Gould quit touring at the height of his fame in 1964. He hated the touring process. It’s pretty much certain he would have sent out the robot piano to collaborate with symphonies around the world. If you want to see the technology in a concert setting, Zenph is planning a show at New York’s Lincoln Center.

Zenph represents a strange new world of music where an artist is no longer limited by their recording technique. They’re no longer limited by death. They can continue to have an active career working with the top artists of the day. Sting has expressed interest in a duet with Louis Armstrong. I couldn’t help thinking the ultimate band to devise a complete album with this technology is Steely Dan. Walter Becker and Donald Fagen could allow themselves to be haunted with the ghosts of jazz and classical greats without being overwhelmed. Now there’s no reason they can’t play with their idols instead of merely paying tribute to them. Although eventually Walter and Donald would be the ghosts for the next pair of cynical kids eager for a collaboration.

This isn’t all about superstars being revived. The technology can become personal with the ability to upload tapes of a loved one to hear them play once more on your home piano. We always say art is immortal, but now people can truly become immortal thanks to their musical artistry thanks to Zenph. At the end of the presentation, I kept looking around to see Thomas Newton lurking behind curtains.

PAWNDERING

How can TruTV run a series called Hardcore Pawn that isn’t about Ron Jeremy selling off various parts of his collection? The new series that’s going after the Pawn Stars audience is about a Pawn store in Detroit. How depressing. Maybe we’ll get to see how much dreams and an Edsel hubcap fetch? Although this concept could have worked with Kid Rock unloading Pam Anderson’s used strap-on collection. Or Iggy Pop seeing how much he can get for his “first edition” groupies.

COMING SOON

When will we get to see Scott Pilgrim Versus Michael Cera’s Clone Army? Or maybe just Michael Cera Versus a Door Knob?

THAT DOESN’T RING

How come in Goodnight Moon, the bunny refuses to say goodnight to his telephone? Who leaves a telephone next to a little kid’s bed? This simple book has so many questions. How am I supposed to sleep without the answers?

FOOD OF THE GODS

The fine people of Food Lion have put Quisp back in the cereal aisle. The cereal is a spin-off of Cap’n Crunch. It’s just retro joy in my stomach. Run down and get a box so they’ll keep stocking the outer space morning surprise.

Now if only someone would revive Freakies.

Also be quick as Mountain Dew Throwback is delivering the sugar coated goodness. Expect to see blowback from the corn syrup lobby.

ALIEN AROUND THE CORNER

Can they hear you scream in 1080p?

BLU-RAY HEAVEN

Dexter: The Fourth Season was the reason to have cable last year. The Showtime series had its best season yet. Dexter has become sleep deprived with the arrival of his baby. He’s now a father and husband. It’s eating against his serial killer nature. He’s supposed to be a lone wolf. He attempts to get back in the killing game when he meets the Trinity Killer (John Lithgow). Instead of merely killing the killer, Dexter assumes an identity to learn how this guy manages being a husband, father and sociopath. Their friendship goes really wrong. Dexter is a show that just improves with each season. Lithgow makes you forget he was ever in Third Rock from the Sun. The 1080p imagine brings out the details when Lithgow and Michael C. Hall goes the distance. You might want to watch this on a weekend cause you aren’t going to want to go to bed early or wake up for work. You’ll also feel queasy when driving past a Habitat For Humanity site.

CORMAN-VISION

The latest batch of Roger Corman Cult Classics has arrived and it’s worthy of Drive-In glory. This series from Shout! Factory covers his output at New World that covered the 1970s and the early ’80s. He quickly created a studio that rivaled American International Pictures in the world of low budget cinema. They’ve created fresh transfers off the original film elements so these look so much better than the previous video releases.

Piranha: Special Edition is much better than this upcoming Piranha 3D. Joe Dante established himself as a director who knew how to mix dark humor and grotesque violence without diffusion. A military scientist has created intelligent piranha that can swim outside the Amazon river. A couple stupid people release them into a river. They head downstream to a kiddie summer camp and a brand new aquatic park. There’s more blood and guts in this film than Jaws. The great Richard Deacon even appears in the film. Paul Bartel was robbed of Oscar glory for his uptight camp counselor that wants all the kids in the water – no excuses. This Special Edition brings together all the bonus features of previous DVDs along with more extras to juice up the experience. The Making of documentary lets Joe talk about how his budget got slashed right before the shoot. Even under such tight restraints, he figured out how to shoot around water without turning into Waterworld.

Humanoids From the Deep is an eco-horror film. Turns out a local salmon fishery has been messing with hormones. Instead of bigger fish, the science creates mutant underwater men that are intent on two things: killing men and breeding with women. But the most horrifying thing on the screen is the perm on Vic Morrow (The Bad News Bears). He’s a redneck fisherman who doesn’t like the local Indians. He uses the aqua-attacks as a disguise to go after the friends of Doug McClure (The Land that Time Forgot). The action explodes during the Salmon festival on the docks. The monsters attack Miss Salmon and she fights back. Turns out the original director cut back on the monsters’ breeding moments so Corman sent a second crew to capture the unnatural bonding. This also explains why there’s no director’s commentary. But there are dozens of interviews including composer James Horner. Even though he’s made a fortune with the soundtracks of Titanic and Avatar, he remains proud of his Humanoid notes. If you only see one film about mutant salmon, let it be Humanoids From the Deep.

Deathsport/BattleTruck Double Feature is perfect for a post-apocalyptic night out. Deathsport brings back David Carradine for more futuristic wheeled mayhem after Death Sport 2000. He’s part of a modern primitive society that gets kidnapped by a technoid group. They force him and Claudia Jennings (Gator Bait) to enter the arena to be slaughtered by guards on supercycles. But the duo aren’t going down like that. Not only do they win, they escape with the bikes. This turns into a complicated pursuit that doesn’t quite make sense, but who cares. I recommend a few drinks before hitting play. The commentary track lets the director explain the behind the scenes issues with the shoot. BattleTruck was made in New Zealand at the same time The Road Warrior was being shot. This isn’t a rip-off although it involves a huge truck and a fight for gas. Michael Beck (The Warriors and Xanadu) is the loner who can help the downtrodden locals from a menacing gang that steals gas. One of the downtrodden is John Razenberger (Cliff from Cheers). The film looks great since the DP is two time Oscar winner Chris Menges (The Killing Fields and The Mission).

DVD SHELF

Max Headroom: The Complete Series finally lets me see the show without it being on a decade old crummy dupe tape from Bravo. What a great series. Edison Carter (Matt Frewer) zips around a decaying society that has been zombie-ized by cable news networks. Sounds pretty much like today. He gets his memory scanned into a computer which evolves into the computer generated Max Headroom. They only made 14 episodes. They don’t have the British pilot movie: 20 Minutes Into the Future. This was remade as the “Blipverts” episode so you’re only missing out on the English cast that wasn’t brought to ABC. While Shout! Factory couldn’t license the numerous Max Headroom related video like his New Coke commercials, they interview so many folks to give a complete oral portrait of the faux-CGI talking head. The series really gets extremely scathing about what TV channels will do in the future although it didn’t predict flat screens.

Ugly Betty: The Complete Fourth and Final Season is a bit of a shock. How could a show that started out with such a head of steam completely collapse? It’s not like they cut Betty’s hair. Doesn’t help when the network decides to move the show to Friday nights (home of the corpses). They do give Betty a promotion to associate features editor at Mode magazine. The finale has more nervous news. In the end, this shouldn’t have been too much of surprise since the magazine market is suffering. Think of how many titles have vanished from the airport newstand. At least they didn’t cast Anthony Anderson as the new publisher (he’s the 21st Century Ted McGinley).

Cougar Town: The Complete First Season finally lets Courteney Cox unleash her inner vixen. She’s a new divorcee eager to make up for all the time she was stuck being the good wife and mother. She’s ready to work all the young men in her Florida town. She’s a desperate housewife without all the soap opera. The only thing that causes tension in her life is when a young guy says he loves her. She’s not eager to return to that life. Although she’s got no problem getting a little action from her ex-husband. The show was created by the guy behind Scrubs so it has that quirky factor going in the comedy. This is so much better than Dirt.

Numb3rs: The 6th Season is really the final season. This was the last go around for the math based FBI show starring Rob Morrow, David Krumholtz and Judd Hirsch. The producers bring the show to an end with major betrayals and bumps in the 16 episodes. Morrow ends up losing his gun. The people who find it go on a crime spree. Is this ugliness going to ruin his engagement? There’s lots of brutal crimes with brainy solutions. John Michael Higgins pops up on “Dreamland.” Lou Diamond Phillips (La Bamba) takes one of Morrow’s men hostage to prove he’s innocent in “Ultimatum.” Henry Winkler (The Fonz) gets brought back to help on the DB Cooper case. Believe it or no, William Katt (Greatest American Hero) appears in “And the Winner Is….” A good run for a show that made geeks capture goons.

90210: The Second Season brings us back for more high school dramatics at West Beverly. The CW series does a good job at updating the ’90s late night soap by letting the kids text message and talk about youtube. Naomi Clark (AnnaLynne McCord) rebounds from her break up by hooking up with a married guy. That’s got to be nasty when you have to tell your wife that you need to attend your mistress’s JV Prom. Even in this free living part of America, the kids still get upset when their steadies kiss the wrong person. There’s pregnancy and cancer scares hitting them. The final episode has Mr. Cannon sexually assaults Naomi. Who will believe her side of the story? There’s 22 episodes spread over 6 DVDs.

NCIS: The Complete 7th Season once more makes me feel happy that David McCallum is on a hit series. His role as Medical Examiner Ducky Mallard has lasted longer than his iconic tenure on The Man From U.N.C.L.E. The unit is run by Mark Harmon so David’s not carrying the show. The season starts off with Ziva being released after her capture where terrorists wanted to know about NCIS. “Reunion” murders three guests at a bachelor party including a hanging, alcohol poisoning and a toilet drowning. This can’t be a coincidence. “Child’s Play” has a military intelligence officer using baby geniuses to crack codes. The end of the season has Mexican druglord action. Everybody wants a piece of NCIS. The bonus features include Cast Roundtable, 150th Episode, and a commentary track with Mark Harmon, Arvin Brown & Gary Glasberg. The 24 episodes are spread over 6 DVDs.

The Good Heart brings together Paul Dano (There Will Be Blood) and Brian Cox (Zodiac) as two unlikely friends. They meet up in the intensive care unit of a hospital when the homeless Paul hangs himself and the cranky tavern owner Brian has his fifth heart attack. While mending the two bond. Brian decides this wayward youth might be the perfect person to mold into the future tavern owner. There’s a lot of learning moments for Paul since Brian has major rules when it comes to the business. The place is a complete dive with nothing to fancy for his regulars. Paul breaks the number one rule of what makes a success when he gets involved with Isild Le Besco. She’s a French stewardess who has been overcome by a fear of flying. It’s three damaged people inside a decaying bar. Cox and Dano need to work again in a cleaner space.

George A. Romero’s Survival of the Dead: 2- Disc Ultimate Undead Edition brings more zombie nation action to the screen. Over 40 years after his Night of the Living Dead, Romero keeps up the creep action. This time we’re taken to Plum Island where two families feud over what to do with the walking dead. One side wants to kill them while the other holds out hope for “curing” them. How can you cure a zombie other than leaving them in a smoke house with a salt coating? The families are like the Hatfields and the McCoys in the time of zombies. Can there be peace on this island between the living people? What really matters is the numerous cool ways the Romero has the zombies and a few of the living snuffed. The bonus action on this set includes the documentary “Walking After Midnight,” lots of footage of Romero at work, the HDNet special and a guide to creating your own zombie bite. Who wouldn’t want to wear a zombie bite for Halloween?