VIRGINIA CITY – Not every woman working at the Bunny Ranch is an HBO star. You’ll recognize Bunny Love, Air Force Amy and Audrey in the line up, but there’s plenty of fresh faces ready to introduce themselves. These are women who don’t want to bask in the limelight or even have their pics posted on brothel’s website.
Why be anonymous at the high profile Bunny Ranch? One woman grew up in the area. She always makes sure the local guests don’t recognize her. She has no dream of being a spokesmodel for “Take an Uncle to Work Day.” She won’t arrive at the line up until she checks the security monitor. One night a pack of old high school classmates decided they were going to party in the parlor. She spent the night in her room with a good book. Quite a few women commute from around the country. They appreciate the chance to earn more cash than pulling extra shifts at Hooters. The folks back home think they’re earning quick bucks cocktail waitressing at Reno casinos.
Hollywood always likes to push the prostitute character as either dim or a streetwise cookie. A majority of the Bunnies we spent time with were well educated. Many of them had not even worked as strippers. They’re smart enough to know there’s little point in shaking your breasts in a guy’s face while hanging on a pole for a dollar.
People will always ponder what drives a smart woman into prostitution. After quite a few informal chats, I deduced one common thread: Student loans. Many of the women had graduated from very influential schools. They were stuck owing over $100,000 plus for a liberal arts degree that sounded great, but could barely land a gig at Barnes and Noble. One had a degree in social work that after a five year career, left her living under the poverty line. They needed an economic boost that waitressing doesn’t offer. A person can only handle so many extra jobs before they question the point of living if your waking hours are spent punching the clock and getting deeper in debt.
Currently Dennis Hof has Natalie Dylan offering up her virginity to pay for her grad school. Alana Love is 7 months pregnant and eager to take on clients to wipe the slate on her pharmaceutical school loan and afford to be a stay at home mom. Ivy League schools ought to offer Prostitution as a minor for the non-trust fund kids. There was a recent high school graduate who had chosen working at the Bunny Ranch as her career goal when she was 14 after seeing the first HBO America Undercover special. She’s saving up for school.
Our hostess for Saturday evening was Danielle Luciano. She had returned to the Ranch after taking a few years off. During her first tenure, she was a low profile Bunny. Nobody in her family knew that she did this for a living. When she decided to get back in the business, she came out to her close family members. She wanted to be able to put her photos up on the website and help with publicity events without worrying about a nosey aunt finking her out to dad. Turns out that it wasn’t a traumatic revelation. The family knew about HBO series and didn’t have any problems with her working at that brothel.
Danielle was very open when it came to talking about her profession. While there is a gym at the Bunny Ranch compound, her most important exercise routine is Kegels. A Bunny has to be tight and rocking all over. Since my wife had come along on the trip to act as producer and Bunny wrangler (although mostly she wrangled me), the subject of threesomes was inevitable. Many of the Bunnies are gay for pay. If your wife is ready for her first threesome, you don’t want a woman who isn’t fully enthusiastic about the fun. You can’t afford the afterglow to be ruined by your wife declaring, “That was more for you than me.” You want her blissed out and drooling from all the attention. You want this to be a do-over moment. While you might have your dreamy third partner picked out, let your wife do the choosing. Odds are she’ll find the Bunny who will know how to equally divide her attention. Using our journalistic skills, we were able to observe that Danielle’s tip really worked. She’s very knowledgeable when it comes to couples play.
During breakfast, we hung out with Max. She’s best known for playing naked chess on Cathouse. She believes that a majority of men want princesses when they ring the buzzer. They want to spend time with the woman that’d be unapproachable in a normal social setting. Max doesn’t think a woman should smoke a cigarette or drink out of a beer bottle while lounging near the bar. What’s the point of coming to the Bunny Ranch to hit on a woman they could find in any Nevada honky tonk? She told us about a guy who was a major fan of Cathouse and wanted to hook up with one of the leading ladies. Upon arrival, he saw her by the bar sucking down a longneck and puffing away on a Virginia Slim. The image turned him off. He didn’t even approach his intended Bunny. Instead he found a lady in the parlor that impressed him and spent $5,000 for a night long party. Further proof that smoking is bad.
While Max thinks that a Bunny can elevate her career by doing adult material, the Bunny has to be careful of the genre. Do the wrong film and she’s no longer considered a high dollar date. What hedgefund manager wants to spend $10,000 to hook up with a woman who stars in hobo gangbang videos? Guys don’t like to think about who’s been with her before them. Even less men want to know that they’re getting Boxcar Willie Jr’s sloppy fifty-thirds. I came to trust Max’s opinions since she only works by appointment.
We come to the final two video segments of The Party Favors interview with Dennis Hof. Ron Howard has dropped out of the bidding war for Hof/Corey. All we have left is Roger Corman and a VHS-only operation out of Brussels. Corman promises I can play myself if I’m flame resistant. Otherwise he’s calling Clint Howard.
Our talk picks up with the cliffhanger of how Dennis went to an extreme to legally smoke pot. The topic changes to how he feels when he sees pimps and madames being busted outside of Nevada. Learn about Dennis’s relationship with Heidi Fleiss. Dennis discusses the new episodes of Cathouse on HBO (best found at the HBO OnDemand channel). He plugs the boxset containing the first two seasons and the musical of the show. He explains the educational value of the series. We dip into the new trends in what clients want to enjoy during their visits. Plus legendary boxer Butterbean is coming to the Bunny Ranch, but not the same way as porn stars Sunny Lane and Anna Mills.
Seeing how Ron Jeremy is rumored to be Jewish, the Golden Nugget Casino won’t accept wagers on his chances to beat Butterball for the last pork chop.
The final segment features exterior shots as we show off the area around the Ranch and the changes to the Brothel. There’s a Pony Express stop on the property. As a warning: Moonlight Benny’s is a real body shop and not a brothel. None of the selections the receptionist offers are euphemisms. The full service does involve paint and a hammer. Dennis discusses how the gift shop helps lure the curious into being full service guests. You can even buy his special hot sauce at any hour.
After the interview with Dennis wrapped up, Brooke Taylor arrived. She’d been in New York City to appear on a variety of shows including Tyra. Brooke has had a strange career path. Her life at that Ranch had been fully documented by HBO. America got to see her first day on the job. We were there when she popped her professional cherry. Because of her performance on Cathouse: The Musical, Brooke has performed at the Filmore West and the House of Blues. She became the centerfold in Hustler at the same time Marie Claire did a profile piece on her. She’s a very busy woman who still has time to lay back and enjoy her day job.
The sad fate of Isabella Soprano weighed heavily on my questions. I wanted to know what kept Brooke Taylor stable. She invited us into her bedroom and we turned on the camera.
Brooke explains things that a woman needs to know before she considers a life at the Ranch. Remember to practice negotiations before you arrive in Carson City. I end up asking Brooke how strange it is that she went to college to study music, but received her big break while working in a brothel. This is a path that your college career counselor never discuss.
Thus we come to the end of the Party Favors visit to the Bunny Ranch. We’d like to thank Dennis Hof, Madame Suzette, Brooke Taylor, Max, the charming staff and the extremely rocking Danielle Luciano for their hospitality.
WIN SOME SWING
CBS DVD has been nice enough to let 5 of my faithful readers win copies of Swingtown: The First Season. The DVD will be released on Dec. 9. Normally I’d have you email in your name and address and five randomly chosen folks would win. But since Swingtown has been a favorite of this column, we’re having a quiz. In addition to sending in your name and address, you must answer these three questions about the show:
What star of Swingtown filmed a scene for a movie I produced?
According to the Party Favors, what series now features Grant Show’s pornstache?
What did Dennis Hof and I say about Swingtown during the Hof/Corey interview?
If you have these answers, drop me an email at mokaha@aol.com by Dec. 14. You must be 18 and allow 4-6 weeks to get your prize. My parents, co-workers, Anson Williams and Grant Show’s pornstache are not allowed to enter. Enclosing Polaroids that your parents sent to swingers magazines in 1976 won’t help you win, but they will be appreciated by our judges. Thanks once more to CBS for making a few of my readers be winners this holiday season.
In case you’re curious about the show, there’s a proper review in The DVD Shelf section.
DINING TIP
If you’re in Carson City, drop by Ti Amo in the Casino Fandango. The Seafood Lasagna still makes me drool. There’s plenty of shrimp, lobster, crab and scallops between the layers of noodles. It reheats nicely for when you need extra fuel for playing the Happy Days penny slots. Did I mention that Anson Williams cost me $2.38? Damn that Potsie.
VEGAS EATS
When you plan on visiting Las Vegas, skip the Strip and head to Fremont Street. There’s a friendly vibe downtown. My favorite place to snack on the street was Mermaid’s Casino. The slot palace offers up 99 cent Nathan’s hotdogs, deep fried Twinkies and deep fried Oreos. What makes the little grill in the back extra special is the staff is just bouncing around to the music on the PA system. The folks seemed like they were being pumped full of oxygen. They gave off enough energy to revive me from my Potsie downfall. I couldn’t help but smile and bounce around while waiting for my chocolate covered frozen banana. The Mermaid’s Casino is truly old school since they have change cups unlike that cheapskate Steve Wynn’s new casino: Redundant.
LEARN FROM MY PAIN
A little tip for business and tech people: When a person on the internet advertises that they’re proficient in CBT, this normally doesn’t mean Computer Based Training. Do not invite them to your office for a presentation.
JOE THE ZILCHER
John McCain screwed up and it cost me my ambassadorship to Hawaii. The position is still on the books at the State Department. You think the feds ever eliminate a gig? There’s still a Department of Buggywhip Inspection. My destiny of being Ambassador to the land of Don Ho was screwed by Joe the Plumber. When John McCain needed a Joe to prop up his campaign, he refused to call me. I’m a real Joe. As we know by now, Joe the Plumber is really a guy named Sam. Those of us named Joe take the business of being a Joe seriously. If your first name isn’t Joe, you’re not a Joe. It’s that simple. Jesus didn’t go by his middle name (which I think was Joe). John McCain ticked off the International Brotherhood of Joes and cost me my chance to operate out of Jack Lord’s old palace office. Let this be a lesson to all those in America that when you need a Joe, you come to a Joe and not a dofus named Sam.
MSNBC needs to fix their Joe crisis. When Joe Scarbough goes on vacation, they need a guest host named Joe to host Morning Joe. Mika Brzezinski and Willie Geist aren’t Joes. Neither is that Mike Barnicle guy. I’m not even sure if he’s really a Mike since he comes off as a Gary. MSNBC needs to understand that when you advertise a Joe, you better have a backup Joe ready to go. It can’t be that hard of a job unless you have to wax Pat Buchanan’s back during the commercial breaks.
THE DVD SHELF
A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All! is as great as advertised. This is the greatest Christmas special since Pee Wee’s Playhouse Christmas Special. The premise is simple: a ruthless bear has trapped Colbert in his cabin. He can’t get to New York to host his Christmas special with Elvis Costello. The holiday festivities come to him with truly an all-star cast without any faux-stars with E! reality shows. Toby Keith has confused me. The guy was a big turn off with his Karl Rove approved anthems. But on this special, Keith gives a hilarious song about what he’ll do to defend Christmas. John Legend performs the sexiest song about nutmeg. Jon Stewart brings a little Old Testament holiday wishes. Willie Nelson’s fourth wiseman song will never be sung at a Catholic Church’s midnight mass. Feist is angelic on all levels. You’ll probably wonder why you need the DVD when this special is being repeated on Comedy Central right now. The DVD has bonus features. You get a video Yule Log that gets an extra flame boost from books. There’s even a Colbert Advent calendar that’s better than the one your Aunt Eunice gave you. Plus be thrilled by the alternate endings. Your Christmas isn’t complete unless you give all your friends A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All!
Swingtown: The First Season gives a strange bit of hope that last summer’s series might be back for a second round of hanky-panky. Molly Parker and Lana Parrilla put the Bi into Bicentennial with this short season that centered around the 4th of July in 1976. The 13 episodes explore what happens when a normal married couple move to wild side of Chicago. Parker (Deadwood) and Jack Davenport (Pirates of the Caribbean) discover their neighbors are swingers. Parrilla is an ex-stewardess who knows how to tighten more than a seatbelt. Pilot Grant Show (Melrose Place) plays second banana to an amazing pornstache. The couples boogie down, but guilt grabs Parker and Davenport. They’re not sure if they’re cut out to cut loose. There’s also the issue of their daughter hooking up with her summer school teacher. Oddly enough that while the action takes place 32 years ago, the morality brigade went nuts over CBS running the series. But there’s nothing on this show that isn’t part of an afternoon soap opera. The DVD has a few bonus features including a blooper reel. They didn’t include the ’60s record deal commercial hosted by Peter Fonda. If the DVD does well and the show grabs a couple end of the year awards, Swingtown might be back next summer. This might be the perfect Christmas gift for the neighbors you want to covet in a group plan.
Man On Wire is a bold, death-defying examination of Phillipe Petit’s illegal wire walk between the World Trade Center’s Twin Towers in 1974. The film mixes recreation footage with the actual coverage of the historic day. They show Petit’s previous walks between Notre Dame Cathedral and the Sydney Harbor Bridge. He’s like an outlaw version of the Flying Wallendas. The execution of securing the wire between the buildings is more exciting than any scheme in the lame Ocean’s Eleven films. While the documentary should be the celebration of a daredevil’s spirit, there is sadness. How can a viewer not get misty eyed seeing the Towers still erect? Michael Nyman’s music from The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover plays during a section showing the Towers being constructed. And it hits how temporary this massive structure became. You need to watch this film twice – once for the Towers and another for Petit. Man On Wire is compelling cinema that pulls us into Petit’s passion to accomplish this outrageous feat. Man on Wire and The Dark Knight are the films that mark 2008.
Happy Days: The Fourth Season brought the word Mallachi Crunch to sports. “Fonzie Loves Pinky” was an epic three parter. Howard’s lodge is hosting a demolition derby. Part of the entertainment is female motorcycle daredevil Pinky Tuscadero. While the Fonz is favored to win the derby, he has to worry about the Mallachi brothers. They’re notorious for a move where they smash a car on both sides at once. During the episode Fonz falls hard for Pinky. But before he can marry her, they have to survive the Derby. As a kid, these episodes were more terrifying than when Fonzie jumped the garbage cans in season three. Pat Morita returns for “The Graduation.” During the end of school dance, Anson Williams jumps on stage and unloads a not even close to the 1950s ballad. How come you can’t find any Anson Williams records outside of a 45 on ebay and the show’s theme? Why aren’t there bootlegs of Anson Williams live at the Whiskey A-Go-Go? “Fonzie’s Baptism” brings the Fonz to Jesus. Wasn’t this a Family Guy episode? Happy Days: The Fourth Season was the final year before it “jumped the shark.”
Petticoat Junction: The Official First Season is the link between The Beverly Hillbillies and Green Acres. The action takes place at the Shady Rest Hotel that’s on the rail line near Hootersville. The place is run by Bea Benaderet (Jethro’s mother) and her three really hot daughters. They’re all a handful for the quiet community. The first few episodes have the immortal Charles Lane swearing to shut down the steam locomotive. Bea does her best to have him forget about it. Many of the Green Acres characters are also on this show including Sam Drucker (Frank Cady) running the general store. Adam West (Batman) plays the doctor on “My Daughter the Doctor” and “Hootersville VS Hollywood.” It’s amazing that this show ran for seven seasons, but never received the rerun action of its sister shows. The DVD includes the old commercials starring the cast. This first season has 38 episodes Southern hospitality.
Beverly Hills 90210: The Sixth Season is a must see for old timers who feel pangs of nostalgia when they catch promos for 90210 on the CW. The action on this boxset took place for 1995-96. The shocker of the season is Kelly Taylor (Jennie Garth) becomes a junky. She was the original Amy Winehouse. Who could imagine sweet little Kelly snorting up blow like an English supermodel? Donna (Tori Spelling) has to break with an abusive boyfriend. Dylan (Luke Perry) is ready to wed. Does this mean he’ll leave the show? I’m not giving it away. For many, this was the clutch season of heartbreak and triumph. For Steve (Ian Ziering), this was the year he joined AARP.
Cannon: Season One, Volume Two brings Leif Garrett back to the column. “Death Is a Double Cross” has Cannon riding the train to protect a millionaire’s wife and two children. Leif and Dawn Lyn are the kids. Lyn is best remembered as Dodie, the adopted daughter on My Three Sons. Turns out she’s also Leif’s sister. “”Treasure of San Ignacio” puts Cannon on the trail of thieves who rob a church’s artifacts. “To Kill a Guinea Pig” brings us the always creepy Geoffrey Lewis (who is not Robert Pine) to horrify Vera Miles (Psycho). She’s running a drug study at a prison. Lewis’ boss wants a certain inmate to be part of the program. Only Cannon can help her from this evil web. Even with his huge gut, William Conrad is still physical in scenes. He moves pretty well for a hefty guy. He’s got 13 clients on this boxset that need his expert detective help.
Jake and the Fatman: Season One, Volume Two means you’re getting a double dose of William Conrad fighting crime. This time he has help with Jake (Joe Penny) doing the heavy lifting. The big highlight of the second half of the first season is watching David Soul choking the life out of his wife on “How Long Has This Been Going On?” How can the star of Starsky and Hutch be so vicious? He’s a Yacht Rock superstar. Of course discovering your wife is banging a priest might get a man upset. He frames the priest, but Jake doesn’t buy it since he’s pals with the padre. Speaking of hall of fame creepy character actors, Joseph Ruskin is a mobster in “After You’ve Gone.” Did you know he’s the only actor to have appeared on every Star Trek live action TV show? “Lady Be Good” also has a Trekkie connection with Nana Visitor (DS9) killing a rich guy while he was staging his own death. Even though Conrad is slow to move and looks like he sleeps in his office, he knows how to solve a case. He didn’t get to be Los Angeles District Attorney by looking good on posters.
Perry Mason: Season 3, Volume 2 allows us to once more see America’s greatest TV lawyer in action. Raymond Burr accepts 14 more clients in this boxset. “The Case of the Slandered Submarine” allows him to visit a military court. There’s a few bodies connected to the testing of a high tech device. “The Case of the Singing Skirt” has a bunch of illegal actions taking place at a legal casino. The owner decides to set up a worker for the fall. But she does the smartest thing a you can do: hires Perry Mason to prove her innocence. “The Cast of the Prudent Prosecutor” has D.A. Hamilton Burger begging Perry to defend a pal. How much did that have to hurt Burger to get assistance from the man who kicks his ass almost every week in the courtroom? The picture quality is still stunning on these transfers. Just remember that anything you see in an episode of Perry Mason can’t be used on the Bar exam.
The Mod Squad: Season 2, Volume 1 unleashes the grooviest crime fighting trio. Pete (Michael Cole), Linc (Clarence Williams III) and Julie (Peggy Lipton) are still the mystery unit run by the Captain (Tige Andrews). “Lisa” has them protecting Carolyn Jones (Morticia from The Addams Family) from a mysterious hitman. The most obvious suspect is Joseph Ruskin. The Squad suspect Carolyn isn’t telling them her whole story. “Ride the Man Down” has them meet Richard Anderson (The Six Million Dollar Man‘s Oscar Goldman) after Pete gets nailed with murder charges. “The Healer” has a homicidal quack loose in the urban jungle. Dwayne Hickman (Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine) rubs elbows with Julie. Linc gets to fall in love again during “To Linc – With Love.” The object of his affection is a DMV instructor has a dark past. What could be darker than working for the DMV? The Mod Squad is still the coolest because Peggy Lipton makes me melt.
Gunsmoke: The Third Season, Volume 1 is perhaps your best quickie gift for Grandpa. Who didn’t grow up with their old man watching Matt Dillon cleaning up Dodge City? The series at this point is still black and white and only 30 minutes long. “Jesse” has my favorite plot of a son showing up in Dodge City ready to gundown the man who shot his daddy. Sadly this does not star Dennis Hopper. “Romeo” lets Robert Vaughn (Man From UNCLE) get romantic with a land baron’s daughter. Daddy isn’t happy and takes it out on the town. “Doc’s Reward” shows he can handle a gun like a scalpel. He puts a slug in Jack Lord. But in a shocking twist, Lord returns for his revenge. Fans of The Dick Van Dyke Show will get a thrill with Rose Marie in “Twelfth Night” and Morey Amsterdam in “Joe Phy.” Jack Klugman (Quincy) rides the range in Buffalo Hunter. He’s poaching on Indian land so the Sheriff has to do something that’s tantamount to murder!
Rawhide: The Third Season, Volume 2 reminds us that there was time when Clint Eastwood’s face didn’t look like a Francis Bacon portrait. Clint is youthful and not even in charge of the drovers. He keeps the cows moving as they cross paths with other stars. “Incident of the Running Iron” has one of them accused of rustling. Dwayne Hickman is part of the family that holds his fate. John Cassavetes (Killing of a Chinese Bookie) gets heated up during “Incident Near Gloomy River.” He’s been courting a woman who has eyes for his brother. “Incident of His Brother’s Keeper” puts Jack Lord (Hawaii Five-O) in a wheelchair. He gets nasty when Sheb Wooley takes his woman dancing. The Lord versus Clint should pay-per-view. Star Trek fans will get to see Spock vs. Clint during “Incident Before Black Pass.” “Incident of the Lost Idol” has Claude Akins (Sheriff Lobo) bounty hunting. Rawhide‘s extensive outdoor shooting makes it play more like a short movie than just a normal TV Western.
Bachelorman is a romantic comedy starring David DeLuise (Dom’s son) as a guy who knows what women need cause he worships them. He’s the second coming of The Tao of Steve with Donal Logue’s trainer. He gets involved with his neighbor (Josie and the Pussycats‘s Missi Pyle) only to discover she’s not a one night stand. Can he muster the energy to remain a swinging single? Blake Clark gets work without Adam Sandler writing the check. Clyde Kusatsu (Midway) plays the sushi making neighbor. He’s been in tons of shows over the years. Fans of naughty things on the internet will get to ogle Kira Reed. Bachelorman allows Missi Pyle to use her comic muscles for longer than her short time on Soul Plane. There are quite a few useful tips given off by DeLuise. The DVD contains the complete promo for TesteFlex.
Mister Foe is an unnerving piece of cinema from Scotland. Jamie Bell (Billy Elliot) has become a voyeur in the wake of his mother’s death. He suspects that his father’s new wife (Mallrats‘ Claire Forlani) killed her. Dad (Rome‘s Ciaran Hinds) tries to be understanding of his son’s weirdness. However the son’s peeping tom hobby is driving him nuts. It’s quite shocking to see Claire play a wicked stepmother. Her sweet face can turn diabolical. The weirdness get kicked up a notch when stepmother goes Cinemax After Dark on her stepson. Is she distracting him or just a slut? This is another small film that you’ll need to watch on your TV screen.
Hancock was such a big piece of crap that Stephen Sommers ought to have his name on him. The first half has a weird potential with Will Smith as Abel Ferrara with superpowers. Although the idea of super sperm nearly killing a woman was an old “why Superman has to pull out of Lois Lane” joke. Jason Bateman trying to clean him up was OK. When we get the plot twist with Charlize Theron, I thew up in my popcorn. Why did I think this film wouldn’t blow chunks with the star of The Wild Wild West, I Am Legend and Bad Boys II? Cause I’m a cockeyed optimist.
Horton Hears A Who proves you can make a feature length film out of a Dr. Seuss book that doesn’t get annoying like the dreadful live action Grinch and Cat in the Hat flicks. Horton goes CGI which allows them to truly explore Dr. Seuss’ illustrations without merely adapting them to human form. Horton the elephant discovers a whole world living on a speck. Everyone thinks he’s nuts including the mayor of Whoville. The Whoville folks don’t think they’re on a speck. Horton wants to put the speck in a safe place outside of his vicious jungle domain. It’s an action heavy flick with animals out to take down the weird elephant. Jim Carrey as Horton and Steve Carell as the Mayor play well of each other with their voice work. These guys should host a talkradio show. There’s enough adult level humor to make this worth watching with the kids. The DVD has tons of bonus features about the CGI work and vocal booth weirdness. You can even create your own animation. They tossed in a digital copy of the film so you can watch it on your iPod.
IN CASE I FORGET
Remember to have a great Festivus this year.
Charo has been saved for the Christmas column! Prepare to be coochie-coochie-cooooed!
I’ve banged on about for years, and I’m going to keep going virtual door to virtual door until the word gets out about QI. If you’ve never heard of the UK quiz program QI, you’re missing out on one of the funniest “educational” shows ever devised (the devisee being creator/producer John Lloyd, formerly of Blackadder, Not The Nine O’Clock News, and Spitting Image). The key to QI (which stands for “Quite Interesting”) is the central tenet of its philosophy – it’s not always being correct that counts, but being interesting (and funny). The interesting nature of a given piece of information spurs conversation and debate, eventually leading round to the learning of said informational nugget. Did you know that the Earth has more than one moon, for example? Or that otters kill crocodiles? Soon to make its debut on BBC1 (with its 5th season), it’s hosted by Stephen Fry and features a rotating panel of four comedians (one of which is mainstay Alan Davies) – and it’s one of the most hilarious shows I’ve ever seen… Honestly, you’ll laugh as much as you learn, and I still hold out hope a network in the US is smart enough to pick the show up uncut, as BBC America have been nothing but boobs about it (Hello, Comedy Central! Hello, Discovery Channel! Hello, PBS! Somebody!). Until then, you can grab a copy of both the first (
And while we’re on the subject of Stephen Fry, let me take a moment to heartily recommend the DVD collection of his recent documentary series, 
Few could have predicted that over 25 years later, Ralphie Parker and his Christmas quest for a Red Ryder 200-shot Carbine Action BB Gun would be a must-see holiday tradition. Based on the childhood stories of humorist Jean Shepherd, its impact continues to grow – the sales of Leg Lamps have skyrocketed, people are more conscious of eye safety, and no one will ever pronounce “Fragile” the right way again. Now, the 2-disc special edition has been repackaged as 
My good friend Glen Oliver and I waited years – YEARS! – for a company to treat 
Although the story is rather flat and doesn’t hold up to much scrutiny, 
I admit – I tried to avoid the pressure to fall in lock step with the “It’s the second coming” crowd who banged the drum loudly for 
There were plenty of worrisome moments over the past few years, where it seemed like the wonderful Walt Disney Treasures line of collector-friendly vault releases were doomed. This uncertain fate was particularly heartbreaking as it would have put the release of the complete run of Donald Duck cartoons in jeopardy. Thankfully, though, we’ve made it to the end of the Duck’s theatrical run with 
The second of this year’s Walt Disney Treasures sets focuses on the most beloved of all the Mouseketeers – Annette Funicello. This 2-disc set contains the complete run of 
Finally, the third and final release from this year’s Walt Disney Treasures wave contains the complete adventures of 
In a perfect world, shows like Freaks & Geeks never would have been prematurely cancelled, but in a near-perfect world, at least creator Paul Feig has carved out a niche for himself as an author who successfully mines all of the social and physical awkwardness of adolescence and turns tragedy into comedy – first in his non-fiction essays on his own childhood, and now in the laugh-out-loud functional adventure 
It was only a matter of time before the classic James Bond flicks made their high definition debut, and we’ve got a clutch of 6 to ring in the holiday season. You can whet your Blu-Ray Bond appetite with the fully restored 
Now that you’ve got the adults squared away, how are you going to keep the kids occupied? How about with the newly-revamped with sound FX silly skill game, 
This holiday season, I feel compelled to guide you towards a handful of UK (that’s Region 2, so be sure you have the capability to play them) DVDs from some stand-ups you should be following. First up is the latest offering from comedian Jimmy Carr, who supplements his too-numerous-to-mention hosting gigs to periodically return to the stage for some pocket money. This year, it’s 
If Jimmy’s humor isn’t pitch black and acerbic enough for you, then the first live DVD from Mock The Week regular Frankie Boyle might be what you’re looking for during the bleak midwinter festivities. Titled, wouldya believe it, 
Another Mock The Week regular getting his very first live DVD is Russell Howard. Imagine taking the Ritalin away from a hyperactive child, then sitting him down with a bowl full sugar. That, in a nutshell, is the comedic energy you’re dealing with here – and even better, it’s intelligent comedy that belies Howard’s age (he’s younger than me, the bastard). Bottom line – pick up a copy of 
To further reinforce Mock The Week as a veritable breeding ground for launching inaugural stand-up DVDs, another regular gets his first with 
We haven’t run out of Mock The Weekers yet, as the host of the show has also got his second stand-up DVD dropping this holiday season. 
Surely that’s all of the UK panel show regulars, right? Well, no, because 8 Out Of 10 Cats team captain and QI regular Sean Lock has got his very own debut DVD, 
Oi! I almost forgot that Bill Bailey has a new DVD out, from his last stand-up tour, in the form of 
And while you’re at it, pick up the 
Prior to laying eyes on the 
However, if you can’t afford the big fig, a very nice alternative is Sideshow’s 
If you’ve yet to spend some time with the addictive fun of Nerf Darts and their accompanying launchers, rectify that particular black hole in your life with the ultimate Nerf Dart launcher – the 
Well, Nerf even has an answer for that, too, as they’ve produced an adult version of their blasters in game form, perfect for office conflicts of domestic disputes – the 
While I still wait (it seems) in vain for the DVD release of Car 54, Where Are You? and Sgt. Bilko, I can at least console myself by watching the complete 4-season run of 
For criminy’s sake – it’s taken forever, but we in the US have FINALLY gotten a box set containing all of the various travel documentaries hosted by Python Michael Palin in the uber-wonderful 
Even though they’ve done just about everything possible (including throwing the kitchen sink at it) to tear down the beloved characters and stories of their relaunch, time and unfortunate editorial machinations have only made the Keith Giffen/J.M. DeMatteis/Kevin Maguire run of Justice League International look all the more enjoyable by comparison. Ignore all of that Uber Final Infinite Crisis of Something Or Another business and pick up the collected 
Speaking of the League, Roger Stern and John Byrne re-teamed last year for a JLA story arc that’s now been collected in 
Try as we might, there’s not doubt that this holiday season will cause at least some small amount of aggression. How to deal with it, then? Why, your very own 
The first major HBO miniseries to make the transition to high definition is the Tom Hanks/Steven Spielberg produced 
I admit – I was wary of Wall-E. Cars had left me a little cold (and the creepy, post-apocalyptic, human-less but made by humans world it was set in was just disturbing), but Ratatouille was more enjoyable than I thought it was going to be, and my faith in Pixar was ready to be fully restored. And it was. It helps that I experienced the film sitting beside my 4-year-old nephew, who was in the process of taking in his very first movie on a movie theater’s BIG SCREEN. It was a magical time from start to finish, and the DVD brings it on home. If standard definition is still your cup of tea, then I recommend the 
Kudos to Stephen Colbert for reviving the tradition of a pundit holiday special – just like the George Plimpton celebrations of yore – with 
The fourth season of 
The Brits have a knack for taking the tired old sitcom format, blowing it up, and creating some absolutely brilliant television. Those bastards. Most definitely to be included in their long line of triumphs is Spaced, a show about a pair of twenty-something slackers – Tim & Daisy (Simon Pegg & Jessica Stevenson) – who pose as a professional couple in order to get a North London apartment. Sure, Tim could be a comic book artist if he tried, and Daisy’s quite a good writer, but being successful in either of those careers would mean applying themselves… By, of all things, *working*. Gah! With a gaggle of off-the-wall friends and acquaintances, if you think of it as a twenty-something Seinfeld with a postmodern pop culture twist (there are frequent surreal diversions) you wouldn’t be far off the mark. After much legal wrangling, fans and soon-to-be fans in the US can now pick up 
Just when the summer doldrums were beginning to set in, I found out just why everyone has been fawning over 
They took a little while to wade in, but the wait was definitely worth it when one of the first two high definition releases from the cinema mavens at Criterion is their already-stunning special edition of 
The other Criterion release to go Blu-Ray is 
When I was but a wee lad still fresh in this phenom called Star Wars and eagerly awaiting the release of Return of the Jedi (we knew there was a third one coming, because they went off to save Han), one of my favorite Christmas gifts of all was the Millennium Falcon. I still remember tearing open the box and then spending what seemed like hours putting all of the decals on before finally sliding the lock-legged Han & Chewbacca into the cockpit and navigating the starship around the room courtesy of the center handle (later that morning, all of my figures took turns playing holo-chess in the cabin area while Luke whacked the training ball around). I can only imagine the jaw-dropping joy that me from then would greet the new 
If you still haven’t treated yourself to the complete run of Monty Python, now’s the time to pull the trigger and pick up 
It’s not Wall-E, but there’s plenty of wonderful production artwork to be found in the pages of Chronicle Books’ latest Disney “Art Of” book, 
Also from Chronicle, you can explore the fascinating history and groundbreaking output of a true videogame pioneer in 
As a good friend of mine says often – and practically lives his life by – a robot makes everything better. Make your holidays better with the 
I’ve made no secret in the past of my love for the various vinyl Disney figures that Medicom has been releasing in Japan and that are, thankfully, now distributed in the US by Sideshow. The Medicom sculpts are always spot-on and put any of the domestic licensees to shame. For the holidays, I wanted to spotlight a trio of Vinyl figures based on the original comic book versions of 
Ask people what their favorite classic film is, and most often it’s a toss-up between Citizen Kane and Casablanca. Personally, I’ve always been a Kane-ite, but Casablanca is high up on the list. Even though the film has been on DVD for quite awhile, Warner Home Video worked their digital mojo, crafting a deluxe, fully-restored special edition. The film never looked better… in fact, it almost looked *too* good. The frame is so clean, I’d almost expected to see someone wearing a digital watch. Some purists don’t like this level of restoration, but I’m all for any process that makes a film look as good as it possibly can. That restoration is now beautifully packaged in the 
If Casablanca has left you wanting a little more classic cinema to explore, then you might want to pick up (be careful, though – it’s heavy) the 
If you’re holiday isn’t nearly bizarre enough, achieve the proper level of bizarreitude with 
Yeah, I’m a sucker for the Guinness Book of World Records. There’s just something so compellingly exciting yet sad about the various and sundry attempts at dubious immortality “achieved” by the people, events, and tragedies included in the 
Trekkies wanting to wipe the pain of JJ Abrams Trek High can take some solace playing with their very own 
Nothing says “perfect gift” like something with no practical purpose except to entertain, and that’s certainly the case with the 
Home Movies is one of those shows that – despite making it 5 seasons – was cancelled before its time. Victim of apathy at Cartoon Network (a few influential individuals though it didn’t fit into their vision for the Adult Swim line-up), the animated adventures of budding filmmaker Brendon (Brendon Small) who, along with his friends Melissa (Melissa Galasky) and Jason (H. Jon Benjamin), crafted some truly Ed Wood-ian movies, was one of the most well-written character pieces ever to grace the small screen (be it live action or animation). The most vibrant character, though, would definitely have to be the kid’s gym teacher and emotional man-child, Coach John McGuirk (Benjamin, again), who had designs on Brendon’s single mother. Discover the series via the now comprehensive 
For the little kiddies on your list, the Beeb have released the complete first and second seasons of their Disney Channel hit 
I caught an episode of Yo Gabba Gabba! the other day, and if any show can rightfully claim the mantle of “Kiddie Show Beloved By Stoners”, it’s this intriguingly bizarre combination of music and costumed characters, If you doubt me, check out 
After her turn in the Christmas special “The Runaway Bride”, some were worried about Catherine Tate reprising her role of Donna Noble as the 10th Doctor’s new companion in the fourth series of 
I’m going to give you one reason – and one reason only – to pick up Cartoon Network’s 
If your idea of chestnuts roasting by the open fire is spending time with a vengeful Vietnam vet, then you’ll probably want a copy of 
I’ll be honest with you – Freaks and Geeks was a painful show to watch when it originally premiered (for far too brief a life) on NBC in the Fall of 1999. It was painful because I could relate to every bit of the awkward adolescence that the characters on screen were going through – my high school years were reflected in the tribulations of Sam and Lindsay Weir, and their assorted friends and enemies. Freaks and Geeks was the first (and so far only) show that presented the teenagers as they really are, and what high school is really like. And it was painful to see that on screen, because it dredged up my bitter memories of gym class, of disastrous social situations, and just the perpetual teenage ennui. But the beautiful part is that once you get past the pain it dredges up, Freaks and Geeks became a catharsis. It became a way of measuring your growth as a person against the mirror being presented on screen. And it was a damn good show, to boot. Well-written, funny, and emotional, it was… Well, it was life. Not a comedy, not a drama, and nothing as hackneyed as a “dramedy,” it merely existed as one of the most well-crafted shows ever to get slaughtered upon the network altar of quick returns and poor judgement. Credit goes to creator Paul Feig and producer Judd Apatow for giving us a glimpse of greatness, however briefly it shone. Of course, the coda on all of this is that we eventually got the long-awaited DVD set, collecting all 17 episodes (with their original period song-packed soundtracks intact) alongside a ton of bonus features. Originally a limited edition, now the general public can purchase the 8-disc special 
For the headbanging Adult Swim fan on your shopping list, there’s the uncensored complete second season of 
Make the season shagadelic (yes, I just used that old chestnut) with the high definition release of 
It’s a Yabba Dabba good time for Hanna-Barbera fans with 
Comprehensive box set fever has also hit 
While kudos must go to Rhino for keeping the Mystery Science Theater 3000 DVD releases coming over these long years since the show’s cancellation, the show’s new DVD home – Shout Factory – has really elevated the game with their 
Glad tidings from the folks at Cinematic Titanic (MST3K creator Joel Hodgson and alums Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Frank Conniff, and Mary Jo Pehl) comes in the form of a fresh take on that horrid holiday perennial, 
When HBO’s brilliantly dark western Deadwood began its first season, the time was only a few weeks following the massacre of Custer’s troops in 1876. Into the lawless South Dakotan town rode two men – one a bitter ex-lawman, and the other a man looking to start a new life – and both ran afoul of the local heavy who owns half the town. What followed was an epic drama of operatic heights, and one you can watch in its entirety with 
Ah, but that isn’t the only HBO series you should be picking up. Empty out your wallet at the same time by snagging 
If you’ve been patiently avoiding the single-disc releases for the next seasonal batch of that happy chap that lives in a pineapple under the sea, then you’ll rejoice in your purchase of 
If you want your holiday gift-giving to be full of blood, battle, and none-too-thinly veiled homoeroticism, then you’re probably going to want to pick up the 
Every comic book series seems to be getting the snazzy deluxe treatment nowadays – with some bewildering choices – but certainly deserving of the honor is Mike Mignola’s Hellboy. The clothbound, hardcover 
I’ve spoken in the past of just how much I love the mental acrobatics of magician Derren Brown, but one of the sore points is that his specials have been absent from DVD even as his series have gotten released. Well, all of that is rectified with 
As a child of the 80’s, I was absolutely taken with Ghostbusters when it came out. I had the toys, I used to pretend I was a Ghostbuster, and before everything turned sour with Ghostbusters 2, I delighted in the Saturday morning adventures of the guys on The Real Ghostbusters. After a few disappointing single-disc collections from Sony, Time Life has hit the ball out of the park with the wonderfully packaged 
I’d say that watching George Carlin’s 14th and final HBO special was a bittersweet affair, but it seems like such an inappropriate word considering just how funny 
A long time ago, not too terribly far away, there was a company that produced some of the most wonderful and faithful Star Wars prop replicas to be had. Sadly, due to corporate issues both various and sundry, the timeliness of the releases began to wane, and then the company decided to drop the license entirely. What became of it? Well, the core group who handled the license at that other company decided to strike out on their own, and they formed 
I remember always looking forward to watching Mr. Bean whenever it would air on HBO (remember that?). Rowan Atkinson’s devilish character never failed to entertain. Like an ersatz Harold Lloyd, Bean is an almost silent physical comedy, and I’m delighted that all 14 episodes are on DVD in 
For all of the dramatics found in the stage and screen versions of Frost/Nixon, the kinetics found in the actual interviews – collected for the first time on 
There’s nothing quite like seeing the stop motion magic of Ray Harryhausen in high definition, which is exactly what fun you can have with the Blu-Ray 
Rights issues prevent regular Rifftrax commentaries from being released as physical DVDs with the movies they’ve riffed, but no such issues exist with the public domain short subjects Mike, Kevin, and Bill have been doing over the past year. What does that mean, exactly? That means we get almost 90 minutes of goofy fun with 
Transformers fans both young and old will have something to snag this year, with the younger crowd enamored of the current Transformers Animated series able to get their very own talking, and incredibly large 
For old-timers with too much nostalgia and cash on hand, there’s the 
You may not think “horror” when you think “holidays”, but John Carpenter’s 
The “Judd Apatow” brand of comedy has always been hit or miss with me, but when it does hit a sweet spot – as it does with 
If you’re not all politicked out this holiday season, then you might want to pick up the 
Fans of Jack Sparrow can now get the entire swashbuckling trilogy – The Curse Of The Black Pearl, Dead Man’s Chest, & At World’s End – in high definition courtesy of the Blu-Ray 
Eager to suck every last nostalgic dollar out of my long-suffering wallet, the re-launched classic GI Joe line that hooked so many kids in the 80’s is still going strong, with their lovingly updated versions of old school favorites. This year has brought – alongside the regular figures ($5.99 SRP each) – the addition of vehicles, including the 
There are some flaws here and there, but I was incredibly impressed with 
It’s certainly a case of diminishing returns, but the Brendan Fraser-led Mummy films are a far sight better than the cursed Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull, and there’s no better way to watch the technical hoo-ha at hand than via the Blu-Ray editions of 
Previously only available as a Time Life exclusive, now one and all can pick up the complete 
Every once in a while, a truly spectacular, must-have catalogue release makes its way to DVD. Add to that exclusive list the Blu-Ray edition of the Cinerama epic 
Just when you think that there can’t possibly be another collectible line that will hook you, along comes 
And just as subversively cute and irresistible are the various tiny, cartoony “Heroes” lines by Hasbro, featuring well-known characters in kiddie-friendly tooned-up forms and sold in ready-for-fun two-packs ($5.99 SRP each). Marvel Comics characters are featured in the “Super Hero Squad” line, Indiana Jones has “Adventure Heroes”, The Transformers are featured in “Robot Heroes”, and GI Joe has now got 
You know, Will Smith’s I Am Legend is actually a decent adaptation of the Richard Matheson novel – up to a point. That point is when we leave behind Smith’s Dr. Robert Neville – who has stayed behind in a decimated New York City to try and find the cure for a virus that has wiped out mankind, leaving a small survivor base of violent humanity, the immune Neville, his dog, and the hope of more people out there somewhere. The film begins to flail about in the cesspool of Hollywood mediocrity when the crappy CG infected monstro-humans show up, with their implausible anaconda mouths and plastic skin. It’s a shame it all falls apart, because they had something there. See for yourself with the new 
And now, because I have to shop for little nephews, how about a digression into some toys geared towards the little ones on your list? In fact, the first pair of items comes from that somewhat disconcerting yet oddly ingratiating Nick Jr. show The Wonder Pets. First off is the titular rescuers in their 
For the slightly older kids, there’s the 
He has yet to make the transition to the US, but Alan Carr – currently riding high in the UK – is a comedian worth keeping an eye on, should he make his way across the pond. Until then, I’d certainly recommend you pick up a copy of his first stand-up DVD, 
Let pure evil keep your tootsies warm with the big and fluffy 
It’s goofy, but darned if my nephews don’t have a ball (no pun intended) with 
Oh no! Just when you thought it was safe to hang out at the Quick Stop…
Paul and Storm are a comedy music duo, and they have been performing as a duo since 2004. Before that, they were one half of a cappella band Da Vinci’s Notebook for about 12 years. A Paul and Storm show is part music concert and part standup/improv comedy”“just enough of both to fit neatly in neither category. They like to engage the audience, and are known to award snack cakes and/or other prizes for good (and sometimes bad) behavior. Their show would be PERFECT as a cable special, and would make lots of money for whichever brave channel decides to air them first.
Jeff MacDougall 2: Electric Boogaloo – You may know Jeff from his short-lived stint as reigning challenger in MoSF#1 – ultimately losing to master Jonathan Coulton. He’s back and ready to make the holidays his bitch. Because really, nothing says Christmas music like the sweet sounds of Jeff MacDougall.
I suppose I am what you could call a “Multi-Instrumentalist”. That is a nice way of saying “Jack-of-all-trades, Master-of-none”. I began playing drums as a teenager and spent a great deal of energy during my 20’s trying to “make it” in the music biz. As a drummer, I have had the opportunity to play with some pretty incredible musicians, garnering literally DOZENS of fans over the years. In 2004 I joined the band Celestial Static, and spent several years melting some face with good friends Jeremy and Julie Elzerman. Once that ran its course, I decided to spend more time locked away in my studio, writing my own songs and learning to play guitar, bass and sing. It doesn’t pay the bills, but I have a good time doing it.
My name is Joe Lamb, I’ve been known online as JoeCovenant, or JoeCov, Or just Cov for the last decade or so. I’m 45 and have been performing for 40 of those years. Up until 2005 I was solely a professional actor/singer, but I am now also a Civil Servant and work for Her Majesty. I’ve been playing guitar since I was 10, but still think Bar Chords are things played in pubs. (I can’t do ’em!) I’m not too bad on the Bhodran and can pick out a tune on a keyboard when pushed… really hard. I’ve always been frustrated that my ideas outdistance my abilities, so my output is always rather simplistic… But I like to think that, occasionally, synergy does it’s job well! My last album, a passel of LARP songs written ‘in character’, was recorded in the same way the songs for this contest will be recorded… Analogue, in my living room, through a quickshot stick-mic (Yes, really!) Hearing some of the songs that have been created through this contest I feel privileged to be involved! I’ll do the best I can!
“BucketHat” Bobby Matheson is an awkward teenage accordionist and multi-instrumentalist who specializes in superhero-themed and “Comedy” music, and who works for minimum wage in the fast food industry. With his style varying from polka to folk, punk to pop, and then again from rock to bluegrass, we’re left unsure what to expect. One thing for certain is that Bobby doesn’t like talking about himself in the third person, and therefore will stop this silliness right now.
Charlie Wolf has always been much better at writing songs than at writing third-person biographies about himself. While still a teenager, Charlie Wolf is already an accomplished ‘multi-instrumentalist’, playing guitar, bass, accordion, and keyboards. In the past year or so, Charlie has began playing private parties and coffee-house gigs in the Los Angeles area, which sounds way more interesting than it actually is. His music ranges from hilarious comedy songs to tender ballads, and more often than not, somewhere in between. He would like to thank the academy, but cannot, because he does not know where the academy is or how they would like to be thanked.
Hello everyone. I’m Bram Tant, a 19-year-old Belgian student who enjoys playing the electric/bass guitar, singing, and writing songs in his spare time. I’ve always dreamed of becoming a professional musician, and I’m psyched to have been selected for this awesome contest. Having greatly enjoyed the first edition, I want to test my humble songwriting Fu against other (hopefully) great artists. Unfortunately, I do not own decent recording equipment – all I have is a computer microphone. Still, I’ll try the best I can to record the best song I can write. About musical influences – lately I’ve been really awed at/inspired by the work of Jonathan Coulton, and I found out about this contest through his website/forum. Else, I enjoy a bit of everything. My musical style is a bit hard to define: I play a bunch of stuff like soft/hard/classic rock, punk, metal, folk, jazz, lots of improvisational stuff, and I seem to have a knack for writing love songs, probably because of a subconscious yearning for love… Anyway, I wish the best of luck to all the other competitors, and may the best win!
“Rusty’s Rocking Jamboree” is a one-man, music and comedy show for family audiences, starring Russ Rogers. While in college, twenty-some years ago, Russ Rogers was in a band called, “Buc Blaster and His Ukulele Rangers.” There are several noteworthy alumni of “The Ukulele Rangers,” including Song Fu Master Michael J. Nelson. Later, Rogers and Andy LaCasse (also a Ukulele Ranger) partnered to form the almost near famous, children’s music and comedy duo, “Kit and Kaboodle.” After ten years and three albums (still available on iTunes and CDBaby.com), “Kit and Kaboodle” broke up over musical differences. LaCasse was musical … an d Rogers was just different. Now, “Rusty’s Rocking Jamboree” has been entertaining family audiences around Minnesota for the past five years.
The Masked Stranger (a.k.a Neal John Mac Rae), is a self proclaimed noise/folk artist from Nova Scotia, Canada. Although his work has gone completely unnoticed on an official level, he has still managed to garner several fans from Australia and amoungst his close friends. The Masked Stranger project started in 2004 when Neal John recorded “The River Song”, a simple panflute tune he furiously augmented and destroyed on his computer. Since then he has created roughly 30 other distinctly more destroyed and demented tracks under the moniker of The Masked Stranger. His music has been described as “a total disregard for musical theory”, “aaaaaaaah!”, “raw and grating”, “annoying”, “Twisting is a word I want to use to describe it… Very natural and earthly”, and “disturbing and yet… strangely enjoyable”. His most well liked and most consistant piece “Rue The Red” was described by Cape Breton goregrind artist Devin Meaney as “a posessed man jigging out on the strings of his creator. Like a puppet, devouring the flesh of god. And this is exactly what it reminds me of, no joke.”. This awkward and soil laiden musician’s journeys into the abrassive and the tribal only threaten to continue.
Heather Henderson has been entertaining America since she was seven years old. She got her start as a mini dancing superstar and co-host on Dance Party USA. Her career then made the natural progression towards Sesame Street and most recently a principal role in the Disney film Annapolis. Striving constantly to develop as an artist, The Big H sings with the bad-ass 60’s retro soul group SOULAMITE!, performs with the Revival Burlesque troupe in philadelphia, makes short films, writes funny songs, and is always looking for the next good audition. She hopes to have her own totally crappy and misquoted Wikipedia entry one day.
Fun, Zesty, Acoustic, Energetic, Crunchy. Some of these words describe the Baritone-Ukulele-wielding N8 Shivers (the others describe Taco Bell’s newest food-like invention). He began writing songs at the age of two, and taught himself to play the uke a mere 17 years later. N8’s Family members claim he’s the best uke-playing song writer they’re related to. He enjoys Stand-up Comedy, Coen Brothers movies, Chilly sandwiches, and Canadian sitcoms. His Turn-offs include Banana Flavored Things, Republicans, and Mountain Dew. N8 is currently employed as a Wizard in southern Ohio.
Scott Wolfson has been performing and recording since he was 13 years old. For more than half of his life he’s been a part of the New York City music scene – most notably, as the guitarist and songwriter for the “freak pop” band The Right Bastards, and most recently as the front man for The Buzzkill All-Stars. A graduate of NYU, he majored in musical performance and minored in music theory and composition. His songwriting strives to combine the wit and wisdom of Elvis Costello, Paul Simon, and Tom Waits with the pop sensibilites of Squeeze, XTC, and Crowded House. His unique voice and stylings add another dimension to the already strong songwriting.
Bryce Jensen has been writing songs off and on for over twenty years, but he has rarely shared any of them beyond his friends and family. His styles range from a capella to heavy metal with a lot of wimpy finger picking stuff in between. As most of his songs are horrible, Bryce has agreed to enter this contest as a service to the other contestants, making them appear even more talented by comparison.
Jeff began playing guitar in 2003. He wrote his first comedy song in early 2004, and later that year, he wrote a song that was actually funny and in key, unlike his earlier works. He began playing shows after accidentally opening for a local band while passing through a bar. He continues to play because nobody has told him to stop.
East Carolina was formed in 2006 when friends Aaron (vocals, keyboards, accordion, etc) and Stuart (electric guitar, bass, keyboards, etc.) realized that, though often praised individually for their musical prowess, together they would be a virtually less-stoppable musical force. Combining in their music elements of alternative and classic rock, comedy, jazz, hilarious banter, polka, and more, East Carolina creates music that is unique, pleasurable, and often unclassifiable. Their original songs range in topic from Spanish love gone wrong to social anxiety to properties of gasses, and beyond. East Carolina is thrilled to be participating in the Masters of Song Fu competition and looks forward to sharing their songs with all of you.
