Author: UncaScroogeMcD

  • Scrubs Blog: Picture Holiday

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    Things are still awfully busy now that production has resumed, with everyone running around a bit right now – so this week we’ve got a blast-from-the-past quartet of behind-the-scenes pics from the Zach Braff directed Episode #408: “My Last Chance” (all photos by Robert Cheung, Best Boy Electric).  

    Let me remind you, though, that in support of the National Multiple Sclerosis Society, a Scrubs Scooter is being raffled off on October 7th. Tickets for the auction can be purchased online right now for $5.00, with all the money going to the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. You can head over to the MS site and enter by CLICKING HERE And now, the pics… First off, Scene 30...

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    EXT. FIELD – NIGHT  

    J.D.
    What are you doing?

    JANITOR
    It’s been four years. How do you
    not get how this works?

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    Balloon Light by Lights Up…

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     Rich Davis (Camera Operator), Zach Braff, John Inwood (Director of Photography), and Andy Rawson (Gaffer) entranced at Video Village

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    Night Lights by Bebee…

  • Party Favors: Motherf’n Snakes

     

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    DURHAM — My summer is complete now that I saw those Motherf’n Snakes on a Motherf’n Plane at the Motherluvin’ Starlite Drive-in. It was a beauty to behold above my hood ornament. The film started out rather slow which is good cause at the Drive-in, you want to get some make out time in the microbus. But when the plane took off and the snakes went after the passengers, it was pure bliss. The theater is beneath a flight path so periodically the lights of a plane would appear in the night sky. I wonder if those people knew that there could be snakes on their plane!

    It’s a damn shame the film didn’t smash box office records. But maybe this is a film that is too scary for our times. People don’t want to imagine how they’d fight back against the snakes on a plane that has nothing more dangerous than a spork.

    Maybe the weak box office is from putting together two things folks fear the most – poisonous reptiles and airplanes. In the future, studios will restrict their horror flicks to only one scary element. This dooms my new project about a Great White Shark eating people at the DMV.

    Kevin Smith is supposedly wanting to get in on the horror action. I’ve got this new idea The Headhunter. It’s about a corporate headhunter who finds clients their dream jobs by locating the positions and killing the person that’s already in that job. Pinstripes and blood! Maybe a massacre at a corporate retreat. I got some twists for the script, but you have to pay to experience them. Unlike Paris Hilton, I don’t give away the money shots on the internet.

    UNDERGROUND DELIGHTS

    The Underground in Raleigh, North Carolina is now my favorite restaurant. It’s a small bistro tucked in the basement of Charlie Goodnight’s Comedy Club. And while that’s probably the set up to a joke about serving old watermelons smashed by Gallagher, I can assure you that it’s a land of serious dining.

    It’s a small plate joint so there’s no doggy bags. Which normally causes me great pain when I leave a table without tomorrow’s lunch all wrapped up and ready to reheat. But the dishes are amazing. Chef Dan Taylor shops at the local farmers’ market so the menu changes with what’s really in season around here. There’s no usual favorites. And he’s very creative with his combinations. We had this crab cake that used potatoes so they puffed up. This is the type of food play I’d expect served up on Iron Chef episodes that aren’t about shark’s tale and otter claws. If you ever find yourself in Raleigh; don’t drop by my house. Instead, call up Dawn at  (919) 664-8704 and make a reservation at the Underground for dinner. Odds are you’ll find me savoring a tasty duck entree or the lobster ravioli.

    It hurt me to watch Flavor Flav destroy the huge lobster on the new season of Flavor of Love. I could handle seeing the one girl take a dump in his living room. A mega-lobster is a dream dinner of mine (something I’ll eat after winning the Megabucks). Flav busting its claw like he was trying to remove a cellphone from the blister packaging is sacrilege.  I’m not sure how many pounds that lobster weighed, but I cried that much in tears. That lobster gave his life for fine eating and not to be turned into a Three Stooges prop.

    Why does Spike have to butcher up the Stooges on the weekend? Sunday morning, I’d like to see a like Moe in motion, but everytime I turn t the channel, it’s a stinkin’ commercial. Would it kill Spike to treat its viewers with respect? I need to Netflix the Sony collections cause I’m not paying so much for so few episodes. I must see “Uncivil Warbirds.” That’s comedy. How come instead of that Ultimate Fighting show, they don’t have The Stooge Challenger where idiots attempt to recreate a Stooges episode without using stuntmen or fake props? I’d watch it. Of course if they make the show and don’t pay me, I’ll sue Spike TV and be able to afford a ten pound lobster. Wonder if they can cook that up for me at the Underground?

    WHITE WASH TRASH

    Is it only in Raleigh that people in trendy neighborhoods are covering their expensive brick homes with white paint? Is this a national trend or merely local idiots upholding a dork tradition?

    LUX LIVE

    Luxuriamusic.com now has live DJs playing those swank sounds. After five years, the dream is back. This is the internet radio station that was marked for death by Clear Channel and was stolen back by the fans. I’m so proud that for once, a small band of diehards were able to stick it to the man. And they did it with a funky beat.

    THE EMAILS WERE LIES

    I’m at a sorority house at 2:30 in the morning. Under normal circumstances, the story would involve the phrase: “and then after posting bail….” But not this time. I was helping with a live satellite feed to morning shows across America about campus fire safety. Did you know that there are plenty of stupid kids going to major colleges? My favorite was a guy who decided to defrost his mini-fridge in the dorm by using a candle. Did I mention he didn’t turn off the fridge? And get this, he left the room for a couple hours with the candle still going. And the funny part is that it burned down half the dorm. Damn shame that this wasn’t a question on the SAT so that dorks don’t get into schools.

    While we were working at the sorority house until the sun came up, none of the girls asked me any questions about how they can improve the internet cameras in their shower room. How come I get email every day from sorority girls wanting me to see them showering at the house when these girls don’t have one? Is this just another internet lie on the scale of my wikipedia entry? The sad part is that I showed up for the shoot with a Bill O’Reilly approved falafel. He likes seeing women use them in the shower.

    SAYING NO

    Dr. Phil’s people have called me three times now begging for me to appear on his show. He really wants to explore my “Slacker WIth No Shame” lifestyle. But he can’t handle the truth. And I don’t think my life can fully be explored at 9 a.m. on broadcast TV. I’m late night HBO. I don’t want to scare sick children. Hopefully Dr. Phil’s weasel won’t try to suck up to me with a fruitbasket. I can resist a fresh pineapple. I will however accept a free trip to Cathouse. I can work out some issues with an intense therapy session with Bridget the Midget.

    Can the IRS tax me for comp sex at a brothel? They’re going after the Oscar gift baskets. I’m delighted that the comp circus is getting screwed up. Too many E! specials about the freebies is pretty pathetic.

    PARIS VS KFED

    The loser of this battle of the golden throats: People with ears.

    TRIPLE DIP DELIGHTS

    Remember the first time your favorite movie came out on DVD? Think back all those five or six years. Weren’t you excited? And try to capture the feeling you had when they announced a few years later when they’d have a special edition hitting the shelves with tons of bonus features and the promise of a remastered video transfer? And you bought it because damn it, you wanted those kick ass bonus features. You tolerated the double dip into your wallet because they got it right this time.

    Well this year the studios have gone for the triple dip! Scarface,, James Bond, and Frankenstein are begging to become triplets on your video shelf. How many times does New Line expect folks to repurchase the various Lord of the Rings titles? And George Lucas is about to pull an amazing fast one on Star Wars fans. This month he releases the first three films (Phantom Menace and its poor cousins get to the back of the line) with a bonus DVD containing the original theatrical cuts. It was all the buzz when it was announced. Of course Lucas immediately deflated the joy of those who wanted to see Han shoot Greedo first. He announced that he’ll be just yanking this transfer off the laserdisc master. It’d be non-anamorphic with no real retouching.

    But this isn’t Lucas’ greatest sin against fans. What’s leaked out is that next year for the 30h anniversary, he’s going to once more buff up the films and put them out in a mega-boxset. The original cuts will be included. So those of you who run down to Best Buy this month for the limited edition DVDs, will be contemplating buying another DVD of Empire Strikes Back in less than a year. And they aren’t even talking about the upcoming boxset being in an HD format. What’s the point?

    Right now I’m staring at the Frankenstein and Dracula DVDs that Universal is shipping out at the end of September. I bought the first versions that came out in 1999. And I was pretty happy with them. When they re-issued them in 2004, I didn’t mind because they also threw in all the follow-up movies in the collection at a low price. I want my House of Dracula in the collection. Plus they threw in mini-busts of Bela, Boris and Lon as their classic monsters. Hugh Hefner has them above his bed in the The Playboy Mansion. But now the monsters are back and I’m going to fight them off. The only real bonus on each seems to be documentaries on Boris and Bela. I can’t pull the trigger on this purchase. Mostly because I know Mrs. Corey is holding a gun if they show up in the mail. I’m not a wuss. Women have that “you already own two copies, what do you need a third one for?” look in their facial vocabulary. It’s followed by the “does your mom still have space for you in the basement” lip rise.

    In a few years, I’ll be wanting to upgrade to HD on a lot of titles. What’s the point in rebuying outmoded technology? Do you see me waiting for Best Buy to stock The Best of Loverboy on 8-track? MGM will be releasing new versions of the James Bond DVDs in a few months. I’m still happy with my complete collection that bought four years ago. Do I really need to upgrade Octopussy? I’m holding out till it’s HD upgrade time for 007. And even then, it’s only going to be the Connery collection that needs the 1080i action along with On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. Are you laughing? It’s the most emotionally complicated Bond film. I don’t think we could have accepted Connery in the role. We’ll argue this out later. But for now let it be known that I won’t be getting any HD versions of The World Is Not Enough or Tomorrow Never Dies.

    The funny thing is reading about a slowdown in DVD sales. Maybe studios could make a little more money if they wouldn’t keep recycling titles?  I shouldn’t be too harsh on Universal since they do have dipped into their vaults for a few more afternoon creeps that haven’t been warhorsed on DVD. 

    The Boris Karloff Collection contains The Tower of London, The Black Castle, The Climax, The Strange Door and Night Key on three dvds.  It’s nice that Boris is getting the same treatment as Bela Lugois received last Halloween season. Although those five titles were crammed on one flipper DVD.  Inner Sanctum Mysteries: The Complete Movie Collection packs Calling Dr. Death, Weird Woman, Dead Man’s Eyes, The Frozen Ghost, Strange Confession and Pillow of Death onto 2 DVDs. These hour long chillers starred Lon Chaney Jr so it’s kinda his boxset. The folks at Universal have decided to be extra busy by putting out The Classic Sci-Fi Ultimate Collection with the science scary Tarantula, The Mole People, The Incredible Shrinking Man, The Monolith Monsters and Monster on Campus. All of these sets come out on Sept 19. How does Universal expect someone to still have money for the Dracula and Frankenstein DVDs that come out the next week? It must be noted that the Sci-Fi boxset is a Best Buy exclusive deal. But I’ll deal with the devil to see the Jack Arnold classics.

    WES VS. THE DAN

    Steely Dan’s intervention letter to Wes Anderson is posted in my discussion section. Why are the Dan more creative with their letters than their last two albums? I even grew to love Gaucho, especially after my girlfriend ran off with a latin american slimeball. My heart knew what those Babylon Sisters were shaking. But their comeback records just didn’t make me want to come forward in my passion for Donald and Walter. I blame the road for the quality of the music. They had to write music that they could play live. There could be no delicate moments that were found on Aja.

    As far as their advice to Wes Anderson goes, someone needs to tell the guy that he’s working himself into that “only for the devoted” attitude. Wes has been on a creative decline since the second half of Rushmore. What was the point of the third act? Wes has mistaken artifice for entertainment. I’m still bitter at buying Life Aquatic instead of renting it. That film ruined my spoof of Blue Water, White Death that were had a production company nibbling to create.

    There needs to be a reality show where Steely Dan shows up and saves artists who are in the process of screwing over their career with their genius. Of course the first episode would feature Walter and Donald shoving Kevin Federline into a wood chipper. Not that KFed is a rapping genius. We just need a ratings grabber.

    WHY?

    How could Fox dump Jillian Barberie as the NFL Weather gal? I’m blaming Joe Buck’s wife. I haven’t heard anything on the record, but I sense that Mrs. Buck knows that she can’t compete with Jillian’s heels. Damn all those at Fox that brought an end to an era. It’s a good thing my team is in the AFC so I won’t have to watch Fox’s pregame shows.

  • Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review, Seven Samurai

     

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    As I’ve noted elsewhere, we seem to be experiencing a rush of great DVD releases. This flowering, this elevation, of DVD content may be a coincidence, or it may be the last gasp of DVD before Blu-Ray or HD-DVD take over. Or it may just be “fall,” when, traditionally, the movie industry “gets serious.” But whatever the reason, DVD collectors are grateful for such recent notable titles as the box sets of Rohmer and Malle, Powell’s  A Canterbury Tale, the  Mr. Moto set, and the box of Jayne Mansfield movies. Also among them was  Apocalypse Now: The Complete Dossier, the latest version of a film that continues to reveal new facets and spark interesting commentary. It can be endlessly watched and endlessly debated.

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    Another similarly rich movie is  Seven Samurai, coming out from Criterion in a new three disc set Tuesday, September 5 (and retailing for $49.95). Thanks to the new commentary track and the two big supplements, I learned this time around that the movie  should be called  Seven Ronin. It seems, if I understand the chat correctly, that the seven warriors coming to the aid of a small village annually raided by brigands, are masterless samurai, i.e., ronin. In fact, according to one of the experts on the disc, the real samurai, which made up five per cent of the population in the 16th century when  Seven Samurai is set, were often merely bureaucrats filing paperwork for their bosses.

     

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    But that is just one nugget amongst many. And the film is well worth seeing again anyway because  Seven Samurai is one of the great works of cinematic “existential humanism,” perhaps the best “philosophy” for making great, high art films, and most post war European films fall broadly into this category (you might also call it the Janus Films philosophy). Kurosawa’s innovation is to marry it to an action film, and his ability to elicit beautiful movement from his camera, from his cast, and, more theoretically, from his narrative, serve to, so to speak, embed his views, rather than make them the point of a given scene.

     

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    I’ve just re-listened to the Michael Jeck audio commentary track, often heralded as the gold standard of audio commentary tracks, and which also appears on the original DVD, which bore spine number 2, and which also shares with the new set the movie’s theatrical trailer. Also included then but now missing were an essay by David Ehrenstein and, for those lucky enough to get the earliest pressings of the disc, a restoration demonstration that was later removed.

    I’ve also listened to the new commentary track recorded for the new release, still labeled CC No. 2 so it supersedes the old disc. The new commentary is an edited group effort that begins with Stephen Prince, and proceeds through David Desser, Tony Rayns, Donald Richie (who emphasizes the influence of Soviet cinema on AK), and Joan Mellen. The set also comes with a 60-page booklet that includes essays by Kenneth Turan, Peter Cowie, Philip Kemp, Peggy Chiao, Alain Silver, Stuart Galbraith IV, Toshiro Mifune, Sidney Lumet, and Arthur Penn.

     

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    This is a three disc set and the first disc, which has the first half of the movie, also features a suite of trailers and teasers, and a production stills and poster gallery, combining to present about 40 images. The second disc, besides offering the second half of the film, features the 55-minute episode on  Seven Samurai from the Japanese television series  It’s Wonderful to Create (segments of this series also appear on other Criterions). From it, we learn that there was a first scene that was stuck from the film in which the brigands attack an earlier, different village, and then the doc runs through the script writing process, the film’s music, problems in shooting the “burning water mill” sequence, and other cruxes. It’s highly entertaining and informative, with many alum of the production telling funny anecdotes. It’s also filled with shots of the much-worked over script and costume test footage.

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    Finally, disc three has two big supplements.  My Life in Cinema is a two-hour TV interview with Kurosawa from 1993, probably arranged to help promote his then recent and it turns out last film  Madadayo. It’s conducted by fellow helmer Nagisa Oshima, a wholly different kind of director, but who acts with deference towards his elder. It’s a good nuts and bolts interview, talking about AK’s background and how he does what he does. Oshima begins by asking about Kurosawa’s ethnic background (the director was unusually tall), and Kurosawa avers that there may have been some Russian interbreeding way back in his family’s past (which makes an interesting connection with Richie’s points).

    The second is  Seven Samurai: Origins and Influences. This is an original documentary, made by Criterion. It’s divided into three parts. The first covers the history of the samurai in Japanese culture. The second part covers earlier samurai films, with clips from early silent films featuring rather stagy, balletic sword fights. The final part covers the innovations to the genre that Kurosawa wrought. This effort provides a good grounding in all that goes into the samurai legend, thanks to the various commentaries, who make up the same scholars doing the commentary, with one exception, and should inspire newer fans to get caught up via such books as Alain Silver’s  The Samurai Film, along with books by the scholars summoned to commentate.

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    Criterion has a new, softer look and a new logo, introduced a few movies back, but this is the release that is probably going to introduce it to the consumer. This set will be a bestseller.

     

     

  • Take Me Home Blog #8 – LET THERE BE SITE

     

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    I’M NOT GOING TO LIE TO YOU (because you aren’t family)
    I’ve had a Take Me Home website done for about four months now. I was going to revamp it; make it a little more “user-friendly” for the whole lot of you. But then I realized that what was more important was that you guys and gals get to see how we’re trying to appeal to THE MAN. No, I don’t mean Randy “Macho-Man” Savage, I mean the people in power, our prospective investors. The site was designed to be professional, even (dare I say) tasteful. Regardless, I’m pretty excited about it; I think it’s a good site. If anything, it’ll give you all a little more perspective on exactly the type of film we’re making.

    THE BIG TEASE
    Not to mention, there’s actually a decent teaser trailer we made specifically for the site. We shot it in three days, edited it in two. It cost us under a grand, but I think you folks will agree it’s looks a heckuva’ lot pricier. Most importantly, it gives our investors something concrete; they can see this movie’s potential.

    AND, FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY
    To give you a little more perspective on exactly how desperate we’d become with our ex-potential investors, take a look at the “FOR OUR INVESTORS” link on the main page. It’s basically a last-ditch effort to get these guys to put their money where their mouth is (or was”¦and then wasn’t).

    Anyway,

    TAKE A LOOK-SEE:

    http://www.takemehomemovie.com

    COMING NEXT WEEK:
    “Well, the Hail Mary failed”¦ how “˜bout a first down?”

    -Sam Jaeger

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  • Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Reviews – Fox Film Noirs and Double Indemnity

     

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    I’m growing rather weary of being quoted on noir DVD audio commentary tracks. I don’t mean to be blasé about it, but it happens ever so often. 

    The first time was on James Foley’s track for Confidence, where he made reference to my earlier review of his film After Dark, My Sweet, which I dubbed a film soleil. Now, a commentator on one of the four noirs here under review (I think it is Eddie Muller on Double Indemnity) says something like “Someone once said that there are no bad noirs” “¦ and that was me again (in my book Film Soleil, from Pocket Essentials). Now, it is true that none of these people remember my name, and in fact the idea that there are no bad noirs is probably a pretty common one and someone else may have said it well before me. But still, all this attention is making my head hurt and I have to lie down.

    But it is true. There are no bad noirs. Even the “bad” ones, such as a couple in the latest batch of Fox noirs, are still interesting, evocative, and can inspire comment.

    Fox releases a trio of films in its series Fox Film Noir every three months or so, and the latest set brings the count up to 21. Universal has done a batch or two, but has slowed down considerably, and its new double disc set of Double Indemnity, published as part of its Legacy Series, seems more like a Billy Wilder production than an iteration of its noir catalog.

     

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    Shock, from 1946, is No. 20 in the set and is a GaslightSnake Pit sort of deal in which Anabel Shaw, in San Francisco to meet her husband after a long separation due to the war, witnesses a murder and falls into a state of catatonia. She is rushed to an asylum by, of all people, the very murderer she observed, played by Price, who happens to be a psychiatrist having an affair with Lynn Bari, the film’s femme fatale.

     

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    Like many a noir, especially the noirs influenced by Hitchcock, this one, directed by Alfred L. Werker from a script credited to Martin Berkeley, Albert DeMond, and Eugene Ling, shows a surprising amount of sympathy for its “villain.” Price’s Dr. Richard Cross is a man who momentarily loses control, and then tries to mop up after himself, harried by his Lady Macbeth, Bari. He is divided, doesn’t want to do many of the things he ends up doing, and Price, in one of his first villainous roles, manages to evoke great sympathy for Cross, despite a tendency to haminess, which afflicted Price throughout his career. Meanwhile, the heroine is asleep or unconscious most of the time, to be carted around from one venue to another (like Jodi Foster in most of the dreadful Five Corners), and her husband, when he arrives, spends most of his time trying to catch up with what the audience knows.

    The Fox noirs have settled into a routine in which basically for supplements you get a yak track and the trailer. On Shock the track is by John Stanley, the Creature Features movie guide author, summoned because he is something of an authority on Price. Stanley is one of those unvarnished (he says “Eye-Talian”), somewhat mush-mouthed (he says “landschape” instead of “landscape”), and jokey film geeks who read too much of Famous Monsters of Filmland when he was a kid: his commentary is filled with excruciatingly bad puns (“What food these morsels be”) no doubt in mimicry of that magazine’s editor Forrest J Ackerman. The commentary is mostly about Price, whom Stanley had the advantage of meeting twice, but he is also good on almost all the actors on the screen, even those whose names don’t appear in the credits.

     

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    As others have noted, Fox seems to be stretching the definition of noir with its inclusion of Fourteen Hours (No. 21), the 1951 drama about a potential suicide that Howard Hawks famously hated. Directed by Henry Hathaway, it’s more like a social problem film, like No Way Out, the Sidney Poitier – Richard Widmark race-themed drama which was in an earlier batch of Fox noirs.

     

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    It comes across as a well meaning TV drama of the time, and could have been penned by Rod Serling. But it is also afraid to come out, so to speak, and say what it is really about. Richard Basehart’s potential suicide never says why he is depressed, but it is clear from the subtext, as Foster Hirsch points out in his detailed and interpretive commentary, that Basehart’s character is probably gay and wrestling with his identity. Besides the trailer, the disc also features the film’s press book.

     

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    Vickie is No. 19, came out in 1953, and is a remake of I Wake Up Screaming, which came out 10 years earlier and is considered to be the first Fox noir, if not one of the first films in the genre itself. Both films are based on Steve Fisher’s novel about a publicist accused of killing the client who was getting too big for her britches. Neither film captures the flavor of the novel, which has wonderfully cynical things to say about show business, but the earlier film (which is Fox Film Noir No. 18) is better cast. There it is Victor Mature as the publicist versus Laird Cregar as the cop who, Laura-like, secretly loved the victim (Carole Landis). Betty Grable, trying to escape musicals, plays the victim’s sister, who ends up aiding the publicist.

     

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    H. Bruce Humberstone directed Screaming, and imported noirish tones from his B movie work. Vicki is helmed by Harry Horner who had, if it is possible, an even less distinguished directorial career than Humberstone ( Red Planet Mars). After some 15 films, he gave it up to become a production designer, working on such films as The Hustler and The Driver.

     

    Jean Peters

     

    Vicki is also weakly cast. Elliott Reid is awfully light as the publicist, and Richard Boone is game but sluggish and miscast as the cop. Foster Hirsch in his commentary, favors Jeanne Crain as sister Jill over Jean Peters as victim Vicki (they look remarkably alike), but I had the opposite impression. Jean Peter struck me as a real find, an actress whose career might bear reconsideration. Hirsch’s commentary is efficient and informative, and the disc also comes with the trailer and three galleries of art and advertising.

     

    Double Indemnity box

     

    Double Indemnity is a long awaited DVD but it has in fact been on disc twice already, first by Universal in a bare bones release, then by Image in a transfer from a scratchy print. Still, that Image disc was hard to find when it went out of print, and in the video store down the street from me you had to put down a $200 dollar deposit in order to rent it, as if it were Salo. Curiously, though, I found a pristine used copy of the Image disc just a couple of weeks ago for seven dollars.

    And what a pleasure it is to re-submerge oneself into this great film, with its crisp dialogue, brilliant acting from unlikely cast members, now in a nice package with an excellent (if soft) transfer and good supplements that honor the film.

     

    Fred MacMurray

     

    This two-disc set has an excellent full-frame transfer (1.33:1) transfer from a new source-print with an adequate DD 2.0 audio, plus English, French, and Spanish subtitles. The supplements on Disc One include an introduction by Robert Osborne of Turner Classic Movies, and two commentary tracks. The first is an enthusiastic, informative track by Richard Schickel, who wrote a BFI Classic monograph on the film, and here goes over the basics. The second has Nick Redman interviewing screenwriter Lem Dobbs on the film.

     

    Barbara Stanwyck

     

    Dobbs is the son of American born but British educated painter R. B. Kitaj, who in the late 1960s and early 1970s spent a lot of time in Los Angeles socializing with and painting famous directors, such as John Ford. Kitaj also happened to know Wilder who was a great art collector. Dobbs has several anecdotes to tell about meeting Wilder (once with Hockney and his dad), and nervously giving Wilder scripts to read that were later critiqued at Wilder’s independent office at the Writers and Artists building. Dobbs notes the sense of place given to Los Angeles, specific streets named and places shot, that he speculates would not fly with contemporary executives because they wouldn’t see the point of being so specific about a place that most viewers wouldn’t have been to. The most interesting thing that Dobbs says is to go against conventional thinking and charge I.A.L. Diamond with a degradation in Wilder’s output in the 1960s; he maintains that after his collaboration with Diamond began Wilder’s films more theatrical and more like sit coms.

     

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    The retrospective documentary, Shadows of Suspense (37 minutes) also on the first disc is a very good celebration of the film and it is also interesting to see the faces that go with a lot of the noir yak tracks one hears: the ubiquitous and bickersome Silver and Ursini look like twins. Finally there is the theatrical trailer.

    Disc Two consists solely of the 1973 made-for-TV remake starring Richard Crenna in the MacMurray role, Lee J. Cobb as his boss, and Samantha Eggar as the femme fatale. It is exactly as good as it sounds.

    As others have pointed out, not included on the set is the famous real ending, the gas-chamber sequence, which apparently did not test well at the time and may be lost, though stills exist. Paramount’s version of Sunset Boulevard had a version of the famous dropped opening, but there is not even an attempt to recreate it via stills and script here. But perhaps that is for the super deluxe HD-DVD 70th anniversary edition in 2014.

     

  • Weekend Shopping Guide 9/1/06: Areas Of My Expertise

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    The weekend’s here. You’ve just been paid, and it’s burning a hole in your pocket. What’s a pop culture geek to do? In hopes of steering you in the right direction to blow some of that hard-earned cash, it’s time for the Quick Stop Weekend Shopping Guide – your spotlight on the things you didn’t even know you wanted…

    It takes a lot for a book to make it onto my “By crikey, this is brilliant!!!” list. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy… Terry Jones’s Chaucer’s KnightHuckleberry FinnGreen Eggs and Ham… and The Prydain Chronicles are just a few past honorees. Anyhoo, I come to celebrate (again) just such a work of literary brilliance – its name is The Areas of My Expertise (Riverhead Trade, $14.00 SRP), and its author is John Hodgman, a man of letters (26, to be exact – and he used every last one of them to write this book). Presented in the form of an ersatz almanac, it’s a hilarious journey into the secret Hobo culture (and the list of 700 Hobo names), the American presidents who had hooks for hands, little known facts about the 51 U.S. States, Lycanthropic Transformation Timetables (very important), and much, much more. Hodgman writes in an easily accessible, quite matter-of-fact style about matters most surreal – yet disturbingly plausible. I love this book, and I think you will, too… And now that it’s available in a newly expanded paperback edition and audiobook form ($29.95 SRP), you have absolutely no excuse not to pick it up.

    A part of me is still pissed that Arrested Development – one of the most brilliant shows to ever grace the tube – was cancelled. There’s another part of me, though, that acknowledges that Fox did allow it to eke out three low-rated seasons, and that so finely-tuned a sitcom forever risks slipping off the knife-edge and falling into the abyss of mediocrity or – worst of all – self-parody. So let’s celebrate its all-too-brief life with the release of that third and final season (Fox, Not Rated, DVD-$29.98 SRP), featuring all 13 episodes, plus audio commentaries, deleted/extended scenes, a blooper reel, and a featurette on the last day on location.

    While some shows start out brilliant than fade over the years, South Park has had the opposite trajectory, honing its satire and enriching the characters who inhabit the quirky mountain town, including our four leads – Kyle, Stan, Kenny, and Cartman. By the eighth season (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$49.99 SRP), the gloves were off and the targets were bigger, from Michael Jackson and illegal immigration to Wal-Mart and Mel Gibson (in a still relevant look at the sentiments of The Passion of the Christ). This was also the season of the anime role-playing that resulted in an ocularly injured Butters (and some memorable fantasy sequences). The 3-disc set has the usual run of mini-commentaries from Matt & Trey.

    Growing up with the likes of Gummi Bears and DuckTales, the announcement that there would soon be an entire afterschool block full of these Disney cartoons – plus some new series – was met with an excitement that carried me right through to the premiere of “The Disney Afternoon” and its first original show, TaleSpin (Walt Disney, Not Rated, DVD-$34.99 SRP), starring Jungle Book veteran Baloo s a 1930’s era cargo pilot in a world full of air pirates (led by the delightfully deranged Don Karnage. The following year, we got another great addition with the superhero pastiche Darkwing Duck (Walt Disney, Not Rated, DVD-$34.99 SRP) – in fact, I still have an action figure of the villain Megavolt on my desk. While it’s great that the complete first seasons of both shows are now in DVD (with their pilot episodes – at least Disney occasionally listens to fans), they lack even a single special feature. Pathetic treatment for such great shows.

    Speaking of memorable Saturday morning cartoons, the first season (sans one rights-issue episode) of Ben Edlund’s lovable superheroic oaf The Tick (Buena Vista, Not Rated, DVD-$34.99 SRP) has also hit DVD, but like the two Disney animated sets is completely featureless. Why is Disney so incredibly pathetic about this? No Edlund commentaries, no featurettes… no nothing. For criminy’s sake, come on!

    Far more politically strident than the much-beloved (and missed) TV Nation, The Awful Truth found Michael Moore pulling no punches, from conducting a mock-funeral at the offices of an HMO to getting Crackers the Crime-Fighting Chicken locked in the Disneyland jail, including running a ficus plant for Congress. If the complete season sets frighten you, you can get 6 episodes selected from seasons 1 & 2 on The Best of The Awful Truth (Docurama, Not Rated, DVD-$19.95 SRP), featuring a pair of commentaries from Moore.

    Released independently but now contained in one handy-dandy set, The Personal Best of Monty Python’s Flying Circus (A&E, Not Rated, DVD-$44.95 SRP) features 6 discs – one for each member of the troupe, who fills it with their personal selection of favorite sketches, plus some new material (making it a must-have for Python fans). Of the new material, my favorite is probably John Cleese’s crass look behind-the-scenes of his selections, filmed at his palatial California estate.

    Finally remastered and presented with a decent, if slight, complement of bonus materials, Miyazaki fans will feel the irresistible compulsion to add the classic Lupin adventure The Castle of Cagliostro (Anchor Bay, Not Rated, DVD-$24.98 SRP) to their collections – probably after re-watching it a half dozen times. Those bonus materials include an interview with animation director Yasuo Ohtsuka, a photo gallery, and the complete animatic with the film’s soundtrack.

    Looking to find common ground in a post-9/11 word, the USA secretly sends Albert Brooks to India and Pakistan to see if that common ground could be comedy in the aptly titled Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World (Warner Bros., Rated PG-13, DVD-$27.98 SRP), which mixes just enough reality into the absurdity to be believable, much like Brooks’ brilliant (and so ahead of its time) Real Life. Unfortunately, Brooks doesn’t have quite the same precision he once did, which is shame, because the concept is a valid one, and a source rife with potential that goes largely untapped in the film. Bonus materials are limited to additional scenes and the theatrical trailer.

    The penultimate seventh season of The Andy Griffith Show (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$38.99 SRP) found the classic series mired in its color demise, with only occasional appearances by Don Knotts to relives the tedium of Andy’s courting phase. There’s still plenty of solid moments to make dismissing the show impossible, but it’s definitely not their high water period.

    By the time its 5th season rolled around, Will & Grace (Lionsgate, Not Rated DVD-$44.98 SRP) had settled comfortably into the stunt-casting, easy-joke ensemble piece it had been longing to express itself as – which isn’t strictly a bad thing, but I wish they had tried a little bit hard to keep some of the freshness of the show’s early seasons. The 4-disc set features an outtake reel and a collection of those always pointless themed clip featurettes.

    Though he’s looking like death warmed over and she was sadly believable playing Chandler Bing’s transgendered father, both Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner made a string of memorable flicks in the 80’s, which all began with a good ol’ fashioned popcorn adventure, Romancing The Stone (Fox, Rated PG, DVD-$19.98 SRP), directed by Robert Zemeckis and featuring a then-modern day Indiana Jones pulp spectacular (with more of a romance flair, and heavy sax work from Alan Silvestri’s score). It was followed up by the not-nearly as original but still somewhat fun Jewel of the Nile (Fox, Rated PG, DVD-$19.98 SRP), which re-teamed the pair and had the good sense to bring back Danny DeVito (before all 3 would go on to finish out the decade with the wonderfully caustic War of the Roses). Both Stone and Jewel have gotten remastered special edition treatment, with both releases containing retrospective featurettes (with new cast and crew interviews), deleted scenes, and a commentary on Jewell from director Lewis Teague.

    Not only does The Best of Mr. Bean (A&E, Not Rated, DVD-$14.95 SRP) feature over 2 hours of the best bits of Rowan Atkinson’s classic creation, but also the 40-minute documentary The Story of Bean. It’s a nice companion to that Mr. Bean box set that should already be sitting on your shelf.

    Unlike the pre-packaged, lip-synced pap often found over its mainstream sister show Top of the Pops, the BBC’s Old Grey Whistle Test (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$24.98 SRP) featured (from 1971-1987) artists that today would be considered indie (from Jackson Browne to Janis Ian) alongside more well-known artists and groups (including The Bangles and Roger Daltry). The key, though, was that the artists performed live – which is what makes the DVD releases, the latest being Volume 3, such a fun time warp. The new disc features over 2 dozen performances, plus audio commentary from the presenters and reminiscences about their appearances from the artists themselves.

    It’s a sad, but all-too-common, story wherein a popular TV series that can do no wrong in its blockbuster first season suddenly stumbles and plants their face in the mud come their sophomore outing, and there are few who will argue that Desperate Housewives (Buena Vista, Not Rated, DVD-$59.99 SRP) didn’t lose its soapy way during it’s second season. Remind yourself of the mis-steps and hope for a 3rd season recovery this fall with all 24 2nd season eps, plus interviews, deleted scenes, and more.

    It was only a matter of time before we got the first behind-the-scenes reality series about NASCAR, but thankfully we avoid Real World territory in the Biography Channel’s NASCAR: Driven to Win (A&E, Not Rated, DVD-$24.95 SRP), which focuses on the lives – both on and off the track – of a handful of up-and-coming drivers. All in all, it’s an interesting look at the determination needed to participate in a sport I care very little about. Bonus features include a behind-the-scenes featurette and a driver Q&A.

    If purple’s your aural paradise and paisley’s your passion, then be sure to snag a copy of Prince and the New Power Generation: Diamonds and Pearls Video Collection (Rhino, Not Rated, DVD-$14.98 SRP). I think the title is pretty self-explanatory. It also features some bonus live performances.

    Okay, the only thing – and I mean the ONLY thing – tolerable and even approaching enjoyable about the completely unwanted, unnecessary Brother Bear 2 (Walt Disney, Rated G, DVD-$29.99 SRP) is the presence – and enlarge roles – for the pair of Moose voiced by Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas. Everything else about this steaming waste is just a seemingly never-ending abyss of crap. The DVD features a behind-the-scenes look at the music, and the ever-useless games.

    While not directed by Hughes, Some Kind of Wonderful (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$14.99 SRP) is definitely a Hughes film, with a script provided by the 80’s auteur , who also produced. And now we’ve got a special edition of the rom-com, featuring an audio commentary with director Howard Deutch and Lea Thompson, a making-of doc, and behind-the-scenes featurettes.

    As the title implies, Washington The Warrior (History Channel, Not Rated, DVD-$24.95 SRP) is an examination of the young military officer from Virginia who fought in the French and Indian Wars and eventually rose to the rank of commander of the revolutionary army and our nation’s first president. Did you know that that path included a 17-year retirement? No? Then watch this doc.

    Just when you thought they couldn’t find a new, trashier way to disgust audiences, the 3rd season of Nip/Tuck (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$59.98 SRP) carts out the 600-lb. woman fused to her sofa. Seriously. But that’s par for the course, and all in the spirit of the show – where the season really stumbled is the sadly ho-hum quality of the mysterious Carver, the knife-wielding worst nightmare of plastic surgeons Sean and Christian, It’s what happens when guilty pleasures get too daytime soap-y. The 6-disc set features unaired scenes, a Carver featurette, and a spotlight on the set design.

    What could have been a great ensemble drama about a group of married women and their single friend instead plays like a half-hearted dramatic play on Desperate Housewives and Sex and the City. It’s unfortunate, because Friends With Money (Sony, Rated R, DVD-$28.95 SRP) has a fantastic cast (Jennifer Aniston, Catherine Keener, Joan Cusack, Frances McDormand) just itching to go, but they’re left with melodrama. Bonus features include an audio commentary, a premiere featurette, behind-the-scenes featurette, and a Sundance featurette.

    As a TV junkie since childhood, I can’t help but compare the horrors of war and skill and sacrifice of the military medical personnel and soldiers in the documentary Baghdad ER (HBO, Not Rated, DVD-$24.98 SRP) with years of watching episodes of M*A*S*H. The humanity and grace under pressure are the same, even if the modern facilities and procedures provide for a much higher survival rate than the Korean War crises fictionalized in Hollywood’s take. Still, Baghdad ER is a sobering look at the cost of the war, and worth experiencing no matter which side of the political fence you fall on.

    I can’t be the only one who, while finding his stunts mostly enjoyable, is still mildly disturbed by (magician? performer? devilspawn?) Criss Angel. Surely others must find him somewhat off-putting. Either way, he’s got a holiday DVD release with Criss Angel, Mindfreak: Halloween (A&E, Not Rated, DVD-$19.95 SRP), which contains not only the special, but also a pair of new-to-DVD episodes from the show’s first season (“Uncut” and “Up Close”).

    If a star-studded jaunt with the Bard fits your agenda for the weekend, you’ll want to give spin to the Thames Shakespeare Collection (A&E, Not Rated, DVD-$49.95 SRP), featuring a quartet of classic plays (MacBeth, King Lear, Romeo & Juliet, and Twelfth Night) performed by the likes of Kenneth Branagh, Ian McKellen, Judi Dench, Patrick Magee, and more. Bonus features include interviews and a featurette on Romeo & Juliet.

    So there you have it… my humble suggestions for what to watch, listen to, play with, or waste money on this coming weekend. See ya next week…

  • Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review, Just My Luck

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    Lindsay

    Lohan, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Lind-say-low-han: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of (three or) four steps (depending on how you pronounce her last name) down the palate to tap, at four, on the soft palate. Lin. Say. Lo. Han (or Loan). She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning, standing five foot five in one boot. She was Lindsay in slacks. She was Linds at school. She was Lindsay on the dotted line. But in my dreams she was always Lohan.

    If only she would stop making movies like  Just My Luck.

    Not that there is anything wrong with it. It is not funny, but is supposed to be a comedy. It evokes no sentiment or tears, and it supposed to be a romance. It is set in Manhattan but does not capture the spirit of the city (but then, few of the recent comedies set there have, perhaps because they are usually shot in Toronto).

    Lohan has herself been very lucky. She has had, in essence, nine lives. But is her luck running out?

    There is a marvelous moment, a typically Lohanian moment in the middle of what at this point remains Lindsay Lohan’s magnum opus,  Mean Girls. Her character, Cady Heron, is a newcomer to school serving as something of an undercover agent or sleeper cell on behalf of her newfound nerd friends and against the school’s elite “Heathers” who have oppressed them.

    Thanks to plot complications, Cady has joined the mean girls of the title in a Christmas talent show. Dressed in Santa hats, higher elf drag, and go-go boots, the four girls come out to dance to “Jingle Bell Rock.” It is a given within the history of the school that the mean girls always “win” the contest.

     

    Mean Girls

     

    Lohan as Cady dances the other girls off the fucking screen. It’s a moment of revelation, like Astaire, or Kelly, or Travolta in their first films, and one regret for her fans among Lohan’s tumultuous life and career direction is that dancing has been minimized (her mother was briefly a Rockette). Her co-stars are no mean achievers themselves. Chief meanie Rachel McAdams went on to pop fame in  A Walk to Remember and  Red Eye; Lacey Chabert will be seen shortly in the  Black Christmas remake; and the exotic looking Amanda Seyfried has appeared in  Veronica Mars and the HBO show  Big Love. And this is not to put them down, but none of them evince the absolute joy in movement, the confidence and sassiness that define both a great dancer and a mega star.

    How many lives does Lohan have left? Has Lohan indeed not become a mean girl on her own (abusing Disneyland staff, for example) in what readers of magazines take to be her private life? If so, too bad, because Lohan has the potential to be the next great screen star, a new Julia Roberts, able to straddle romantic comedies and Oscar winning dramas.

    Lohan built a lot of good will with that scene and that movie. But she wasn’t able to capitalize on it. What she needed to do was to solidify public love with another romantic comedy, just as Julia Roberts consolidated public affection generated by  Mystic Pizza and  Steel Magnolias by leaping into  Pretty Woman. She needed to appear across from a man of equal or higher stature so that she can share it and feed off it.Instead, she opted for serious indie-hood by appearing in a Robert Altman film, which is a crap shoot, since his films are so uneven and few people go see them. Normally I wouldn’t care to dwell on the career aspect of an actress (these thoughts, by the way, are a tacit admision of one’s real inferiorty in the face of the mean girl in Lohan), but I like her so much I want to see more of her movies (just as I want her mirror image, Storm Large, to keep going on  Rock Star even though I don’t want her to win). But of her forthcoming films –   Speechless, an updating of  Cyrano based on an  L. Sprague De Camp story;  Chapter 27, the second of two forthcoming movies about Mark David Chapman;  A Woman of No Importance, the Oscar Wilde play directed by the unpromising  Janusz Kaminski (and which will require a British acceent?),  Bobby, another assassination story, this one about the night Kennedy was shot  – only one,  Georgia Rule, sounds like they might fit this bill  sounds like it might fit the bill, partially because the cast is strong (Jane Fonda, Felicity Huffman, Dermot Mulroney, Cary Elwes) and is directed by  Pretty Woman‘s Gary Marshall (who has, unfortunately, been dreadful lately. In fact, he was dreadful in Pretty Woman but the movie transcended its ineptitude). In almost all of these productions, Lohan has garnered headlines about her behavior, on and off the set.

    Lohan is a new breed of star whom most adults probably don’t understand. Like Mandy Moore, Jessica Simpson, and Hilary Duff, they are singer-actors, who feud with each other across the pages of competing tabloids. They have high school-ized the media and live their lives in contra-distinction to the “moral lessons” their movies tell, like the mean girls they play against. Even a  New York Times article in May of 2006 fretted out loud about Lohan burning herself out. But Lohan is clearly resilient. She has already had nine lives, and unlike the cat of the fable, may have nine more before she’s through.

    Lohan

     

    1) Started out as a young Natalie Wood, in the Shirley Temple – Lolita mode, a preternaturally talented and charismatic child actress.

    2)  As a “Disney star” with all that means about living up to a certain style or standard of kid behavior and fealty to parents. (Are actors auteurs? Can a kid star be said to choose films that reflect her personality? Can thematic  similarities be found among the young star’s films?)

    3)  As a “Tweener” star, hinting at sex and boys without explicit references.

    4) In an alternate career as Lindsay the singer, with two albums out.

    5) In the real world, as a “Law and Order” victim of her dad’s hi-jinks.

    6)  As she matured, as the jilted lover pulling an Ava Gardner going to war with the tabloid and paparazzi and indulging in self-destructive behavior.

    7)  Thanks to the Altman film and a few others coming up, as a future indie queen.

    8)  As an actor – auteur. But are actors auteurs? Can a kid be said to choose films that reflect her personality?

    9) But ultimately, there is Lindsay,  the sexy dancer, the new Ann-Margret, waiting first for her  Bye Bye Birdie, and then for her  Carnal Knowledge.

     

    Just My Luck title

    Just My Luck is directed by Donald Petrie, who was probably a good choice. He has had a few 100 million dollar hits, and he was the sherpa for one of Roberts’s best early performances in  Mystic Pizza. He has a knack for working with sex symbols (as in   The Favor), but is helpless before a bad or indifferent script, such as the one with which  Just My Luck is burdened, credited to a smorgasbord of writers, among them I. Marlene King (Senior Trip), Amy Harris (Sex and the City), Jonathan Bernstein, James Greer, and Mark Blackwell ( Max Keeble’s Big Move). 

     

    Deleted

     

    You can tell that many hands (but no Lohan) were involved in the composition because they can’t even keep straight the definition of look, as other reviewers have noted, as it tells of a curiously lucky girl (she was named homecoming queen of a high school she didn’t even go to) in one of those vague Manhattan comedy jobs whose luck is transfered to a loser (Chris Pine)  . The supplementary material doesn’t help much. There are three deleted scenes, only one of which is substantial and could have stood to remain in the movie, plus there is the short featurette “Look of Luck,” and a behind-the-scenes look at the band, McFly, that figures in the plot.

    The disc has a fine widescreen transfer with a full frame transfer on the B side.  Just My Luck hit the street on Tuesday, August 22nd, and retails for $29.95.

     

  • Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review and director interview, Head Trauma

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    Director Lance Weiler can’t stay out of the woods.

    You remember Lance Weiler don’t you? In 1998 he co-wrote and co-directed The Last Broadcast. That was the historic indie film that was simultaneously screened in numerous theaters around the country via then-groundbreaking satellite technology. It seemed to be the techno wave of movie exhibition’s future, and though occasionally someone in the movie business predicts that satellite broadcasts will soon supersede celluloid, it hasn’t yet come to pass, partially because DVDs and digital home download have edged it out.

    The Last Broadcast was also famous for turning out to be a potential inspiration for The Blair Witch Project, sort of the way that City on Fire popped up surprisingly as a precursor to Reservoir Dogs. They tell similar tales. In The Last Broadcast, some filmmakers and a “psychic” take to the Pine Barrens in search of the Jersey Devil. The film features some beautiful footage of the woods by day and night The Last Broadcast proved to be a true indie film (made for $900 dollars), that proved to be a well-made and cleverly twisted tale of hubris and insanity.

    His latest film, the excellent Head Trauma, also shows traces of the lure of the forest (as does his next film, but more about that in a minute), and Weiler, helming and writing alone this time (his cinematic partner, Stefan Avalos, has his own shot-on-and-sent-direct-to video film, The Ghosts of Edendale, from 2003. Those familiar with Last Broadcast will see similar themes: mysterious figures in the forest, interpersonal incompetence, hubris, and a narrative twist that takes the center of the film and points it back at itself (if that makes any sense).

    Head Trauma title

    Head Trauma tells the story of one George Walker (Vince Mola, a sort of Francis Ford Coppola clone). After living on the road or in the streets for some 20 years, he returns to the home of his late grandmother, now a condemned structure in a lower middle class neighborhood. With the help of Julian (Jamil A.C. Mangan) the African American youth next door, who is also a gifted cartoonist, George attempts to clean up the house and rescind the condemnation, in the face of obstacles from an old high school rival who stands to profit from its destruction. Also impeding George’s labors are the bad dreams he has, in which mysterious images rattle around in his head, among them a small feminine figure whose features are obscured by a large hood (like the running girl in Don’t Look Now), and some disturbing activity in a wooded field, a hanging and a large sleeping bag being hauled away.

    George

     

    Head Trauma </i> is a psychological thriller of precision and insight. George is a not particularly sympathetic character, it soon turns out, and he tends to destroy potential relationships before they even happen, especially with an old flame from the neighborhood, Mary (Mary Monahan). He doesn’t need his old rival to sabotage his house, as George is fully capable of sabotaging himself.

    Head Trauma Mary

    Although at first it seems like Head Trauma is going to be an “old dark house” horror film, it is in reality loosely part of the tradition of thrillers that include An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge, Jacob’s Ladder, and Angel Heart, speaking broadly, but with some of the suspense created by the unseen and by psychological tensions found in the films of Polanski and Roeg. Weiler has a knack for making empty rooms in daylight and the woods in the afternoon feel ominous.

    Weiler’s script is a lean, mean machine, with no fat on it and with little or anything that can qualify as a subplot. The film is creepy, with additional help from the excellent music and sound production, and – in a phase that I hope will soon disappear from the reviewer’s syntax – for a film shot on HD video looks fantastic, very controlled and precise. There are even superb arial shots.

    Lance Weiler

    Head Trauma was released theatrically in several markets in mid-August, before its September 26 release on DVD on the Heretic label. Despite Weiler’s hectic schedule I managed to extract a brief interview with him about his cinematic past, present, and future. Weiler proved to be an ageless lad who could easily have a career in front of the camera as behind it, and is an articulate, passionate lover of movies of all kinds.

    It seems to me that the movie industry is a little short sighted in not taking up the technological breakthroughs established in your first film. Having made the history-making The Last Broadcast, did you still find it hard to capitalize on its success to advance to the “next step” of your career, so to speak?

    In some respects yes and others no. In a lot of ways we were ahead of the curve in terms of the way we made and distributed TLB. So we found ourselves at a strange place. On one hand people respected what we’d done on the other they had no clue. Sometimes people get hung up on aspects of the work. For instance they’d say TLB – that’s a nice documentary but can you do narrative? They miss the point. Sometimes the tech aspects got in the way of the story but I think it’s always some type of a struggle to get the work made and to get it seen.

    What was the genesis of Head Trauma?
    HEAD TRAUMA comes out of two life experiences that took me very dark places The first was a head on collision with a garbage truck that almost killed me. Twelve years ago I was laying in a hospital bed with a severe head injury and my jaw wired shut. I could have died that day, stupidly I wasn’t wearing my seatbelt – my jaw snapped the steering wheel and my head busted the windshield and thankfully I lost consciousness. After the accident I was plagued by vivid nightmares of the crash until one day they just stopped.

    Flash forward to 2000 and I’m pitching a TV show to some major networks. After a year of pitching we land at a network and after a roller coaster ride that takes another two years of the show being on again / off again we received money to shoot a pilot. Working on the show ranks as one of the worst professional experiences I’ve had. At times it really felt like I was a tenant farmer not a co-creator executive of a major network show. In the end we shot a great pilot but it died a slow painful death and I felt like I went through the five stages of grief.So in the winter of 2003 when I was feeling like shit and unsure of what to do a couple simple words change my path. I owe a huge thanks to my wife Jennifer for simply saying “Do what you love just make another movie.” It’s so simple and obvious but at the time I was out of my head. And that’s the series of events that created HEAD TRAUMA.

     

    Ghost

    Why make a “horror” film? Why that genre,rather than another, or just a straightforward drama? What does horror offer you or inspire in you that, at least in this case, creatively you can’t get elsewhere?
    I love the horror genre. There is something interesting to me about exercising those demons, those dark things that rest in one’s mind – it’s a way to get them out of your own head and do something productive with them. I’ve had some dark times in my life. When I was younger I drown and at the age of 14 my house burnt down, and then a number of years ago I was in a horrible car accident. I always like to have some autobiographical element within my films. Water and fire play an important role within HEAD TRAUMA as does the concept of a blow to the head.

    Given that it is a lot easier to make movies these days, what remains the most difficult aspect of filmmaking?
    By far the most difficult aspect of filmmaking these days isn’t a production issue it’s a promotion / distribution issue. With over 20,000 feature films being made due to the boom in digital production the chances of a film being seen past a film festival are rare. On top of that releasing a truly independent film into today’s market with out millions for P&A can be very difficult. But thanks to the web there are ways to build an audience and get the word out in very effective ways. For instance the web comic for HEAD TRAUMA is not a normal film site http://headtraumamovie.com – it is an interactive comic with some twisted stuff hidden under the surface. It becomes an extension of the story. Now more than ever it is important to create extra value for the fans. With HEAD TRAUMA I’m working hard to give a good presentation from start to finish. I’ve been on the other end and I know what type of things hook me in – that is really the issue knowing your audience and then the trick is finding a way to get the work to them.

    Can you give us a hint about what you might be working on next?
    Yeah it’s a really dark and twisted flick set in the remote wilderness. It’s based on an actual experience of my life that occurred while I hiked a part of the Application Trail called the “Wilderness.” The AT is a wild place and being alone for 10 to 12 days with no civilization in sight can be a very creepy.

    Bissette

    Here’s a preview of the supplements on the Head Trauma disc. Not only is there a detailed audio commentary track with Weiler, but there are several relatively short but informative makings ofs, one about how the crew blew up a car, another on the man who help shot the ariel shots, an interview with comic book artist S. R. Bissette and his son on the comics they created for the film, some cast interviews, and a piece on the film’s music. Bissette will be very familiar to readers of QuickStopEntertainment as one of the artists on Swamp Thing and numerous other comics, including some independent work in recent years.

    John Madgic

    As with the extras on The Last Broadcast, the supplements are uninhibited, and Weiler and his collaborators are articulate raconteurs. Finally, there are trailers for both Head Trauma and The Last Broadcast.

  • Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review, Radioland Murders

     

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    A few years ago I went to a local theatrical production in a small venue that catered to small troupes doing original material. The play (I forget the title) was a satire on radio mystery dramas in the spirit of the Firesign Theater’s Nick Danger. 

    About halfway through the play it suddenly occurred to me: what the fuck are these people doing drawing on old time radio for their dramatic inspiration? This is 2003? How many people in this room have even  heard an old radio show? In fact, has this young cast itself even heard many radio shows?

    Box

     

    Still, I think I know the impetus behind the show, which was probably the same impetus behind the movie George Lucas produced,  Radioland Murders, from 1994. The hectic world of on the air broadcasting creates a dynamic, vivid environment that pays homage to an earlier, fun time and which allows actors to ham it up. Lucas was probably also inspired by the 1940s films set in the world of radio, such as the Red Skelton “Whistler” series. When you are a kid, those movies seem like perfect films, blending horror and comedy and suspense, like  Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein. It’s the same original honorific impulse behind  Star Wars.

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    In the end, though,  Radioland Murders, credited to writers Willard Huyck and Gloria Katz and Jeff Reno and Ron Osborn, from a story by Lucas, and directed by Mel Smith, a comic actor and writer who has directed six movies so far, is no  Star Wars. I’m tempted to say that it is Lucas’s  Hudson Hawk, but he already has one in  Howard the Duck.

    TV

     

    The whole spirit of  Radioland Murders is based on frenzy and fast talk, except that here the talk isn’t funny. Its premise is a distant relative of that joke in Spielberg’s  1941 when the sailors on the sub complain about the cumbersome size of non-transistor radios. The trick here is that the secret killer behind the spree is an inventor of television. The only time I laughed during any moment in the film’s 112 minutes was when the police detective (Michael Lerner) found he had to pull his officers away from the hypnotizing effect of the tube, which is only showing the famous Native American splash screen.

    The film has an all – star cast, filled mostly with people who are still around and still widely viewed as “funny,” from Brian Benben as the harried head writer of the radio network, WBN, making its debut one night in1939, and Jeffrey Tambor as a director who is also the first victim. In between are Mary Stuart Masterson as Benben’s wife (who makes a surprisingly effective ’30s type star in the Jennifer Jason Leigh manner; she and Benben are supposed to be Curt Henderson’s parents from  American Graffiti, set 23 years later), Ned Beatty as the network owner, George Burns as a comic (it’s his last film), Brion James, Michael McKean as a faux Spike Jones, Stephen Tobolowsky, Christopher Lloyd  as the sound effects guy, Larry Miller, Corbin Bernsen as an announcer, Rosemary Clooney, Bobcat Goldthwait as one of the network’s many unpaid writers, Dylan Baker as a cop, Candy Clark and Bo Hopkins reunited again after  American Graffiti, Robert Klein, Harvey Korman, Joey Lawrence, and Peter MacNicol. It’s not that there are too many of them, but that when they are there what they have to do isn’t funny. The blend of death and humor isn’t easy here as it is in the film’s inspirations, especially in scenes such as the one where Larry Miller is crushed bloodily between giant gears. And this is a show that so doesn’t understand radio that one of the talents performing on its opening night is a dance act.

    The disc for  Radioland Murders  is as bare bones as a disc gets that doesn’t just start with the movie and have no menu, like a David Lynch disc. You can’t chose your chapter breaks (for the record there are 18 chapters) but it does have the trailer and the “option” of English track and / or subtitles. One peculiarity of the film, or at least this transfer, is that it does not bear a title. There is no title at the beginning, and none in the end credits. Curious.

  • The Fred Hembeck Show: Episode 70 – Whither Emmy?

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    Where WAS she?

    Where was Ellen Burstyn the other night during the Emmy Awards ceremonies? Unlike a majority of that evening’s nominees, she wasn’t in the audience, carefully preparing a spontaneous speech in her head in case she won, the way many of her peers undoubtedly were. No, the Oscar winning actress wasn’t anywhere to be found.

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    Gee, are we to assume Ellen WASN’T burstin’ with pride over scoring a nomination for a 14 second appearance in HBO’s Mrs Harris telefilm? That move–long and loudly ridiculed by many, including host Conan O’Brien (the only reason I tuned into a show I generally skip, by the way)–nonetheless stubbornly wasn’t rescinded by either the Emmy bigwigs nor graciously refused by the otherwise silent Ms. Burstyn herself, but I think there’s a bigger question here than an incompetent nominating process.

    Such as, who exactly hires an Academy Award winning actress for their high profile project and then provides her with all of a scant 38 words to deliver? Huh? Who does something that screwy anyway?

    The two leads–Annette Bening and Ben Kingsley–each own one of those golden little statues themselves, as chance might have it. Gee, ya don’t think that, maybe at the last minute, they got cold feet, afraid that one too many similarly honored thespians on set would somehow drain the spotlight from them, do ya?

    “Hey, cut down Burstyn’s part, willya? Don’t even give her character a name–just tell her to use a funny accent. Keep the focus on us two–THAT’LL sure help our Emmy chances!”

    Well, of course it didn’t.

    And yeah, it woulda been one thing if Burstyn had herself an unannounced cameo, or was given the old “Special Appearance By” billing, but it’s my understanding (hey, I didn’t actually SEE the movie, although thanks to the cheeky Emmy broadcast Producers, I DID view most of the nominated performance–that sure was 14 transcendent seconds, lemme tell ya!…) that the cast list just rolled out alphabetically, with Ms. Burstyn’s role seemingly given the same amount of weight as performers who actually had to spend more time than a coffee break memorizing their lines! So, blame the Emmys if you must, but just remember–some genius hired this women, paid her good money, and THEN decided, y’know, 14 seconds is pretty much all we’re gonna need of HER!

    And while I’m righteously whining about the awards, two more complaints:

    How is it that My Name Is Earl didn’t manage to grab itself a slot in the final five selections of the Best Comedy category, but then when it came to naming Best Achievement in Comedy Writing and Best Achievement Comedy Directing, BOTH awards went to the pilot episode of Earl? What–was it all downhill after the series premiere, with the likes of Two and A Half Men easily outscoring it on the yock meter? (Look, I’ll confess to never having seen the latter, and to thoroughly enjoying the former, but it just makes no sense the way things played out in those three categories. I DO believe that, perhaps by blind luck alone, the funniest comedy–at least to MY taste–The Office, won. But Earl should’ve gotten a nomination nod, especially if the show’s writing and directing were seemingly held in such high esteem… )

    Then there’s Desperate Housewives. A big winner last year, and a show I faithfully watch (hey, it all started with me because of Teri Hatcher, and things just developed from there), its sophomore season was almost entirely frozen out of ceremony. Now, I’m not amongst those who felt the quality dropped as precipitously as a lot of folk, though admittedly, the plot lines weren’t as well constructed as they were during the program’s debut season. And while I’ll always have a problem with shows like this one, Ally McBeal (which I’ve never watched), and Gilmore Girls (which I enjoy immensely) being measured up right alongside half hour sitcoms, I can begrudgingly understand it, considering the amount of effective comedic moments given to each of the lead actresses. But if there was one character who clearly WASN’T funny last season, it was new neighbor Alfre Woodward.

    So who do you think gets nominated for Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy? Uh huh–the women who spent most of the year hiding her mentally challenged son chained in the basement, believing him (wrongly, as it turns out) responsible for a young woman’s death back in the town where they last lived! Sounds like a regular laugh riot, huh? Believe me, if anything, THAT was the plot primarily responsible for dragging the show down during its second season–so what do the Emmy Einsteins decide to do?

    Yup–foist a nomination on the actress who embodied that downer storyline! (Nothing against Ms. Woodward herself, mind you, just the wrongheaded decision-making that gave her this unmerited salute. Her acting may’ve been swell, but trust me, she WASN’T funny–simply because the part wasn’t WRITTEN funny! No wacky antics in THAT cellar, I’m afraid! But considering Ms. Woodward was also nominated for her work in another movie or miniseries–my apologies, but the details are starting to blend together–apparently, she’s a reliably talented actress who’s also an Emmy favorite. Anyway, I’ve gotta give her SOME credit–she certainly had to work a heckuva lot harder than Ellen Burstyn did for the privilege of remaining comfortably in her seat not once, but twice, on Emmy evening!…)

    Look, like I said, I only watched because Conan was hosting. If they had let–oh, I don’t know?–Tony Danza host, I probably wouldn’t be moaning about any of this now.

    Except, of course, just HOW could they possibly they let Tony Danza host anyway?…

    Speaking of which–check out Tony Danza.com! You might be surprised…

    Copyright 2006 Fred Hembeck

  • Music For The Masses: August 31st, 2006

     

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    Hola, mi amigos! Que Pasa?  It is I, M.C., fresh from vacationing in Southern California or, if you prefer, Northern Mexico.  I gotta tell you, friends, I had an ABSOLUTE blast, although, I will fully admit that I was more than a tad disappointed to find out that Walt’s version of a Fantasyland didn’t include a “Drunken Stewardess” ride, a Carmen Electra ride or even a “Butterfly” fuck swing.  And get this, in Disneyland, “ATM” apparently means a machine that dispenses money.  Who knew?  Oh well, to each their own I guess.  By the way. . .Walt?  I think it might be time for you to call out an exterminator because it appears that you have one hell of a rat infestation.  Seriously, those little sons-a-bitches were EVERYWHERE and, from the looks of things, some of them may be rabid. . .
      

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    Hey. . .how about a big round of applause for Double A who, as he would say, “be all fillin’ in n’ shit” while I was away?  Not too shabby what with the “rocking it old school,” huh?  I’ll tell you, friends, I’m so damn proud of him.  It’s kinda like I’m the Brittany to his K-Fed.  Wow, that’s creepy.  I just realized that comparison really hits the mark because much like K-Fed, Double A can’t rap for shit and, much like Brittany, I appear to giving birth to a baby elephant.  Seriously. . .I’ll even show you the trunk.
     

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    Wait a minute. . .considering that I’ve never left you kids with a baby-sitter and before we get much further, maybe I should ask you some questions.  So, ahh, did Double A do anything. . .umm, weird while I was gone?  He didn’t do anything to make you uncomfortable, did he?  Force you to play “Hide The Thumb?”Â  How about “Catholic Confessional with Father Finger?”Â  “The Pants-less Ventriloquist?”Â  Anything like that?  I tell you what, I know you may be uncomfortable talking about all this, so how about you just show me on the dolly where he touched you. . .
     

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    Hmmm.  Too shy to talk about your naughty spots, huh?  Well, that’s okay.   Tell you what, if you have a repressed memory bubble to the surface, you let me know and I’ll be all over Double A like eyeliner on Dave Navarro.  I promise you THAT!
     

    So, anyway. . .enough about all of that.  We have some new releases to look at this week, namely the ones from the Gin Blossoms and Rose Hill Drive, plus, Double A checks in with a review of the new Outkast effort for the movie Idlewild. Should be interesting this week, especially considering that my Grandpa is checking in with his first ever review on the recent Christina Aguilera disc.  Good stuff.  So, what do you say?  Let’s get to it, shall we??!! 
     

    m4m-august31-gb_mlv Artist: Gin Blossoms
    Album: Major Lodge Victory
    Bastard Love Child of: The Byrds and The Replacements
    Best for: Cruising down Mill Avenue with Stipp while debating the “musical” merits of Samantha Fox.

     

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    “Chatty Kathy” is the one on the far right there.
     

    Easily, one of the most surreal rock and roll moments I have ever had occurred at a Gin Blossoms concert waaaayyyyy back in 1993 a.d..  I had gone to this cool, little venue outside of Ft. Collins called the Mishawaka Inn to see a band that I had helped to locally promote, Toad the Wet Sprocket.  Ever heard of “˜em?  Great fucking band.  Anyway, opening that night was a group of guys I had never heard of, the Gin Blossoms.  (Editor’s note:  this was about 2 months before “Hey Jealousy” took over the airwaves, the charts and MTV. . .yes, back when they played videos). 
     

    There I was, before the show, taking a piss, same as I usually do after drinking 8 to 10 beers in rapid succession, when this long, blonde-haired, slightly effeminate-looking guy saunters up and stands RIGHT next to me.  He could have chosen any number of open and spacious slots, but, for whatever reason, he chose to throw down next to me.  Granted, he might not have had a choice as earlier that night, I’d thrown on a little Obsession®.
     
     

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    So there we were, the three of us. . .me, the blonde guy and some dude in a stall who, from the sounds of things, was making balloon animals.  Obviously, the forced and unnecessary proximity had me more than a little “creeped” out, but again, I WAS wearing Obsession® so I let it slide.  But then, this blonde-haired dude did TWO, yes, TWO things that a dude NEVER does in a dude’s restroom (THREE, technically, if you count standing right next to someone in non-crowded shitter).  First, the guy turns to me and says, “Damn, that water’s cold!” and he shoots me a grin.  Seriously!  He fucking talked to me!  While I was pissing!  Like we were just “hangin’ around” with nothing better to do.  I was completely dumbfounded and disoriented, but before I could stop myself,  I fired back, “Yeah. . .and it’s deep, too.”Â  Good lord, if I’d had a free hand at that moment, I would’ve slapped myself in the forehead.
     

    Then, perhaps emboldened by his urinary-centric male bonding efforts, the guy cocks his head (no pun intended), leans in a bit and sneaks a peak at my junk.  I shit you not.  Maybe he was seeing if my comment was true.  Maybe he was calculating potential fit.  I honestly didn’t know, nor did I care.  I was outta there.  Usually one to luxuriate a bit during “the shake,” I instead quickly zipped and bolted back to my friends who were camped out in front of the stage.  Hell, I didn’t even stop to wash my hands or fluff and primp the mullet.
     

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    There he is again. . .second from the left.
     

    Long story longer, after regaling my friends with the tale of a men’s room encounter gone horribly awry and enduring a solid, twenty minutes of “did he need a microscope” jokes, the opening band, the Gin Blossoms, bounded on stage, grabbed their instruments and ripped into their first number.   Being right next to the stage, I actually had to crane my neck to see the band and, as I did so, I looked right up into the face of the Peek-a-boo Pisser.  The guy from the restroom turned out to be the band’s rhythm guitarist and, as I was motioning to my buddy’s that THAT was the guy, the guitarist looked down, gave me the “nod,” smiled and winked.  Apparently, I’d made an impression.
     

    Of course, it’s been a long time now since I’ve heard from this friend, whose name is actually Scotty Johnson.  In fact, it’s been almost 10 years since anyone’s heard from the Gin Blossoms.  But after a small, yet successful smattering of live “reunion” shows to support their recent Greatest Hit’s compilation, the band (singer Robin Wilson, lead guitarist Jesse Valenzuela and bassist Bill Leen) hit the studio to record some new material.  The result is Major Lodge Victory, a hook-heavy new release that goes a long way in recapturing the band’s “heyday sound.”Â Â  No, this is not an album that attempts to re-define rock’n’roll, but rather a worthy attempt to recapture the pre-grunge explosion, pop-rock popularity that the Blossoms once enjoyed.  And in that, they are extremely successful.  All of the songs here are solid, but the standouts for me are the first single, “Learning the Hard Way,” the vocal showcase of “Someday Soon” and one of the catchiest songs I’ve heard in awhile, “Let’s Play Two.”Â  Good, solid, vintage Gin Blossoms through and through.
     

    This is a great new album from a band that I’ve sorely missed.  Sure, their guitarist is solely responsible for turning me into a stall-pisser and I haven’t worn Obsession® since, but if that’s the price for having them back. . .so be it.
     

    Rating:  4 out of 5
     

    m4m-august31-rhd Artist: Rose Hill Drive
    Album: Rose Hill Drive
    Bastard Love Child of: The Led Zeppelin and Triumph (the band, not the insult comic dog)
    Best for: Proving that the Denver music scene actually has something “meaty” to offer.

    I’ll be the first to admit that Denver (et al) is hardly a “musical hot spot” here in the U.S., ESPECIALLY when you compare it to places like L.A., Chicago, New York, Nashville or, umm. . .Dubuque.  I mean, sure, we gave the world The Foggy Mountain Fuckers, Lying Bitch and the Restraining Orders and, of course, The Fray, who single-handedly caused the automobile-related instances of dry-humping, crazed fingerings and awkward oral in the teenage population to sky-rocket, but otherwise, we haven’t had a whole lot to offer the world, musically speaking.  Until now.
     

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    Starting a few years back, there was a buzz around town centered on a hot, new power trio that was tearing up bars in and around their hometown of Boulder, Colorado.  Named after the street where they grew up, Rose Hill Drive, featuring brothers Daniel (19) and Jake (21) Sproul on lead guitar and bass, respectively, and childhood bud, Nate Barnes (21), behind the kit, had quickly managed to become the “must-see” band in the Denver area.  So see them I did.  Twice.  And let me tell you, friends. . .holy shit.   I still get chills (and there multiplyin’. . .it’s electrifyin’!) thinking back to the first time I saw these boys play.  Think:  the intensity of live Zeppelin with the virtuoso performances of Rush. . .heady comparisons, I know, especially invoking the names of two of my all-time favorite bands, but I’m not joking.  I hadn’t seen anything like it in quite some time.  
     

    Needless to say, I have been anxiously awaiting the release of this groups self-titled, debut album for some time now.  And, after giving it a few, initial run-throughs, I gotta say. . .I’m a bit disappointed.  Wait, wait. . .NOT in the way that you might think.  This new disc is packed with an amazing array of songs that alternate between pure, driving, riff-laden rock anthems to bluesy, pure-toned ballads.  Numerous songs on this disc, namely the album opener, “Showdown,” with it’s in-your-face guitar riff and the driving, “Raise Your Hands,” have an immediate and classic feel that will make you fully understand the Zeppelin reference above.  On the contrary, this disc has shown a melodic sensibility and musical craftsmanship that I wouldn’t have expected from these “kids.”
     
     

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    And there in lies the rub.  You see, as good as this disc is, (oh, and it IS good, nay, great) it does ZERO justice to the insane and blistering live shows that these guys put on.  THAT is a crying shame.  Sure, it’s hard to capture the type of energy that these guys put out on stage in a studio setting, but I’m betting that a more raw, less polished production would have served these guys better on this outing.  Yes, I’m a nit-picky little bitch.  Whatever.  Luckily, with the recent resurgence of the classic rock sound and the success of bands like Wolfmother, Rose Hill Drive is destined for stardom and will undoubtedly have ample time to experiment with this notion next time out.  Seriously, folks, I highly recommend this disc, but understand this. . .it pales in comparison to their live shows
     

    Rating:  5 out of 5
     

    AND NOW A WORD FROM DOUBLE A. . .

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    You know, I’ve never really jumped on the whole Outkast bandwagon.  Sure I enjoyed a few of their songs, but really, they’ve always been pretty boring to me.  There certainly hasn’t been enough on an Outkast album to make me run out and actually buy one.  So at this point you may be asking yourself why did I pick up the groups latest album ?  That is a question that only my therapist can answer, because I really don’t know.  It may have something to do with the fact that I have an irrational fear of wooden spoons and spandex.  I honestly cannot say.  There were other albums that have come out recently that I could have opted for, but no, I chose to get an album from a group that I’m not really into.  Go figure.  

    I’ve seen the previews for the movie Idlewild and it looks pretty good, but to call this album the soundtrack to the film is not quite right.  Sure the songs from the movie are on the disc but there are other normal songs on the album as well.  I guess you could call it a companion album, much like Tom Cruise and Katie Holms are “companions.”Â  Sure they look pretty standing next to each other, but really, they just don’t belong together. 
     
     

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    The strange thing about this album is that the soundtrack songs are the best songs on the disc.  Seeing as the movie takes place in the 1920s, all the songs have a great jazzy feel to them.  The tempos are fast paced and the lyrics flow really well.  The best song on the album is “PJ and Rooster.”Â  With piano and trumpet backing up Andre 3000’s unique vocal styling, this song just flat out kicks.  Of course the song probably makes a bit more sense when the context of the movie is known, but one doesn’t need to know the movie to dig the song.
     

    On the flip side, the normal raps fall a little short to the soundtrack songs.  They are not bad, but they are nothing special either.  Take for example the song “Hollywood Divorce.”Â  Featuring guest appearances by Lil’ Wayne and Snoop Dog, the song just never gets going.  In fact, listening to it actually sounds like three different songs all mashed together.  With the two guests and Andre 3000 all going in completely different directions, the song just seems to stumble through its 5:23 running time.  The track “Morris Brown” is the best of the “normal” songs.  Sounding like a cross between the regular raps and the soundtrack songs, it has a nice funky beat with some clever lyrics. 
     

    Many people are saying that this is going to be the last Outkast album, as Andre 3000 and his partner Big Boi have actually not really worked together in making the last two albums.  If they go their separate ways?  Eh, no biggie.  I think I could continue to live.  Oh and on the back of the album, there’s a picture of a rooster on a microphone.  I’m assuming that this means Outkast likes to rub their penis’ on microphones, but that is only conjecture on my part.

    Rating:  3 out of 5

    REVIEWS. . .

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    by Grandpa
     

    Christina Aguilera
    Back To Basics

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    My goodness she’s a pretty one. Reminds me of a young Linda Treverse. It’s awful nice of her to put such a pretty picture of herself on the cover like this. Heck, if I were a younger man I’d pin this here photo up over my work table. No bother doing it now ““ seeing as how my parts don’t work. Haven’t since Korea.  I hear there is medicine for that now, but I take enough medicine.  Most of it for the gout.

    I use to have a picture of Rita Hayworth over my desk and I would stare at that thing for hours. Boy howdy.  In fact, I’ll tell you right here, boy. . .sometimes, I’d picture Rita there, when I was with your grandmother.  You see, it helped get me over them gawd-awful child-bearing hips and that gal-darn hairy chin. Looked like Burl Ives or some such nonsense.  You know?  That image was the sole thing that kept my marriage together and the reason you’re here today.  Nope, my wife, your gran-mammy never looked half as good as Rita”¦ or this Christina Augl”¦aga”¦lera. What’s that?  Hell, with a name like that she must be a Spaniard. I remember, back in WWII, meeting a girl named Christina while I was fightin’ in Spain. I wonder if she’s a relation.  Hmmm. 

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    I don’t know much about much, but the music on this contraption sounds like a cat in heat”¦ all “rrrrrr, rrrrr”. . .with drums.  Like the one time that tractor trailer ran through our cabbage field in early May, Aught 8.  I always liked watching the Wheel of Fortune, but I just turned my hearing aids off and stopped listening to this. . .this cat diddlin’.  After a spell, I just sat there starring at the picture. That girl, I’ll tell you what. If Eisenhower was still alive he’d show her a good time, tell you THAT right now.  And you can take THAT to the bank there, mister. 

    Well, there you have it friends.  That’s going to do it for me and the gang this week, so, until next time, keep wearing it proud and playing it loud!
     

    Send your repressed memories, review copies, presents and assorted hate mail to:

    M.C. Bell
    P.O. Box 1222
    Arvada, CO 80001

     

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    This one’s for you, Stipp.  Enjoy!

     

    E-MAIL THE AUTHOR | ARCHIVES 

     

     

     

     

  • Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review, Eric Rohmer’s Six Moral Tales

     

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    If only poor old (really old) Eric Rohmer hadn’t called his set of six films “moral tales.” Made “out of order” between 1963 and 1972 and based on stories that Rohmer wrote some 10 or more years earlier, some of the Moral Tales are feature length and some of them shorts, some of them in color and some – necessarily  – black and white, but there is a consistency to the set, as each film deals, according to the director, with a man who, though destined for one woman, is temporarily sidetrack, for the length of the movie, by another. 

    Call them Six Romantic Tales, or Six Paradoxical Tales, or just plain Six Tales. Had Rohmer done so, he would have staved off decades of critical machinations over the “morality” of the films, and spared himself a lot of  tsuris having to explain and re-explain himself.  When he came to his next collectively named sets, he did just that, calling one of them “Tales of the Four Seasons” and the other “Comedies et Proverbs” – all vague enough to allow the director some liturgical leeway and stolid enough to give a sense of finality to the critical compass.

    Rohmer and Schroeder

     

    You can see what he got himself into on the new, fabulous Criterion set of the Six Moral Tales. On the disc for  The Bakery Girl of Monceau in the set, Criterion includes “Moral Tales, Filmic Issues,” an 80 minute conversation or interview between Rohmer and the films’ producer, Barbet Schroeder, who is of course an internationally known director in his own right. When they get to the title, once again Rohmer ties himself in verbal knots trying to explain it. The confusion may be the difference between the languages. French speakers might well know exactly what is meant by “moral tales,” but English speakers bring different connotations to the phrase. But on the disc for  La Collectionneuse Rohmer is interrogated for an hour by two French Canadian TV critics about his life and career and yet again, the intricacies of the title demand explanation. It didn’t help that the most famous of the batch, My Night at Maud’s, featured lengthy digressions on the meaning of Pascal and had a guy wrestle with casually sleeping with a gay divorcee.

    Bakery Girl

     

    If My Night at Maud’s and Claire’s Knee are the most well known of the Rohmer tales, the early shorts that form the first two parts of the series are the least well know, by anybody, and it is a joy to have them so readily available, with all the others. In fact it is interesting to ponder these two shorts has bearing in miniature the concerns of the later, more complex films. It becomes clear that Rohmer does not necessarily sympathize with or admire his male protagonists, and that one of the key hurdles the viewer has to get past is the disparity between what characters say about themselves, even in voice over, and what the movie reveals about them. The Bakery Girl of Monceau is the first and the shortest of the films, and concerns a man (Barbet Schroeder) who juggles a girl named Sylvie (Michele Giardon) and a baker’s assistant, Jacqueline (Claudine Soubrier), later cruelly dumping the lower class girl. The film sets the tone – yes, the moral tone – for the films to follow. The 23-minute Bakery Girl was completed in 1963 and so was the hour long Suzanne’s Career, which tells of Bertrand (Philippe Beuzen), the less romantically successful friend of rake Guillaume (Christian Charriere), and who almost dates Guillaum’s ex-girlfriend Suzanne (Catherine See), but indecision prevails.

     

    Adrien

     

    As in a Neil LaBute film, both men are horrible, the weakling and the strong one. Thus we are prepped for fully understanding the character of Adrien (Patrick Bachau), the preening art dealer in the fourth film of the series, and another lesser known one,  La Collectionneuse, who takes a vacation from his girlfriend to stay with an artist pal Daniel (Daniel Pommereulle) borrowing a villa in southern Mediterranean France. Also staying in the house is  Haydee (Haydee Politoff), a carefree girl who has a more solid moral center than either of the two men, as shown by the cruel way that Adrien tempts, taunts, and uses her. Seeing it in the context of all the later films, plus the first two shorts, its meaning is clear and the story is rather hard to take, but only because it is so uncompromising.

    My Night at Maud’s, Claire’s Knee, and Love in the Afternoon are too well know to benefit from my regurgitations here. Suffice it to say that it was a pleasure to reacquaint myself with them.

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    The Bakery Girl of Monceau comes in full frame (1.33:1 OAR) with French DD 1.0 track and optional English subtitles. As with all the films in the set, this is windowboxed. Also on the disc is Rohmer’s 10 minute film  Presentation, or Charlotte and her Steak, starring  Jean-Luc Godard and Anna Karina, and “Moral Tales, Filmic Issues.”  Suzanne’s Career is a full frame presentation (1.33:1 OAR) with French DD 1.0 track and optional English subtitles, plus Rohmer’s short film  Nadja in Paris.  My Night at Maud’s is in full frame (1.33:1 OAR) with French DD 1.0 and optional English subtitles. Supplements include On Pascal, a film Rohmer made of a conversation between authors and philosophers Brice Parain and Dominique Dubarle (22 minutes), and an episode of  Telecinema, which interviews critic Jean Douchet, star Trintignant, and producer Pierre Cottrel (14 minutes), plus the theatrical trailer. The full frame (1.33:1 OAR) transfer of  La Collectionneuse is gorgeous, and it has French DD 1.0 track and optional English subtitles, plus the short documentary Rohmer directed called  A Modern Coed  (13 minutes), which anticipates his later Tales of the Four Seasons, an episode of  Parlons Cinema, a 1977 interview with Rohmer, and the theatrical trailer. Claire’s Knee comes in full frame (1.33:1 OAR) with French DD 1.0 track and optional English subtitles, plus Rohmer’s 1999 short film  The Curve, and an excerpt from the French television program  Le journal du cinema, with interviews with stars Jean-Claude Brialy, Beatrice Romand, and Laurence de Monahagan. Finally,  Love in the Afternoon is once again in a full frame transfer (1.33:1 OAR) with French DD 1.0 audio with optional English subtitles, plus Rohmer’s 1958 short  Veronique and her Dunce, and the theatrical trailer.  Finally, there is an “Afterword by Neil LaBute” (12 minutes), and it becomes clear that Mamet is less of an influence on LaBute in his own cruel portraits of soulless moderns than Rohmer is (though Polanski might be another one).

    All the discs come in digipaks and are accompanied by the a book of the short stories on which the films are based, and a 60 page booklet with cast and crew, chapter titles,  transfer info, still, and essays by and about Rohmer, including Molly Haskell and  Film Comment elites such as Kent Jones and Philip Lopate.

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    Eric Rohmer’s Six Moral Tales hit the street on August 15th, and retails for $99.95. The whole box is No. 342, with the individual films bearing numbers 343 through 348. It is to be hoped that the release of these older films will create an appetite for more recent Rohmer, the last five or six of his films having found no purchase on the American market.

     

  • Brat-halla #143: Norse Force – Advancing Fast

    by Jeffery Stevenson and Seth Damoose with colors by Anthony Lee

    Larger Comic Version | ARCHIVES | OLDER ARCHIVES

    Brat-halla #143: Norse Force - Advancing Fast

    For extras, visit the Brat-halla Web site!

    Check out the preview to the Image comic Jeff writes…

    E-MAIL WRITER | ABOUT JEFF | ABOUT SETH | BRAT-HALLA BLOG | BRAT-HALLA FORUM | ARCHIVES

  • Spook’d #92: Extreme Lair Makeover – Making Plans

    by Jeffery Stevenson and Seth Damoose with colors by Anthony Lee

    Larger sized comic | ARCHIVES | OLDER ARCHIVES

    Spook'd #92: Making Plans

    To see Spook’d host Alastor’s blogging silliness and more fun Spook’d stuff,visit the Spook’d Web site!

    Check out the preview to…

    E-MAIL WRITER | ABOUT JEFF | ABOUT SETH | SPOOK’D BLOG | SPOOK’D FORUM | ARCHIVES | OLDER ARCHIVES

    Disclaimer: All material in Spook’d is fictitious and intended solely for the purpose of entertainment. Names are fabricated and any similarity to real people or places is purely coincidental except in those cases where public figures are being satirized.

  • Addicted To Bad: On the Failure of “You Got Served” to Penetrate Popular Consciousness, or Who Got Served?

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    It’s a well-known and completely scientific fact that I’m not making up that we are suffering from a major catchphrase glut. People who study these things (“nerds”) estimate that new ones are being added faster than society can process. (Phrases, not nerds.) The problem has become so widespread that children today are almost completely incapable of having a conversation that doesn’t refer to words uttered by a wacky neighbor.

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    TIMMY: (witnessing a diabetic friend going into insulin shock) Fo shizzle, my nizzle.

    BILLY: (rushing to the aid of their friend) Bada bing, bada boom!

    TIMMY: (administering first aid) I am indeed fed up with the legless reptiles on this most unpleasant airborne contraption!

    BILLY: (dialing 911) That’s hot.

    911 Operator: 911. What’s your emergency?

    TIMMY: (scared) We are two wild and crazy guys!

    911 Operator: Sir, that’s not an emergency.

    TIMMY: I got a fever. And the only prescription… is more cowbell!

    911 Operator: Understood. I am dispatching a licensed percussionist to your location.

    TIMMY: (angry) My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard!

    It wasn’t always this way. As little as 100 years ago, before senses of humor were widely available, children communicated in a direct, unironic manner, the way the Lord intended. However, with the introduction and subsequent popularity of radio, the first inklings of true catchphrases began. On the streets, youth could be heard repeating the Lone Ranger’s famous “Hi yo, Silver!” and Davy Crockett’s slightly less well-known “I smell a badger in your drawers!” Unfortunately, the two subsequent World Wars forced the nation into slogan rationing mode to save much-needed sayings for boys in the trenches. More effective ones like “Loose lips sink ships” were immediately shipped out, while lesser phrases like “Whatchoo talkin’ ’bout, Hitler?” were stored for later use.

    Unfortunately, once the second war ended, these expressions languished, unused, in warehouses across the country until an enterprising producer at Paramount inquired about them. As an experiment, budding comedienne Lucille Ball was given dozens to use in her show, “I Enjoy Lucy’s Comedic Antics” (soon renamed to the less cumbersome “Goddammit, Lucy!”, which was later followed by “Lucy, You Filthy Whore!”). The show (and its memorable catchphrase “Who’s your bitch?”) was a hit, and ever since then, the government has unloaded billions of the things on the unsuspecting public, most infamously when the CIA reportedly spread inexpensive, dangerously pure catchphrases in America’s inner cities in the late 1980s, starting with the ironic use of “bad.”

    imago1.jpgWhich brings us to YOU GOT SERVED. With such a preponderance of slogans, why did the producers feel the need to foist an awkward legal term on us all. Why “you got served”? Why not something that actually makes sense, like, I don’t know, “res ipsa loquitur” (“it speaks for itself”)?

    GENERIC EVIL WHITE DANCER GUY: You call that dancing?

    ELGIN: Res ipsa loquitur, fool!

    CROWD: Ooooh! No, he di’n’t!

    Alas, it was not to be. Instead, we got served with an awkward combination of BREAKIN’ (minus the Adidas) and BRING IT ON (minus the cheer). The film concerns itself with best pals David and Elgin, who participate in dance battles that are refereed by a grown man who allows himself to be addressed as “Mr. Rad.” And see, right there, the movie loses all credibility. How can you take a movie seriously when the screenwriters don’t even have the energy to come up with a convincing contemporary nickname? Are we supposed to believe that this man hasn’t changed his nickname since 1985? It’s a good thing that the movie didn’t try to add any other adults or they could have ended up with names like Ol’ Doc Spaz, Ms. Fur-Shur, and Dr. Stan Cougar-Mellencamp.

    Anyway, David and Elgin are the best dancers in town, and regularly “serve” the other dance groups. What they serve them is never made clear, but I’m guessing a heaping helping of shame. They supplement the income from these dance-offs (because apparently, even in the 21st century, “dance-off participant” still isn’t a valid career choice) by delivering gym bags for the local Notorious B.I.G. impersonator. Unfortunately, David is busy hitting on Elgin’s little sister when he should be helping her brother deliver a particularly big gym bag, and El ends up in the hospital. This sets off a series of events (mostly dance-related) that culminate in the most intense chess match ever put to film.

    lineup.jpgOkay, fine: It all ends at the big dance competition, where the big prize is, coincidentally, just enough money to pay off Biggie, and the chance to be cut out of a Lil’ Kim video. Now, I don’t want to give anything away, but let’s just say that it involves a lot of serving and Lil’ Kim being more or less topless.

    Sadly, being gotten served never really caught on, although I hear Kim is still mostly topless. Which is probably for the best. Kids have enough to deal with these days, what with having to get real, non-dancing jobs and all, without having their friends mock-threatening them with legal action at every turn.

  • Take Me Home Blog #7 – DON’T WORRY (Everyone ELSE is alone, too)

     

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    I was laying in bed this morning, looking at my fiance, thinking of a lyric from Modest Mouse. “No one really knows the ones they love. If you knew everything they thought, I bet you’d wish that they’d just shut up.” I thought about it on the way to work, driving (or idling, rather) along the 101.

    I don’t think you can help but think about loneliness in Los Angeles. More people than you can imagine, all winding their way through the veins of the city. I’m working on a film out in Agoura Hills, about 45 miles from downtown LA. There’s a spot on the highway where the city surrenders to the Malibu Mountains. And every time I reach it, I imagine Los Angeles 100 years ago. Is this what the rest of it looked like? Amber fields and whatnot? What was it like to be alive then? Surely we were happier. Despite more physical labor(which, after sitting at this computer for thirty minutes, I can’t imagine being a bad thing), more disease and hardships. But were they at least more connected? To each other, to the world surrounding them?

    Naturally, I assume so. I picture neighbors knowing one another. The tipping of hats. Before the flood of people made villages into towns, towns into cities. You see, when I’m down, not only do I possess the gift of nostalgia for times I miss from my life, but times I never even lived. That I have no right to miss. I don’t think about how great other people have it elsewhere, I think about how great people had it back in 1874. You know, we were still licking our wounds from the war, not quite ready to launch into the Industrial Revolution. Not necessarily trying to get ahead. Just trying to get by.

    Sounds pretty swell, huh? Sitting out on the porch, hearing the train whistle from the next town over. Maybe drinking Country Time lemonade (afterall, what are our memories without the imprint of mass marketing?). It all seems, well… perfect.

    At the same time, I’ve been reading Sherwood Anderson’s classic “Winesburg, Ohio”. It’s a fictional town similar to the one he grew up in at the turn of the century. Each chapter follows a different member of the town of Winesburg, and each person is more hopeless than the one before. There’s the town pastor, being driven mad by his private obsession with the woman he spies on from the chapel window. An old crop picker who wants so badly to tell his young friend to flee his ensuing married life. The daughter of a farmer who is driven mad from the desire to live up to her father’s expectations.

    And yet, despite all of the despair, it’s an amazingly gratifying book. One of the best I’ve ever read. And the reason is quite clear to me: with each page, I’m reminded of our connection. Loneliness and disappointment. These are universal; they somehow weave their way through all stretches of time and place.

    As of now, do you feel isolated? Do you think the internet has changed that? For the better… or for the worse?

    In the latest Rolling Stone, there’s an interview with author Kurt Vonnegut where he laments the decline of civilization. Could he be right? Or is he just getting old?

    We reached 300 million people here in the U.S. this summer. We’re supposed to hit 400 million by 2040. More people, less land… more isolation? If a man has thirteen kids, can he love them as fully as he would three?

    These are the questions left playing Pong in my brain as the day draws to a close. In a moment, I will slide into bed next to my future wife. Comforted, if even momentarily, by the idea that if we all must fall asleep alone, at least I get to do so in her company.

    -Sam Jaeger

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  • Weekend Shopping Guide 8/25/06: Lemon Demon

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    The weekend’s here. You’ve just been paid, and it’s burning a hole in your pocket. What’s a pop culture geek to do? In hopes of steering you in the right direction to blow some of that hard-earned cash, it’s time for the Quick Stop Weekend Shopping Guide – your spotlight on the things you didn’t even know you wanted…

    Sometimes, you run across someone that is so incredibly talented that you envy and admire their skills, to the point of wondering why they were so greedy at the talent pool, taking what surely must have been other’s shares of genius (like mine – I’m sure this bastard took what should have been my piano playing ability… ). But the ultimate insult is when they’re so damn good that you actually really and truly dig what they do… It’s hard to hate someone whose work has been on repeat since it arrived in the mail. Such is the case with Neil Cicierega (http://www.eviltrailmix.com) and his one-man band, Lemon Demon. Like a cross between They Might Be Giants, Harry Nilsson, Matthew Sweet, Jonathan Coulton, and every other bright, infectious songwriter you can name, Cicierega’s Lemon Demon is like a pop confection filled with witty nougat and intelligent caramel… And is nowhere near as awkward as my candy metaphor. Do yourself a huge favor and pick up all three Lemon Demon albums – Damn Skippy, Hip To The Javabean, & Dinosaurchestra ($10-$11 each) – via http://www.CDFreedom.com. Then you can begin hating his genius and talent, like me.

    After wrapping up her inaugural season’s big mystery and clearing her father’s reputation, Veronica Mars starts her second season (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$59.98 SRP) with a brand new case to solve, starting with a missed ride on the school bus (a bus which plummets off the side of a cliff minutes later). With the circumstances in doubt, you can bet Veronica’s hitting the bricks, and it proves to be a great sophomore effort that keeps the momentum from a wonderful first season. The 6-disc set features a pair of featurettes, deleted scenes, and a gag reel (sadly, still no commentaries – here’s hoping another one will pop up on the net).

    Presenting dozens of rarely to never-before-seen pieces of conceptual artwork, The Art of Disneyland (Disney Press, $49.95 SRP) is a stunning volume celebrating the 50th anniversary of Walt’s wonderland. Of all the amazing pieces presented – showing the development of the various lands and attractions – my favorite remains the work of animator Marc Davis, whose design sensibilities made rides like “Pirates of the Caribbean” and “The Haunted Mansion” the beloved character pieces they are to this day.

    Who doesn’t love a Tommy pastiche that substitutes Nintendo for pinball and has Fred Savage as the svengali-like brother (a la Tom Cruise in Rain Man) of the titular character’s video game prodigy? Yes, I went to go see The Wizard (Universal, Rated PG, DVD-$14.98 SRP) on the big screen in 1989, mainly to get a first glimpse at the then-hotly anticipated Super Mario Brothers 3 (remember those good ol’ days?). Did I think it was cheese, even as a kid? Sure. Did I still go giddy seeing a leaf-powered Mario take flight? You’re damn right I did.

    Long before he conquered America as Dr. House, Hugh Laurie had earned his place amongst Britain’s comedic firmament alongside the brilliant Stephen Fry as the dynamic duo Fry & Laurie. After long years of waiting and hoping, the first two seasons of their sketch series A Bit of Fry & Laurie (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$24.98 SRP each) has made its way to DVD. While the bonus materials on the first season is technically limited to the rarely-seen pilot, the second season features the documentary Footlights: 100 Years of Comedy, featuring early Fry & Laurie material. If you’ve never seen the show, rectify that glaring oversight immediately.

    There have been a surprising spate of Elizabeth I dramas to come down the pike the last few years (as well as a couple of documentaries), but none of them sucked me into to the drama of her reign quite like HBO’s Elizabeth I miniseries (HBO, Not Rated, DVD-$29.98 SRP), starring Helen Mirren as the titular monarch and concentrating on not only her tempestuous time on the throne, but also her early love affair with the earl of Leicester (Jeremy Irons) but also his stepson the Earl of Essex (Hugh Dancy). Bonus materials include a making-of featurette and a look at the real Elizabeth.

    It’s not the best of Britcoms (which is a pretty high standard, actually), but the complete first season of The Worst Week Of My Life (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$24.98 SRP) is still a goofily fun romp, chronicling the week before the wedding of Howard (Ben Miller) and Mel (Sarah Alexander). If things can wrong, they do. If misunderstanding can happen, they do. If family relations can prove odd and disruptive… well, you get the picture. Bonus materials include interviews with the cast & writers, and outtakes.

    Hot on the heels of the disastrous Howard the Duck, the critical knives were sharpened for the George Lucas-produced Radioland Murders (Universal, Rated PG, DVD-$14.98 SRP) – which is a shame, because its all-star whodunit during the 1930’s-era of live radio is actually a fun, if slight, romp. It also stars the criminally underappreciated (and under-used) Brian Benben, who deserves boatloads of Emmy’s for his work as Martin Tupper in Dream On. Go on and give this flick another chance.

    Martin Freeman follows up his turn on The Office with The Robinsons (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$24.98 SRP) where he play Ed – the recently-divorced black sheep of a family that plays like a middle class version of Arrested Development‘s Bluths. Add to that profound dissatisfaction with his job and a mid-life crisis at 32, the first season is a wonderfully dry slice of aging Gen-X comedy. Bonus features include a behind-the-scenes featurette, outtakes, and commentary on all 6 episodes.

    Celebrating his 80th birthday, Sony Legacy has released a clutch of pretty damn good Tony Bennett discs, spanning his entire career. The discs included – fully remastered, mind you – are I Left My Heart In San Francisco, Perfectly Frank, MTV Unplugged, Tony Bennett’s Greatest Hits of the 50’s, and Tony Bennett’s Greatest Hits of the 60’s (Sony Legacy, $11.98 SRP each).

    Dismissed at the time as a lackluster return to TV, opinion has been turning the other way in regards to The Comeback (HBO, Not Rated, DVD-$39.98 SRP), Lisa Kudrow’s single season spoof on a down-and-out actress’s return to the spotlight via a reality TV show. As the formerly A-list, now C-list, Valerie Cherish, Kudrow is a bag of neediness, ego, and eccentricities, and the 13 episode run is just as awkwardly funny and bitingly satirical as that other HBO show starring Larry David. The 2-disc set features an exclusive interview with Valerie, backstage at her appearance on Dancing With the Stars, and even audio commentaries.

    From the first helicopter glory hot shot of the mammoth ocean liner representing the new, bigger Poseidon (Warner Bros., Rated PG-13, DVD-$34.98 SRP), my spider-sense began to tingle. Surely, Wolfgang Peterson couldn’t find a way to make the already soap opera-ish disaster classic The Poseidon Adventure tackier, could he? Well, of course he can! Just about every cliché and archetype is dusted off and made even more extreme (can you imagine characters more cliché than the original?), and the increase in scale of the vessel itself does little to ratchet up the palpable tension the much smaller ship in the original accomplished so well… In fact, the gargantuan modern S.S. Poseidon actually makes things slightly more comical, if anything. Anyway, you know the only reason to watch it is for the boat flipping. The 2-disc set features a making-of documentary, behind-the-scenes featurettes (including an intern’s video diary), the theatrical trailer, and a History Channel documentary on rogue waves.

    With Spike Lee’s devastating documentary about the national tragedy of New Orleans in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina, now may be a good time to give a spin to The Dirty Dozen Brass Band’s elegiac and powerful remake of Marvin Gay’s What’s Going On (Shout! Factory, $18.98 SRP). I really can’t say much more than to go listen, and don’t forget.

    Those who know Fred MacMurray solely from My Three Sons and The Absent-Minded Professor must drop everything and experience his turn in Billy Wilder’s Academy Award-winning Double Indemnity (Universal, Not Rated, DVD-$26.98 SRP), playing the murderous lover of Barbara Stanwyck and co-conspirator in a plot to off her wealthy husband after he signs a lucrative double indemnity insurance policy. Will they get away with the crime, or will a suspicious claims manager (Edward G. Robinson) catch the nefarious couple? It’s noir at its best, and now-available as a 2-disc special edition featuring a brand-new documentary, commentary with Richard Schickel, commentary with film historian/screenwriter Lem Dobbs and film historian Nick Redman, and the 1973 made-for-TV remake starring Richard Crenna.

    I’ve stated in the past what a fan I am of the Critical Review documentaries, which take an in-depth look at various bands with critical analysis, plus rare interviews and footage. The latest is the second volume on Queen, covering the period from 1980-1991 (Chrome Dreams, Not Rated, DVD-$19.95 SRP).

    One of those certifiable sci-fi classics (so classic it even co-stars The Professor himself, Russell Johnson), This Island Earth (Universal, Not Rated, DVD-$14.98 SRP) gets a newly-remastered release – but criminally, zero bonus features. What’s up with that? I want to know how those Metaluna Mutants were made! And what’s the deal with releasing this widescreen flick full frame? At the very least, can you finally re-release a special edition of Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie, which took aim at the flick?

    Even though Just My Luck (Fox, Rated PG-13, DVD-$29.99 SRP) is a harmless, generally amusing fluff of a film, every time I saw star Lindsey Lohan onscreen, I couldn’t help but thinking of the hard-partying chronic fatigue sufferer we’ve all come to know and love. All in all, it makes her perpetually lucky character’s role reversal with a perpetually unlucky young man an unintentional cautionary tale, as seeing Lohan dirty in the gutter doesn’t seem so far a stretch anymore. Bonus features include deleted scenes and a pair of behind-the-scenes featurettes.

    The release of historical Montreux Jazz Festival concerts continues with James Brown: Live At Montreux 1981 (Eagle Vision, Not Rated, DVD-$14.98 SRP), featuring not only the 14-song concert, but also a 10-track bonus CD of the performance.

    After discovering a downed alien aircraft in the Atlantic, the government hastily assembles a team of experts in order to prepare for the possibility of alien invasion – a team christened Threshold (Paramount, Not Rated, DVD-$54.99 SRP). It’s a relatively straightforward concept and featured a great cast – including Charles S. Dutton, Carla Gugino, and Brent Spiner – but the series never seemed to gel into anything close to its potential. Not surprisingly, the only threshold it crossed was cancellation. The 4-disc set features behind-the-scenes featurettes, deleted scenes, and an audio commentary on the pilot.

    As much as I enjoyed the adaptations featured in the BBC’s original collection, I think my favorites are amongst those in the Charles Dickens Collection 2 (BBC, Not Rated, DVD-$39.98 SRP). Loaded to the hilt with spectacular casts and spry staging, this 4-disc set features The Pickwick Papers, Dombey And Son, The Old Curiosity Shop, and Daniel Radcliffe’s first big break as David Copperfield (alongside Bob Hoskins, Dawn French, Ian McKellan, Maggie Smith, and Imelda Staunton). The set also contains a behind-the-scenes doc on Copperfield and Simon Callow reading from Pickwick.

    Most surprise hit shows stumble in their sophomore seasons (see Desperate Housewives), but House (Universal, Not Rated, DVD-$59.98 SRP) avoided that most destructive of pitfalls by remaining true to its core asset – Hugh Laurie’s Dr. Gregory House, a man whose bedside manner is virtually nonexistent, whose ego is massive, and whose sometimes unorthodox diagnoses and treatments are usually correct. The 6-disc set features all 24 episodes, plus alternate takes (you simply have to see), commentaries, “An Evening with House & It Could Be Lupus.. featurettes, and a blooper reel.

    Another victim of the great network sci-fi slaughter of 2006, Invasion (Warner Bros., Not Rated, DVD-$59.98 SRP) focuses on the town of Homestead, Florida in the aftermath of Hurricane Eve – which left not destroyed homes, but also a profoundly altered clutch of townspeople. Is it a natural occurrence? Is it a conspiracy? Is it aliens? The only thing for sure is it was cancelled, so this 6-disc set contains all 22 episodes, plus deleted scenes, a featurette on creator Shaun Cassidy, and a gag reel.

    And finally, this week’s toy recommendation. If those atrocious images from the upcoming Transformers movie abomination have your mind reeling and your heart aching, pick up one of Hasbro’s new Transformers: Titanium Series die cast figures ($15.99 SRP each). Fully transformable and featuring a display stand, each die cast metal figure is closer to the classic characters we know and love than anything that’s come out of Michael Bay’s overblown big screen disaster in the making. Go get the figs and feel better.

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    So there you have it… my humble suggestions for what to watch, listen to, play with, or waste money on this coming weekend. See ya next week…

  • Scrubs Blog: Pics a Plenty

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    Things are awfully busy now that production has resumed, so everyone’s running around a bit right now – so this week we’ve got a slew of pics to tide you over.  

    Let me remind you, though, that in support of the National Multiple Sclerosis Society, a Scrubs Scooter is being raffled off on October 7th. Tickets for the auction can be purchased online right now for $5.00, with all the money going to the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. You can head over to the MS site and enter by CLICKING HERE

    And now, the pics… First off, a hospital with no actors…

     

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    And finally, how the staff conducts itself around the “Congrats On Your Engagement Johnny C.” chocolate fountain… 

     

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  • Monkey Talk with Paul Dini: Ice Cream Time with Dad & Rashy

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    -By Paul Dini & Rashy

    Paul Dini’s Monkey Talk (co-hosted by his irrepressible sock monkey son, Rashy) returns with a a little slice of life examining a summer day, ice cream, and kids that grow up way too fast. Be sure to check out Rashy’s official site at LittleRashy.com

    DOWNLOAD:

    • Large (560 x 420 – QuickTime – 15.7 MB)
    • Small (320 x 240 – QuickTime – 6.92 MB)
    • YouTube
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  • The Fred Hembeck Show: Episode 69 – Gone Batty

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    Let me make myself clear here – I’m not a criminal.

    And I’m not particularly superstitious.

    But when a bat begins flying around our indoor living quarters, totally uninvited, well friends, THAT’S when I find myself immediately aligning myself with that proverbial cowardly lot Bruce Wayne once pondered about so long ago!

    Bats! Ugh.

    It was the night before last, y’see. Lynn and I were in the bedroom, watching TV. In preparation for inviting a trio of gal pals over for an unusually modest birthday celebration this Friday – an annual event – daughter Julie was next door, cleaning out her room (also an annual event…). Suddenly, she came running into our room and blurted out that a bat had swooped past her when she’d gone out to the kitchen to dump some debris in the trash can.

    A bat. It had been a full ten years – and an entirely different house – since we’d last had to contend with one of those unnerving critters. I really thought we were safe here – unlike our former domicile, there was no second floor, no attic window that wouldn’t quite close entirely. And even the doors here measured up less expansively, seeming to guarantee far less of a chance that an unwanted winged intruder could sneak in late at night when cat brothers Mario and Luigi rotated themselves in and out. But after a full decade of peace, Julie brought us the alarming news that – oh geez – there was a bat in the house.

    I don’t like bats. I’ve NEVER liked bats. But I had no choice – I had to leave the comforting glow of the tube to try and flush the creepy li’l pest out of our house. So, I grabbed a plastic laundry basket that was lying nearby, took the broom from Julie’s room, had the ladies close the doors to all the rooms in that well lit, currently bat-free portion of the house, took a deep breath, and then set out on a hunting expedition that I truthfully wanted absolutely no part of.

    And when we got to the kitchen dining room area, there it was, wildly flying around in that crazily erratic manner bats are infamous for. Despite the fact that Julie will turn sixteen years old tomorrow, she shrieked like a little girl, one a third her age – and despite the fact that I’m way, way older than that, I shrieked even LOUDER! The only one who kept her wits about her was wife Lynn, our savior during previous bat encounters. But that was years ago – Lynn’s knee isn’t what it used to be, and besides, the layout here is significantly different from our old house. If there was any hope of getting rid of the airborne rodent, it was pretty much entirely up to me!

    Yup – we were in REAL trouble…

    After the initial shrieking subsided, we lost sight of our uninvited guest. Where exactly he landed, we just plain didn’t know. I went downstairs, plastic laundry basket in one hand, broom in the other like some demented warrior, swatting at every nook and cranny, trying to determine if the vermin had fled to the lower level. Once I was satisfied he hadn’t gone in hiding down there, I closed up the entire area so he wouldn’t get the chance during his next fly-around.

    Meanwhile, upstairs, Lynn and Julie opened the back door, hoping against hope that, given the chance, he would just happily fly back out into the wild. Initially, they had opened both the front and side doors as well, but being the paranoid type, I objected. What’s to keep OTHER bats from coming in while we searched for the one we were already inadvertently providing housing for, I protested? We soon reached a compromise – only the back door would remain open, and only if one of the ladies would keep a keen eye on it the entire time. Three entrances demanded just a bit more vigilance than we were capable of providing at the time.

    Eventually, I made my way into the big room, the one that was built onto this house (before we moved in) as an addition. This is the room that has the stereo, the half-dozen chockful CD racks, the big TV, the two couches, the exercise bike, the wood stove, my drawing board, my art equipment, and – wouldn’t you know it – piles and piles of books! Oh, and did I mention the fifteen foot ceiling and curtained windows running across two walls? Well, when I banged my broom against one of those curtains, I hit pay dirt, at least figuratively – our prey darted out, and quickly reprised his flight of the damned.

    Julie and I then reprised our blood-curdling chorus of shrieks, even as I tentatively swung my broom ineffectively at the loathsome creature whenever he swooped nearby, always careful to keep the basket up over my head! It was quite the picture postcard.

    And after a few more minutes of this madness, we lost sight of him yet again. We knew he most likely was somewhere in the big room, but we just didn’t know where. So, we decided to turn the lights off, go back into the bedroom, watch a little more TV, and hope that when we came out, he’d once again be performing his unholy aerial maneuvers, and we’d figure SOME way to be rid of him.

    After about fifteen minutes, I decided it was time to go back for another turn at the bat, and so I once again slunk into the breach, broom and basket at the ready. We flipped the lights on. Nothing. Another careful but cursory time around the perimeter revealed nothing, and Lynn, tiring of watching my ineffective Frank Buck imitation, declared that the time was overdue for taking a shower, so off she went, leaving me and Julie to our own devices.

    That’s right – suddenly, we were operating without parental supervision!

    And wouldn’t you know it, that’s when I found him! I pulled back the curtain from another of the large wall windows, and there he was, hanging stationary on the window’s inner screen! We had him! Because unlike a house fly, you can sneak up on a bat, and he’s not gonna move! I immediately surrounded him with the laundry basket, and called for Julie to get me a large piece of foam board. The creepy thing made no move, but I knew once I attempted to slide the board behind the basket, I’d knock him from his perch, and as much as I dreaded the thought of it, there’d be some unavoidable activity on the bat’s part to follow. So, I took another deep breath, and began the task at hand. Sure enough, as soon as I knocked him free, he began to squeal, and desperately fly about inside the laundry basket.

    UNTIL, THAT IS, HE PULLED HIMSELF THROUGH ONE OF THE MANY ONE INCH SQUARE OPENINGS RINGING THE BASKET AND FLEW AWAY!!!

    Gee, I didn’t know bats could do THAT?…

    It helped explain how he most likely got in – earlier that very day, I had noticed that a small tear in the screen on the front door had somehow gotten a bit larger than I remember it, musing, “Gosh, I sure hope a bee doesn’t get in?” After seeing this Houdini act close up – TOO close up, trust me – I realized that bees were the least of my worries! (Thank goodness for Homeland Security recommendations – I’m not sure how well duct tape will serve us in keeping terrorists out, but it certainly turned out to be a palatable solution to our clear and present bat threat!….)

    So, once again, our bat adversary flew about, and rudely avoided the beckoning open door to freedom, and once again – yup – we lost track of him.

    It was turning into an awfully long, long night.

    We needed a break. So, after informing a freshly scrubbed Lynn of the comedy of errors she’d just missed, I made myself a cup of caffeine laced iced tea, grabbed a video tape of that evening’s edition of Countdown With Keith Olbermann, and settled into Julie’s room to watch it while she continued to clean up things. Maybe a good forty-five minutes of darkness would give the bat a chance to rest up, and subsequently give us yet another shot at shooing him from where he clearly wasn’t wanted…

    It was almost midnight when I went back out. Once again, there was no outward sign of the bat, and once again, I went around, tapping my broom in every place he conceivably could be hiding – and given the depressing amount of clutter I’ve blithely accumulated over the years, that could’ve been any of a hundred places! I could just see the Animal Control folks giving the place a once over: “He’s not behind the Elvis figure, and I don’t think he’s nestled down between this pile of Warren magazines – maybe over by the Elton John box set?…” No, that wasn’t gonna work – clearly, I had to find him, and for everyone’s sanity, it’d better be soon!

    And then I looked up and realized I’d been giving the varmint too much credit – he wasn’t hiding at all, he was hanging there in plain sight! But in the dim light, his dark inert figure blended in easily with the wall of bricks surrounding the wood stove. The only problem? He found himself a nice cozy spot about a foot from the ceiling – the fifteen foot high ceiling!

    What else could I do? I called for back-up, Julie got me the step-ladder, and Lynn provided me with a smaller, escape proof plastic salad spinner bowl and a matching piece of cardboard to slip behind it. This time I figured I’d better get it right – I didn’t know if my heart would survive a third try! So, with makeshift weapons in hand, I slowly climbed the ladder, Lynn holding it steady all the while as Julie watched in breathless anticipation (fully ready to shriek should circumstances call for it).

    I was up on the top step when I carefully reached out to trap our intruder, praying that my hand remained steady and that the bowl wouldn’t somehow inadvertently shift.

    Success! But that was the easy part – now I had to slip the cardboard behind the container, put my hand securely over it, and then carefully descend the ladder.

    Happily, I was able to do perform all three of those monumental tasks properly, but, sensing the rapid beating of my overexerted ticker, Lynn quickly and calmly took my prize from me and swiftly exited through the back door, Julie at her side, where she walked a decent distance out into our back yard, and let our unwanted batboarder flap his wings free and into the night – but hopefully, NEVER again back into our house!

    Bats – I hate ’em! Maybe that’s why I’ve always been more of a Superman guy than a Batman acolyte. After all, I’ much prefer that a tiny Kryptonian member of the Superman Emergency Squad from the bottle city of Kandor fly dizzily around my living room than a bat any day, y’know?

    (The rest of the evening was uneventful, save for when that cute little moth landed on my shoulder in the kitchen, and I jumped a foot! What – and you WOULDN’T?…)

    Hembeck.com – no need to have bats in YOUR belfry to visit my home site! Stop by, but please – no sudden moves, okay?…

    Copyright 2006 Fred Hembeck

  • Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review, Kisses and Caroms

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    There are all kinds of films, good, bad, and indifferent. Of course we all relish the good and the great. But the “bad” or indifferent films can have value, too.

    Kisses and Caroms isn’t a bad film. It is an indie style film made on a small budget, shot on video, utilizing a handful of sets and employing a small group of actors, who play friends and colleagues working in a billiards supply house, who make momentous personal decisions in the course of one day. It is earnest and well made within those limitations, and if the film had been made by Universal and released as a summer teen sex comedy, with the aid of 16 more writers and / or script doctors, it might be a modest hit.

    Kisses title

    As it stands now, it is a very good calling card movie, one which director and co-writer Vincent Rocca can use to show executives and say, See, I can make a movie that is funny and makes sense, is well edited and well shot, so give me a chance to become the next Steven Spielberg, even the next Shawn Levy.

    In the course of the day covered by the film, Zack (Drew Wicks) realizes that he has to make a choice about his recently ex-girlfriend and still-co-worker Jennifer (Nikki Stanzione), while his work friend David (Ryan Parks, who bears a slight resemblance to Edward Burns) realizes that he has to stop trying to imitate Warren Beatty and change his conduct. The day begins with Zack and Jennifer waking up in bed – with Tara (Nicole Rayburn), the female equivalent of David, a fun loving hedonist and a champion pool player who also works at the billiard shop. Jennifer suggested the threesome because that’s what she is, the perfect girlfriend who will even do things such as let Zack indulge in his sexual fantasy. David, meanwhile, has a habit of being invited back to the homes of clients such as Ginger Lynn Allen for extemporaneous sex. Eventually, Dr. Bob Johnson (Bart Shattuck), a Dr. Phil style radio counselor, catches David in flagrante and heads down to the billiard shop for a confrontation.

    David’s later reflection is thus well motivated, if perhaps temporary. Zack’s resistance to settling down with Jennifer is mysterious, even though he explains it well enough. But that speaks to a moral or behavioral conflict within the movie. Hugh Hefner is to Kisses what the Rat Pack was to Swingers, a living manual of modern conduct. David and Zack often wonder what “Hef” would do in a given situation.

    Kisses team

    But at the same time, if Kisses has a frat boy’s surface philosophy, it also has a chick flick’s center. Taking an essentially conservative position, the film affirms marriage, commitment. I am guessing that the film is going to lose the guys around the time David submits to soul searching, and pick up the women around the time that Jennifer and Zack have their first argument.

    Another thread of the film is score settling. I am guessing that writers Rocca and / or Michael Hutchinson had some kind of shit day job. A parallel film within the film, so to speak, is the succession of uncomprehending, demanding, scamming customers that the staff have to deal with while barely hiding their contempt. As someone who also has a shit day job, I can speak to the fact of this half of the film’s accuracy. On the other hand, David and Zack have a cavalier attitude toward their clients (as seen in their humor over and disdain for a customer leaving messages on the store’s machine when the shop hasn’t opened on time) makes them much less likable.

    But what do I mean when I note that even bad or indifferent films have value? I hinted at this with the reference to the usual 16 writers that most summer blockbusters have. Kisses and Caroms only has two credited writers, but the script would have benefited from a few more journeys through the word processor. Some of the dialogue, and thus the acting, is uneven, such as in the first scene between David and Zack, and sometimes the dialogue feels too chatty and not focused. On the other hand, a scene between Tara, Jennifer, and Zack, about religion and Mormonism is both well written and well acted.

    One character, Eddie, (Keith Alexander) is the butt of jokes because he is not naturally funny like the two privileged main characters. Unfortunately, they are not as funny as they think they are. But yet, the film is onto something with this set up; we all know people, either from school or big work places, who rely on TV to write their jokes for them, and traffic in empty catch phrases. It’s just that the writers did not think it though enough, or come up with better examples to really capture the pathetic hollowness of Eddie. Also, the crude cloacal humor, such as scenes with Eddie and Tara in the bathroom (not with each other), though they may be nods to films from Porky’s to Clerks, also aren’t funny. In honor of the film’s roots in recent film history, Rocca makes a nod to Kevin Smith with the character of a Silent Bobbette (Deanna Rocca) delivering some Mooby’s food substances to the shop. Still, director Rocca shows unheralded bedrock filmmaking skills, and I look forward to  his next film.

    Kisses Tara

    After a limited theatrical release, Kisses and Caroms hits the street as a DVD on Tuesday, August 22nd. For extras, on the disc I reviewed, anyway, the package offers Rocca’s earlier film, a short subject called Helium a funny mock news story about the witnesses to an auto company’s dirigible crashing into a warehouse all speaking in squeaky voices thanks to the escaped gas. The disc as it hit the street contains two commentary tracks, one featuring the cast, the other the director, plus three featurettes offering auditions, outtakes, a “making of,” and a photo gallery with 80-plus images.

  • Brat-halla #142: Norse Force – Volunteers

    by Jeffery Stevenson and Seth Damoose with colors by Anthony Lee

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    Brat-halla #142: Norse Force - Volunteers

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    Check out the preview to the Image comic Jeff writes…

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  • Nocturnal Admissions: DVD Review, Apocalypse Now: The Complete Dossier

     

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    I can’t believe that’s 2006 and we are still talking about  Apocalypse Now. Not that I’m complaining.  No, I’m delighted to be given the chance again thanks to Paramount’s release on August 15th of  Apocalypse Now: The Complete Dossier. 

    A few reviewers have already complained that the set, which combines  AN ’79 with  AN ’01, A.K.A.,  Apocalypse Redux, along with some deleted scenes,  isn‘t complete,  because it lacks the documentary  Hearts of Darkness. I can understand the hunger to have every cinematic component of the  AN story available in one place, but A)  Hearts of Darkness is not really affiliated with the film, it is an independently made doc owned by others and therefore not easily added to the mix; B) it is easily available to anyone who really wants it, and I am not going to give even a  bit of a hint how to get it; and C) if you are going to put something on a disc that makes for a “complete dossier,” why not include the 5-plus hour work print that everyone seems to have except me, including the operator of the video rental place down the street who only lends it to his friends?

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    So, yes, it would be nice to have  Hearts of Darkness consolidated with  AN, in some kind of package that maybe also includes the work print, but all that will have to wait for another publication of the disc, say, maybe four years from now, when the film is released again on HD DVD (the other companies are doing Blu-Ray). And I am delighted to finally be able to see, finally, after all these years, footage of Colby (Scott Glenn) killing the Photojournalist (Dennis Hopper).

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    Instead, for now we have a two-disc set with extras that include maybe 20 minutes of previous un-included footage from the work print, plus a commentary from Coppola himself. It is an excellent commentary, despite the fact that he refers to the actor as J.D. Spradlin instead of  G.D. Spradlin “¦ and who cares if he calls  Hearts of Darkness his wife’s film instead of Fax Bahr and George Hickenlooper’s (after all, she did shoot 75 per cent of the footage in  Hearts). No, the man talks about  AN with the enthusiasm and committment as if he were still working on it, and though some of the anecdotes may be a tad well worn to the point that neither he nor anyone else can probably remember if they are really true, it is still a joy to hear a major director discuss a major film with such intimacy and knowledgeability, despite the fact that you have to insert disc two to get parts two of each of the two versions (which must have something to do with the way the yak tracks work).

     

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    Other reviews have gone into such detail about the extras, such as Preston Jones in his excellent coverage at  DVDTalk that there is no need for me to duplicate or add to that material here. Rather, I’d like to discuss curious aspects of the film that struck me for the first time while watching it on three times in preparation for this review.

     

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    For example, while watching  AN I began to wonder, What does the film believe about the Vietnam war? Is the film for it, or against it? Is it anti-communist? Is it liberal, or conservative? Is the film anti-war, or just anti-bad wars that can’t be won, or can’t be won by western interlopers? What are we suppose to think about Kurtz and Willard? What are we suppose to think about the end? Just what is it that Kurtz is mad (both angry and insane) about?

    Willard is suppose to be our eyes and ears. Through him, we absorb the Vietnam experience. All that is strange about it is newly strange to him, and thus to us (although he  has been there for some time, so Vietnam’s psychedelic nature shouldn’t come as a total surprise). But Willard is also a competent if not superior soldier, enough to earn the respect of Kurtz, and he has killed men, close enough to feel their last breaths, as he tells us in the narration. He is not us. He is a good soldier but tortured by what he has seen and done, not unlike the way Kurtz has been twisted by his frustration. He is determined. The breaking point comes with the intermission heralding sampan sequence. The mission is all to Willard, and he kills the dying woman to get back on track, showing a ruthlessness that cows the PBR crew. He is not us, but we are a part of him.

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    Kurtz, on the other hand, is  for war. He wants to fight it, but properly, and to win. He is a soldier to his essence. Kurtz is the equivalnet of, or a rogue version of, someone like John Paul Vann, an essentially conservative figure of whom liberal journalists of the time were enamored, perhaps without fully understanding. As with Kurtz, it’s a little difficult to figure out just what it was that Vann was so mad about concerning the conduct of the war beyond its ineptness and bureaucratic slowness. He saw battles fought poorly, and seemed to be fixated on a policy of the generals concerning village conversion. But as far as a global perspective on the conflict, I can only find one quote, which is that “If it were not for the fact that Vietnam is but a pawn in the larger East-West confrontation, and that our presence here is essential to deny the resources of this area to Communist China, then it would be damned hard to justify our support of the existing government.” Kurtz, too, has something of that larger perspective, with an added dollop of Vietnam’s role as part of a cultural – anthropological cycle of death and rebirth, based on the writings of Frazer (which, as far as I have been able to research, no one has bothered to try and research in connection wtih  AN; well, it is a thick book). Kurtz’s modern equivalents probably would be men such as Scott Ritter, the UNSCOM guy, and Robert Baer, whose vision infuses  Syriana.

    Milius, however, apparently specifically based Kurtz on a Colonel named Robert Rheault, of the Fifth Special Forces Group. In 1969, Reault ordered the execution of a South Vietnamese guide whom he though was a double agent. His judgment appeared tio be correct, but he was brought up on charges (later dropped), and word spread that the military was conducting “foreign policy” on its own. It was from (if I remember correctly) a  Newsweek article about Rheault that Milius got the inspiration for Kurtz and the phrase “termination with extreme prejudice.” Rheault’s rogue activities appealed to Milius’s anarco-conservative leanings, which are out of Baudelaire’s portrait of the soldier in  The Painter of Modern Life more than Any Rand. Soldiers are the only truly noble people. This, you might say, is the Milius viewpoint. On their own, soldiers have a code and an honor and could probably triumph in any contest were it not for politicians and officers. In Milius’s version of the script, Willard joins Kurtz in a final apocalyptic battle with the North Vietnamese. And Kurtz’s submergence into primitivism is something seen in other Milius films. Like the Soviet era soldiers who liked to tell anecdotes drawn from Russian culture (see James Brolin’s joke in  Traffic), Milius likes to use cautionary examples from Hitler’s army, partly for shock effect, but partly because German was, until then, a society that honored military culture, until it was subverted by the madness of the leaders. The Milius vision of Kurtz remains fairly consistent throughout the whole history of  AN, even during the weeks and weeks of expensive improvs with Brando. In the deleted scene, Colby gives Willard his imprimatur to kill Kurtz, but when he does, Willard replaces him in the eyes of Kurtz’s followers, “as a god.”

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    What does the film believe? The movie seems less concerned with policy than with a personal journey. Yes, war is hell. No matter what or why or where, war is hell. Stay out of it, stay away from it, for war can only kill you or harm you so bad that it unudermines your faith in the meaning of the society you are fighting for. The Vietnam war could have been won, theoretically,  but the Kurtz view is that it was fought badly. The movie might also be saying that the war could have been won if the soldiers were more like Kilgore and not fucked up on drugs and ambiguiety. But more important, war provides an intractable invitation for a personal journey, down the river of one’s identity. Let’s not forget what was happening in the real world during the time in which the film is set (which is, according to internal evidence, about 1970). The US was engaged in peace talks in France, Kissinger was bombing Laos, Lon Nol kicked everyone out of Cambodia, and four students were killed at Kent State. None of this is mentioned, nor is it relevant to  AN. Coppola is famous for saying that AN is not a film about Vietnam it is Vietnam.

     

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    Is  AN an anti-war movie? Perhaps in a general sense, but it is not necessarily an anti-Vietnam war movie. I would argue that  AN is instead, a Francis Ford Coppola movie. As in  The Godfather, as indeed in most Coppola movies, from  Dementia 13 all the way up to  Jack and  The Rainmaker,   AN is about a man who thought he was one thing,and turned out to be someone different. Michael Corleone thought that he didn’t have a trace of his father’s wicked blood in him, until the night he saved his father’s life in the hospital, and realized that, while all around him were shaking, he was still and composed, made for this sort of thing. Willard thought he was a regular soldier, a Special Ops kind of guy, but he wasn’t, he was another Kurtz. “They were going to make me a major for this, and I wasn’t even in their fucking army anymore.”

     

  • Nocturnal Admissions: Quiz

     

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    Well, I am in the midst of my review of Apocalypse Now: The Complete Dossier, but realized that I received an extra DVD from the distributors.  So I am going to give away the still sealed DVD  to the first person who can answer all, or most of, the questions in what I call The World’s Hardest Apocalypse Now Quiz. It’s 20 of the toughest questions I could come up with, based on Coppola’s commentary track for the new disc, and my extensive research into the film. Here they are:

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    1) Whom did Coppola originally want to play Willard?

    2) What does PBR stand for?

    3) What now-obscure Green Beret colonel served as the initial inspiration for Kurtz?

    4) What member of the early American Zoetrope community claims that he came up with the idea of adapting Heart of Darkness to a film about Vietnam?

    5 ) While Martin Sheen was recovering for six weeks, what person served as a stand in?

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    6, 7, 8; 9, 10, 11; 12, 13, 14) Name the Playboy Bunnies, the actresses who played them, and their centerfold calendar month or title?

    15) What actress was almost a Bunny but dropped out to star in a TV show?

    16) What animal is sacrificed at the end of the film?

    17) What poem does Kurtz read obsessively?

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    18) What is title of Eleanor Coppola’s published diary about the making of the film?

    19) What unusual thing did Martin Sheen do during the Academy Award season?

    20) What is the title of the play inspired by ** AN, in which several filmmakers and a Bunny are trapped in a room by a monsoon?

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    Please send your answers to dkholm2003@yahoo.com, which I have reserved solely for this quiz. Please include your address. The first person to answer all of the questions correctly, or, barring that, to answer the most correctly, will be mailed a sealed disc of Apocalypse Now. Sadly, I won’t have time to inform the losers, only the winner, so if you don’t hear from me within a few days, well, you probably didn’t get enough answers correct. With luck, I will announce a winner when I post my AN review.

     

  • Spook’d #91: Extreme Lair Makeover – Diggin’ Time

    by Jeffery Stevenson and Seth Damoose with colors by Anthony Lee

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    Spook'd #91: Diggin' Time

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    Disclaimer: All material in Spook’d is fictitious and intended solely for the purpose of entertainment. Names are fabricated and any similarity to real people or places is purely coincidental except in those cases where public figures are being satirized.