THE TIME TRAVELER’S WIFE

Many women accuse their husbands or boyfriends of being emotionally unavailable at one time or another.  “The Time Traveler’s Wife” is feminine sci-fi that postulates what if he had a really good excuse?

Henry DeTamble (Eric Bana) is a great guy, a girl’s dream.: sensitive, smart, caring and attentive but has one major flaw: he just disappears from time to time.  “Yeah, it’s a problem” his wife Claire (Rachel McAdams) says nonchalantly to a concerned friend at one point in the film.  The time traveling “problem” for Henry started when he was in a car accident with his mother.  Different things seem to trigger the jumps such as stress, alcohol or even television, though none of these really seem to make a difference.  Henry has no control over when he’ll jump nor does he have control as to where or when his destination will be.

The screenplay by Bruce Joel Rubin echoes his previous films, “My Life” and “Ghost”.  It’s a tender love story that deals with impossible what-ifs and impending loss.  It’s a well made film that never gets boring.  It’s rather clever and director Robert Schwentke (“Flightplan”) deftly handles Henry’s time jumping often with humor and frustration and never feels forced.

The problem is, there isn’t a compelling case for Henry and Claire to be the great loves of each others lives.  Claire first meets Henry when she is a little girl and he appears to her naked (when you time travel you inconveniently don’t take your clothes with you which leads to a lot of petty theft and embarrassing situations for Henry.)  He appears to her many times in this meadow, she learns to leave a set of clothes for him, and at her young age he becomes her ideal man.  But what does she become for him?  He says she makes him feel “safe” and never alone.  Well, sure, okay, but what do these two have in common?  What do they like to do on a Saturday night?  Do they laugh at the same jokes?  These questions are never dealt with any satisfaction.

Still, it’s a refreshingly original film and definitely worth checking out.

JOHN HUGHES (1950 to 2009)

John Hughes tragically died last week of heart attack in New York City while taking a morning walk, shocking the entertainment world and no doubt inspiring many John Hughes Film Festivals in living rooms across the globe.

He was the Barry Sanders of filmmaking, he left in his prime and everyone hoped he would make a come back (Breakfast Club 2, Ferris Bueller’s Next Day Off, or 32 Candles even.)  Okay, maybe more accurately we all hoped he would return like Terrence Malick after a 20 year hiatus like he never left off.  But John Hughes just wasn’t that kind of filmmaker, he said his piece and was happy to walk away.

As a kid growing up in the northwest suburbs of Chicago in the 1980’s, the films of John Hughes had a larger resonance for me and those I grew up with.  Hughes was a dedicated Chicagoan who was insistent on filming many of popular films in and around the Chicago area.  Great writers are great observers and Hughes was an exceptional observer of the human condition.

Most remember Hughes as the voice of the mid-80’s teenager.  To say his best films are about teenage angst is myopic and blatantly however ignores two his best works: the always popular at Thanksgiving holiday, “Planes, Trains, and Automobiles” and the tragically underrated “She’s Having A Baby”.)

No other filmmaker has had a run quite like Hughes.  Aside from the films he directed in rapid fire fashion (which I’ll get to), he wrote “Mr. Mom”, the “National Lampoon’s Vacation” films, “Pretty In Pink”, “Some Kind Of Wonderful”, “Home Alone”, “101 Dalmations”, and “The Great Outdoors”.  Those films alone are fairly impressive but from 1984 to 1989, Hughes wrote and directed SIX films that are truly memorable.

Sixteen Candles (1984)

“That’s why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they’d call them something else.” — Samantha’s Dad

The film that put Hughes on the map as the auteur of teen angst in the 1980’s.  “Sixteen Candles” follows a day in the life of girl whose family forgets her sixteenth birthday while planning her older sister’s wedding.  It’s everything we’d come to expect from Hughes’s films: funny, honest, and heartfelt.

The Breakfast Club (1985)

“We’re all pretty bizarre. Some of us are just better at hiding it, that’s all.” — Andrew

This film was ranked the #1 high school movie of all time by Entertainment Weekly.  It works because, unlike many films, it’s simple.  Hughes understood that you could say a lot about high school by breaking it down into the core cliques: the brains, the athletes, the basket cases, the princesses, and the criminals.  Then take a representative of each one of those social classes and throw them in all day Saturday detention and you have the makings of a great ensemble film, and “The Breakfast Club” was one of the best.  It would never have worked if you had two brains or two jocks or two criminals.  The film teaches us that while we may all seem different on the outside, if you separate us from our cliques, we realize that in the human condition we are quite similar.  Hughes understood that and that’s why this film is accessible to teens and adults alike.

Weird Science (1985)

“It’s a really long story Chet. Gary and I were messing around with the computer Friday night. We decided to make a woman and we did and she went crazy and she messed up the whole house.” — Wyatt

Hughes supposedly wrote this film in 2 days and at times it feels like it.  But only a really talented director could make this preposterous plot work.  It’s a complete male fantasy: create the perfect woman with a model’s body and guy sensibilities.  And against all odds it completely works.  To me, it’s a film that suggests we learn to embrace imperfections in others.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)

Life moves pretty fast. You don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.  — Ferris Bueller

This is my favorite of Hughes’s teen films because of it’s carpe diem ethic and unwavering optimism.  Plus, as a kid growing up in the suburbs of Chicago, I’ve taken more than a few days off in that wonderful city.

In college I was asked to join a panel to discuss the film’s 10th anniversary and it’s impact.  At the time, and I think this still holds true, I observed that Cameron is really the main character of this story.  Cameron is the hero, the one who faces true adversity and inner demons coming out a changed, confident man at the end of the day.  It’s a story about friendship to me.

Also, this film was supposedly written in 6 days.  Combine that with the 2 days Hughes used to write “Weird Science” and he had a pretty productive week.

Planes, Trains, & Automobiles (1987)

“You wanna hurt me? Go right ahead if it makes you feel any better. I’m an easy target. Yeah, you’re right, I talk too much. I also listen too much. I could be a cold-hearted cynic like you… but I don’t like to hurt people’s feelings. Well, you think what you want about me; I’m not changing. I like… I like me. My wife likes me. My customers like me. ‘Cause I’m the real article. What you see is what you get. ” — Del Griffith

The first film directed by Hughes that featured adults and adult situations and to me, he doesn’t miss a beat.  As I said before, this is now a cult classic that gets a lot of spins on DVD players around Thanksgiving.  It’s relatable in that we’ve all been stranded somewhere at some point while traveling and we just want to get home.  I’ve always seen this as a film about patience.

She’s Having A Baby (1988)

“And in the end, I realized that I took more than I gave, I was trusted more than I trusted, and I was loved more than I loved. And what I was looking for was not to be found but to be made.” — Jake Briggs

This is my favorite of Hughes’s films (edging out “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off”) mostly because it’s one that not a lot of people have seen.  I’m a fan of the hidden gem and this is one.  It’s a remarkable achievement in writing and filmmaking.  It’s one of Kevin Bacon’s best performances, one of Alec Baldwin’s earliest, and it’s hard to imagine Elizabeth McGovern didn’t skyrocket into the stratosphere off this film.  This was, in my opinion, the apex of Hughes’s directing talent.  Hop on YouTube and search for “This Woman’s Work” by Kate Bush, you’ll find the montage that sums up this film in the third act and if you don’t get moist in the eyes then you’re dead in the heart.

I left out two other films that Hughes directed, “Uncle Buck” (1989) and “Curly Sue” (1991).  Both are fine films, but they also showed Hughes was running out of gas a bit.  Perhaps he blurted out what he wanted to say too fast and could never recover, though we always hoped he would just one more time.

He was a unique writer and an underrated director (so few screenwriters understand film is a visual medium, but Hughes did.)  And his contributions to music (introducing America to British Pop for example) should not be underestimated.

The great thing about film is that it’s forever.  Even though John Hughes has left us, his films live on.  Every year a new generation of teenager will discover “Sixteen Candles”, “The Breakfast Club”, and “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off”.  And every year a weary traveler will reminisce about how their journey home was in some way like “Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.”Â  And I hope expectant fathers discover “She’s Having A Baby”.

Rest in Peace, Mr. Hughes.

Brett Deacon will twitter (twitter.com/brettdeacon) the punchline to Bender’s joke about the blonde woman, the poodle, and the two foot salami.  Maybe.

EXCUSE ME, STEWARDESS

What’s happenin’ all you hip cats and hot mamas? I’m glad ya’ll found time to join me up in here tonight, because I’m about to blow ya minds with the tale of Black Dynamite (Michael Jai White). He’s a cool dude that used to work for the C.I. of A. He was the best. He was a war hero back in Nam. He knows karate like that kid. And he pulls the foxes like the best of “˜em. I guess you could say he is one bad mother–“¦ Oh. Well, the editors of this here piece have informed me that I don’t need to be cussin’ in this here review, so I’ll try to keep it elementary for you cats.

So, I guess I should hit you fine folk with a little about the plot. Alright, you got my main man Black Dynamite, right? Well, his brother went undercover to this drug deal and ended up gettin’ himself killed. Black Dynamite didn’t take too well to that, so he goes on the prowl looking for the killer. After teaming up with this brother, Cream Corn (Tommy Davidson), they decide to do away with all those jive turkeys who is sellin’ smack to the kids. Black Dynamite loves the little kids. Especially orphans. So they gather up a few other cats and raid the warehouse where they think the drugs are at, but they find a big surprise that leads all the way to the top (the very top). Confused? That’s okay, because the plot matters about as much as how many miles per gallon I can get on my Cadillac. It’s irrelevant to the big picture, baby.

And what a picture it is, people. The director, my main man Scott Sanders, and Michael Jai White (who came up with the story and helped to write it) done a fantastic job of puttin’ this thing together. I guess it would be a spoof, but it would also fit right in with the blaxploitation flicks of the 70’s. This would have been a great addition to Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino’s Grindhouse. I definitely would have stayed in my seat another ninety minutes because Black Dynamite will have you laughin’ harder than any movie you gonna see this year. It’s finely paced and smarter than other spoofs coming out these days. I was laughing throughout the whole thing and I was laughing hard. One of my sexy foxes had to calm me down right there in the theater, man. About ten minutes into the flick, Black Dynamite remembers an incident in Vietnam that he will never forget. He tells the story so vividly and sincere, but it’s hilarious. Everybody in the audience was laughing so hard, it was hard to hear what the cat was saying. I didn’t think they would be able to top that thing, but it only got better. As Black Dynamite takes on some kung fu treachery, the moment when the villain has his hand cut off provides the funniest part in the flick.

It’s the subtle things that really take Black Dynamite from good spoof film to classic comedy. Actors are replaced mid-scene, the way Black Dynamite and his troops solve the mystery of what they found in the warehouse is brilliant, and the soundtrack sometimes tells us exactly what is going on. The boom in the shot has been done a hundred times, but here it seems intelligent and fresh.

I’ve always liked that boy, Michael Jai White, and here he shows that he could be a leading man if given the chance. He’s pitch-perfect in the role and always has a straight face. He delivers every single line with impeccable timing and his “smile” is righteous. He has an adequate supporting cast around him, but this is essentially a one man show.

It almost hurts that I got to see Black Dynamite as part of the L.A. Film Festival and won’t be able to catch it again for a few months. I wanted to peep it again as soon as the credits crawled up the screen (with some funny jokes). So don’t you go thinking this is one of those spoofs that a cat like Keenan Ivory Wayans might put out. Get you a sexy mama and haul ass to the nearest big screen as soon as this baby comes near you. You won’t be disappointed.

Jesse Rivers wishes he had a chance to live in the 70’s.

TERMINATOR: STARVATION

The year is 2018. Skynet has risen and the few humans left (Terminator: Salvation makes it seem that there are only a handful of humans remaining) are trying to win the war against the machines. This is a few years before John Conner (Christian Bale) will acquire his legendary status and he comes across a new kind of enemy. Unfortunately, this is not the core of the film. Conner doesn’t even seem to be the primary character. Mostly, we follow Marcus Wright (Sam Worthington), an apparently resurrected man who was lethally injected after serving time on death row in 2003 (For a crime that is never explained). He awakens fifteen years later, having not aged a minute, and befriends a young Kyle Reese (Anton Yelchin), the future father of John Conner. Reese is soon kidnapped by the machines and Conner is forced to trust Wright in rescuing his dad.

I tried to find a way to eloquently put into words the way I feel about this film and the following is what I came up with. Enjoy.

Oh, Terminator: Salvation
When you were announced, it scared me
There was no cause for celebration
And you were going to be directed by McG

But my interest was ignited
With the casting of Christian Bale
And I will admit that I got excited
When the trailer was unveiled

So when the lights went down
My eyes lit up
But what I actually found
Was that you really did suck

The story was bland
Common sense you were ignoring
The acting was far from grand
In fact, it was quite boring

You took away the depth
The legend you have devoured
Maybe you could have saved yourself
But you didn’t utilize Bryce Dallas Howard

So when they captured Kyle Reese
Why hasn’t he died yet?
With that single little piece
It would  be victory for Skynet

You tried to be clever
But smart you were not
With in-jokes during the bad weather
But unintentional laughs were all you got

But I have to say
There are a couple reasons why I would recommend it
At the end of the day
The cinematography was absolutely splendid

And I also cannot lie
I may give it another visit
Because I won’t even try
To say the action scenes were not exquisite

But that wasn’t enough
At least not for me
I had to deal with enough stuff
While watching Terminator 3

Go ahead McG, ask the main man
You know this is not what Cameron intended
Obviously, I’m not a fan
But at least Michael Ironside was in it

So I’m quite disappointed with you
I wish I could keep our relationship intact
But if Terminator Salvation is the best you can do
Please, I beg you, don’t come back

VROOOM!

*MINOR SPOILER TO FOLLOW*
So that is my review, but there is one more thing I would like to comment on. In the last bit of the film, a T-800 arrives. A real T-800, with the face of Arnold Schwarzenegger. It doesn’t 100% work, but it’s pretty damn close. I’m not sure of the specifics of how they did this (apparently they CGI’d Arnold’s face onto someone else’s body), but I think it’s a great achievement. It leads me to wonder how close we are to being able to do this on a consistent basis. How many actors will we be able to replicate? I’m not saying that computer graphics will overtake actors anytime in the future. We still need the personal connections to a role, the emotions, and so forth, but if someone were to use this in a different way, what could happen? Is it possible that we will sit in a theater one day and see Jimmy Stewart chasing Tom Cruise? Or maybe Cary Grant investigating George Clooney? The possibilities would be literally endless. I’m extremely interested to see where this goes.

-Jesse Rivers would love to see a Jackie Chan/Ingrid Bergman movie.

And, as always, check out Bagged and Boarded.

It’s beginning to get warmer here in Hollywood and that can only mean one thing ““ the summer movie season is upon us. Or it could mean the Armageddon is approaching. Or it could just mean that it’s May in Los Angeles. Regardless of the weather, the big budget blockbusters are arriving. I must admit that I’m a little skeptical and underwhelmed by the lineup. It could be stemming from the writer’s strike that began in late 2007, but there are still a few films to keep an eye on. “X-Men Origins: Wolverine” jump started the entire thing and this weekend, filmgoers will boldly flock to their local theaters to check out the J.J. Abrams revamp of “Star Trek.” But after that, do we know what is in store for us? I do. Take a look.

THEY ARE WHAT WE THOUGHT THEY WERE

These are the films that will offer no surprises. That doesn’t mean that they shouldn’t be seen or they won’t bring some quality, but the movies themselves and the view of these films are fairly simple to predict.

UP: It will be funny. It will be sweet. It will be beautiful to look at. It will win the Academy Award for Best Animated Feature next year. I was not quite as taken as everyone else with “Wall-E,” but Pixar has an almost perfect track record (I say “almost” because I didn’t find “Cars” to be up to par with the rest of their projects). With a very good director in Pete Docter and a wonderful voice actor in Ed Asner, “Up” will only continue this tradition. Is that even up for debate? Yes, I know. That last sentence wasn’t very funny.

YEAR ONE: Harold Ramis is a great comedic director. Jack Black is going to be Jack Black . Same with Cera. There will be a few funny cameos and a lot of historical jokes that will be smarter than the ones that you will find in “Night at the Museum.”

TRANSFORMERS:REVENGE OF THE FALLEN: Michael Bay. Big robots. Megan Fox. That’s it, right?

THE MOVIES THAT COULD SURPRISE YOU

TERMINATOR: SALVATION: In 1984, James Cameron gave us a different kind of sci-fi movie with a memorable villain and one of the most popular movie quotes of all time. Cameron returned in 1991 to complete his vision. Can anyone dispute that “Terminator 2: Judgment Day” is one of the most exciting action films you can watch? The third in the series wasn’t great, but it wasn’t bad upon a second viewing. When McG was announced as the director for the fourth installment, I was not pleased, to say the least, but I’m a huge fan of Christian Bale and the trailer gave me hope. Could this film live up to the first two? God, I hope so. And if it turns out to be a heap of metal garbage, then McG and I are done professionally. I wish I was funny.

DISTRICT 9: Have you seen the teaser? It’s outstanding. I’m still not quite sure what to make of it. Half of it looks like a documentary. This movie could be the sleeper hit of the summer. It looks smart and effective.

THE HURT LOCKER: When this comes to your town, I urge you to see this flick. Even if it doesn’t come to your town, go seek it out. It’s worth it. Many movies have come out in the past few years focusing on the war in Iraq and these movies have failed at the box office. Is it because the movies just aren’t that good? Is it because the war is still going on and people are tired of hearing about it on the news? I don’t know the answer to that, but I do know that this is a genuinely moving and suspenseful film. There were a few scenes that were quiet and subtle and after they were over, I realized I had been holding my breath the entire time.  Jeremy Renner completely embraces his role and gives a magnificent performance. Don’t sleep.

THE MOVIES THAT MAY DISAPPOINT:

BRUNO: The trailer was really funny and I’m sure the movie will be as well, but will it live up to its predecessor? A bunch of people know Sascha Baron Cohen from Borat, he has accumulated a lot of money from his endeavors and is engaged to a hot little lady in Isla Fisher. Is it possible that Cohen will play it a little safer than the last go round?

INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS: Isn’t Tarantino due for a dud? We all know that Quentin is not the most modest man on the planet and he has been working on the script for this film for over a decade. Is he trying to put too much into the story? Trying to squeeze in all those ideas he has come up with over the years? Will it be a masterpiece or will it just be a mess? The cast is comically diverse and the film was shot within a very short window in order to make the deadline for Cannes. I’m hoping for the best, but has Tarantino gotten too big for his britches?

PUBLIC ENEMIES: This is the one that scares me the most. Michael Mann, in my eyes, has only made one bad film (take a wild guess), but it was the most recent one. Could that have just been a kink in his armor or a director on the decline? Johnny Depp is a great actor, but was he chosen because he was right for the role or because of his box office draw? Channing Tatum as Pretty Boy Floyd? J. Edgar Hoover played by Billy Crudup? Regardless of anything (Miami Vice included), I must give Mann the benefit of the doubt.

And there you have it, folks. Another summer. Another movie. I will see you all at the movies. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go stand in line for tickets to “Dance Flick.”

-Jesse Rivers loathes the heat, so he spends all summer in the local theater. He doesn’t watch movies, he just hangs out. And be sure to check out Bagged and Boarded.

There’s a commercial running for the new Star Trek film that says “This is not your father’s Star Trek.” And for a change there is truth in advertising.

This new Star Trek is a conversion to the summer blockbuster. Whereas most Star Trek films in the past were released around Thanksgiving, this one will play well on a hot day where you can hide away in an air-conditioned theater with a big bucket of popcorn and an ice-cold soda.

I enjoyed most of the previous Star Treks (particularly Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, the underrated Star Trek III: The Search for Spock and Star Trek: First Contact), but I’m not what one would consider a Trekkie. I’ve seen maybe one episode of the original series and a good portion of Star Trek: The Next Generation, but that’s about it. And I can say unequivocally that I enjoyed this Star Trek far beyond anything that’s come before it. This is the most fun Star Trek has ever been.

Everything about this film is given a fresh spin: the way starships jump to warp, the sound of the phasers, the way teleportation looks. And the thematic nature of this Star Trek is a departure for the previous ten films. While the series was about an intergalactic crew of explorers and the films were by and large Horatio Hornblower in space, this film is much more like Star Wars with grand themes of world destruction and epic destiny.

The film is part origin story, part revenge story (perfect combination for a summer movie, right?). A Romulan named Nero (Eric Bana) travels back in time seeking revenge for something that happens in the future (I won’t spoil it). His ship, the Nurada, possesses the Death Star-like technology to destroy planets. It’s up to a brash young crew of Starfleet cadets to stop him (hint: they are onboard the Starship Enterprise).

Chris Pine’s James T. Kirk is perhaps the biggest departure from the original characters (the changes are plot driven,). The trailer points out that Kirk’s father was captain of a starship for 12 minutes and saved 800 lives (including Kirk’s). Trekkies, no doubt, will realize this is a deviation from canon because Kirk’s father originally lived to see Kirk become captain of the Enterprise. So Pine’s Kirk is brash, rebellious and reckless in addition to the qualities that Shatner’s Kirk had (charismatic, strong, smart leader, good with the ladies).

The rest of the cast is fairly in line with their original counterparts. Zachary Quinto does an admirable job as Spock, Karl Urban is a scene stealer as Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy, and Simon Pegg’s Montgomery Scott provides plenty of comic relief.

The film is not without its flaws. I won’t get into many of them here as they would induce spoilers. The first half of the film covers a lot of time while the second half covers a very short period. Some of the humor is a bit over the top and simplistic (particularly Scotty’s alien sidekick). And for some reason the new Enterprise’s engineering looks like a brewery.

The major drawback is, I fear, that this film may alienate the core, devoted Trekkies. I won’t get into major spoilers but there are major changes in the Star Trek canon in this film. I hope Trekkies accept the changes because efforts to reboot the franchise through additional television series and Next Generation movies have by and large failed to cross over to mainstream audiences. I sincerely hope that Trekkie nation embraces this film and the ones that will surely follow. Change can be a good thing – and, in this case, a very good thing. Come on, Trekkies – Yes we can!

Brett Deacon joined the Twitter nation: @brettdeacon.

Brett here.  Stepping in for this edition of the Greatest Movie Blog of All Time is a pretty cool piece by “Bagged and Boarded”‘s Jesse Rivers!  I’ll be back Monday with a piece on politics and movies, but until then, enjoy!

DON’T RETREAD ON ME
BY
JESSE RIVERS

It’s over. Everything’s over. I did everything wrong. I want my life back. I want it back before everything got fucked up. I want to be a baby again. I want to be new.

““ Susan Orlean in Adaptation.

It’s almost an unforgivable sin to be original in Hollywood. Sure, you have your small indie gems and surprise hits that creep through now and again, but then what happens when they become successful? They start a trend. Trends rule the film industry. Slasher flicks (“Halloween”, “Alice Sweet Alice”) became huge in the 70s and made a return in the late 90s. Movies spawned from older television shows (“The Addams Family”, “The Fugitive”) brought in some revenue. Now, we have comic book movies (“Iron Man”, “The Dark Knight”) breaking records and some old friends (John McClane, Rambo, Indiana Jones) coming back to entertain us. Most trends come and go, but there’s one that has only become more prevalent over the years. They are called, appropriately enough, remakes.

For years, I didn’t understand the concept behind the remake. Why would any studio spend millions of dollars to produce a film that’s already been made? And most of the remakes just couldn’t stand up to the originals. I even became outraged as pretentious filmmakers thought they could make a classic film even better and ended up shelling out something that would make an average film-goer avoid the superior original. If you’re going to remake something, why not take a movie with a good idea that did not completely live up to its promise. “Logan’s Run” springs to mind. The simple answer is because these remakes usually garnered a profit. I eventually learned to push my anger aside and enjoy remakes for what they are”¦ well, some of them at least.

To me, there are four different types of movie remakes that we will explore today. I’m staying away from remakes that are not actual remakes. This usually happens with true stories, particularly major historic events. There have been quite a few films about the Titanic, but they are not actually remakes. James Cameron’s “Titanic” has nothing to do with the 1953 version of “Titanic” starring Barbara Stanwyck and Robert Wagner. With that being said, let’s move into our first category of movie remakes.

Straight Remakes ““ This may be the most common and the primary reason I initially had problems with remakes in general. This usually happens when a producer believes no one cares about an older film (the dreaded black & white) and hopes to make millions from audiences who would like to see a newer, glossier version. Did we really need a new version of “Gone in 60 Seconds”? Does the more recent “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” even come close to be as terrifying as Tobe Hooper’s low-budget masterpiece? There’s a trailer out there for the remake of “Friday the 13th”. This bothers me because it shouldn’t even be considered a remake. It looks like a sequel. You are going to have about twenty minutes of Jason’s origin, which everyone already knows anyway, then it basically becomes just another installment of the franchise. I don’t think this is a reboot like Warner Brothers has accomplished with “Batman” and trying to accomplish with “Superman”. The only reason to call this a remake is that writers ran out of ideas to get kids back at Camp Crystal Lake. A few years ago, it was rumored that Quentin Tarantino would helm a remake of “Friday the 13th”. Now that would have been interesting. I must admit, though, that these are not always bad. John Carpenter directed a remake that was miles ahead of the original with “The Thing”. Martin Scorsese got in on the action with the suspenseful “Cape Fear”. If done right, straight remakes can actually turn out pretty good, but they are few and far between.

One to see ““ “The Fly” directed by David Cronenberg
One to avoid ““ “War of the Worlds” directed by Steven Spielberg
One I’m anticipating ““ “Bad Lieutenant” to be directed by Werner Herzog
One I’m dreading ““ “Footloose” to be directed by Kenny Ortega
One I’d like to see ““ “The Night of the Hunter”

Norman Bates

Nice try”¦

Reimagining ““ This is the one that actually makes sense. It’s by far my favorite. A reimagining is when a filmmaker takes the same basic concept of a previous film and provides their own take on it, sometimes even completely changing genres. I think these are especially fun when a director has a real love for the original. Zack Snyder’s remake of “Dawn of the Dead” was the very definition of bloody fun. On the other hand, Tim Burton’s “Planet of the Apes” was far worse than even any of the original sequels. The western genre certainly owes a lot to this (and this could easily fit into our next category, but I think it works better here). Both “The Magnificent Seven” (“Seven Samurai”) and “A Fistful of Dollars” (“Yojimbo”) were inspired from Akira Kurosawa films. The perfect example of a director’s love of a film that they have remade is Peter Jackson’s “King Kong”. Jackson took the simple story from the 1933 original and expanded on the themes he found the most interesting and ultimately made one of the best remakes of all time. An example of one that I don’t think quite succeeded is Rob Zombie’s “Halloween”. Although I was not a fan of his previous two films (“The Devil’s Rejects” had its moments), I was really looking forward to see what he could do with this. What he did was completely take away the mystique of Myers. I understood what he was trying to accomplish, but I think Zombie failed.

One to see ““ “Scarface” directed by Brian De Palma
One to avoid ““ “Guess Who” directed by Kevin Rodney Sullivan
One I’m anticipating ““ “Alice In Wonderland” to be directed by Tim Burton
One I’m dreading ““ “The Road to Hell” (remake of Streets of Fire) to be directed by Albert Pyun
One I’d like to see ““ “Weird Science”

Foreign to Domestic ““ I don’t always agree with this one, but I understand it. Most American filmgoers wouldn’t watch a foreign-language film. “I want to watch a movie, not read it.” Change the language to English, throw in a big-name actor, crank up the CGI and you have yourself a bonafide hit. A lot of money has been made in recent years with this type of remake in the horror genre. Some are good (“The Ring”). Some are bad (“Dark Water”). This particular trend won’t be ending anytime soon if only because Martin Scorsese finally won an Academy Award for turning the Hong Kong action movie, “Infernal Affairs” into the Best Picture winner, “The Departed”. And please, do yourself a favor and take the time to watch Jean Cocteau’s French version of “Beauty and the Beast”. The animated Disney version will completely leave your memory.

One to see ““ “Vanilla Sky” directed by Cameron Crowe
One to avoid ““ “Godzilla” directed by Roland Emmerich
One I’m anticipating ““ “The Lives of Others” was going to be directed by Anthony Minghella
One I’m dreading ““ “Battle Royale”, director TBD
One I’d like to see ““ “Le Samourai”

No one will be able to do this again.

Why? ““ That’s the best title for this category I could come up with. This doesn’t happen very often, but I can’t help but to wonder why this happens at all. I’m referring to the rare occurrence that a filmmaker remakes one of his own movies. Alfred Hitchcock did it with “The Man Who Knew Too Much” and is the only successful one that comes to mind. Most of these could actually fit into the previous category, but I thought this deserved its own spot. Case in point is George Sluizer remaking “The Vanishing”, Michael Haneke doing it with “Funny Games” and Takashi Shimizu coming to America with a remake of “The Grudge”. And please, for the love of God, do not ever let Martin Scorsese remake “Taxi Driver”.

One to see, avoid, etc ““ N/A

I know that the trend of Hollywood remakes will never end. Actually, remakes of remakes are being produced including “The Thing”. I’m sure I’ll be watching remakes until the day I die, probably not even aware that some of them are remakes. I only plead that producers, actors, and directors respect the original material and do it correctly. I’m thinking specifically about the just announced remake of a beloved 80s film called “The Last Dragon” in which Samuel L. Jackson will portray the updated version of Sho’ Nuff. Or return to my original thought: Take bad movies and remake them into good ones.

Please comment below with remakes you love, hate, dread or anticipate. (Notice the rhyme?)

-Jesse Rivers is only envious that he can’t remake a film himself.

First of all, yes, I’ve been late with my blog. I apologize to all my loyal readers (hi Mom!). I know you’ve been dying to know where I’ve been (not under a rock) and what I’ve been up to (yes, I did meet Steven Spielberg – he’s short but quite friendly).

I haven’t been able to see many of the summer movies so far, but I was very fortunate last Monday to catch a sneak preview of a film everyone is dying to see”¦

The Dark Knight

“Some men just want to watch the world burn.” ““ Alfred Pennyworth

There has a been a lot of hype surrounding this film. At first it was almost solely about Heath Ledger’s performance as the Joker and how because of his tragic death he was all but assured a posthumous Oscar nomination. This, of course, brought forth a lot of backlash saying no performance would be worthy of that. And when the film started to be screened it was compared, as a sequel, to “The Godfather Part II” and “The Empire Strikes Back” in terms of how it topped the original.

On Monday night I caught an early IMAX screening and let me tell you, “The Dark Knight” lives up to NONE of the hype.

It exceeds it.

It is simply a brilliant film. Forget about it being a Batman movie, a comic book movie, a summer movie, an action movie, a crime movie, etc. It is a BRILLIANT film. This is, simply, why we go to the movies. You will find yourself thinking of all the clichés like “edge of your seat”, “heart-pounding”, “jaw-dropping”, “white-knuckled” and “can’t keep your eyes off it” – and actually experience them.

Comparisons to other fantastic sequels are unfair because it so far exceeds its predecessor. “The Godfather Part II” was great, but “The Godfather” was equally brilliant. “Empire Strikes Back” was easily the best Star Wars film. But “The Dark Knight” makes its predecessor “Batman Begins” look like the campy Adam West show – and I thought “Begins” was a pretty damn good movie. While the first film was inspired by Japanese samurai films, this was clearly inspired by great crime thrillers such as “Heat” and “Seven”.

I don’t want to spoil this film for you all with plot details. I will say that it is a study in polarity. Of white knights and dark knights. Of order and chaos. And where we all fall in between them. It’s surprisingly topical, dealing with issues such as personal privacy and terrorism. And it’s a fantastic, globe-trotting action movie owing more to the James Bond franchise than any other comic book film. It relies on practical effects over CGI and is all the more stunning for it (George Lucas, take note). Seeing a semi-truck and trailer flip over its front end will astonish you – and they actually did that in the streets of Chicago.

Most of the cast from “Batman Begins” is back. Michael Caine is perfect as Bruce Wayne’s Jiminy Cricket, Alfred Pennyworth, offering sage advice with a sardonic and honest wit. Morgan Freeman returns as Lucius Fox, a brilliant businessman and scientist. And Gary Oldman is given even more to do as Lt. Jim Gordon, who tries desperately to hold his city together while the Joker tries to tear it apart. Each of these actors has at least one great scene. Gordon has one that will make you stand up and cheer.

New to this instalment is Maggie Gyllenhaal taking over for Katie Holmes as Rachel Dawes. Gyllenhaal brings a more mature side to the character than Holmes was capable of. Aaron Eckhart plays straight-as-an-arrow DA Harvey Dent. Eckhart’s Dent is hard working, incorruptible, and humble – that is, until a shocking tragedy leaves him emotionally and physically torn in two.

But above everyone in an outstanding cast stands Heath Ledger. Ledger’s performance is simply stunning. His Joker will go down in history as one of the best screen villains of all time. Ledger makes the Joker amoral, psychotic, terrifying and hilarious all at the same time. The Joker is also the smartest character in the film, manipulating everyone like marionettes. The performance is absolutely pitch perfect and simply the best performance Ledger ever gave. An Oscar nomination is required here – not because of sympathy for a talented young actor who died too young, but because the performance merits it.

I saw it this film on IMAX and I was skeptical that it would work given most of the film is in a 2.35 to 1 aspect ratio while IMAX is traditionally more like 1.33 to 1. But it is absolutely worth making the effort to see these action scenes in IMAX.

I can’t give enough praise for this film. I was blown away. This isn’t just the best movie of the summer, it’s the best of the year.

Brett Deacon apologizes for his tardiness. Please accept his note from Epstein’s mother.

There are two seasons that a film lover looks forward to every year: late winter when the studios release their “best” films they hope to contend for awards and summer movie season. The latter is all about the fun (or at least it should be). Let’s be honest, last summer was DREADFUL. One disappointment after another from emo Spider-man to Michael Bay managing to make transforming robots smashing each other to pieces boring. There were a few bright spots (John McClane’s return in “Live Free or Die Hard” comes to mind) but overall it was the worst summer for movies that I can recall.

But it’s a new season and therefore a time for fresh optimism. So for you loyal readers, I’ve compiled a list of this summer’s most anticipated releases, complete with an early review!

MAY

May 2

IRON MAN – EARLY REVIEW!

Who Directed it? Jon Favreau (“Made”, “Zathura”)

Who’s In It? Robert Downey, Jr., Jeff Bridges, Terrence Howard, Gwyneth Paltrow

“Iron Man” is perhaps the most faithful comic adaptation to date. Robert Downey Jr. simply IS Tony Stark, a sort of rock star weapons designer who suffers a crisis of conscience when Afghani terrorist use his own weapons against him. Stark is taken prisoner and forced to build them weapons. Defiantly, Stark builds a war machine in order to escape. Upon his return, he vows to use his genius for good and refines his suit design into a sleek red and gold war machine.

RDJ really carries this movie with his wit and charm. As I alluded to earlier, he truly embodies Stark’s boozing, daredevil, playboy charm. Stark’s persona is what Bruce Wayne tries to put forth to make people forget he’s Batman. Terrence Howard has some great moments as Jim Rhodes, an Air Force corporal and perhaps Tony’s only friend. And Gwyneth Paltrow is fantastic as Stark’s Girl Friday, Pepper Potts. Bridges isn’t quite as menacing as he should be as Stark’s business partner/rival Obidiah Stane, but that’s a small quibble (if I have one complaint about the film it’s that Iron Man lacks a worthy adversary).

“Iron Man” certainly doesn’t disappoint. It’s undeniably fun and the best part is you don’t have to be a fan of the comic to get it. It’s a great movie to kick off the summer. Should you see it? Abso-frickin’-lutely.

May 9

SPEED RACER

Who directed it? The Wachowski Bros (“The Matrix”)

Who’s in It? Emile Hirsch, Christina Ricci, Matthew Fox, Susan Sarandon, John Goodman, Richard Roundtree (no I didn’t make that last one up)

What’s it about? A remake of the popular Japanese animated import, Speed Racer is a race car driver (thank God because otherwise that name would be awkward) in a world that appears to be straight out of a meth addict’s nightmare.

Why should you see it? It’s probably going to be the most visually ambitious film of the summer if not the year.

Why should you avoid it? It may also be the dumbest movie of the year.

What Happens in Vegas”¦

Who Directed it? Tom Vaughan (“Starter For Ten”)

Who’s In It? Ashton Kutcher, Cameron Diaz

What’s it about? Near as I can tell, this is a cautionary tale warning that marriage + alcohol will result in you being married to either Ashton Kutcher or Cameron Diaz and being regretful about it.

Why should you see it? What the previews have only recently let on is that Kutcher’s best friends are played by Rob Cordry and Zach Galifianakis. Those two might just be worth the price of admission on they’re own. Also I really enjoyed Vaughan’s film “Starter for Ten”.

Why should you avoid it? Movies about two attractive people acting vindictive and vicious towards each other rarely work. See: last summer’s “The Break-Up”.

May 16

THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: PRINCE CASPIAN

Who Directed it? Andrew Adamson (“The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe”, “Shrek”)

Who’s in it? All the kids who were in the previous film. And Tilda Swinton.

What’s it about? The Pevensie children journey back to Narnia (without the wardrobe) one year later in Earth time (but 1300 years in Narnia time”¦ talk about jet lag) to find that Narnia has basically turned into Iraq on a good day.

Why should you see it? You may be a fan of the books.

Why should you avoid it? Personally, I’m not a fan of the books and the first film bored me to tears. I expect more of the same here.

May 22

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL

Who Directed it? Steven Spielberg (duh)

Who’s in it? Harrison Ford (natch), Karen Allen, Shia LeBeouf, Ray Winstone, Cate Blanchett, John Hurt

What’s it about? Indiana Jones goes lookin’ for the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, whatever that is. Oh, and Marion Ravenwood returns. And Indy may be a deadbeat dad. I think that’s it. No wait, Cate Blanchett shows up as a sexy Russian villainess.

Why should you see it? It’s freakin’ Indiana Jones! It’s summer! Do I need to draw you a map? Do you need Indiana Jones to help you use it?

Why should you avoid it? Let’s see, George Lucas resurrecting a popular trilogy 20 years after the last film… what could possibly go wrong? I really hope I’m wrong.

May 30

SEX AND THE CITY

Who Directed It? Michael Patrick King (the series creator)

Who’s in it? Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Cynthia Nixon, Kristen Davis, Chris Noth

What’s it about? Picking up 4 years after the HBO series left off, Carrie (Parker) still hasn’t married Big (Noth). If you can’t decipher that then this movie might not be for you.

Why should you see it? I may be in the minority among most men, but I always enjoyed the series.

Why should you avoid it? If you didn’t like the series then avoid at all costs.

JUNE

June 6

YOU DON’T MESS WITH THE ZOHAN

Who directed it? Dennis Dugan (who previously directed Adam Sandler in “Happy Gilmore”, “Big Daddy”, and “I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry”)

Who’s in it? Adam Sandler, Emmanuelle Chriqui, and no doubt Rob Schneider will show up to say some variation of “You can doooo eeeet!”

What’s it about? An Israeli secret agent follows his dream to become a hairdresser in New York City.

Why should you see it? The trailer is kinda funny. It’s an interesting concept, co-written by Judd Apatow.

Why should you avoid it? Most of the same things were said about “I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry” last summer.

June 13

THE INCREDIBLE HULK

Who directed it? Louis Leterrier (who previously directed the “Transporter” movies and the Jet Li movie “Unleashed”)

Who’s in it? Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, Tim Roth, William Hurt, Tim Blake Nelson

What’s it about? The Hulk gets a complete revamp (Marvel would prefer you forget the Ang Lee interpretation) as Edward Norton takes over as scientist Bruce Banner, who’s a bit sloppy with gamma rays.

Why should you see it? Edward Norton will no doubt be a nerdier Bruce Banner than Eric Bana. Also, rumor has it Robert Downey, Jr. shows up in a cameo as Tony Stark.

Why should you avoid it? The Hulk still looks like a cartoon to me in the trailers. I’m not convinced.

THE HAPPENING

Who directed it? M. Night Shyamalan

Who’s in it? Mark Wahlberg, Zooey Deschanel, John Leguizamo

What’s it about? Not many plot details out there. I’m guessing it that something happens and then there’s a twist ending.

Why should you see it? God, I dunno. I haven’t been a fan of Shyamalan’s for quite some time. I still think “The Sixth Sense” is overrated. But if you need a reason to see it, I’ll go with this: Shyamalan is not listed among the cast credits.

Why should you avoid it? Two reasons (out of what could be several): “Signs” and “Lady In The Water”.

June 20

GET SMART

Who directed it? Peter Segal (“50 First Dates”, “The Longest Yard”)

Who’s in it? Steve Carell, Anne Hathaway, The Rock, Alan Arkin, Terence Stamp

What’s it about? Yet another movie update of a 1960’s TV Show, Carrell plays Maxwell Smart, a bumbling secret agent who will no doubt bumble through the entire movie.

Why should you see it? Carell is usually pretty funny. Anne Hathaway is in it. Bill Murray reportedly makes a cameo. Anne Hathaway is in it.

Why should you avoid it? The TV show was rather campy – expect more of the same from the movie.

THE LOVE GURU

Who directed it? Marco Schnabel (directorial debut)

Who’s in it? Mike Myers, Jessica Alba, Romany Malco, Justin Timberlake, Verne Troyer

What’s it about? An American-born but Indian-raised love guru (Myers) journeys to Toronto to help a hockey player reunite with his estranged wife.

Why should you see it? This is the first live action film Myers has made since 2003’s “The Cat In The Hat”.

Why should you avoid it? Looks like a retread of Myers’s previous films, which haven’t really held up over time.

June 27

WANTED

Who directed it? Timur Bekmambetov (director of “Night Watch”, Russia’s highest grossing film of all time)

Who’s in it? Angelina Jolie, James McAvoy, Morgan Freeman, Terence Stamp

What’s it about? Based on the little-known graphic novel, James McAvoy plays an average joe who is recruited by an elite group of assassins who can make bullets move with their mind.

Why should you see it? The action in the trailer looks pretty amazing. Angelina Jolie is back to her dangerous girl roots (no, that’s not a hair joke).

Why should you avoid it? Oooohhh”¦ bullets doing more than moving fast in a straight line? I miss the good ol’ days when bullets moved at normal speed.

WALL-E

Who directed it? Andrew Stanton (“Finding Nemo”, “A Bug’s Life”)

Who’s in it? Voice talents of Sigourney Weaver, John Ratzenberger, Fred Willard, Jeff Garlin

What’s it about? 700 years into the future, humans have left earth and a cute, pint-sized robot (WALL-E) is left to clean up the mess.

Why should you see it? Pixar bats at an unbelievably high average.

Why should you avoid it? You should only avoid this film if you hate America. And animated robots. And have no heart. Those three tend to go hand in hand, I’m thinking. Then again, maybe this is the first Pixar film that bombs, and wouldn’t you like to be ringside for that?

JULY

July 2

HANCOCK

Who directed it? Peter Berg (“Friday Night Lights”, “The Kingdom”)

Who’s in it? Will Smith, Jason Bateman

What’s it about? Will Smith plays the title role, a superhero with Superman-like powers and Lindsay Lohan-like problems.

Why should you see it? Somewhere in the Patriot Act it was made a law that all citizens were required to see a Will Smith movie if it was released on 4th of July weekend. You don’t want to spend the rest of the summer at Guantanamo do you?

Why should you avoid it? A superhero with no mythology is a risky proposition. I say stay away. Be right back, there’s a knock at my door”¦

July 11

MEET DAVE

Who directed it? Brian Robbins (“Varsity Blues”, “Norbit”, and yes – he was the rebel on the ’80s sitcom “Head of the Class”)

Who’s in it? Eddie Murphy, Gabrielle Union, Elizabeth Banks

What’s it about? Pint-sized aliens (all Eddie Murphy) land on earth and inhabit a robot who looks suspiciously like Eddie Murphy.

Why should you see it? God, do you really want to?

Why should you avoid it? Too many reasons to list. I miss the old Eddie.

HELLBOY II – THE GOLDEN ARMY

Who directed it? Guillermo Del Toro (“Hellboy” “Pan’s Labyrinth”)

Who’s in it? Ron Perlman, Selma Blair, Doug Jones, Jeffrey Tambor, John Hurt

What’s it about? Hellboy returns to fight evil from a mythical world.

Why should you see it? The first Hellboy was definitely a guilty pleasure and a lot of fun. Ron Perlman is perfect in the title role.

Why should you avoid it? If you weren’t a fan of the first film, you’re probably not going to like this one.

July 18

THE DARK KNIGHT

Who directed it? Christopher Nolan

Who’s in it? Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, Michael Caine, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Morgan Freeman, Gary Oldman

What’s it about? Batman returns to fight his greatest nemesis, the psychotic Joker.

Why should you see it? So many reasons. Nolan’s first Batman film, “Batman Begins” is already considered one of the best comic book adaptations of all time and that’s rather high praise. Nolan doesn’t treat the franchise like it came from a comic book. Heath Ledger’s posthumous performance as The Joker may very well be his best ever.

Why should you avoid it? It has a rumored running time of 170 minutes, so those with short attention spans need not apply.

MAMMA MIA!

Who directed it? Phyllida Lloyd (feature film debut)

Who’s in it? Meryl Streep, Amanda Seyfried, Pierce Brosnan, Stellan Skarsgard, Colin Firth

What’s it about? Based on the popular Broadway musical, a bride-to-be invites three men to her wedding, one of whom may be her biological father. And there’s a lot of singing and dancing to ABBA tunes.

Why should you see it? All of “The Dark Knight” screenings may be sold out.

Why should you avoid it? You hate ABBA, musicals, and/or Meryl Streep (though I can’t imagine anyone hating Meryl).

July 25

THE X-FILES: I WANT TO BELIEVE

Who directed it? Chris Carter (creator of the series)

Who’s in it? David Duchovny, Gillian Anderson

What’s it about? Not a clue. But I imagine it involves Mulder and Scully investigating something spooky.

Why should you see it? David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson’s chemistry carried the series through nine seasons and one previous feature film. And admit it, we’re all curious to know what they’ve been up to.

Why should you avoid it? It’s been more than 10 years since the last film and almost 10 years since the series ended. Is this show even relevant any more? Do young audiences recognize these characters?

STEP BROTHERS

Who directed it? Adam McKay (“Taladega Nights”, “Anchorman”)

Who’s in it? Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Mary Steenburgen, Richard Jenkins

What’s it about? Two middle aged “boys” are forced to live under one roof when their parents get married.

Why should you see it? The trailer is really funny and Reilly and Ferrell make a good comedy team, particularly when directed by McKay.

Why should you avoid it? Ferrell hasn’t been funny lately.

AUGUST

August 1

THE MUMMY: TOMB OF THE DRAGON EMPEROR

Who directed it? Rob Cohen (taking over for Stephen Sommers)

Who’s in it? Brendan Fraser, Jet Li, Maria Bello (taking over for Rachel Weisz), John Hannah, Luke Ford

What’s it about? Apparently ancient China had mummies too. Who knew?

Why should you see it? The previous Mummy films were kinda fun.

Why should you avoid it? The previous Mummy films were only kinda fun.

August 8

PINEAPPLE EXPRESS

Who directed it? David Gordon Green (Yeah, that guy who made heavy dramas such as “George Washington”, “Undertow”, and recently “Snow Angels”)

What’s it about? Two stoners witness a murder and have to go on the run.

Why should you see it? The trailer is undeniably funny and Seth Rogen is riding a hot streak. Plus a stoner action movie is long overdue (no, every Keanu Reeves action film does not count).

Why should you avoid it? Getting stoned doesn’t make one want to run around much. unless it’s out for munchies. I’m just guessing, I only got stoned once in college.

August 15

TROPIC THUNDER

Who directed it? Ben Stiller

Who’s in it? Ben Stiller, Robert Downey, Jr., Jack Black, Nick Nolte, Bill Hader, Jay Baruchel, Brandon T. Jackson, Steve Coogan

What’s it about? A bunch of pretentious actors filming a Platoon-like war movie are dumped in the middle of a very real war in Asia. Robert Downey, Jr. plays an Australian method actor who undergoes a surgical procedure to play a black sergeant.

Why should you see it? I’m guessing for Robert Downey, Jr. I like Ben Stiller but I’m not a big fan of his wacky comedies.

Why should you avoid it? End of the summer blues maybe? I hope people don’t avoid this film because of Downey, Jr. donning black face. I like to believe modern audiences aren’t that dumb.

Top 5 movies I’m looking forward to this summer (minus Iron Man as I’ve already seen it):

1. The Dark Knight
2. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
3. Pineapple Express
4. WALL-E
5. X-Files: I Want To Believe

Well there you have it, I’ve laid out your entire summer for you. Try and mix in some sun here and there, I don’t want to see a lot of pale people in the theatres come August.

–Brett Deacon admits he loves summer movies mostly because theaters have air conditioning. And popcorn.

Let’s Not Forget Men Get Broken Hearts, Too

I saw “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” over the weekend. It’s an earnest and honest comedy about a modern schlub’s efforts to get over the end of a relationship with a woman way out of his league. Jason Segel (bit player in Judd Apatow’s “Freaks and Geeks” and “Undeclared” along with “Knocked Up”) plays Peter Bretter (you know like “Brett” only bretter), a musician who writes moody television scores for crime dramas but mostly he goofs around the house waiting for his girlfriend, actress Sarah Marshall (the star of said crime drama) to come home and wonder why she was ever with him in the first place. And then one day she comes home and breaks up with him. After a few tries and trying to sleep with other women to get her out of his mind (a hysterical sequence and one that many guys will relate to) Pete decides to escape to Hawaii in order to forget Sarah only to realize that she’s vacationing at the same resort with her new vapid boyfriend.

Richard Roeper of the Chicago Sun-Times (and “Ebert and Roeper”) proclaims the movie to be one of the funniest comedies of all time. I can’t go nearly that far, it’s a bit too predictable and flawed. But I do appreciate it’s brutal honesty. Segal isn’t afraid to bare all (quite literally in one early scene featuring dudity) as his character’s heart is shredded to pieces and he tries to put it back together again. Mila Kunis is enjoyable as his new love interest, but the couple lack some real chemistry together. Jonah Hill and Paul Rudd show up as mainland transplants but are mostly wasted with few memorable jokes. Bill Hader, on the other hand, steals just about every scene he’s in. It’s a funny movie, but not gut-bustingly funny.

The movie got me thinking, the romantic comedy is a genre that is generally thought of as the woman’s genre. Men have action movies, sci-fi movies, mob movies, westerns, and the occasional stupid fart and drinking comedies, but women have laid their claim to the romantic comedy. But wait just a second ladies, us men have our romantic comedies, too. And in them we can be just as neurotic in our efforts to understand you (most often wondering why we have such a difficult time getting you into bed) as you seem to be in most traditional romantic comedies. So therefore, I submit to you loyal readers (and you must be loyal as I haven’t blogged in almost 2 months ““ um, sorry about that), a list of 5 films that are among my favorite entries into the romantic comedy genre.

The Sure Thing ““ One of my top 10 favorite movies of all time. John Cusack plays Walter “Gib” Gibson, a free spirit, closet intellectual at wool sweater northeastern college who spends most of his time dodging homework, eating pie in the hallway while his chubby roommate scores one coed after another, and trying desperately to hit on as many women as possible. Enter Allison: a repressed (re-PREHHHHH-ssed), sheltered, spoiled girl who drives Gib crazy on a cross country trip to California. This is a true love story about two opposites attracting. It’s a film that reminds us that love isn’t always at first sight and can be found in the most unlikely of people.

The 40 Year Old Virgin ““ The movie that created the Judd Apatow brand (and ultimately brought us “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”) still stands apart as the most heartfelt. It’s a movie about a man who just never got it off with a woman (or anyone for that matter). What’s great about this film is that it acknowledges that for most of us goofballs, dating is extremely difficult and it’s rather easy to believe that someone in their younger years might just simply give up on trying all together. But it also reminds us that anything worth having doesn’t come easy. And it’s never too late to try, especially when you meet someone really worthwhile.

High Fidelity ““ John Cusack is Rob Gordon, a mid-30’s, self-proclaimed pop culture “professional appreciator” who recounts the top 5 break-ups in his life all the while trying to reconcile what went wrong in his current relationship. What I like about this film is that it acknowledges that men obsess over relationships, trying to understand why some work and others do not.

She’s Having A Baby ““ A film sandwiched (and often forgotten) among John Hughes’ legendary mid 1980’s run of comedies that ran from “Sixteen Candles” to “Planes, Trains, and Automobiles”. Kevin Bacon is Jefferson Edward Briggs (or “Jake” for brevity), a writer with dreams of writing the great American novel but gets pulled into the American Dream (wife, mortgage, and child) Christie (played by the adorable Elizabeth McGovern). Alec Baldwin is his alpha-male slimeball best friend (squint and you’ll think it’s actually William Baldwin). This film is great at reminding us Neanderthals that there is beauty in the domestic concepts of building a marriage and family and that our dreams can co-exist within those relationships.

Notting Hill ““ Richard Curits is one of my favorite screenwriters and he penned this clever tale about an ordinary travel bookshop owner (Hugh Grant) who has a chance encounter with a famous American movie star (Julia Roberts, in a real stretch of a role) that leads to an unlikely romance. Some may see it as a parable of the famous mingling with the unfamous, but I see it as a film about a man dating way above his “level”, that is to say dealing with breaking with silly traditions and dating someone more beautiful, more wealthy, more interesting, and seemingly having more to offer in every way. Except their relationship works because on a fundamental level, do any of those things really matter?

Women drive us wild. We spend our lives trying to understand them and it’s a difficult road. But it’s a great ride. And films that deal with our frustations in this endeavor can be really funny and touching.

That’s about it for this week. Check out those films listed above if you haven’t already. Next week I’ll be back (yes, I promise) with a preview of the Summer Movie Season along with an early review of one this summer’s most anticipated films.

–Brett Deacon thinks an all-girl action movie would kick some major ass. Especially if they were all mobsters and it took place in the Old West. And if it had aliens. He’s not asking for much, get crackin’ Hollywood!

Well it’s Oscar night”¦ again. In past websites and incarnations of my bull I’ve done a recap of the show after the fact but this year I thought maybe I’d try something new, a “live” recap blog. Yes, I’ll do my best to articulate my thoughts as they come to me. This will likely be boring as all get out, but you knew that was a possibility when you started reading something written by me, right? It’s on YOU!

5:27 PM PT ““ The pre-show is just ending and America’s new favorite old fart Regis (sorry Andy Rooney) is in the front row pointing out celebrities he recognizes including “Xavier” Bardem seated right next to Jack Nicholson. Jack has courtside seats to Lakers games and the Oscars every year it seems. Also of note, I missed all the fashion reporting. YAY ME!

5:30 PM PT ““ And the show begins”¦ with about the oddest opening I’ve seen yet. What appears to be a UPS trucks races through “Hollywood” dodging a variety of “classic” characters. Um”¦ huh?

5:32 PM PT ““ Jon Stewart emerges from a tube. “Tonight, welcome to the makeup sex!”

5:34 PM PT- Stewart is really in his element. Referring to the number of bleak characters and films nominated this year: “Does this town need a hug?” “All I can say is thank God for teen pregnancy.”

5:41 PM PT ““ Jennifer Garner strolls out to present the first award of the night: Best Costume Design. My pick: La Vie En Rose. The winner: Elizabeth ““ The Golden Age. 0 for 1. Crap. I mean, yay for the women in the funky glasses who gave a 3 second acceptance speech. That was classy.

5:47 PM PT ““ George Clooney is so cool he doesn’t ever need ice cubes in his drinks. Okay that was dumb, but now he’s on stage to present a 80 years of Oscar retrospective montage. Retrospective pieces like this are usually my favorite part of the show but I gotta say, this one sucks. It’s an absolute mess. I mean editing it to “My Heart Will Go On?” C’mon. Some nice moments but really not well thought out.

5:51 PM PT ““ Anne Hathaway (hubba) and Steve Carrell (stars of the upcoming Get Smart movie, hence the theme music) arrive to present the award for Best Animated Feature. My Pick: Ratatouille. Winner: Ratatouille. HA! 1 for 2. Brad Bird really does look a bit like a bird. Nice acceptance speech though.

5:56 PM PT ““ Katherine Heigl (hubba) is out to”¦ I’m sorry lost my concentration”¦ Where was I? Oh right, she’s there to present the award for Best Makeup. My Pick: La Vie En Rose. Winner: La Vie En Rose. Don’t call it a come back, I’ve been here for 30 minutes. I’m now 2 for 3. Wait! Why did Katherine have to leave the frame?! Come back!

5:59 PM PT ““ “Happy Working Song” song by Amy Adams. I love Amy Adams, but I’ll never understand having musical and dance numbers at the Oscars. Why is she on stage all by herself?

6:06 PM PT ““ Stewart: “Welcome back to the 80th Academy Awards. In case you’re wondering what we all do here during the commercial break, mostly we just sit around making catty remarks about the outfits you’re all wearing at home.”

6:07 PM PT ““ Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson presents for Best Visual Effects. My pick: Transformers. Winner: The Golden Compass. 2 for 4. First time winners, interesting. One of the winners reads a quote from Walt Disney: “It’s kinda fun to do the impossible.” Indeed.

6:10 PM PT ““ Cate Blanchett arrives to present the award for Achievement in Art Direction. My pick: Sweeney Todd. Winner: Sweeney Todd. 3 for 5. Okay, I’m back over 50%, there’s hope for me yet.

6:13 PM PT ““ A retrospective montage on the Best Supporting Actor award.

6:15 PM PT ““ Jennifer Hudson comes out to present the award for Best Supporting Actor (didn’t see that one coming). Really strong field this year. My pick: Javier Bardem for No Country for Old Men. Winner: Javier Bardem. 4 for 6! No big surprise, Javier was the odds on favorite. Classy acceptance speech. Right about now Regis is going, “Javier?! What’d I say?”

6:23 PM PT ““ Oscar’s salute to binoculars and periscopes. Kinda funny, kinda stupid. “Bad Dreams: An Oscar Salute.” Funnier.

6:24 PM PT ““ Keri Russell (who was fantastic in “Waitress”) introduces the nominee for Best Original Song, “Raise It Up” from August Rush in which she starred.

6:28 PM PT ““ Owen Wilson arrives to present the award for Best Live Action Short Film. My pick: The Tonto Woman. Winner: Le Mozart Des Pickpockets. 4 for 7. I had no shot really, that clip from The Tonto Woman looked terrible.

6:31 PM PT ““ Jerry Seinfeld’s bee from Bee Movie (a film that was not nominated) presents a short clip on bees in cinema. Kinda cute, kinda stupid. The bee also presents the award for Best Animated Short Film. My pick: Peter & The Wolf. I’m in real trouble here. Winner: Peter & The Wolf. HA! 5 for 8. Totally pulled that one out of my ass.

6:34 PM PT ““ A retrospective on Best Supporting Actress. Now, these are retrospectives are on the winners receiving the award and no footage of the performances that won them the award. I guess this year it’s all about remembering the award and not the work.

6:35 PM PT- Alan Arkin comes out to present the award. My pick: Cate Blanchett for I’m Not There. Winner: Tilda Swinton for Michael Clayton. Wow, first surprise of the night? She was great in Michael Clayton. Of course, now I’m 5 for 9. This is payback for Peter & The Wolf.

6:40 PM PT ““ Sidney Poitier reflects on the experience of winning an Academy Award. Now that was kinda cool. Not amazing, but at least somewhat interesting. So far these retrospectives are really terrible. I’m not impressed by any of them.

6:44 PM PT ““ Pregnant Jessica Alba comes out to talk about the Nerd Oscars (I mean the Scientific and Technical Awards). I wish they would televise those awards.

6:45 PM PT ““ Josh Brolin and James McAvoy present the award for Best Adapted Screenplay. Seems a bit of a conflict of to have Brolin up there given that No Country For Old Men is nominated. Brolin and Nicholson joke about Brolin’s terrible Nicholson impression. When in trouble, bounce a joke off of Jack. I suppose that’s really why he sits in the front row. On to the award. My Pick: No Country For Old Men. Winner: No Country For Old Men. 6 for 10. Back in the saddle again”¦

6:50 PM PT ““ Finally! Something interesting! A short, behind the scenes piece about the nomination and award process. This is actually kinda funny and informative! And Michael Bay’s only chance of getting on the show!

6:52 PM PT ““ Miley Cyrus comes out to introduce the 3rd nominated song, “That’s How You Know” from Enchanted. Bathroom break time!

7:00 PM PT ““ “And the baby goes to”¦” Jon Stewart is on fire.

7:01 PM PT ““ Dame Judi Densch and Halle Berry ““ oh wait it’s actually Jonah Hill and Seth Rogen riffing on who’s gives off a more Halle Berry vibe. Funny. The award is for Best Sound Editing. My Pick: Ratatouille. Winner: The Bourne Ultimatum. 6 for 11. I really suck at this. I mean I’m amazingly bad. It’s only dumb luck I got 6 right. My two year old niece could do a better job of picking winners than me at this point.

7:05 PM PT ““ Rogen and Hill back at it again. The award is Achievement in Sound Mixing. My pick: Transformers. Winner: The Bourne Ultimatum. 6 for 12. Man, it’s like Jason Bourne came into my living room and kicked me in the balls.

7:08 PM PT ““ Best Actress winners montage. Guess what’s coming next!!!

7:09 PM PT ““ Forrest Whitaker presents the award for Best Actress. My pick: Ellen Page for Juno. I’m sorry Ellen, at the rate I’m going, it’s not looking good for you. Winner: Marion Cotillard for La Vie En Rose. Come here Ellen, let me console you (she doesn’t look that upset, actually). I’m now 6 for 13, including missing the past 3 winners.

7:18 PM PT ““ Back from commercials and Jon Stewart playing Wii on the big screen. Hysterical. Colin Farrell comes out to introduce the 4th nominated song, “Falling Slowly” from Once (this was my pick, by the way. So it clearly hasn’t a snowball’s chance in hell.) This is a beautiful song, I’m off to iTunes.

7:22 PM PT ““ Jack Nicholson earns his seat by presenting a retrospective on the Best Picture winners. Wow, I can’t believe they ran through them all. This might be the best montage of the night. Is it just me or do the winners from the last 10 years or so been less than memorable?

7:28 PM PT ““ Renee Zellweger presents the award for Best Editing. My pick (sigh): No Country For Old Men. Winner: The Bourne Ultimatum (third win). I’m an embarrassing 6 for 14.

7:31 PM PT ““ Nicole Kidman presents an honorary award to legendary production designer Robert Boyle (who is 98!!!). He was 18 when the Oscars started. This guy has done some amazing work. While I’m quite familiar with the films he’s worked on, I’m embarrassed to say I had no idea it was him.

7:35 PM PT ““ Sharp as a tack, Robert Boyle comes out to a standing ovation: “That’s the great part about getting old. I don’t recommend the other part.” Ha! This is my favorite moment of the night.

7:42 PM PT ““ Penelope Cruz presents the award for Best Foreign Language Film. My pick (and sure loser): The Counterfeiters. Winner: The Counterfeiters. Well okay I’m now 7 for 15 but that’s a pick I stole from Entertainment Weekly. I mean I’ll take it but I’m not proud of it.

7:44 PM PT ““ Patrick Dempsey introduces the 5th nominated song, “So Close” from Enchanted. Another bathroom break!

7:48 PM PT ““ John Travolta hams his way on to the stage so he can present the winner for Best Original Song. My Pick: “Falling Slowly” from Once. Winner: “Falling Slowly”. Fantastic. 8 for 16 and I’m back at .500. It’s a beautiful song (update from iTunes, it’s not available by itself, you have to spend $10 for the whole album”¦ which is probably a good idea). The orchestra plays before Market Irglova can give her thanks.

7:56 PM PT ““ After the break, Jon Stewart brings Marketa Irglova back on stage to say her thank yous, which she didn’t get to do before due to time constraints. Wow, classy moment and an awards first. And she fucking NAILS it.

7:58 PM PT ““ “Our next presenter is talented and beautiful. Apparently that’s what it takes to get ahead in this town”. Cameron Diaz presents the award for Best Cinematography. Will my streak continue?! My pick: Robert Elswitt for There Will Be Blood. Winner Robert Elswitt for There Will Be Blood. Someone must’ve cued the rally monkey! I’ve snagged the last 3 and stand at 9 for 17.

8:01 PM PT ““ Hillary Swank introduces the In Memoriam montage. This year they added the dates (February 1st 2007 to January 31st 2008). The house remains dark and silent as ABC cuts to a goofy GMC commercial.

8:08 PM PT ““ Amy Adams presents the award for Best Original Score. My pick: Dario Marianelli for Atonement. Winner: Dario Marianelli for Atonement. I am, dare I say, en fuego. 4 in a row and now standing at 10 for 18.

8:11 PM PT ““ Tom Hanks introduces six soldiers live from Baghdad who present the award for Best Documentary (Short Subject). My pick: Salim Baba. Winner: Freeheld. I got cocky and fate struck me down. Now 10 for 19.

8:15 PM PT ““ Tom Hanks presents the award for Best Documentary Feature. My pick: No End In Sight. Winner: Taxi to the Dark Side. I’m shocked (and now 10 for 20). I’m really surprised by this as No End in Sight was an amazing film (forget documentary) and Taxi To The Dark Side is a goofy title. But admittedly I’ve never seen and now I’ll have to check it out.

8:19 PM PT – Only four awards left as the show approaches the 3 hour mark. You know the real reason the awards show is often so long? The 5 minute commercial breaks.

8:23 PM PT ““ (4 minutes later!) Harrison Ford arrives to present the award for Best Original Screenplay. My Pick: Diablo Cody for Juno. Winner: Diablo Cody. 11 for 21. (be humble, be humble, be humble). Diablo Cody gives a very touching acceptance speech.

8:26 PM PT – ANOTHER COMMERCIAL! 4 minutes of commercial. 3 minutes of show.

8:29 PM PT ““ Montage of Best Actor award presentations. Let me guess what’s comin’ up”¦

8:30 PM PT ““ The always classy Helen Mirren presents the award for Best Actor. My pick (and virtually everyone else’s): Daniel Day-Lewis for There Will Be Blood. Winner: Daniel Day-Lewis. Day-Lewis bows before Helen Mirren. For those still keeping score, I’m at 12 for 22.

8:40 PM PT ““ Montage of Best Director award presentations.

8:42 PM PT ““ The great Martin Scorsese presents the award for Best Director. My pick: Joel & Ethan Coen for No Country For Old Men. Winner: Joel & Ethan Coen. 13 for 23.

8:44 PM PT ““ Denzel Washington presents the 80th award for Best Picture. My pick: No Country For Old Men. Winner: No Country For Old Men. I finish the night 14 for 24. Terrible.

Well that about wraps it up. I thought Jon Stewart did a phenomenal job as host but many of the montages and additional pieces seemed rushed, whether that be because of the limited time frame provided by the writer’s strike or poor production overall I don’t know.

Thanks again for reading my bull.

–Brett Deacon was voted least likely to win an Academy Award in high school, but was in fact voted most likely to write an Oscar blog, a good 10 years before anyone knew what a blog was

A bit of a disclaimer: If you use this list to cheat on your office pool and then lose, don’t blame me. I don’t need that kind of pressure. These are my best educated guesses. I haven’t seen every film nominated this year, though I have seen all five best picture nominees. And like a hypocrite, I will also be cheating (but at least referencing my source). So if you do use my picks you are hereby required to pay me a royalty (as for the sources I copied off of, let me deal with that).

And on with the picks (my picks in italics):

Best animated feature film

• “Persepolis” – Marjane Satrapi and Vincent Paronnaud
• * “Ratatouille” – Brad Bird
• “Surf’s Up” – Ash Brannon and Chris Buck

Comments: Why is “Surf’s Up” nominated? How did that one sneak past the goalkeeper? Anyway, Ratatouille is the easy pick here being the most popular of the films (though don’t be too surprised if “Persepolis” pulls off an upset).

Achievement in Art Direction

• “American Gangster” – Art Direction: Arthur Max; Set Decoration: Beth A. Rubino
• “Atonement” – Art Direction: Sarah Greenwood; Set Decoration: Katie Spencer
• “The Golden Compass” – Art Direction: Dennis Gassner; Set Decoration: Anna Pinnock
• * “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street” – Art Direction: Dante Ferretti; Set Decoration: Francesca Lo Schiavo
• “There Will Be Blood” – Art Direction: Jack Fisk; Set Decoration: Jim Erickson

Comments: “Sweeney Todd” has to win somewhere and this is its best shot.

Achievement in Costume Design

• “Across the Universe” – Albert Wolsky
• “Atonement” – Jacqueline Durran
• “Elizabeth: The Golden Age” – Alexandra Byrne
• * “La Vie en Rose” – Marit Allen
• “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street” – Colleen Atwood

Comments: Tough category as all films are period pieces (period films often being a shoo-in for this award). Still, never forget that the overall quality of the film can overshadow the contributions of any individual area and that applies here. I’m going with “La Vie en Rose”.

Best Documentary Feature

• * “No End in Sight” – Charles Ferguson and Audrey Marrs
• “Operation Homecoming: Writing the Wartime Experience” – Richard E. Robbins
• “Sicko” – Michael Moore and Meghan O’Hara
• “Taxi to the Dark Side” – Alex Gibney and Eva Orner
• “War/Dance” – Andrea Nix Fine and Sean Fine

Comments: Do you remember when “Hoop Dreams” wasn’t nominated for best documentary deature 14 years ago (and judging by the looks on your faces you probably don’t)? Everyone went apeshit like it was a national tragedy and the Academy reworked its nomination process for this category. Well, there’s another glaring omission this year. There are four films here about the war in Iraq and one film about our ridiculous healthcare system. All relevant issues but none of them were as thrilling as “In The Shadow of The Moon” (a film I talked about in last week’s blog). Still, “No End In Sight” was a refreshingly bipartisan take on the war in Iraq and should be the clear winner.

Best Documentary (Short subject)

• “Freeheld” A Lieutenant Films Production: Cynthia Wade and Vanessa Roth
• “La Corona (The Crown)” A Runaway Films and Vega Films Production: Amanda Micheli and Isabel Vega
• * “Salim Baba” A Ropa Vieja Films and Paradox Smoke Production: Tim Sternberg and Francisco Bello
• “Sari’s Mother” (Cinema Guild) A Daylight Factory Production: James Longley

Comments: Haven’t seen any of these. Entertainment Weekly says “Freeheld” and “Sari’s Mother” are strong contenders. Coin flipping “¦ tails! “Salim Baba” is my pick.

Best Foreign Language Film of the Year

• “Beaufort” Israel
• * “The Counterfeiters” Austria
• “Katyn” Poland
• “Mongol” Kazakhstan
• “12” Russia

Comments: This is where I cheat. I haven’t seen any of these films. Entertainment Weekly says “The Counterfeiters” is a shoo-in. I’m sold.

Achievement in Makeup

• * “La Vie en Rose” – Didier Lavergne and Jan Archibald
• “Norbit” – Rick Baker and Kazuhiro Tsuji
• “Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End” – Ve Neill and Martin Samuel

Comments: Here’s where you go with the best reviewed film. I don’t think Academy voters can in good conscience make “Norbit” an Academy Award-winning film no matter how good Rick Baker is.

Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures (Original Score)

• *”Atonement” – Dario Marianelli
• “The Kite Runner” – Alberto Iglesias
• “Michael Clayton” – James Newton Howard
• “Ratatouille” – Michael Giacchino
• “3:10 to Yuma” – Marco Beltrami

Comments: Johnny Greenwood’s haunting score for “There Will Be Blood” should’ve been nominated (and would far and away be my choice). But it wasn’t, so my pick is “Atonement” as the score was one of the few memorable things about that movie.

Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures (Original Song)

• * “Falling Slowly” from “Once” – Music and Lyric by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova
• “Happy Working Song” from “Enchanted” – Music by Alan Menken; Lyric by Stephen Schwartz
• “Raise It Up” from “August Rush” – Music and Lyric by Jamal Joseph, Charles Mack and Tevin Thomas
• “So Close” from “Enchanted” – Music by Alan Menken; Lyric by Stephen Schwartz
• “That’s How You Know” from “Enchanted” – Music by Alan Menken; Lyric by Stephen Schwartz

Comments: I haven’t seen “Once” or “Enchanted” but I’m going to play the “split-the-vote” card (the belief that 3 nominations from one film will cancel each other out) and pick “Falling Slowly” from “Once” to win.

Best Animated Short Film

• “I Met the Walrus” A Kids & Explosions Production: Josh Raskin
• “Madame Tutli-Putli” (National Film Board of Canada) A National Film Board of Canada Production Chris Lavis and Maciek Szczerbowski
• “Même les Pigeons Vont au Paradis (Even Pigeons Go to Heaven)” (Premium Films) A BUF Compagnie Production Samuel Tourneux and Simon Vanesse
• “My Love (Moya Lyubov)” (Channel One Russia) A Dago-Film Studio, Channel One Russia and Dentsu Tec Production Alexander Petrov
• * “Peter & the Wolf” (BreakThru Films) A BreakThru Films/Se-ma-for Studios Production Suzie Templeton and Hugh Welchman

Comments: I haven’t seen any of these films, but I know the story of Peter & The Wolf so that’s my pick.

Best Live Action Short Film

• “At Night” A Zentropa Entertainments 10 Production: Christian E. Christiansen and Louise Vesth
• “Il Supplente (The Substitute)” (Sky Cinema Italia) A Frame by Frame Italia Production: Andrea Jublin
• “Le Mozart des Pickpockets (The Mozart of Pickpockets)” (Premium Films) A Karé Production: Philippe Pollet-Villard
• “Tanghi Argentini” (Premium Films) An Another Dimension of an Idea Production: Guido Thys and Anja Daelemans
• *”The Tonto Woman” A Knucklehead, Little Mo and Rose Hackney Barber Production: Daniel Barber and Matthew Brown

Comments: I like the title “The Tonto Woman”. No idea what it means. I’ll pick it (this is how people lose at the track)

Achievement in Sound Editing

• “The Bourne Ultimatum” – Karen Baker Landers and Per Hallberg
• “No Country for Old Men” – Skip Lievsay
• *”Ratatouille” – Randy Thom and Michael Silvers
• “There Will Be Blood” – Christopher Scarabosio and Matthew Wood
• “Transformers” – Ethan Van der Ryn and Mike Hopkins

Comments: I always say that there’s nothing more difficult than creating sound for an animated film because all sounds have to be imagined and created. I’m going with “Ratatouille”.

Achievement in Sound Mixing

• “The Bourne Ultimatum” – Scott Millan, David Parker and Kirk Francis
• “No Country for Old Men” – Skip Lievsay, Craig Berkey, Greg Orloff and Peter Kurland
• “Ratatouille” – Randy Thom, Michael Semanick and Doc Kane
• “3:10 to Yuma” – Paul Massey, David Giammarco and Jim Stuebe
• * “Transformers” – Kevin O’Connell, Greg P. Russell and Peter J. Devlin

Comments: Kevin O’Connell has been nominated 20 times and has never won. He is the Susan Lucci of this category. It’s his time.

Achievement in Visual Effects

• “The Golden Compass” – Michael Fink, Bill Westenhofer, Ben Morris and Trevor Wood
• “Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End” – John Knoll, Hal Hickel, Charles Gibson and John Frazier
• * “Transformers” – Scott Farrar, Scott Benza, Russell Earl and John Frazier

Comments: You can’t say many good things about “Transformers”, but one thing you can say is that the special effects were indeed amazing. Bit of useless trivia: Nominee and ILM wonderboy John Knoll co-created Photoshop.

Achievement in Film Editing

• “The Bourne Ultimatum” – Christopher Rouse
• “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly” – Juliette Welfling
• “Into the Wild” – Jay Cassidy
• * “No Country for Old Men” – Roderick Jaynes
• “There Will Be Blood” – Dylan Tichenor

Comments: I’m going with Roderick Jaynes and I hope he makes an appearance. (There is no Roderick Jaynes, he is a figment of the Coen Brothers’ imagination.)

Achievement in Cinematography

• “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford” – Roger Deakins
• “Atonement” – Seamus McGarvey
• “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly” – Janusz Kaminski
• “No Country for Old Men” – Roger Deakins
• *”There Will Be Blood” – Robert Elswit

Comments: Tough choices here. I’ve heard there’s a lot of sentiment for Janusz Kaminski’s work on “The Diving Bell and The Butterfly”. “Atonement” has that one amazing five-minute tracking shot going for it, so that’s a possibility. And then you have Roger Deakins nominated twice. All that considered, I’m going to go with Robert Elswit’s work on “There Will Be Blood”.

Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role

• * Cate Blanchett in “I’m Not There”
• Ruby Dee in “American Gangster”
• Saoirse Ronan in “Atonement”
• Amy Ryan in “Gone Baby Gone”
• Tilda Swinton in “Michael Clayton”

Comments: Wide open field. Ruby Dee has never won and could be a legacy pick. Cate Blanchett and Amy Ryan gave stand-out performances in films that weren’t otherwise nominated. I’m going with Blanchett based on popularity, though I think Amy Ryan is probably more deserving.

Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role

• Casey Affleck in “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford”
• * Javier Bardem in “No Country for Old Men”
• Philip Seymour Hoffman in “Charlie Wilson’s War”
• Hal Holbrook in “Into the Wild”
• Tom Wilkinson in “Michael Clayton”

Comments: Second easiest pick of the night, Javier Bardem’s hitman character Anton is a performance for the ages. The only other performance that can match him is Daniel Day-Lewis’s, and he’s in another category.

Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role

• Cate Blanchett in “Elizabeth: The Golden Age”
• Julie Christie in “Away from Her”
• Marion Cotillard in “La Vie en Rose”
• Laura Linney in “The Savages”
• * Ellen Page in “Juno”

Comments: Tough call. I’m going with Ellen Page because she really carries that film. Plus, I think Julie Christie and Marion Cotillard could steal votes from each other.

Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role

• George Clooney in “Michael Clayton”
• * Daniel Day-Lewis in “There Will Be Blood”
• Johnny Depp in “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street”
• Tommy Lee Jones in “In the Valley of Elah”
• Viggo Mortensen in “Eastern Promises”

Comments: Easiest pick of the night. Daniel Day-Lewis’s performance drinks every other performance’s milkshake.

Adapted Screenplay

• “Atonement”, Screenplay by Christopher Hampton
• “Away from Her”, Written by Sarah Polley
• “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly”, Screenplay by Ronald Harwood
• * “No Country for Old Men”, Written for the screen by Joel Coen & Ethan Coen
• “There Will Be Blood”, Written for the screen by Paul Thomas Anderson

Comments: I really want to think Sarah Polley can win this, but in the end, it’ll probably be “No Country For Old Men”.

Original Screenplay

• * “Juno”, Written by Diablo Cody
• “Lars and the Real Girl”, Written by Nancy Oliver
• “Michael Clayton”, Written by Tony Gilroy
• “Ratatouille”, Screenplay by Brad Bird; Story by Jan Pinkava, Jim Capobianco, Brad Bird
• “The Savages”, Written by Tamara Jenkins

Comments: It’s Diablo Cody’s moment.

Achievement in Directing

• “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly”, Julian Schnabel
• “Juno”, Jason Reitman
• “Michael Clayton”, Tony Gilroy
• * “No Country for Old Men”, Joel Coen and Ethan Coen
• “There Will Be Blood”, Paul Thomas Anderson

Comments: I really want to think that Jason Reitman and Paul Thomas Anderson have a shot here, but “Juno” is probably a bit too cute and “There Will Be Blood” is probably a bit too long.

Best Motion Picture of the Year

• “Atonement” (Focus Features) A Working Title Production: Tim Bevan, Eric Fellner and Paul Webster, Producers
• “Juno” (A Mandate Pictures/Mr. Mudd Production) A Mandate Pictures/Mr. Mudd Production: Lianne Halfon, Mason Novick and Russell Smith, Producers
• “Michael Clayton” (Warner Bros.) A Clayton Productions, LLC Production: Sydney Pollack, Jennifer Fox and Kerry Orent, Producers
• *”No Country for Old Men” (Miramax and Paramount Vantage) A Scott Rudin/Mike Zoss Production: Scott Rudin, Ethan Coen and Joel Coen, Producers
• “There Will Be Blood” (Paramount Vantage and Miramax) A JoAnne Sellar/Ghoulardi Film Company Production: JoAnne Sellar, Paul Thomas Anderson and Daniel Lupi, Producers

Comments: Two months ago I would’ve said that “No Country For Old Men” was a shoo-in. But lately I think that “There Will Be Blood” with its more epic scope and likability of “Juno” are going to give it a run for its money. And “Michael Clayton” was very well received criticially. However, I don’t think anything can stop “No Country For Old Men” from walking away with the night’s top prize.

And those are my picks. I’ll be keeping a running blog of the night while I sit in my jammies, munching on popcorn and chocolate-covered pretzels (you know, basically living the dream), and watching the festivities. Check back Monday!

–Brett Deacon, clearly, has no life.

Part III

Sorry for the delay. Um, my dog ate my blog.

Where I have been? I’ve been at the movies, naturally. I caught a screening of “National Treasure: Book of Secrets”, the sequel to “National Treasure” (in case you were not aware). Nicolas Cage is back as Benjamin Franklin Gates, along with his nerdy sidekick Riley Poole, on a mission to clear the Gates family name (an ancestor has been implicated in the Lincoln assassination “¦ an investigation one would’ve thought had been long over) and in the process finds the lost City of Gold. Yes, that’s a lot. Too much, you might ask? You would be asking the right question.

The key to finding the lost City of Gold (and clearing the family name – never forget that) is the President’s Book of Secrets, which as legend has it contains every secret our nation has and is for the President’s eyes only. Much like the first film Gates and company rely on a ridiculous amount of historical knowledge and even more ridiculous technology to fumble through the somewhat corny plot. The movie tries to do everything the first one did, only it comes off as stale and predictable (which the first one really wasn’t).

Of course there’s a lot of winking to the previous film. For example, at the end of “National Treaure” Riley drives off in a Ferrari, which was a throwaway joke at best. In the sequel, it’s a full-blown running gag.

Sequels are a great idea on paper. Who doesn’t want to see our heroes in more adventures? Studios like sequels because they feature built-in audiences and mark the beginning of possibly lucrative franchises. But they’re a tricky game. Every film ever made should at least be fresh, and sequels will always be compared to the previous film. Sequels almost always follow a very popular film so expectations are high. Naturally it may seem smart to just take what worked in the first film and do that again, sometimes doing exactly that again which is, in my opinion, the worst thing a sequel can do. The two Back to the Future sequels did this ad nauseum, much to their detriment. Better to let the characters grow naturally in a new story than be anchored by the last one. Of course, that doesn’t always work either. Neither Indiana Jones film is as great as Raiders of The Lost Ark and even The Godfather Part II (which some consider the best sequel ever) isn’t quite as good as the originator. But at least those are good films that stand on their own. Nodding to previous films is so lame and tired. We’ve seen that movie, show us something new.

Indiana Jones Trailer

Speaking of sequels, John McClane and John Rambo have made comebacks so why not Indiana Jones, right? In Hollywood, everything old is new again I suppose so why not dust off the ol’ fedora and trot out Henry Jones Jr for another run at fortune and glory? I’m an Indiana Jones freak and “Raiders of the Lost Ark” is one of my favorite films of all time so naturally when I heard there would be a fourth Indiana Jones movie I thought, “Harrison Ford is 65 years old but so what? It’s god damn Indiana Jones!” And then I saw the trailer and I started to get worried.

Much like the James Bond series, the Indiana Jones movies were great at transporting us to exotic locales as Indiana puts his fear of snakes aside in the interest of bare-knuckled archeology. And then we get this trailer where there’s an exciting car chase “¦ in a warehouse. Yes, I realize it very well may be the warehouse which was the final resting place of the Ark of the Covenant, but so what? Yes, there are teases of an ancient temple in a jungle (and some bad green-screen work of a car chase in said jungle). And some of the humor is still there (though a lot of it seems to be of the aforementioned “wink wink, remember the old films?” variety), so it didn’t get me excited as I had hoped it would.

After last summer’s horrible run of sequels (admitted obvious exception: Bruce Willis bringing John McClane back strong in “Live Free or Die Hard”), my pessimism is at an all-time high. And I have to be honest, the teaser for “Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull” did not get me jonesing.

Fool’s Gold

Here’s a movie that I hope never gets a sequel. Matthew McConaughey plays Finn, a fun-loving underwater treasure hunter who has severe problems with both responsibility and keeping his shirt on. He’s recently divorced from Tess (played by the very cute Kate Hudson), who left him most likely because of his problem with responsibility and not because he couldn’t seem to keep his shirt on. Finn enlists the help of billionaire Nigel Honeycutt and his nails-on-a-chalkboard-annoying spoiled brat daughter Gemma to fund a hunt for the Queen’s Dowry, a legendary treasure lost over 300 years ago. Unfortunately, said treasure is trapped off the coast of an island owned by a rap mogul named (and I’m not making this up) Bigg Bunny. Despite owning his own Bahamian island, Bigg Bunny can’t seem to let the thug lifestyle so he becomes the defacto heavy, refusing to let someone pull treasure off the coast of his island.

This is a really dopey movie that suffers from what I consider the “filmmaking vacation” syndrome. See, sometimes when movies go to vacation-friendly destinations like the Bahamas (as is the case here), it looks like everyone had a great time making the film but never put a whole lot into actually making a good film. The Farrelly Brothers’ remake of “The Heartbreak Kid” from last year suffers from the same problem. The obvious side effect is you wish you were at these locations, just not with these characters (and certainly not in the movie theater you’re stuck in).

“You left your shirt WHERE?”

I like all the actors from this movie. I just don’t like them IN this movie. And Donald Sutherland looks regretful that he’s even in the movie, with a “they told me this would be fun” look about him in just about every scene. Almost every character is a stereotype, from the surfer-dude-like Finn to the two gay chefs and the Paris Hilton-esque Gemma. Even Ray Winstone shows up as a crusty old treasure hunter who taught Finn everything he knows (and is now his greatest rival). And yes, you may think, “Didn’t I already see this movie when it was titled “˜Into The Blue’?” Trust me, “Into The Blue” is “The Godfather” compared to this movie.

In The Shadow of the Moon

Ah, salvation.

Just when you thought you knew everything about the Apollo missions from Ron Howard and Tom Hanks along comes “In The Shadow of The Moon”, a new documentary (“presented” by Ron Howard) about the Apollo missions featuring new interviews with 10 Apollo astronauts and newly uncovered archive footage. This is amazing stuff.

“You’ll believe man can fly.”

The astronauts who orbited and landed on the moon are the only people to have ever gazed upon the earth in its entirety with their own eyes. Imagine that. Imagine seeing the whole of everything you’ve known before in what looks like a small marble in a black sea. And the Apollo missions may have been the last time our country did something that made the rest of the world stand up in awe of our achievement.

Each of the 10 astronauts interviewed bring an amazing perspective on the events nearly 40 years later. Michael Collins stands out in particular with his humor and good-natured “aw shucks” fondness for the historic event he was a part of. You’ll laugh, you’ll cheer, you may cry. It’s a brilliant film and out on DVD now.

Roy Scheider

Venerable, salty actor Roy Scheider died last week and I would be remiss if I didn’t mention it. Obviously his best known character was as Chief Martin Brody in Jaws, a man with a crippling fear of the water who moves his family out to Amity Island so his kids wouldn’t be brought up in the crime-riddled streets of New York. His character was not without faults (using a tumbler for a wine glass, for example, showed more than just a lack of etiquette) but bound by duty he was going to get that shark.

I never knew much of Roy Scheider personally, but I suspect he was a lot like that. I’ve always enjoyed his work from “The French Connection” to “Jaws” to “The Rainmaker” to “RKO 281″. He never seemed to lose the sense of play as an actor and that translated to the screen. IMDB.com lists this quote in his biography (unattributed): “The important thing is to do good work, no matter what medium you do it in.” That’s sage advice. He was an icon and he’ll be missed.

Coming up”¦

Later in the week I’ll offer up my Oscar predictions. Take them as you will, I’ve rarely won an office pool.

–Brett Deacon does not, in fact, own a dog

It’s No Joke

When I first heard that Heath Ledger would be playing The Joker in the upcoming Batman movie, “The Dark Knight” I was less than thrilled. He seemed too serious, his voice was too deep, too grounded, too brawny. To me this wasn’t ideal casting for a character we’ve often thought of as lanky, psychotic, and with a high-pitched giggle. Really? Ennis Del Mar is the Joker? I didn’t see. Then I saw the trailer and realized I knew nothing and Christopher Nolan knew everything. In those 2 ½ minutes Ledger’s Joker was everything I thought he wouldn’t be and more. And that was just 2 ½ minutes! I was stoked (and still am).

This week Heath Ledger gave us a reason to be so serious.

Last Tuesday afternoon, on the day the Oscar nominations were announced, the man who I was now eagerly awaiting to see play the clown prince of crime was found dead in his NYC apartment. He was only 28 years old.

I’ll admit it the first thing that popped into my head was what a cruel publicity campaign Warner’s was trying to run. Now I wish that had been true. He was truly becoming a master of his craft. He was just beginning to produce some truly remarkable work. Sadly, thats all gone now. And more importantly, a family has lost a father and a son.

Warner’s has said that all of Ledger’s work on “The Dark Knight” was completed before his death. So come July we’ll all get to enjoy his complete performance and try to forget that it was his last. Life is sadly temporary, but film is immortal. My thoughts go out to his friends and family. He will be missed.

The 2007 Oscar Nominations

As I said above, the Oscar nominations came out last Tuesday. I can’t say I’m surprised by any of the nominations. Two of my favorite films of 2007, “Gone Baby Gone” and “Charlie Wilson’s War”, only managed get 1 nomination each (well deserved supporting nods for Amy Ryan and Philip Seymour Hoffman). “300” was shut out completely (a film I would’ve thought would be a shoo-in for technical awards at the very least).

But none of it truly bothers me. I still dig the movies I put on my top 10 list and stand by them. The Academy Awards are a very political process because studios believe that an Oscar nomination gives their film credibility (“Transformers” got three nominations, by the way). Nominations and awards are stamped onto DVD packaging so the average consumer will be “informed” as to what are the “good” movies. It’s ridiculous.

Star of a 3-time Oscar nominated film.

Steven Spielberg didn’t win a Best Director award until 1993. Martin Scorsese got his first last year. Alfred Hitchcock never won an award for one of his films (he was given a lifetime achievement award).

It’s impossible to choose one great film over another as being the best (or one actor or actress, or one screenplay, and so on). Some years, one film or performance truly does stand above the rest but most years there are easily a half dozen films that are all on the same level. Just because your favorite film of the year wasn’t nominated for an award doesn’t mean it wasn’t a good film. It entertained the hell out of you, didn’t it? That should be success enough for you. Besides, might not even be an Academy Awards show this year.

The Room

Onto the lighter side of things. There’s an odd phenomenon going on at the Sunset 5 theaters here in LA on the last Saturday of every month. At midnight, one of their theaters is packed for this little (and quiet terrible) movie called, “The Room” which was made in 2003. I set out in a rare Los Angeles monsoon to give it a look.

Make no mistake, this movie is AWFUL. A true vanity project for writer-director-star Tommy Wiseau. Wiseau plays Johnny, a creepy looking guy with long black hair and pale skin whose fiancee Lisa cheats on him. Plot elements and characters come out of left field. The dialogue is cringingly bad, the performances even worse. Wiseau’s Johnny looks easily 20 years older than his costars and appears sedated through most of the movie. It’s misogynistic. It’s discombobulated. It’s often out of focus. I’ve rarely had a better time watching a movie.

This is a rare film that you HAVE to see it in a crowded theater. It’s an experience where shouting at the screen is downright encouraged (don’t worry, you won’t miss any crucial plot twists, there aren’t any). Most of the loyal fans have seen the movie dozens of times. They shout out lines, point out obvious plot holes, and inexplicably throw plastic spoons in the air. And they cheer from the moment the film starts and stay right through the end credits. It’s really a great time.

All the best.

(and Godspeed, Heath).

–Brett Deacon has spent much of his spare time this week in Los Angeles lining up animals two by two.

Okay, maybe it’s not the greatest of all time. It may very well be the worst, but it’s the one you’re reading now so you can decide how ironic the title is. I’m a movie freak (a movie super-freak actually). I’m such a movie freak that a few months ago I did the unthinkable: I packed up all of my belongings and moved them west from Chicago to Los Angeles. I know, unheard of right? But films have been a big part of my life and for a film junkie there is no better town to live in.

There’s a quote from Lawrence Kasdan’s underrated film, “Grand Canyon” in which the character of Davis (a film producer played Steve Martin) imparts these words of advice to a friend: “That’s part of your problem: you haven’t seen enough movies. All of life’s riddles are answered in the movies.” I’ve always taken those words to heart (probably to a fault).

In this column I’ll provide many unsolicited opinions, you’ll just have to deal with it. There’ll be reviews, commentary, observations, and whatever else they get away with (hopefully I won’t have to resort to hard core nudity). So as they say in the business, on with the show.

CLOVERFIELD
Director: Matt Reeves

“Cloverfield” is a high-concept movie which claims to be simply an unedited tape found in the area that used to be known as Central Park. And we know it’s a used tape because it begins with footage a month prior to the events that apparently wiped out Central Park, a simple morning between young Manhattenites Rob and Beth. Cut to (or rather the tape jumps to) one month later and it’s Rob’s going away party. We learn Rob and Beth have broken up and he’s been promoted to a new job in Japan. His best friend Hud begrudgingly takes on the task of recording testimonials from Rob’s friends. A clever device that enables us to be introduced to most of the main characters before a 200 foot creature quite literally crashes the party. From then on, it’s a survival story as we follow these young 20-somethings as they try to escape the island of Manhattan (a task that is much harder than “I Am Legend” would lead you to believe).

The Cloverfield Monster. Maybe.

The execution of the concept is a little too slick. We’re lead to believe that the footage is presented to us unedited and if this was really the case, the in-camera editing is way too convenient. Plus, at several points during the film, the tape “cuts back” to Rob & Beth’s date on Coney Island. And the events take place over 7 hours, yet there is only one tape lasting 84 minutes. In the midst of a monster attack on New York City, Hud manages to capture every key dramatic moment. But hey, it’s a movie about yuppies trying to survive a monster attack, these are the least of the logistical problems.

The movie is genuinely entertaining, gripping, and the effects are nothing short of jaw-dropping. The script is smart and the characters are likeable. I particularly enjoyed the party scene at the beginning (which would’ve been an entertaining film if itself it weren’t for the monster attack and all.) And I liked how they never explain what the monster is or why it came to wreak havoc (it doesn’t really matter). “Cloverfield” is never boring and the concept does make the events seem more personable than any other monster attack in cinema history.

THE BUCKET LIST
Director: Rob Reiner

Auto mechanic Carter Chambers (Morgan Freeman) has been diagnosed with terminal cancer, but has the good fortunate to be roomed with the hospital’s owner Edward Cole (Jack Nicholson). Edward has lived a selfish, greedy life but rooming with Carter and facing his own death makes him become quick friends and when Edward learns of Carter’s “Bucket List” he encourages Carter to accompany on a once in a lifetime (and as it so happens last of a lifetime) trip around the world to see and do everything they wanted to do in their lives before kicking the bucket.

“We’re too talented for this shit.”

The Bucket List is the cutest movie about death I’ve ever seen. And therein lies the problem because it lacks the depth and sadness that a film dealing with terminal illness should carry. Morgan Freeman is rock solid (as always), but always seems to be running away from his problems rather than dealing with them. Jack Nicholson is entertaining but a bit of a goof. Their trip doesn’t reveal any great truths about life and death, but rather plays like a travelogue show you’d see on The Discovery Channel (though I suspect such a show would deal with more human insight). There are some genuinely funny moments in the film, but again it’s too cute for its own good.

Speaking of lists, and this may seem odd seeing as how this is my first column, here are my top 10 favorite films of 2007.

1. No Country For Old Men – As close to perfect as any film has been in recent memory (though I still have a few issues with the third act, they’re minor quibbles at best.) And Javier Bardem’s Anton is perhaps the most terrifying and cold-blooded villain in recent film history.

2. Juno ““ In a year that seemed to be dominated by fantastic male performances, Ellen Page’s effort in this film’s title role was as good if not better than any of them. This is a rare film that manages to balance honest humor, sharp dialogue, and heart. We need more of these.

3. Gone Baby Gone ““ A brilliant debut by Ben Affleck and terrific performance by his brother Casey Affleck. A lot has been said about it’s gritty, realistic depiction of Boston, but I appreciated the overall tone of the film, which in my opinion is the hardest thing for a director to pull off and Affleck did a phenomenal job.

4. There Will Be Blood ““ A great film anchored by an iconic performance by Daniel Day-Lewis, old-fashioned direction by Paul Thomas Anderson (who remembers that this guy directed “Boogie Nights”?) and a mesmerizing original score from Radiohead’s Johnny Greenwood. It’s perhaps a bit too long, but it does have my favorite last line in any movie this year.

5. Charlie Wilson’s War ““ It’s great to see Aaron Sorkin back writing screenplays, though the script may be a little too glib for its own good. A highly entertaining film. Tom Hanks and Phillip Seymour Hoffman had fantastic chemistry.

6. 3:10 to Yuma ““ One of my favorite trends of 2007 was the return of the Westerns and the remake of “3:10 to Yuma” pulled off the rare achievement of being better than the original, anchored largely by an incredible performance by Russell Crowe as one of cinema’s bad guys you like to root for.

7. 300 ““ Visually the most impressive film of the year also the most ass-kickiest (see now if I had an editor, he would’ve flagged that word). This is the film I hoped Gladiator would’ve been.

8. Ratatouille ““ I went into this film with low expectations. I know, it’s Brad Bird and it’s Pixar, but it’s also a film about a rat in Paris who can cook. But I should’ve known better as it has a lot of heart, great voice performances, and features incredible animation (Pixar still produces far and away the best computer animation out there). And Anton Ego’s solemn monologue about criticism was particularly memorable.

9. The Kingdom ““ Some may dub it “CSI: Saudi Arabia”, but I thought it was the best political thriller of the year. The first and last 20 minutes of this film were absolutely fantastic. I know, that’s only 40 minutes, but they were really that good and the bits in the middle weren’t half bad either.

10. Michael Clayton ““ Another strong directorial debut this year, this one from Tony Gilroy (writer of this film along with the Bourne films). Who knew he had this in him? Anchored by a strong cast, George Clooney continues to show a knack for finding the right projects for him, something which more actors should take note.

I also really enjoyed “Live Free or Die Hard” (in a very weak summer for so-called blockbusters, this was one that really delivered), “Knocked Up”, “The Bourne Ultimatum”, “Sicko”, “Seraphim Falls” (another great and overlooked Western this year), “Hot Fuzz”, “Waitress” (outstanding performance from Keri Russell and a heartbreaking reminder of Adrienne Shelly’s tragic death), “American Gangster”, and “The Savages”.

A few films that I did not see that may very well have made this list include: “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford”, “Once”, “Rescue Dawn”, “In The Valley of Elah”, “Into The Wild”, and “I’m Not There”. Give me a break, I just started. I’ll get to them eventually.

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got for a first swing. I hope you dug it and I hope you continue checking back in with this inappropriately named column.

All the best.

–Brett Deacon continues to plug away in Los Angeles despite having the foresight to arrive in the middle of the Writer’s Strike. He spends his ample free time ducking deadlines, spending way too much time in line waiting for In-N-Out burgers, and trying to remember where he left his Thomas Guide.