Here are today’s top entertainment headlines:

• The seminal rap group Wu Tang Clan has announced plans to release a new album this summer.  The release will be the first group album since 2001.  To prepare for the outing, the remaining members of the group have been getting their voices ready by smoking a lot of pot/crack.

• This past weekend, the Screen Actors Guild presented it’s top award to the “little indie” film, Little Miss Sunshine.  The SAG awards are voted on by the Guild members and are more than “just an excuse to give out meaningless awards while patting themselves on the back.”  The award for “Best Movie About Stuff” went to The Departed while the award for “Best Use of Their Natural Good Looks” went to Scarlett Johannsen.

• And finally, legendary bluesman, B.B. King, was hospitalized last Friday for undisclosed reasons, however, police have not ruled out foul play.  According to the police report, King was spotted “playing” another guitar just prior to being found unconscious in his dressing room at the Grand Opera House in Galveston.  Due to “suspicious circumstances” and “evidence found at the scene,” authorities have arrested King’s longtime guitar, Lucille.

That’s all for today’s news, stay tuned to this channel for all the news that matters least but you still care about.

(Compiled by J. Allen)

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